Warehouse 13 (2009–2014): Season 3, Episode 4 - Queen for a Day - full transcript

Come back here.
No! Don't...

No, don't, don't.

All right.

Ah. I got you.

Talk to me, Goose.
Goose?

Yeah, I'm Maverick.
Get it?

No.

Tower, this is
Ghost Rider,
requesting a fly by?

You know, it kind of takes
the fun out of things
if I have to explain it.

Oh, I can see
how that could happen.

Right. Did you
find Grant's flask?



Sort of. There's just,
um, one thing.

One? Try hundreds.
Hundreds and
hundreds of things.

We're looking for a
flask at a Civil War
re-enactment.

A place where
all flasks go to die.

A world where
everyone has a flask.

Hey, that sounds
like cannon fire.

Brilliant. There's that
college education
rearing its head.

What do you want
and why did you call?

Oh, right. Urgent.

Do you know where
Artie keeps the tiny
little marshmallows?

Because
he won't tell me.

Like he needs
marshmallows. Right?

Hey, Pete?
Yeah?

Yeah, you know, that Artie.



He's, he's looking
pretty good these days,
don't you think?

It's all the exercise
I get chasing artifacts
without any help.

Sorry.
Oh.

Sorry.
Man. Artie, that cold sounds
like it's getting worse.

Does it?
You should be resting.

That's a very
good idea. Resting.

If only I were paying
somebody to help me
with this kind of thing.

I know, right?
Well, Claudia
will be back soon.

Yeah, yeah.
Oh!

Who made this thing?

Talk to me, Goose.
Huh?

What, did no one
see Top Gun?

Pete, there's someone
here to meet you.

Oh, yeah. Sorry,
Leena. I'm kind
of busy right now.

She says she's
your ex-wife, Pete.

Pete?

Hey, Myka.
Twenty-seven hours
to Dubai and back.

And I know. I know that
I should have gone to the
Warehouse first.

Myka.
It was closer.
I mean, the B&B.

Myka...

How did this
even get to
Dubai, anyway?

I mean, it's not like Dubai
looks like Dakota on the
packing slip.

Okay? And. Is that me?
Oh, my God. I smell.

I smell, don't I?
Okay. So, shower.
Shower and then nap

and then Warehouse.
Okay, but Myka,

I have somebody
that I'd like
you to meet.

Myka, this is
Amanda.

Amanda Lattimer.
Nice to meet you.

Hi. Oh, it's...
It's so nice to meet you.
I'm Myka Bering.

Amanda Lattimer.
But you're not
Pete's mom.

And you're
not his sister.

Because his sister...
Are you his cousin?

No. No,
I'm not his cousin.

And I'll be changing
the name. I'm his...

Amanda.

Amanda.

And, and...
And Myka...
You're back.

And. And you guys...

You guys have met.
Oh. That's great.

Well, Amanda
new-last-name

was just telling
me that she's
your not-cousin.

She's not.
That's right. Um.

Amanda, Myka's probably
really tired, and...

No, I'm fine.
Need to shower.

So. Let's, uh, step over
this way. Shall we?

But.
Oh, here we go.
Look at this room.

I would just like
to properly welcome your...

That's rude.

Okay, spill.

So, what are you doing
in the middle
of South Dakota, Marine?

Oh, uh, I got...
I got reassigned.

Reassigned. Here.
From D.C.
Mm-hmm.

Mm-hmm.
That's a punishment.
What did you do this time?

No. No, no, no.
Oh, please.

No, I. No.
I didn't do anything.

Mm-hmm.
Well. No, wait.
Uh, that's...

Let me... I did
something. But it was
a good thing, okay?

That's why I'm here.

Well, whatever it was,
I'm sure it wasn't
intentional.

Uh, no, it was.
It's a...
It's a promotion.

A promotion
to Uni-ville.
Univille.

And what are you
doing in Univille, anyway?

Oh. Oh.

I found something that
belongs to you.

Shut it.

Whoo-hoo-hoo!
Legend Makers,
first edition?

Okay. How do
you do that?

And just like that,
you're a 12-year old boy.
Oh.

I never thought that
I would see this again.

Thank you,
thank you,
thank you.

Okay.

Oh, man.

Anyway. So, I should,
um. I should go.

Yeah?
Yeah.

Okay.
Okay.

Hey, Amanda.
Yeah.

Are you going to tell me
why you're really here?

It's disconcerting
how well we know
each other, isn't it?

Um...

I'm getting remarried.

Wow. Remarried?

That's awesome.
That's amazing.
That's terrific.

Thanks.
Congratulations. So,
when is the wedding?

Tomorrow, actually.
It's tomorrow!

That's. Oh, that's
tomorrow.

I would have
told you sooner,

but, apparently, I have
to get clearance to talk
to my ex-husband now.

You have
no idea the kind of
governmental hoops

I had to jump
through to get here.

You know what?
I don't know if I can get
away on such short notice.

Oh. Sorry. Pete,
I, um...

I didn't come here
to invite you.

I came to get
my grandfather's ring.

Oh. The ring. The ring.
That's right.

You know what?
I still have that.

Sorry. Sorry.
No, no, no.
Please.

Let me, uh. It's, um.
It's upstairs.
I'll go get it.

Okay?

Bless you.

Oh. Oh, hi.
Uh, sorry.

Uh, I was just
looking for...

Pete's wife. I mean,
you're... Ex-wife.
Pete's ex-wife.

That we actually
didn't know he had.

Just Amanda would
be fine. And you are?

Oh, I'm sorry. Sorry.
I'm Arthur. Artie.

You don't want to.

I was actually just
looking for Myka.

Or Leena.
Leena would do.

How about me?
Would I do?

Oh, hi. Hey.

He... I wasn't.
I was looking for...

Me. He was
looking for me

because I'm back.

Right. Exactly, she's
back, I wanted to
welcome her back.

Well, now
you've seen her.

You've seen her.
She's seen you.

Everybody's
seen everybody.

So, now everybody
is going to go.
Here we go.

Out the door.
Bye-bye. So long.
That a boy.

Nothing to see.
Nothing to see.
All right, all right.

Married?
You were married?

I don't believe you.
Can't I have any
privacy around here?

And you.
Sneaking around.
Me?

I'm not sneaking.
There was no sneaking.
Sneaking.

Married. I mean,
how were you...
Okay, okay, okay. Show's over.

Pete is absolutely
right. Myka, I am
ashamed of you.

Nosing around like that.
This man needs
his privacy.

Married.

Bless you.
How could you not...

Go!
What?

Upstairs.
Now. Go. Go.
Move, move, move.

Sorry about that.
They're, uh...
Curious.

I was going to say
"butt pains,"
but, okay.

Oh!

So, this is it, huh?

Our, uh...
Our reason for
seeing each other.

No, I guess
this is it.

Uh, look, Amanda.
You pretty much missed
out on the whole

amends part
of my life.

I mean, not that
you were exactly around,
either. So, I guess I...

I guess I never thought
that I was going to
have to do this.

Now that I hear
it out loud, it's...

It sounds like
such a cop-out.

The thing is,
um, the reason
that I never have

is because you're
the hardest one
to make amends to.

I really screwed us up.

Amanda, I'm sorry.

Thanks.

And listen,
Pete, it's water
under the bridge.

You know, I think
everything worked
out for the best.

I guess so. Now,
what about this guy?

Was it... It's not...

It's not anyone
I know, is it?
Of course not.

Oh, God.
Thank God.

But he's the one,
though, huh?

Yeah. He really is.

I mean, not that you
weren't. It's just...
It's different this time.

You know, Michael is
sweet and charming.

You had me at "yes."

So let's...
Shut 'er down.

Oh, I'm just...
I'm just excited
about the wedding.

I know.
You know,
fairy-tale, castle...

I mean, it's a rented
castle in the Poconos,
but still.

I've been one of a few good
men for a long time.
So, I'm ready to

just be a princess
for a day.

Well, you deserve it.
The prince and the fairy tale.

All of it.

Thanks, Pete.
Yeah.

Be happy, Amanda.

I will be.

Well, why was
she here? Alimony?

What. Are you two striking
up the band again, or...

What? No.
She's getting remarried.

BOTH: What?

Stop.

That's why
I didn't tell you. Okay?

I don't want to
talk about it.

Pete, you're...
You're right.

I'm sorry.
Your private life is
none of our business.

We shouldn't
have intruded.

You know. It wasn't
just one thing.

I mean, mostly, it was
because we were
just too young.

At least,
I was too young.

Amanda was...
She was very driven.

She always knew exactly
what she wanted.

It's what the Marines
call a "hard charger."

Oh, man. She was amazing.

I mean, of course
she's a major now.

And I was not amazing.

Uh. I didn't know
what I wanted,

and I definitely
wasn't ready for a
lifetime commitment.

I mean, not then.
Now, I just wonder.

If it could have worked?

Yeah. No.
Maybe. No.

Uh. I don't know.
People?

We have a problem.

One beehive,
one bee.

We are missing the bee.

I don't know what
the bee does,

but if it was in Warehouse 2,
we can bet it was probably

something bizarre and deadly.

We'd better find it now.

Okay, look. I came
in here and I put the
beehive right here.

Right. Right.
I remember, because...

You gasped.
You rarely gasp.

Pete's right.
Why did you gasp?
Leena?

Amanda. Amanda's bag
was right there.

Pollen.

If Amanda somehow
triggered the latch

then the bee could
have fallen right into...

No! No, no,
no, no, no!

An artifact did not fall
into my ex-wife's bag
on her way

to her perfect
fairy-tale wedding.

No. That did not happen.

Artie's Law
of Artifacts states

the worst thing
that can happen
with an artifact

will happen
with an artifact.

It's in Amanda's bag.

Now you can panic.

Amanda. Hey.

There's my future husband.

Welcome back.
I missed you.
Hi.

I missed you, too.
Oh, look. I got the ring.
Great.

Ow!
You all right?

Yeah, just...

Oh, oh. There's
the bride, at last.

And I need you talk to
you about the caterer.

I think he's a
complete idiot.

Okay. I guess
I'll see you
at the altar.

Ooh.

And after the whole
hoopla with the
inter-dimensional space,

I realized what I
really wanted was to
be a Warehouse Agent.

So, what about you?
What's your story?

Oh, you know my story.
ATF, Jimi Hendrix's guitar,

and the first time
I saw Artie's eyebrows.

I mean, like,
before all that.

Well, before all
that is the past.

Which is where I'd
like to keep it.

Oh. Well.
Word of warning?

At the Warehouse,
the past doesn't always stay
in the past. Literally.

Did I mention we
have a time machine?

Why doesn't
that surprise me?

Look, it isn't here.
Are you sure?

Silver flasks,
gold flasks, wooden flasks,
flasks with flaps,

flasks with knobs.
I get it. A lot of flasks.

Look, we've been through this
trunk twice, and none of them
match the description.

So, why don't we
just shut this whole
shindig down,

we'll flash badges,
and we'll body-search
till we find it?

Because that's
not what we do?

I mean, Warehouse Agents,
we use stealth.

We're stealthy.
I mean, can you imagine how
these nut-jobs will react

when they find out
that somebody has
Ulysses S. Grant's flask?

Guys carrying
real bayonets.

Exactly. And if one
of them drinks from it,

he starts believing
that he's fighting
that war while

he's carrying a bayonet.
Artie said at the
last re-enactment...

I know. The re-enactor with
the flask went postal
and stabbed two soldiers.

I know. But we still use
stealth. Just really,
really fast stealth.

So then,
what's the plan,
oh, stealthy one?

I... Listen.
I don't exactly have a...

Oh.

Why do I feel like Laverne?
Oh, no. You're not Laverne.

I'm Laverne.
You're Shirley.

I am not Shirley.

I've been doing
a little digging
to find out...

All right. To find out what
this beehive artifact
actually does.

I'm a little rusty on
my hieroglyphics, so...
No age jokes, please.

So, it may take
me a little time.

Okay, Artie. Just,
just let us know.

Wow. This is at lot nicer than
the Love Me Tender Chapel
in Vegas.

Oh, tell me you didn't...
Oh, yeah. Yeah.

BRIDESMAID 1: That is
the dress. Oh, my gosh.

Wait. You were supposed
to bring something blue.

Wait, wait, wait, wait.
No. I was supposed
to bring the garter.

No, I was the garter.
You got it all confused.

Ow. Oh, Amanda,
You look so beautiful.

This thing is
getting worse.

Look at that.
Oh, God.
What did you do?

On your wedding day.
Amanda, what's wrong with you?

Amanda? You poor thing.

I'll get you a
band-aid.

Triple antibiotic.
You need triple antibiotic.

Okay.

Marines!
Ten-hut.

Major. Amanda.

You look great,
Major.

I'm so glad
you made it.

Sir, you look
fantastic.
Oh. Thanks, Scott.

It's "ma'am."

So glad you
guys are here.

You should sit down and rest,
Major. Put your feet up.

No, I'm okay. Thanks.

You need to conserve
your energy
I'll get you a chair.

No, I'm good, guys.

Excuse me.

Pete. Myka, right?
What are you doing here?

Wow. You, you,
you look... Wow.

Amanda, we're really sorry
to intrude. But, um...

We have a
little problem.

Um. Can we talk
to you for a minute?

So, what's with the parade?

Is this what
happens when you
become an officer?

It's the bridal party.
Marines take
their jobs seriously.

Hey, I was a
Marine. I was
never a stalker.

Okay. Is there
somewhere we
can talk privately?

Oh. Oh, no.
It's Michael's parents.

His mother doesn't know
how to end a sentence,
let alone a conversation.

Just do me a favor.
I have to talk to my
friends for a minute.

So, just take care of the
Martins for me. All right?

I don't care what you have to
do, just keep them away from
me. Let's go in here.

Hello. What's going on?
Is this some sort of
Marine thing?

We're looking
for our son.

So, what is the problem?
We can't tell you.

Why not?
We can't
tell you.

It's just that, when you
were at the B&B,
something got loose.

"Got loose"?
What kind of something?

Uh. We can't tell
you that, either.

Pete, if this is about me
getting remarried...

What? Wait, wait.
What? No.

Okay? Scout's honor.

You were kicked out of the
Scouts when you were 10.

I did not start that fire.
Look, Amanda. Trust me. This
isn't about you.

Then, why are you here?

Look. It's "need
to know," Major.

And you don't
need to know.

Fine. Fine. Whatever this
problem is, what are you going
to do to fix it?

Or can you not
tell me that either?

We just need to
search your bag.
It's actually that bag.

Pete?

It's a great dress.
Really. Sorry.

My Sandy Alomar, Jr.
Signed baseball?

Backup plan. I wasn't
sure the comic
book would work.

So, does this have
something to do
with your new job?

Why you're in Uni-ville?
Univille.

So, you weren't lying.
It really is a promotion.

Ha-ha!

Behold.
Bee-hold.
Behold.

All right. All right.
Yeah. Um. You might, uh.
You might want to duck.

Well, there you go.
Bam. Well.

No dead bodies,
no mass destruction,
no swarm of killer bees.

Although,
I've got to tell you,
it did cross my mind.

So much for Artie's law.
What was that? Some kind
of weapon?

Uh, that is your
wedding being saved.

Okay. So, the good news
is, is that it is over.

All right. Then, thank
you for taking care
of whatever that was.

Yeah. Yeah,
uh, no worries.

Listen. Uh, we're sorry
to barge in like that.

And, uh. You shalln't
see me again.

Pete.

Um, could I talk
to you for a second?

I'm going to go see
if there's a moat.

I hope there's a moat,
because I really,
I love moats.

She loves moats.

Well, now that we're stealthy,
do you have any ideas how

to find this flask
in a hay stack?

I don't know. Mingle?
See if there's anyone
here taking

this whole re-enactment
business too seriously?

Run, you
scurvy Yank! Run!

I kind of think
showing up covers
that category.

Okay. Nix
the negativity.

All right, Zen Master? Think
of it like when you were
a kid. You know? Get into it.

Oh, what? There was no
make-believe in your
mysterious past?

I say we hoist a musket
and enter the fray.

And I say that
we talk to that guy.

Did you know the
guy who hit you?

It was Private Johnson.

The guy went crazy.
Right in the middle
of the skirmish.

Started punching other players
and hitting them with the butt
of his rifle.

I mean, we have rules
against that sort of thing.

Was he drinking
out of a flask?

Well, I. You know, I suppose
so. I mean, we all are.
That's about half the fun.

You're dead, rebel.
Huh?

So are you, Yank.

Long live Abe Lincoln.

What? I'm
getting into this.

Hey, lie down.
You're dead.

Huh? No. Oh, no.
I'm not dead. I'm just.
I'm just wounded.

Yeah. Oh. Oh.
In the leg, I think.

Yeah, it's... It's cool.
I can still fight.

Hey. Do you know how
much it cost to
defoliate these trees

to make it look like the
Battle of Shiloh?

We're committed professionals.
And you, rebel dog, are dead.

All right. Don't get
your long johns in
a bunch. I'm going.

So, now, if you're dead,

does that mean you're still
the Senior Agent here?

Just find Johnson.

Look for the
craziest guy out here.

So, Pete. I just wanted to say
that, um. I'm sorry, too.

What you said back
in Uni-ville...
Univille.

Stop that.
Right.

It wasn't all
your fault.

It was easy at the time
to blame your drinking,

but it takes two
to screw up a tango.

Yeah, well, I was never
really much of a Pacino.

I was more of a
Tom Cruise, you know?

Yeah. You're Maverick.
I remember.
Thank you.

The thing is...

Back then, I just...
I just wanted so much.

Wanted to do so much.
And I couldn't let
anything get in my way.

Including you.

Maybe if I hadn't
been so headstrong...

Who knows, huh?

Yeah. But, hey.

Look at you now, Major.

You've got
your Cinderella dress.

I've never seen
you look happier.

I think...

I think things worked
out exactly the way
they were supposed to.

Amanda, have you seen
my parents? I can't find
them anywhere.

Hey.
Hey.

Aren't you... Isn't he...

Uh, Pete. Yeah.

Pete.
Yes.

Glad you could make it.
Good to finally meet you.
Hey.

Oh, well, you just
had to be nice,
didn't you?

Pete was...
Listen, Michael. Uh.

You got yourself
a fine little
Major there. So.

Thank you.

Why don't you and
I go find your parents?
Yeah.

I am just dying
to chat with your mom.

So, that was the groom, huh?
Yeah, can you believe it?

Well, your ex
definitely has a type.

What? You think that
guy looks like me?

With the hair and
the square jaw

and the Captain America
attitude? Please.

I'm so much
cooler than that.

It's the weirdest thing.
My folks, they
just disappeared.

We'll find them, Michael.
All right? Nobody gets in
or out of here until we do.

I'm going to go look for them.
You just stay here and do
whatever it is that brides do.

Okay?
Mm-hmm.

And when we find them,
at exactly 1500 hours,

come hell or high water
or in-laws or exes, we are
getting married.

And then, I'll finally be
Mrs. Michael Martin.

And I will finally
own you, woman

No one gets in
or out of here.

I will finally
own you, woman

Come on.
Let's go.
Okay.

Whoa. Hi. Excuse us.

Nobody in or out.
That's what she said.

Okay.

Look, Marines,
there's no reason to
get worked up here.

We were just leaving,
and I...

Pete?
I'm all right.

No. No. I mean, Pete.

Nice hats.
Run!

Help me.

Hey. Artie's Law.
Oh, yeah.

"It's a wedding,
Pete. Why would
need our teslas?"

What is this, Pete?

Where did the rest of them go?
What the hell is happening?

Michael is out there
and his parents...

I'm sorry. But right
now, I'm worried about
the guys with swords.

Spit it out, Lattimer.
I assume this is all being

caused by your little top
secret whatever-it-is.

I told you
"need to know."

Given that we're being
attacked by my own
wedding party,

I'm pretty sure
I need to know.

The, uh, beehive artifact once
belonged to a female Pharaoh

who ruled Egypt
around 1479 BCE.

Hatshepsut.
Bless you.

Uh, what? No. That wasn't a
sneeze. That was actually the
female Pharaoh's name.

Uh, Hatshepsut. So, Hatshepsut
created the artifact using the
pheromones of honeybees.

Well, beehive, bee.
It makes sense.

Yes. And then, she
would prick herself with
the bee,

and then, inject
the stinger really,
into her body.

She became
the Queen Bee.
Precisely. Ah.

What about her?
What about who?

You. You just said Hatshepsut.

Oh, no, now,
that was a sneeze.

Wait. You. You said "stinger."

Artie, you did say "stinger."

Okay, Artie, I'm looking at
this bee, and there is no
stinger.

Die, scum! Come on,
you rebel dog.

Dude, what the
hell? I shot you.

Come on,
you rebel dog.
Fight like a man.

Oh, man. Put the gun down.
I killed you.

You mock me, traitor.

But I shall be victorious
for my great country!

No, no, no. I have come
to aid you, brother.

Together, we will...
To hell with this.

Hey!

Johnson, listen.
I'm not actually a re-enactor.

The truth is,
you've got something
very dangerous.

Die, scum!

Stop! Stop, sir, I beg of you.

You would not raise your hand
against a lady, would you?

I would never harm a woman.
But I intend to kill this
scurvy grayback.

Afraid not.

Told you I was Laverne.
Such a Laverne move.

Come on, Shirley. Come on.

What? Oh, the mini-tesla?
It's my own design.
It's pretty cool, huh?

Dude, that should be
your drag name.
Minnie Tesla.

Okay. They have
these outfits for
the female re-enactors.

I figured if I could...

What? What.
What did I do?

No. Uh, no, no, no, no.
It's not. It's. It's nothing.
It's not you.

It's just that, for a...

Second there, you were
a lot like my big sister.

You know, she used
to save my butt a lot
when we were little.

So, you do have a past.
And a sister.

Well, tell. What's she
like? Where does she live?
What does she do? Details.

No, she...

She died, Claud.
A while back.

How do I always
do that with you?

God. I'm sorry, Jinksy.

It's okay. Really.
It's, uh. It's all good.

Right. Well, let's, um...

Snag it and bag it and
get the hell out of here.

What else do you
have in there?

I've got a PB and J
if you're hungry.

Forget I asked.

Damn Trekkies. Always
crashing the party,

pretending they're
time travelers.

What a nerd.

Tell me you found it.

Sort of. Uh, Amanda's
been stung.

Did she touch anyone?
Aside from her whole
bridal party, no.

I'm thinking the
finger is the source
of the infection,

so don't let her touch
anyone else with it.

Artie, we checked her
finger. There's no sign
of the stinger.

Yeah.
It, it makes its way
through the body.

It targets the glands,
and it causes the
pheromone production.

Then, whenever she
touches anyone,
she immediately creates

these worker bees who become
slavishly devoted to her every
need and protection.

Is that why they're
chasing us?

Well, you know,
probably. Because you're
seen as a threat.

And, wait, wait,
wait, wait. Yes. Yes.

It appears that things went

very badly for Hatshepsut.

You know, I must say,
I'm. I'm rather impressed
with how quickly my, uh

hieroglyphic reading skills
have come back to me.

Artie, just please
figure out how to get
the stinger out.

Consider it done.

I'm going to go
find Michael.

Wait. No, no, no,
no, no, no

No. It's. It's too
dangerous, okay?

Everything's
going to be fine.
I promise.

We'll figure this out
even if I have to...

X-ray. That's what
we'll do.

We'll x-ray her.
It will show us where
the stinger is.

All we have to do is
get her to the hospital,

find the stinger,
and get it out.

That's great.
That's a great idea.

I don't suppose you
packed any tear gas

to get past the homicidal
bridal party, did you?

I left it in my
other pants.

WOMAN: Stop! Stop!

Stop!

What are they doing?

What are they doing?

Well, don't look at it.
We'II... We'll fix it later.

First, we've got to get
out of here. Come on!

Those chairs
are rented.

Amanda!

Come on.

Amanda! Amanda!

Michael! Michael, stop!

As your pharaoh.
"Pharaoh-ess."
I command you to stop.

Hup. Hup. Hup.

Obviously, that means
something completely
different in ancient Egyptian.

Hup. Hup. Hup, hup, hup.

I give up.
When it comes
to this...

Boogedy-boogedy?

Yeah. When it comes to the
boogedy-boogedy, I'm pretty
sure you outrank me.

Hey, Artie?
Oh, Major.

That's so sweet.
So, what's the plan?

The plan. Right.

Right. The plan. I will
tell you the plan.

I just have to ask
Myka a question first.
What's the plan?

Oh. Artie, what's the plan?
Why wouldn't they listen
to their queen?

Amanda gave them
an order.

Well, Hatshepsut tried
the same thing.

But, by then, her
subjects had become so
obsessively devoted to her

that they just took it on
themselves to protect her
from anyone.

But Michael's her fianc?.
Yes, well, her husband-to-be,
most of all.

Because as a male he would
have taken her place as

Pharaoh if they
had gotten married.

What did they do to him?

They...

I think it says
"mummified him alive," but...

I'm a little loopy
from the cold medicine.

No!
Amanda, no!

That sounds bad.
Uh, call me back.

Hey, look out!
Oh!

Oh!

Sandy.
Thanks.

Don't thank me.
Go save my fianc?.

That's something
you rarely hear
your ex-wife say.

This time, stay down.

Shouldn't you
be seating people?

Pete, look out!

Ten-hut!

Really?

I found it. Use the bee.
It's a magnet.

It will draw the stinger
out at her left clavicle.

Hey, hey, hey!
I said ten-hut!

About face!
We're on our own, kiddo!

Okay. Now,
this may hurt
just a little.

Ha!

And...

You know, I would
have just sent
you the ring.

Yeah. Next time.

Next time?

There was a bit of a problem

with the, um
the bridal party.
Mushrooms.

Yeah. Yeah.
Uh, everybody ate
wild mushrooms

at the rehearsal
brunch, and kind
of went on a bad trip.

So, it's, uh.

Dearly beloved, we are
gathered here today...

You know, I was really
hoping I'd hate you.
Pete.

Pete.
Ow! What? What?

What I was
trying to say

was I wanted
to hate him,
but then,

I saw him take on those
Marines with the chair.

That was...
That was epic.

This one? This one,
right here?

Distinguished Valor in
Combat Using Rental
Furniture.

Ah. Nice.

Okay. So, this wasn't exactly
the, um, fairy-tale wedding
that I had pictured.

But it was, um,
memorable.

Yes.

Thanks, Pete.

And listen, whatever
it is that you two do,

it's exactly what you
were meant to be doing.

You're a good team.

All right. Well, uh.

At ease, Major.

Although I'd have been
a Colonel by now.

Oh.
Oh.

Huh? What?
Ouch!

Bye!
Bye.

And there we go.

Hey, um.

So, listen, I just.
I want to say

I'm sorry for not
telling you about Amanda.

I should have.

No. It's none.
It's none of my
business if you...

I mean, it wasn't
the marriage that I was
trying to keep secret.

It was me.

Um, the guy
I was before.

You know, Pete,
the drunk.
Pete, the loser.

You don't have to...
No, Myka, it's true.

It's, um. You've never
met that guy, and

I don't ever want you to.
You know?

I want you
and Artie and Claudia

and everyone
here to know the
Pete I am now.

Fair enough.

Okay.

Hey. Hey, Pete. That,
that new husband, Michael?

He's a tool.

That's, um...

That's why I
joined the ATF.

Uh, I didn't...
I was just...

I'm sorry.
I'm really sorry, Steve.

It's okay.

She, um... She was 20.
She was your age.

I shouldn't have
been digging around.

You don't have to talk
about it if you don't want to.

No, I think that
I want to, Laverne.

You would have liked her.

Yeah, I think you two
would have been good pals.

God, she was, um...

Such a hero
to me.

She was funny and smart
and she was always,

always there for me.

There was,
uh, this one time.

Jeez, you know,

I think that you would have
done the exact same thing.

We were...
We were at the park.
We were shooting hoops.

She was, uh,
she was short, but she
had this amazing lay-up.

And these kids came,
and they were going to
beat the crap out of us.

And she disappeared.
And then all
of a sudden, she...