The Way of the Househusband (2021–…): Season 1, Episode 1 - Episode #1.1 - full transcript
Miku rushes off to work but forgets her bento. Tatsu tracks down a Policure Blu-ray for Miku's birthday. Gin takes a walk around the neighborhood.
A NETFLIX ORIGINAL ANIME SERIES
ORIGINAL WORK BY KOUSUKE OONO
PRODUCED BY NETFLIX
EPISODE 1
BEEP
SQUEAK
RUSH
WHOOSH
BUBBLE, SLICE
PLOP
BAM, PAT
Okay, not bad.
BEEP, SNAP
THUD
Shit, I'm late!
SURPRISE
Huh? But it ain't time yet.
GULP
I forgot about my meeting!
Sorry, Tacchan. Gotta go!
Hey, your breakfast?
See you later!
Ah?
She sped out like a tornado.
Ah, well. Gotta start with the washing.
Then go shopping?
What? Ah, you need food.
Shit!
SHUT, RUSTLE
CLOSE, CLUNK
SET, SLAM
GRAB, BAM
You forgot your lunchbox!
RUSH
I'm going to ask you again.
What's your occupation?
Househusband.
Wait, are you the Immortal Dragon?
They say there's a legendary yakuza
who smashed ten of
his rival group's offices in one night,
alone and unarmed.
He's called The Immortal Dragon!
I heard he suddenly vanished after that.
Hey! Freeze?
SUPER SALE COUPON
CRUMPLE
Here. Please take this. See ya then.
Hey, hold on there.
The Way of the Househusband.
This'll be a cinch.
These things are selling like crazy!
This place is loaded with suckers.
These knives are a load of crap, really.
DING DONG
Hello?
CLANK, WHOOSH
Sorry for bothering you.
My name's Urita, and I?
Oh, I? are you busy at the moment?
What? Ah, this?
No, I'm not.
I've been carving something up.
WHUMP
I'm a pro too.
I'm not going to
shit my pants that easily.
Well, actually, I'd like to introduce
our company's products to you.
Ah? Blades, eh?
Bl? Yes.
You're gonna show me the gear? Huh?
These knives are all
hand-finished by skilled craftsmen
and can easily slice through?
anything.
This guy's got style!
By the way,
I heard there's a scam going around
where folks are being ripped off
on cheap goods.
Can I try this out?
Well?
That's?
SLICE
BEEP
NICE AND WARM
This is?
A hamburger steak.
LEAN
BITE
This hamburger steak
is nothing fancy, but the fish paste
makes it melt in your mouth.
It goes perfectly with the lightly salted
ketchup rice and simple side dishes.
This reminds me of my hometown.
SET
What am I doing, eating here?
The knives can go to hell.
And this guy kind of scares me.
Time to clear out.
-Get lost!
-Ow!
Dammit.
So this is the Kunimi Group's turf too?
Shit.
Since Boss disappeared,
I've been in this sorry state.
Where the heck did you go, Boss Tatsu?
SUPERMARKET JINGI
-What?
-Hm?
A head of cabbage for 100 yen, you say?
Boss!
I'll take the lot of 'em!
You're ripping folks off, aren't ya?
Pardon?
Boss!
Huh?
Is that you, Masa?
Oh, here's my loyalty card.
Where the hell have you been?
I've been looking all over for you, Boss!
BEEP, PLUNK, CRUNCH
It really screwed us up
when you split like that.
Some of us got arrested,
and the Shinzaki Group disbanded.
The rest went their own way.
Why the hell did you quit the yakuza?
LIGHT
Shall we go somewhere else?
GULP
Okay, everyone.
Today, we're making cheese croquettes.
First, we have to peel the potatoes.
Wow!
CLAP
BAM
"Wow," my ass!
What the fuck is this?
We're all waiting for the Immortal Dragon!
Why are you frying croquettes
and going "wow"?
Are you an old lady?
Masa?
MURMUR
I'm done with all that.
I'm a househusband now.
TURF = FAMILY
You can't protect what's sacred to you
through violence.
"You can't protect what's sacred to you
through violence," my ass!
You've gone soft in the head?
SLAP
This is violence!
EPISODE 4
The target has been identified.
I've checked the time and route.
I've just gotta do it.
You've seen the Immortal Dragon?
No, I know someone who has.
Lots of guys wanna kill him.
If that bastard's still alive,
who knows what?
Whoa!
Huh?
You're the Kunimi Group's?
The Immortal Dragon!
Shit, we ain't got time
to mess around here.
Hey, stop right there!
Did you fucking attack me?
Kill the bastard!
Crap, that place is gonna be packed!
Go round that way!
We've cornered him!
Go take that side!
-Hold onto this!
-Huh?
And you, take this!
You fucking idiots!
Standing there like a pair of mannequins!
A sweatshirt, one pair of socks,
and gloves?
I didn't get anything I was after!
You're not just a couple of kids
running an errand, got it?
He's really pissed off.
Sales are a battlefield.
Being a househusband is no joke.
Househusband?
Liar! You, a househusband?
Who put you up to this?
Boss, using a gun is?
GRAB, FWOOSH
WHAM
Gloves?
It's getting cold outside.
We have no money.
So this is all I could buy.
Sorry.
Wow!
Don't catch a cold.
DROP
Mommy?
Huh? Boss?
EPISODE 5
My wife's a designer.
A highly competent career woman.
And as you see, I'm a househusband.
"My Sister Is Crazy"?
What the hell is this?
A yakuza?
BA-DUMP
Keep your mouth shut.
And no eye contact.
Do you have a Blu-ray box set of
Crimecatch Policure?
Poli?
Yes, of course,
and there is plenty in stock.
By the way, which season
of the Blu-ray box set would you like?
Because there are three versions
of the Blu-ray box sets.
This is my own personal opinion,
but I would recommend
the second season of Policure.
That's because both the second season's
animation director and scriptwriter
also worked on the highly acclaimed movie.
Also, here's some geeky info.
The director continuously used
a manga style targeted at boy audiences,
so it was worth watching and innovative--
RUSTLE
Here's the money. Get me the goods pronto.
I have my own bag.
And can I have a loyalty card?
STEP
And today is?
Phew, I'm exhausted. Huh?
Whoa!
You startled?
Hey, wait, what?
BEEP, WHOOSH
What'ya doing?
Please come in.
What's going on?
KASUGA DAIMYOJIN,
AMATERASU OMIKAMI, HACHIMAN DAIBOSATSU
What the hell's all this?
CONGRATULATIONS
HAPPY BIRTHDAY, MIKU
His face?
What is all this?
And this is my offering to you!
Oh, what? A present?
Can I open it?
Wow, it's Policure!
No way. You got me this?
Yeah.
Thank you, that's so sweet!
Oh, and, well?
I love this, and it's great, but?
I already own this one.
Already own this one?
-I'll pay the penalty!
-No!
SHATTER
CONGRATULATIONS
EPISODE 6
GIN'S WALK PART 1
I'm going shopping now,
so guard the house, will ya, Gin?
JUMP, CLICK
RATTLE
THUD
We're being watched.
Do you eat grasshoppers?
Well, yes.
Hey, why don't you come down here?
You kidding?
Play with me.
No way.
HISS
Sorry.
Wow, this house is big.
ELIZABETH
What?
happened to you?
It's fine. Leave me alone, will you?
Oh, you're a girl.
Are you sure you're okay? What did you do?
I don't know.
For some reason, I can't move.
I was happily chasing
a butterfly, but then?
A butterfly?
Well, your leash is all tangled up, see?
I see.
Go back that way, then this way, and?
Oh, my?
Don't "oh, my" me!
"Elizabeth"?
What? Hey!
Are you laughing?
Hey, you!
All right.
Well then, I guess I'll go home now.
Going home?
You can't be serious!
ORIGINAL WORK BY KOUSUKE OONO
PRODUCED BY NETFLIX
EPISODE 1
BEEP
SQUEAK
RUSH
WHOOSH
BUBBLE, SLICE
PLOP
BAM, PAT
Okay, not bad.
BEEP, SNAP
THUD
Shit, I'm late!
SURPRISE
Huh? But it ain't time yet.
GULP
I forgot about my meeting!
Sorry, Tacchan. Gotta go!
Hey, your breakfast?
See you later!
Ah?
She sped out like a tornado.
Ah, well. Gotta start with the washing.
Then go shopping?
What? Ah, you need food.
Shit!
SHUT, RUSTLE
CLOSE, CLUNK
SET, SLAM
GRAB, BAM
You forgot your lunchbox!
RUSH
I'm going to ask you again.
What's your occupation?
Househusband.
Wait, are you the Immortal Dragon?
They say there's a legendary yakuza
who smashed ten of
his rival group's offices in one night,
alone and unarmed.
He's called The Immortal Dragon!
I heard he suddenly vanished after that.
Hey! Freeze?
SUPER SALE COUPON
CRUMPLE
Here. Please take this. See ya then.
Hey, hold on there.
The Way of the Househusband.
This'll be a cinch.
These things are selling like crazy!
This place is loaded with suckers.
These knives are a load of crap, really.
DING DONG
Hello?
CLANK, WHOOSH
Sorry for bothering you.
My name's Urita, and I?
Oh, I? are you busy at the moment?
What? Ah, this?
No, I'm not.
I've been carving something up.
WHUMP
I'm a pro too.
I'm not going to
shit my pants that easily.
Well, actually, I'd like to introduce
our company's products to you.
Ah? Blades, eh?
Bl? Yes.
You're gonna show me the gear? Huh?
These knives are all
hand-finished by skilled craftsmen
and can easily slice through?
anything.
This guy's got style!
By the way,
I heard there's a scam going around
where folks are being ripped off
on cheap goods.
Can I try this out?
Well?
That's?
SLICE
BEEP
NICE AND WARM
This is?
A hamburger steak.
LEAN
BITE
This hamburger steak
is nothing fancy, but the fish paste
makes it melt in your mouth.
It goes perfectly with the lightly salted
ketchup rice and simple side dishes.
This reminds me of my hometown.
SET
What am I doing, eating here?
The knives can go to hell.
And this guy kind of scares me.
Time to clear out.
-Get lost!
-Ow!
Dammit.
So this is the Kunimi Group's turf too?
Shit.
Since Boss disappeared,
I've been in this sorry state.
Where the heck did you go, Boss Tatsu?
SUPERMARKET JINGI
-What?
-Hm?
A head of cabbage for 100 yen, you say?
Boss!
I'll take the lot of 'em!
You're ripping folks off, aren't ya?
Pardon?
Boss!
Huh?
Is that you, Masa?
Oh, here's my loyalty card.
Where the hell have you been?
I've been looking all over for you, Boss!
BEEP, PLUNK, CRUNCH
It really screwed us up
when you split like that.
Some of us got arrested,
and the Shinzaki Group disbanded.
The rest went their own way.
Why the hell did you quit the yakuza?
LIGHT
Shall we go somewhere else?
GULP
Okay, everyone.
Today, we're making cheese croquettes.
First, we have to peel the potatoes.
Wow!
CLAP
BAM
"Wow," my ass!
What the fuck is this?
We're all waiting for the Immortal Dragon!
Why are you frying croquettes
and going "wow"?
Are you an old lady?
Masa?
MURMUR
I'm done with all that.
I'm a househusband now.
TURF = FAMILY
You can't protect what's sacred to you
through violence.
"You can't protect what's sacred to you
through violence," my ass!
You've gone soft in the head?
SLAP
This is violence!
EPISODE 4
The target has been identified.
I've checked the time and route.
I've just gotta do it.
You've seen the Immortal Dragon?
No, I know someone who has.
Lots of guys wanna kill him.
If that bastard's still alive,
who knows what?
Whoa!
Huh?
You're the Kunimi Group's?
The Immortal Dragon!
Shit, we ain't got time
to mess around here.
Hey, stop right there!
Did you fucking attack me?
Kill the bastard!
Crap, that place is gonna be packed!
Go round that way!
We've cornered him!
Go take that side!
-Hold onto this!
-Huh?
And you, take this!
You fucking idiots!
Standing there like a pair of mannequins!
A sweatshirt, one pair of socks,
and gloves?
I didn't get anything I was after!
You're not just a couple of kids
running an errand, got it?
He's really pissed off.
Sales are a battlefield.
Being a househusband is no joke.
Househusband?
Liar! You, a househusband?
Who put you up to this?
Boss, using a gun is?
GRAB, FWOOSH
WHAM
Gloves?
It's getting cold outside.
We have no money.
So this is all I could buy.
Sorry.
Wow!
Don't catch a cold.
DROP
Mommy?
Huh? Boss?
EPISODE 5
My wife's a designer.
A highly competent career woman.
And as you see, I'm a househusband.
"My Sister Is Crazy"?
What the hell is this?
A yakuza?
BA-DUMP
Keep your mouth shut.
And no eye contact.
Do you have a Blu-ray box set of
Crimecatch Policure?
Poli?
Yes, of course,
and there is plenty in stock.
By the way, which season
of the Blu-ray box set would you like?
Because there are three versions
of the Blu-ray box sets.
This is my own personal opinion,
but I would recommend
the second season of Policure.
That's because both the second season's
animation director and scriptwriter
also worked on the highly acclaimed movie.
Also, here's some geeky info.
The director continuously used
a manga style targeted at boy audiences,
so it was worth watching and innovative--
RUSTLE
Here's the money. Get me the goods pronto.
I have my own bag.
And can I have a loyalty card?
STEP
And today is?
Phew, I'm exhausted. Huh?
Whoa!
You startled?
Hey, wait, what?
BEEP, WHOOSH
What'ya doing?
Please come in.
What's going on?
KASUGA DAIMYOJIN,
AMATERASU OMIKAMI, HACHIMAN DAIBOSATSU
What the hell's all this?
CONGRATULATIONS
HAPPY BIRTHDAY, MIKU
His face?
What is all this?
And this is my offering to you!
Oh, what? A present?
Can I open it?
Wow, it's Policure!
No way. You got me this?
Yeah.
Thank you, that's so sweet!
Oh, and, well?
I love this, and it's great, but?
I already own this one.
Already own this one?
-I'll pay the penalty!
-No!
SHATTER
CONGRATULATIONS
EPISODE 6
GIN'S WALK PART 1
I'm going shopping now,
so guard the house, will ya, Gin?
JUMP, CLICK
RATTLE
THUD
We're being watched.
Do you eat grasshoppers?
Well, yes.
Hey, why don't you come down here?
You kidding?
Play with me.
No way.
HISS
Sorry.
Wow, this house is big.
ELIZABETH
What?
happened to you?
It's fine. Leave me alone, will you?
Oh, you're a girl.
Are you sure you're okay? What did you do?
I don't know.
For some reason, I can't move.
I was happily chasing
a butterfly, but then?
A butterfly?
Well, your leash is all tangled up, see?
I see.
Go back that way, then this way, and?
Oh, my?
Don't "oh, my" me!
"Elizabeth"?
What? Hey!
Are you laughing?
Hey, you!
All right.
Well then, I guess I'll go home now.
Going home?
You can't be serious!