Vagrant Queen (2020–…): Season 1, Episode 2 - Yippee Ki Yay - full transcript
The team is forced to stop for repairs, but the cannibals who reside there have other plans.
That is how
you landed a chosen...
by maually able to writing
the lateral landing...
You are making it more
complicated than it needs to be.
Autopilot always
worked fine for me.
You do know autopilot
is an assist,
it's not meant
to replace piloting.
- Duh!
- This is exactly why
she's in the shape she is now.
Amae, how long 'til
we're ready to leave?
I need a few hours.
Mostly to remove
all the duct tape.
Where the hell is here?
Greibos.
A rainforest-turned-dumping
ground after the Narrows War.
Species had
no choice but to adapt.
Aw.
That's sad.
So, how can I help?
We do need gas.
Badly.
I got a reading on some old
ships and tankers nearby.
Copy.
Um, it'll take the two of you
to siphon off from
one of those tankers.
Just like old times.
Oh, before you go!
I found your comms bands
in the electrics rooms.
We can use them
to stay in touch.
Thought these were broken.
- No, they just needed a charge.
- Thank you.
I know you risked
a lot leaving Xija with us,
and once we're off this planet,
I promise we're gonna
get you to Station Enthree.
I can't have
more blood on my hands.
Yep. Haven't forgotten
since the last time you told me.
She can be
a little dramatic at first.
- She livens up?
- Oh, totally.
Show her pictures from
Earth kittens, she's goop.
You ready, numbnut?
Earth... kit-ten.
Oh, my crackers!
Oh, that's so silly.
So, you gonna
tell me where my mother is?
Yeah, of course.
Let's just get
out of here first.
Not exactly the sort of place
I want to be left stranded.
Again.
Ohh, look at this little cutie!
That is adorable.
Picking up
signals of hydrocarbon about...
ten clicks west.
♪ Hey ♪
♪ Hey ♪
*VAGRANT QUEEN*
Season 02 Episode 01
Episode Title: "Yippee Ki Yay"
Aired on: April 03, 2020
Thirty-five.
That's how many of you
I dispatched into Xija Station
to find one tiny, little girl.
And you failed because...?
Sir, she had help.
A human!
And a puny mechanic.
Against the Republic's
best army.
What do we have on them?
Human drifter.
No known affiliations.
We picked him up
a few weeks back.
Claimed he had information
to lead to Al-Feyr.
Most of it was useless,
but we kept an eye on him.
Eventually led us to Xija.
- And the mechanic?
- Amae Rali.
Orphan drifter from
the planet Lorkis.
The planet was destroyed
15 years ago.
Such interesting specimens
you've chosen, Eldaya.
Reminds me of that time
we had to steal
Kruglean stones out of Crovax.
You see that?
All right.
So the fuel tank
should be around here somewhere.
Aha, okay. So Amae said
one of us has to
siphon from the inside
and the other
collects the fuel out of here.
Yeah, I'm gonna collect out
here, I'm sensitive to mould.
I'm sensitive to bullshit.
You ready, Isaac?
I'm always ready!
We good?
Isaac?
Issac!
Issac?
Isaac?!
Thanks.
Asshole.
- Thanks.
- Yeah, no problem.
Us scavs gotta have
each other's backs, right?
That's not usually how it works.
It looks like
you had a good sale today.
I'm actually gonna meet with
a bunch of Spiders right now.
- Sell 'em this thing.
- Word of warning:
Spiders are notorious
for under-cutting.
Thanks for the heads-up.
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!
Hold on!
Now this wasn't
part of the deal.
You can't just take me.
I thought I was
signing over the orb thingy.
'Kay, this is fraud!
I'm a lawyer, dammit.
Shit.
Hey!
Leftover siltanium...
For cheap. Interested?
Hell, yeah. That stuff's
damn hard to come by.
What do you want for it?
- That.
- That is a great deal.
Sorry, darling,
the captain's taken a liking.
Wants to make a new
jacket with his skin.
Not my style if you ask me,
but hey,
what do I know about fashion?
What'd he just
say about my skin?
Can't take
a look at this rare find?
See, I know you're
just doing your job.
And I really don't want to
hurt you, so you give him to me,
you take the siltanium,
we call it a day.
That is really cute.
And even if it were
remotely threatening,
you're on club property.
House rules.
No scavving or stealing here.
Very true. But...
you just passed house lines
about three feet back.
House rules.
Behind the line.
Behind the house line.
Wow! Where did you
learn to fight like that?
Raised by scavengers.
Learn to fight or learn to die.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Grew up in Canada.
Survival was just as brutal.
That's on Earth, by the way.
Kind of a long story.
Anyway, I was catapulted
to this side of the universe
two years ago and I've been
trying to get home ever since.
That actually
wasn't a long story.
They'll be waking up pretty
pissed soon, so you got a ship?
Oh, yeah, she's a beauty.
She's parked right over here.
But there might be
a slight issue with that.
Look, on top of saving my life,
I'll need one more favour.
Isaac!
Really? Dead battery?
You gotta be kidding.
Come on...
Come on!
Ah!
Love that sound.
Wait!
I'm looking for someone.
In Beader territory?
Good luck.
Charging station this way
if you wanna reload,
but I'd get outta here soon.
Place will be
swarming again in no time.
Xija territories fall well
outside the Republic sectors.
You are to leave immediately.
The last of a tyrannical
bloodline was spotted here.
We are close.
This is awkward.
We've heard that so
many times now, Lazaro.
Look, an ex-Marquis
failing multiple times to catch
one teeny-tiny little queen.
You are aware, Admiral,
that title was abandoned
long before
the Aristocracy was abolished.
Long before I stormed
the castle while you all
watched on comfortably.
Is... is that a dig?
Oh, you're
to send the Thunderer
back here to Arriopa,
where you'll be reassigned...
- No.
- - Lazaro.
- The queen is not yet...
- Dead, yes.
Yes, yes, yes.
We're all very aware.
But you're wasting
too many resources.
You failed.
Return to Arriopa.
Of course, Admiral.
We set course
for Arriopa immediately.
Oh.
Okay, then.
Well, we'll, uh...
Shall I set
course for Arriopa, sir?
No.
Not yet.
Is he awake?
Yes, sir.
Good.
Ouch, bro.
You've looked better.
Punks will regret the
day they ever messed with Xija.
Find somewhere
to lay low for a while.
I'm sure you've got booty calls
all over the galaxy, right?
Funny.
- Where's Elida?
- She's out for supplies.
- Don't get carried away.
- What's that supposed to mean?
Elida's on her own path,
Amae, and it's a dangerous one.
We only got this far
by playing it smart.
So just go and find
somewhere safe and I'll...
Chaz?
Chaz, you're breaking up.
No!
No, no, no, no, no,
no, no, no, no, no, no.
I finally got those
breaker cables organized.
Oh. Oh, oh, hold on.
Are you kidding me?
These guys need
a lesson in productivity.
Ah!
Oh my...
Really? Ah!
Oh, gosh! Ah!
Please work.
Call Elida.
Call Isaac.
Where's the station?
Thanks for all the help, Gladys.
Not what I'm paid for.
Bob.
Oh, Bob.
He just celebrated
his 20th wedding anniversary.
I'm really gonna miss you,
you son of a hubglubon.
Now, let's take a look
at our newest challenger.
And by the way,
welcome to Greibos.
So, uh, where you from?
Look, I got things to do.
Try not to sell
yourself to pirates again.
You're a lone wolf, I get it.
Me too.
I just need one tiny favour.
My ship is currently
being impounded and I, you know,
I thought maybe
you could use your...
I am not on good terms
with the parking authority.
Good luck.
Okay, wait,
wait, wait, wait, wait.
We can help each other out.
I see you're headed
to the Preyhound shuttle.
I mean, public transport?
Come on.
You need a real ride.
And I got a Troezan S900.
- So you're offering me a ship?
- Seventy-thirty.
You know,
we take turns piloting,
we hit up the occasional
scav joint,
maybe we share
the occasional whisky.
No funny business.
I'm a married man.
Who's your partner?
She's back on Earth. Look.
You are ridiculously badass,
and I'm, well, more personable.
Pretty great team,
if you ask me.
- Fifty-fifty.
- Sixty-forty.
Okay, okay, okay.
Fifty-fifty.
You racked up this much
in unpaid parking tickets?
It is legit hard to understand
parking regulations in space.
I shoulda asked for
more than fifty-fifty.
Gonna wake up with
a killer headache, buddy.
But you'll be fine.
Welcome... to your new home.
Thatta girl.
And away... We... go...
I have a plan.
Take the wheel.
I learned this from one
of Earth's most sacred tales.
I call it, yipee ki yay!
Yes, yes!
Whoa!
Yipee ki yay.
Good move.
Hey, sleepyhead.
Isaac?
What?
Where are we?
Let's get outta here.
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
I learnt the hard way.
These bars... are wired.
Shit.
Again, where are we?
Please,
take your seats
and sharpen your knives.
The next battle
commences in five.
Slowly does it.
Become one with the land.
I am a mossy junk creature.
This is my home.
And I definitely
do not mind the smell.
Okay.
All right,
so we're locked up by cannibals
who will determine through some
sort of battle who they'll eat?
- Are they cannibals?
- What?
I mean, cannibals eat
their own species, right?
And we are not, well,
whatever they are, so...
would you still call them that?
Well, the guys who dragged
me here ate their friend.
- Okay, was it the same spec...
- Yes.
I'm just checking.
You know, instead of arguing
with me about the semantics
of cannibalism,
how about, I don't know,
you help
me figure out how to get out.
We've mostly been communicating
through these lovely drawings.
- Wow.
- I know, he's good, right?
What... what is that?
It is, uh,
best not to think about that.
Let me get you one.
Hey, robot maid!
Ooh, what do we have here?
I imagine we are in a Hansel
and Gretal type situation.
It tastes better
than it looks.
El, do you maybe wanna talk
about what happened on Varook?
- No.
- You know, I didn't want it
- to go down that way.
- What part?
The shooting me part
or being a selfish asshole part?
I- - I was being selfish?
What are you, kidding me?
- I trusted you and...
- And I trusted you!
Do you have any idea
how hard that was for me?
So, I had money down
on the other guy, right?
Looked like he had
a decent set of fights in him.
- But, man, he sucked.
- Hey!
Hey! Hey, hey!
Take us. We're ready.
You're up in two blocks,
but one might say
you're hungry for battle.
Yep. Never gets old.
No, no, no, no.
It's okay, it's okay.
Amae is on her way.
I'm sure she is, I'm sure...
Yeah, yeah, I considered that,
but given the situation, mm...
taking off in your own ship,
saving two randos
that you just met...
I know what I would bet on.
Yeah, well not
everybody thinks like you.
Like us.
Who're you kidding?
So you know with this sale, we
can afford one of these updates?
- Hmm?
- Mm-hmm.
You know what that means?
One step closer to Earth.
Oh, you are gonna love it there.
Alright,
I'm gonna go prep Winnie.
Get my leftovers.
Keep the change.
Interesting company
you're keeping there.
You wanna be careful.
Oh, yeah?
'Cause she'll kick your ass.
You've no idea, do you?
Dude, really?
You forgot my food?
Two years.
You have been lying to me
for two frickin' years.
Uh, some clarification?
You're a goddamn queen.
Uh, that.
Yeah, it's not really
something I advertise.
It says here
you're from Arriopa.
So that means
your poor scav family
are actually
rich frickin' royals?
You don't know anything, Isaac.
Because you didn't tell me.
I've... I've been hiding
since I was ten years old.
- It's all I know.
- I thought we were friends, El.
We are.
- It's just complicated.
- Yeah, tell me about it.
I just had to a pay a dude
my cut to keep his mouth shut.
Then it sounds like
a pretty good time
to get off this shitty planet.
Let's go.
We have been scavving
together for two years.
Everything that we have been
through together,
barely scraping by.
Okay, look, I... I
understand you're pissed, Isaac,
but let's chat on the ship.
Let's go.
No, I mean,
this whole time we coulda
used this to make a ton of cash.
No more scrounging.
So...
I thought this
was about our friendship,
- but this is about money?
- Think about it.
These Republic pricks, we take
them for everything they've got.
We stage sightings,
we sell info, nothing dangerous.
We are living like vultures,
when we could be like kings.
Like queens!
You wanna know the first
lesson I was taught as queen?
How to wave?
That I can never have friends.
Goodbye, Isaac.
Hell, no.
Not on my ship.
Oof!
Are you kidding me?
You'd leave me here stranded
after everything
I've done for you?
Elida!
Ah...
Kinda like root-beer, with,
like, a earthy kale aftertaste.
El, you know
I wasn't aiming for ya.
I just wanted to
stop you from leaving.
We both know I got terrible aim;
even if I was tryna hit you,
I woulda been ten feet off.
You want to make it up to me?
Tell me where my mother is.
I am.
I will.
Look, I tell you everything now,
how do I know you just
won't leave me stranded again?
Given the current situation,
one that we might not
make it out of alive,
I'd say it's a pretty good time
- for you to just...
- Guys.
Guys.
Amae?
- And you rolled here?
- It's called blending in.
You know,
getting into character.
Okay, there's
a key at the end.
On it.
Told you she'd come.
Ohh my crackers!
It's an S82K!
I haven't seen one of
these in over a decade.
This is a highly advanced
AI pairing system and...
- Look what they've done to you.
- Am-Amae?
- A glorified drinks cart.
- Amae!
- Not the best time.
- Right.
Okay.
- Ah... What's your cell?
- Uh...
Hey, what cell number are we?
Seven.
I can clearly see
you're number seven.
We're number three.
I thought it was
serendipitous when I arrived.
- That's my favourite number.
- We're number three!
Three.
Got it. Ugh, gross.
Oh. Uh... uh...
Oh, uh, uh...
You're big.
Oh.
No!
Whoa.
Take this to cell three.
Oh, shit!
Ah!
- Ah!
- Oh, God.
This is painful to watch.
Oh, really?
Ah!
Crackers.
How about some fruit punch?
It's probably not fruit, though.
What?
Imagine that it is.
You want your one-liners
to be a little more organic.
Can't forget about these?
- Let's go!
- Let's go.
Ah!
- Whoo-hoo-hoo!
- It's this way back.
I saw a bunch of guards
on the north...
- Yeah, we go south.
- What?
This way, this way!
That's not what I meant.
- No time for a plan now.
- Wait, we should really...
There's always time for a plan!
Really?
You're a Tuk
from planet Achuun?
So far from the star colonies
controlled by the monarchy.
Why the allegiance?
Nim thinks...
what the Republic did...
was nasty.
You call yourselves
revolutionaries.
But Nim thinks
you're just bullies.
I'm... I'm sure you've been told
wretched things about us, but,
you know, you've been misled.
We're a people's government.
Liberators.
The people that you
worship blindly oppress.
They value
a bloodline without merit.
But you... Nim.
You have a chance
to redeem yourself.
Nim will tell you nothing.
There is no honour
in dying for a misguided cause.
Six o'clock!
Six, what...
How about just behind you?
It's a pretty universal way
of explaining directions.
Can you guys
pipe down for, like,
- a second so we can make a plan?
- That's not really how we roll.
We're more the
shoot-your-way-out-type.
Let's go east.
When I surveilled the area,
no Greibosians
would head this way.
It doesn't feel right.
That's because there's just
a bunch of
mutant chimp-dogs this way.
We have a better
chance of taking them on.
- Isaac, gimme your gun.
- What, why?!
Because
I'm a better shot than you.
That's weird.
They're staying back.
- Gimme the gun!
- Who took out
50 attackers on Carillo
just with one gun?
They were Kleothian worms
and they didn't have limbs!
- Well, they had teeth! - Guys!
- Something is in... -
You're
selling information on
the last queen of Arriopa.
Well, I'll tell you
what I told the Admiralty.
But it'll cost ya.
All right.
We used to hit up this
joint called Glubs on Wreckoor
all the time.
She goes back there
once every two moons.
She's piloting a star freighter
by the name Regina.
Reg-eena.
No,
it is most definitely Regina.
There's a steakhouse on
Crovax she loves, try that.
Give us a moment.
Toodles.
A steakhouse?
She's been a
vegetarian her whole life.
Yeah, but she's had cheat days.
What, you don't believe
that I know her?
No, I believe you know her,
I believe you don't
want to sell her out.
You care about her.
The Admiralty will kill her
as soon as they find her,
you know that.
We're here to protect her.
We're her family.
She's got no family.
We're done here.
That brooch you hold?
It's her mother's.
You would trade
her dead mother's broach?
Pot calling
the kettle black much?
She believes her mother is dead?
What? What are you saying?
She's alive.
In prison, on planet Wix
in the Republic Space.
Yeah, I...
I don't want that.
Keep it.
If you ever do see her again.
We escaped Xija,
infested with Admiralty.
I... I mean,
what happened just now
should not have been
a difficult situation.
We had guns.
I had a way out.
But neither of you listened.
My brother
would be so mad at me.
He's had my back
since we were kids.
And he's tried to keep me
out of trouble ever since.
So...
why'd you come after us?
Because everyone needs
someone to have their back.
And it doesn't sound
like you two have each other's.
I mean, we used to.
She's on planet Wix, El.
Your mother.
That's all
the guard told me, I swear.
And I've been a shitty friend.
And selfish.
And I never even asked
why you were trying to hide.
I'm sorry, El.
I wanna make it right.
Time for the battle.
Ha, ha, ha!
Yes,
Allow me to introduce to you
the final battle of the evening!
What the hell
kind of battle is this?
I hope you left
some room for dessert.
Because both items on the menu
look positively delicious.
They want us to cook Peter.
- Aw, that's his name?
- I don't know.
He answered to it once
so it just kinda stuck.
No weapons, hand-to-hand combat?
Now you all know the rules.
The winner lives
to face another day
while the loser
becomes barbecue chew-flé!
And tonight, we have something
really special for you all.
A little number composed from
the fleshy one's
home planet... Earf!
Am I saying that correctly?
- Earf?
- Huh.
Earf!
Now, let the best meal... lose.
Take it away.
What is happening?
Oh my God.
It's karaoke.
♪ Looking in your eyes
I can see a paradise ♪
Aw.
♪ This world that I've found
is too good to be true ♪
Seriously,
of all Earth's tracks?
Now, sing!
♪ This love in my heart
that I'm feeling for you ♪
Boo!
♪ Crazy,
I don't care about that ♪
- ♪ Put your hand in my ♪
- Bye-bye!
- Ah!
- Do you think
that means we're losing?
- ♪ That the world around us... ♪
- What the shit is this?
♪ Baby we can make it
if we're heart to heart ♪
Good one.
♪ And we can build
this thing together ♪
♪ Stand the stormy weather ♪
♪ Nothing's gonna stop us now ♪
Keep it going,
keep it going, more!
♪ ... world runs out of lovers
We'll still have each other ♪
♪ Nothing's gonna stop us ♪
♪ Nothing's gonna
stop us now ♪
♪ I'm glad I found you ♪
♪ Whatever it takes ♪
Maybe we should
help a bunny out.
Make it stop!
♪ They say I'm crazy,
what do they know ♪
♪ Put your arms around me, baby
don't ever let go ♪
- Ugh.
- Looks like we have a winner...
...for dinner.
Dessert is served.
Now.
Yippee ki yay.
- Bye-bye!
- Brace yourself.
♪ And we can build
this thing together ♪
♪ Standing strong forever ♪
- Stop them!
- ♪ Nothing's gonna stop us ♪
♪ Nothing's gonna stop us ♪
♪ Ooh ♪
♪ All that I need is you ♪
♪ All that I ever need ♪
♪ All that I want to do ♪
♪ Is hold you forever,
ever and ever ♪
What's going on?
This wasn't part of the plan!
Stop them!
Ah! Do something!
Guy that pays me just got his
brains blown out, so, uh, nah.
So what do you reckon, Amae?
We go west?
It's a great plan.
Let's go, let's go, let's go!
- Go, I'll catch up!
- Sounds good!
Really?
Are you kidding me?
You piece of...
Oh,
you thought that I was gonna...?
That's awkward.
Amae.
Take her away.
Fifteen years ago...
I promised to kill a measly
ten-year-old queen.
Last of a tyrannical bloodline.
I mean, I should've been offered
a seat at the Admirals' table.
But...
...she escaped.
I mean, you know
how exhausting it's been?
The life she's
forced me to lead?
I've become
a joke to the Republic.
A mockery.
Do I seem like a joke to you?
Because you've
been wasting my time!
Well, now that's a shame.
That sort of loyalty
would've been rewarded,
were you
on the right side of history.
Oh!
You went back for this?
Yeah, it's not a big deal.
You said it might come
in handy around the ship, so...
Yeah.
It's pretty cool.
You're gonna hook her up for us
before we drop you off
at the next station?
- I'm coming with you.
- What?
To Wix.
To get your mom.
Hey, look, I...
I can't have more...
Blood on my hands,
yeah, you said.
Thing is, the two of you won't
last five minutes without me.
I've seen blood, war, pain.
More than you understand.
Like you, I've spent
my life just surviving.
Yeah, but it's not your fight.
Imagine if
everyone thought that.
It would be a pretty
schlucky universe.
Excuse my language.
We'll, um...
make up a room for you.
Do you think she'd be okay if
I labelled our bathroom shelves?
Knock yourself out.
Okay. Let's go.
I don't see them
showing up on the planet now.
Huh.
Must've just missed them.
Oh. They're approaching Qualla.
Oh. We won't fail.
Again.
You guys looking for
a good time?
Well, it's been
a tough couple of days.
That sounds like
a really lovely...
No, thank you.
Not the sort of
good time you're looking for.
Oh. Thanks, anyways.
What's the problem?
We'll get the next ones.
♪ Hey ♪
♪ Hey ♪
♪ Hey ♪
♪ Hey ♪
you landed a chosen...
by maually able to writing
the lateral landing...
You are making it more
complicated than it needs to be.
Autopilot always
worked fine for me.
You do know autopilot
is an assist,
it's not meant
to replace piloting.
- Duh!
- This is exactly why
she's in the shape she is now.
Amae, how long 'til
we're ready to leave?
I need a few hours.
Mostly to remove
all the duct tape.
Where the hell is here?
Greibos.
A rainforest-turned-dumping
ground after the Narrows War.
Species had
no choice but to adapt.
Aw.
That's sad.
So, how can I help?
We do need gas.
Badly.
I got a reading on some old
ships and tankers nearby.
Copy.
Um, it'll take the two of you
to siphon off from
one of those tankers.
Just like old times.
Oh, before you go!
I found your comms bands
in the electrics rooms.
We can use them
to stay in touch.
Thought these were broken.
- No, they just needed a charge.
- Thank you.
I know you risked
a lot leaving Xija with us,
and once we're off this planet,
I promise we're gonna
get you to Station Enthree.
I can't have
more blood on my hands.
Yep. Haven't forgotten
since the last time you told me.
She can be
a little dramatic at first.
- She livens up?
- Oh, totally.
Show her pictures from
Earth kittens, she's goop.
You ready, numbnut?
Earth... kit-ten.
Oh, my crackers!
Oh, that's so silly.
So, you gonna
tell me where my mother is?
Yeah, of course.
Let's just get
out of here first.
Not exactly the sort of place
I want to be left stranded.
Again.
Ohh, look at this little cutie!
That is adorable.
Picking up
signals of hydrocarbon about...
ten clicks west.
♪ Hey ♪
♪ Hey ♪
*VAGRANT QUEEN*
Season 02 Episode 01
Episode Title: "Yippee Ki Yay"
Aired on: April 03, 2020
Thirty-five.
That's how many of you
I dispatched into Xija Station
to find one tiny, little girl.
And you failed because...?
Sir, she had help.
A human!
And a puny mechanic.
Against the Republic's
best army.
What do we have on them?
Human drifter.
No known affiliations.
We picked him up
a few weeks back.
Claimed he had information
to lead to Al-Feyr.
Most of it was useless,
but we kept an eye on him.
Eventually led us to Xija.
- And the mechanic?
- Amae Rali.
Orphan drifter from
the planet Lorkis.
The planet was destroyed
15 years ago.
Such interesting specimens
you've chosen, Eldaya.
Reminds me of that time
we had to steal
Kruglean stones out of Crovax.
You see that?
All right.
So the fuel tank
should be around here somewhere.
Aha, okay. So Amae said
one of us has to
siphon from the inside
and the other
collects the fuel out of here.
Yeah, I'm gonna collect out
here, I'm sensitive to mould.
I'm sensitive to bullshit.
You ready, Isaac?
I'm always ready!
We good?
Isaac?
Issac!
Issac?
Isaac?!
Thanks.
Asshole.
- Thanks.
- Yeah, no problem.
Us scavs gotta have
each other's backs, right?
That's not usually how it works.
It looks like
you had a good sale today.
I'm actually gonna meet with
a bunch of Spiders right now.
- Sell 'em this thing.
- Word of warning:
Spiders are notorious
for under-cutting.
Thanks for the heads-up.
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!
Hold on!
Now this wasn't
part of the deal.
You can't just take me.
I thought I was
signing over the orb thingy.
'Kay, this is fraud!
I'm a lawyer, dammit.
Shit.
Hey!
Leftover siltanium...
For cheap. Interested?
Hell, yeah. That stuff's
damn hard to come by.
What do you want for it?
- That.
- That is a great deal.
Sorry, darling,
the captain's taken a liking.
Wants to make a new
jacket with his skin.
Not my style if you ask me,
but hey,
what do I know about fashion?
What'd he just
say about my skin?
Can't take
a look at this rare find?
See, I know you're
just doing your job.
And I really don't want to
hurt you, so you give him to me,
you take the siltanium,
we call it a day.
That is really cute.
And even if it were
remotely threatening,
you're on club property.
House rules.
No scavving or stealing here.
Very true. But...
you just passed house lines
about three feet back.
House rules.
Behind the line.
Behind the house line.
Wow! Where did you
learn to fight like that?
Raised by scavengers.
Learn to fight or learn to die.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Grew up in Canada.
Survival was just as brutal.
That's on Earth, by the way.
Kind of a long story.
Anyway, I was catapulted
to this side of the universe
two years ago and I've been
trying to get home ever since.
That actually
wasn't a long story.
They'll be waking up pretty
pissed soon, so you got a ship?
Oh, yeah, she's a beauty.
She's parked right over here.
But there might be
a slight issue with that.
Look, on top of saving my life,
I'll need one more favour.
Isaac!
Really? Dead battery?
You gotta be kidding.
Come on...
Come on!
Ah!
Love that sound.
Wait!
I'm looking for someone.
In Beader territory?
Good luck.
Charging station this way
if you wanna reload,
but I'd get outta here soon.
Place will be
swarming again in no time.
Xija territories fall well
outside the Republic sectors.
You are to leave immediately.
The last of a tyrannical
bloodline was spotted here.
We are close.
This is awkward.
We've heard that so
many times now, Lazaro.
Look, an ex-Marquis
failing multiple times to catch
one teeny-tiny little queen.
You are aware, Admiral,
that title was abandoned
long before
the Aristocracy was abolished.
Long before I stormed
the castle while you all
watched on comfortably.
Is... is that a dig?
Oh, you're
to send the Thunderer
back here to Arriopa,
where you'll be reassigned...
- No.
- - Lazaro.
- The queen is not yet...
- Dead, yes.
Yes, yes, yes.
We're all very aware.
But you're wasting
too many resources.
You failed.
Return to Arriopa.
Of course, Admiral.
We set course
for Arriopa immediately.
Oh.
Okay, then.
Well, we'll, uh...
Shall I set
course for Arriopa, sir?
No.
Not yet.
Is he awake?
Yes, sir.
Good.
Ouch, bro.
You've looked better.
Punks will regret the
day they ever messed with Xija.
Find somewhere
to lay low for a while.
I'm sure you've got booty calls
all over the galaxy, right?
Funny.
- Where's Elida?
- She's out for supplies.
- Don't get carried away.
- What's that supposed to mean?
Elida's on her own path,
Amae, and it's a dangerous one.
We only got this far
by playing it smart.
So just go and find
somewhere safe and I'll...
Chaz?
Chaz, you're breaking up.
No!
No, no, no, no, no,
no, no, no, no, no, no.
I finally got those
breaker cables organized.
Oh. Oh, oh, hold on.
Are you kidding me?
These guys need
a lesson in productivity.
Ah!
Oh my...
Really? Ah!
Oh, gosh! Ah!
Please work.
Call Elida.
Call Isaac.
Where's the station?
Thanks for all the help, Gladys.
Not what I'm paid for.
Bob.
Oh, Bob.
He just celebrated
his 20th wedding anniversary.
I'm really gonna miss you,
you son of a hubglubon.
Now, let's take a look
at our newest challenger.
And by the way,
welcome to Greibos.
So, uh, where you from?
Look, I got things to do.
Try not to sell
yourself to pirates again.
You're a lone wolf, I get it.
Me too.
I just need one tiny favour.
My ship is currently
being impounded and I, you know,
I thought maybe
you could use your...
I am not on good terms
with the parking authority.
Good luck.
Okay, wait,
wait, wait, wait, wait.
We can help each other out.
I see you're headed
to the Preyhound shuttle.
I mean, public transport?
Come on.
You need a real ride.
And I got a Troezan S900.
- So you're offering me a ship?
- Seventy-thirty.
You know,
we take turns piloting,
we hit up the occasional
scav joint,
maybe we share
the occasional whisky.
No funny business.
I'm a married man.
Who's your partner?
She's back on Earth. Look.
You are ridiculously badass,
and I'm, well, more personable.
Pretty great team,
if you ask me.
- Fifty-fifty.
- Sixty-forty.
Okay, okay, okay.
Fifty-fifty.
You racked up this much
in unpaid parking tickets?
It is legit hard to understand
parking regulations in space.
I shoulda asked for
more than fifty-fifty.
Gonna wake up with
a killer headache, buddy.
But you'll be fine.
Welcome... to your new home.
Thatta girl.
And away... We... go...
I have a plan.
Take the wheel.
I learned this from one
of Earth's most sacred tales.
I call it, yipee ki yay!
Yes, yes!
Whoa!
Yipee ki yay.
Good move.
Hey, sleepyhead.
Isaac?
What?
Where are we?
Let's get outta here.
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
I learnt the hard way.
These bars... are wired.
Shit.
Again, where are we?
Please,
take your seats
and sharpen your knives.
The next battle
commences in five.
Slowly does it.
Become one with the land.
I am a mossy junk creature.
This is my home.
And I definitely
do not mind the smell.
Okay.
All right,
so we're locked up by cannibals
who will determine through some
sort of battle who they'll eat?
- Are they cannibals?
- What?
I mean, cannibals eat
their own species, right?
And we are not, well,
whatever they are, so...
would you still call them that?
Well, the guys who dragged
me here ate their friend.
- Okay, was it the same spec...
- Yes.
I'm just checking.
You know, instead of arguing
with me about the semantics
of cannibalism,
how about, I don't know,
you help
me figure out how to get out.
We've mostly been communicating
through these lovely drawings.
- Wow.
- I know, he's good, right?
What... what is that?
It is, uh,
best not to think about that.
Let me get you one.
Hey, robot maid!
Ooh, what do we have here?
I imagine we are in a Hansel
and Gretal type situation.
It tastes better
than it looks.
El, do you maybe wanna talk
about what happened on Varook?
- No.
- You know, I didn't want it
- to go down that way.
- What part?
The shooting me part
or being a selfish asshole part?
I- - I was being selfish?
What are you, kidding me?
- I trusted you and...
- And I trusted you!
Do you have any idea
how hard that was for me?
So, I had money down
on the other guy, right?
Looked like he had
a decent set of fights in him.
- But, man, he sucked.
- Hey!
Hey! Hey, hey!
Take us. We're ready.
You're up in two blocks,
but one might say
you're hungry for battle.
Yep. Never gets old.
No, no, no, no.
It's okay, it's okay.
Amae is on her way.
I'm sure she is, I'm sure...
Yeah, yeah, I considered that,
but given the situation, mm...
taking off in your own ship,
saving two randos
that you just met...
I know what I would bet on.
Yeah, well not
everybody thinks like you.
Like us.
Who're you kidding?
So you know with this sale, we
can afford one of these updates?
- Hmm?
- Mm-hmm.
You know what that means?
One step closer to Earth.
Oh, you are gonna love it there.
Alright,
I'm gonna go prep Winnie.
Get my leftovers.
Keep the change.
Interesting company
you're keeping there.
You wanna be careful.
Oh, yeah?
'Cause she'll kick your ass.
You've no idea, do you?
Dude, really?
You forgot my food?
Two years.
You have been lying to me
for two frickin' years.
Uh, some clarification?
You're a goddamn queen.
Uh, that.
Yeah, it's not really
something I advertise.
It says here
you're from Arriopa.
So that means
your poor scav family
are actually
rich frickin' royals?
You don't know anything, Isaac.
Because you didn't tell me.
I've... I've been hiding
since I was ten years old.
- It's all I know.
- I thought we were friends, El.
We are.
- It's just complicated.
- Yeah, tell me about it.
I just had to a pay a dude
my cut to keep his mouth shut.
Then it sounds like
a pretty good time
to get off this shitty planet.
Let's go.
We have been scavving
together for two years.
Everything that we have been
through together,
barely scraping by.
Okay, look, I... I
understand you're pissed, Isaac,
but let's chat on the ship.
Let's go.
No, I mean,
this whole time we coulda
used this to make a ton of cash.
No more scrounging.
So...
I thought this
was about our friendship,
- but this is about money?
- Think about it.
These Republic pricks, we take
them for everything they've got.
We stage sightings,
we sell info, nothing dangerous.
We are living like vultures,
when we could be like kings.
Like queens!
You wanna know the first
lesson I was taught as queen?
How to wave?
That I can never have friends.
Goodbye, Isaac.
Hell, no.
Not on my ship.
Oof!
Are you kidding me?
You'd leave me here stranded
after everything
I've done for you?
Elida!
Ah...
Kinda like root-beer, with,
like, a earthy kale aftertaste.
El, you know
I wasn't aiming for ya.
I just wanted to
stop you from leaving.
We both know I got terrible aim;
even if I was tryna hit you,
I woulda been ten feet off.
You want to make it up to me?
Tell me where my mother is.
I am.
I will.
Look, I tell you everything now,
how do I know you just
won't leave me stranded again?
Given the current situation,
one that we might not
make it out of alive,
I'd say it's a pretty good time
- for you to just...
- Guys.
Guys.
Amae?
- And you rolled here?
- It's called blending in.
You know,
getting into character.
Okay, there's
a key at the end.
On it.
Told you she'd come.
Ohh my crackers!
It's an S82K!
I haven't seen one of
these in over a decade.
This is a highly advanced
AI pairing system and...
- Look what they've done to you.
- Am-Amae?
- A glorified drinks cart.
- Amae!
- Not the best time.
- Right.
Okay.
- Ah... What's your cell?
- Uh...
Hey, what cell number are we?
Seven.
I can clearly see
you're number seven.
We're number three.
I thought it was
serendipitous when I arrived.
- That's my favourite number.
- We're number three!
Three.
Got it. Ugh, gross.
Oh. Uh... uh...
Oh, uh, uh...
You're big.
Oh.
No!
Whoa.
Take this to cell three.
Oh, shit!
Ah!
- Ah!
- Oh, God.
This is painful to watch.
Oh, really?
Ah!
Crackers.
How about some fruit punch?
It's probably not fruit, though.
What?
Imagine that it is.
You want your one-liners
to be a little more organic.
Can't forget about these?
- Let's go!
- Let's go.
Ah!
- Whoo-hoo-hoo!
- It's this way back.
I saw a bunch of guards
on the north...
- Yeah, we go south.
- What?
This way, this way!
That's not what I meant.
- No time for a plan now.
- Wait, we should really...
There's always time for a plan!
Really?
You're a Tuk
from planet Achuun?
So far from the star colonies
controlled by the monarchy.
Why the allegiance?
Nim thinks...
what the Republic did...
was nasty.
You call yourselves
revolutionaries.
But Nim thinks
you're just bullies.
I'm... I'm sure you've been told
wretched things about us, but,
you know, you've been misled.
We're a people's government.
Liberators.
The people that you
worship blindly oppress.
They value
a bloodline without merit.
But you... Nim.
You have a chance
to redeem yourself.
Nim will tell you nothing.
There is no honour
in dying for a misguided cause.
Six o'clock!
Six, what...
How about just behind you?
It's a pretty universal way
of explaining directions.
Can you guys
pipe down for, like,
- a second so we can make a plan?
- That's not really how we roll.
We're more the
shoot-your-way-out-type.
Let's go east.
When I surveilled the area,
no Greibosians
would head this way.
It doesn't feel right.
That's because there's just
a bunch of
mutant chimp-dogs this way.
We have a better
chance of taking them on.
- Isaac, gimme your gun.
- What, why?!
Because
I'm a better shot than you.
That's weird.
They're staying back.
- Gimme the gun!
- Who took out
50 attackers on Carillo
just with one gun?
They were Kleothian worms
and they didn't have limbs!
- Well, they had teeth! - Guys!
- Something is in... -
You're
selling information on
the last queen of Arriopa.
Well, I'll tell you
what I told the Admiralty.
But it'll cost ya.
All right.
We used to hit up this
joint called Glubs on Wreckoor
all the time.
She goes back there
once every two moons.
She's piloting a star freighter
by the name Regina.
Reg-eena.
No,
it is most definitely Regina.
There's a steakhouse on
Crovax she loves, try that.
Give us a moment.
Toodles.
A steakhouse?
She's been a
vegetarian her whole life.
Yeah, but she's had cheat days.
What, you don't believe
that I know her?
No, I believe you know her,
I believe you don't
want to sell her out.
You care about her.
The Admiralty will kill her
as soon as they find her,
you know that.
We're here to protect her.
We're her family.
She's got no family.
We're done here.
That brooch you hold?
It's her mother's.
You would trade
her dead mother's broach?
Pot calling
the kettle black much?
She believes her mother is dead?
What? What are you saying?
She's alive.
In prison, on planet Wix
in the Republic Space.
Yeah, I...
I don't want that.
Keep it.
If you ever do see her again.
We escaped Xija,
infested with Admiralty.
I... I mean,
what happened just now
should not have been
a difficult situation.
We had guns.
I had a way out.
But neither of you listened.
My brother
would be so mad at me.
He's had my back
since we were kids.
And he's tried to keep me
out of trouble ever since.
So...
why'd you come after us?
Because everyone needs
someone to have their back.
And it doesn't sound
like you two have each other's.
I mean, we used to.
She's on planet Wix, El.
Your mother.
That's all
the guard told me, I swear.
And I've been a shitty friend.
And selfish.
And I never even asked
why you were trying to hide.
I'm sorry, El.
I wanna make it right.
Time for the battle.
Ha, ha, ha!
Yes,
Allow me to introduce to you
the final battle of the evening!
What the hell
kind of battle is this?
I hope you left
some room for dessert.
Because both items on the menu
look positively delicious.
They want us to cook Peter.
- Aw, that's his name?
- I don't know.
He answered to it once
so it just kinda stuck.
No weapons, hand-to-hand combat?
Now you all know the rules.
The winner lives
to face another day
while the loser
becomes barbecue chew-flé!
And tonight, we have something
really special for you all.
A little number composed from
the fleshy one's
home planet... Earf!
Am I saying that correctly?
- Earf?
- Huh.
Earf!
Now, let the best meal... lose.
Take it away.
What is happening?
Oh my God.
It's karaoke.
♪ Looking in your eyes
I can see a paradise ♪
Aw.
♪ This world that I've found
is too good to be true ♪
Seriously,
of all Earth's tracks?
Now, sing!
♪ This love in my heart
that I'm feeling for you ♪
Boo!
♪ Crazy,
I don't care about that ♪
- ♪ Put your hand in my ♪
- Bye-bye!
- Ah!
- Do you think
that means we're losing?
- ♪ That the world around us... ♪
- What the shit is this?
♪ Baby we can make it
if we're heart to heart ♪
Good one.
♪ And we can build
this thing together ♪
♪ Stand the stormy weather ♪
♪ Nothing's gonna stop us now ♪
Keep it going,
keep it going, more!
♪ ... world runs out of lovers
We'll still have each other ♪
♪ Nothing's gonna stop us ♪
♪ Nothing's gonna
stop us now ♪
♪ I'm glad I found you ♪
♪ Whatever it takes ♪
Maybe we should
help a bunny out.
Make it stop!
♪ They say I'm crazy,
what do they know ♪
♪ Put your arms around me, baby
don't ever let go ♪
- Ugh.
- Looks like we have a winner...
...for dinner.
Dessert is served.
Now.
Yippee ki yay.
- Bye-bye!
- Brace yourself.
♪ And we can build
this thing together ♪
♪ Standing strong forever ♪
- Stop them!
- ♪ Nothing's gonna stop us ♪
♪ Nothing's gonna stop us ♪
♪ Ooh ♪
♪ All that I need is you ♪
♪ All that I ever need ♪
♪ All that I want to do ♪
♪ Is hold you forever,
ever and ever ♪
What's going on?
This wasn't part of the plan!
Stop them!
Ah! Do something!
Guy that pays me just got his
brains blown out, so, uh, nah.
So what do you reckon, Amae?
We go west?
It's a great plan.
Let's go, let's go, let's go!
- Go, I'll catch up!
- Sounds good!
Really?
Are you kidding me?
You piece of...
Oh,
you thought that I was gonna...?
That's awkward.
Amae.
Take her away.
Fifteen years ago...
I promised to kill a measly
ten-year-old queen.
Last of a tyrannical bloodline.
I mean, I should've been offered
a seat at the Admirals' table.
But...
...she escaped.
I mean, you know
how exhausting it's been?
The life she's
forced me to lead?
I've become
a joke to the Republic.
A mockery.
Do I seem like a joke to you?
Because you've
been wasting my time!
Well, now that's a shame.
That sort of loyalty
would've been rewarded,
were you
on the right side of history.
Oh!
You went back for this?
Yeah, it's not a big deal.
You said it might come
in handy around the ship, so...
Yeah.
It's pretty cool.
You're gonna hook her up for us
before we drop you off
at the next station?
- I'm coming with you.
- What?
To Wix.
To get your mom.
Hey, look, I...
I can't have more...
Blood on my hands,
yeah, you said.
Thing is, the two of you won't
last five minutes without me.
I've seen blood, war, pain.
More than you understand.
Like you, I've spent
my life just surviving.
Yeah, but it's not your fight.
Imagine if
everyone thought that.
It would be a pretty
schlucky universe.
Excuse my language.
We'll, um...
make up a room for you.
Do you think she'd be okay if
I labelled our bathroom shelves?
Knock yourself out.
Okay. Let's go.
I don't see them
showing up on the planet now.
Huh.
Must've just missed them.
Oh. They're approaching Qualla.
Oh. We won't fail.
Again.
You guys looking for
a good time?
Well, it's been
a tough couple of days.
That sounds like
a really lovely...
No, thank you.
Not the sort of
good time you're looking for.
Oh. Thanks, anyways.
What's the problem?
We'll get the next ones.
♪ Hey ♪
♪ Hey ♪
♪ Hey ♪
♪ Hey ♪