The L.A. Complex (2012): Season 2, Episode 2 - Episode #2.2 - full transcript

Previously on
"The L.A. Complex":

I'm pregnant.

Are we living together?

Guess so.

Listen, we're putting
together a writing room

for a new late night talk show.

Hello, Sabrina.

Comedy writing is a blood sport.

You're trying to get in my head-

yeah, and it's working.

That should worry you.



We're gonna hire both of you...

You and Sabrina.

Are you his sister or his agent?

I'm whatever he needs me to be.

I do think he's great.

If you ever do find
yourself in L.A.

- Drop me a line.
- Thanks.

Oh my...

Did your agent explain
this character to you?

She's married to God.

You're a mess.

I know I am.
I'm tired of it.

Be my girlfriend.

- You don't even love me.
- I do love you.



Look at my face.

Just tell me what I need to do?

I never wanna see you again.

Do something...
do something...

Do something...

♪ it takes a thousand miles ♪

♪ To reach the stars tonight ♪

♪ And you will find your
dreams they come alive ♪

Simon.

Simon.

Simon.

Fine. I'll just enjoy
the view by myself.

♪ And you will find your
dreams they come alive ♪

♪ In the sun, when you're young ♪

♪ In the sun, when you're young ♪

♪ You find a way ♪

♪ In the sun, when you're young ♪

♪ In the sun, when you're young ♪

♪ You find a way ♪

♪ Back home ♪

If it's important,
he'll call back.

He has called back -
three times.

Hi, Ron.

The Saying Grace people are
just wondering where you are.

Um, I read for them
yesterday, Ron

Did I not call you last night?

No, you didn't.

- You got the part!
- What?!

You shoot today!

What time was my call?!

Half an hour ago.

You know, you're very cute
when you're frenzied.

Why can't I find my underwear?!

Because I've been
gradually throwing them out.

My plan is nearly complete.

Fine.
I'll go commando.

That's the plan.

I got a part.
I booked Saying Grace!

That's great!

Hey, that means we
both start work today!

I have to go, I'm late!

Okay.

Hey, have a wonderful first day.

I'll also have a good first day.

Thank you.

Ah, new girl, new job, new Nick.

Old Nick.

♪ The air is unbearably
harmful tonight ♪

- Oh God!
- Agghhhh!

Oh, did I burn you?!

Who cares!
Look at my shirt!

I don't have time to change!

Listen, actually,
I'm glad I saw you.

I wanted to apologize
for the other day

in your room...

This could be a look, right?

People walk around like
this all the time.

Yeah, I guess they could.

Okay, great.
Thanks.

Morning.

Hey, are you okay?

I'm not feeling so hot.

What is all that?

Sugar, right, with milk?

Cream? Soy milk?

What?

I couldn't remember
how you take your tea

so I just got you
four different options,

just to be safe.

I'm off caffeine.

Why?

I'm on a cleanse.

Oh. Perfect.

I did, however,
successfully manage

to bring you several
breakfast options.

What're you doing?
You're acting very strange.

Oh...

Okay, um...
Last night,

I obviously had a few drinks.

Last night,
you had all the drinks.

And I said a few things
about us...

As a...

Maybe I wouldn't have said

if I hadn't had all the drinks...

Relax. It's not like
you got drunk

and joined the marines.

I'm not gonna hold you to it.

Well, see,
that's just the thing.

Now that it's morning
and I'm sober-

- I get it.
- I don't feel any different.

I still wanna be
your boyfriend...

If you still want me to be.

I do.

Yeah.

Can you say that one more time?

Eat your breakfast.

I have to go.

What? Why?

I got a meeting
with Jennifer Bell.

Jennifer Bell?

Are you gonna be in a
Jennifer Bell movie now?

I hate you.

I hate me too.

Wait? What kind of
cleanse are you doing?

None of your business.

All right, so no pets,
no noise after eleven,

and no illegal activity, obviously.

You, short stuff,
you a bank robber?

Jewel thief?
You got any proof?

No jewels.

All right,
your story checks out.

Now, you can do rent
on a week-to-week

or you can do it monthly.

I saw your sign outside for...

For cleaning staff.

I was wondering if I could
trade my labour for a room?

Yeah, if we quintupled the amount
we pay our cleaning staff.

Oh!

Hey! Wait!
What're you doing?!

What're you doing?!

Fixing the wires.
What's the matter with you?

You might wanna turn
the breaker off first.

- Oh, geez.
- Simon...

Hand me those cutters.

Oh, I see what you mean
though, this is brutal.

Wrong grade of wire, no caps,

no grounds...

This is a total fire hazard.

That's one of the ones
I fixed already.

You need an electrician.

I kinda blew the budget already,

mostly on drywall.

They make it look
so easy on YouTube.

Where'd you learn
how to do this stuff?

Our dad's in construction.

Look, I fix this?
You give us a room.

How about this room?

- Deal.
- All right.

Good handshake.

Yours could use some work.

I bought you breakfast.

Why?

I thought we could
bury the hatchet.

Then you should've
brought a hatchet.

Look, I'm sorry you
think I stole your bit.

That is a terrible apology,

and you did steal my bit.

We were riffing!

I couldn't remember
who said what.

I say the funny things,
you say the stupid things.

What's to remember?

C'mon! You know that
I feel bad about this.

Look, we're the two baby
writers in the room.

It'll be better for both of us

if we're a united front.

You know it, and I know it.

What do you say?
Truce?

That depends.

Do you promise to stop
using words like "truce"?

You see this, this witty
repartee we have?

This is why we're
so good together.

We're like an old vaudeville duo.

Mm-hm.
Aren't I amazing?

You can't even see
my lips moving.

At least try the danish.

It's raisin.

You've never been in
a writers room before,

have you?

Are you kidding?

Writers room is to me
what ocean is to shark.

I'm gonna own this place.

Fine. Whatever.
Truce.

Look, Nick, danishes!

Hey, look who's awake.

How you feelin'?

What were you thinkin', man?

You scared me, man.

Whatever.

You're back now
and that's all that matters.

Hey, hey.
Everything's gonna be okay.

We gonna make this
like this never even happened,

all right?

Now listen to me,

the only other hoops
we gotta jump through

is this test the
doctor's gonna give you.

I leaned on the cat
that's gonna give you the test

and he gave me the down-low.

So all you gotta do

is everything they ask
you, just say "no."

What are these questions?

What'd I just say?

Doesn't matter what.
The answer's no.

'Sup, doc?

Would now be an okay time

to ask Mr. King
a few questions?

Yeah. Sure.
Pull up a chair.

Would you mind excusing us?

Yeah. Sure.

Got some calls to make, so...

I apologize for the bluntness
of some of these questions.

We need this psychiatric
evaluation on file

before we can legally
discharge you.

Okay.
Question one:

Do you continue
to have any thoughts

that you would
characterize as suicidal?

Yes.

If released,

can you imagine ever trying
to take your own life again?

Yes.

Do you have access
to lethal means?

Yes.

Are you distressed that

your attempt to end
your life failed?

Yes.

Hi, I'm Abby Vargas.
You're late.

Yes, I know, because my agent-

Donald wants to see you in his office.

Hi, Donald!

I'm here.
You wanted to see me?

Oh! Whoa! Yeah.
I didn't mean to uh...

Catch you in the middle
of changing, or-?

Oh, no, this is a top.
It's from American Apparel.

They call it the bra top.

Yes.

Well, as star, director,
and executive-producer,

I like to meet all our guests

and make sure
they're comfortable.

Thank God!
I thought I was in trouble.

Yeah, you auditioned
for the role of Maria,

the student missionary,

but around here
I think we all believe

you'd be better suited for Veronica,
the promiscuous new girl.

Well, it's nice of you to think of me.

This is a family show,
family values.

Our fans would tolerate nothing less.

I thought christians were
supposed to be tolerant.

This is our standard
morality clause,

which stipulates that,
while under contract,

your behavior will be in
strict adherence

to the show's core values.

Right. Absolutely.

And that not only will you be
vigilant with yourself,

but also your co-workers.

You'll report any infractions.

Like narc on people?

I prefer to see it
as the buddy system.

Your arc is two episodes
at the moment.

It could be less,
it could be more.

It all depends on how you fit.

You think you'll be
a good fit, Abby?

I think I'm gonna be
a perfect fit.

That is great, that is great.

Sabrina is on fire!

Okay. Anybody else have
anything along that vein?

Anyone? Not all at once.
Nobody?

Okay, let's take a break.

I love this.

I mean, everyone's just collaborating,

and spitballing, and
then you with the-

you need to say something.

- What? I've said stuff, haven't I?
- No!

Laughing and listening sounds
is not contributing.

You say you're a shark.
Well, sharks need to swim,

or they will not be
asked back next season.

Well, people need to be listened to.

And besides,
I'm just figuring out

the feel of the room, you know,

waiting for the right moment.

The right moment is always now.

Nick, stop it!
Nobody eats danishes.

Danishes make you look stupid.

You make me feel stupid;
that's not helpful.

Fine.

Talk to me, goose.

I have a straight offer for you.

No!

For Cactibear 2.

Ugh. No.

It's a movie.

It's a tv movie about
a half-bear/half-cactus

who kills base jumpers.

Fine.

I also got you in to
read for that feature

you've been bugging me about.
"Falling Parallel."

For the lead?

No, the snarky sister.

Well, no, I'm perfect for the lead.

Well, they don't see you that way.

See me what way?

You know... nice,
relatable, warm.

Hey, I am plenty warm!

Not according to the casting
directors I've talked to.

I know a guy
who teaches a class...

You did not just say that to me.

It's not about acting.

We all know you can act.

It's about learning

how you're perceived and using it.

Well, it sounds stupid.

He has a class this afternoon,
and I said you'd stop by.

Look, you can bitch to me

or you can do something about it,

but we're running out
of casting directors.

♪ All my kin are spinning tops ♪

♪ Bearing wounds and aftershock ♪

♪ I don't know what I'm doing here ♪

Thank you.

Hey.

Ditching me already?

Oh... hi!

Uh, no, I'm sorry,

I thought maybe there'd
been some sort of mix-up.

Well, I'm fifteen minutes late.

Do you give up that easy?

Uh...

Uh, I'm here now.

Do you wanna do this, or...?

Yes! Absolutely.

So my agent said that
you wanted to meet?

Yeah. Well, I'm meeting
with a few people,

trying to find the right fit.

I'm Jen, by the way.

Uh, Connor.
Sorry.

So tell me about this movie.

Now, who said anything
about a movie?

Oh, I must've misunderstood.

If you don't wanna talk
about the project,

then I don't know why I'm here.

Well, buy me a smoothie
and maybe you'll find out.

Hey!

Hi!
Simon, stand up.

What uh...
What are you doing here?

Uh, well, you said
if we were ever in town,

that we should look you up,
and... And here we are!

Uh... great. Yeah.

You said Simon could
do well down here.

Absolutely.
No, I mean...

We're not casting right now,

but just leave your agent's
information, right?

He doesn't have an agent.

Well, he should get one.

Right.

I sort of thought you could
maybe help us with that.

Right! You...
Okay, hang on. Um...

Okay. Yeah.

I think these guys are great...
Maybe.

Uh, okay.

Is there someone specific
I should ask for, or...?

Yeah, yeah.
I mean...

Uh, yup, that number
right there.

Just contact them.

I'm sure they'll put you in
touch with the right person.

Should I give them your name?

Sure. Okay.
I mean, you can, yeah.

Look, you gave me your card,

you said that you would help
us if we ever came down.

Well, we're down,

so are you gonna help us or not?

I gave you my card
because I was hitting on you.

I'm eighteen.

Yeah, I don't really have-

look, I'm not in a position
to help you.

I'm sorry.

Go get 'em, bud.

He's not gonna help us?

I think he just did.

Lord Jesus Christ,
please watch over us

as we try to make our
humble show in your name.

Amen.

Amen.

Knock 'em dead, sis.
You've got this.

You too, bro.

Thank you.

All right, people,
let's go save some souls!

Woo!

Saving souls...
Love doing that.

Amen.

Come with me for a sec, hon.

Did you change your wardrobe?

No. Well, I have
my own bra on,

because the other one
was kinda grandma-ish.

Yeah, Donald has
a problem with your look.

He just signed off on
this fifteen minutes ago.

Yeah, well, apparently
it was warmer then, so...

I'm sorry, I don't...

They're for your nipples.

You can see your nipples
through your top.

Yeah, Donald doesn't
like nipples.

Oh my God.

Donald also doesn't like when you
take the Lord's name in vain.

Don't worry,
I gotta wear 'em too.

My nipples get crazy hard.

I'm Brandon, by the way.
I play grace's brother.

I'm Abby.
I play the slut.

Nice.

Anyone have a twenty on Brandon?

- Ahem.
- Okay.

Come find me later,
I'll show you around.

We're not as crazy as we seem.

Well, Donald is.
He's insane.

You should...
Yes.

Tell me a secret.

A secret?

Yeah.
Breeds familiarity.

Cuts past all the boring stuff.

I burned my house down two days ago.

On purpose or by accident?

Uh, the show sent me
a photograph of my face,

some promo shot...

Yeah, those things are awful.

I felt like burning it.

The rest sort of...
kinda progressed from there.

Wait, you're serious.

Wow!
That's a good secret.

Okay. You're turn.

Me? No. Um...

I don't know...

Plastic surgery?

No?

I don't really think I can
compete with house-burning.

Come on.
Okay, what scares you?

Disappearing.

That's a cop-out.

Everyone's scared
of disappearing.

Thanks for seeing us so quick.

I always have time
for a possible client.

Simon's a good kid.

He's respectful, he listens...

He's a hard worker.

You know what?
I'm gonna stop you.

I see a lot of kids.

Right, but this
director said that-

And I've gotten
pretty good at seeing

who has the potential to
work and who doesn't...

And I think Simon can work.

So if you two are amenable,

I'd like to sign him
to a six month contract.

- For real?!
- Damn right we're amenable!

Sorry, uh, what's this section
here, the "start-up" package?

Yeah. That's standard.

That's everything we need
to get Simon up and running.

Headshots, acting classes...

Simon, stop!
Admin charges...

I teach the
classes twice a week,

and we have our own
in-house photographer.

This says $1200 dollars.

Our rates are very competitive.
Is that gonna be a problem?

No.

No problem.

Okay.

Fine.
Tell me about the movie.

It's a love story.

Between me and you?

Between me and someone.

It could be you,
it could be Ryan Gosling.

The jury's still out.

I've never done a movie before.

I know.

You've never done much
of anything before.

And yet, you're the star
of your own tv series.

How does that happen?

I don't know.

Can I try something?

Sure.

I'm-I'm sorry.
All right, let's do this.

- Do what?
- Come on.

Brandon?

Yes!

Is now a good time to-

Get out!
Get out!

I'm sorry!
I'm sorry!

Kaldrick, you
wanna share anything?

Share?

Yeah. Tell us something;
it's what group is for.

No, thank you.

Hey, there's no judgment here.

Don't touch me, man!

What the hell is wrong with you?

- I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
- Okay, okay.

You don't like being touched.
Now we all know that.

Please, have a seat.

Okay.
John, you wanna share today?

Yeah, sure

I just, you know,
I wanna line up

a bunch of good days, you know?

Like a whole week in a row.

Yo, you got a problem?

What the hell you lookin' at?

Kaldrick! Kaldrick!

What the hell you lookin' at?

Kaldrick!
This don't concern you.

And it doesn't concern him,
either, okay?

He just stands there,
day in and day out,

staring at that same spot on the wall.

You're in his spot, okay?

Look at him.
They call him the abyss.

He's harmless.

He hasn't spoken in years.

Can we continue?

Okay, John, sorry,
you were saying?

I just, you know,

I just wanna line up
a bunch of good days.

You know?
Like a whole week in a row.

Hey, how's
the typing pool shaping up?

Well, judging by your
subtle body language

and the continued presence
of this young man,

I'm gonna say not so good.

Hey, Paul, good to see you again.

What are we
working on, hive-mind?

Trying to find a way
to end the first episode

that sets us "apart."

Ugh!
Why don't we try "be good"?

I was hoping for something
a little more specific.

Oh, uh, whaaaat about...

Okay, this is probably stupid, but...

What if the very last thing we do is,

Paul says to the audience,
"good audience-"

you're being me now?

- Yeah.
- Careful...

Okay.

Uh, "good audience",

before we send you back out
into that cold, lonely world,

we'd like to make sure
that each and every one of you

"gets a hug."

And then you...
You hug the audience.

Yeah, and not just Paul,

like the entire staff comes out

and hugs each member
of the audience,

while you sing "Danny boy"
or something.

It is stupid, isn't it?

It's not great.

How about this, weirdly
enough I don't hate it!

I kinda hate the person
who said it-

why do you hate me?

But I don't hate "it."

Somewhere underneath
the sheer thoughtlessness,

the borderline stupid naivete,

it almost touches on something

that's really
kind of brilliant...

Even by accident.

So nice work, Rick.

Nick.

And Mrs. Rick.

Okay, guys, fisherman sketch,
let's finish that one.

Hi! Have a seat, Connor.

This is a confidentiality agreement.

What's the film?

Sign it and we'll tell you.

- What's the film?
- There is no film.

Okay. Well, I can't do
another tv series-

it's not a series either.

What, do you want me
to do theater?

I want you to go out with me.

- You what?-?
- I wanna hire you to be my boyfriend.

You wanna hire me
to be your boyfriend?

For six months.

With an option for six more.

This is...

A serious offer,

which you should seriously consider.

Why?

Do I really have to explain?

Yeah.
Yeah, you do.

How old do you think I am?

- I don't know-
- Don't answer that.

It turns out 18-year-old kids
don't know who I am anymore.

If I don't do something drastic,

I'm gonna fall down
a very deep hole

that most actresses in this
town never climb out of.

I walk down the street with
you, I stop disappearing.

You make me relevant.

What do you make me,
aside from a prostitute?

I make you a movie star.

And this isn't about sex.

You spend six months with me,

you'll be on the cover of every
trashy magazine in the world.

You'll be famous enough
to headline your own films.

People really do this?

All the time.

- You lied to me.
- No.

I thought that we were having a
real conversation back there.

We were; that's why you're here.

And you're upset.

Yeah, I'm upset.

That's okay.

While you're upset, think about it.

Don't forget about your
confidentiality agreement.

Don't worry,

this meeting was twice
as humiliating for me

as it was for you.

What else do we see?
Who is this girl?

She's sexy.
I'd buy her as a spy.

Yes.
I also see a defense attorney.

Young doctor maybe.
What else?

Porn star.

Porn star?
Okay. What else?

We trust her?

Yes, that's
exactly it, we trust her,

and that is money in the bank.

All right, let's give our
sexy spy-doctor a hand.

So those are you archetypes -
learn them, own them.

Casting directors
will love you for it.

Okay, new girl, you're up.

So who's this woman?

She could
definitely play a bitch.

Okay, you know what-

Whoa, whoa, whoa! Relax.

This isn't about judgment
or who you are.

This is just what people see.

So what else?
What do we see?

Anger.

Tough.

She's scary.

Yes!

I also see a corrupt senator
in there...

- Coroner, maybe...
- What else?

Calculating, jaded...

Guarded, cynical, cold.

What the hell do you know?
If you're so smart,

how come I've never
seen you in anything?

Okay, let's just
try to stay open and receptive to-

This room has the collective
insight of a fortune cookie.

You want to know what
my archetype is?

Working actress.

That's what people see
when I walk into a room.

Class.

You know I can't tell anyone

anything you say in here, right?

No matter how famous you
are, it's confidential.

I'm not allowed to say anything-

I know what confidential means.

Okay.

So why are you here?

Didn't have a choice, did I?

Look, you don't wanna talk to me,

that's fine.

But you need to talk to someone.

Otherwise, whatever drove you
in here, it's gonna kill you.

It almost did already, right?

Just say it out loud.
It'll help.

Are we done?

Raquel Westbrook?

Nope.
Guess she's a no-show.

I'm here.

Raquel? Hi!

You look...
I've never...

Are you reading
for the role of Doris?

Actually, I was hoping
to read for Heather

if that's all right with you guys.

Sure.

I do my speech,
talk, talk, talk...

Brandon - then you noogie
your sister,

I exit, then...

"Must be nice having
a big brother."

"Nope. It's the best."

Just like that.

All right, I need twenty
minutes to light,

- and one minute with you, Brandon.
- Yeah.

Abby, can I ask you something
about that scene super-quick?

Sure.

I will murder you,
do you understand me?

If you tell Donald

or anybody else about Brandon and me,

I will slit your throat.

Got it?

Yeah, yeah.
I get it.

Good.

Hey! Hey, hey, hey, hey!

Hey! Um... so...

Me and Laura
and some other people

are going out later -

- Why don't you come with us?
- No, no.

I don't think Laura really-

She's fine.
Come out with us.

- No. No.
- You should come out with us.

- No.
- You should come out with us.

Okay.

Okay.

What?

Just admit it, we make a good team.

Yeah. Kinda like a
horse and a jockey.

Exactly.

You're the short one,

so you know that makes
you the jockey, right?

Are you fighting
to be the horse?

The strong one?

The actual winner of the race?

Wha?
What are you doing?

I'm kissing you.

You just said
we made a good team,

so I thought we could try
another sport.

No, sorry, I'm...
I'm with Abby.

Abby. Really?

Yeah.
We're living together.

Nick, Sabrina, I am
glad I caught you guys.

Hey, listen,

there's been a bit of confusion
with your deals.

In what sense?

In the sense
that you don't have any yet.

Grrr. Yeah, production
can't afford both of you,

so I'm just gonna
try you both out

and whoever's not funny enough,

I'll just fire.
Yeah.

Kind of sad when I say it out loud.

Anyways, have a good night.

Yeah.
Great night.

- The truce is off, isn't it?
- Yeah.

You are a dead man, Wagner.

Bye, Dawn!
Have a good night.

Bye, Dawn!

You sure you can't stay for one more?

Actually, I should
probably go with her

because I have
an early call time-

Yeah, so do we.
You should stay.

- We need to talk.
- Talk about what?

I don't know what
you're talking about.

Because I didn't see anything

because there's nothing to see,

and also, I'm not a rat so...

Here's the thing.

We've been doing this
show for six years-

Playing Christian America's
favourite brother and sister.

Only somewhere in year three
we accidentally fell in love-

No, somewhere in
the first read-through

we accidentally fell in love.

Somewhere in year three

we got the balls to do
something about it.

Pretty much.

Does anybody know?

My mom,

gay Patrick in makeup, and you.

Patrick is gay?!

I know this seems
a little bit extreme,

but you need to understand,
Donald-

is a psychopath.

If he finds out

the Donovan twins are
banging each other...

We're done.

Okay? We're done.

So...

How are you at keeping secrets?

My lips are sealed.

Shake on it?

Yes.

Oh, hey...

Uh, sorry.

I don't know if you're
picking up these messages

or not, but um...

We're actually down in L.A. now.

It's a long story,

but Simon's kinda trying
to be an actor now,

and he's actually not bad.

Um, but the thing is...

We need twelve hundred dollars
to get him started and...

I don't know if you've found
a job out there yet or not,

but um...

But I could really use
your help, dad.

So, um, bye.

Yeah, the wiring's pretty bad
back there.

Simon?

Simon!

Simon!

Simon, what are you doing?

Simon, get away from them!

What the hell do you
think you're doing?

Sorry, we didn't-

We're just making a
short film about the Lux,

and asking Simon
what he thought of it so far.

You told a stranger your name?

No. You were just
screaming it a bunch.

This is Dita, Kevin, and Cam.
They make movies!

Cam says they can do
my headshot for free!

They're gonna help us, Beth.

They did mine.
They're really good.

I mean, only if you want us to.

Sorry.

Did you hear anything back yet?

They passed.

What? No!

I was charming, I was warm,

I was sexy, I was nice, I-

They passed, Raquel.

They said your read
came across as cold.

But they love the new hair.

Great.

Well, then what about
the other part?

The bitchy sister.

They cast it.

What about Cactibear?

We passed on that, remember?

Well, can we unpass?

Are you-Just do it.

How was your day?

I don't wanna talk about it.

How was your day?

I can't talk about it.

Hello?

Abby?

Is that mortal combat?

Are you actually at an arcade?

I can't hear you,
I'm at an arcade!

I'm just having a drink
with some of the cast!

Well, I'm glad you had
a good first day.

Uh, I... I can't hear you.

Can we talk later?

I can't talk later.

I have to be up early,
so I have to go to bed now.

Can we... can we...
Can we talk for a minute?

Great! I'll be home in a bit!

I just really need these
people to like me,

and trust me.

Can you go outside or something?

I'd really like to talk to you.

Okay, bye!

Abby, come on!

Turned down my first gig
as a male escort

and now I just broke

my first confidentiality
agreement, so...

Don't tell anyone
because I will get sued.

I think you should do it.

I'm serious.

- No, you're not.
- Yeah, I am.

It's an opportunity, and those
don't come along very often.

They certainly don't
for me anymore.

What about...
this morning?

This morning was this morning,

and tonight is tonight,

and we've both had
a helluva day in between.

So you didn't really mean
what you said then

about wanting to...
To be with me?

Hey, hey, hey!

Of course I wanna be with you.

- Then why are you-?
- Look, I don't like it.

But it's six months

that could change
your life forever.

Look, there are worse roles.

Cactibear 2, for instance.

You tell me who the whore is.

Well, I think, technically,

when you get to your level

you're considered a call girl.

You really think that
I should do this?

It's the smart move.

Jennifer bell can have the fake you.

I get the real one.

Your eyelashes,
they're... they're fake.

- And these?
- Padded.

I have new nails too.
You like 'em?

They're really good.

Yeah.

We should lose this.

We can't stay, Simon.

Why?

It was a mistake;

we shouldn't have come down
here in the first place.

But we need the money!

It's gonna cost us more
than you could ever make.

Beth, please, I can do this.

I want to stay.

All right, here's the deal:

You don't leave my sight.
Ever.

It was just Kevin
and Cam and Dita.

They're nice.

Yeah, everyone's nice
until they're not.

You pull that again,
and we're gone.

Two, this place,
it doesn't change us.

If I get a whiff that it is,
then we're outta here.

And three, if I get a bad feeling
about anything, we walk.

And if you get a bad feeling
about anything, we walk.

- Okay?
- Deal.

Does that mean we're staying?

For now.

But if you start sending me out

for double-foam lattes
or something,

then we're outta here.

What's a double-foam latte?

Exactly.

Love you, buddy.

What you doin', man?

You ain't supposed to be in here.

Neither are you.
Single dropped.

What?

"Hard times."

Radio's all over it.
It got leaked.

I can't leave.

I'm here now

until the doctors
say I'm better.

That's it, it's done.

Naw, man, I took care of it.

You're good to go.

Ain't nothin' that's done
that I can't undo for you.

All right?

Right.

Here. Get dressed.

Let's get outta here, this
place gives me the creeps.

Come on, man, let's go.

I'll meet you outside.

Give me two seconds.

Go!

I'm a faggot.