Totally Spies! (2001–2014): Season 1, Episode 24 - Do You Believe in Magic? - full transcript

♪ Here we go, we're getting
on the road till we stop ♪

♪ And then we'll shop ♪

♪ So one, two, three now, baby
Here we go, go, go ♪

♪ Here we go, here we go ♪

♪ On a mission undercover
and we're in control ♪

♪ Here we go, here we go ♪

♪ We're Totally Spies
so get on with the show ♪

♪ Here we go, here we go ♪

♪ Here we go ♪

(chatter)

Ladies and gentlemen,
never seen before outside of China,



I give you the famous
Ming Dynasty tapestries.

(gasping)

This priceless artwork is protected

by the most advanced security system
in the world.

If someone was to get too close...

(gasping / applause)

(wind howls / screaming)

(gasps)

(school bell rings)

Like, yuck. This is so not good.

I'm guessing you don't like
your picture for the photo contest?

No, my picture's great.

But this developing goop is like
Nightmare On Manicure Street.

I guess that's what they mean when they
say you have to sacrifice for your art.



- (girls gasp)
- Were you guys working in here?

Nice one, Mandy.
Now our photos are totally ruined.

What does it matter?

The judges wouldn't pick your amateur
snaps over my professional prints.

- Yeah? What makes you so sure?
- The fact that I'm a winner, Sam.

And you three are losers.
But don't worry, it's not all bad.

I'll still wave to you from the stage
when they award me first prize.

Ta-ta!

This is so unfair!
She purposely ruined our work.

Now she's gonna win the contest,
no problem.

- Not if we do something to stop her.
- Like what?

Show our damaged pictures
to Principal Jenkins.

She'd be interested in our story.

(all scream)

(all scream)

Jerry, this is, like,
way bad timing for a mission!

Whoever's working the WOOHP-away machine
needs to work on their aim.

This is security footage of the most
recent of international art thefts,

the Ming Dynasty tapestries.

Why would someone want to steal
a bunch of ugly rugs?

Each of those "ugly rugs"
are over 1,000 years old

with an auction house value of
$10 million.

OK, so they're fancy, ugly rugs.

As documented by this tape, each theft
has had a unique magical flare.

Somehow they vanish
into thin air without a clue.

The international art world
is up in arms.

- Countries are pointing fingers.
- So, how can we help?

An art auction hosted by Spain's royal
family is the probable next target.

We need you to go undercover
as wealthy art connoisseurs.

We're undercover millionaires?
That is so cool.

- Do we get to fly first class?
- Sort of.

(all scream)

Sorry about the bumpy ride, girls,
but we had to get you there in a hurry.

And now for the gadgets.

For this mission we've given you
headband illuminators,

portable reporter recorders
with CD throwing stars,

one hairpin highjumper extend-a-Pole,
three pairs of suction cup gloves,

and bolos wrapper belts.

I'm almost afraid to ask, but how do
we get from up here to down there?

That's quite simple. We deploy
a Stage Two Re-Entry Disengagement.

What's a Stage Two
Re-Entry Disengagement?

I'm glad you asked me. It's this.

- (screaming)
- CLOVER: Next time, Alex, don't ask!

Now, this is what I call a garden party.

SAM: Remember, any of these millionaires
could be the thief, so stay alert.

No one would suspect a rich art snob
of stealing things he could just buy.

If we're making a list of
potential rich, snobby, no-goods,

I'd like to add Mandy's name.

SAM: Mandy will to have to wait until
the mission's over, now it's spy time.

Yes, darling. But of course.

The royal family welcomes you to
the 17th annual Autumn Auction.

Excuse me. Sorry. Scooting by.

First up for bids, Carlos Carmelitas'
famous Vase of the Unknown Soldier.

Start the biding at $500,000.
Thank you, we have 500,000.

Do we have six?
And we have 600,000.

- Seven?
- (sniffs)

Whoa, who is wearing that
Eau de Way Too Strong?

- It's totally choking my sinuses.
- Clover, pay attention.

- The thief could strike at any time.
- Still looking for 700,000.

600, going once...

All I'm saying is it's hard to focus on
work when I'm gagging on...

(holds back sneeze)

- (sneezes loudly)
- We have 700,000.

Will anyone bid eight?
700,000 going once...

- (shrieks)
- Going twice...

Sold to the young lady
in the second row.

(congratulatory chatter)

Our mission just went over-budget.

And now the next item up for bids.
Bernardo Vasco DeGama's last creation.

The famed Don Quixote statue.

We start the bidding of DeGama's only
remaining marble work at five mill...

(gasping)

I'd say it's go time, girls.

(screaming)

Freaky!
It, like, completely disappeared!

500lb statues don't just disappear.

I bet this powdery stuff is
part of the explanation.

Going somewhere?

Can't see a thing.
Switch to high beams.

Talk about musty. Someone needs
to open up a window, big time.

(engine revs / tires screech)

You know, bad guy or not,
he could've at least beeped.

- Huh?
- Art theft in progress.

Official police business.
Well, sort of.

- Hey!
- Sorry, we'll be back soon... I think.

- Sorry!
- Cute flower pots!

BOTH: Whoa!

(screams)

- Woo-hoo!
- (cheering / cows mooing)

Uh-oh, wrong way.

Yippee-kye-yay!

The residue you found at
both disappearance sites

is an explosive compound
used in magic tricks.

So maybe Alex wasn't in an accident?
It was just a trick and she's OK?

All evidence points that way.

As far as the parachute
and tornado illusions go,

they were tricks made famous by
the magician The Great Kandinsky.

Let's go pay a visit
to this Kandinsky guy

and see if he's got a few
extra paintings hanging around.

That won't be possible. He died
some years back in a boating accident.

OK, that definitely gets filed
in the "not helpful" file.

Perhaps not. His grandson still keeps
the family castle open as a shrine.

He might be able to shed
some light on these thefts.

Sounds good to me.

Any place would be better than
this boring siesta-ville.

OK, maybe not any place.

- Yes? Can I help you?
- Hi, I'm Samantha Simpson.

Abra Kadabra Magazine.

My colleague and I are doing
a retro piece on great magicians.

Could we ask a few questions
about your grandfather?

- It would be so, so very helpful.
- Sure, come on in.

MAN: And these were probably
his most famous stage illusions.

The Spiked Coffin
and The Gruesome Guillotine.

(girls gasp)

Look at that, it slices and it dices.

- Oh.
- Hey, cool watch.

MAN: It's my grandfather's
hypnotizing watch.

They say he could put anybody in
a trance with just one swing.

"Twizzle-Twazzle, Twizzle-Twake.
Time for this one to awake."

That's the spell to break the trance.
Kind of goofy, huh?

(chuckles) Yeah, kinda.

So anyway, our readership would die
for the inside scoop

on a famous Kandinsky illusion

like, um, say the secret behind
the Tornado or Parachute illusion.

- Why kind of reporters are you?
- What?

Any real magic enthusiast knows
magicians never reveal their tricks.

I'll have to ask you to leave.

SAM: Nice meeting you, too.

Brr, could his wind chill factor
have gotten any colder?

OK, it's even creepier out here
than it was in there.

- Totally. Let's get out of here, ASAP.
- (both shriek)

- (alligators snarl / girls scream)
- Those are alligators!

Sammy, help me! (screams)

- (both scream)
- Quick, hit the "up" button!

- (both scream)
- Oops, wrong "up" button.

(both scream)

Clover, help!

OK, could this bridge be, like,
any harder to cross?

Call me crazy,
but I'm getting this strange feeling

someone at the castle
doesn't want us hanging around.

I was catching that same vibe.
Why don't we do a night-time sneak-in

and see what the Not-So-Great
Kandinsky is trying to hide?

OK, so the only way to the castle
isn't a way anymore.

No prob.
One moat-crosser coming up.

CLOVER: Remind me to tell Jer we could
use a little wider hairpin next time.

Looks like it's all locked up down here.
Guess we'll have to take the elevator.

- Elevator?
- (both scream)

- Clover, you OK?
- As OK as a girl can be

considering she landed on her butt
on a spooky Transylvanian castle roof

on a Friday date-night
while her best friend is missing.

Good point. Let's go investigate.

What exactly are we looking for?

Whatever Gregor doesn't want us to find.
Try that door.

(shrieks) I'm thinking
that means "do not disturb."

You're right. Maybe
there's another door we could try.

- (both scream)
- Note to Gregor,

dust your castle once in a while.

One of us should see
what's inside that trunk.

Probably. Rock, paper, scissors?

(sighs)

(both cough)

Hey, that's the outfit
the motorcycle thief was wearing.

Gregor, you are so busted.

You know, I've kind of had my fill
of magic stuff for one night.

ALEX: Clover? Is that you?

- Alex!
- She's alive!

Hold on, Alex!

Hi-yah!

Maybe we should use these instead?

- (sighs) About time you got here.
- What happened to you?

- Duh, the thief kidnapped me.
- That's not all he kidnapped.

The stolen artwork.

Well, if it isn't
the magazine reporters.

Magazine reporters?

(screams)
Quick, see if there's a another way out.

- CLOVER: Who's this guy?
- Duh, he's the thief.

- The thief? No, Gregor's the thief.
- Who's Gregor?

Gregor is my grandson.

- Grandfather?! You're alive!
- Yes, dear boy.

The Great Kandinsky lives!

- Why are you doing this, Grandfather?
- They know too much, dear boy.

They've interfered with my plans once.

Translation, we, the good girls,
tried to stop, grandpa, the bad guy,

from stealing famous expensive art.

Which is why he tried
to feed us to the alligators.

Alligators? Stealing art?
What are they talking about?

Me trying to take back
what was stolen from me, Gregor.

You see, I was the best in the world
until someone revealed my secrets.

I disappeared rather than be ruined.

But now I'm back to show the world
who's the greatest magician of all time.

Join me and we shall be
The Great Kandinskys.

This is crazy. Let the girls go.

As you wish. Take this and unlock them.

Now will you join me, Gregor?

Yes, Grandfather.

Farewell, ladies.

We're off to make a jet's priceless
contents mysteriously "disappear."

And in English that means?

The famed King Tut exhibit is on
a plane bound for New York as we speak.

The Great Kandinskys
are going to intercept it.

- Yes, Grandfather.
- Hypnotizing your own grandkid?

Puh-lease, that is, like, so Eighties.

(sighs) So, anybody got any ideas
how we can get out of this mess?

That pendulum's so sharp, it could
probably slice through anything.

- Uh, thanks for the gory visual.
- No, I mean like slice through chains.

Clover can you reach my hairpin gadget
with your head?

- I guess.
- Good.

When I say "three,"
activate it and follow my lead.

One, two, three!

Everybody lift your chains.
Before it swings back.

Note to self, rolling on to floors
is not good for the butt.

Jerry, we need a plane, fast.

How long until we see the Tut plane?

ALEX: I'd say just about...

We'll have to do a mid-air jump.

Mid-air jump as in go outside our plane
and leap hundreds of feet?

No, silly. We'll have a rope ladder.
It'll only be like 50ft.

Any chance we could just
follow the plane until it lands?

Too much time for Kandinsky
to do his dirty work.

- Suction cup gloves in place?
- ALL: Check.

OK, I'll go first.
(screams)

Didn't exactly stick the landing.

- (both chuckle nervously)
- Youngest first, you go.

- No, oldest first, you.
- How about rock, paper, scissors?

(both scream)

(screams)

I hope this Tut guy appreciates
what we're doing for him.

Pee-yew. These artifacts
smell like old socks.

Shh. Someone's coming.

To the victor go the spoils.

The Kandinsky name
will go down in history.

Yes, Grandfather.

Uh, not so fast, gramps.

Your magic act is over, Kandinsky.

Direct hit.

(both gasp)

- Now you see him, now you don't.
- How did he...

ALL: Hey!

Really, really don't like this guy.

Time to take your last bow, magic man.

No, it's time for you three
to be crushed.

Abra-kadabra!

(all gasp)
ALL: Whoa!

- Sticky situation here, Sam. Any ideas?
- It is a very sticky situation.

Suction gloves, girls.
Grab something, now!

(screams)

Let him go, Clover!
He's bad news!

Only when he's hypnotized.
Otherwise he's kinda cute.

Now you see him, now you don't.

No!

Twizzle-Twazzle, Twizzle-Twake.
Time for this one to awake.

- Hey, come on. I said, "awake."
- Maybe you gotta snap your fingers.

- Ooh, good tip.
- How did I wind up here with you?

Just lucky, I guess.

MANDY: Ew, nice display, girls.

A picture's worth 1,000 words. Too bad
you couldn't complete a sentence.

ALEX: Unfair, much?

We're out saving the world
and here in our own school,

the worst villain of all wrecks
our photos and gets away with it?

- SAM: There's nothing we can do, Alex.
- No way.

When those judges come,
I'm telling about the darkroom thing.

- But we can't prove it.
- I'll think of something.

Hmm, are those pictures
light-damaged?

- Yes, and the reason they are is...
- Tremendously unique presentation.

Exposing flaws
as opposed to hiding them.

- I think we have our winners.
- We won?!

But how could they?

My work was supervised by the
famous photographer, Danny Lebowitz.

A technically marvelous photographer,
but commonplace.

Much like your photo.

First prize to Alex, Clover and Sam

whose outside-the-box photo development
shows a creativity that must be awarded.

This is so unfair!

I demand a recount!
How about a tie? Pretty please?

I'll pay you!