The Ultimatum: Queer Love (2023–…): Season 1, Episode 5 - Episode #1.5 - full transcript

-[sultry music plays]
-♪ Will you remember me? ♪

[Mildred] We make each other
happy in the moment,

but it's really hard to see clarity
when it comes to a future with you.

I want to be married now,

and at the end of this experiment
there has to be a decision.

She wants the money
for the ring, for the house, for the kids,

before even taking the next step.

I'm just like,
"I just want to be with you."

You've been so committed to me
for so long.

Give someone else a shot and see
if the connection you have with me

is something you can see yourself
having with someone else.



You think there's a chance
we could be engaged?

Sure.

-It completely changes how I feel.
-I didn't just change your timeline.

-I wrecked your timeline.
-You revolutionized my world.

Things are so great
and so awesome and so seamless.

I wish we could take us
and see how we deal with, like... sex.

[dramatic music plays]

[muffled moan]

[Rae] Whether we wanted it or not,
we're all learning about ourselves,

our partners, our relationships,
and what we want.

-And don't want.
-And don't want.

I feel like you say shit
on camera to make me look bad, mate.

-What have I said that makes you look bad?
-I don't wanna talk about it now.

You accused me.
You can't accuse somebody and run away.



I cannot be the person
that you want me to be,

and I cannot feel bad about that.

I'm asking you to act like you care.
What the fuck have I got to do?

My ex, she was the closest to marriage
I feel like I could get.

But I just feel like, "Okay, I'm bored."

Vanessa's a fake person.

I wish Rae would know that this girl
is not here for the right stuff.

[Vanessa] You're beautiful.

[Rae] I know what you're thinking.

[furtive kissing]

[Rae] Keep doing that. That felt good.

The person who I thought loved me
came here and then slept with that person.

My problem is with the person
my significant other let inside of her.

I have to understand why she trusted you
enough to let you fuck her.

[Yoly] So we all sit down
at the same table,

and Vanessa did not ask me
not a damn question.

She got grilled at our place.

-In your setting?
-In my setting.

-You got the brunt of that, I'm assuming?
-Duh.

-I'm sorry.
-It was hard.

Ours was super shady.

Ours was more up-front.

Lexi just turns to Vanessa and is like,

"Where are you with Rae?
Like, are you into her? Are you not?"

Vanessa laughs and smiles and looks around
and tries to be very like, "Ah!"

Um...

But then there's some information shared,

and everyone's like,
"Does that mean you're into her?"

"Does that mean you're not?
You're conflicting yourself."

-Then she...
-What information was shared?

That is for you and her at another time.

-Huh?
-That's for you and Vanessa.

At another... During your time.

[tense, inquisitive music playing]

-Okay...
-You want me to tell you?

-I mean, I get it.
-If you want me to, I can.

-I don't need you to.
-Okay.

'Cause, I mean, I will,
but... I don't wanna.

-Did you find out tonight?
-So you do want to know?

Oh God.

Vanessa and Rae had sex.

[soft, melancholy music playing]

Um...

Vanessa's saying that it was not...

That there's no sexual attraction
between Vanessa and Rae.

Then Lexi being like,
"Then... how did you end up having sex?"

"Is it platonic? Is it romantic?
Is it sexual? Or is it none of the above?"

And she's saying it's none of the above.
I'm like, "You just fucked this girl

or had sex with this girl
for fun? For what?"

"Or are you here
to fuck anybody around out of..."

Who knows why? No one knows her intention.

She didn't have
anything to say about that.

At some point, Tiff, she's like,

"I would never just fuck someone
just for the sake of it,

for no reason at all."

I'm not in my 20s where you go to a bar
and grab somebody just for fun.

Right.

We're trying to figure out
what we're doing

with the people we came here with,
what we want in our life.

It's so much deeper than that,
and that's not the point of this.

Absolutely.

Um, obviously,
I still care about her and love her.

I don't want to be, like,
this naive, stupid girl

that just feels
good feelings about Vanessa.

And I was trying to be like,
"Mildred, Mal, Sam,

whoever's at this fucking table,
let's not talk about Vanessa."

"I don't wanna talk about Vanessa anymore.
This isn't why I'm here."

I was like, "I'm gonna get up.
I'm so tired of this bullshit."

"I'm not Vanessa.
Vanessa's not here to talk for herself."

"Why are we talking about her?
Are you kidding me?"

"Go tell... Go fucking
throw a beer in her face."

Was you and I's relationship
brought up at all?

I think that I dodged.

-It was frustrating for me as hell.
-Yeah. Mm-hmm.

Very frustrating.

What a night.

-I'm sorry it's rough.
-I'm sorry too.

I'm just sad.

[lively, quirky music]

I'm sad too.

-I miss when we were just happy.
-[Yoly] We are. It was just a rough night.

-[Xander] You feel that way?
-We are... Yes.

I just wanted to...

make sure you're okay.

Were you excited to come home?

Yeah.

[giggles]

Do you wanna...

go to bed with me?

I would love to.

I'm just so happy.

♪ I've got it bad, bad ♪

♪ But it feels so good ♪

[door opens]

Bet you my night was worse than yours.

You look comfy already.

I am comfy. Go get comfy.

No, I'm good.

Rough night.

Rough night.

I knew Lexi was gonna be there,

but I didn't realize she was
gonna get her people on her side.

Okay. This is what she said.

-Okay.
-And it shocked me.

She said you were bragging
about how I was inside of you... to her.

Okay.

Can you believe that?

-I can't imagine myself bragging to that.
-"You put your fingers inside of Rae."

She kept saying that we fucked.

The way she said it was vulgar,
and I was like, "That is not Rae."

I'm literally so uncomfortable right now.

Yeah. They were, like,
making me defend it.

Like, "But why did you do it?"
I'm like, "I don't know."

They weren't taking that as an answer.

What more of an answer can I give?

It didn't mean anything.

We don't have this romantic us...
or, like, whatever connection,

and then they thought that was worse.

We did what we did.
I'm not... I wasn't pressured.

-I'm accountable for it.
-Yeah.

We both are.

It was consensual.

I was attacked from all ends.

I don't fucking know. It was awful, Rae.

[low, moody music reverberates]

[inhales deeply]

[exhales]

♪ Dangerous ♪

♪ Feeling so dangerous ♪

-I hate that it feels like it's all on me.
-What do you mean?

If I had never figured Vanessa out,
if she ever would have slept with Rae.

What?

-Do you think she's out to get you?
-Yeah.

Really don't like her.

That's what's dangerous about her.
There was a obvious shift in energy.

You talked about it,
and it, like, put you in a weird space.

And you have to know that.

Like, I didn't want
to talk about Vanessa so much.

And it's just not fair.

You have to let it go.

Yeah.

[Lexi grunts]

Is there enough room here for you?

[soulful music playing]

[Mal] It's gonna be okay.

♪ Hush, hush, you're fine ♪

♪ Hush, hush ♪

♪ Tonight ♪

[Lexi] I'm tired of her
being a part of my life.

[Mal] By "her" you mean...

Vanessa.

[tense music playing]

[Aussie] Zoey.

Zo-Zo.

Zoey.

-Hi.
-Hi.

Hey.

-How you doing?
-I'm good. How are you?

-I am good now.
-How was it?

Oh man.

Um...

Lexi was getting into it with Vanessa.

It was really difficult. Nobody held back.

-Good. That's really good.
-Nobody held back, so...

That's a good thing.
Never hold back on what you have to say.

I got to talk to Sam,

and very desperately frustrated,

I asked her,

"I really need your advice."

"I have been trying to talk to Aussie,

and I haven't been able
to get past Aussie."

[tense music playing]

The way I reacted
to you accusing me earlier,

maybe I shouldn't have acted
the way I did.

Maybe I should've been calm and patient,

but I think that right now
we owe each other

to actually have a conversation.

I'd hope you know
how much I care about you.

Despite what has happened,
like, I'm real, man, like...

But what has happened?
Because we haven't talked about it.

I could tell you
I care about you a lot too,

but, if you care about me,
then we should have a conversation.

I'm asking for you to open up
and communicate with me.

-And I think that...
-Yeah, we are.

And now we're all... all serious
and talking about what happened...

We don't have to be serious.

That requires communication,
owning up to our responsibilities.

[tense music swells]

We actually both signed up for this, so...

We did sign up for it.
I'm not saying that I didn't.

-I'm just saying I'm surprised.
-You're surprised.

Okay, that's a good feeling to have.
You're surprised.

I was just trying to stay on a high.
I just walked in this door.

But what makes you think
that our conversation can't be a high?

Why do you think
our conversation is negative?

Uh, your tone.

Is that how you associate confrontation?

Your tone of voice and...

My tone of voice can be
so many different levels.

-I can have emotions.
-You can.

Just because the way
you associate your life

with being calm all the time and quiet...

-Okay.
-...doesn't mean I'm like that.

-That's fine.
-We're different.

-We're very different.
-Yes.

-It's okay if I raise my voice.
-It is, absolutely.

It doesn't mean I'm an angry woman.
It just means I want to be heard.

It's also okay for me
not to be ready to have this confrontation

after I just came back from
a night out with my buds, like you say.

And now we're doing this,
and I'm not ready to do this.

I'm not ready to...

Like, I'm...

I want to go back out, actually.
Can I just go back out? Like...

I don't know if you're asking me
or you're telling me,

but I... I'm not in charge of you.

[Aussie] No, you're not. And I think...

You're just showing
that you run away from these...

Okay, if that's what you call it.

-You just run away from everything.
-Sure.

♪ It's madness ♪

[Aussie] If that's what you believe, fine.

Okay.

That's what you're
actively doing right now.

-You're leaving.
-Sure.

-Is this what you do to Sam?
-I dunno.

-Is it?
-When she wants to talk and she's hurt.

This is what you do to her?

You want to ask her?

-You talked to her tonight?
-I did talk to her.

I'm not willing to talk to you
when you're in this mood.

-Thanks.
-Well, this is the only mood I have, so...

♪ It's madness ♪

I'm not going and chasing her.
I'm just letting y'all know right now.

♪ ...madness ♪

♪ How'd it come to this? ♪

[Mildred] It's been two weeks
since my trial marriage started.

I have been myself.

Maybe because I've been
too raw with this experience,

I haven't been noticing her.

I haven't been noticing
that she's not who she is.

Because I've been thinking this whole time
that she's being authentic like me.

I emotionally invested
so much energy in her,

and I don't want this in a marriage.

♪ It's madness ♪

♪ It's madness ♪

[tense, somber music playing]

♪ I'm afraid there's no way
Out of this one ♪

♪ Think about us ♪

♪ Watch it all ♪

[Aussie] Last night was the last straw.

I gotta take care of myself.
I have to prioritize my mental health.

We've had those awesome, amazing,

like time-stands-still moments,

but I don't want to be married to someone

who couldn't communicate
with me effectively,

couldn't give me what I needed
in order for us to talk.

[exhales heavily] So I'm just trying
to grab everything I need

and get the fuck out of here.

I am not running away.

I am taking care of me first
for the first time in a long time.

♪ Here's to the flame ♪

♪ Here's to the flame ♪

I came to find out
if I'm ready for marriage,

and I thought I had resolved it,
but now I feel like...

[sighs]

I don't want resentment.

[voice breaking]
I don't want drama. Far from that.

Marriage isn't the thing
that I made it out to be.

I...

Not ready for it.
Maybe I'm not ready forever.

[moody, somber music continuing]

[Mildred] Go on.

[music trails off]

Hi, Zoey.

Zoey.

[Aussie] Hey, Mildred.

I wish this experience went better
than it did for the both of us.

I was really wanting this to work.

It's a shame it had to end this way.

Thank you for all the laughs
and discoveries we had.

Wish you all the best. Aussie.

[clicks tongue] Aw.

Aussie's things are gone. Um...

And, like, I mean,
it doesn't make a difference for me.

Like, I have no type of emotion
when it comes to it.

This was Aussie's,
and she just, like, left it there.

Like, she could have placed it back there
so that it's not in my way.

Aussie leaving has
nothing to do with me. Like...

I... I mean, that's what you want to do,
then that's fine. You know?

Um, yeah, I just don't...
I just... You know what I do?

I just really, really fucking wish
that she would fucking take out the trash.

Like, I really do wish that.

Because, in this fucking trash,
there's fucking tampons in here.

Um...

I dunno. Is there a way I can call Sam
so she can come take Aussie's trash?

'Cause she likes
to pick up after her, I bet.

[melancholy music playing]

[Mildred sighs]

You can be free, okay?

[sighs heavily]

Just wish she would've
talked or listened to me

when I was going through something,
like regular partners do.

I'm having all these, like, feelings
from, like, being abandoned in my life.

My mother abandoned me
when I was five years old,

and... then my father left,

and then, you know, I just...
I lost my godmother at 12 years old.

It just kept going and going and going.

Then I got married and then they left.

It just feels like that again.

I don't want to be here alone

because I don't want
to start telling myself

that I did something wrong
or that it's my fault.

Because it's not my fault,

and I don't want it
to feel like it's my fault

and it is feeling like that
and I don't understand why.

I don't want to be here alone.

[upbeat pop music playing]

♪ I feel all your love
Spinning around the world ♪

♪ When I'm with you, my love ♪

♪ We lose control and it's okay ♪

I've known Blair
since I was five years old.

She's, like, my best friend.

Are you nervous?

-A little.
-Little bit?

-A little.
-That's cute.

-Yeah.
-Hey.

Oh my God!

Hello.

-Hi.
-I'm so excited...

Come on.

[Blair] Aw!

-Hi.
-This is Yoly.

-With the cutest hair.
-Nice to meet you.

-Thank you.
-I love that.

Thanks.

-Welcome in.
-How have y'all been doing?

-Good.
-Crazy ride?

Yeah, definitely.

Tell me everything.

You know, I've been wanting to start
getting ready to have a family,

be married and everything,
and Vanessa's not on that same boat.

Something that intrigued me about Xander
is just how on the same page we were.

Like wanting kids and starting the family,

even down to, if we had children,
what would we feed them?

I'm like, "Vegetarian, for sure."

So many things aligned. I was like,
"There could be something here."

Yeah.

Is that weird to see?
Just what you just saw?

Honestly, no.

Because I know it's been
a struggle for you.

Definitely.

It all seems to be comfortable
and clicking for you guys.

It's scary, but it's real.

Would you say
that you're happier right now

than you have been in your relationships?

[Yoly] Mmm! Loaded.

[Xander] Loaded.

I will say yes.

This is like what I've been looking for
that I didn't know how much I needed.

Yoly and I are getting along so well.

It's like, "Did I come here
with the right person at all?" Like...

-[Blair] Yeah.
-That's what I have to figure out.

I will say, if you didn't come here
with the right person,

I mean, I think you found, like, a...

She's a catch.

I can tell you're genuine,

and that's something that
I think I have struggled with Vanessa

for the longest time.

-Right.
-It's just been hard.

Not saying I fully dislike her,

but when Vanessa gets in situations
where she is not in a comfort zone,

she acts up.

She puts on a show.

Kind of... "Me, me, me."

I don't know. It's nice. It's refreshing.
To me, it just seems natural.

-[Blair] Cute.
-[Xander] Awesome.

[Xander] It's so beautiful.

-It's a heart strawberry.
-I'm so jealous.

[playful laughter]

We didn't know this was gonna be, like...
the best days of our lives every day.

-[Yoly laughs]
-Aw!

I think we're both pretty taken aback
and shocked by the genuine connection

and feelings and of, like...
"Oh shit. This is real."

-Yeah.
-[Yoly] It freaks me out.

-Stressful, right?
-It's crazy.

-I need to go to the bathroom.
-I'm gonna eat all your sushi.

Eat it. It's good. You're a growing girl.

I honestly wasn't
expecting this to happen...

Me either.

...when you told me you were coming here.

-I love her.
-I mean, Yoly's, like, changed my life.

-This experiment has changed my life.
-Oh my God.

Mm-hmm. It's wild.

Oh my God, I love that.
Do you think you're falling in love?

Are you really asking me that? Duh.

[laughs]

-I feel like, yes, I still love Vanessa.
-Yeah.

And, yes, she still loves Mal.

But we also are, like,
starting to fall for each other.

I don't think you've started to fall.
I think you have fallen. [chuckles]

Have y'all said that yet?

-No.
-Okay.

Why?

I feel like when she says it
and when I say it,

it's gonna really mean something,

and it's probably gonna change our lives
for the rest of, like, forever.

-You're scared that'll be letting go.
-Like dive in.

Definitely.

-So scary.
-Wow.

[upbeat, energetic pop song playing]

Um, my favorite Disney princess was Belle.

She's a'ight.

[teasing laughter]

I think it's also because...

-She's like a six. Just kidding.
-...like, the reading,

and kind and compassionate.
I think I always...

[Tiff] Oh, okay.

Like, she was
very gentle towards the Beast.

He was like... [growls]

And she was like, "Calm down."

Hey. That's like my life.

It is your life.
Actually, I was just thinking that.

[laughs]

Tiff and I, we really had
the rockiest of starts.

I was just completely in the dark

as to how our relationship
was going to develop.

But now there's been
a nice change of energy,

and Tiff and I are having so much fun.

We're really on the same team here,

and I think that's
what we're both looking for.

-I have a serious question.
-Mm-hmm?

What is the sexiest
and least sexiest name?

Don't say Aussie.

The sexiest name?

I would say,
off the top of my head, Tiffany.

Is this actually a compatibility test?

[Tiff] Maybe.

Bertha?

-Oh yeah.
-Or Bartholomew?

-Gertrude. That's like...
-I like the name Gertrude.

But, like, in a sexy way?

[Sam laughs]

This isn't about liking names.

When you get turned on,
do you just imagine a Gertrude there?

No.

-That was my least sexy name.
-Like a Gertrude caressing your hair.

Like, "Hey, my name's Gertrude."

What just happened right now?

Oh my gosh, I need to put this air on.

I just got hot now.

I think I'm sweating. I'm nervous.

Oh my gosh, was that our first time
having intimacy?

No, it wasn't, actually.
It was Gertrude that was doing it.

Oh my God. I cannot.

♪ Got that love, love, love ♪

♪ Never giving up ♪

Tell us what's going on. We have no clue.

I'm looking for my "hell yes."

I want somebody that's gonna give me,
"Hell yeah. You're the person for me."

"You're the person
I want to spend my life with."

"I don't need to ask more questions.
There's no ifs, ands, or buts."

If there are,
we'll figure them out when they come.

-Were you ready to get married to Rae?
-I was ready.

I saw that life for us.

She was the person
I wanted to spend my life with.

But Rae wasn't ready?

I had gotten my...
"I'm ready to move in, but..."

Or like, "You check all my boxes..."

I still want to get married, and I think
one of the beautiful things about Mal is

Mal has shown me that everyone's
"hell yes" looks a little differently.

I was the one who received the ultimatum.
I did want to be married.

I really thought that you need
to have all your ducks in a row.

Buying a house with this person,
having children, what does that look like?

Logistically, I just wanted everything
to, like, align before just proposing.

It was never a no for me.
It was just a timing thing.

Okay.

Also, I know my partner at the time
to show up in relationships really strong.

When she's in love, she's in love.

I was also like,

"What makes me different than
where you've been? Why am I the one?"

[Alison] So it seems like
every relationship she was in,

she's like, "Okay,
let's go to the next step."

From my perspective, yes.

But I am ready for marriage.
I would do marriage.

There obviously are big differences,
I think we're both realizing,

between our exes
and the people we're living with now.

They're probably different.

You both know each other's exes
because you dated them.

-I dated Rae too.
-So how was that?

-She's cool.
-She's a nice girl.

-She's very nice.
-How's she doing?

[tense music playing]

You don't know?

Rae's doing all right.

Um, she's having herself a bit of a time.

Rae did have, like, an intimate moment
with someone else here.

[Michael clears throat]

[Lexi] Girl Rae's living with.

She's living out her dreams
of being an actress.

So you're not sure
she's here for the right reasons.

I'm about as close to sure as I could be.

Then don't you feel bad for Rae,
put in that predicament?

I feel horrible for her.
I think there's some blame there.

-I can't blame Vanessa for what happened.
-Yeah, but some actresses are really good.

What happened between her and Vanessa
is a me and Rae problem,

not a me and Vanessa problem.

You think Rae feels bad
about what happened?

I'm just not sure.

I mean, you were broken up.

And what about your, um, ex?

She's with... She's with a nice person.

Okay.

She happens to also be with the person
that Rae's living with's ex-girlfriend.

-Oh yeah. Here we go.
-Oh my gosh.

-All three of you are intertwined.
-Yeah.

[Lexi] Welcome
to the queer female experience.

That means y'all are
attracted to the same type of people.

That's true.

I'm happy you're meeting Mal
'cause, in any regard,

she's gonna be a part of my life forever.

Like, I feel so sure of that.

-[Mal] I agree.
-She's not going anywhere.

I have to tell you from my heart,

I don't think you know enough yet
to know what it's really like

to be in a so-called "marriage"
or to be dating seriously.

I mean, yeah, we're scared
because you may be rushing into it.

If you think that you're gonna be able
to get married after this, that's a lot.

-Marriage is not easy.
-We've been having the best time.

If we were together for six more months,
I don't think it would change.

It's great you're getting along,

but I don't think
you guys are ready for any next steps.

That's my belief. Do you feel that?

I mean, are you ready to make
such a commitment to each other like that?

I don't see why every single piece
has to be in order before you get married.

It's just weird seeing
that you were ready, you weren't ready.

So now you got to figure out,
are you ready?

I would trust her that,
if we were to take that next step,

we can figure out the day-to-day stuff.

I think what's important is
I know where she stands on family,

where she stands on children.

I know where she stands
on financial goals.

-[Mal] We know where we stand on culture.
-Yeah, absolutely.

Those things we're very in sync about.

I think what's really awesome about us is,

to me, it's really important
that I learn how to show up best for you.

You're gonna make me cry.
That's very kind.

[Mal] She does the same thing.

Black women's hair is a thing.

It's kept us from getting promotions.
It's kept us from getting jobs.

My natural hair, just the way that it is.

And Lexi's like,
"Okay, our hair looks different."

"What do you need from me to support you?"

And I'm like, "This is wild."

It's not, "Can I touch your hair?"

It's not a weird thing.
She's like, "What do you need from me?"

And potentially equip our children too.

So I love it here.
I'm... I'm like, "This is what it's about."

That means a lot,

because, most important thing for us,
we want Lex to be happy.

We want her to be with someone
that makes her happy,

the best version of herself.

Whoever that is, we will love you
and support you, and that's it.

We want our kids to be happy.

I've sold a lot of engagement rings
over the last 30 years.

I have had people come to me
that have known each other for five days.

I've had people that have been dating
for nine, ten years.

It's always interesting to me,

because sometimes
the least likely couples make it.

Sometimes the most likely couples
fizzle quickly.

There's no rhyme or reason.

I think Lexi's amazing.
I think she would make a great wife.

[phone buzzing]

-I have to take a work call.
-Okay.

-Let me give you guys love.
-[Alison] Give ya lovin'.

-I hope to see you again.
-Thanks, Mal.

-Nice to meet you.
-Nice to meet you.

-Really nice to meet you.
-Thank you.

-Have fun.
-Okay.

Bye-bye.

-I have to say, she's great.
-She seems really nice.

-I knew you'd love her.
-Very sincere and kind.

-And I think she really cares about you.
-I know.

Do you see yourself... Do you miss Rae?

It's been a little hard the last few days
with Rae. I'm going through a lot.

But, like, what Mal deserves is
for me to be present here,

and then deal with
where I see myself with Rae.

There's a big part of me
that really loves Rae.

She's somebody I've always
seen myself spending my life with.

I've envisioned kids
and all that with her.

I love Mal. Genuinely.

I think Mal's great, and I adore her.

Whatever happens,
we're gonna be supportive.

I mean, we still care about Rae.

She spent time with us,
and we're gonna love whoever you're with,

because that person makes you happy.

That's what I'm here for.
I came here for love.

I'm trying to figure out
if that's what I'm gonna end with.

And I don't know.

[energetic pop song plays]

♪ No one understands
The way that you move me ♪

♪ You're pulling me in deeper ♪

♪ 'Cause I can't get enough ♪

[energetic singing continues]

♪ Got me with that kind of love ♪

It's hard to describe my dad
'cause he's this successful businessman,

but he's also a big goofball.

I don't know what version
we're gonna get today.

You haven't seen him in a while,
so I'm happy you get to have this moment.

-I'm happy you're here.
-I get to share the moment.

[Vanessa] The man, the myth, the legend.

Big Papa has arrived.

Dad!

Hey, great to see ya.

-[Rae] Hi, Mark. Nice to meet you.
-Nice to meet you.

We're going with the handshake?

I'm from east coast. We would hug,
but I don't know that everybody does.

Nice to meet you. Great.

So the reason that we're both here is
that we were both given an ultimatum

by our ex-girlfriends.

-Xander, she does want to get married.
-Yeah.

She's been so clear about that.

For a long time,
I've been like, "I don't want that."

And it's not just
I don't want to marry her.

I don't even know
if I want to get married.

Did you share that sentiment?

-Uh, mine wasn't as similar.
-No.

-I've always wanted to get married.
-[Mark] Yeah.

Um, I just didn't know if I was ready yet.

A marriage, it's forever.
You're... You're saying yes to a forever.

-I don't know when I'll ever be ready.
-[Mark] Yeah.

[gentle, curious music plays]

When the institution of marriage started,

people didn't live to 80, 90,
like we do now.

[Vanessa] True.

They died at 25 or 30, so it wasn't
a "life sentence" quite in the same way.

I've heard people say marriage should be
like a lease, like a seven-year lease.

At the end of seven years,
you decide whether you want to renew.

If you don't, you both walk away.

So...

[spluttering laugh]

And this is where
I get my idea of marriage.

-Holy hell.
-[Mark] No, I...

You know, I'm divorced for 15 years now.

-I've dated a little bit.
-[Vanessa] A little bit!

If, at the two or three month mark,

I think that they see
a different future than I do,

I end the relationship.

Time is so precious.

-Be selfish.
-Yeah.

You better be.

That's the reality, or else
you're trying to make someone else happy.

Exactly. That's so true.

I'm in the IT field.

And the one thing that I will tell you
that comes out of IT is

99% right is 100% wrong.

If you were to get married again,
what would the percentage be?

100%. No question.

No question.

If you think about it,

the person giving you the ultimatum...
is 100% sure.

They want you.

They want to spend their life with you,
and you, you know, ideally...

They want you to feel that way back.

The ideal situation is
you come out of this

knowing yourself better
and knowing what you want.

And if that's harmful to someone else,
that may be a gift to them as well.

Yeah.

♪ Without a sound
We hit the ground, yeah ♪

♪ Look at us now, look at me now ♪

[brooding pop music continuing]

[Xander] Date night.

You're gonna be tie-dying my thongs.

Okay.

Kidding. T-shirts, for sure.

[chuckles]

This is fun.

I know. I'm excited.

[Xander] I haven't done this
in a long time.

All right, hair's up. We mean business.

Do you want a V-neck?

No.

It's such a queer thing
not to show your clavicle,

and people don't understand.

So I'm not showing this.

Like, I am serious.

I feel like I go to sleep at night
having fun with you,

and I wake up having fun with you.

That's probably the cheesiest thing
I've said in my life.

[gentle, affectionate music playing]

You flirting with me?

To me, the stability is fun.

And I'm happy and I'm calm and in peace.

Trust, stability, honesty.

I feel like that you are,
like, all those things.

-Know what I mean?
-You're blushing.

-Huh?
-[Yoly] You're blushing.

[Yoly chuckles] Yes.

[Yoly] So you heard my past
of feeling like I fall in love fast

and the up and down and the chaos
that that comes with... That comes with it.

Here I go, tearing up. Um...

I'm scared of feeling
in love with you, so soon.

It's... It's scary because I don't...
I don't know. It's just scary.

It's definitely scary.

It also scares me to think about

what you're feeling
and where that's gonna go.

You know? But it's hard to not...

-Where it's gonna go when? After this?
-Mm-hmm.

It's the future, right?

I don't feel like I fall in love easily,

but I feel like that this experience
has worked so well already and I, like...

texted you last night,

and I said that we weren't just
the byproduct of the experience.

Yeah, that was random.
I'm like, "What is she sipping on?"

-But I feel like we're not just that.
-We're not.

[Xander] I love you.

[Yoly] You're not alone
in feeling that way. I...

It's terrifying, but I love you.

[gentle, affectionate music continuing]

I know that I've known
for a while that I've loved you.

For a while?

Which is weird and scary,
and it didn't make sense for a long time.

But it's also those moments
where I look at you, then you look at me.

-You're like, "What?"
-Mm-hmm.

And I'm like, "I love you."

♪ It's like I got a rainbow
Inside of my head ♪

♪ I know it's not over yet ♪

♪ Cloudy skies I know just shine, shine ♪

♪ Give me gray and gold
Lighten up my soul ♪

That was really sweet.

-Hi.
-[Mal] Okay. Okay.

[Mal] Alicia is one of my best friends.

Alicia is the person I call
when it comes to life decisions,

and the decision to marry someone
is the biggest decision of my life.

-[Mal] You comfortable there?
-I'm okay here.

-Are you good?
-Yeah, I'm good.

Alicia, this is Lexi.
Lexi, this is Alicia.

And Lexi's...

Um...

This... I'm her wife. Right now.

[quirky, confused music plays]

I'm introducing Lexi to my entire circle,
my entire community.

That is what I'm doing.

So you live with this person
for how many weeks?

Three.

And then you decide between three
to four years of being in a relationship

versus three weeks of...
with another person?

Yes.

What?

I chose this.

-I know what's happening. It's fine.
-Just blink twice if you're not safe.

This isn't the Get Out movie.

Everything is fine.

I've never seen you shocked
about anything.

We've know each other
for, I don't know, 12-plus years.

We were in college.

I think we met in, like, '07.

You want to know how old I was in '07?

-[Mal] No, I don't.
-I do want to know.

I need to know.

In '07 I was 11 years old.

[Mal] Well?

So how old are you now?

-Twenty-four.
-Years old?

Or what? Months?

Oh, that's a cute red flag
waving in the wind. I'll leave it at that.

I'm shocked because
Yoly has been that person.

Like, that's my homie.

But I think, for me,
it's just been a matter of timing.

I just wanted to make sure
I could provide all the things

that I thought marriage comes with.

[Lexi] But I think,
as we've had more conversations...

I think her views of marriage
are changing.

-Yeah. For sure.
-[Alicia] Okay...

[Alicia] Mmm.

I can tell you, for me, I want Mal
to be a part of my life forever.

Hey, you know, it's lovely.

-Mal is such a loveable person...
-Mm-hmm.

...and she's good and kind to everyone.

But I feel like a lot of people confuse
Mal's kindness for something else.

When it's simply just
her being a good human.

A lot of women will be like,

"Oh, that girl, you know,
I feel like she's feeling me."

When it's not like that.

[Lexi] For nothing else, like,
what we have in this process,

Mal is always honest with me.

You just can't negate
the love Mal has for Yoly.

-Know what I mean?
-Fair.

If Yoly were to come in here right now

and be like,
"F all this, let's do it now,"

what would you say?

We would have a lot to talk about.
I can tell you that.

-So it's gray.
-Yeah.

It's gray right now?

[moody pop music playing]

-Hey!
-[Natasha] Hey. What's up?

-What's up?
-How are you?

Good. How you doing?

-Hi. Who are you?
-Hi. I'm Sam.

Sam?

[Sam, Natasha] Nice to meet you.

-Sort of. We haven't met yet, but...
-No.

I don't know what's going on,
so fill me in.

-Oh my God, how you been?
-I've been good.

-Yeah?
-Yeah.

So who... who are you, Sam?

[Sam chuckling]

-Somebody's got to fill me in.
-[Tiff] Oh yeah.

Where's Mildred right now?

I couldn't tell you. I... I don't know.

So you guys broke up?

Yeah, we broke up.

So I broke up with my ex too.

Okay.

And then, coincidentally,
my ex is Mildred's spouse.

Why did you do this?

Um, I did it because Mildred and I were
constantly going back and forth

in cyclical patterns,
and we weren't getting anywhere.

I felt like I had to join this experience
in order to for us to gain more clarity

if there's anyone else out there,

or if it's actually our problems
that we need to work on.

-I feel like that makes no sense.
-Tell me. How so?

I dunno. I feel like that's a cop-out.

Because if the relationship isn't working,
then you should end it. Right?

Maybe you're hanging on to something
that either might be over

or will be one day, just to...

I don't know. 'Cause you're not ready
to let go, maybe?

[gentle, inquisitive music playing]

Breaking up with Mildred,
it's not gonna be the last time.

They're very on and off.
I don't think it's healthy.

I don't think Tiff and Mildred are
right for each other,

because they can't communicate.

If they want to be together,
they have a lot of work to do.

-You're in a trial marriage?
-Mm-hmm.

So how did you end up together?

I mean, we honestly had
such a good connection.

And I, like... Sense of humor
is also one of my tops,

and so Tiff was making corny jokes,
like, every single date.

[Tiff] I got a goofy side.
I got a... dark side.

I got a, you know, like a wild side.

I threw it all on the table.

What I really liked about her
was that she was like, "Oh, okay."

"Sure. What else do you have?"

You know? Some people
would be running for the fucking door.

Are you hooking up now?

-No.
-We haven't.

-Why?
-No.

Why?

[quirky music playing]

Good question.

How is your sleeping arrangements?

We have to share a bed.

You share a bed?
And you haven't done anything?

Sam?

-You haven't slept together.
-[Sam] No.

-Have you kissed?
-No.

How do you know
if the intimacy is there or not?

We don't.

-Can't buy the car without...
-[Tiff] I know.

We haven't even, like, held hands.

Hold hands right now.

[awkward music playing]

She's waiting for...
Can you hold hands with her, quick?

No! I'm not doing that right now.

-Yeah.
-Yeah.

-I spilled my drink because...
-I don't...

I just got nervous...
Here, I'll hold your hand.

-That's all you had to do.
-I know.

It doesn't have to be sexual.

What's the whole point if it's not sexual?

-Intimacy doesn't have to just be sexual.
-Yeah.

I'm just saying,
why throw yourself into this

and not at least try something?

I mean, I'm noticing
her body language and you,

and I think that you're the one
that's closed off and not her.

Tonight, try to kiss each other,
try to touch each other,

try to be intimate.

And, if you don't like it,

then be like, "Fuck it. I tried." Right?

I don't know about that.

[chuckles]

No, but I just want to ask you a question.

If she was to, tonight,
touch you, cuddle you, try to kiss you,

would you turn away?

♪ Running in circles
Like a hamster in a wheel ♪

♪ Trying to be
The perfect humans for each other ♪

No.

♪ Better love ♪

♪ Better love ♪

♪ Better love ♪

[upbeat pop singer vocalizing]

♪ I believe, I believe, I believe
We're something special ♪

♪ I will do it all for you ♪

[Xander] You're so fucking hot.

[Yoly laughs]

Scale of 1-10,

how glad are you the tide did not
come up and wash us away?

[Xander] I dunno.
That sounds pretty hot to me too.

[Yoly] Mmm!

Watch me roll around with you
in the water.

Picture this. A hot day in Hawaii.

You and I...

rolling in the sand, water's coming up.

[sensual music playing]

Maybe you should close your eyes.

Okay.

Xander, if there's a fucking ring there,
I'm screaming.

Very loud.

Bitch.

[Yoly laughs]

-When do I look?
-Now.

[boisterous laughter]

Oh, it matches my nails.
You thought about it so well.

-I know. I knew it was your color.
-It's so special.

Shove it in there.

What? It fits like a glove.

♪ Give me your love
Give me your love, ooh ♪

♪ The moment I saw you I knew you would ♪

[Yoly] More.

♪ Change everything ♪

♪ Give me your love, oh ♪

♪ Give me your love
Give me your love, oh, oh ♪

I'm seeing how much stuff I had written
since this started.

[Tiff] Wow.

It feels so long ago.

I mean, it's crazy that this is gonna be
our last night together.

[Tiff] I know.

I'm really going to miss
being able to just talk about things

and just be open.

[tender music playing]

It's nice to be able to have
a deep connection with you

and to be able to be vulnerable,

but in a way where
you cannot feel so judged

and you can just kinda show up as you are.

It's kind of actually scary
thinking about that,

going back in with our exes.

Because you're just like, "Damn."

"Like, am I... am I gonna have
this chill safe space?"

-Am I gonna, like...
-Right, right, right.

"Are my feelings gonna be validated?"
I think that's huge.

What I will say
from the bottom of my heart

is that you are beautiful, strong.

Thank you so much
for being my first wife ever.

We popped each other's wife cherries.

Aw! [Sam laughs]

[Sam] Thank you so much.

-Are you gonna have withdrawals?
-Yeah, a little bit.

Mildred sees me crying a little bit,
she's gonna be like, "It's gonna be okay."

"I'm not crying about you."

"I'm not crying about you, yet."

-"Yet."
-"Gimme a second."

I like how you unconsciously said "yet."

It was Tiff and Sam this entire time.

They're gonna come up with some ship name
for us and combine Tiff and Sam.

-Yeah. Stam.
-Yeah.

Stiff.

Stiff. [laughs] That's better!

-That's so good.
-Stiff.

[Tiff] At the choice,
I felt like I made a mistake.

The only thing I could think about
was Mildred.

But now I've gotten
more comfortable with Sam,

and I feel like there's
a sense of trust there.

There's a sense of growing understanding
of someone.

Where I... I feel the safety
to just kind of bring myself to the table.

This is how I feel like
we should have been this entire time.

I feel like, tonight,
I want to big spoon you.

[flirty, upbeat pop music playing]

I'm waiting.

Still surprising me,
even till the very end.

♪ No one ever taught you how to open up ♪

[Sam laughing]

-Hold on...
-I do feel very awkward doing this.

What is that? Your leg?

-I felt something stiff.
-Oh my God, I can't...

Well...

Hey, that's good progress, though.

From "I don't want to touch your hand"
to "Will you big spoon me?"

[pop singer vocalizing]

♪ When it's me and you
When it's me and you, honey ♪

I don't even want to pull a suitcase out.

I'm a very last-minute packer.

-[Rae] I'm doing it.
-You're doing it.

Wow.

-I normally wouldn't put it on the bed.
-[Vanessa] Throw it on there.

We're not gonna, like, lick this, are we?

Is your plan after you put that down
you're like, "Okay..." [slurps]

Sounds fun.

Doesn't it?

What should I pack first?

Start with all the things
that are on the floor.

[Rae] Meh.

I'm gonna start in the closet.

The only way I can come across is
if I roll over...

Roll into my arms.

Excuse me.

Let me make this
as full body of an experience as I can.

Thank you. Hold on. Okay. You're good.

Okay, I'll get a suitcase out.

Ay, ay, ay.

Tomorrow, when we move back in
with our exes,

is gonna feel real heavy, huh?

We'll see.

The next three weeks are gonna
really tell me a lot.

Yeah.

I was really excited this morning,
thinking about how I was gonna see Lexi,

but that's also me thinking,
like, everything's normal.

But I know that's not gonna be
what the, um, air is

when we first see each other again,

because of the night that happened here.

I don't know.
I'm just feeling... a lot of anxiety.

Now we have to see,
what does our future look like?

How do we get back to our normal,
and is that what we want?

The next three weeks are gonna be a lot.

A lot for us to figure out
how we fit back together,

or do we fit back together.

There's just so many questions
that I think will be answered

within the next three weeks for us.

What are you gonna wear
the first night that you see your ex?

Are you going sexy?

-[Rae] Underneath the dress?
-Yeah.

A bra and panties.

Same. I'm normal.

-That's what I was thinking too.
-Were you?

[Vanessa] It's just weird
to pack outfits and think,

"This is what I'm gonna wear
when I have a really big conversation."

[Rae] Mmm.

I want to plan it out
'cause I don't want to say anything

that's like too, um, leading towards like,

"Obviously, I want to be with you
and marry you, like..."

[Rae] Why, though? I don't get that.

She's been claiming you so hard,
why can't you do that?

That's what all of
our ultimatum givers are waiting for.

-It could be embarrassing, but...
-I like hearing that, Rae. Thank you.

My life will change.

You know, whatever...
whatever she's coming at this with,

like, it's going to be life changing.

That's a big thing.

So I've got to look hot.

[laughs]

You're so...

[Mal] Ah!

What is in there? What did you do?

I just used a finger.

That's crazy.

I acted surprised. I wasn't.

I was like, "Ah!"

I'm assuming you're of the same mindset

where there's not one person
for everyone, right?

There's multiple people you can love?

-Like a soulmate?
-Mm-hmm.

-You think you have multiple soulmates?
-Yeah. I think you can.

I think you're one of mine.

I do.

Oh shit. [laughs]

You don't need to say it back. It's... fine

I'm just sitting up here on my ledge.

A lot of pressure.

-How do you know that?
-I don't know.

Have you ever met somebody
that's this easy three weeks in?

No.

So you think that's coincidence,
experience, or...

I don't know.

Now I know what
a good marriage looks like for me.

Does the marriage with the person
I came with look like that too?

I could see a world
where we could be together.

I could too.

Actions are gonna speak louder than words.

You want to get ready for bed?

Last night.

The very last night.

♪ Now breathe in deeper ♪

♪ Like I'm underwater ♪

♪ See the people flicker like flames ♪

It's my final night with Mal,
and it's really bittersweet.

I think I'm trying to hold on
to every last moment with Mal

because we have something really special.

Mal's my wife until they force us
to sign the divorce papers.

I'm not thinking
about the next three weeks

because I'm focusing
on the moment I'm in now,

and I honestly wish
this kind of didn't end.

♪ And that kid
Who's scared of the thunder ♪

[Lexi] So sexy.

♪ Used to wait
For the lightning to strike ♪

Because we only have tonight, I'm like...

You know, I'm just feeling more.

I'm trying not to shy away from you
getting to that next step.

[Mal] Damn.

[Mal] Hmm.

I didn't know
this conversation would go there.

And, next week, I will be a mess. I know.

It really sucks for me to be, like,

leaving.

Well, you're not going anywhere for me.

I don't want this to end.

Yeah.

I don't... I don't know how to deal...

I don't know
how to best deal with what's happening.

I tend to pull away from,
like, the people that I love

'cause it hurts to know what we're doing.

It's really me just trying
to protect myself.

From what, though?

Feeling. Feeling sad.

I had the best trial wife
that I could have.

Choosing you was easy.

Having to let you go sucks.

Like, I have to.

[brooding electro-pop song playing]

[Margaux barking]

Margaux, you crying? You should be.

-She's leaving us.
-[Xander] Don't tell her that.

Use your words. Go ahead, tell her.

-[Margaux whines]
-I know.

She sat down.

-She's like, "I didn't know that part."
-[Xander laughs]

You're looking at my lips.
What? Wanna kiss them?

-You keep looking at 'em.
-You calling me out?

[gentle pop ballad playing]

♪ Give me more time ♪

Not bad.

Coming here, I did not in a million years
think I would fall for another person.

I am scared because
I wasn't in the worst place with my ex.

She's gonna want to pick back up
where you left off. I imagine, right?

-I think. We don't know.
-We don't know, but...

Like, that... I mean, Mal's family.
Mal's amazing in so many ways.

But we also still haven't made
the move with commitment.

So I'm just kinda like...

That's definitely how I have felt
with Vanessa.

Meeting her in high school,
and then we were given this chance

when both of us had recently come out,
and it just felt very, like...

"Oh, of course.
This is gonna be my partner forever."

But she doesn't want to get married.

I'm like, "You don't want
to get married to me."

Obviously, she should want
to get married to me, right?

A hundred percent.

I mean, I'm tired of it.
I'm tired of feeling that I'm not enough.

And that I am not getting
the opportunity to show up how I want to,

which is how I feel I've been able to do
for the past three weeks with you.

Really?

I feel like we're already
ready to be committed.

It's just hard to be telling
both the people that we love

that we have this thing,
and we've had it for a whole three weeks,

while we haven't talked to them.

I'm worried about your ex
putting her claws in you.

You're not gonna let her
fuck you up in the mind?

No.

Promise?

[tender, emotional music plays]

[Xander] I really am scared to think about

what it's gonna be like
when you're back with your ex.

I am worried that it's gonna be
as amazing as our past three weeks,

and that, I don't know,
then that I could actually lose you.

I can feel like I'm
the right person for you.

You feel that way?

Yeah.

But I want you to decide
what's best for you. You know?

I don't want Mal telling you either.
I want you to decide.

You have touched and impacted my life
in so many ways, and you've showed me...

God, I hate...

Um...

No, you've just showed me that I...
Because I'm not, like, difficult to love.

You literally were just so effortless
and easy and wonderful.

You're just... You're so fucking great.

Thank you for loving me the way you do.

♪ I will fly away ♪

[Xander] I'm gonna miss you so much.

[Yoly] Me too.

What are you gonna miss?

Your soft lips.

[Yoly] I love you.

[Xander] I love you.

I don't know how
I'm gonna sleep without you tomorrow.

♪ This is the moment ♪

[furtive moaning]

♪ This is the moment ♪

[Yoly] Oh God.

[Yoly] I don't want to lose you.

It's just so messed up.

[Xander] They're literally gonna
have to pry me off of you.

♪ This is the moment ♪

♪ I'm breaking all the rules ♪

♪ I'm playing it so cool ♪

♪ I'm playing it so cool, baby ♪

♪ I'm breaking all the rules ♪

♪ I'm playing it so cool ♪

♪ I'm playing it so cool, baby ♪

♪ 'Cause I'm never gonna ever stop ♪

♪ I'm always gonna shake it up ♪

♪ Always gonna shake it up ♪

♪ 'Cause I've almost reached the top ♪

[song trails off]