The Ray Bradbury Theater (1985–1992): Season 2, Episode 5 - The Man Upstairs - full transcript
In Paris, the weird traveler Mr. Koberman stays in a small pension nearby the Seine River owned by the grandmother of the boy Douglas. Mr. Koberman's strange habits and his aversion to silver cause Douglas to be suspicious that he is a vampire. One morning, when the student Miss Treadwell does not return to the inn, Douglas spies the guest and concludes that whatever the stranger is, something must be done about him. This takes the story to its surprising conclusion.
[music playing]
RAY BRADBURY
(VOICEOVER): People ask,
where do you get your ideas?
Well, right here.
All this is my
Martian landscape.
Somewhere in this room
is an African veldt.
Just beyond, perhaps, is a small
Illinois town where I grew up.
And I'm surrounded on every
side by my magician's toyshop.
I'll never starve here.
I just look around, find
what I need, and begin.
I'm Ray Bradbury, and this is--
well, then, right
now, what shall it be?
Out of all this, what do
I choose to make a story?
I never know where the
next one will take me.
And the trip-- exactly
one half acceleration,
exactly one half terror.
[music playing]
WOMAN: Dougie!
Jerky time!
Hi, Mr. Dumas.
I mean, bonjour.
Douglas.
Surgery, Dr. Douglas?
- Yes.
- Ready?
Yeah.
Foul fiend!
[shouting]
[groaning]
It only hurts when I laugh.
[laughter]
Oh, I'm going to miss
you and your jokes.
Do you think your parents
would let me keep you?
Oh, Dougie.
Boy, all this great stuff.
Grandma, are we all
like that inside?
No.
You're all eyes and stomach.
Operation almost completed.
[ringing]
Dougie, could you
see what they want?
OK, Grandma.
Sure.
[speaking french]
I don't speak French.
Good afternoon.
Is the owner here?
She's busy.
Well, I wish to rent a room.
They're all rented.
We're full.
Sorry.
MARGARET: Douglas!
Douglas.
Come in, sir.
Come in.
Douglas, make yourself useful.
Show mister-- mister--
Koberman.
Show Mr. Koberman to room 12.
Koberman.
What kind of a name is Koberman?
Thank you, madame.
Well, I shall rest a
little before dinner.
Don't!
Dinner is at 6:30 sharp, and
if you're late coming down,
the soup will get cold.
Grandma fixes it so it will.
Thank you.
GRANDMA: Dougie!
Douglas, Monsier Dumas,
dinner in 15 minutes.
[speaking french]
Supper!
Well, sounds like our
new guest is awake.
While everybody
here sleeps forever,
more vanishing young women.
[inaudible] is dead.
I was there last night.
Found her this morning,
white like snow.
Not a drop of blood left in her.
Monsieur Dumas, fold up that
paper and roll up your tongue.
Yes.
No death talk, place.
No murders while we eat.
Young ladies
like you should be
extra careful, Miss Treadwell.
Couldn't hurt.
Why?
Nothing could ever happen
to little me, could it?
DUMAS: No.
Oh, Mr. Koberman.
Good evening.
Yes.
It is.
This is, uh, Monsieur Dumas.
The world's greatest artist.
Ah.
And bookseller.
I am Madame Margaret.
Greatest grandma.
And this, uh, Emmie Treadwell.
Greatest student ever.
And you, sir?
Greatest what?
Uh-- well, I am the greatest,
uh, traveler in the world.
Well, now, that
must be fascinating.
And the reason for your travels?
Business, pleasure?
A little of both.
But, uh-- mostly pleasure.
Enough questions.
Let Mr. Koberman eat his dinner.
Dear me, I forgot
your silverware.
Oh, don't worry, madame.
I brought my own.
Boy-- wooden knife,
wooden fork, wooden spoon?
Your carve them yourself?
Uh, harmless eccentricity.
MARGARET: Help yourself,
Monsieur Dumas.
You, too, Miss Treadwell.
Please.
Won't you help
yourself, Mr. Koberman?
[cough]
Sound of silver.
Breaks threads all
through my system.
By the way, madame, there
will be no need for you
to prepare me a lone meal.
My hours are, uh--
irregular-- and I rarely
eat during the day.
As you wish, Mr. Koberman.
Should you change your mind--
No.
No.
Thank you, madame.
Wanna see my magic trick?
[twanging]
[clanging]
Mr. Koberman, your name--
is it Czech?
Hungarian.
[clanging]
Excuse me.
I-- I am no longer, uh--
hungry.
Thank you.
And good evening.
Good evening.
Uh--
Douglas.
What did you do?
Yeah.
What did I?
You And these are my favorites.
From my dad, two
old silver dollars,
and a small Chinese
coin from that man who
stayed here last week.
Plus all your tips.
Careful, Douglas-- with all
that money, your grandma
will be charging you
for your room and board.
Those coins are for
collecting, not for spending.
Would you like some more coffee?
Oh, no, I have to
go to the library.
Don't come home too late.
I won't.
If I did, Douglas
would protect me.
Wouldn't you, Douglas?
DOUGLAS: Sure.
Bye, everybody.
MARGARET: Bye.
Oh, Mr. Koberman.
Out for an evening promenade?
Yes.
Some evenings I can walk.
Forever.
Wait, Mr. Koberman!
You wouldn't happen to have
any coins for my collection,
would you?
I'm sorry, no.
Bright boy you
have, there, madame.
Soon to be in bed, by this time.
[imitating gunfire]
[imitating gunfire]
Holy cow.
Young man, what
were you doing?
Just-- just looking.
Just looking?
Yes, sir.
And-- what do you see?
Things.
Places.
All kinds of worlds.
Blue ones.
Red ones.
All different.
All kinds of worlds, is it?
Oh!
But that's mine!
I--
[clattering]
Oh, I'm-- I'm terribly
sorry, my child.
How clumsy of me.
I shall get you new binoculars.
Better ones.
Ones that show you
your real world.
Again, my apologies.
You just wait.
Ah, it works!
I guess she's sleeping
late this morning.
Studies so hard.
Poor soul.
[knocking]
Miss Treadwell?
Hello?
Hello, Mr. Koberman?
Mr. Koberman?
Wake up.
Gosh.
What are you?
Boy, so many ladies.
No!
And why the sudden interest
for the human anatomy,
my young friend?
Mr. Dumas, how long ago
was the Eiffel Tower built?
That was in 1900,
Paris [inaudible]..
Why?
What if a man was alive
then, and still alive now?
And still the same age?
And what if he's a
vampire, or a monster,
like I see in the films?
But no one knows, because
he don't act like vampires.
I mean, maybe this vampire
don't go to bed at dawn
and get up at sunset.
He just walks
around any old time.
And-- and what if he
can run around at noon,
as long as he
hides in the shade,
and sleeps all kinds of hours?
And what if he has
pictures of thousands
of ladies on his wall?
And what if-- he
likes lady students?
[speaking french]
You go much too fast for me.
Miss Treadwell-- she'll never
come back, will she, Mr. Dumas?
What do you mean, Doug?
Mr. Dumas, are vampires
really afraid of silver bullets,
or any kind of silver?
Afraid it might-- kill them?
Have you got any silver, Doug?
[thunder]
Grandma, look at this.
Oh my god.
Where did you get that?
Up there.
Did you see those things
down on the kitchen table?
Yes.
Dear god.
What were they?
The boy said that
Koberman lived after he'd
taken those things out of him.
He kept on living.
What was Koberman, then?
A monster?
A vampire?
I don't know.
Well, he certainly
wasn't human, anyway.
- Then what killed him?
- You'll see.
Oh-- do you think
those coins did it?
Yeah.
Maybe.
Well, put them back in place.
All right.
Looks like the boy
made a wise investment.
[theme music]
RAY BRADBURY
(VOICEOVER): People ask,
where do you get your ideas?
Well, right here.
All this is my
Martian landscape.
Somewhere in this room
is an African veldt.
Just beyond, perhaps, is a small
Illinois town where I grew up.
And I'm surrounded on every
side by my magician's toyshop.
I'll never starve here.
I just look around, find
what I need, and begin.
I'm Ray Bradbury, and this is--
well, then, right
now, what shall it be?
Out of all this, what do
I choose to make a story?
I never know where the
next one will take me.
And the trip-- exactly
one half acceleration,
exactly one half terror.
[music playing]
WOMAN: Dougie!
Jerky time!
Hi, Mr. Dumas.
I mean, bonjour.
Douglas.
Surgery, Dr. Douglas?
- Yes.
- Ready?
Yeah.
Foul fiend!
[shouting]
[groaning]
It only hurts when I laugh.
[laughter]
Oh, I'm going to miss
you and your jokes.
Do you think your parents
would let me keep you?
Oh, Dougie.
Boy, all this great stuff.
Grandma, are we all
like that inside?
No.
You're all eyes and stomach.
Operation almost completed.
[ringing]
Dougie, could you
see what they want?
OK, Grandma.
Sure.
[speaking french]
I don't speak French.
Good afternoon.
Is the owner here?
She's busy.
Well, I wish to rent a room.
They're all rented.
We're full.
Sorry.
MARGARET: Douglas!
Douglas.
Come in, sir.
Come in.
Douglas, make yourself useful.
Show mister-- mister--
Koberman.
Show Mr. Koberman to room 12.
Koberman.
What kind of a name is Koberman?
Thank you, madame.
Well, I shall rest a
little before dinner.
Don't!
Dinner is at 6:30 sharp, and
if you're late coming down,
the soup will get cold.
Grandma fixes it so it will.
Thank you.
GRANDMA: Dougie!
Douglas, Monsier Dumas,
dinner in 15 minutes.
[speaking french]
Supper!
Well, sounds like our
new guest is awake.
While everybody
here sleeps forever,
more vanishing young women.
[inaudible] is dead.
I was there last night.
Found her this morning,
white like snow.
Not a drop of blood left in her.
Monsieur Dumas, fold up that
paper and roll up your tongue.
Yes.
No death talk, place.
No murders while we eat.
Young ladies
like you should be
extra careful, Miss Treadwell.
Couldn't hurt.
Why?
Nothing could ever happen
to little me, could it?
DUMAS: No.
Oh, Mr. Koberman.
Good evening.
Yes.
It is.
This is, uh, Monsieur Dumas.
The world's greatest artist.
Ah.
And bookseller.
I am Madame Margaret.
Greatest grandma.
And this, uh, Emmie Treadwell.
Greatest student ever.
And you, sir?
Greatest what?
Uh-- well, I am the greatest,
uh, traveler in the world.
Well, now, that
must be fascinating.
And the reason for your travels?
Business, pleasure?
A little of both.
But, uh-- mostly pleasure.
Enough questions.
Let Mr. Koberman eat his dinner.
Dear me, I forgot
your silverware.
Oh, don't worry, madame.
I brought my own.
Boy-- wooden knife,
wooden fork, wooden spoon?
Your carve them yourself?
Uh, harmless eccentricity.
MARGARET: Help yourself,
Monsieur Dumas.
You, too, Miss Treadwell.
Please.
Won't you help
yourself, Mr. Koberman?
[cough]
Sound of silver.
Breaks threads all
through my system.
By the way, madame, there
will be no need for you
to prepare me a lone meal.
My hours are, uh--
irregular-- and I rarely
eat during the day.
As you wish, Mr. Koberman.
Should you change your mind--
No.
No.
Thank you, madame.
Wanna see my magic trick?
[twanging]
[clanging]
Mr. Koberman, your name--
is it Czech?
Hungarian.
[clanging]
Excuse me.
I-- I am no longer, uh--
hungry.
Thank you.
And good evening.
Good evening.
Uh--
Douglas.
What did you do?
Yeah.
What did I?
You And these are my favorites.
From my dad, two
old silver dollars,
and a small Chinese
coin from that man who
stayed here last week.
Plus all your tips.
Careful, Douglas-- with all
that money, your grandma
will be charging you
for your room and board.
Those coins are for
collecting, not for spending.
Would you like some more coffee?
Oh, no, I have to
go to the library.
Don't come home too late.
I won't.
If I did, Douglas
would protect me.
Wouldn't you, Douglas?
DOUGLAS: Sure.
Bye, everybody.
MARGARET: Bye.
Oh, Mr. Koberman.
Out for an evening promenade?
Yes.
Some evenings I can walk.
Forever.
Wait, Mr. Koberman!
You wouldn't happen to have
any coins for my collection,
would you?
I'm sorry, no.
Bright boy you
have, there, madame.
Soon to be in bed, by this time.
[imitating gunfire]
[imitating gunfire]
Holy cow.
Young man, what
were you doing?
Just-- just looking.
Just looking?
Yes, sir.
And-- what do you see?
Things.
Places.
All kinds of worlds.
Blue ones.
Red ones.
All different.
All kinds of worlds, is it?
Oh!
But that's mine!
I--
[clattering]
Oh, I'm-- I'm terribly
sorry, my child.
How clumsy of me.
I shall get you new binoculars.
Better ones.
Ones that show you
your real world.
Again, my apologies.
You just wait.
Ah, it works!
I guess she's sleeping
late this morning.
Studies so hard.
Poor soul.
[knocking]
Miss Treadwell?
Hello?
Hello, Mr. Koberman?
Mr. Koberman?
Wake up.
Gosh.
What are you?
Boy, so many ladies.
No!
And why the sudden interest
for the human anatomy,
my young friend?
Mr. Dumas, how long ago
was the Eiffel Tower built?
That was in 1900,
Paris [inaudible]..
Why?
What if a man was alive
then, and still alive now?
And still the same age?
And what if he's a
vampire, or a monster,
like I see in the films?
But no one knows, because
he don't act like vampires.
I mean, maybe this vampire
don't go to bed at dawn
and get up at sunset.
He just walks
around any old time.
And-- and what if he
can run around at noon,
as long as he
hides in the shade,
and sleeps all kinds of hours?
And what if he has
pictures of thousands
of ladies on his wall?
And what if-- he
likes lady students?
[speaking french]
You go much too fast for me.
Miss Treadwell-- she'll never
come back, will she, Mr. Dumas?
What do you mean, Doug?
Mr. Dumas, are vampires
really afraid of silver bullets,
or any kind of silver?
Afraid it might-- kill them?
Have you got any silver, Doug?
[thunder]
Grandma, look at this.
Oh my god.
Where did you get that?
Up there.
Did you see those things
down on the kitchen table?
Yes.
Dear god.
What were they?
The boy said that
Koberman lived after he'd
taken those things out of him.
He kept on living.
What was Koberman, then?
A monster?
A vampire?
I don't know.
Well, he certainly
wasn't human, anyway.
- Then what killed him?
- You'll see.
Oh-- do you think
those coins did it?
Yeah.
Maybe.
Well, put them back in place.
All right.
Looks like the boy
made a wise investment.
[theme music]