The West Wing (1999–2006): Season 3, Episode 19 - Enemies Foreign and Domestic - full transcript

A meeting with the new Russian president becomes politically dangerous when surveillance photos show Russia building a nuclear reactor in Iran. C.J. is assigned Secret Service protection after receiving death threats.

Tell me what the problem is, Toby.

I'm Sam, sir. I'm the
deputy communications director.

I'm Leo McGarry,
White House chief of staff.

- I'm personal aide to the president.
- I'm a speechwriter.

I'm the deputy chief of staff.

Which, I guess, makes me
deputy deputy chief of staff.

I'm the press secretary.
It's an unavoidable conflict of interest.

I'm Josiah Bartlet.
I'm president of the U.S.

Whoever's on the printer, get off.

- That's me.
- Get off!

You wanna make it clear we're
pushing for Slovenia...

...and possibly the Baltic states:
Estonia, Latvia, Lithuania.

- We're gonna leave Fredonia out?
- Point is, the zero option's off the table.

Can we please?

Aren't we pretty much admitting the
countries we formed NATO to fight?

- Yes.
- Then why not dissolve it?

- We like the bomber jackets.
- When you joke...

- My jokes are funny.
- Fredonia was good.

- Heard it.
- Give you $500 if you do...

..."Lydia the Tattooed Lady"
at the Gridiron.

Can we talk about sugar subsidies?

We're not done
talking about summit.

- It's a two-day grip and grin.
- You of all people.

The Russians finally elect
a reformer and you still...

20 years in the KGB? An election
that would make Tammany Hall...

...Iook like the League of Women Voters?
I'm not sure that qualifies as a... .

- C.J.?
- There was a fire... the King Fatah Middle School
in Medina.

Seventeen girls died in the fire when
they were prevented from coming out...

...and rescue workers
were prevented from saving them.

- What was preventing them?
- The muttawa.

The girls weren't dressed properly.

Don't comment.

I haven't spoken to the president,
to Leo, to State, to anybody.

You wanna muzzle me before I go in
there? Speak now or hold your peace.

God knows it's not likely I'm gonna.

Let's get a good spot.

- Good morning.
- Good morning.

I have some schedule details
on the summit.

Air Force One will depart
Andrews at 7 p.m. Friday...

...arriving in Helsinki 4 a.m. Eastern time.
That's 11 a.m. Saturday, local.

Presidents Bartlet and Chigorin will have
their meeting at 3:00 at Mantyniemi.

That's a change. Photo op, stills only,
at the beginning of the meeting.

- C.J.?
- What are the president's goals...

...of the summit?
- First, to meet the new Russian president.

But they share the aspiration of building
a secure and undivided Europe.

Are you aware of the fire that
happened at King Fatah Middle School?

Yeah. That's a tragedy. Chris.

Saudi news says rescuers
were prevented...

...from getting to several
female students by the religious police.

- Yeah, I read that too. Steve?
- Can the White House comment?

I literally got this
a minute and a half ago.

I haven't spoken to the president
or chief of staff, State...

...or anyone in Communications.
This is just me.

- Well, do you have a comment?
- I don't. No.

I'm sorry, C.J.,
but you're not outraged by this?

Outraged? I'm barely surprised.

This is a country where women
aren't allowed to drive a car.

They can't be in the company
of any man other than a close relative.

Their dress code is so strict that
it'd make a nun look like Malibu Barbie.

They beheaded 121 people last year
for robbery, rape and drug trafficking.

They have no free press, no elected
government, no political parties...

...and the royal family allows the
religious police to travel in sixes...

...carrying nightsticks
and they freely and publicly beat women.

But Brutus is an honorable man.

Seventeen girls died because they
weren't wearing the proper clothing.

Am I outraged?

No, Steve. No, Chris. No, Mark.

That is Saudi Arabia, our partners
in peace. Bonnie, then Scott.

Sam, you know a guy named Farley
who worked here before I did?

- Where did he work?
- For the president.

- No. What's his first name?
- I don't know.

A kid wrote to the president saying that
when he was campaigning...

...he met his assistant, Mr. Farley.

Probably one of the guys from early on.
I didn't know them.

It couldn't have been that early.

The kid says they met
at a budget speech in Pittsburgh.

- He means San Diego.
- He says Pittsburgh.

We never did a budget speech
in Pittsburgh.

- This is a little weird.
- How many weird letters come a day?

Couple thousand, but this one has the
president's private mail code on it.

How many confused people
does he befriend every day?

But he doesn't
give them the private mail code.

I don't know.
I'm on with the Russians.

- Good morning, I'm Sam Seaborn.
- Nickolai lvanovich.

- George Kowzlowski.
- Thanks for coming by.

This should be quick.

Let me say that President Bartlet looks
forward to meeting President Chigorin...

...and having a productive meeting.

Mr. Seaborn, we understood
that the protocol arrangements...

...had been finalized
by the advance teams in Helsinki.

That's right,
but there are points I'd like to revisit.

My thinking being I could relay
my concerns to you at the embassy.

You could send them to Moscow
and hopefully get an answer quickly...

...because we're
coming down to it now.

I'm sorry, I... .

It's coming up quickly.
The summit.

- It's Saturday and this is Monday.
- Oh, yes, yes.

We've agreed
to a consecutive translation?

- Yes.
- I'd like a simultaneous translation.

They prefer that the two leaders
pause while their remarks are rendered.

Rendered into the particular language.

President Bartlet has a rhythm to his
speaking that's best uninterrupted.

- That's the reason I bring it up.
- We'll pass that over.

- I'm sorry,"pass it on"?
- Yes.

I'm sorry, it's just that one is good
and one is bad.

We agreed on the Grand Salon
in Finlandia Hall for the 6:00 meeting...

...and I wanted to change that
to the Hall of Flags.

Hall of Flags. Didn't we agree
3:00 for that meeting?

- It's funny you should mention that.
- I'm sorry?

It's funny...

It's a coincidence that you happened
to mention the time of the meeting.

See, President Chigorin
only has to fly through one time zone.

President Bartlet
has to fly through seven.

Don't get me wrong, this president
can do three shows a night.

But there's no one who has a worse
reaction to jet lag than he does.

Any trip eight hours or longer,
someone gets fired.

- It's already been me three times, so...
- We'll pass it on.

Everyone on the White House staff
would agree that's a deal breaker.

All right, then.

- Was there anything else?
- Yeah, we're just getting started.

- You guys hungry?
- No.

- You ready?
- Yeah, where are we going?

The yogurt place.
Are those angry faxes?

They're... Yeah.
They're very angry faxes.

- From Saudis?
- Yeah.

- What did you expect?
- Very angry faxes from Saudis.

And angry e-mails. Look at these.

I'm seeing some troubling spelling here.
"Godless" with two D's?

- Let's go.
- Hang on.

- C.J.?
- I saw it.

- It's a death threat.
- It's not a big deal.

- You sure?
- Yeah. Don't tell anybody, okay?

I don't want a lot of production.

- All right.
- Thanks.

Josh? Can you come in here...

...and look at this, please?
- Donna.

- Look at what?
- C.J. 's e-mail.

Call Frank Tenney downstairs,
I wanna talk to him right away.


- You take this seriously?
- Yeah, it's a death threat, C.J.

I take it seriously.

I've had some experience with this.

- Thank you all so much.
- Thank you.

Bye-bye. Bye-bye.

- They wanna show us a picture.
- Of what?

I don't know.

We've got a problem. Jake Kimball
came to see me this morning.

- What's he doing here?
- Looking 100 years old.

Anteras is gonna announce
a chip recall on Thursday.

How big?


What are you talking about?

- They discovered a problem...
- That's gotta be 50 million chips.

Eighty million.

- Leo, how the hell...?
- I know.

That's the end of Anteras.

- Yeah.
- 98,000 workers...

...I think 75,000 in the U.S.
Plus the kidney punch at NASDAQ.

I think Jake's gonna put a shotgun
in his mouth, I really do.



- Mr. President.
- Fitz! Fitz, you old polecat... old so-and-so.

- You trying to be one of the fellas, sir?
- Yeah.

- Well, well done, sir.
- Thank you.

This picture was taken by an SR-71
during a routine flyover in the Gulf.

This is Bushehr. And this is what looks to
me like the early days of construction...

...on a light water reactor. Light water is
ordinary water, tap water. It's Perrier.


Light water is what's used
for nuclear reactors and the Iranians...

...contracted the Russians to build them
a light water reactor for that purpose.

What's the problem?

Four intelligence agencies tell me
I'm wrong. And I am.

The Russians are building them
a heavy water reactor.

What do you use heavy water for?


- Morning, Janice.
- Morning, Mr. Ziegler.

- Call me Toby.
- Okay.

That's a nice uniform.

- How long have you guys had it?
- About a thousand years.

- Okay.
- Hey, Toby.

Excuse me. I've gotta tell you
something. You ready?

- What?
- I've got nothing to do.

What do you mean?

I got to the office at 6 and it turned out
everything I had to do got done by 7:30.

Some strange fluke of the calendar.
So I'm just out here walking around.

- You know, just being in the world.
- In the hallways.

- Yeah. Well, you know.
- I'm gonna change all that.

Meet with a Russian reporter
named Ludmilla Koss.

She's the Washington correspondent
for the Novaya Gazeta.

She wants a seat
on the press charter.

- Why is she asking us?
- The Russians banned her.

- Why?
- She supported the other guy.

Time to teach these Stoli-drinking
Tchaikovskies a thing or two...

...about free press, American-style.

You don't ban those who supported
your opponent... make them wallow in their
loserdom by covering your victory.

You sit them in the front row,
you give them a hat.

I will save Ludmilla Koss,
for I am Toby...

...and in so doing...
Why am I going on like this?

- I don't know.
- Set up the meeting.

- Obviously I have a little time.
- Thank you.


C.J., Frank Tenney spoke to me
this morning.

Yeah, Josh made me
see him yesterday.

He filed everything
he was supposed to file.

Can I see the message?

It's just... . You know, it's what it is.

Could you type in your password?

- You checked your e-mail yet today?
- I just got here.

Okay, he sent another one
at 5:20 this morning.

- Have you had cyber-threats before?
- Not explicitly.

Agent Tenney says you don't recognize
the sender's address.


Have you had a bad breakup
with a boyfriend lately?

God, Ron, I haven't had a boyfriend in...
I get a lot of hate mail.

After the president,
I'm the single most visible person... the federal government.
Every day I'm on TV...

...and every day exactly half the people
are gonna disagree with you.

Some will hate you.
And some will write letters.

Yeah, this isn't hate mail,
this is a death threat.

Could I use your computer
for a second?


Okay. I'm gonna need to take
your hard drive.

- Why?
- I just used trace-route tools.

The server and the IP address
don't match.

The address is disguising the origin.

In my briefing yesterday I made remarks
about a situation in Saudi Arabia.

I may have gone too far,
I was thinking of apologizing.

Yeah, this doesn't have anything
to do with that.

What do you mean?

Muslim extremists don't get personal.
They don't know your name or care.

They don't want one person,
they want hundreds.

That's why they don't use bullets.

Killing one person
is a waste of a bomb.

He wants you,
why doesn't he want me?

Someone will come
get your hard drive.

We're intercepting all your e-mails
from the address. Thank you.

The press conference
can be moved to 9:00.

- Thank you.
- And... Excuse me.

Thank you. And the venue
can be moved to Hall of Mirrors.

- Flags.
- Yes.

- But we need something from you.
- Okay.

On his arrival and during
outdoor photograph opportunity...

...President Bartlet must wear overcoat.
- A coat?

He must wear coat.
He must wear gloves.

Scarves and earmuffs permissible,
but optional.

Hang on. Yes, because President
Chigorin wants to wear a coat...

...and doesn't wanna look like a wimp.
- It is freezing to cold in Reykjavik.

It is freezing to cold in Helsinki.

It is freezing to cold in Staad.
Why must every American president...

...bound out of an automobile
like as at a yacht club, while in...

- Excuse me. Compare...?
- Comparison.

Compare. While in comparison
our leader looks like...

- I don't even know what word is.
- Frumpy?

I don't know what"frumpy" is,
but onomatopoetically, sounds right.

It's hard not to like a guy who doesn't
know frumpy but knows onomatopoeia.

I'll talk to the president
about the coat.

Final meeting is tomorrow
on the last points and that's it.

- Thank you, sir.
- Thank you.

- What is onomatop...?
- Sounds like. Sounds like.

- Well, you were right.
- About what?

He never made a speech in Pittsburgh.
Kid's 9, so he would've been 5 or 6.

Maybe he thought
everything was a budget speech.

- Or maybe it's a crazy letter.
- It's not.

- You sure?
- I read a lot of letters.

I got one last year asking me to donate
my brain to a medical school in Granada.

There are days when I think,
"Yeah, why not just get it over with?"

He took a picture with the president.
The advance guys...

...get the name and address, we send a
copy. But there's no record of this one.

- Plus, his father's in trouble.
- Why?

He works at the Franklin Mill's furnaces.
The kid said they may fire him...

...because he's joining a union,
a group called...

...the Steel Workers Organizing
Committee. Ever heard of them?

Yeah, except they have
a different name today.

- What?
- The AFL-CIO.

And furnace workers are all unionized.


- Hey, Charlie.
- Hey.

- Ms. Koss?
- Yes.

Toby Ziegler, come on in.

- You write for the Novaya Gazeta.
- Yes.

- Your circulation's gotten huge.
- Highest daily in Russia.

It's hard to tell if it's because
of your reporting, your editorials...

...or the naked women on page three.

We did not invent this thing. Nor did we
invent the comic strips or Lotto.

Touch?, madam.

So, what did you do to piss off
President Chigorin?

President Chigorin
does not like criticism.

- Have you met someone who does?
- That is not the point.

No, I'm just talking.

Listen, you're already credentialed
to cover our president.

It's just putting you on the plane.
Before I do that...

...I wanna check the
State Department to make sure...'s not a grotesquely insulting thing
to do to a new president...

...from whom the U.S.
is hoping for quite a bit.

So your First Amendment
only extends as far as is polite?

No, it extends farther than that,
but it only protects us.

Believe me, if we were able to enforce
U.S. law around the world...

...I'd retire and go scuba diving.
- You like diving?

I've never done it or anything else.
But I've seen pictures.

It looks fun. I've seen pictures
of people out there in the world...

...and they all look like
they're glad they are.

Granted, someone's usually trying
to sell something in these pictures...

...but I'll tell you what,
I'm 44 years old and I'm buying.

I usually don't talk this much,
but I'm having an odd day.

Wanna stay and look at pictures
of scuba divers?

- No, thank you.
- Okay, then. We'll talk tomorrow.

Thank you very much.

Thanks so much. Thank you.

Listen, before we go in there, let's
take a second to talk about Anteras.

- Yeah.
- It's not like we can't help.

- We can't help.
- I'm not saying Commerce or Treasury...

...calls the banks, but an emergency loan
guarantee, if we can get Congress to...

- Good morning, sir.
- Good morning.

Yeah, we can't do it.

How did it go?

They confronted the
Russian atomic energy minister.

- And?
- He denies everything.

- Good enough for me.
- He doesn't deny building a reactor.

They've had contracts with Iran
since '76 and he says that...

...deuterium-based reactors have been
up and running in Canada for years.

Yeah, well, Canada, Russia, roughly
the same relationship with the U.S.

Fitz, you old horse thief,
you old muckety-muck.

Well, good morning again, sir.

Josh says the director of Minatom
says it's commercial power production.

Yeah, except that there are no
power lines to and from the site.

And there's no reprocessing facility.

This one's 50 megawatts thermal,
which is identical to the reactor...

...Pakistan's got in Kushab.

This isn't used to make the lights go,
it's used to make plutonium.

Mr. President, I am not your
national security advisor...

...or your secretary of Defense
or State...

...but the Russians are giving Iran
the bomb.


...that's what was said by my national
security advisor 20 minutes ago...

...right after it was said by
the secretaries of State and Defense.

And for what it's worth,
the directors of the CIA, NSA, FBI...

...and Naval Intelligence agree.

Leo, isn't Minatom in terrible shape?

They lost some customers
after Chernobyl.

Yeah, that's welcome to free markets
the hard way.

But my point is, their light water reactor
contracts are behind schedule.

- All kinds of technical failures.
- Did the Iranians force them to build...

...a heavy water reactor?
- To satisfy their contracts, maybe.

Crap. And even if that were the case,
it doesn't make them Jean Valjean.

They want a power broker
in the Middle East.

Just what the doctor ordered
for the Middle East.

All right, while avoiding
the biggest diplomacy disaster...

...since I don't know when...

...Josh, Leo, you guys have to figure out
a way to get me out of it.

Get him out of what?

He's not going to Helsinki.

There's something really good
on television.

- What?
- That's why he can't go.

Something good is on TV
and he can't work a VCR.

No, not that. They know he's got
a staff. They wouldn't buy it.

- It's that he doesn't trust technology.
- Josh.

- This is insane.
- News of the reactor's gonna break.

You know it will, and it's gonna break
at the worst possible time.

In fact, my money's on it breaking right
next to the picture of him with Chigorin.

While wearing a coat
to protect his MS-riddled body...

...from the fierce climate in Finland.
- How can all of you guys... so sure it's not Minatom
and the other Cold War holdouts...

...the ex-Soviets?
- I don't care who it is.

There are other issues.
NATO expansion, the Caspian pipeline...

You don't get to put a bomb in Iran!
There are no other issues right now.

We're gonna have to fly over there
and blow this thing up...

...and given what they're manufacturing
there, I don't know if that's possible.

We were all so smart.

Russia's hobbled, the next conflict's
gonna be in the Middle East.

Turns out it is in the Middle East.

With the Russians.

You didn't answer my question.

- What question?
- Chigorin just took office...

...four months ago.

How can you be sure
it's not a rogue thing?

I don't want a leak, Josh.

- Everyone's proceeding like we're going?
- Yes. How can you be sure?

I can't.


Thanks for coming down.

Is there still a summit to go to?

- I'm sorry, what did you say?
- Sorry, I asked because...


I wanted to talk to you
because I've been asked... put a reporter from the
Novaya Gazeta on the press plane.

That's a mistake.

You understand I'm talking about...

...a pencil and a pad of paper,
from which no one has ever died.

There isn't any publication in Russia
more critical of the Chigorin government.

The editorial judgment aside,
what's the damage assessment?

The point of the summit
is to build strong bilateral ties...

...with a new administration. So...

- We make it clear it's not personal.
- How do we do that?

I don't know.
What are the things they could do?

We've got a half-dozen U.S. reporters in
Moscow whose credentials are pending.

This is like if they credentialed
the Enquirer to cover the summit.

If the Enquirer ever asked us,
we'd credential them.

Making sure the Enquirer can write freely
is the only way I can be sure...

...that The New York Times
is writing whatever it wants.

Well, you asked me what I thought,
I'm 100 percent against it.

- Okay.
- Thanks.

Good morning, Mr. President.

You'll get Secret Service protection.
But I can't order it...

...unless you sign this piece of paper,
so sign this piece of paper.

- Sir, can I ask why you feel...?
- Because Ron says it is.

And around here,
we do whatever Ron says.

- Well, I think it might be an overreaction.
- Good for you.

With all your years of training
and experience in sniffing out crime...

...your opinion carries
a lot of weight with me.

- I'll appear fragile.
- You kidding?

- Sir...
- We're talking about one bodyguard.

I have 12.
And that's before I leave the house.

You ever count how many guns
come with me...

...when Abbey and I take in a play
at the Kennedy Center?

- Do I seem fragile to you?
- No, sir.

- Then...
- You're also not a woman in a man's job.

You're required by law to be protected
by the Treasury Department.

You don't have a choice. Frankly, sir,
you and I both know you've...

...scored points with the public and the
press by shrugging off Secret Service...

...and going to a bookstore.
- I don't care.

- Sir...
- You're part of my family.

This thing is happening and I simply
won't permit it. Sign the piece of paper.

- Look...
- Let me tell you. The last time...

...a member of my staff got a death
threat, they missed him and hit me!

Ron, is there any evidence?

Any evidence at all that this guy...?
Look, I work in the White House...

...everybody knows that, but is there
any evidence to suggest that... .

Where did you get these?

Today's e-mail.

That's me leaving my house
on Monday.

This one's at a restaurant
where I had...

...dinner with my niece.

This one's from this morning.

It was taken
from about 20 feet away.


- Let's go outside and talk.
- Okay.

Thank you, Mr. President.

- Toby.
- Yeah.

- Good morning, sir.
- What's going on?

I wanted to give you a heads up.
The Journal's running an editorial...

...with regard to broken promises
and fiscal spending.

Oh, man, the greatest campaign speech
ever about money.

FDR promises to tighten our belts.
What's he do when he gets here?

Spends more than we knew
could be spent.

It's because he discovered
it's better for long-term growth.

The Journal probably wrote an editorial
about his broken promises too.

I can reference that speech,
where did he give that?

- It was in the industrial Northeast.
- Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania.

Charlie, FDR gave a budget speech
in 1932 in Pittsburgh.

Can you get your hands
on a copy?

- I'm sorry, sir?
- I said, FDR gave a budget speech...


- Yes, sir.
- Okay.

Thank you, Mr. President.

- Good morning.
- How's it going?

Is there a TV show
you really, really like?

- No.
- Then don't worry about it...

...let's talk about something else.
- What?

Helping out Anteras.

What do you want from my life?

The government can't be in the business
of cosigning loans.

It wouldn't be handing them a bag
of unmarked bills...

...just backing the loans
to cover the recall.

- It's a subsidy.
- It's a small one.

- I'm an economist!
- Sir, this was not a failure of business.

It was, I don't know,
it was a mistake... was human error.
And Jake's been completely forthright...

- The marketplace will take care of it.
- The marketplace will kill Anteras.

- That's what's supposed to happen.
- This isn't unprecedented.

- We helped out steel.
- That industry was hurt by unfair trade.

Anteras was hurt
by their own carelessness.

A loan guarantee
doesn't cost the taxpayers a nickel.

Unless they go under. Either way,
we've said,"We're open for business."

For a corporate icon that feeds into
tech companies, computers, aerospace.

The ripple effects.
Workers losing jobs.

It's a blue-chip stock
that's in every major...

They were huge contributors!

How the hell am I supposed...?
They were huge contributors!

Carelessness doesn't have to exist
for a mistake to be made.

- What?
- You said it was carelessness...

...and I don't believe carelessness
has to exist for a mistake to be made.

Jake was a contributor and he's
never asked for a favor, not even now.

He was a contributor because
he knows us and we know him...

...and we know if a mistake happened
in design or production at Anteras... wasn't shoddy,
it wasn't on the cheap.

You know how many chips
have acted up so far? One.

Dollars to doughnuts he could've
gotten away with it. But...

...he wanted to warn people
they may have a problem before... .

I don't even know what happens when
80 million computers stop working right.

But tell me this isn't exactly how we
want American business to behave.

I know it doesn't look good,
he's a friend of ours.

But there is a reason
he's a friend of ours.

They're announcing
end of business tomorrow?

Yes, sir.

I'm not saying anything, but grab people
and put together some numbers.

- Yes, sir.
- I'm not saying anything.

Thank you, Mr. President.

The Baltic herring industry was subject
of recent trade agreement...

...between Russians and Finns.

However, we'll take off menu.

- Why?
- We were asked to.

Mrs. Bartlet likes shrimp.

That is the most ridiculous thing
I've ever heard.

- Put whatever you want on the menu.
- Very well.

And I'd like to request
that the press pool... allowed to photograph
the Arctic Peoples' exhibit.

Also very well.

And that, my good friends, is that.

It was a pleasure
doing business with you.

- We have one more.
- Name it.

On the issue of the language
in the joint statement.

Well, I can't negotiate language
in the statement.

It's just a suggestion.

The language has been worked out by
State and Commerce and Defense.

- It's way beyond...
- Just hear suggestion, Sam.


"Both President Chigorin and myself
agree that we must enter 21 st century... partners and friends,
not as adversaries.

We must lead way in stemming tide
of nuclear proliferation...

...and we must start with ourselves.

For why should two nations
still possess power... destroy each other 10 times over?
Surely once is enough."

- Whose idea was this?
- Mine.

Who wrote it?

I did.

You will pass it up?

- Yeah.
- That's good one, yes?


Thank you.

- Hello.
- Hello.

Here are your credentials
for the plane.

Here's your plane ticket. Here are your
credentials for the palace...

...the Saturday press conference,
the Arctic Peoples' exhibit...

...the Sunday press conference
and the Hall of Flags.

- Thank you very much.
- By the way, I found out why Chigorin...

...and his people
have such a problem with you.

- It's because I don't flatter them.
- No, it's because you stink.

- I beg your pardon?
- You can beg all you want...'re not gonna get it.

Last month you alleged
that the Chigorin government...

...bombed several apartments,
based on an unattributed source.

It was refuted,
you never retracted it.

The government's case
was all over TV.

Last week you wrote a cover story
about Chigorin's mother-in-law...

...moving near the Kremlin. You printed
her home address, she had to relocate.

Well, that's her decision.

You reported the failing grades of the
defense minister's 12-year-old son.

Does that count as journalism? Does
that do anything but bring ridicule...

...on a defenseless kid?

We've got people like you here.

On cable and on the Internet.

And there's no one anywhere
on the ideological spectrum...

...who doesn't roll their eyes
when their names are spoken out loud.

We've always had free press here,
we take it for granted.

How can you treat it like this?

You should give up your space
and put another naked woman in there.


There are your credentials.

The majority leader
moves up HMO reform.

- He'll do that?
- We've talked to him.

He's moved up HMO reform,
nothing we can do about it...

...the welfare
of your people comes first.

- He has a duma, he'll understand.
- Makes sense.

We save face
and send a strong message.

- Anybody?
- Sounds great.

Sounds good to me.

Can I use this to get out of
weddings and stuff?

Sam, the majority leader's
gonna move up HMO reform.

My duma's voting on it,
what do you think?

Sorry, sir. Would you hear
what Sam has to say for a moment?


Listen, I'd like to tell you about
something and if, when I'm done... think I sounded like an idiot, just
know that I'll be feeling like one as well.

Nickolai lvanovich, the senior member
of the logistical negotiating team...

...said he had language to add to the
joint statement. He wrote it himself.

- What's he getting involved in that for?
- Yeah.

And what he wanted added was:

"Together, in partnership, we must stem
the tide of nuclear proliferation.

For why should our two nations
still possess the power... destroy themselves 10 times over?
Surely once is enough."

Now, I have to tell you, sir,
that both these negotiators...

...had conversational English,
but they didn't have idioms.

- I promise you.
-"Stem the tide" is an English idiom.

Yeah, and they don't have
"Surely once is enough" either.

Sir, Chigorin wrote that.

I think he's trying to send you
a message, Mr. President.

- He is trying to send me a message.
- That's what he's doing.

We've been trying to get
nonproliferation on the agenda.

We've been trying to put those
exact words in Chigorin's mouth.

He's got a Soviet defense
establishment trying to do business.

Wait a second, hang on.

You're telling me that foreign policy
of this magnitude... conducted through Sam?
And I'm still alive?

We're pretty impressed ourselves.

Why didn't he just have somebody
pick up the phone?

It's the old diplomatic corps
and he can't trust them yet.


I think he's going out on a limb.

I think you should meet him there.

Let's go to Helsinki. But the reactor's
first thing on the agenda.


- Thank you, Mr. President.
- Thanks, everyone.

- Thanks, sir.
- Thank you, sir.

Thank you.

- Thanks.
- I've got Jake Kimball in my office, sir.

I'll be right in.


Yes, sir.

- Nice job.
- Thank you.

Tell me again why I can't wear
whatever the hell I want.

Well, that's not entirely true, sir,
the earmuffs are optional.

Okay. I probably
won't be wearing them.

Yes, sir.

Whatever happened to Pong?
It was great.

It was relaxing,
it had that very satisfying sound.

- I don't know, sir.
- Yeah, me neither. Leo?


Leo wanted to see
if we could guarantee a loan.

I can't ask you for that.

I appreciate that and I can't give it to
you. But I can do one better.

- What?
- We'll stay his biggest customer.

When you announce your recall,
say you're keeping...

...your government contracts.
Leo will work with Congress.

That's very generous.
I appreciate your confidence.

Talk to me about the 75,000 workers.

I'll have no salary for two years
and my managers...

...will cut their salaries in half before
we even consider laying anyone off.

All right.
Jakie, this is the White House.

If we only screw up twice before
breakfast, it was a very good morning.

- Yes, sir.
- One more thing.

You can't make any more campaign
contributions to me or any Democrat.

- You can vote, that's it.
- Yes, sir.

I knew I'd get screwed
by a computer one day.

I have an important photo op.
Excuse me.


- Mr. Tatum?
- I'm Dr. Tatum.

I'm the one you talked to on the phone.
This is my father.

I'm Charlie Young.
I'm personal aide to the president.

- Yes.
- You didn't tell him anything, right?

- He thinks we're on Candid Camera.
- Or that this is a ruse of some kind.

- What the hell...?
- It's not. It's not a ruse.

When you were 9, you wrote
this letter to Franklin Roosevelt.

You met him when he was governor of
New York and a candidate for president.

Well, I'll be damned.

You met his personal aide,
Tom Farley.

That's me.
Mr. Tatum, by any chance...

...the apartment where you grew up in
Pittsburgh, was it 2345 Northern...

- State Boulevard.
- Yeah.

That's the only residential building
in Pittsburgh torn down recently.

In fact, it was just two weeks ago.

Somebody found your letter
and put the right postage on it.

Well, would you look
at what people do?

None of it would've happened,
except there's a five-digit code...

...that presidents give out
to close friends.

And President Bartlet
copied his from FDR.

- For the 100th time, it was an homage.
- Yes, sir.

- Alan Tatum?
- Yes, sir.

- The White House owes you one picture.
- Oh, my.

- Let's go, Dad.
- Mr. President, this is my son, Ted.

- Good to meet you.
- He's a doctor.

- Dad.
- Oh, God, I'm sorry. I'm married to one.

Oh, no, you meant that as a good thing.
Let's go.

FDR was a fine president,
don't get me wrong.

But if you want something done right,
damn it, call New Hampshire.

Come in, please.

Are you retired, Mr. Tatum?

Yes, sir.
53 years on the Spirit of St. Louis.

- New York to St. Louis.
- Your grandfather was a furnace worker.

Your father was on the railroads.
You couldn't find honest work?

I'd like my picture taken with that
young man, if you don't mind.


- Thank you.
- Thank you.

You're welcome.

Well, thank you very much, sir.

This was a once-in-a-lifetime
experience for both of us.

Where are you going?

- You got pictures, what do I get?
- I don't know what...

You were there at his speech.
You gotta tell me everything.

Sit, we're gonna get some food.
You sit quietly over there...

...and try to resist the temptation
to bill me for something.

- Hello.
- C.J. Cregg?

- Yeah.
- Special Agent Simon Donovan.

I'm with the Treasury Department.

What branch of the Treasury,
Agent Donovan?

U.S. Secret Service.

I don't like flashing it,
gives some people the jumps.

But Agent Butterfield
said you're a reluctant...

How does this work?

- What is it you'd like to know?
- From how far away can you do this?

- I respect a certain perimeter of privacy.
- What does that mean?

- I don't need to see you naked.
- Okay.

Though"better safe than sorry" is a bit
of a motto for us over at Treasury.

I don't know, you're the boss.

I'll be leading four agents, each working
a third of a day, one day off a week.

We've set up a command post in your
apartment building, set up surveillance.

You can put your car in a garage,
you'll be using ours.

- You can't come in the briefing room.
- Crowded room, anyone can get in.

- You're up at the podium. I'll be there.
- This what you mean by"I'm the boss"?

Yeah, I guess that's more
of an honorary thing.

This guy isn't smalltime, Ms. Cregg.

You're being hunted.

I can't guarantee anything except to say
if you're dead, chances are I am too.

I guess it's gonna have to be
the little things now.


I'm gonna go check in
with my command.