The Way of the Househusband (2021–…): Season 1, Episode 2 - Episode #1.2 - full transcript
Masa realizes that housewives and househusbands have a lot in common with the yakuza. Tatsu takes a yoga class and thoroughly enjoys himself.
A NETFLIX ORIGINAL ANIME SERIES
ORIGINAL WORK BY KOUSUKE OONO
PRODUCED BY NETFLIX
EPISODE 7
Hello?
What? The boss is coming? What time?
Before the boss arrives,
I've got a job for ya.
Everyone seems to think
you're the man, but…
SWOOSH
…you've still gotta prove it to me.
BEEP
Are you up to it? Huh?
SWIPE
Not bad.
This is your turf now.
Hey, attack the goddamned corners!
That's where all the scum hangs out,
so hit it, you piece of chickenshit!
You've gotta attack these spots
with a stick wrapped in a cloth.
That'll get the cracks and wires.
After all, you're just
an amateur Miku brought home
from an obligatory ceremony.
Being a househusband ain't no joke.
I'm a pro.
May it be blood,
footprints, or fingerprints,
any trace will be
wiped out.
Enough! Get outta here!
WHIRR
SUCK
It's near here, Madam Chairperson.
I've always wanted to meet him.
Here it is.
CRASH, BANG, SMASH
It's from Tatsu's apartment!
Tatsu, what happened?
I'm sorry, Boss.
I screwed up.
What on earth happened?
Are you all right?
Well…
Some cocky young punk
just joined my group.
BEEP
EPISODE 8
Yes,
this PTA job has just come up.
So could you look after
my Ryota for a little bit?
Sure, no problem.
Really? That's great!
Behave yourself, okay?
He's the scary guy
I see sometimes around here.
Now then, Ryota…
what shall we play?
-Thank you for looking after me.
-Huh?
Hey, wait a minute.
FLINCH
Want something sweet?
I just made these cookies.
Did you make these yourself?
CRUNCH
This is really good!
Good thing I made 'em.
Okay, how about a game then?
Oh, you have games?
Oh, you like 'em?
Yes! I'm awesome at Morio Kart…
Odd or even?
Koi-koi!
Pong!
Snake eyes!
This isn't what I wanted to play!
Maybe he would've been better off
playing with some older girl.
Wow, this is
the Cobalt Police from Policure!
CRACK
What happened?
Are you all right, Ryota?
I'm sorry. I…
This is…
Miku's precious Policure thingamajig!
Hey…
Hey!
Come back! Blue Policure thing!
What do we do?
Don't worry. I'm gonna take care of this.
Huh?
Everybody makes mistakes.
What's important
is how you set things straight afterwards.
CLATTER
THUNK
See, my old boss always said…
PLACE
"If it's dead, just bury it."
See?
Yes?
Hm? What're you up to?
SPIN, DROP
Huh?
EPISODE 9
BUMP
Hey, watch where ya goin'!
FIGHTING WITH A LARGE NUMBER OF PEOPLE
Hold it. I'm guugling right now.
Hey! Wait, hang on…
It's coming… Shit, the signal's weak.
Hey, just wait, will ya?
"Beginners tend to use too much force."
"The important thing is
to draw up a proper plan."
"Housewives, let's start DIY. It's easy!"
"DIY"?
Oh, Boss Tatsu!
Oh, Masa.
You morons, now you've had it.
Boss Tatsu, go on, kick their asses.
Ow!
Huh?
You got into this fight yourself, right?
So finish it yourself, okay?
Boss…
"Do it…" I don't know English.
That guy's Tatsu, the Immortal Dragon.
The Tendo Group told us
to steer clear of him.
I know. Let's split.
You runnin' away? Useless punks!
Did you say something?
Boss!
RATTLE
Two-by-fours sure are amazing.
That's one solid piece of wood.
Perfect for making chairs.
PIERCE
You takin' the piss?
When you use
a tool or a blade to cut wood,
make sure there's no one else around.
Boss!
You got away, you lucky bastards!
Jeez…
This is a househusband?
Who's the real yakuza…
Could yakuza and househusband
be two sides of the same coin?
It's all connected,
the way of the househusband
and the way of the yakuza!
-I'm gonna follow you!
-Huh?
Boss, please teach me!
What? DIY?
SNEER
We've done it.
That's cute.
The Way of the Househusband.
EPISODE 10
Gettin' a bit saggy?
Why are you hula hooping?
Watch out!
Ouch!
Enough!
Do it outside, will you?
Also, how about this?
FITNESS
FREE TRIAL PROMOTION
GOKU FITNESS
TRAINING GYM
So this is where you work out?
We come once a week.
Yes.
They're running a promo now,
so you can try out
different classes for free!
Classes?
Okay, now everybody…
Let's move to the music.
One, two…
Everybody, smile.
Is that a smile?
Come on, step it up!
To the beat.
Don't forget to smile now.
Okay, now strike a pose.
That's one scary smile!
Wow, aerobics is pretty fun.
-You were really good, Tatsu!
-Wasn't he?
Oh, and another thing, Tatsu,
when it comes to fitness…
Okay, everyone, move from this position
while breathing out slowly,
lowering your legs towards your head.
Doesn't it remind you of another position?
Yeah, looks just like me after the boss
walloped me with his wooden sword.
Right, that's the Plow Pose.
This pose is when you're ready
to get your pinky cut off
after screwing up real bad.
This is your pose in the driver's seat
when you give some kid the keys
to dump the car in the mountains.
This one's after taking
a bullet right in the head.
Oh, you don't have to say it anymore.
Well done, everyone!
I reckon I like this yoga thing.
Oh, really?
I haven't sweated
this much for a long time,
not since I smashed a dump truck
into the other gang's office.
What? Did he say smashing dance?
Anyway, it's good
that he enjoyed himself, isn't it?
Yeah, it was way more fun than I thought…
Oh, Tatsu!
That's the ladies' room!
Oh, Tatsu…
LEAN
BAM
What? Are you okay, Tatsu?
Boss Lady…
"Boss Lady"?
I'm prepared!
Tie me up and bury me in the mountain
or dump me in the sea. Whatever you like!
Now!
That looks like a yoga pose.
EPISODE 11
GET 10% POINTS BACK!
Excuse me.
Where can I find that white powder stuff?
We don't sell that.
Oh, sorry.
I think he actually means flour.
God, this supermarket is enormous.
We've still got some soda left at home.
What's wrong with stocking up?
No way. You drink too much of it.
Oh, come on.
SWIPE, PLACE
No way.
Nope.
No.
Jeez, can't I get anything I want?
Fuzz face!
Mr. Goon Shades!
If you act like a spoiled brat,
I won't buy you any more games!
Hey, look over there.
My god, it's a yakuza!
Harassing a normal citizen? So scary.
Ack.
Come on, let's go, Tacchan.
What?
People are scared of me?
That's nonsense.
No, it isn't.
MIDORI SPORTS
I get along fine with our neighbors.
They all think I'm funny.
Oh, do they?
You wanna pick a fight with me?
Sir, can I help you…
See?
Maybe it's the way you dress.
The way I dress?
Well, it's kinda intimidating.
Seeing as we're in the mall,
why don't you find some new clothes?
New clothes, huh?
I see…
Okay, well…
Dammit, they're all the same!
-Were you listening to me?
-Yes.
You're a househusband, so you should be
more charming or something.
Don't you understand?
I'm intimidating?
I was called the Immortal Dragon
and survived in the underworld
all those years.
And now I gotta be charming? Hah!
Hey, that's…
Well, having said that…
compared to when we first met…
He's improved a lot.
It's a Policure apron!
You like it?
It's cute!
Say, "Coming to catch you!"
Huh? "Coming to…" What was it?
Okay, so for the pose…
-"Coming to catch you!"
-Hey, Mom.
Those two are nuts!
EPISODE 12
GIN'S WALK PART 2
DROP
SCRATCH
TREMBLE
Hey!
What're you doing?
Huh?
I was trying to poop.
This ain't your home.
Hey!
I said cut it out!
What's with you, for god's sake?
This is not your house! Don't you get it?
I'm sorry. No need to get so worked up!
I ain't done anything yet.
Hey, you! Stop it!
Didn't I tell ya? Stop it!
Shit!
Aw, this is a disaster!
Whatcha gonna do about it?
Well…
First, I'll do my poo.
Huh?
-Ouch!
-Hey, you…
Oh, it came out a bit.
GRAB, DASH, FWUMP
Ouch!
All right, just go here, okay?
If there's shit in the garden,
I get it in the neck!
Sorry, pal.
Huh?
Oh, it went back up again.
I'm gonna really slug you one.
ORIGINAL WORK BY KOUSUKE OONO
PRODUCED BY NETFLIX
EPISODE 7
Hello?
What? The boss is coming? What time?
Before the boss arrives,
I've got a job for ya.
Everyone seems to think
you're the man, but…
SWOOSH
…you've still gotta prove it to me.
BEEP
Are you up to it? Huh?
SWIPE
Not bad.
This is your turf now.
Hey, attack the goddamned corners!
That's where all the scum hangs out,
so hit it, you piece of chickenshit!
You've gotta attack these spots
with a stick wrapped in a cloth.
That'll get the cracks and wires.
After all, you're just
an amateur Miku brought home
from an obligatory ceremony.
Being a househusband ain't no joke.
I'm a pro.
May it be blood,
footprints, or fingerprints,
any trace will be
wiped out.
Enough! Get outta here!
WHIRR
SUCK
It's near here, Madam Chairperson.
I've always wanted to meet him.
Here it is.
CRASH, BANG, SMASH
It's from Tatsu's apartment!
Tatsu, what happened?
I'm sorry, Boss.
I screwed up.
What on earth happened?
Are you all right?
Well…
Some cocky young punk
just joined my group.
BEEP
EPISODE 8
Yes,
this PTA job has just come up.
So could you look after
my Ryota for a little bit?
Sure, no problem.
Really? That's great!
Behave yourself, okay?
He's the scary guy
I see sometimes around here.
Now then, Ryota…
what shall we play?
-Thank you for looking after me.
-Huh?
Hey, wait a minute.
FLINCH
Want something sweet?
I just made these cookies.
Did you make these yourself?
CRUNCH
This is really good!
Good thing I made 'em.
Okay, how about a game then?
Oh, you have games?
Oh, you like 'em?
Yes! I'm awesome at Morio Kart…
Odd or even?
Koi-koi!
Pong!
Snake eyes!
This isn't what I wanted to play!
Maybe he would've been better off
playing with some older girl.
Wow, this is
the Cobalt Police from Policure!
CRACK
What happened?
Are you all right, Ryota?
I'm sorry. I…
This is…
Miku's precious Policure thingamajig!
Hey…
Hey!
Come back! Blue Policure thing!
What do we do?
Don't worry. I'm gonna take care of this.
Huh?
Everybody makes mistakes.
What's important
is how you set things straight afterwards.
CLATTER
THUNK
See, my old boss always said…
PLACE
"If it's dead, just bury it."
See?
Yes?
Hm? What're you up to?
SPIN, DROP
Huh?
EPISODE 9
BUMP
Hey, watch where ya goin'!
FIGHTING WITH A LARGE NUMBER OF PEOPLE
Hold it. I'm guugling right now.
Hey! Wait, hang on…
It's coming… Shit, the signal's weak.
Hey, just wait, will ya?
"Beginners tend to use too much force."
"The important thing is
to draw up a proper plan."
"Housewives, let's start DIY. It's easy!"
"DIY"?
Oh, Boss Tatsu!
Oh, Masa.
You morons, now you've had it.
Boss Tatsu, go on, kick their asses.
Ow!
Huh?
You got into this fight yourself, right?
So finish it yourself, okay?
Boss…
"Do it…" I don't know English.
That guy's Tatsu, the Immortal Dragon.
The Tendo Group told us
to steer clear of him.
I know. Let's split.
You runnin' away? Useless punks!
Did you say something?
Boss!
RATTLE
Two-by-fours sure are amazing.
That's one solid piece of wood.
Perfect for making chairs.
PIERCE
You takin' the piss?
When you use
a tool or a blade to cut wood,
make sure there's no one else around.
Boss!
You got away, you lucky bastards!
Jeez…
This is a househusband?
Who's the real yakuza…
Could yakuza and househusband
be two sides of the same coin?
It's all connected,
the way of the househusband
and the way of the yakuza!
-I'm gonna follow you!
-Huh?
Boss, please teach me!
What? DIY?
SNEER
We've done it.
That's cute.
The Way of the Househusband.
EPISODE 10
Gettin' a bit saggy?
Why are you hula hooping?
Watch out!
Ouch!
Enough!
Do it outside, will you?
Also, how about this?
FITNESS
FREE TRIAL PROMOTION
GOKU FITNESS
TRAINING GYM
So this is where you work out?
We come once a week.
Yes.
They're running a promo now,
so you can try out
different classes for free!
Classes?
Okay, now everybody…
Let's move to the music.
One, two…
Everybody, smile.
Is that a smile?
Come on, step it up!
To the beat.
Don't forget to smile now.
Okay, now strike a pose.
That's one scary smile!
Wow, aerobics is pretty fun.
-You were really good, Tatsu!
-Wasn't he?
Oh, and another thing, Tatsu,
when it comes to fitness…
Okay, everyone, move from this position
while breathing out slowly,
lowering your legs towards your head.
Doesn't it remind you of another position?
Yeah, looks just like me after the boss
walloped me with his wooden sword.
Right, that's the Plow Pose.
This pose is when you're ready
to get your pinky cut off
after screwing up real bad.
This is your pose in the driver's seat
when you give some kid the keys
to dump the car in the mountains.
This one's after taking
a bullet right in the head.
Oh, you don't have to say it anymore.
Well done, everyone!
I reckon I like this yoga thing.
Oh, really?
I haven't sweated
this much for a long time,
not since I smashed a dump truck
into the other gang's office.
What? Did he say smashing dance?
Anyway, it's good
that he enjoyed himself, isn't it?
Yeah, it was way more fun than I thought…
Oh, Tatsu!
That's the ladies' room!
Oh, Tatsu…
LEAN
BAM
What? Are you okay, Tatsu?
Boss Lady…
"Boss Lady"?
I'm prepared!
Tie me up and bury me in the mountain
or dump me in the sea. Whatever you like!
Now!
That looks like a yoga pose.
EPISODE 11
GET 10% POINTS BACK!
Excuse me.
Where can I find that white powder stuff?
We don't sell that.
Oh, sorry.
I think he actually means flour.
God, this supermarket is enormous.
We've still got some soda left at home.
What's wrong with stocking up?
No way. You drink too much of it.
Oh, come on.
SWIPE, PLACE
No way.
Nope.
No.
Jeez, can't I get anything I want?
Fuzz face!
Mr. Goon Shades!
If you act like a spoiled brat,
I won't buy you any more games!
Hey, look over there.
My god, it's a yakuza!
Harassing a normal citizen? So scary.
Ack.
Come on, let's go, Tacchan.
What?
People are scared of me?
That's nonsense.
No, it isn't.
MIDORI SPORTS
I get along fine with our neighbors.
They all think I'm funny.
Oh, do they?
You wanna pick a fight with me?
Sir, can I help you…
See?
Maybe it's the way you dress.
The way I dress?
Well, it's kinda intimidating.
Seeing as we're in the mall,
why don't you find some new clothes?
New clothes, huh?
I see…
Okay, well…
Dammit, they're all the same!
-Were you listening to me?
-Yes.
You're a househusband, so you should be
more charming or something.
Don't you understand?
I'm intimidating?
I was called the Immortal Dragon
and survived in the underworld
all those years.
And now I gotta be charming? Hah!
Hey, that's…
Well, having said that…
compared to when we first met…
He's improved a lot.
It's a Policure apron!
You like it?
It's cute!
Say, "Coming to catch you!"
Huh? "Coming to…" What was it?
Okay, so for the pose…
-"Coming to catch you!"
-Hey, Mom.
Those two are nuts!
EPISODE 12
GIN'S WALK PART 2
DROP
SCRATCH
TREMBLE
Hey!
What're you doing?
Huh?
I was trying to poop.
This ain't your home.
Hey!
I said cut it out!
What's with you, for god's sake?
This is not your house! Don't you get it?
I'm sorry. No need to get so worked up!
I ain't done anything yet.
Hey, you! Stop it!
Didn't I tell ya? Stop it!
Shit!
Aw, this is a disaster!
Whatcha gonna do about it?
Well…
First, I'll do my poo.
Huh?
-Ouch!
-Hey, you…
Oh, it came out a bit.
GRAB, DASH, FWUMP
Ouch!
All right, just go here, okay?
If there's shit in the garden,
I get it in the neck!
Sorry, pal.
Huh?
Oh, it went back up again.
I'm gonna really slug you one.