The Wonder Years (2021–…): Season 1, Episode 14 - Country Dean - full transcript

In Alabama,
what most people called

"Spring Break"
was called A.E.A.

It had something to do with
a week-long

teachers conference,
blah, blah, blah, blah.

All we cared about
was no school.

Lots of my friends went on
trips with their families

to the mountains or the beach,

but I was gonna spend my
vacation in my happy place...

On the couch,
in front of the TV.

I planned to eat cereal
till my teeth fell out

and watch cartoons
till my eyeballs fell out.



Basically, if something
didn't fall out, I failed.

- Get dressed, Dean.
- And pack your suitcase.

W-What?
It's my vacation.

I've been looking forward
to it for weeks.

Change of plans.

We're going to visit
Grandpa and Grandma's farm.

We're going
to the country?!

Whyyyyyy?!

Contrary to popular belief,
there's a difference

between growing up
in "the South"

and growing up in
"the Country."

I did the former.
My mom and dad did the latter.

This is how I grew up.

And this was them.



My groceries.

Their groceries.

My chores.

Their chores.

Okay, that last one may have
been over a hundred years ago,

but that's how old
they seemed to me.

My point...
We were not the same.

Your Grandpa called
and said he needed

my help with something.

And as you know,
family always comes first.

But I-I planned
out my whole week.

There's a good episode
of The Beverly Hillbillies.

Jethro gets
a pet kangaroo.

Grandma and Grandpa
don't even have a TV.

It's so boring there.

Don't you dare call
my parents "boring."

It's been a minute
since we visited,

and it'd be good for you
to spend some time with them.

Don't get me wrong... I loved
Grandma Bessie and Big Jim,

especially
when they visited us.

But going to the country
was a pain.

And the fresh air
will do you good.

I hate the fresh air.

Oh, please don't say that
in front of my mother.

She doesn't need
any more ammunition

to judge my parenting.

You two have
a complicated relationship.

Well, it's tricky
with mothers and daughters.

I'm all packed.

If that little piece of cloth
is what you call "clothing,"

then clearly, I need to check
everything else

in your little suitcase.

What? You don't trust me
to do anything.

If you're referring to that trip
with your friends,

then the answer's
still no.

I'm going to college
soon.

Why can't you let me go away
for one weekend?

What's the difference?

The difference is college

is not in
the back of a van

driven by
a boy named Kwame.

And pack your boots.
You're gonna be helping

your Grandpa
in the fields.

- Could you at least...
- Are you serious?!

And just like that,
my dreams

of a week off from school
were shattered.

Instead, I was going
to experience

two of the unhappiest words in
the English language...

"No TV."

♪ All I know ♪

♪ Ohhh ♪
*THE WONDER YEARS *

♪ Through
the highs and the lows ♪

♪ I'mma find my way home
Season 01 Episode 14

Episode: Title "Country Dean"
Aired on: February 23, 2022.

After three hours in the car,

two fights between Mom and Kim,
and one pee break,

we pulled up
to the family homestead.

Where are
my grand-babies?

- I need some hugs.
- Hey, Grandma.

- Hey, Grandpa.
- Look at you.

Kim, when did you
turn into a woman?

And is this Dean?
Oh, my goodness.

You've got even more handsome!

Lillian, are you feeding
these children?

- They're so skinny!
- Feed them.

I knew I was forgetting
something.

I hope y'all don't talk
to your parents

as fresh as your mama
talks to me.

Bessie, great to
see you, too.

I brought something
for you.

- Oh.
- My latest 45.

How sweet.
'Course I can't play it,

'cause it's
the devil's music.

But I am going
to hang it up

so I can brag
on my talented son-in-law!

- All right.
- I'm glad you're here, Bill.

I could really use
your help.

She's about ready
to drive.

Still need to replace
all the fluids.

And I'll make sure
that me and you

stay well-lubricated,
too.

You the boss, Big Jim.

Daddy, is that
why you brought us here?

To sip on whiskey
and work on that old jalopy?

No, no, we've got
a real problem.

Let's discuss it
over some sweet tea.

We're so glad
you're here, baby.

You look good.

Yes, you do.

I guess you're enjoying
all those salons

you're spending
all your money on up there.

No way!

Maybe this wasn't gonna be
as bad as I thought!

Hold your horses.
We only turn that on

for two programs...
The news and Lawrence Welk.

Nope, it was exactly as bad
as I thought.

Maybe just one cartoon?

Won't be having you use up
all our electricity.

I hope that rule doesn't apply
to the telephone.

They'd have to sell
the farm

to cover
your long-distance bill.

So, we got some trouble
with the neighbors.

They say our cow has been
coming onto their property

to graze, and they want
to build a fence to stop her.

Big fuss over nothing!

I don't know why they think
it's their land.

It's always been our land.

Well, they don't agree.

And they done gone
and hired a lawyer.

Why'd they have to get
a lawyer involved?

My cow is pregnant.

She doesn't need
the agitation.

She's eating for two.

She needs as much grass
as she can get!

Still, it would be good
for you to take a look

at what the lawyers
sent us.

Don't bother Lillian
with that!

It's just a couple
of letters.

Well, what does it say?

They all say
the same thing.

I don't have time
to read every last one.

It's planting season.

Which is harder now
because the clock's

moving forward because
of your President Johnson.

Oh, so now
I'm wrong for voting.

Without television,
watching them fight

was the most entertaining show
around.

Still,
Mama was no Shecky Greene.

Well, you can't
keep ignoring this.

I'd be happy
to take care of it.

We appreciate it.

"Take care of it"?

Which means "take over."

That's just like her, trying to
control everybody.

Kim, don't be disrespectful
to your mother.

Wonder where she learned
that from.

Bessie, our daughter is as smart
as any lawyers.

Let her help.

At least Mama
had something to do.

I was already bored.

Okay.
Time to get to work.

Dean, come on.

You might learn a thing or two
from your Grandpa.

Ugh! Can't you see
I'm busy being bored?

Mm, mm.

Transmission fluid
tastes burnt.

Could be a crack
in the fluid line.

Don't worry.
It won't hurt him.

But too much of this will
definitely make you go blind.

Years later,

when I took a sip
from Grandpa's flask,

I got the joke.

Then I threw up
and passed out.

Ahh.

Dean, look,
your cousins are coming.

Well, some were cousins,
some were second cousins,

some were cousins
of my play cousins...

I-I never knew for sure.

Like I said, country.

They're gonna help me
shuck corn.

You wanna come?

Go. It'll do you good
to reconnect with them.

And I pay
a dime a bushel.

A day with
my country cousins?

I'd rather drink a gallon
of transmission fluid.

But it didn't seem like
I had much of a choice.

So, you live
in Montgomery, right?

- What's that like?
- It's okay.

What do you do for fun?

Um...
baseball, I guess.

If we make the finals,
we get to play

in Paterson Field,

where the Montgomery Rebels
play.

Hmm.

Yeah, my team's
really counting on me.

I bat around .800.

I just made
my third All-Star team.

Whoa, cool!

All right, all right,
I was basically describing

my brother Bruce, but these
kids would never know that.

Yep, I got some high school
coaches interested in me.

Of course
I have a girlfriend!

Her name's Keisa.

She's the prettiest girl
in school. Crazy about me.

Sure, I go to concerts
all the time.

I even get a chance to play
with my dad's band

whenever he needs
a soloist.

As we got comfortable
with each other,

my cousins shared details
of their "embellished" lives.

Well, that's cool.

We mostly do
stuff outdoors.

Like jumping our dirt-bikes
off that 20-foot hill.

The mounts aren't back yet,
but the taxidermist says

it's the biggest buck
he's ever seen.

When I turn 14
next month,

I'm gonna get
my driver's license.

No way.

They call it
an agricultural license.

So we can drive tractors
on the road and stuff.

Motorcycles, too.

Okay, that actually sounded
legit.

And pretty cool.
I had to keep up!

Uh, yeah,
my dad's teaching me

to drive right now.

So he can send me out
for a pack of smokes

whenever he needs to.

Your dad, Bill Williams,
teaching you to drive now?

Grandad.

Right, right.
Of course he is.

Well, there you go.

So, we gonna see you
tomorrow, Dean?

Sure will.
Oh, and call me "DJ."

'Cause my middle name
starts with a "J."

That's what everybody calls me
back in Montgomery.

Yeah, nobody ever called me
that.

But I felt like a cool cousin
from the city

should have
a cool nickname.

Come on, uh... DJ.

Time to get back
to the house.

Planting season
continues to progress...

Is that Green Acres?!

Nope.
Morning farm report

on the news.
You wanna watch?

A show about a farm that doesn't
have a pig who can drive?

No, thanks.

- Morning, Big Jim.
- Morning.

Dean, wanna come
ride bikes?

We got one for you, too.

At least that's
kind of similar

to what I'd be doing at home.

You guys make your bikes
yourselves?

Yeah, there's always parts
lying around.

Oh. I just get a new bike
whenever I outgrow my old one.

You mean whenever you outgrow
Bruce's old one?

All right.

Here you go.

Where are
we gonna ride?

I dunno.
Where do you ride at home?

Oh, all over the city.

But if I was at home
right now,

I'd be sitting
in front of a TV

until my eyes dried out.

You get to watch
that much TV?

Well, yeah,
when school's out.

I don't see how you guys survive
without it.

I mean, some of us
have TVs,

but not ones we can watch
all the time.

We have four.

Whoa! There's only one place
I know with that many.

Where?

That's the episode
where Mrs. Kravitz

thinks Darrin and Samantha
have a baby.

My neighbor in Montgomery,
Ms. Stringer,

is nosy just like that.

Ooh! And that's the one
where Gomer and Sergeant Carter

lose the Colonel's dog.

I'm not saying they stole
the idea,

but same thing happened
to me and my friend Cory.

Oh, and that?
That's The Mod Squad,

where they catch
car thieves.

Just like the crime
in Montgomery.

I'm telling you exactly what
they said at the courthouse...

There's no record
of you owning this land!

What do you call this?

My mama's grandad was
a sharecropper on this land.

He bought it from the man
that owned it...

Paid him a little each month
till it was his,

free and clear.
The proof's right here.

I got a map, too.

Here is the boundary between us
and the neighbor's.

Goes from the creek
to the rock pile

to the walnut tree...
The tree's gone,

but you can still
see the stump.

Yeah, I-I don't think the county
is gonna accept that.

Why'd you need to get
the government involved?!

Next thing you know,
they're gonna make us pay taxes!

I'm gon' pretend like I didn't
just hear that.

Uh...

what I think we should do
is get a lawyer.

Bill and I can help
pay for it.

Wait. What now?

This one of those lawyers
we can pay

with a chicken
or something?

Oh, so it's not enough for you
to stir up trouble,

now you're gonna start throwing
your money around?

We're not throwing
money around.

We just want to help out.
Right, Bill?

Of course. Right.

I'll go up to three chickens,
but that's it.

You're gonna love this, DJ.

We jump into there...

from up there.

There's no way
you guys actually do that.

I know
you're not scared, DJ.

Yeah, this is nothing compared
to the gunfire

you said you fall asleep to
in Montgomery.

And the interstate highway
you said you walk across

to get to school.

DJ! DJ! DJ! DJ! DJ!

It shouldn't have mattered.

It was just a childish dare.

But I felt like
all my previous arguments

about how I was growing up
was better

than how
they were growing up

rested on me proving
there was nothing they could do

that I couldn't.

It all came down
to this moment.

DJ! DJ! DJ!
DJ! DJ! DJ!

Aww!

DJ?

Grandma, you made all this
by yourself?

Said she didn't want
any help.

I didn't think you'd have
the energy to cook

after a day of meddling
in people's business.

And you stripped all that corn
the kids shucked

without breaking a nail?

Uh-oh. We got another city gal
on our hands.

Well, sweetie,
let me fix your plate.

Oh, the patriarchy's
alive and well.

She only doing this to compete
with her mother.

Don't overthink it, son.

Enjoy it till it's over.

Bill, I made
those buttermilk biscuits

because I know
you love 'em.

Well, you know, Mama, I use
that same recipe.

My recipe's different.

It's not written down
like yours.

Well, I learned it
from watching you,

so I don't see
how it's different.

Because writing it down
makes it taste different.

Now I see
where Mama gets it from.

But do you see
where you get it from?

Don't you agree, Bill?

Well... I think everybody's
biscuits are perfect.

It's over.

So, Bill,
you'll be leaving soon.

Let's finish up the car
after supper.

She should be ready to drive
by morning.

Grandpa was right.

We'd be going home soon.

Time was running out
for me to redeem myself.

I had one shot to prove
to my cousins

that my city life
was superior.

Whoa, DJ!
You really can drive!

Of course I can, guys.

I told you, I do it
all the time. No biggie.

It was a moment
of pure triumph.

And you know what?
Driving a car

was a lot easier
than I thought.

As if a whooping
wasn't enough punishment

for my automotive mishap,
my grandparents gave me

the worst farm chore
of all.

Come on, now.
The manure's

not gonna shovel itself.

Mama, I spoke to the lawyer,
and he's got a solution.

He can get you a deed
for the land

based on proof
of continued residency.

And the neighbors have agreed to
give you an easement.

What does that mean?

It means they own
the land in dispute,

but they'll let you use it
for the cow to graze.

All you have to do
is sign these papers.

What kind of
solution is that?

I ain't gonna
give them my land!

It's been in my family
for generations.

Mama, a map drawn
on the back

of a 1904 Sears catalog

is not gonna hold up
in a court of law.

I ain't gonna give 'em this land
without a fight.

And we know
you love to fight.

What does that mean?

Ever since I've been here,
you've had something to say

about every little thing
I do.

'Cause you come in here thinking
you're better than us!

You're not the only one
smart enough to go to college.

Mama, we know.

We know that college
wasn't an option

for a Black woman
when you were coming up.

College was
an option for me.

I was gonna study
veterinary medicine at A&M.

But your grandma
wouldn't let me go.

Told the admissions man
that she needed me

too much
here on the farm.

Well, why couldn't
Big Granny see

that it would've been better
for you in the long run?

'Cause she'd never seen
anybody do it.

So I made sure
I worked damn hard here

so I'd get to see
somebody do it.

And, Mama,
I appreciate it.

But you can't be blaming me

for what I had nothing
to do with.

I know you appreciate
what I gave you.

But sometimes...

it's hard to see
from three hours away.

Grandma,
is Lurleen okay?

She's probably in labor.

Oh, no.
It's breeched.

What's that mean?

Baby's coming out
backwards.

She needs our help.

Uh, Lillian,
get me the...

Already got it.
Is the cord wrapped?

Doesn't look like it.

But the water bag
ain't broke yet.

Need to get in there
and pop it.

No, not with
your arthritis.

Let me do it.

I hardly recognized you.

Yeah, it all
just came back to me.

How long has it been,
20 years?

At least.

Well, Mama,
I want you to know

there is no amount of time
or distance

that will take this place
out of me.

That's nice, baby.

But you gotta toughen
that boy up.

That's for sure!

I should've put a blanket down
for him!

Mama and Grandma
were finally united...

In making fun of me.

But it made me realize that
I was guilty

of what Grandma
accused Mama of.

I'd been approaching my time
in the country all wrong.

I realized that part of
this place was in me,

just like it was in Mama,

and I shouldn't have been
trying to run from that

all this time.

So on my last day,
I let my cousins awaken

the "Country Dean" in me.

You want to squeeze
the trigger.

Don't jerk it.

Bam!

We should call you
"Eagle Eye DJ."

Nah. "Dean" is fine.

So, guess you'll be happy
getting back

to all the things you do
in Montgomery.

Actually, I can't wait
till we come back here.

Can we name
the calf Melvin?

And can I help take care of him
the next time I come?

- Oh, sure.
- Yes!

Put those
in the trunk, son.

We'll be right out.

Look like next time,
we'll have some body work

to do on the car,
thanks to Dean.

Goes to show
how good a job we did

on that transmission...

A 12-year-old
could drive it.

- Mm-hmm.
- Uh-huh.

Where are
the easement papers?

Mom, did you...

I signed them.

I figure it's
the only way to end

this business
you stirred up.

Let's go home, baby.

Uh, excuse me.

Uh, we just stopped by
to pick up some papers.

Oh.
Are you the neighbors?

Yeah, I'm Gerald.
This is my wife, Edith.

- Hi.
- Hi, I'm Lillian.

Ah. "The" Lillian.

What do you mean?

Your mama will not
stop bragging on you.

No offense, but everyone
in town is sick and tired

of Bessie talking about
her big-shot daughter

- in the city!
- Mm-hmm.

Is that so?

Yes, Mama, I just wanted to let
you know we got home safe.

I know.
I miss you already, too.

I never understood
how Mama and Grandma

would be so mean
to each other,

then cry about how
they'd miss each other so much.

And, no, I'm not trying
to waste up

all your electricity.

I'mma hang up now.
Love you.

Kim, that is not
how you slice a tomato!

Cut against the core...

You know what?

Nothing wrong
with your way.

You just keep on
being you.

Um... okay.

Those don't look like chickens
we buy from the store.

It isn't.
They're from the farm.

Wh... Lucy and Peggy?!

They were my friends.

Better not tell him
he gon' be

eating Melvin
in two years.

Captioned by VITAC...