This Is England '90 (2015): Season 1, Episode 2 - Summer - full transcript
Upset at being refused a place on a college photography course Shaun sets out with Trev, Kelly, Gadget and Harvey for an open air rave in the country though, along with their friends Flip and Higgy, they get lost and wind up at a New Age Travellers' camp. Here Shaun is consoled for the death of his father by the kindly, middle-aged Roma though not all the group have a happy experience. Back home Lol and Woody host a barbecue for family and friends after which Lol gets an important phone call from her mother.
That was our Trev on the
phone. She's on her way now.
Then it's Kelly and Shaun
from Kelly's mum's at 3:30,
and then it's me, you, the
gang and the open road, mate.
- You moving out?
- Say again.
I said, are you moving out, duck?
No, what you on?
Why have you packed so many bags?
- It's for the rave.
- We're only there for one night.
You said it was a nighter so
I've brought enough for...
Yeah, a nighter. Not a yearer.
Yeah, but, if you think
about it logically,
it's a day, a night, and
then another day and then...
If you're thinking about it logically,
you need underpants, condoms and drugs.
They're in the odds and
sods bag over there.
- That's all you need, then, brother.
That's all you need. - Yeah, but...
- We need provisions, mate.
- Provisions? Like him?
He coming?
- Is he coming?
- Doesn't have to come.
I weren't set on him.
There's a fucking bag within a bag
here. That's a bag inside a bag.
It's for souvenirs, mate.
In case we see owt for Lolly,
Woody and the kids and that.
We're not going to American Adventure.
We're not going to get a picture of
your chops going down the log flume.
We're going to a rave. We're going
to get out our heads, have a mash up.
I'm just trying to think in case we
stay, in case we end up somewhere.
You've thought way too much on this, man.
Way too fucking much.
I'm going to go for a wank
and a shit and a bath.
Downsize it a little bit.
Condense it down a bit, brother,
because that's just ridiculous.
MUSIC: Hallelujah by Happy Mondays
♪ Hallelujah
♪ Hallelujah
♪ Hallelujah
♪ Hallelujah
♪ Hallelujah
♪ Hallelujah. ♪
Ergh.
That was a bit of a wild
one last night, weren't it?
Yeah.
You was a bit wild, anyway.
Do you want me to do some breakfast?
I can do a banging bacon butty.
No, mate, honestly, I've really got to go.
- Fucking hell, is that the time? - Yep.
Well, can I get your number or summat?
I'm...
I'm never really situated
in the same, like, place
so that probably wouldn't really work.
Have I done summat wrong?
No. No. Not at all.
I just work with my mum and my sister
and they're going to fucking
flip so I'd better go.
Nice to meet you, Stu.
Is it there?
Yeah.
Well, come on. Get it open. We
can't eat our dinner till we know.
What if it's a no?
It won't be a no. It'll be a positive.
You were the star pupil on
that drama course, Shaun.
- Word travels fast, don't it?
- It does, yeah.
Well, as long as you know that
I tried even if it is a no.
Brilliant. It's a no.
What?
Little sod! He'll have me at it all day.
We're sorry to inform you
that, after much consideration,
we can't offer you a place
on the photography course
due to the manner in which
you left the drama course
- back in January, 1989. That's
a bloody mistake. - It has to be.
It's not a mistake, is it?
It's right. I left the course.
It's a different course, Shaun. They've...
It doesn't matter what course
it is. It's the same college.
- Shaun, you was in bits over Michelle.
- It doesn't matter.
Like they give a fuck about
that. They're not bothered.
I'm going to get Dr Lenny
to have a word with...
- No, you're not.
- Shaun, you was on anti-depressants.
- It doesn't matter.
- You didn't just bloody swan off.
It doesn't matter. They're not going
to take it into consideration.
- Just leave it at that.
- It does matter.
It doesn't fucking matter! How many times?
It's my fucking life! Not
yours! It's my fault!
I walked off the fucking
course and I'm not bothered!
- I did it to get you off my back anyway!
- Fine. Look, just calm down.
- I don't care! - Fine. - I don't care!
OK. Now calm down, Shaun.
Shaun, love, I'm sorry. All
right, I won't say anything.
It's just the injustice of
it, love. It's not right.
It doesn't matter, Mum.
It says no. End of.
Gadge, what have we got here?
Survival gear, Trev.
Cousin's in the air cadets so
he taught me a thing or two.
We're only going for a day.
Yeah, but, I've heard
about these raves, Trev.
Go for a day thinking, "Yeah,"
you end up at another party,
another party, another party.
Some people end up in
Ibiza and everything, mate.
Yeah, all right, Gary.
- You haven't listened, have you, mate?
- Yeah, I have.
There's still a load of shit here.
There's still a massive pile of shit.
Mate, that's like half of
what you said I couldn't take.
It doesn't matter. There's still too
much there, brother. Way too much.
- It's all essential.
- I can't believe what I'm looking at.
- This is what Trev's got.
- That's it. - That's what you've got.
- You're a bloke. - We need
it! - What do we need here?
- That bag is your sleeping bag, mate.
- Let's get what we need.
- Let's get your... - Sleeping bag,
yeah. - We need that. - Necessity.
- We need a tent to sleep
in, don't we? - Necessity.
But, in terms of, like,
pig chow, sweets...
Mate, we need them, mate, for the road.
- Harvey, don't be a dick!
- Fuck off, mate.
That's my sweets, mate!
One bag of sweets, made!
- Large G&T, please.
- No problem.
- There you are, love.
- Thanks. - Thank you.
- There you are. - Thank
you. - Thank you. - Cheers.
- Right, that's me done.
- All right, cheers.
What's up?
What?
So what am I going to do about Kelly?
Don't be too hard on her, Lol.
She has to do from nine to one,
Mum, yeah? Who can't do them hours?
She's just struggling a bit at the minute.
Struggling with what? What?
Look, she's going away this weekend.
- One final blow out with Gadge
and Harvey and that. - Oh, God.
I'll sit her down on Sunday, have a
proper good word with her. I promise.
She'll be here on time every
fucking day next week with bells on.
- Yeah?
- Yeah, fine.
- You still on for the barbecue later?
- Yeah, definitely.
- Want me to bring owt?
- No. You're good.
- See you later. - Nice
one. Thanks, Mum. - See ya.
Mate, just give her five
minutes. We'll find her.
We can't go without her, can
we, Harv? You're being a nob.
We can, boss. That's the thing. We can.
- Are you taking the piss?
- Come on.
I had my mix in here. Where is it?
She's just forgot that we told her hers.
- She's probably stood outside Shaun's.
- No, she's there.
Oh, there she is, Harv.
- 3:30 at your mum's, Kel.
- What?
3:30 at your mum's. Nice
one. Where the fuck were you?
- At the pub.
- Wicked. Nice one.
- Are you getting in?
- Weren't it 4:30 at Shaun's?
No. It was 3:30 at your mum's.
- Get in, then.
- Erm...
Swing by mine and I'll get ready.
- Absolutely not, no.
- I'll have a shower.
I'll literally be two seconds
and I'll come straight out.
Not happening. Get in the
car or don't get in the car.
- My outfit's on the bed.
- We've been driving round for an hour.
- Get in the car or fuck off.
- Just get in. - You're not coming.
- Come on. - You're taking the
piss? - Absolutely not. Can we go?
I'll be one second. I'll
go in, I'll have a quick...
Listen, you great frigging
twat, get in the car now.
I've been driving round for a
fucking hour. Get in the car.
- Kel, just get in the car. Come on.
- Get in the fucking car.
- So I'm going to go like this?
- Yeah.
I'm not fucking arguing with
you. I'm going. Bye, bye, bye.
- Hold on, then. Stop being
such a prick. - Thank you.
Budge up, you fat...
Budge up, then, you fucking ginge minge.
I'm the only one that's not said owt.
Hold on! I'm not even in the car!
- Have you got a drink?
- Right.
Who likes salmonella?
Yeah!
Who likes violent illness?
Yeah!
Who likes throwing up?
Doo-dee-dee-doo-dee-doo-dee-doo!
Yeah, that's cool. Doing well, there.
- How far can you slide down?
- Whoo!
Oh, you big boy. Have
you brought them out?
- How are you, sweetheart?
- I'm all right.
Give us a kiss.
You've got ketchup on your...
- Don't be like that.
- Get out of it!
- Don't embarrass me! - Get
off! - Don't embarrass me!
Oh, careful.
- What are you doing?
- Tried to kiss me.
You've got tomato sauce all in your...
Yeah, he just kissed me, as well.
Is it bad? How bad is it out of ten?
Oh! Oh! Oh!
You've ruined the day!
- Take a peek on these sweeties.
- Oh, amazing. - Double barrels.
Just like a shotgun.
We'll go full. Me and
you, we'll go full, Gadget.
- Mate, mate, one at least.
- Girls, you go halves on one.
Nah, I reckon I could drop one of them.
Shaun the prawn, you have a 16th.
Yeah?
- Give it a nibble, see
what you think. - Serious.
I know what you're trying to do.
Mate, honestly, it's like
nothing else you've ever had.
It's not like this shit.
It just makes you...
Makes you want to hug
the world, basically.
- This is what you feel like. - This
is it. - All of the time. All the time.
Just love, man. Just love.
Gay, straight, love.
You just want to love.
You want to mix with other people in love.
- Now, then, is everyone full off
impetigo burgers? - Yeah, bloody hell.
- I feel sick but...
- It's just as well.
You'll notice I didn't eat
much during that whole affair.
- Yeah, because you didn't want to get ill.
- I didn't want to get ill.
- That's correct. - But we will. - There's
a reason for not wanting to get ill
because we're going to find out
who the hardest man or woman is
via the medium of arm wrestling.
- This is going to end in disaster.
- I want to watch this.
- Right, ready when you are.
- I'll lay the table. Come on, Nicky. Come on.
Keep hold of the table. I'm on it.
Come on, Nicky! Come on!
- I love his face!
- Come on, Woody!
- You have to touch the table.
- Don't put your head on it.
Honestly, she's really hard.
Come on.
- Oh, no.
- Yes!
Yes.
Straights against lesbians, get on that.
- Is that your wanking hand?
- It is, yeah. - It's really strong.
Pathetic.
Oh!
Ah!
Do it! Do it! Do it!
- Go on, give your mum a hand.
- Oh, shit. He's really strong.
Push it that way.
No. No. No.
I'm not playing!
Erm, I don't want to be funny or anything
but are you sure we're
going the right way,
because it seems a bit familiar, Gadge?
Yeah, no, no, we're on the right track.
That dry wall looks a bit familiar, Gadge.
- We definitely have been
down there, mate. - Yeah, yeah.
- Please do, yeah.
- A to Z.
- You couldn't have got a pocket one?
- Look out, fatty boom boom.
I couldn't get a pocket
one, no. I'm sorry.
- Are you serious?
- What? I need to read it.
I need to match the map with the road.
I know, mate, but you don't have to
put it up on the fucking windscreen.
You're a fucking liability, mate.
Do you even know how to read a map, Gadge?
Listen, I know how to
read a map, mate, right?
That's all you need to know.
- Fucking read it, then.
- I'm reading it. Right.
- What? Right here?
- No, no, no, no, hold on.
We're this green line here.
And, when we get down to this little
yellow line, we go left, right?
- Right, you ready, Milk?
- Er, yeah.
- Don't lick it. - I've got to lick it.
I've got to lick it to stick it on.
Wet it with your finger.
Just going to get that perfectly
between them eyebrows.
Get it right there.
That's the mother. Right there.
Right, ask us some questions.
- It's so you.
- Am I male?
Yes, you are.
Erm, am I... Am I famous?
No.
Well, I don't know.
In the area, amongst certain
females, probably famous.
Am I fat?
- From what I've seen...
- Yeah? - .. pale and tired.
- Am I a penis?
- You are a penis.
But it's in a certain place.
- So close.
- Quite close to where it is now.
You lot are dickheads.
Dickhead!
- Am I female?
- Yes.
Oh, she's a powerful woman.
Well, she's...
- Am I famous?
- Yes, but for all the wrong reasons.
Do you know who she is?
- No. - Maybe not ask
the kids. - Oh, OK.
- Am I Margaret Thatcher?
- No.
- No, boo! - Boo! - Thank fuck for that.
You're worse than Thatcher.
Worse than Thatcher? Shit the bed.
Give us a go on that.
Am I old, then?
- No. No.
- Not old.
I'll give you a clue.
I call you it all the time.
Oh, Myra Hindley.
Shit the bed. Fuck you.
- Gadge, we've fucking been past this.
- We're not!
I'm telling you now, we've been past
that fucking sign about four times.
- There's a place here called Cock End and...
- You're a cock-end.
Mate, if we've been past
Cock End, I'd know about it.
- That mile sign. We've
passed it, Gary. - We've not.
- Yes, we fucking have, mate.
- That milestone? - That mile sign.
That mile thing. That milestone. Past it.
It's the third time passing it, boss.
- You've not been watching the fucking road.
- I swear to God, mate!
I can't watch the road and read the map.
I ask you for one thing and you
don't do fuck all right, do you?
- You watch the road and I...
- I am watching the road.
- You've been doing owt.
- We have to work as a team.
Look, the fucking map's got holes in it.
- Good map, then. - It was the best
we could do. - Well done, Gary.
I swear to God, mate, you're ruining
our fucking lives at the moment.
You have no fucking idea, do you?
You have no idea.
As you can see, I have
brought out my ghetto blaster.
It is not the most technical of devices
but I have maxed up the
volume there. It's on maximum.
I'm about to take you to another galaxy
- and we're going to party like
it's 1999. - Whoo. - Right?
- What's this?
- Erect yourselves.
Oh. Dancing. Do you want to
dance, Milo? You want to dance?
Oh, man.
Eh, you having that?
- Mate, there's too many lines.
- Shut up, Gary. I'm driving here.
There's red, there's blue, there's green.
- I swear to fucking...
- Oi! What's this?
Twat!
Oh, my God. Leave him. Leave him. Stop it.
Now look what you've done,
you fucking stresshead, mate!
- You've got my arm.
- Children!
Like fucking children.
Now the map's gone.
- Fucking hell, lads. - We don't know
where the fuck we are anyway, Gary.
That went too far.
Have a fag if you want a fag.
Cheers, mate.
MUSIC: Fantastic Man by William Onyeabor
Whoa. Careful. Be careful.
Taking turns. Taking turns.
Doing a little routine.
♪ Since I came to know you, baby, yeah
♪ I've been telling you how sweet you are
♪ I've been telling you how good you are
♪ Now you want to try and
tell me how I look... ♪
- Oh. Yay!
- Yay!
♪ You look so good
♪ Fantastic man
I'm drunk, Woods.
I know you are. Don't be scared.
Can you forgive me, Gary, for
what I just did a minute ago?
Yeah, I suppose so,
just sometimes just watch,
do you know what I mean?
- Because now the map's
gone, innit? - I know.
I'm dead sorry for getting
physical and verbally aggressive.
- I am very sorry for it.
- Here you are. Hang on.
There's summat smoking over there.
I think someone's broke down.
- What? - Look. That's bad. - Hang on.
- They might be ravers, though.
- Could be. Could be.
Might know where it is.
- Oh, what a stroke of luck!
- Fuck's sake. - Drive round.
- Help us.
- Just drive past.
Stop.
Oh, holy Jesus.
Higgy, I know these people.
- Get out the car.
- Harvey. - How you doing?
Oh, it's amazing to see you, my friend.
How are you?
- Better than your car.
- Gary. Hello.
- Hello, Kelly. - Gadge.
- You all right, mate?
Is that boob juice you've
got all over your top there?
Kelly,
bless you, my child.
Oh, for fuck's sake.
What are you doing here?
I'm with my mates.
If I had some metal now...
Little bastard.
- You broke down, have you, Flip?
- Well, you... Kind of.
Well, it's more like
just cooling down a bit.
It's heating up, mate, that. It's bad.
Well, it's a purring dragon.
Sometimes he just needs to land,
fold his wings and just calm down a bit.
- So, where you going, Harv?
- Where you going, Flip?
- Ah, to the rave up.
- Ah. - Nice, yeah.
Yeah, Higgy loves a
rave, don't you, Higgy?
- Guilty.
- Yeah.
- He was nearly in tears till
we saw you, yeah. - Where is it?
- Nearly let him down. Same place you're going.
- Where is it, though?
Yeah, we'd have met there, wouldn't we?
You tell us where and we'll
come back, bring rescue.
- It's local, innit?
- But where?
Oh, right. Do you not...
- Do you not know where you're going?
- Yeah. Just it's...
- No, we don't, Flip. No, we ain't
got a clue, boss. - Oh, right.
Are you going to tell us?
If I tell you where the rave is,
you're going to deny us a lift
- in that spastic wagon.
- Mate, we'll get someone from the rave.
Listen, listen, come on.
- There's no room.
- We ain't not going to that rave.
- You shut up.
- We ain't not going.
Just look at the ground.
Look at the ground.
I'm in the front, mate. They
can fuck off if they think...
- One of yous is in the boot.
- Ginge. - No, fuck off, mate.
- I'm already in the back.
- Shaun, you're smaller than me.
- You get in the boot, Shaun.
Come on, Shaun. - No, mate.
Harvey, make Shaun get in the boot.
Carry on and you'll have no fucking lift.
- Let me know when you get
there, yeah? - Sarcasm.
- Oh, my God.
- Move up, that's right.
Ow.
You feel that in your side, Kelly?
- Everybody in?
- It's man log.
You didn't know where
it was, did you, Flip?
I thought I did, and...
It wasn't a wind up, honest, Harv, and...
I wanted to take you to your rave and...
I feel like I've let you all down.
We didn't know were it was anyway,
boss, don't worry about it.
That's very kind of you all, thanks.
- Shall we piss off then? - Ugh! - Mate!
- What else we going to do?
- There's no point in going home to do nothing.
- We've got beer and that.
- Stay in the fucking woods?
Yeah, build a little fire out
of drift wood, we'll be f...
There's no point driving all the way
back home to do fuck all, is there?
- Come on!
- We've got our pills.
- Do you all really fancy it?
- Yeah!
Why not? Whack some music on and that.
Fuck it, we'll stay here
then. If you want, mate,
I'll take you back to your car
and you can piss off and all.
Well...
I don't mind hanging with you guys...
and your party in the woods.
Please don't take me back there, Harvey.
It's like American Werewolf
in Yorkshire out there.
Truth is, mate, we ain't
got enough pills for you.
Oh, we... we've bought pills
to the table, Harvey! Yeah!
- Pack of 30.
- Pack of 30 what?
Pro Plus.
Different thing, we've got a
completely different thing.
Three or four of them
and you're up all night.
Don't make us leave!
- Shit! - How long's he been in there?!
- Fuck knows, man. - Fucking ages!
Swore he was right here!
- Fucking hell, mate!
- Hig!
- All right, dude?
- Here he is!
I'm fine, me brother used
to lock me in the cupboard,
sometimes for hours on end and that,
- so I'm quite good in small spaces.
- Fair play to you.
Happy times.
Let us stay, mate?
I promise I'll behave myself.
I'll keep these bad boys to myself.
Fuck it, I feel really sorry for you
boys, but it ain't just up to me.
That's the thing, like.
You reckon?
Come on, guys.
Can't leave them on their
own. We can get a few in car.
Go on, then. Fine!
- Let's get very happy, though.
- You're in. - Brilliant.
- Aww. That's really great of you.
- Enjoy yourself.
Have half of this, though. If it's
your first time, I'd have half.
Lads, I'm pretty big, and I
feel I can handle a full one.
Honestly, mate, I'm telling you the truth.
Just hang on, have half first.
OK, I trust you, hombre. I trust you guys.
- Thanks. - Gadgy. - Cheers.
- OK, Wow. - Shaun, just have
half with me to start off with.
- I'll have less than half, mate.
- Yeah, he needs less that half.
- Fuck off! - To the
night, guys. - To the night!
- Guys, here we go.
- To the night in the woods.
- To a night in the woods!
- OK.
- Can I have a bit of that drink, Trev?
- Before you, Ginge. Jesus.
Have you just done yours with out a drink?
Oh, no, you still have it.
It taste like fucking shite.
Yeah, I'm not feeling anything,
Harvey. I can handle a full one.
I promise you, give it time, mate.
I'd say, half an hour at least,
and you'll be off your head.
- Brilliant. - Shall I put
some music on, then? - Yeah.
The Ginger Ginge!
- Shall I put some Roses on?
- Yeah.
Where about's are they, Harv?
- Down in floor, they were down
near my foot. - Can't find it.
Oh, hang on, mate.
Is it the one with the red cover on?
Hang on, hang on. Shh, shh, shh.
Wait, listen. Can you hear that?
It's, like, drumming or something.
- I can hear that, Trev.
- We've found it, haven't it?
Fuck!
- Ladies and gentlemen....
- Fucking hell, boys and girls.
We're fucking here!
FUCK YES!
- Beautiful, man!
- I told you I'd take you there!
I told you!
Let's do this!
What the fuck?!
That's not it, is it?
There's nowhere near 2,000 there, mate.
Is that a wigwam?
This definitely isn't it.
Looks like a fucking seance!
Well, a party's, a party, isn't it?
Yeah, but, we can't all
go in there like this,
- we'll stand out like a sore thumb!
- Has she got her tits out?
- What?
- Loads of tits out, mate.
Yeah, some are nice.
Some are not so nice and long.
Jesus. Free tits, Harv!
- Do you reckon we have it or what?
- Fuck it, I'll suck anything!
Come on, then!
Party!
She's pissed!
Fucking hell!
Groovy shirt, man! Yeah!
- Can I touch your stuff?
- She's got her tits out!
Please let me touch you tits.
This bit. Just this bit.
Don't touch her, Gadge, she'll chop
your hand off! Chop your hand off.
I want to touch it...
'Do you really want to
jump? Do you want to?
'Well, that's fine with me.
Come on. Let's do it, asshole.
- 'Wait a minute! Wha... - I want to
do it. - Wait... What do you mean?!
'Oh!'
- (Get it.) - No way. - (Go on.)
I'm just too tired, I am, Lol.
- Get the phone, Woody.
- No, it's me mum and dad.
Yeah, of course it's your mum and dad.
No, I've had enough of them now.
Woody, get the phone. I'm not
talking to your mum for an hour.
Hello?
Yeah...
Right, let me just nip upstairs
and I'll take the phone up there.
All right, just one sec.
- Right, Woody, it's me mum.
- Mm.
- When I shout, put the phone down.
Are you listening? - Mm-hm. - Yeah?
- Yeah?
- Yes.
Right, put it down then, Wood.
Woody!
- Quick.
- I'm doing it!
It's down.
Hi, you all right?
No. Milky's here, so I couldn't talk.
Come on, then, what's up?
You sound really stressed.
Tell me what's up, Combo.
♪ You could take my time
♪ And make it matter
♪ Make it matter
♪ To me
♪ You could turn my head
♪ You could turn my thought... ♪
- Are you having a nice time?
- I like this.
♪ Make it matter
♪ You make it matter... ♪
This is great. This is great.
I love ecstasy!
♪ I'll never...
♪ Feel this young... ♪
Is it too soon to say that
I think I might love you?
♪ You can take my time
♪ And make it matter
♪ You can take my time
♪ And make it real
♪ You can...
♪ Come on, I need...
♪ Oh, you know you need me
♪ Oh, no, I know you need me
♪ I'll never... ♪
That's amazing.
♪ Feel this young
♪ I'll never
♪ Feel this young
♪ I'm feeling older
♪ I'm feeling older
♪ I'm feeling older
♪ I'm feeling older
♪ I'm feeling older
♪ Yeah, yeah, older, older
♪ I'm getting older
♪ Yeah, yeah, older, old... ♪
- Hello! - Hiya. - How are you?
- I'm good, thanks. How are you?
- I'm very good.
Do you want to come in?
I'd... I'd love to, and to
be invited, it's special.
Come in!
Oh, yeah.
- It's gone a bit mental out
there, hasn't it? - Yeah.
- Mmm. It's good, though!
- Yeah, it is.
It's very ni... It's
nice out there, isn't it?
- Yeah.
- Just everyone....
Just happy, like.
- Yeah, just doing what
they need to do. - Yeah.
- You coming in for a bit of quiet?
- Well... Well...
I won't lie to you, I was...
I was going past for a piss.
- Yeah. - I was going
past for a wee. Excuse me.
- Gadg! Give us a beer, my friend.
- For, you mate.
- Do you know what? I love you.
- This is fucking nice, this.
- I know. I know, it's wonderful.
- You all right?
Love you, mate!
Yeah, it's... It's special here,
like, it's so different you know,
- to anything else.
- Yeah.
'If you would kindly tell me
'everything you know, I
promise I'll kill you quick.'
'I've told you everything I know.'
(Wood?)
(Woody?)
- Woody?
- Ungh!
So, like, I know it's rude
to ask, and I shouldn't,
but can I ask how old are you are?
I'm 47.
- 47?
- Mm.
Wow. You're literally, like,
five years older than my dad.
I know... I didn't'
mean any offence, like...
- I don't take any offence!
- No, no offence. - Yeah.
But...
- Like...
- Do you get on with your dad?
I di... I di... Yeah.
Course, yeah. I fucking love him to bits.
But he's not here anymore, he passed away.
Aww, I'm sorry to hear that.
It happens, like, it happens.
My dad was... He was a fighter
in the war and he bought me up a fighter.
You know, like, he was one of them that...
Like, I know he can see me
now, like he's looking from
above and he's looking at me and you.
He's thinking, "Fucking go on,
boy," that's what he's thinking.
And he was a fighter, and that's
what I've always had in me,
- and he was a brave man.
- Yeah.
Like, he fought for the country,
he fought in the Falklands and...
He was just a brave man, and
that's what he brought me up to be,
and if he'd have been
looking down on me now,
if I was sat here, laying down there
crying, he'd look at me and he'd go,
"Shaun, fucking hell. Sort it out.
What you doing what you crying for?
"Crying's not going to bring
me back." It doesn't, you know?
But if he'd have seen me down here,
you know, having the time of me
life and sat here having fun...
He'd be, like I say, he'd be sat
there going, "Fucking, Shaun,
- "love you to bits, mate."
- Yeah. So he's with you all the time.
All the time, all the time. But...
And how old where you when he passed?
- I would have been 11, 12.
- Oh, right! - Young. - Yeah.
I was young, and er, like...
- I understand death at that
age, obviously, but... - Yeah.
It's just one of them things, isn't it?
- There's nothing you
can do about it. - No.
But you miss him?
- Yeah, obviously.
- Yeah.
There you are.
Are you OK?
Are you all right?
Are you OK?
♪ Everybody speaks
♪ But nobody hears
♪ Everybody speaks
♪ Nobody hears
♪ They waste days
♪ They waste years
♪ I'm the first
♪ I'm the last
♪ I'm the future
♪ I'm the past
♪ Let the prime numbers rise
♪ Let the prime numbers rise
♪ This is God's song
♪ Somebody listen
♪ Do you speak my language?
♪ Has the spirit risen?
♪ I will protect you
♪ I will guide
♪ I will bless when you take my side
♪ This is God's song
♪ Let demons fly
♪ It's you, you, you, you, you
♪ Yeah...
♪ And obviously I
♪ And obviously I
♪ And obviously I
♪ And obviously I
♪ This is God's song...
♪ This is the country
♪ This is the drug
♪ This is pain...
♪ Of the beginning...
♪ This is a god's song
♪ I let you go
♪ Slip away, slip away, slip away
♪ This is God's song...
♪ This is the country
♪ This is the drop
♪ This is pain...
♪ Of the beginning...
♪ This is a god's song
♪ I let you go
♪ Slip away, slip away, slip away
♪ The click of my fingers
♪ Goes well with thunder
♪ I think you don't know
♪ The curse you're under
♪ Kingdom come...
♪ I'm the heavens
♪ I'm the sun
♪ This is a god's song
♪ You'll be obtained
♪ You'll be reared
♪ This is a god's song
♪ Let demons fly
♪ It's you, you, you, you you!
♪ But obviously I
♪ And obviously I
♪ And obviously I
♪ And obviously I
♪ I'm coming, I'm coming
♪ I'm coming, I'm coming
♪ I'm coming, I'm coming
♪ I'm coming, I'm coming
♪ And obviously I. ♪
I love you so much. You know that?
♪ This is a god's song... ♪
I love you so much. So much.
I love you so much.
You know that? I love you
so much. You know that?
I love you so much.
Dad?
Dad...
♪ Ooooh, oooooh, oooooh
♪ Oooooh, oooooh
♪ Ooooh...
♪ Ooooh, oooooh, oooooh
♪ Ooooh, oooooh
♪ Oooooh...
♪ Oooooh
♪ Here it comes. ♪
- (Morning.)
- Where have you been?
(Fucking down there on couch with him.)
- Why? - Because you didn't
wake me up, you bastard!
Fucking hell!
- Is he still down there?
- Of course he's still there.
He's like a turd that won't flush.
- That's all the food gone, then.
- I've hid it.
- Where?
- In the tumble drier.
Ew! Won't want to eat that now.
It's the only place he
won't think to look.
He will. He'll sniff it out.
Is your mum all right?
- Yeah, why? - She rang last
night. I thought maybe...
Maybe Nikki had got her dildo
stuck all the way up inside her.
- No.
- Was trying to spoon it out.
Oh, Woody, don't! Don't!
You're disgusting.
I'm sorry.
No, it weren't my mum on
the phone. It was Combo.
Oh, fucking hell.
Is he all right?
- No, not really. - Is he not? - No.
He was a bit... bit teary, to be honest.
- Teary? - Yeah. - Was he?
- Well, he's... he's trying to
get out, isn't he? - Mm. - Yeah.
Only it didn't go very well last time and,
well, he was telling me about all
this stuff that he's got to get
together and, you know, what they
expect of him if he gets parole....
Go on, I can feel something.
- Yeah.
- Come on, then.
Well, he needs stability, he
needs people for when he's out
cos he hasn't got anyone,
so he's obviously got...
Drop the bomb. Let's have the bomb.
He needs somewhere to live.
There it is. There it is.
Well, we got a year of happiness.
Didn't we? Fucking hell.
Well, I've said... I've not
said, like, defo yes...
- I've said I'd talk to you about it.
- Of course.
- Of course he's going to have to stay here.
- What do you mean?
He's going to have to stay here,
of course he is. Lollipop...
- You wouldn't mind
Combo moving in? - No.
It's going to be messy,
but I think... Well...
I wouldn't have a son, would
I? I wouldn't have Jimmy...
.. I wouldn't have the love of my life...
.. without what that man did,
so of course he's going
to have to stay here.
Do you know what? He
might not even get out.
They might not even accept it,
so it might not even be a problem.
But if there's more of a chance...
If it's going to improve
his chances of getting out,
then of course he's going
to have to stay here.
- Oh, God. It's going to be...
- Mm. Terrible.
.. a fucking nightmare, Woody.
Yeah, all right, but it's not...
We've been through worse, haven't we?
- Let's not... - They're
going to hate me. - No!
- They're going to just hate me again.
- No, no, no! I don't think so.
Oh, God! It makes me feel sick, Wood.
- Really makes me feel genuinely like...
- That's not cool.
Have a little time on me...
- .. on me chest-aroo.
- Oh, that's better.
Oh, Christ, I love you. It's
ridiculous, do you know that?
Thanks, Wood. You're the best.
Oh, man!
Oi!
Ah!
The fuck you doing out here?
Just looking at this.
It's beautiful, isn't it?
Yeah.
Better that what we
have back home, isn't it?
If someone, like, from Africa,
who'd never been to England,
and they had to draw a picture,
this is exactly what they'd draw.
A mad one last night, wasn't it?
- Mm, crazy.
- Yeah, it got a bit crazy.
What happened to you? I
didn't see much of you.
Just... around, really.
Cop off?
Little bit, mate, yeah.
The guy with the flaming whip, was it?
- Yeah. - Was it, er, one of
the topless ladies this time?
You wish.
You all right?
Mm.
No, you're not.
I am, Gadg.
Are you OK?
- Yeah. - No, Kelly,
come here, come here.
I'm fine. It's fine.
No, it's not, come here.
What's up with you?
Kel, look at me. Look at me.
- What's up with you? - I'm
all right. - What's up?
I don't want to talk
about it, to be honest.
Come on, what's up?
Come here, what's up with you?
Don't cry.
I'm a fucking slag, Gadget!
What you saying that for?
Cos I am.
Hey, look at me.
(You're not a slag.)
No fucker's hurt you, have they?
If any fucker's hurt you, tell me now.
- No.
- Are you sure?
Just do what I fucking want,
Gadg, that's the fucking problem.
Please don't say that, please.
Love you, babe.
Fucking love you. You know
that as well, don't you?
I always fucking have done, haven't I? Eh?
phone. She's on her way now.
Then it's Kelly and Shaun
from Kelly's mum's at 3:30,
and then it's me, you, the
gang and the open road, mate.
- You moving out?
- Say again.
I said, are you moving out, duck?
No, what you on?
Why have you packed so many bags?
- It's for the rave.
- We're only there for one night.
You said it was a nighter so
I've brought enough for...
Yeah, a nighter. Not a yearer.
Yeah, but, if you think
about it logically,
it's a day, a night, and
then another day and then...
If you're thinking about it logically,
you need underpants, condoms and drugs.
They're in the odds and
sods bag over there.
- That's all you need, then, brother.
That's all you need. - Yeah, but...
- We need provisions, mate.
- Provisions? Like him?
He coming?
- Is he coming?
- Doesn't have to come.
I weren't set on him.
There's a fucking bag within a bag
here. That's a bag inside a bag.
It's for souvenirs, mate.
In case we see owt for Lolly,
Woody and the kids and that.
We're not going to American Adventure.
We're not going to get a picture of
your chops going down the log flume.
We're going to a rave. We're going
to get out our heads, have a mash up.
I'm just trying to think in case we
stay, in case we end up somewhere.
You've thought way too much on this, man.
Way too fucking much.
I'm going to go for a wank
and a shit and a bath.
Downsize it a little bit.
Condense it down a bit, brother,
because that's just ridiculous.
MUSIC: Hallelujah by Happy Mondays
♪ Hallelujah
♪ Hallelujah
♪ Hallelujah
♪ Hallelujah
♪ Hallelujah
♪ Hallelujah. ♪
Ergh.
That was a bit of a wild
one last night, weren't it?
Yeah.
You was a bit wild, anyway.
Do you want me to do some breakfast?
I can do a banging bacon butty.
No, mate, honestly, I've really got to go.
- Fucking hell, is that the time? - Yep.
Well, can I get your number or summat?
I'm...
I'm never really situated
in the same, like, place
so that probably wouldn't really work.
Have I done summat wrong?
No. No. Not at all.
I just work with my mum and my sister
and they're going to fucking
flip so I'd better go.
Nice to meet you, Stu.
Is it there?
Yeah.
Well, come on. Get it open. We
can't eat our dinner till we know.
What if it's a no?
It won't be a no. It'll be a positive.
You were the star pupil on
that drama course, Shaun.
- Word travels fast, don't it?
- It does, yeah.
Well, as long as you know that
I tried even if it is a no.
Brilliant. It's a no.
What?
Little sod! He'll have me at it all day.
We're sorry to inform you
that, after much consideration,
we can't offer you a place
on the photography course
due to the manner in which
you left the drama course
- back in January, 1989. That's
a bloody mistake. - It has to be.
It's not a mistake, is it?
It's right. I left the course.
It's a different course, Shaun. They've...
It doesn't matter what course
it is. It's the same college.
- Shaun, you was in bits over Michelle.
- It doesn't matter.
Like they give a fuck about
that. They're not bothered.
I'm going to get Dr Lenny
to have a word with...
- No, you're not.
- Shaun, you was on anti-depressants.
- It doesn't matter.
- You didn't just bloody swan off.
It doesn't matter. They're not going
to take it into consideration.
- Just leave it at that.
- It does matter.
It doesn't fucking matter! How many times?
It's my fucking life! Not
yours! It's my fault!
I walked off the fucking
course and I'm not bothered!
- I did it to get you off my back anyway!
- Fine. Look, just calm down.
- I don't care! - Fine. - I don't care!
OK. Now calm down, Shaun.
Shaun, love, I'm sorry. All
right, I won't say anything.
It's just the injustice of
it, love. It's not right.
It doesn't matter, Mum.
It says no. End of.
Gadge, what have we got here?
Survival gear, Trev.
Cousin's in the air cadets so
he taught me a thing or two.
We're only going for a day.
Yeah, but, I've heard
about these raves, Trev.
Go for a day thinking, "Yeah,"
you end up at another party,
another party, another party.
Some people end up in
Ibiza and everything, mate.
Yeah, all right, Gary.
- You haven't listened, have you, mate?
- Yeah, I have.
There's still a load of shit here.
There's still a massive pile of shit.
Mate, that's like half of
what you said I couldn't take.
It doesn't matter. There's still too
much there, brother. Way too much.
- It's all essential.
- I can't believe what I'm looking at.
- This is what Trev's got.
- That's it. - That's what you've got.
- You're a bloke. - We need
it! - What do we need here?
- That bag is your sleeping bag, mate.
- Let's get what we need.
- Let's get your... - Sleeping bag,
yeah. - We need that. - Necessity.
- We need a tent to sleep
in, don't we? - Necessity.
But, in terms of, like,
pig chow, sweets...
Mate, we need them, mate, for the road.
- Harvey, don't be a dick!
- Fuck off, mate.
That's my sweets, mate!
One bag of sweets, made!
- Large G&T, please.
- No problem.
- There you are, love.
- Thanks. - Thank you.
- There you are. - Thank
you. - Thank you. - Cheers.
- Right, that's me done.
- All right, cheers.
What's up?
What?
So what am I going to do about Kelly?
Don't be too hard on her, Lol.
She has to do from nine to one,
Mum, yeah? Who can't do them hours?
She's just struggling a bit at the minute.
Struggling with what? What?
Look, she's going away this weekend.
- One final blow out with Gadge
and Harvey and that. - Oh, God.
I'll sit her down on Sunday, have a
proper good word with her. I promise.
She'll be here on time every
fucking day next week with bells on.
- Yeah?
- Yeah, fine.
- You still on for the barbecue later?
- Yeah, definitely.
- Want me to bring owt?
- No. You're good.
- See you later. - Nice
one. Thanks, Mum. - See ya.
Mate, just give her five
minutes. We'll find her.
We can't go without her, can
we, Harv? You're being a nob.
We can, boss. That's the thing. We can.
- Are you taking the piss?
- Come on.
I had my mix in here. Where is it?
She's just forgot that we told her hers.
- She's probably stood outside Shaun's.
- No, she's there.
Oh, there she is, Harv.
- 3:30 at your mum's, Kel.
- What?
3:30 at your mum's. Nice
one. Where the fuck were you?
- At the pub.
- Wicked. Nice one.
- Are you getting in?
- Weren't it 4:30 at Shaun's?
No. It was 3:30 at your mum's.
- Get in, then.
- Erm...
Swing by mine and I'll get ready.
- Absolutely not, no.
- I'll have a shower.
I'll literally be two seconds
and I'll come straight out.
Not happening. Get in the
car or don't get in the car.
- My outfit's on the bed.
- We've been driving round for an hour.
- Get in the car or fuck off.
- Just get in. - You're not coming.
- Come on. - You're taking the
piss? - Absolutely not. Can we go?
I'll be one second. I'll
go in, I'll have a quick...
Listen, you great frigging
twat, get in the car now.
I've been driving round for a
fucking hour. Get in the car.
- Kel, just get in the car. Come on.
- Get in the fucking car.
- So I'm going to go like this?
- Yeah.
I'm not fucking arguing with
you. I'm going. Bye, bye, bye.
- Hold on, then. Stop being
such a prick. - Thank you.
Budge up, you fat...
Budge up, then, you fucking ginge minge.
I'm the only one that's not said owt.
Hold on! I'm not even in the car!
- Have you got a drink?
- Right.
Who likes salmonella?
Yeah!
Who likes violent illness?
Yeah!
Who likes throwing up?
Doo-dee-dee-doo-dee-doo-dee-doo!
Yeah, that's cool. Doing well, there.
- How far can you slide down?
- Whoo!
Oh, you big boy. Have
you brought them out?
- How are you, sweetheart?
- I'm all right.
Give us a kiss.
You've got ketchup on your...
- Don't be like that.
- Get out of it!
- Don't embarrass me! - Get
off! - Don't embarrass me!
Oh, careful.
- What are you doing?
- Tried to kiss me.
You've got tomato sauce all in your...
Yeah, he just kissed me, as well.
Is it bad? How bad is it out of ten?
Oh! Oh! Oh!
You've ruined the day!
- Take a peek on these sweeties.
- Oh, amazing. - Double barrels.
Just like a shotgun.
We'll go full. Me and
you, we'll go full, Gadget.
- Mate, mate, one at least.
- Girls, you go halves on one.
Nah, I reckon I could drop one of them.
Shaun the prawn, you have a 16th.
Yeah?
- Give it a nibble, see
what you think. - Serious.
I know what you're trying to do.
Mate, honestly, it's like
nothing else you've ever had.
It's not like this shit.
It just makes you...
Makes you want to hug
the world, basically.
- This is what you feel like. - This
is it. - All of the time. All the time.
Just love, man. Just love.
Gay, straight, love.
You just want to love.
You want to mix with other people in love.
- Now, then, is everyone full off
impetigo burgers? - Yeah, bloody hell.
- I feel sick but...
- It's just as well.
You'll notice I didn't eat
much during that whole affair.
- Yeah, because you didn't want to get ill.
- I didn't want to get ill.
- That's correct. - But we will. - There's
a reason for not wanting to get ill
because we're going to find out
who the hardest man or woman is
via the medium of arm wrestling.
- This is going to end in disaster.
- I want to watch this.
- Right, ready when you are.
- I'll lay the table. Come on, Nicky. Come on.
Keep hold of the table. I'm on it.
Come on, Nicky! Come on!
- I love his face!
- Come on, Woody!
- You have to touch the table.
- Don't put your head on it.
Honestly, she's really hard.
Come on.
- Oh, no.
- Yes!
Yes.
Straights against lesbians, get on that.
- Is that your wanking hand?
- It is, yeah. - It's really strong.
Pathetic.
Oh!
Ah!
Do it! Do it! Do it!
- Go on, give your mum a hand.
- Oh, shit. He's really strong.
Push it that way.
No. No. No.
I'm not playing!
Erm, I don't want to be funny or anything
but are you sure we're
going the right way,
because it seems a bit familiar, Gadge?
Yeah, no, no, we're on the right track.
That dry wall looks a bit familiar, Gadge.
- We definitely have been
down there, mate. - Yeah, yeah.
- Please do, yeah.
- A to Z.
- You couldn't have got a pocket one?
- Look out, fatty boom boom.
I couldn't get a pocket
one, no. I'm sorry.
- Are you serious?
- What? I need to read it.
I need to match the map with the road.
I know, mate, but you don't have to
put it up on the fucking windscreen.
You're a fucking liability, mate.
Do you even know how to read a map, Gadge?
Listen, I know how to
read a map, mate, right?
That's all you need to know.
- Fucking read it, then.
- I'm reading it. Right.
- What? Right here?
- No, no, no, no, hold on.
We're this green line here.
And, when we get down to this little
yellow line, we go left, right?
- Right, you ready, Milk?
- Er, yeah.
- Don't lick it. - I've got to lick it.
I've got to lick it to stick it on.
Wet it with your finger.
Just going to get that perfectly
between them eyebrows.
Get it right there.
That's the mother. Right there.
Right, ask us some questions.
- It's so you.
- Am I male?
Yes, you are.
Erm, am I... Am I famous?
No.
Well, I don't know.
In the area, amongst certain
females, probably famous.
Am I fat?
- From what I've seen...
- Yeah? - .. pale and tired.
- Am I a penis?
- You are a penis.
But it's in a certain place.
- So close.
- Quite close to where it is now.
You lot are dickheads.
Dickhead!
- Am I female?
- Yes.
Oh, she's a powerful woman.
Well, she's...
- Am I famous?
- Yes, but for all the wrong reasons.
Do you know who she is?
- No. - Maybe not ask
the kids. - Oh, OK.
- Am I Margaret Thatcher?
- No.
- No, boo! - Boo! - Thank fuck for that.
You're worse than Thatcher.
Worse than Thatcher? Shit the bed.
Give us a go on that.
Am I old, then?
- No. No.
- Not old.
I'll give you a clue.
I call you it all the time.
Oh, Myra Hindley.
Shit the bed. Fuck you.
- Gadge, we've fucking been past this.
- We're not!
I'm telling you now, we've been past
that fucking sign about four times.
- There's a place here called Cock End and...
- You're a cock-end.
Mate, if we've been past
Cock End, I'd know about it.
- That mile sign. We've
passed it, Gary. - We've not.
- Yes, we fucking have, mate.
- That milestone? - That mile sign.
That mile thing. That milestone. Past it.
It's the third time passing it, boss.
- You've not been watching the fucking road.
- I swear to God, mate!
I can't watch the road and read the map.
I ask you for one thing and you
don't do fuck all right, do you?
- You watch the road and I...
- I am watching the road.
- You've been doing owt.
- We have to work as a team.
Look, the fucking map's got holes in it.
- Good map, then. - It was the best
we could do. - Well done, Gary.
I swear to God, mate, you're ruining
our fucking lives at the moment.
You have no fucking idea, do you?
You have no idea.
As you can see, I have
brought out my ghetto blaster.
It is not the most technical of devices
but I have maxed up the
volume there. It's on maximum.
I'm about to take you to another galaxy
- and we're going to party like
it's 1999. - Whoo. - Right?
- What's this?
- Erect yourselves.
Oh. Dancing. Do you want to
dance, Milo? You want to dance?
Oh, man.
Eh, you having that?
- Mate, there's too many lines.
- Shut up, Gary. I'm driving here.
There's red, there's blue, there's green.
- I swear to fucking...
- Oi! What's this?
Twat!
Oh, my God. Leave him. Leave him. Stop it.
Now look what you've done,
you fucking stresshead, mate!
- You've got my arm.
- Children!
Like fucking children.
Now the map's gone.
- Fucking hell, lads. - We don't know
where the fuck we are anyway, Gary.
That went too far.
Have a fag if you want a fag.
Cheers, mate.
MUSIC: Fantastic Man by William Onyeabor
Whoa. Careful. Be careful.
Taking turns. Taking turns.
Doing a little routine.
♪ Since I came to know you, baby, yeah
♪ I've been telling you how sweet you are
♪ I've been telling you how good you are
♪ Now you want to try and
tell me how I look... ♪
- Oh. Yay!
- Yay!
♪ You look so good
♪ Fantastic man
I'm drunk, Woods.
I know you are. Don't be scared.
Can you forgive me, Gary, for
what I just did a minute ago?
Yeah, I suppose so,
just sometimes just watch,
do you know what I mean?
- Because now the map's
gone, innit? - I know.
I'm dead sorry for getting
physical and verbally aggressive.
- I am very sorry for it.
- Here you are. Hang on.
There's summat smoking over there.
I think someone's broke down.
- What? - Look. That's bad. - Hang on.
- They might be ravers, though.
- Could be. Could be.
Might know where it is.
- Oh, what a stroke of luck!
- Fuck's sake. - Drive round.
- Help us.
- Just drive past.
Stop.
Oh, holy Jesus.
Higgy, I know these people.
- Get out the car.
- Harvey. - How you doing?
Oh, it's amazing to see you, my friend.
How are you?
- Better than your car.
- Gary. Hello.
- Hello, Kelly. - Gadge.
- You all right, mate?
Is that boob juice you've
got all over your top there?
Kelly,
bless you, my child.
Oh, for fuck's sake.
What are you doing here?
I'm with my mates.
If I had some metal now...
Little bastard.
- You broke down, have you, Flip?
- Well, you... Kind of.
Well, it's more like
just cooling down a bit.
It's heating up, mate, that. It's bad.
Well, it's a purring dragon.
Sometimes he just needs to land,
fold his wings and just calm down a bit.
- So, where you going, Harv?
- Where you going, Flip?
- Ah, to the rave up.
- Ah. - Nice, yeah.
Yeah, Higgy loves a
rave, don't you, Higgy?
- Guilty.
- Yeah.
- He was nearly in tears till
we saw you, yeah. - Where is it?
- Nearly let him down. Same place you're going.
- Where is it, though?
Yeah, we'd have met there, wouldn't we?
You tell us where and we'll
come back, bring rescue.
- It's local, innit?
- But where?
Oh, right. Do you not...
- Do you not know where you're going?
- Yeah. Just it's...
- No, we don't, Flip. No, we ain't
got a clue, boss. - Oh, right.
Are you going to tell us?
If I tell you where the rave is,
you're going to deny us a lift
- in that spastic wagon.
- Mate, we'll get someone from the rave.
Listen, listen, come on.
- There's no room.
- We ain't not going to that rave.
- You shut up.
- We ain't not going.
Just look at the ground.
Look at the ground.
I'm in the front, mate. They
can fuck off if they think...
- One of yous is in the boot.
- Ginge. - No, fuck off, mate.
- I'm already in the back.
- Shaun, you're smaller than me.
- You get in the boot, Shaun.
Come on, Shaun. - No, mate.
Harvey, make Shaun get in the boot.
Carry on and you'll have no fucking lift.
- Let me know when you get
there, yeah? - Sarcasm.
- Oh, my God.
- Move up, that's right.
Ow.
You feel that in your side, Kelly?
- Everybody in?
- It's man log.
You didn't know where
it was, did you, Flip?
I thought I did, and...
It wasn't a wind up, honest, Harv, and...
I wanted to take you to your rave and...
I feel like I've let you all down.
We didn't know were it was anyway,
boss, don't worry about it.
That's very kind of you all, thanks.
- Shall we piss off then? - Ugh! - Mate!
- What else we going to do?
- There's no point in going home to do nothing.
- We've got beer and that.
- Stay in the fucking woods?
Yeah, build a little fire out
of drift wood, we'll be f...
There's no point driving all the way
back home to do fuck all, is there?
- Come on!
- We've got our pills.
- Do you all really fancy it?
- Yeah!
Why not? Whack some music on and that.
Fuck it, we'll stay here
then. If you want, mate,
I'll take you back to your car
and you can piss off and all.
Well...
I don't mind hanging with you guys...
and your party in the woods.
Please don't take me back there, Harvey.
It's like American Werewolf
in Yorkshire out there.
Truth is, mate, we ain't
got enough pills for you.
Oh, we... we've bought pills
to the table, Harvey! Yeah!
- Pack of 30.
- Pack of 30 what?
Pro Plus.
Different thing, we've got a
completely different thing.
Three or four of them
and you're up all night.
Don't make us leave!
- Shit! - How long's he been in there?!
- Fuck knows, man. - Fucking ages!
Swore he was right here!
- Fucking hell, mate!
- Hig!
- All right, dude?
- Here he is!
I'm fine, me brother used
to lock me in the cupboard,
sometimes for hours on end and that,
- so I'm quite good in small spaces.
- Fair play to you.
Happy times.
Let us stay, mate?
I promise I'll behave myself.
I'll keep these bad boys to myself.
Fuck it, I feel really sorry for you
boys, but it ain't just up to me.
That's the thing, like.
You reckon?
Come on, guys.
Can't leave them on their
own. We can get a few in car.
Go on, then. Fine!
- Let's get very happy, though.
- You're in. - Brilliant.
- Aww. That's really great of you.
- Enjoy yourself.
Have half of this, though. If it's
your first time, I'd have half.
Lads, I'm pretty big, and I
feel I can handle a full one.
Honestly, mate, I'm telling you the truth.
Just hang on, have half first.
OK, I trust you, hombre. I trust you guys.
- Thanks. - Gadgy. - Cheers.
- OK, Wow. - Shaun, just have
half with me to start off with.
- I'll have less than half, mate.
- Yeah, he needs less that half.
- Fuck off! - To the
night, guys. - To the night!
- Guys, here we go.
- To the night in the woods.
- To a night in the woods!
- OK.
- Can I have a bit of that drink, Trev?
- Before you, Ginge. Jesus.
Have you just done yours with out a drink?
Oh, no, you still have it.
It taste like fucking shite.
Yeah, I'm not feeling anything,
Harvey. I can handle a full one.
I promise you, give it time, mate.
I'd say, half an hour at least,
and you'll be off your head.
- Brilliant. - Shall I put
some music on, then? - Yeah.
The Ginger Ginge!
- Shall I put some Roses on?
- Yeah.
Where about's are they, Harv?
- Down in floor, they were down
near my foot. - Can't find it.
Oh, hang on, mate.
Is it the one with the red cover on?
Hang on, hang on. Shh, shh, shh.
Wait, listen. Can you hear that?
It's, like, drumming or something.
- I can hear that, Trev.
- We've found it, haven't it?
Fuck!
- Ladies and gentlemen....
- Fucking hell, boys and girls.
We're fucking here!
FUCK YES!
- Beautiful, man!
- I told you I'd take you there!
I told you!
Let's do this!
What the fuck?!
That's not it, is it?
There's nowhere near 2,000 there, mate.
Is that a wigwam?
This definitely isn't it.
Looks like a fucking seance!
Well, a party's, a party, isn't it?
Yeah, but, we can't all
go in there like this,
- we'll stand out like a sore thumb!
- Has she got her tits out?
- What?
- Loads of tits out, mate.
Yeah, some are nice.
Some are not so nice and long.
Jesus. Free tits, Harv!
- Do you reckon we have it or what?
- Fuck it, I'll suck anything!
Come on, then!
Party!
She's pissed!
Fucking hell!
Groovy shirt, man! Yeah!
- Can I touch your stuff?
- She's got her tits out!
Please let me touch you tits.
This bit. Just this bit.
Don't touch her, Gadge, she'll chop
your hand off! Chop your hand off.
I want to touch it...
'Do you really want to
jump? Do you want to?
'Well, that's fine with me.
Come on. Let's do it, asshole.
- 'Wait a minute! Wha... - I want to
do it. - Wait... What do you mean?!
'Oh!'
- (Get it.) - No way. - (Go on.)
I'm just too tired, I am, Lol.
- Get the phone, Woody.
- No, it's me mum and dad.
Yeah, of course it's your mum and dad.
No, I've had enough of them now.
Woody, get the phone. I'm not
talking to your mum for an hour.
Hello?
Yeah...
Right, let me just nip upstairs
and I'll take the phone up there.
All right, just one sec.
- Right, Woody, it's me mum.
- Mm.
- When I shout, put the phone down.
Are you listening? - Mm-hm. - Yeah?
- Yeah?
- Yes.
Right, put it down then, Wood.
Woody!
- Quick.
- I'm doing it!
It's down.
Hi, you all right?
No. Milky's here, so I couldn't talk.
Come on, then, what's up?
You sound really stressed.
Tell me what's up, Combo.
♪ You could take my time
♪ And make it matter
♪ Make it matter
♪ To me
♪ You could turn my head
♪ You could turn my thought... ♪
- Are you having a nice time?
- I like this.
♪ Make it matter
♪ You make it matter... ♪
This is great. This is great.
I love ecstasy!
♪ I'll never...
♪ Feel this young... ♪
Is it too soon to say that
I think I might love you?
♪ You can take my time
♪ And make it matter
♪ You can take my time
♪ And make it real
♪ You can...
♪ Come on, I need...
♪ Oh, you know you need me
♪ Oh, no, I know you need me
♪ I'll never... ♪
That's amazing.
♪ Feel this young
♪ I'll never
♪ Feel this young
♪ I'm feeling older
♪ I'm feeling older
♪ I'm feeling older
♪ I'm feeling older
♪ I'm feeling older
♪ Yeah, yeah, older, older
♪ I'm getting older
♪ Yeah, yeah, older, old... ♪
- Hello! - Hiya. - How are you?
- I'm good, thanks. How are you?
- I'm very good.
Do you want to come in?
I'd... I'd love to, and to
be invited, it's special.
Come in!
Oh, yeah.
- It's gone a bit mental out
there, hasn't it? - Yeah.
- Mmm. It's good, though!
- Yeah, it is.
It's very ni... It's
nice out there, isn't it?
- Yeah.
- Just everyone....
Just happy, like.
- Yeah, just doing what
they need to do. - Yeah.
- You coming in for a bit of quiet?
- Well... Well...
I won't lie to you, I was...
I was going past for a piss.
- Yeah. - I was going
past for a wee. Excuse me.
- Gadg! Give us a beer, my friend.
- For, you mate.
- Do you know what? I love you.
- This is fucking nice, this.
- I know. I know, it's wonderful.
- You all right?
Love you, mate!
Yeah, it's... It's special here,
like, it's so different you know,
- to anything else.
- Yeah.
'If you would kindly tell me
'everything you know, I
promise I'll kill you quick.'
'I've told you everything I know.'
(Wood?)
(Woody?)
- Woody?
- Ungh!
So, like, I know it's rude
to ask, and I shouldn't,
but can I ask how old are you are?
I'm 47.
- 47?
- Mm.
Wow. You're literally, like,
five years older than my dad.
I know... I didn't'
mean any offence, like...
- I don't take any offence!
- No, no offence. - Yeah.
But...
- Like...
- Do you get on with your dad?
I di... I di... Yeah.
Course, yeah. I fucking love him to bits.
But he's not here anymore, he passed away.
Aww, I'm sorry to hear that.
It happens, like, it happens.
My dad was... He was a fighter
in the war and he bought me up a fighter.
You know, like, he was one of them that...
Like, I know he can see me
now, like he's looking from
above and he's looking at me and you.
He's thinking, "Fucking go on,
boy," that's what he's thinking.
And he was a fighter, and that's
what I've always had in me,
- and he was a brave man.
- Yeah.
Like, he fought for the country,
he fought in the Falklands and...
He was just a brave man, and
that's what he brought me up to be,
and if he'd have been
looking down on me now,
if I was sat here, laying down there
crying, he'd look at me and he'd go,
"Shaun, fucking hell. Sort it out.
What you doing what you crying for?
"Crying's not going to bring
me back." It doesn't, you know?
But if he'd have seen me down here,
you know, having the time of me
life and sat here having fun...
He'd be, like I say, he'd be sat
there going, "Fucking, Shaun,
- "love you to bits, mate."
- Yeah. So he's with you all the time.
All the time, all the time. But...
And how old where you when he passed?
- I would have been 11, 12.
- Oh, right! - Young. - Yeah.
I was young, and er, like...
- I understand death at that
age, obviously, but... - Yeah.
It's just one of them things, isn't it?
- There's nothing you
can do about it. - No.
But you miss him?
- Yeah, obviously.
- Yeah.
There you are.
Are you OK?
Are you all right?
Are you OK?
♪ Everybody speaks
♪ But nobody hears
♪ Everybody speaks
♪ Nobody hears
♪ They waste days
♪ They waste years
♪ I'm the first
♪ I'm the last
♪ I'm the future
♪ I'm the past
♪ Let the prime numbers rise
♪ Let the prime numbers rise
♪ This is God's song
♪ Somebody listen
♪ Do you speak my language?
♪ Has the spirit risen?
♪ I will protect you
♪ I will guide
♪ I will bless when you take my side
♪ This is God's song
♪ Let demons fly
♪ It's you, you, you, you, you
♪ Yeah...
♪ And obviously I
♪ And obviously I
♪ And obviously I
♪ And obviously I
♪ This is God's song...
♪ This is the country
♪ This is the drug
♪ This is pain...
♪ Of the beginning...
♪ This is a god's song
♪ I let you go
♪ Slip away, slip away, slip away
♪ This is God's song...
♪ This is the country
♪ This is the drop
♪ This is pain...
♪ Of the beginning...
♪ This is a god's song
♪ I let you go
♪ Slip away, slip away, slip away
♪ The click of my fingers
♪ Goes well with thunder
♪ I think you don't know
♪ The curse you're under
♪ Kingdom come...
♪ I'm the heavens
♪ I'm the sun
♪ This is a god's song
♪ You'll be obtained
♪ You'll be reared
♪ This is a god's song
♪ Let demons fly
♪ It's you, you, you, you you!
♪ But obviously I
♪ And obviously I
♪ And obviously I
♪ And obviously I
♪ I'm coming, I'm coming
♪ I'm coming, I'm coming
♪ I'm coming, I'm coming
♪ I'm coming, I'm coming
♪ And obviously I. ♪
I love you so much. You know that?
♪ This is a god's song... ♪
I love you so much. So much.
I love you so much.
You know that? I love you
so much. You know that?
I love you so much.
Dad?
Dad...
♪ Ooooh, oooooh, oooooh
♪ Oooooh, oooooh
♪ Ooooh...
♪ Ooooh, oooooh, oooooh
♪ Ooooh, oooooh
♪ Oooooh...
♪ Oooooh
♪ Here it comes. ♪
- (Morning.)
- Where have you been?
(Fucking down there on couch with him.)
- Why? - Because you didn't
wake me up, you bastard!
Fucking hell!
- Is he still down there?
- Of course he's still there.
He's like a turd that won't flush.
- That's all the food gone, then.
- I've hid it.
- Where?
- In the tumble drier.
Ew! Won't want to eat that now.
It's the only place he
won't think to look.
He will. He'll sniff it out.
Is your mum all right?
- Yeah, why? - She rang last
night. I thought maybe...
Maybe Nikki had got her dildo
stuck all the way up inside her.
- No.
- Was trying to spoon it out.
Oh, Woody, don't! Don't!
You're disgusting.
I'm sorry.
No, it weren't my mum on
the phone. It was Combo.
Oh, fucking hell.
Is he all right?
- No, not really. - Is he not? - No.
He was a bit... bit teary, to be honest.
- Teary? - Yeah. - Was he?
- Well, he's... he's trying to
get out, isn't he? - Mm. - Yeah.
Only it didn't go very well last time and,
well, he was telling me about all
this stuff that he's got to get
together and, you know, what they
expect of him if he gets parole....
Go on, I can feel something.
- Yeah.
- Come on, then.
Well, he needs stability, he
needs people for when he's out
cos he hasn't got anyone,
so he's obviously got...
Drop the bomb. Let's have the bomb.
He needs somewhere to live.
There it is. There it is.
Well, we got a year of happiness.
Didn't we? Fucking hell.
Well, I've said... I've not
said, like, defo yes...
- I've said I'd talk to you about it.
- Of course.
- Of course he's going to have to stay here.
- What do you mean?
He's going to have to stay here,
of course he is. Lollipop...
- You wouldn't mind
Combo moving in? - No.
It's going to be messy,
but I think... Well...
I wouldn't have a son, would
I? I wouldn't have Jimmy...
.. I wouldn't have the love of my life...
.. without what that man did,
so of course he's going
to have to stay here.
Do you know what? He
might not even get out.
They might not even accept it,
so it might not even be a problem.
But if there's more of a chance...
If it's going to improve
his chances of getting out,
then of course he's going
to have to stay here.
- Oh, God. It's going to be...
- Mm. Terrible.
.. a fucking nightmare, Woody.
Yeah, all right, but it's not...
We've been through worse, haven't we?
- Let's not... - They're
going to hate me. - No!
- They're going to just hate me again.
- No, no, no! I don't think so.
Oh, God! It makes me feel sick, Wood.
- Really makes me feel genuinely like...
- That's not cool.
Have a little time on me...
- .. on me chest-aroo.
- Oh, that's better.
Oh, Christ, I love you. It's
ridiculous, do you know that?
Thanks, Wood. You're the best.
Oh, man!
Oi!
Ah!
The fuck you doing out here?
Just looking at this.
It's beautiful, isn't it?
Yeah.
Better that what we
have back home, isn't it?
If someone, like, from Africa,
who'd never been to England,
and they had to draw a picture,
this is exactly what they'd draw.
A mad one last night, wasn't it?
- Mm, crazy.
- Yeah, it got a bit crazy.
What happened to you? I
didn't see much of you.
Just... around, really.
Cop off?
Little bit, mate, yeah.
The guy with the flaming whip, was it?
- Yeah. - Was it, er, one of
the topless ladies this time?
You wish.
You all right?
Mm.
No, you're not.
I am, Gadg.
Are you OK?
- Yeah. - No, Kelly,
come here, come here.
I'm fine. It's fine.
No, it's not, come here.
What's up with you?
Kel, look at me. Look at me.
- What's up with you? - I'm
all right. - What's up?
I don't want to talk
about it, to be honest.
Come on, what's up?
Come here, what's up with you?
Don't cry.
I'm a fucking slag, Gadget!
What you saying that for?
Cos I am.
Hey, look at me.
(You're not a slag.)
No fucker's hurt you, have they?
If any fucker's hurt you, tell me now.
- No.
- Are you sure?
Just do what I fucking want,
Gadg, that's the fucking problem.
Please don't say that, please.
Love you, babe.
Fucking love you. You know
that as well, don't you?
I always fucking have done, haven't I? Eh?