The Sylvester & Tweety Mysteries (1995–2001): Season 1, Episode 1 - The Cat Who Knew Too Much - full transcript
In New Orleans, Granny and Tweety visit the annual canary crooning competition.
Only five more miles to New Orleans.
Five more miles
of the fabulous song stylings
of Puny-do Domingo.
Goll doggit!
That's some singer you
got there, chere.
Oh, thank you.
And, though I'm often mistaken for her
I am not Cher.
Uh, the name is Granny.
No, no, you see, chereis just
a term we use down here.
It means lovely lady.
My name is Louie Z. Anna.
Pleased to make your
acquaintance, Granny.
Oh.
Oh, now you should enter this bird
in the Cajun Canary
Crooning Competition
at the Mardi Gras.
Mr. Zanna, we were last year's
Crooning Competition champions.
Well, I am in the presence
of someone special.
- Granny.
- Ooh.
Now, who could that be?
I'm Dora. Your maid.
Here are some towels.
Dogs. Cats.
Don't expect me to clean up
after your hairy beasts.
Especially birds.
H-hello?
Oh, why, Mr. Zanna.
Of course, Louie.
Uh, w-what? Lunch?
Why, yes, I'm free.
One o'clock. I'll see you then.
Goodbye, Louie.
Oh, hot diggity! I got
myself a live one!
Now, Sylvester, be a good kitty
and make sure Tweety continues
to practices his singing.
He must be ready for
tonight's big contest.
And, Hector, you keep
an eye on Sylvester.
Back before you know it.
Eugh! Smells like liver in here.
'What's the matter?
Cat got your tongue?'
Nothing like a big old pussy dog
to protect you from a
bad old pussy cat.
Hmm. I should do an upbeat number.
I thought I saw a thug.
I did. I did see a thug.
Oof!
Duh!
'Down here, Mugsy.'
Duh, gee, boss.
Uh, how's come you're fooling around
in a little bird cage?
Help! I'm being canarynapped
by two thugs! Help!
Nobody lifts my lunch
and gets away with it.
My, I can't decide what to order.
Everything smells so good.
Oh, then let's ask old Chef Jumbo Laya.
Hey, Jumbo, I wonder
if you could recommend
some of your Cajun
delicacies to Granny here.
Well, little lady, we
got the canary gumbo
canary kabobs, fried
canary, apricot canary
poached canary, canary etouffee
canary tartar, canary
casserole, that's good eating.
Canary souffle, canary on the
half shell, stuffed canary..
- Old maid?
- What did you call me?
Duh, nothing boss.
Uh, I was just talkin' about the game.
Shut up and deal.
Ahh.
- Old maid!
- Do not call me that.
Mugsy, close it, that window.
Birds are prone to flying
and out a window would
be the perfect place
for a bird to go.
Duh, okay, boss.
You pussy cat lovers might
wanna close your eyes.
I'll never play the bass fiddle again.
Thanks again, Louie. See you
at tonight's competition.
Hmm. A handshake instead of a kiss.
Was Hector a good watch doggy
while Granny was away?
Here, have some beads.
Oh.
What I had to do to get these.
Oh, how pretty.
Eek! You bad old cat.
What have you done with Tweety?
No more jack mackerel for you. Oh!
Hector?
Amanda's finally marrying young Mort
and we got all this racket.
Shut the bird up.
Mugsy, answer the door.
I demand to see the warden.
Immediately!
Duh, "I represent the
Acme Vacuum Company
"and I'd like to demonstrate
our newest model
"The Inhaler 2000. Dirty carpet?
It'll clean it.
"Musty drapes? It'll unmust them.
"Bird feathers? It'll suck
them right up its power hose.
"All of this can be yours
for three small payments
of 99.99."
Duh, it's caught my interest.
Minnie Julep!
So you two let the bird get away!
Watch the bird!
I don't wanna have to tell you again!
I find these short trips refreshing.
I've got to find Tweety
and still get all of
us to the Cajun Canary
Crooning Competition in time.
Now who could that be?
Forgot to drop these cheap
candies on your pillow.
'Pets in the rooms.'
No way am I cleaning up
all those bird feathers.
Feathers?
'Bless his heart.'
'Tweety left us a trail to follow.'
Let's go, Hector.
Ooh.
Sylvester, you look like
something you dragged in.
Where's Tweety?
Ooh, here I go again.
It's about time you got here.
You know what to do.
Ooh, I got an uneasy feeling
down in my little gut.
So I was wrong.
I'm happy to report
that all is going exactly
as planned, Mr. Big.
And now, we're very excited
to welcome back our next act
the reigning champions,
Granny and Tweety!
The bird's put on weight and
the old lady needs a shave.
Why, the nerve of those two.
I would never wear a dress like that.
Good work, Sylvester.
I'm making a citizen's arrest.
For fraud, birdnapping
and wearing that dress with that hat.
Duh, gee, Rocky.
I sure hope Mr. Big don't
find out about this.
- Shut up.
- Mr. Big, eh?
I should have known you
two weren't capable
of coming up with a plan like this.
A Mr. Big.
Mr. Big, hmm..
Oh, there goes that blasted
tape recorder again.
Could someone turn that
thing off so I can think?
Duh, it is off.
Tweety.
It's times like these I
feel unconditionally used.
Tweety.
Tweety.
Yes, Tweety, that's a nice picture.
But we've got to get you out of here.
Well, isn't that lovely?
It's you and me at last
year's competition.
Louie Z. Anna?
What's he doing in this picture?
Oh, now you should enter this bird
in the Cajun Canary Crooning
Competition at the Mardi Gras.
Mr. Zanna, we were last year's
Crooning Competition champions.
Now I remember.
Louie was last year's first runner up.
'So he's Mr. Big.'
That's right.
Why?
Well, they say our love
won't pay the rent.
You did all of this just for the money?
I was gonna take the contest winnings
then sell off this little delicacy here
to Jumbo and be on my way.
But seeing as how
you've changed my plans
I'll just take this canary
and make like a bird.
Goodbye, chere.
Stop that scoundrel!
Granny and Tweety the judges
have awarded you first prize
in the Cajun Canary
Crooning Competition
for your rendition of "Camptown Races."
Ooh-eeh, that there
is the biggest canary
I ever done laid my eyeballs on.
Pretty soon there's gonna be
too much fat in Cajun food.
Five more miles
of the fabulous song stylings
of Puny-do Domingo.
Goll doggit!
That's some singer you
got there, chere.
Oh, thank you.
And, though I'm often mistaken for her
I am not Cher.
Uh, the name is Granny.
No, no, you see, chereis just
a term we use down here.
It means lovely lady.
My name is Louie Z. Anna.
Pleased to make your
acquaintance, Granny.
Oh.
Oh, now you should enter this bird
in the Cajun Canary
Crooning Competition
at the Mardi Gras.
Mr. Zanna, we were last year's
Crooning Competition champions.
Well, I am in the presence
of someone special.
- Granny.
- Ooh.
Now, who could that be?
I'm Dora. Your maid.
Here are some towels.
Dogs. Cats.
Don't expect me to clean up
after your hairy beasts.
Especially birds.
H-hello?
Oh, why, Mr. Zanna.
Of course, Louie.
Uh, w-what? Lunch?
Why, yes, I'm free.
One o'clock. I'll see you then.
Goodbye, Louie.
Oh, hot diggity! I got
myself a live one!
Now, Sylvester, be a good kitty
and make sure Tweety continues
to practices his singing.
He must be ready for
tonight's big contest.
And, Hector, you keep
an eye on Sylvester.
Back before you know it.
Eugh! Smells like liver in here.
'What's the matter?
Cat got your tongue?'
Nothing like a big old pussy dog
to protect you from a
bad old pussy cat.
Hmm. I should do an upbeat number.
I thought I saw a thug.
I did. I did see a thug.
Oof!
Duh!
'Down here, Mugsy.'
Duh, gee, boss.
Uh, how's come you're fooling around
in a little bird cage?
Help! I'm being canarynapped
by two thugs! Help!
Nobody lifts my lunch
and gets away with it.
My, I can't decide what to order.
Everything smells so good.
Oh, then let's ask old Chef Jumbo Laya.
Hey, Jumbo, I wonder
if you could recommend
some of your Cajun
delicacies to Granny here.
Well, little lady, we
got the canary gumbo
canary kabobs, fried
canary, apricot canary
poached canary, canary etouffee
canary tartar, canary
casserole, that's good eating.
Canary souffle, canary on the
half shell, stuffed canary..
- Old maid?
- What did you call me?
Duh, nothing boss.
Uh, I was just talkin' about the game.
Shut up and deal.
Ahh.
- Old maid!
- Do not call me that.
Mugsy, close it, that window.
Birds are prone to flying
and out a window would
be the perfect place
for a bird to go.
Duh, okay, boss.
You pussy cat lovers might
wanna close your eyes.
I'll never play the bass fiddle again.
Thanks again, Louie. See you
at tonight's competition.
Hmm. A handshake instead of a kiss.
Was Hector a good watch doggy
while Granny was away?
Here, have some beads.
Oh.
What I had to do to get these.
Oh, how pretty.
Eek! You bad old cat.
What have you done with Tweety?
No more jack mackerel for you. Oh!
Hector?
Amanda's finally marrying young Mort
and we got all this racket.
Shut the bird up.
Mugsy, answer the door.
I demand to see the warden.
Immediately!
Duh, "I represent the
Acme Vacuum Company
"and I'd like to demonstrate
our newest model
"The Inhaler 2000. Dirty carpet?
It'll clean it.
"Musty drapes? It'll unmust them.
"Bird feathers? It'll suck
them right up its power hose.
"All of this can be yours
for three small payments
of 99.99."
Duh, it's caught my interest.
Minnie Julep!
So you two let the bird get away!
Watch the bird!
I don't wanna have to tell you again!
I find these short trips refreshing.
I've got to find Tweety
and still get all of
us to the Cajun Canary
Crooning Competition in time.
Now who could that be?
Forgot to drop these cheap
candies on your pillow.
'Pets in the rooms.'
No way am I cleaning up
all those bird feathers.
Feathers?
'Bless his heart.'
'Tweety left us a trail to follow.'
Let's go, Hector.
Ooh.
Sylvester, you look like
something you dragged in.
Where's Tweety?
Ooh, here I go again.
It's about time you got here.
You know what to do.
Ooh, I got an uneasy feeling
down in my little gut.
So I was wrong.
I'm happy to report
that all is going exactly
as planned, Mr. Big.
And now, we're very excited
to welcome back our next act
the reigning champions,
Granny and Tweety!
The bird's put on weight and
the old lady needs a shave.
Why, the nerve of those two.
I would never wear a dress like that.
Good work, Sylvester.
I'm making a citizen's arrest.
For fraud, birdnapping
and wearing that dress with that hat.
Duh, gee, Rocky.
I sure hope Mr. Big don't
find out about this.
- Shut up.
- Mr. Big, eh?
I should have known you
two weren't capable
of coming up with a plan like this.
A Mr. Big.
Mr. Big, hmm..
Oh, there goes that blasted
tape recorder again.
Could someone turn that
thing off so I can think?
Duh, it is off.
Tweety.
It's times like these I
feel unconditionally used.
Tweety.
Tweety.
Yes, Tweety, that's a nice picture.
But we've got to get you out of here.
Well, isn't that lovely?
It's you and me at last
year's competition.
Louie Z. Anna?
What's he doing in this picture?
Oh, now you should enter this bird
in the Cajun Canary Crooning
Competition at the Mardi Gras.
Mr. Zanna, we were last year's
Crooning Competition champions.
Now I remember.
Louie was last year's first runner up.
'So he's Mr. Big.'
That's right.
Why?
Well, they say our love
won't pay the rent.
You did all of this just for the money?
I was gonna take the contest winnings
then sell off this little delicacy here
to Jumbo and be on my way.
But seeing as how
you've changed my plans
I'll just take this canary
and make like a bird.
Goodbye, chere.
Stop that scoundrel!
Granny and Tweety the judges
have awarded you first prize
in the Cajun Canary
Crooning Competition
for your rendition of "Camptown Races."
Ooh-eeh, that there
is the biggest canary
I ever done laid my eyeballs on.
Pretty soon there's gonna be
too much fat in Cajun food.