Trigun (1998): Season 1, Episode 1 - The $$60,000,000,000.00 Man - full transcript

Meryl and Milly are searching for the Legendary "Vash the Stampede". They are rumored that it is a man that is twelve feet tall and has a green mohawk. A while later they meet a man befitting the description, but this man has already captured a man that he is convinced is Vash.

Vash the Stampede?

Yeah. They say the man
with $ $60 billion on his head...

...showed up in Dankin Town.

Didn't you hear?

So, what happened?

They say the town got wasted!

Dankin was buried in corpses.

The coffin maker got so rich, he
built himself a mansion made of wood!

That's nuts!

What'd you expect?

Messing with Vash
is like waltzing with Death.

He kills women and children,
and picks off any town he pleases.

"The Humanoid Typhoon"
is the perfect name for him!

What the f...?!

I finally found you.

One night, and look at this.

I didn't believe the rumors,
but he really is a typhoon.

Over half the town is rubble!

That's a real shame.

At least he made the undertakers happy.
What did he get, 100? 200?

Actually, zero.

Countless people were injured,
but there were no fatalities.

I guess you don't need God
for a miracle.

What did he look like?

He's a short-legged,
earringed giant in red.

I didn't get a look at him myself.


Whatever you do, stay away
from him! For your own good.


The area of Dankin
is nearly demolished.

All residents, please go to
your designated shelter areas.

The next update will be at 1:30 pm.

Please enjoy our musical selection.

What'll it be?

A banana sundae.

A g?teau mille-feuille
with Ceylon tea!

Listen missies, the gag won't
work unless you order milk!

Then we'd give you
all the milk you want!

Although it wouldn't be free.

But I don't want milk,
I want Ceylon tea.


I'm so sorry!

You clumsy bitch!

I broke another sling.

You have a spare, don't you?
Be more careful.

I will!

- What is she?!
- A monster!

By the way, mister, we heard that
Vash the Stampede was in Felnarl...

Vash? Who are you two?

Are you innocent-looking things
after the $ $60 billion reward?

Not at all.

We're here on business.


Well, I didn't see him myself...

...but they say he
left town before dawn.

They say he went east.

Can you tell us
what he looks like?

He stands about 12 feel tall
and wields a huge weapon.

And he's supposed
to have a Mohawk.

He has tons of henchmen...

...and is the worst kind
of womanizer out there.


A man with a huge
weapon and a Mohawk.

That's him, all right!

Where'd he go?

Find him, even if you have
to dig up the entire area!

But, boss, you think that
yellow coward was really him?

I can't believe it.
Let's move on.

You're real big
to give me orders.

You saw what he was wearing!
Get him!

Get him or I'll break your neck!

Yes, boss!

I thought I'd suffocate.


Pardon me, won't you?

Thanks to you guys...

...I almost went to pieces.

It's a miracle I got away.

I found him!
He's over there!!


He thinks he's funny.

Hunt him down.

I'm hungry.

Persistent, aren't they?

Ha ha ha! I'm like
a standing target over here!


Don't move now!
I've got you in my sights!

Boss, he's over here!!

Er, I'd rather you
lowered the gun quietly.

Forget it!

Surely you don't like pain?

I'm used to it.

Your little wife
and kids are crying.

I'm single, and no girl
has ever looked my way.

What a lonely life!

Like I'm saying...

...die. For our happiness.

I can't do that.

Get down!


Well done. I commend you.

You hurt your pal, too.
Where's the justice in that?

- The pain...
You hurt your pal, too.
Where's the justice in that?

We are not pals,
we are partners in fate!

My happiness
is his happiness!

That's so beautiful.

So go ahead and shoot me...

...if that big gun of yours
isn't just for show.

I can't stand blood.
The sight of it makes me faint!

Okay, then! Let's see what happens
when you see your own blood!

You! Hold him down
for my happiness!

See how devoted he is?

Ow, ow!

Could you be more gentle?

Good. Now to take him in to the Feds.

Ya-hoo! We'll be rich!

Women? They friends of his?

Are they after our prize?

We're going in.

Yes, ma'am!

What do you want?

P-Pleased to m-meet you!

I'm Meryl Stryfe from
the Bernardelli Insurance Society.

I'm Milly Thompson!

Please accept this
token of good will!

Smooth, ma'am!

What're you doing here?
You with him?

No! We're here on behalf of
the Bernardelli Insurance Society...

...for Vash the...


I finally found you,
my $ $60 billion beauty...

...Vash the Stampede.

I am Ruth Loose...

...the bounty hunter
called "Constance Rifle."

Vash the Stampede,
I'm here for your head.


- Ma'am!
- This is bad.

I think I missed something.

It's a privilege to meet you,
Vash the Stampede.

Your head is starting
to resemble a greenback.

You can't blame me, since
it is worth $ $60 billion.

What'll we do, ma'am?

T-That goes without saying!
We stop them!


Hey! You said
your name is Ruth?

Uh, listen!

I'm glad you enjoy your job,
but I think you're a little late.

Please listen...

Late? I don't think so.

You idiot! Where are you
pointing that thing?!

At a $ $60 billion skull.

Don't be a moron!

The boss, Vash?!
Where'd you get that idea?

I'm not fool enough
to listen to no henchman.

That's a mighty poor joke.

This is ridiculous!
Quit wasting my time.

Don't move!

A short-legged,
earringed giant in red.

You are Vash the Stampede!

What are you talking about?!

Vash is a blonde man in a
red coat, with a big gun!

N-No, he isn't!

Vash is a man with a
big weapon and a Mohawk!!

That's strange.

The rumors don't match.

What now?

What now?! We have to
believe what we heard.


At any rate, I'm not Vash!

Boss, look!

The Feds will pay $ $60 billion
for Vash the Stampede, dead or alive.

I can kill you now,
if you like.

Blonde man, red coat, big gun.

I see. You're trying
to get the jump on me...



You even came up with
a fake name! Nice plan!


He's gotta be the real deal!
Let's get him!

I see. So that's how
you stayed alive.

Blast him!!


Don't push your luck!

The Humanoid Typhoon is loose!
What'll we do, ma'am?

What'll we do?! Naturally...

...we run away!

While there's life, there's hope!

We have to give the town
an evacuation order, or else!

But, ma'am, isn't this
like abandoning our duty?

Well, yes, but if we
don't contact the town...

Mm, these are really tasty!

How did you get those?!

Thanks! I was getting hungry!
Danke, danke!

We didn't come here
to save you, you know!

Then what were you doing there?
You go for guys like that?

I'm afraid you're wrong!
We came on business!

We're disaster investigators for
the Bernardelli Insurance Society!

So why are insurance people
after a wanted man?

There have been over 300
Vash the Stampede-related disasters.

You can understand what kind of
risk an insurance company takes.

Yeah, that must be rough.

That's why we're here to keep
him under 24-hour surveillance... prevent further damage!

24-hour WHAT?!

What's wrong?

- N-Nothing!
- I know!

In exchange for this and the donuts,
would you please go warn the town?

I'll even lend you a thomas.

You're going back there?

It's our job.

It looks like it's over.

Thank goodness
there was no damage.

But didn't the
bounty hunter get killed?

Yes, it's sad.

So how are we going to
approach him this time?

This one's a thirty-pack!

Way to go, ma'am!

If you are courteous,
there is nothing to fear.

You've got a lot of nerve
to come back here!

Uh, please accept this
token of good will!

Where's the guy who
ran away with you?

W-We split up halfway!

It was so damned hard
to track him down.

What did I ever do to you, Ruth?!

It's you!

How are you alive?!
Weren't you fighting?

We each realized our mistakes.

Each?! You're the one
who screwed up!

Now listen!
We split the pot 70/30!

Don't you forget it!

What is this about?

- Okay, let's go!
- Just a moment.


I knew we shouldn't
have taken this job.

What good will this do?

Just enjoy.

You have bad taste.

I kind of like it.

The rumor did say he's
"the worst kind of womanizer."

Now is not the time
to remind me.

Which will it be? Pleasure
before death, or just death?

Boss, it's an emergency!

What is it?!

I'm having an emergency!!

- Why that...
- He's here!

It's him!

Got him!


Thanks for saving me the trouble
of looking for you, Vash the Stampede!


He's gone! Where'd he go?!

Where are you going?

- To the potty, sir!
- Oh.

He saved us, but...

...he's embarrassing to watch.

All right! Corner him!


That's far enough, Vash!

So, you wanna die by my boomerang,
or do a suicide dive off the cliff?


I disapprove of suicide
more than anything.

Then the boomerang you get.


It's only fun until
someone gets hurt!



- He got the boss!
- He's not human!

Such fragile bonds of trust.

And as for you!

Look out.

For what?!

Oops, too late.

Sorry. Get well soon.

Amazing! He got both of them.

It's as if he were
Vash the Stampede!

Did I work off
the donuts and the $ $ 10?

It couldn't be him.

Disaster report:

We have determined that the landslide
which destroyed Felnarl resulted...

... from illegal use of explosives
belonging to a man named Ruth Loose.

Please pay the insurance owed.

We're back to less
than zero on our Vash hunt.

And we can't ignore the rumors...
This is going to be difficult.

What about him?

That couldn't possibly be him.


Vash the Stampede?

Yeah, they say the man
with $ $60 billion on his head...

...showed up in Felnarl.

- Didn't you hear?
- Nope. So, what happened?

The town is gone.

Funny thing is,
they say nobody died.

You mean like, you don't
need God for a miracle?

There is something which
cannot be expressed in words.

People's emotions.

Emotions of the heart
cannot be defined.

But there is one way
to read the emotions.

Look into their eyes.

The girl lied to me.
The gentleman lied to me.

But the moment
I looked into their eyes...

...fate began to alter,
to reveal the truth.

Just look into their eyes.
There is only one truth.