WKRP in Cincinnati (1978–1982): Season 3, Episode 21 - Til Debt Do Us Part - full transcript

DO ME A FAVOR,

BUY THE STUFF WHEREVER
THEY SALE IT, OKAY.

AND IT'S ALMOST 10 O'CLOCK,
NESSMAN NEWS IN JUST A MINUTE.

THE DOCTOR'S OUT OF
HERE FOR THE WEEKEND.

YOU HAVE A GOOD ONE BABIES.

AND IN THE MEANTIME, HERE'S
THE MONOTONES FROM 1958.

♪ HI, WONDER, WONDER ♪

PAULA, I'M BACK. YEAH.

DO ME A FAVOR, SAY IT
TO ME ONE MORE TIME.

IT'S A GREAT SURPRISE.
IT'S NOT THE SURPRISE.

LISTEN, IT WILL DO, OKAY.



PAULA, YOU'VE MADE
ME VERY, VERY HAPPY.

YEAH, I GOTTA RUN NOW.

LISTEN, THANKS A
LOT AND GOODBYE.

AND I LOVE YOU. OKAY.

AND I LOVE YOU MR. PHONE.

AND I LOVE YOU, MR. COUNSEL.

AND EVEN KRP RIGHT NOW. I
LOVE CINCINNATI. I LOVE LIFE.

GOT ANOTHER GIRL
IN TROUBLE, JOHN.

NOT REALLY, LES.

MY EX-WIFE IS GETTING MARRIED.

- WHICH ONE?
- NUMBER ONE.

YOU REMEMBER MY
DAUGHTER, LAURIE, HER MOM.

AFTER 12 YEARS, I
AM FREE AT LAST.

I THOUGHT YOU WERE
ALREADY DIVORCED.



WELL, WE ARE. I'M TALKING
ABOUT ALIMONY, LES.

LOOK MY FIRST WIFE DOESN'T
GOUGE OUT OF MY PAYCHECK.

MY SECOND WIFE SCRAPES OFF.

I LIVE ON THE RESIDUE.

WELL, JOHN, IF YOU
JUST MUST DANCE

YOU HAVE TO PAY THE PIPER.

YEAH, BUT SHE IS
GETTING REMARRIED.

- TO WHOM?
- I DON'T KNOW.

MAYBE SHE CAUGHT DARTH
VADER, A VULNERABLE LONER.

DOESN'T MAKE ANY DIFFERENCE
IF MR. AND MRS. HITLER, FINE.

YEAH, I'M OUT OF HERE. I
SAID NO TO A VACATION.

AND NOW I GOT THE MONEY.

ARE YOU SURE SHE
IS GETTING MARRIED?

LES, SHE JUST TOLD ME SHE WAS.

I DIDN'T KNOW THIS
WOMAN PERSONALLY, JOHN,

BUT FROM WHAT'VE
TOLD ME IN THE PAST,

COUPLED WITH MY INTUITIVE
NEWSMAN'S INSTINCTS,

I THINK SHE'S GONE
COMPLETELY INSANE.

LES?

OR PERHAPS YOU'VE
ALREADY DRIVEN HER MAD,

AND SHE IS PLANNING
ON KILLING SOMEONE.

IF SHE WAS GONNA KILL SOMEONE,

SHE'D START WITH ME.

PRECISELY, IT COULD BE A SETUP.

REMEMBER WHERE YOU
HEARD IT FIRST, JOHN.

NESSMAN, I'M NOT BUYING INTO
YOUR PARANOID THEORIES, OKAY.

I'M GONNA GO TALK TO CARLSON.

- BE CAREFUL, JOHN.
- WHAT?

IT'S A LONG WALK FROM
HERE TO CARLSON'S OFFICE.

A LOT OF THINGS CAN HAPPEN.

♪ BABY, IF YOU'VE
EVER WONDERED ♪

♪ WONDERED WHATEVER
BECAME OF ME ♪

♪ I'M LIVIN' ON THE
AIR IN CINCINNATI ♪

♪ CINCINNATI, WKRP ♪

♪ GOT KIND OF TIRED OF
PACKIN' AND UNPACKIN' ♪

♪ TOWN TO TOWN, UP
AND DOWN THE DIAL ♪

♪ MAYBE YOU AND ME
WERE NEVER MEANT TO BE ♪

♪ JUST MAYBE THINK
OF ME ONCE IN A WHILE ♪

♪ I'M AT WKRP IN CINCINNATI ♪

BAILEY, BAILEY, I'M
SORRY YOU STARTLED ME.

HOW'S YOUR COLD?

- A LITTLE BETTER.
- UH-HUH.

WHERE ARE YOU GOING ON VACATION?

WELL, I'M NOT SURE, WHY?

WELL, IF YOU PLAY
YOUR CARDS RIGHT,

IT COULD BE A VACATION FOR TWO.

WHAT ARE YOU SUGGESTING, FEVER?

I'M SUGGESTING PALM TREES

SWAYING IN THE
OFFSHORE TRADE WIND.

THE HUE AND CRY OF EXOTIC BIRDS

WHEELING ACROSS AN AZURE SKY.

I'M SUGGESTING
BRONZE SUPPLE FLESH,

PUNGENT ODORS, SENSUOUS
RHYTHMS IN A TROPICAL PARADISE.

IN SHORT, ADAM AND
EVE ON EXCURSION RATES.

- ALONE? TOGETHER?
- HOPEFULLY.

SEPARATE BEDROOMS?

DETAILS, DETAILS. WE
CAN WORK THIS OUT.

WHERE?

JAMAICA, ISLAND OF
HOMEGROWN FUN.

WELL, THIS IS ALL SO SUDDEN.
I'LL HAVE TO THINK ABOUT IT.

AH, NO, DON'T
DELAY, OFFER LIMITED.

- AM I PAYING FOR THIS?
- DETAILS, DETAILS.

BUT WHEN WILL YOU BE BACK?

I DON'T KNOW. BUT IT
WON'T BE TOO LONG.

YOU KNOW, I TAKE
MY WORK SERIOUSLY.

WELL, I GOT PLANS TOO.
YOU GAVE ME NO NOTICE.

WELL, I'M SORRY. BUT IT'S A
MATTER OF LIFE AND DEATH.

JESUS. OF COURSE,
I CAN CANCEL MAN.

BUT WHAT AM I SUPPOSED
TO DO UNTIL FOUR.

YOU JUST RELAX AND PRETEND
YOU KNOW WHAT' RE DOING,

BELIEVE ME, NO ONE WILL
KNOW THE DIFFERENCE.

WAIT A MINUTE.

AH, JENNIFER, IS CARLSON BUSY?

BUSY?

HE'S WITH HERB.

TRAVIS, I NEED YOUR
HELP WITH CARLSON.

JOHNNY, TALK TO
VENUS. I GOTTA GO.

- WHERE ARE YOU GOING?
- THAT IS A LONG STORY

INVOLVING A PROMO REP
WHO'S HAVING SOME TROUBLE.

LOOK, I'M LATE ALREADY. I'LL
EXPLAIN YOU LATER. GOODBYE.

IF YOU'RE NOT BACK
IN FOUR HOURS,

I'M GOING ALL CHRISTMAS
MUSIC! THINK ABOUT IT, I MEAN IT!

PROMO REP?

APPARENTLY, SHE IS NEW IN TOWN

AND NEW ON THE JOB,
AND VERY NERVOUS.

AT LEAST THAT'S WHAT ANDY SAID.

- I SUPPOSE SHE IS YOUNG.
- AH-HA.

- GOOD-LOOKING.
- AH-HA.

ANDY SAID HE THOUGHT

IF HE COULD HELP HER
TO RELAX AND FEEL BETTER

IT WOULD SCORE
POINTS FOR THE STATION.

OH!

LISTEN, TRAVIS, I
NEED YOUR HELP, MAN.

I TOLD CARLSON LAST WEEK. I
DIDN'T WANT A VACATION NOW.

I WANT ONE STARTING MONDAY.

I CAN'T LEND YOU
ANY MONEY, JOHN.

I'VE GOT THE MONEY,
I NEED THE VACATION.

NOW YOU GONNA BACK ME
UP ON THIS AGAINST CARLSON.

WHERE WERE YOU IN CHICAGO

WATCHING SALMONS
GOING DOWN, HUH?

TRAV, I WANTED TO BE THERE, MAN.

I COULDN'T GET
CONNECTING FLIGHTS.

YOU MAKE MONEY. I MAKE MONEY.

AND NO ONE KNOWS THE DIFFERENCE.

AC, YOU GOT A MINUTE.

- SURE.
- SORRY TO BOTHER YOU.

I KNOW I TOLD YOU LAST WEEK
THAT I COULDN'T AFFORD A VACATION

AND YOU GRACIOUSLY AGREED
AND I APPRECIATE YOUR CONCERN

FOR MY CONTINUED WELL-BEING.
AND WITH THAT IN MIND,

I'D LIKE TO LEAVE MONDAY,
IF IT'S OKAY WITH YOU.

YOU KNOW, THIS IS A MATTER

THAT YOU PROBABLY GOT
TO TAKE UP WITH TRAVIS.

- TRAVIS ISN'T HERE.
- WHERE IS HE?

OUT OF THE STATION ON BUSINESS.

BUSINESS?

OH, WHAT IF SOME MAJOR DECISION
HAS TO BE MADE. WHAT THEN?

ON TARGET, BIG GUY,
YEAH, WHAT THEN?

AC, WHEN TRAVIS IS
GONE I'M ACTING PD.

OH, RIGHT, GOOD.

OKAY, WHAT DO YOU THINK, VENUS?

WELL, I'VE THOUGHT THIS
THING THROUGH THOROUGHLY.

HEY, WHO'S KIDDING? I HAVEN'T
LOST A LOT OF SLEEP OVER IT.

FEVER HERE HASN'T HAD
A VACATION IN FIVE YEARS.

I THINK HE SHOULD TAKE IT.

- OKAY.
- IT'S A GOOD DECISION.

- I AGREE.
- ALL RIGHT.

GO AHEAD, FEVER, TAKE OFF.

IT'S OKAY WITH US.

YEAH, I'VE GOT TO MAKE
TRAVEL PLANS AND FAST.

WA-WA-WAIT JOHN. WHO
IS YOUR TRAVEL AGENT?

TRAVEL AGENT, TARLEK,
I DON'T NEED ONE.

COME ON. GET IN THE 80'S.
EVERYONE NEEDS A TRAVEL AGENT.

LOOK THINK SEVEN WORDS.

NO, THINK NINE WORDS.

JIMMY "THE JET" TARTAGLIANO'S,
BON VOYAGE HOUSE OF TRAVEL.

- I DON'T KNOW, HERB.
- AH, IT'S A TRADE ON, JOHN.

YOU'RE GONNA SAVE 30 PERCENT...

HA, WHO DO AM I KIDDING?

40 PERCENT, OVER
BOOKING IT YOURSELF.

- 40 PERCENT?
- YES, SIR.

- OKAY, DO IT.
- ALL RIGHT.

HOW? WHEN? AND WHERE?

MONDAY, JAMAICA,
LODESTONE OF THE CARIBBEAN.

OH, JEEZ, JOHN.

IT'S FRIDAY. I DON'T KNOW.
I-I-I'LL DO THE BEST I CAN.

BUT YOU BETTER GIVE ME A BACKUP.

SECOND CHOICE, ANYTHING
THAT'S SOUTH OF HERE

AND SOUNDS EXOTIC,
ISOLATED, AND UNTOUCHED.

CONSIDER IT DONE.

- OKAY, AND HERB.
- YEAH?

YOU BETTER MAKE
IT TWO TICKETS, OKAY.

TWO TICKETS, CHECK.

AH, I'LL GET THAT REPLACEMENT.

I THINK ANDY'S GOT
THE LIST IN HIS OFFICE.

THANKS A LOT, MAN.

HEY, MR. CARLSON. I-I KNOW
THIS IS REALLY SHORT NOTICE.

- THANKS.
- SURE.

JOHN, THERE'S A
MR. BUDDY GRAVERS

HERE TO SEE YOU.

- JENNY.
- JENNIFER.

AH! JENNIFER.

- JOHNNY.
- BUDDY.

- JOHNNY.
- BUDDY.

BUDDY, ARTHUR. ARTHUR, BUDDY.

- BUDDY.
- ARTIE.

WELL, WHAT WHAT...
WHAT BROUGHT YOU HERE?

EH, MY LEARJET.

I'M A CHARTER PILOT. I
HAVE MY OWN COMPANY.

IT'S YOUR OWN COMPANY?

YEAH. MANY PLANES,
LARGE AND SMALL.

OKAY, BUT WHAT
CAN WE DO FOR YOU?

GET TO KNOW ME.

- HMM?
- HUH?

GET TO KNOW ME.

LOOK I WAS FLYING A CLIENT IN,

AND PAULA DECIDED
TO SURPRISE YOU

- AND FLY-IN WITH ME.
- PAULA?

YOUR EX, MY BRIDE-TO-BE.

- BUDDY.
- JOHNNY!

WELL...

I GUESS YOU TWO HAVE GOT A
LOT TO, YOU KNOW, TALK ABOUT.

YEAH.

I-I-I'VE CERTAINLY GOT A
LOT OF WORK TO DO TODAY.

SO I-I'LL BE IN MY OFFICE
IF YOU NEED ME, JOHN.

- SWELL GUY.
- WELL, WELCOME TO WKRP.

- THANKS, JOHNNY.
- SIT DOWN.

CAN I GET YOU A DRINK?
I KNOW I COULD USE ONE.

OH, MAYBE LATER, PERHAPS.

SHE TOLD ME A LOT
ABOUT YOU, JOHN.

- WHERE IS PAULA, ANYWAY?
- PAULA WHO?

AHA! I GOT YOU. IT'S
A LITTLE JOKE. HUMOR.

I WAS... I WAS DOING SOME
BUSINESS WITH THE COMPANY,

SHE GOT TIRED OF WAITING.

SO I GAVE HER A CHARGE
CARD AND SENT HER FORTH.

I WAS SUPPOSED TO MEET
HER IN AN HOUR, RIGHT HERE.

- WHERE THE HECK IS SHE?
- SURPRISE PAULA IS LATE.

- ACTUALLY, I'M EARLY.
- WELL, WHAT DO YOU WANNA DO?

YOU WANT TO TAKE A
LITTLE TOUR OF THE STATION?

WHAT I'D LIKE TO DO IS TAKE A
TOUR OF THAT RECEPTIONIST.

JENNIFER?

IS THAT TWIN ENGINE ON
THE FIRING LINE OR WHAT?

- WELL, NOT EXACTLY...
- AH, EH, OKAY. I GET IT.

SIGNS OUT, HANDS OFF,
NO TOUCHING, NO LOOKING.

- YEAH, IT'S JUST
THAT'S - DON'T EXPLAIN.

WE'RE BOTH MEN OF THE WORLD.

WE CAN'T HELP IT IF
THESE BEAUTIFUL WOMEN

KEEP THROWIN'
THEMSELVES AT US. HUH!

WELL, NO.

IT'S JUST A VISION, AND
BARELY A WOMAN LIKE PAULA.

STRAIGHTEN UP, AND FLY RIGHT.

LISTEN I MAY BE STUPID,
BUT I'M NO AMATEUR.

AND I'VE BEEN MARRIED BEFORE.

OF COURSE, THOSE TWO DIDN'T
WORK LONGER THAN SIX MONTHS.

THIS IS DIFFERENT.

I'M... I'M GLAD TO
HEAR YOU SAY THAT.

JOHN, I LOVE PAULA VERY MUCH.

I KNOW SHE IS CRAZY
ABOUT ME. NO OFFENSE.

NO.

I KNOW THAT I'M ONE
HECK OF A LUCKY GUY.

- LET'S GO BUZZ THAT BLONDE.
- WELL, BUDDY...

HEY, NOW THERE'S NO
HARM IN LOOKING, EH.

COME ON. OLD HABITS DIE HARD.

YEAH, THEY DO.

- HEY, BABY.
- HI, DARLING.

GORGY.

- HI, PAULA.
- HI, JOHN.

- SURPRISED?
- STUNNED.

- HEY, I MISSED YOU, BABY.
- OH, YOU GOT HERE EARLY.

RIGHT. I WAS GOING
THROUGH THE PREFLIGHT

THEN I SAID WHAT THE HECK.
THIS BABY WILL STILL FLY ANYWAY.

SO I JUST DROPPED MY
BEER, AND CAME ON IN.

OH!

- SORRY, IF I AM LATE.
- YOU'RE NOT LATE.

OH, WELL, I JUST HOPE
YOU WEREN'T BORED.

NO, NO.

I THINK BUDDY HAS A
GOOD TIME WHEREVER HE IS.

WHAT'S THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN?

NOTHING.

HOW'S LAURIE?

OH, FINE. SHE'S STILL IN SCHOOL.

SHE TOLD ME THAT IN LAST LETTER.

SHE DID?

YEAH, COUPLE OF WEEKS AGO.

I HAVE IT AT HOME.

HOW NICE.

EXCUSE ME.

HEY, LITTLE LADY, DON'T YOU BE

IN A HURRY TO GET OUT
OF HERE. JUST A SECOND.

PAULA, DID YOU KNOW
THAT JENNIFER AND JOHN

WERE SWEET TARTS?

AH, NO.

I AM AFRAID THERE'S
BEEN SOME MISTAKE.

OH, NOT IF YOU HAVEN'T
MARRIED HIM YET.

AHA, BABY, GOTCHA... AH-HA!

- SOME LUNCH?
- WELL, I'M HUNGRY.

WHY NOT THE FOUR OF US GO
CHOW DOWN SOME PLACE TO GET IT?

GET TO KNOW ME BETTER.

I AM AFRAID CHOWING DOWN
WOULD BE QUITE IMPOSSIBLE.

HEY, LOOK. WE'RE ONLY
GONNA BE IN TOWN FOR THE DAY.

YOU TWO HAVE GOT
A LOT TO TALK ABOUT.

I KNOW JOHN AND I ARE
HITTING IT OFF REAL GREAT.

LET'S GET ACQUAINTED.

WHO KNOWS MAYBE
THIS TIME NEXT YEAR

WE'LL JUMP INTO
ONE OF MY PLANES,

SKY OFF TO NIAGARA FALLS
FOR A LITTLE VACATION.

LET'S GET IT STARTED.

AH, JOHNNY?

AH, PLEASE, DARLING.
IT WILL BE FUN.

IT REALLY DOES SOUND INTRIGUING,

BUT I'M AFRAID I
CAN'T LEAVE MY DESK.

OH, I'LL COVER FOR YOU.

THANK YOU, BAILEY.

SETTLED. LET'S GO LADIES.

UH, JOHNNY, I WAS THINKING,

IS YOUR OFFER STILL
ON FOR JAMAICA?

I WISH WE WERE IN
THE AIR RIGHT NOW.

HER TOO?

YOU SLY SUCKER.

Johnny: WELL, HERE WE ARE.

THIS IS YOUR
FAVORITE RESTAURANT?

YEAH.

THEY... THEY DO HAVE A
REALLY BIG BUSINESS AT NIGHT.

OH, YEAH.

SHOULD WE JUST SIT?

SURE.

HOW ABOUT HERE.

LOOKS LIKE A TABLE TO ME.

AREN'T WE LUCKY THERE
IS A CHAIR FOR EACH OF US?

I THINK THEY'RE CLOSED.

IT'S KINDA MAKES US GUILTY OF
BREAKING AND ENTERING, JOHN.

WE'D BREAK IN.

FOUR CHAIRS.

SO... YOU TWO ARE
GETTING MARRIED?

OH, BET YOU BOOTY.

I THINK IT'S GREAT.

BECAUSE THE WORST THING
ABOUT NOT BEING MARRIED

IS THE LONELINESS.

RIGHT, JENNIFER?

LONELINESS?

YES. IT'S THE LONELINESS.

YOU'RE LONELY?

WELL, I'M WITH HER
MOST OF THE TIMES.

YES, I'M LONELY.

- WH... WHAT ABOUT KIDS?
- YOU THINK ABOUT HAVING KIDS?

OF COURSE.

AH!

AH, IT'S OKAY. WE ARE CUSTOMERS.

YOU MUST BE ABDUL'S WIFE.

I'M JOHNNY. I COME HERE OFTEN.

JOHNNY, I COME
HERE OFTEN AT NIGHT.

ABDUL'S SPEAKS FLUENT ENGLISH.

I GUESS HE IS NOT
HERE IN THE DAYTIME.

WHY DON'T WE START
WITH SOMETHING SPECIAL?

- YEAH.
- CHAMPAGNE?

- GOOD. SOUNDS GOOD.
- FINE.

COLD CHAMPAGNE.
CHAMPAGNE, CHAMPAGNE, UH...

COLD... CHAMPAGNE...

OH!

MAN SPEAKS THE LANGUAGE.

WELL, WHERE WERE WE?

WE WERE TALKING
ABOUT YOU AND JENNIFER.

YEAH. LET'S TALK
ABOUT YOU AND BUDDY.

HOW DID YOU MEET? I
AM CURIOUS ABOUT THAT.

WELL, ACTUALLY WE
MET IN THE SUPERMARKET.

FUNNY THING.

WE WERE REACHING FOR THE
SAME BAG OF OREO COOKIES.

I KNOW YOU GET A
KICK OUT OF THAT

BECAUSE SHE SAID YOU
CAN NEVER GET IN THE BED

WITHOUT YOUR BAG
OF OREO COOKIES.

DOES HE STILL DO THAT?

WHY, YES. HE DOES.

YOU KNOW, I THINK I BETTER
GET BACK TO THE STATION.

DOES HE STILL DO
THAT, ME-TARZAN,

YOU-JANE ROUTINE?

YOU WORK HASTENS.

FELLAS, I'VE LOST MY
LINE CLOCK YEARS AGO.

AND I GUESS YOU
SHOULD BE GETTING BACK.

- WHY?
- YEAH.

- OUR MONKEY'S BEEN ILL.
- AH!

HAVE A NICE LUNCH.

- SEE YOU LATER.
- YEAH, RIGHT HERE.

THANKS A LOT, SWEETHEART.

YOU'RE A HECK OF
A LUCKY GUY, JOHN.

OH, I THINK YOU'RE THE
LUCKY GUY HERE, BUDDY.

RIGHT, PAULA.

HEY, LET'S FACE IT. ALL
FOUR OF US ARE LUCKY.

- YEAH.
- LOOK.

LET'S THE FOUR OF
US LATER GO ON OUT

AND PAINT CINCINNATI RED.

COME ON, WE'LL BURN
THIS TOWN OF THE GROUND

THEY'LL NEVER
KNOW WHAT HIT THEM.

HONEY, HONEY. NOW
BEFORE WE MAKE ANY PLANS,

- I JUST HAVE ONE REQUEST.
- OH, SURE, SUGGY.

WELL, I'D LIKE A FEW
MOMENTS ALONE WITH JOHNNY.

WELL, SURE, BABY.

I'LL SEE YOU BACK AT THE HOTEL.

OKAY. THANKS, LOVER.

- JOHN.
- BUDDY.

AH! YOU CRAZY, COME HERE!

HEY, YOU, LOOKIN' FORWARD

TO SPENDING A LOT MORE TIME
WITH YOU NEXT TIME, BUDDY.

EH, AND... SAY GOODBYE
TO JENNIFER FOR ME.

AND LISTEN... YOU HAVE
A NICE TIME IN JAMAICA.

- YOU SLY SUCKER.
- BUDDY.

GOOD LUCK, BUDDY.

WELL, AH, GEE,

I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO SAY, PAULA.

I MEAN... HE, HE'S JUST
ONE HELL OF A GUY.

YES, HE IS.

JENNIFER SEEMS
NICE. IS IT SERIOUS?

NO.

WHY BRING HER ALONG, THEN?

WELL, I JUST THOUGHT
YOU MIGHT ENJOY

MEETING SOME
PEOPLE I HARDLY KNOW.

I'M BASICALLY LONELY.

BEING SINGLE IS TOUGH.

YOU'RE TELLING ME.

I'M SORRY.

WELL, THEY LEFT JUST
IN TIME. MORE FOR US.

ISN'T THAT CHAMP? I MEAN...

AH, THERE'LL JUST BE
THE TWO OF US. JUST TWO.

SPECIAL.

THANK YOU.

WELL, UH...

HERE'S TO YOU...
AND HERE'S TO BUDDY.

AND HERE'S TO MARRIAGE.

WHY'RE YOU PITCHING
THIS MARRIAGE SO HARD?

YOU REALLY LIKE HIM?

BUDDY? HE'S GREAT.

OH, YOU WOULDN'T CARE

IF I WERE MARRYING
HITLER, WOULD YOU?

COME ON.

YOU WANNA GET
OUT OF THE ALIMONY.

HOW CAN YOU SAY THAT?

OH, TELL THE TRUTH.

I AM TELLING THE TRUTH.

NOW HE'S BEEN MARRIED BEFORE.

GREAT. IT SEEMS
TO AGREE WITH HIM.

BUT HE LOOKS AT OTHER WOMEN.

OH, EVERYBODY DOES.

OH, HE'S KILLED SOME PEOPLE.

HOW MANY?

YOU CAN'T BE STRAIGHT
WITH ME? CAN YOU?

NO, IT TAKES TOO MUCH PRACTICE.

YOU'RE JEALOUS, AREN'T YOU?

JEALOUS OF BUDDY?

YES. OH, I CAN SEE
IT IN YOUR FACE.

HE'S MADE SOMETHING OF HIMSELF.

HE BUILT THAT CHARTER
SERVICE FROM SCRATCH.

HE LOVES ME. HE LOVES LAURIE.

HE WANTS TO MARRY ME.

ADMIT IT. IT BOTHERS YOU.

THAT'S NOT WHAT
BOTHERS ME ABOUT BUDDY.

WHAT DOES?

WELL, HE IS GOOFY.

HE IS GOOFY.

YOU GOT SOME NERVE.

AFTER 12 YEARS OF BEING A
RESPONSIBLE SINGLE PARENT

I NEED A LOT OF GOOFY.

AND HE MAKES ME LAUGH.

LOOK PAULA, I LIKE THE GUY.

I DON'T KNOW IF IT
WILL WORK OR NOT.

YOU'RE THE ONE WHO
IS TAKING THE CHANCE.

I JUST DON'T WANT TO SEE YOU
MAKE THE SAME MISTAKE WITH HIM

THAT YOU MADE WITH ME.

YOU DON'T LIKE HIM, DO YOU?

I AM NOT TALKING ABOUT BUDDY.

I AM TALKING ABOUT YOU.

WHAT YOU WANT? WHAT YOU DESERVE?

PAULA, YOU'RE AN INCREDIBLE,
EXTRAORDINARY WOMAN.

YOU GOT A GREAT MIND
AND GREAT LEGS AND...

WELL, I DON'T THINK YOU
SHOULD MARRY SOMEBODY

JUST BECAUSE THEY
WANNA MARRY YOU.

MAYBE YOU'RE RIGHT.

YEAH, I AM RIGHT.

MAYBE WE SHOULD
JUST LIVE TOGETHER.

WELL, MAYBE YOU
SHOULD. SEE HOW IT GOES.

YOU'D STILL HAVE TO PAY ALIMONY.

MAYBE I AM WRONG.

OH!

OH, I AM SERIOUSLY CONFUSED.

YEAH, I AM TOO PROBABLY.

I... I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU WANT.

I AM TRYING TO GIVE YOU
THE STRAIGHTEST ADVICE I CAN.

I DON'T WANT ADVICE FROM YOU.

WELL, WHAT DO YOU WANT?

WELL I'LL TELL YOU
WHAT I DON'T WANT.

I DON'T WANT TO SEE
MY FORMER HUSBAND

DROOLING OVER THE
PROSPECT OF MY REMARRYING.

WELL, WHY DIDN'T
YOU JUST SAY SO?

WELL, I DIDN'T
KNOW IT UNTIL NOW.

AND I GUESS I'D LIKE
YOU TO FEEL A LITTLE SAD.

I AM A LITTLE SAD.

HE'S GREAT IN BED.

I SAID I'M SAD.

I AM TOO.

SO HERE WE ARE.
SAD IN CINCINNATI.

WELL... I WANTED YOU
AND BUDDY TO MEET.

AND I NEEDED TO KNOW
IT WAS OVER BETWEEN US.

IT'S OVER.

I KNOW.

FLY UP YOU SOLO JET.

WALK YOU BACK TO THE HOTEL?

NO.

FINISH YOUR CHAMPAGNE.

BUT I BETTER GO.

BUDDY, GETS A LITTLE GOOFY

IF HE'S LEFT ALONE FOR A WHILE.

UH-OH, I'LL BET.

JOHNNY, I AM GONNA MARRY HIM.

CONGRATULATIONS.

YOU GONNA HANG ON
FOR A COUPLE OF DAYS,

HAVE A LITTLE FLING
BEFORE YOU TIE THE KNOT.

OH, THAT'S PERFECT.

THANK YOU FOR THAT.

GOODBYE.

WELL, THANK YOU.

FOR WHAT?

FOR LAURIE.

YOU DID RAISE OUR
DAUGHTER YOURSELF.

I WASN'T THERE. I
CHOSE NOT TO BE THERE,

YOU DID THE JOB OF TWO PEOPLE.

YOU DID IT VERY WELL.
I'M PROUD OF HER.

AND I'M... I'M REALLY
PROUD OF YOU.

TO YOU?

OH!

TELL YOU WHAT SWEETHEART,

I WANT YOU TO BRING
ME ANOTHER OF THESE.

MAKE IT A DOUBLE.

TARLEK, IF THIS IS YOUR
IDEA OF A SECOND CHOICE

PREPARE TO DIE.

OH, THESE ARE TICKETS.

UH, YES, AND NO.

OH, JOHNNY.

OH... IF THIS IS YOUR IDEA OF
A DREAM VACATION FOR TWO

YOU'RE A VERY SILLY BOY.

BAILEY, IT'S NOT TOO LATE.

WE CAN CHANGE THE TICKETS.
WE CAN GO SOMEWHERE ELSE.

WELL, YOU CERTAINLY
CAN BUT FOR ME...

I AM GOING HOME TO MY FOLKS.

WELL, WHAT I AM SUPPOSED
TO DO WITH THE EXTRA TICKET.

OH... NEBRASKA!

I'D LOVE TO GO OMAHA.

IT'S ONE OF OUR NATION'S
LEADING PORK PACKING CENTERS.

A TERRAIN THERE IS SO LEVEL.

SO FLAT, SO RELAXING.

I'VE OFTEN FANTASIZED
ABOUT GOING THERE.

IT'D BE LIKE A DREAM COME TRUE.

OH, TAKE ME JOHN. TAKE ME!