The O.C. (2003–2007): Season 1, Episode 16 - The Links - full transcript

Previously on The O.C.

Looks like I'm dateless tonight.
We'll be your date, right?

Yeah, right.

He's a cool guy, right?
We don't have a lot in common.

Besides your girlfriend.

So you chose Anna?
Kind of, yeah.

Can we still all hang out?
You cool with that?

Sure.

All this talk about plans,
growing up. It's a routine.

You're not nice
to Kirsten, she is the only

reason why we're
putting up with you.



Hey!
I'm a cop.

He tried to buy
three grams of coke from me.

You must like me little
to get me off jail?

That was Sandy.

Are you gonna tell her?
You are.

Howdy.
Hey.

Sorry to just pop in.
Is it okay if I come in?

Yeah, sure.

Of course.

It's just temporary.

Hmm?
The place.

It's just temporary.

My dad lost his job,
so my parents split.

I don't judge.



I do, however, apologize.

The other night,
Marissa, was...

It's okay,

really.
No, no, it's not.

I hit rock bottom.
A new low, even for me,

but it... it
was eye-opening.

Called the arms.
I called my parents.

I came clean about everything,
and they were so supportive.

I talked to my sponsor.

I'm going to start going
to meetings again, and...

I totally was honest with
Natalie about all our issues.

We're getting
back together.

Wow. That's amazing.

It never would've happened if
Ryan hadn't come to my rescue.

He called Mr. Cohen.

I mean,

busted trying
to buy coke?

I should still
be in jail.

Ryan helped me get
a second chance.

I want to say thanks.

Oh, so, do you want
his number?

I want to take you
and him to Palm Springs.

My family has a place there
right on PGA West.

It'll be great.
It'll be great.

We can bring all your friends:
Seth, Anna, Summer, even Luke.

You can meet my
folks, meet Natalie.

Palm Springs?
Oh, it's so much fun.

The weather there is
perfect. Do you golf?

No, not really.

I'll teach you.
Ryan, too.

Well, I do really want
to meet Natalie.

Oh, she's dying to meet
both of you guys.

Little getaway,
just the gang... on me.

It's the least I can do.
It sounds amazing.

You know, let me just call Ryan
and ask him.

( piano and acoustic guitar
strumming gentle melody )

S01E16
The Links

* California, here we come

* Right back where
we started from *

* California

* California...

* Cal...

* California

* California...

* Here we come. *

SANDY: Alright, knees bent.
Not quite that much.

That's it--back straight,
eyes over the ball.

Feet a little closer together.

Just off your left
foot-- there you go.

Not quite that close together,
but that's okay.

Alright, just let it
hang like a pendulum.

Nice and easy.
Nice and easy. Keep breathing.

Nice and easy.

Nice... I'll stop.

I'll just... I'll-I'll just go
right over here.

Got it!

Alright, one more.
No, no more.

Come on, you were so good
at the driving range.

I don't play golf.

SETH: Not true.
You don't play well.

And there's plenty more to do
in Palm Springs other than play golf.

You can spa.
I don't spa.

You don't play golf. You don't
spa. What do you do?

Yes, Ryan, what exactly
do you do besides musicals

and punching people?

He's very good
with the ladies.

Ah, the ladies.

He is very good with the ladies.
Very good with the ladies.

He's standing right here
holding a golf club.

You don't know how to use it.

That's why I'm not going
to Palm Springs.

Yes, you're going. Listen, you
did something nice for Oliver.

He wants to repay you by taking
us to his mansion over there.

Without you, there is no deal.
Why can't you understand that?

Oliver, has a mansion on a golf course?
Also, a ski chalet in Mammoth.

Wow, guess,
sometimes it's good to be Oliver.

It's great to be Oliver.

But you or I don't care about
those sort of things, do we?

Marissa-- I don't think
she cares, either.

You think?
I don't know,

but, you know, she's a little
bit impressed.

Look over there, huh?
Who's got himself a pool house?

With ocean views. Come on, take
another shot. Nice and easy.

So... Oliver's parents
are going to be there?

Yeah.
Have you met 'em?

No. But if they're anywhere near
as cool as Oliver is, then...

( smacks ball, glass shatters )

I don't do nice and easy.

KIRSTEN: Do we trust this Oliver?
No.

But we trust our guys, his folks
are supposed to be there.

Hmm, and Seth knows
to call hourly?

Yeah, and... we're just going
to worry all weekend.

They're golfing.

Yeah. When we gonna get you
on the golf course?

Not today. Do you know
who's coming home today?

Oh, God, the ugly Americans
are coming back.

So, when's your father
and Julie getting in?

Arrived from Paris this noon.

Confirming Europe's worst
suspicion on Americans, I guess.

I'm guessing this means that
Hailey'll be on the way out.

What's she going to do?

She's gonna hit your father for
a blank check and then take off?

Was there any doubt? Last time,
she was gone for two years.

This time,
it could be three, and...

Well, who knows what kind
of trouble she can get into.

Morning.
Oh, hey, Hailey.

Can I get you anything?
I got those pumpkin muffins,

and there's coffee, and there's
orange juice without pulp.

Dad comes back today, huh?
Right, yes, he does.

So, what time will we be seeing him?
Dinner, 7:00.

Oh, I'm sorry
I'll have to miss that.

Julie Cooper's not coming,
is she?

I can't believe Dad's with her.
She's with him for his money.

And that is
such an unattractive quality.

Um... pumpkin muffin?
Yes, darling.

I think it'll be fun.
You do?

What could be fun than joining
you guys for Couplefest 2004?

You and Ryan, Oliver and
Natalie,

Anna and what's-his-face Cohen,
me and Luke.

God, it should be all time.
It won't be like that.

It'll give us a chance to get
outta town, hang out.

It'll be fun.
What's more fun than watching

some nerdy neurotic

bat his eyelashes
at his droopy pixie chick?

So, clearly, you're okay with
being just friends with Seth?

Uh-huh. Clearly.
I was being sarcastic.

So was I... which we never were

before Cohen showed up
and taught us all irony,

the jackass.

Hey, Sum, look, if it's too hard
to be around him,

them, then why go?

Why do this to yourself?
Because, Coop, I told them

that I was fine with it.

I told them that I was cool
just being their friend.

I have a reputation.

And I can't sabotage the trip
if I'm not there.

Summer.
Okay,

what do you think about
laxatives in his coffee, huh?

Um...
No,

okay, dead frog in his X-Men
underoos-- that's good.

No. No, I've got it.

While he's sleeping,
I slip his hand in warm water.

It totally makes you pee
your bed,

and Anna wakes up, sees he's a
bed wetter, and that's awesome!

That is just... awesome.

Mm-hmm. I've lost my mind,
haven't I?

Yeah, a little bit.
Hmm. And over Seth Cohen.

Jimmy, hey, I'm glad I ran into
you. Still on for dinner, right?

Uh, dinner, yeah.
You okay?

( sighs ): No, I'm not, really.
I just...

I just.. I just got turned down

for a manager's position
in this place.

Apparently, that kid's better
suited to the job than I am.

Maybe we should reschedule.
I'm not feeling very social.

We can't. The Lighthouse closes
down tonight forever.

It's the last chance to get
the best chicken parmesan.

Well, first the Lighthouse
leaves Newport, and then me.

How-how poetic.
You mean, you're leaving?

Well, there's
nothing here for me.

There's no opportunities.
There's no second chances.

I've got a brother in Phoenix,
he called me, this week, and...

You can't leave.
Well, I- I can't stay.

I'm on my way to work. I know
we have positions available.

No, Sandy, you can't.
It-it... No, you've done...

It'd be nothing glamorous.
Just entry-level kinda thing:

paralegal work, file clerk,
and that sorta thing.

Thanks. I mean, whatever it is,
uh, just as long as I can...

I can stay with Marissa.
I mean, I-I-I can't afford

to support the both of us much longer.
We'll figure it out.

Thanks.
You can't bail on me tonight,

'cause I'll be stuck with Hailey
and Caleb, I mean, it's...

it's the least you can do.
Yeah.

Alright.
Thank you.

Hey.
Hi.

Alright.
And so it begins.

Guess, I'm just gonna
have to get used to this.

Seth's in his room.

It's upstairs to
the left, right?

I'm just gonna make sure he's
packed so he doesn't hold us up.

You know, we need to
be nice to Summer,

'cause she's afraid this
weekend's gonna be

a bunch of couples doing,
like, you know, couply stuff.

And it's not?
Mm-mm.

So, we'll be hanging out
with, uh, say... Oliver.

Oliver and Natalie.
They made up.

Why? You don't have a
problem with Oliver, do you?

No.

I mean... guy shows up
out of nowhere

and suddenly is hanging around
all the time.

Yeah, guy shows up
out of the blue,

knows no one, abandoned
by his family, sound familiar?

Little bit.

You did something nice for him,
and now he wants to repay you.

By playing golf?
Yeah, well, it'll be fun.

You've never seen
me play golf.

Then I guess, it'll be
especially fun for me.

Uh-huh.
Mm-hmm.

I love Palm Springs. A little
golf, a little schvitz.

I don't know.
It all sounds kind of old.

Yes, Anna, it does sound old.
Yeah.

And somewhere inside me

there's an old Jewish
man that's very excited.

Ick.
( laughing )

I think that came out a little disgusting.
Yeah, kind of.

But seriously, there's
the geriatric part of me

that actually loves, like,
a good early Bird special,

a little bit of shuffleboard,
some mahjong.

Well, when you put it that way..
Seriously, think about it.

Most old people are too
actually old to enjoy being old.

Oh.
Not me, though.

I'm ready to retire right now
to a life of leisure.

Palm Springs is my Mecca.
What I'm looking forward to

is a weekend alone
without our parents.

Oh, I see where you're
going with this,

'cause we can have dinner
as early as we want.

Ooh, it'll be a couples weekend,
and we can have our own room.

Be still, my pacemaker.
Hmm. You're a dirty old man.

Hey, if the orthopedic
shoe fits...

( laughs )

Mmm.

Hello, friends. Are you guys
almost ready to go?

Yeah, totally, we're there.
Hey, Summer.

Well, that is just great,
you guys... Oh, sorry.

God, Anna, it looked like
you were doing so well, too.

Don't worry about it.
Thanks for being so forgiving.

We are going to have
so much fun this weekend.

All of us hanging out...
as friends.

( sighs )

Did you rob
a liquor store, Luke?

Cohen, you can't play
golf without a buzz on.

Hey.
Good tip, Bagger Vance.

Oh, blender.
Nice thinking, Cohen.

Yeah, no, it's actually a
humidifier. I get nosebleeds.

How romantic.
I think it's sweet.

It'll make our room like
a tropical paradise.

Yes, it will.
Oh, you know, it's so nice

how you find all of Cohen's
weaknesses so adorable.

I'm not weak, okay?
I'm just delicate.

( laughs ):
Ew.

Oh.
( sighs )

It looks like you and I are
the only ones without anyone.

Okay, um, I'm just gonna
lie down in the driveway

and just back your truck
right up over me. Mm-hmm.

What's up, guys?
Hey.

What's the matter?
It's Natalie.

It's over.

I don't know. I'm sorry.
Maybe, we shouldn't go.

Yeah, maybe we shouldn't.

What happened?
I don't want to talk about it.

No, you need to.
And you know what?

We need to get outta town.
Maybe, we can talk about it

on the ride down or...
Well, is that okay?

If I ride with Oliver? Or maybe
we could all go together?

No, no. You-You guys go.
I'll see you down there.

Hey, Chino,
why don't you ride with me?

Can I ride with you guys?

Ah, yeah, sure.
Shotgun.

Uh-huh.
Great.

Thanks for understanding.
Yeah.

* Yeah!

* Away from me! *

Dad, Julie,

uh, you're early.
Bonjour, Kiki.

Cheese wheel?
It's brie.

Oh, thanks.
How was France?

Oh, aside from the French...

Where's Hailey?

Uh, she's showering
I-I think.

I-I wasn't expecting
you so soon.

He couldn't wait
to see his precious Hailey.

Couldn't even lemme go home
and take a shower.

How's she? How's she looking?
Too thin?

Oh, she looks good.
Her spirits are high.

She's high?
No, her spirits, mood.

She's up.

So, she's on uppers?
No, she seems balanced.

You changed your hair.

Right! Do you like it? Isn't it
francais? He doesn't like it.

HAILEY:
Hey, Dad.

Hailey.

It's great
to see you.

HAILEY:
Mmm.

( soft chuckle )

Julie, your hair.
Hailey, you're here.

So, I haven't seen you since...
How long has it been?

HAILEY:
Oh, Dad.

Are you going to start with me already?
Fair enough.

Just tell me what you've been
up to. All your adventures.

Cal, thought we could swing
by the house maybe and...

Kiki, could you make us
some lunch?

I'm starved.
So, tell me about Costa Rica.

How about lunch?
We have brie.

* It's not unusual
to be loved by anyone *

* It's not unusual
to have fun with anyone **

Brought enough beer?

Ah, you never know, buddy.
You never know.

* But when I see you hanging
about with anyone... **

Hey, you made it.

Yeah.

We tried following you,
but it was hard to keep up.

Sorry. Guess, I got all
wrapped up in my saga.

Yeah.
I got a little distracted.

This place is awesome.
Where's the fridge?

I-I don't want these
to get skunked.

Yeah, I'll show
you the kitchen.

( sighs )

You brought enough beer?

LUKE:
Everybody keeps saying that.

How was it?
It was okay.

We talked.
He talks mostly.

I think he just wanted
someone to listen.

How's he?

He's a little fragile,

I think getting
out of town will help.

Hope you guys weren't talking
about me when I was gone.

Sorry for taking your
girlfriend away from you,

but don't worry,
she's all yours.

I wasn't worried.

Right.

Okay.

SUMMER: I was trying to give you
some culture, Cohen.

Yeah, well, the audio version of
The Da Vinci Code's not culture.

Yeah, well, it's a true story.
( phone ringing )

ANNA:
Hi.

God.

Hey, Dad. How are you doing?

Wow, six calls in, um, two
hours. That's a new rec... Yeah.

No. We...

We're still fine,
believe it or not.

Okay.

Well, what I can do then
is call you from every hole.

Cool?
Okay, great.

Bye.

Where are your folks?

Yeah, their plane
got delayed in Zurich.

I don't think they're going
to make it this weekend.

But... welcome to their
humble abode.

Thanks, man.

Let's get everyone settled
before we hit the links, huh?

I set up two tee times.

I figured Seth, Summer,
and Anna could be our threesome.

Let me show everyone their room.
And last but not least...

Oh, I forgot.

This is the room
with the two twins.

Uh, do you want
to switch rooms,

or we can push
them together?

Oh, no, this is fine.
It's great.

I'm just going
to go change.

I'll help you
with the beds.

Hopefully, it won't be
too uncomfortable.

Alright, thanks.

I really appreciate
you being so cool

about Marissa
and I being friends.

Well, yeah, no problem.

I mean with everything you two
just went through with Luke,

the last thing you need is
another guy not to trust.

With Luke?

Yeah.

You thinking maybe he and
Marissa were getting back?

That was a while ago.

I'm not judging.

I mean, if anyone should
have trust issues...

What does that mean?
Just your background.

Marissa was filling me in on
some details on our ride down.

She was?

Yeah. But I mean, just in terms
of how amazing it is

that you're so healthy,

well-adjusted,

considering.

Considering?

( door opening )

( laughs )
So, how do I look?

Perfect.

Yeah, great.

Sandy Cohen working
on a Saturday.

Tom Willington, how are you?
Playing catch-up, huh?

Trying to buy some time away
from the wife and kids.

Oh, how touching. Listen,
I've got a question for you.

I know Celeste in records
is going on maternity leave,

and we haven't found anyone yet.
You know Jimmy Cooper, right?

Jimmy Cooper?
Yeah.

Are you out of your mind?

This is one of the most
reputable firms in the county.

What'd it do for our profile
to hire its notorious criminal?

Ah, there's no such
thing as bad publicity.

Really?
Come on, before he went down,

there was no one better than
Jimmy, no one smarter.

Everyone loved him.
Until he ripped them off.

He made a mistake,
he's paying it.

He doesn't deserve
a second chance?

Not in our firm,
not in this lifetime.

The best thing you can do
around Cooper is stand upwind.

Don't get his stink over you.
Oh, he's a good guy, Tom.

Yeah, well, then, why don't you
go into business with him?

KIRSTEN:
She so looks like Mom, it's scary.

He takes one look at Hailey,
and he can't say no.

And right now, she's
telling him of her plan

to help the indigent population
of some depressed country,

and all she's looking for
is some all-expense paid bender

to Amsterdam or Thailand.

It's amazing
he can't see it.

She's only being nice
to him for his money.

Every time she vanishes,

it's for a little while longer.

The trips get wilder and wilder.

One of these days,
I don't think she's coming back.

You know, you're the only
one he listens to, Kirsten.

If you're really scared, she's
going to disappear again,

you need to stop him
from letting her.

How's this?

Pretty good.

You've just, uh, got to get
your hips into it a little more.

You know? You got to go...

( rhythmic humming )

Yeah... Oh, oh, boom.

( laughs )
One, boom.

I think
she's got the idea.

Rock and fire.
Mm.

OLIVER: For a beautiful girl,
that is one ugly swing.

Got to follow that, huh?

Wow.

I don't suppose you were using
creative visualization?

My face as the golf ball?

Can't wait
to see your short game, buddy.

I think your ball
is in the trees.

That's bad, right?

Thanks for carrying
my golf bag, Cohen.

I really think I
threw out my back.

If your back hurts, Summer,
why don't we take a golf cart?

What, are you, like,
against nature?

This isn't nature,
this is a golf course.

I think
I have a hernia.

You guys, this way we can spend
more time together as friends.

How come when she says "friends"
it sounds like a threat?

It's her inflection.

What? We did say we would try
and be friends, right?

Who's she gonna talk to, Luke?
Oh!

That guy only recently learned
how to walk upright.

Oh... uh, Cohen?

Could you help me find my ball?

Anna, stay back.
There might be poison ivy.

Um, Summer, I don't want
to get poison ivy.

Cohen, I thought
you were my friend.

Okay.

Wow, it looks like Summer's
not the only one

who lost their balls.

OLIVER:
Ow.

Too bad.

I could hurt
that guy.

So could I.

Am I trying too hard
with him?

All I want
is to be friends,

and I just feel
like he hates me.

No. I mean,
he likes you.

He just...

Right-- trust issues.
Can't win them all, I guess.

Hey, nobody's looking.

Oh, nice shot, buddy.

Okay, I think we've torn up
the course long enough.

Last guy back
buys the first round.

* Yeah!

( giggling ):
Come on.

Let's go, come on!
Bring it!

( chuckles ):
Come on!

Step on it!

* Look at me now
Come on...

Oh, God!
* Just sitting here by myself

* And I think
you found someone else *

* Now I'm gonna have to find a
way to put the bottle down *

* And why

Whoo! Hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo!

* Can't you see

You better run!

* That I'm drowning

MARISSA:
Oh-ho!

* In a pool of misery?
Keep it tight, man!

* I'm always afraid
that you're gone *

( laughs )

* Away from me

* I'm always afraid
that you're... *

( screams )

Look out, look out!
Right, right!

Oh, oh,
stop, stop, stop!

Dude, nice driving.
You made that thing dance.

What the hell
is your problem, man?

Hey, man...

I thought... we thought
we were just joking.

Yeah, good joke. Come here,
tell me another one.

Whoa, sorry, man.

I'll see you back
at the house, okay?

( chuckles )

Are you okay?

You know,
he was just playing.

Fine.

That guy
was not playing.

Hey.
You look nice.

You look like you're not going
to have dinner with your father.

I'm gonna give them
a little one-on-one time.

Not a dinner
that I wanna be.

Feel the same way about my meal.
Jimmy's right, he's done here.

His best shot is starting
over somewhere else.

So, we'll have a nice meal
and a couple of drinks,

and talk about his next move.

Alcohol-- yes, inspired.

How do you think
I got you to marry me?

So, you were drunk.
Explains everything, Kiki.

Hey, Dad.

Caleb, it is always
such a pleasure.

You two have the time
of your lives, huh?

You're not dressed.
I'm not going.

We both know why Hailey's here.

She wants to catch up
with her family.

Dad, you honestly
don't believe that.

Don't be jealous of your baby
sister. I love you both equally.

You don't, but that's okay.
What's not okay is the fact

that she wants to take advantage
of how much you love her.

You want me to cut her off?
I know you do, too.

( sighing )

Oh, dinner at 6:00,
in bed by 8:00.

Anna, my old Jewish man
is very happy right now.

It's pretty humid, Seth. I think
you could stop futzing.

Oh, no, I can't. Futzing's
what I do, my darling.

And besides, I almost have it.
And there we go.

She's purring like a kitten.
Mmm.

( purring )

( laughing )

So, Cohen,
you and me alone in a bed.

( groaning )
Polyfill--it's not as comfortable as down,

but it's good for our little
allergies, sniffles.

And this bed, huh?

It's Posturepedic for my back

and your back.
( laughing )

Uh-oh...
Yeah?

My catheter fell out.

Hey, guys.

Hey.

Uh, Luke's hogging the remote,

and it's either football or
porn, so, I was wondering

if I could watch TV
with you guys?

We're not watching TV, Summer.
Yeah, we were about

to go to bed, actually.

But it's 8:00.
What're you, like, 70?

On the inside, yes.

Thought this was a weekend we
could all hang out as friends.

It is.
Totally, totally.

Oh, I get it.

Like, specific friend hours,
right? Whatever works for you.

A friend on/off switch, a friend
appointment book-- I mean,

do I have to schedule friend
time in advance? ...

No, that's not it.
That's not it.

Great. You guys,

that's great!

Hmm!

( music playing )

Ooh! That Enrique is so hot.

I mean, can you imagine being
with a guy with abs like that?

Huh, yeah, apparently not.

You don't have
to do that.

I don't mind.

Well, then at
least let me help.

Where's Marissa?

Getting changed
for the hot tub.

You going in?

Right.

Can, can we
just start over?

"Start over"?

Yeah, I feel like we got off

on the wrong foot,
and I want to make this right.

Get this thing straight,
so we can be friends.

What can I do?

Next time, you want to be
alone with my girlfriend,

let me know, so
I can stay home.

This always happens.

With Natalie, my friends
at Pacific, and now you.

I'm so stupid!

Take it easy.
Damn it!

Everybody who knows me
for more than five minutes

ends up hating my guts.

That's not true, nobody-nobody
hates your guts, okay?

What's going on?
We were talking.

Are you okay?

Yeah, I'm, I'm going
to go get some fresh air

and I'm going to go get
some stuff for breakfast.

I'll go with you.

No, just... you stay with Ryan.
I'll be back soon.

Just... just leave the kitchen,
man. Everything's okay.

You managed to drive him out
of his own house.

I don't know what happened. We
were talking, and he went off.

What were you talking about
that was so upsetting?

You.
Me.

You and him.

You know what? Oliver's got a
lot of problems,

but I think
you're the one who's paranoid.

What's
your problem?

Maybe, you spent the car ride
telling him everything about me.

I wasn't.
I was talking about my life.

And you're part of my life.
You know what?

I don't understand
what's going on with you.

There's got to be more I can do.
There's got to be somebody...

You've done everything you
possibly can, alright?

No, no, no, no...
You know what? You're right,

it's for the best.

Like you said, I can start over,
have a new life.

I never really wanted to be a
financial planner. Or a thief.

So, figure out right now, what's
it that you really wanna do?

What I really want to do

is not be 40 years old,
divorced, with two kids,

and trying to figure out
what I really want to do.

What's it you used to want to be?
A pilot.

I always liked stewardesses.

You?
I always knew exactly what I wanted to be.

Wanted to be left fielder
for New York Yankees.

Yes!
In fact, it was the pursuit of that dream

that carried me
through law school.

The most enjoyable job I ever
had, was, working here.

Yeah, I managed

this place, the summer
I married Julie,

and look at it now,
it's closing.

John Wayne
used to come here.

I know.
Gary Cooper.

Yeah.
This is the real deal, you know?

This is the last bit
of Old Newport. Look at it.

All it really needs
is just a little facelift.

The land value alone
would be enough

to secure
a decent renovation loan.

You update the menu a little
bit, you bring back happy hour.

It'd be...

It would be fun.
It would be a blast.

Kids would come in.
It'd be fantastic.

A lot more fun than, whatever
high-priced nuisance lawsuit

I got waiting for me
back at my desk.

Lot more fun than moving
to Phoenix without my kids.

What?

Katie?
Two more martinis, please.

Ooh, Egg McMuffins. That sounds
so good right now.

I know, why can't they
serve those all day?

I know-- totally. Like,
what technological

innovation is
preventing that?

They can put a man
on the moon, correct?

Right.
And they can't serve

Egg McMuffin past 10:30.
Can't figure it out.

It make no sense.
Doesn't make sense.

Cabbage Patch Kids.
Do they still sell those?

Oh, weird.

I don't really get the whole
legend of the cabbage patch.

It freaks me out.
What, babies harvested

from the heads of cabbage?

Yeah, exactly.
What's so freaky about that?

Some, like, child slavery ring.
It's weird.

It's disgusting,
makes me wanna vomit.

( gasping )

Smurfs, dude.
Aw...!

Do you know how tall they were?
What?

Three apples.

Really? That's kind of big.
Three apples. Yes.

There should be a channel
on television,

I think, of us watching
television.

We're that good.
Yeah.

Yeah, you are.
You are so that good.

Your whole witty banter thing
is so cute, you guys.

You guys are like brother
and sister.

Yeah, you guys
could totally be related.

I'm going to go to bed.

( door shuts )

I'm going to bed, too.
Well...

Uh...

Hey.

He's not back yet?

No, and he still hasn't called.

I'm really worried,
it's been two hours.

What's wrong with him, exactly?

He's been battling depression
for a while.

And he's had
some substance abuse problems.

I'm sorry.

I just hope he's okay.

( cell phone rings )
It's him.

Hey.

Marissa, something happened.

What's wrong?
What is it?

I messed up real bad.

Where are you?
What did you do?

Oh, I just drove back to Newport

and took a whole bunch of pills.

A whole bunch.

Okay, call
an ambulance.

No, no, no doctors.

Please, just...

I am so scared right now.
Maybe-maybe I can throw them up.

Do that. Get them out
of your system.

I'll try... but, uh...

do you think
you could, uh, come back?

I'm sorry, but I am so scared.

Okay, we're leaving right now.
See you soon.

He's not okay?
He just took a bunch of pills.

He's not picking up.

It's okay, you just
talked to him.

That was 20 minutes ago.

Hi. Marissa Cooper
for Oliver Trask, please?

* It's not unusual
to be loved by anyone *

( phone rings )

* It's not unusual
to have fun with anyone *

I thought you said he was okay?
He said he was.

He said he spent an hour getting
the pills out of his system,

but if that's true...

What?

Why isn't he picking up?

* It's not unusual
to see me cry *

* I wanna die

( ringing continues )

* It's not unusual
to go out at any time *

* But when I see you out
and about, it's such a crime *

* If you should ever want
to be loved by anyone *

* It's not unusual,
it happens every day *

( ringing continues )
* No matter what you say

( sighing, ringing continues )

What the hell did you say
to Dad?

I know you're behind this.

Hailey, we had a conversation,
and we both agreed...

How convenient that the one
thing you two agree on is how

to screw me over.

Oh, Hailey, you don't
have to do this.

This is what you wanted.
Me on my own.

Not taking Dad's money, not
staying in your house.

I never said
that you couldn't stay.

No.

You wanted me to live
my own life,

be on my own, be independent,
you went behind my back

and sabotaged my relationship
with Dad.

What relationship with Dad?

You take his money,
then you take off.

My relationship
with Dad is between me and Dad.

Was between me and Dad.

I just don't want to see you
get into any more trouble.

Well, now you won't have to.

( horn honking )

There's my cab.

Oh, Hailey,
where are you going to go?

You don't have any money.

Yeah, well, who's fault is that?
I'll find another way to get by.

( sighs )

You can stay here
and work for Dad.

Why? So I can be
as independent as you are?

Living off his money
in the McMansion he built you?

I'm sorry, but you were right.

I need to have my own life,

and the only way that I can do
that is to get far away from Dad

and as far away from you
as I can.

( horn honks )
I'll see you.

( sighs )

MARISSA: Oliver, open up. Please?
It's me.

We have to call security.
I'll go.

Oliver.

Oh my God, you're okay.

Yeah. Kind of.

Are you alright, man?
Yeah, a little embarrassed.

When you didn't pick up the
phone, I thought...

I was in the shower.

Sorry about that.

I got kind of messed up,
but I'm good now.

Yeah. Yeah.
You guys should go.

Enjoy what's left
of your weekend.

What are you talking about?
We're not going anywhere.

So, what did you take exactly?

Uh, I don't know.

A bunch of
sleeping pills,

some painkillers.

Well, how many?

I don't remember.

But I got them all
off my system.

I promise.

Well, did you drink any water,
you're probably dehydrated?

You know what?
We should call room service.

You want any ginger ale
or Gatorade?

Maybe, we should take him
to the emergency room.

I mean, he swallowed
all those pills.

If they were in my system,
I'd have felt them by now.

Yeah, but, why take any chances?
I mean, we can take you now.

The thing is,

if we go to the
emergency room,

they'll put me under suicide
watch for 72 hours.

They'll call the cops, and then,
they'll call my folks in Zurich.

I mean, the truth is,
is that I'm fine.

Really, I just want

to just crawl into my bed and
forget this day ever happened.

Sandy.

Hey, you're awake.

Oh, shoot.

Ow. I'm sorry,
I'm sorry.

Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow...
I'm sorry...

Oh!
Are you drunk?

Don't worry.
I took a cab.

Yeah, and so did Hailey.

Dad cut her off,
and she cut me off.

Oh, I'm sorry.
So how was your night?

Well, that good, huh?

Yeah, I'm not sure, but I...

Think Jimmy Cooper
and I might've gone

into business together tonight.
Really?

And what kind of business is that?
The restaurant business.

Oh, you are drunk.
Oh, in an adorable way, I think?

Yeah?

Oui? No?

And what about the firm?
Partridge, Savage, and Con?

Well, they'll have my body,
and so will you,

by the way.

But the restaurant will have
my soul

and my income

and my savings.

How can you do that?

I'm making more money
than I've ever made in my life,

I'm having way less fun, I used
to help people for a living.

You remember that.
Oh.

( laughs )

I'll tell you--
your funny Jimmy Cooper man--

oh, he needs some help, man,
if he doesn't get a job,

he's going to have
to leave town, and I...

I don't want him to leave town.
Well, you know,

it's been a long time since I've
had a friend in Newport.

God, I don't want to have to
find another friend in Newport.

Am I crazy?

Oh, I'm crazy.

You have to be crazy to be
in the restaurant business.

I think it's great
that you wanna help Jimmy...

Well, you know.

...and be friends after all this
time, it means a lot to me.

Yeah, well...

Sandy?

Oh.

( whispering ):
They're sleeping.

( sighs, honks horn )

Hmm.

SETH:
Hey, we're home.

( groans )

Thanks for the ride, buddy.
Mm-hmm.

Great weekend, huh?
Bye, Summer.

Bye.
LUKE: Goodnight.

Night. SETH:

See you guys. Have fun.
Drive safely.

So, you're into
Cohen, huh?

It must be kind of weird
to see him with somebody else.

It was for me,
anyway, with Marissa.

( scoffs )
Whatever.

I'm over it, moving on.

Ready for my next victim.

Well, just for the record,
whoever he turns out to be--

he's a lucky dude.

You're looking pretty hot
these days, Summer.

( laughs )

Real hot.

Thanks.

Oh, my God, ew.

Oh, God, I'm sorry, Luke.
You're cute and everything,

but there's just no way.

No worries.

What are you doing?
What are you looking for?

Nothing. Is he going
to be alright?

Uh, yeah, I think so, but I told
him I'd stay with him tonight.

What?

I can't leave him alone.
What if he tries it again?

If he tried it
the first time.

What?

What if he didn't try
and kill himself?

What're you talking about?
He wouldn't let us take him

to the hospital.

Maybe because he didn't want
to be shipped to an institution.

Maybe, he belongs there. I mean,
what kind of person does this?

No. I... I-I didn't mean...
You should go.

You weren't trying to
kill yourself, okay?

Yeah, well, maybe Oliver wasn't,
either, but he's my friend,

and I can't just
leave him alone tonight.

So you know what? Just go home,
and I'll see you in the morning.

OLIVER:
Sorry to interrupt. Um...

I just want to say thanks, Ryan,
for everything, man.

Sorry for ruining your weekend.

Goodnight.

( inhales )

I'll call you tomorrow.

* Now I sit here by myself

* Think you found
somebody else *

* How could you let them
take you away from me? *

* There's somebody else

by paulonline