The Jeffersons (1975–1985): Season 1, Episode 8 - Mother Jefferson's Boyfriend - full transcript

♪ WELL, WE'RE MOVIN' ON UP ♪
♪ MOVIN' ON UP ♪

♪ TO THE EAST SIDE ♪
♪ MOVIN' ON UP ♪

♪ TO A DELUXE
APARTMENT IN THE SKY ♪

♪ MOVIN' ON UP ♪
♪ MOVIN' ON UP ♪

♪ TO THE EAST SIDE ♪
♪ MOVIN' ON UP ♪

♪ WE FINALLY GOT
A PIECE OF THE PIE ♪

♪ FISH DON'T FRY
IN THE KITCHEN ♪

♪ BEANS DON'T
BURN ON THE GRILL ♪

♪ TOOK A WHOLE LOT OF TRYIN' ♪

♪ JUST TO GET UP THAT HILL ♪

♪ NOW WE'RE UP IN
THE BIG LEAGUES ♪



♪ GETTIN' OUR TURN AT BAT ♪

♪ AS LONG AS WE LIVE
IT'S YOU AND ME, BABY ♪

♪ AIN'T NOTHIN'
WRONG WITH THAT ♪

♪ WELL, WE'RE MOVIN' ON UP ♪
♪ MOVIN' ON UP ♪

♪ TO THE EAST SIDE ♪
♪ MOVIN' ON UP ♪

♪ TO A DELUXE
APARTMENT IN THE SKY ♪

♪ MOVIN' ON UP ♪
♪ MOVIN' ON UP ♪

♪ TO THE EAST SIDE ♪
♪ MOVIN' ON UP ♪

♪ WE FINALLY GOT A
PIECE OF THE PIE ♪♪

MMM? MMM-MMM!

THAT'S SOME KIND
OF BIRTHDAY CAKE.

MOTHER JEFFERSON OUGHT TO
LOVE IT. I GUARANTEE SHE'LL LOVE IT.

THIS IS A RUM CAKE, AND I
DOUBLED UP ON THE RUM.

IS THE WHOLE FAMILY
COMING TONIGHT?



NO, JUST MOTHER
JEFFERSON. WE SAVE OUR BIG

GET-TOGETHERS FOR
THANKSGIVING AND CHRISTMAS.

THAT'S NICE. I'M
AFRAID TOM AND I...

GAVE UP ON FAMILY
THANKSGIVINGS YEARS AGO.

YEAH? WHY? WHEN HIS
WHITE PARENTS MET MY FOLKS,

NEITHER SIDE THOUGHT THERE
WAS MUCH TO BE THANKFUL FOR.

WELL, DON'T YOU EVEN GET
TOGETHER ON CHRISTMAS?

OH, YEAH, BUT BY
MUTUAL AGREEMENT,

THE PARTY'S ALWAYS HELD
SOMEPLACE IN NO MAN'S LAND.

WHERE'S THAT? THE
NEAREST HOWARD JOHNSON'S.

IN THAT WAY, YOU GET 28
FLAVORS OF ICE CREAM...

AND TWO FLAVORS OF FAMILY.

YOU KNOW, I'VE GONE OUT OF MY
WAY TO BE NICE TO MY MOTHER-IN-LAW,

BUT NOTHING SEEMS TO PLEASE HER.

HONEY, JOIN THE CLUB.

FOR INSTANCE, TWO YEARS AGO FOR CHRISTMAS,
I BOUGHT HER A BEAUTIFUL CLAM STEAMER.

SHE HATED IT. WELL, MAYBE YOU SHOULD
GET HER SOMETHING MORE PERSONAL.

I TRIED THAT. LAST
YEAR, I BOUGHT HER...

A GORGEOUS POWDER-BLUE CASHMERE
SWEATER WITH A SHAWL COLLAR.

OH, SHE MUST'VE LOVED THAT.

SHE KEEPS IT IN
THE CLAM STEAMER.

UH-OH. I FORGOT TO BUY CANDLES.

OH, NO PROBLEM. I'VE GOT
PLENTY OF THEM UPSTAIRS.

I'LL GET THEM. OH, WELL, HELEN.

HELEN, WAIT, WAIT. I FORGOT TO TELL
YOU THE MOST EXCITING NEWS OF ALL.

YOU'RE PREGNANT.

BITE YOUR TONGUE.
THEN WHAT IS IT?

MOTHER JEFFERSON'S FOUND
HERSELF A BOYFRIEND. NO, GIRL!

YES! AND WHAT'S MORE,
HE'S ASKED HER TO MARRY HIM,

AND THEY'RE THINKING
OF MOVING TO FLORIDA.

THAT'S WONDERFUL. THIS
CERTAINLY TEACHES ME A LESSON.

I KNOW. YOU NEVER REALIZE HOW MUCH YOU
LOVE SOMEBODY UNTIL YOU'RE GONNA LOSE 'EM.

NO. WHAT I MEANT WAS, SOMETHING GOOD HAS
HAPPENED SINCE PRESIDENT FORD TOOK OVER.

HOW MANY CANDLES DO YOU NEED?

ONE. IF WE LIT A
CANDLE FOR EVERY YEAR,

THAT CAKE WOULD BE
THE TOWERING INFERNO.

AHH!

HI, MR. BENTLEY. HOW
DO YOU DO, MRS. WILLIS?

[Doorbell Rings]

COMING!

HELLO, MRS. JEFFERSON.

OH, HELLO. IS YOUR
BACK OUT AGAIN?

WELL, IN A MANNER OF SPEAKING.

I WONDER IF YOU COULD DO
ME A FAVOR. SURE. COME ON IN.

I DON'T THINK I SHOULD. YOU
SEE, I'VE GOT THIS PROBLEM.

WELL, COME IN AND
TELL ME ABOUT IT.

WELL, I THINK PERHAPS I SHOULD
TELL YOU WHAT THE PROBLEM IS FIRST.

UH, MR. BENTLEY, I'D APPRECIATE IF
YOU WOULD STOP PLAYING PEEKABOO...

AND COME IN. VERY
WELL, IF YOU SAY SO.

AAH! MR. BENTLEY!

THAT'S THE PROBLEM. YOU
SEE, I'VE LOCKED MYSELF OUT.

NOW, COULD YOU CALL
THE MANAGER AND ASK HIM...

TO SEND SOMEONE UP
WITH A PASSKEY? CERTAINLY.

SEE, I'D BEEN IN ALL DAY, AND
I WAS DRESSING TO GO OUT...

WHEN I SUDDENLY REALIZED I HADN'T
GOTTEN MY MORNING NEWSPAPER YET,

SO I STEPPED OUT INTO THE
HALLWAY... UH, MR. McGOWAN?

THIS IS MRS. JEFFERSON.

WILL YOU PLEASE SEND SOMEONE UP TO
MY APARTMENT WITH A PASSKEY? QUICK.

THANK YOU. WHEN MRS. WILLIS SAID
HELLO, I DIDN'T WANT TO BE RUDE TO HER.

SOMEONE IS COMING RIGHT UP.
OH, THANK YOU, MRS. JEFFERSON.

I CAN'T TELL YOU HOW
HAPPY THIS MAKES ME.

MR. BENTLEY, CAN I GET
YOU A ROBE OR SOMETHIN'?

OH, NO. I'M QUITE
WARM. THANK YOU.

HI, WEEZ.

OH, MY GOD.

WAIT TILL YOU SEE WHAT I
GOT HERE. HEY, BENTLEY.

A BIRTHDAY PRESENT FOR MAMA.

WELL, WHAT DO YOU THINK?

AIN'T IT BEAUTIFUL? IT'S LOVELY.

OH, YES. MY, IT'S ABSOLUTELY
EXQUISITE. YOU GOT GOOD TASTE, BENTLEY.

WELL, I GOTTA GO CHANGE.
MOM WILL BE HERE IN A MINUTE.

[Doorbell Rings] OH, THAT
MUST BE THE KEY. I'LL GET IT.

OH, NO, DON'T!

GOOD EVENING, RALPH. SIR, I
GOT HERE AS QUICKLY AS I COULD.

MAYBE TOO QUICK?

RALPH, IT'S VERY SIMPLE.

MR. BENTLEY JUST LOCKED
HIMSELF OUT OF HIS APARTMENT.

IF YOU SAY SO. YES, YOU SEE, I
WAS REACHING FOR MY NEWSPAPER...

WHEN THE WIND BLEW MY DOOR SHUT.

SOUNDS GOOD TO ME.

RALPH, IF YOU'RE THINKING... I'M
NOT THINKING, MRS. JEFFERSON, MA'AM.

I NEVER THINK. NOT
WHILE I'M ON THE JOB.

I JUST GIVE SERVICE
WITH A SMILE.

IF YOU WOULD BE KIND ENOUGH NOW
TO UNLOCK MY DOOR... CERTAINLY, SIR.

MR. BENTLEY, AREN'T YOU
FORGETTING SOMETHING?

HMM? OH, YES.

THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR ALL
YOUR KINDNESS. YOU'RE WELCOME.

WEEZY... HOLD IT, GEORGE.

DIDN'T YOU THINK THERE WAS
SOMETHING STRANGE ABOUT MR. BENTLEY?

ANYBODY WHO DON'T THINK
THERE'S SOMETHING STRANGE

ABOUT BENTLEY JUST
AIN'T PAYIN' ATTENTION.

THAT IS ONE WEIRD DUDE.

I GOT A FAVOR TO ASK
OF YOU. WHAT IS IT?

WELL, IT'S ABOUT MAMA. I KNOW YOU
THINK SHE COMPLAINS ALL THE TIME.

NO, NOT ALL THE TIME.
ONLY WHEN SHE'S AWAKE.

WEEZY, IT'S HER BIRTHDAY. I WANT
YOU TO BE EXTRA NICE TO HER, OKAY?

I WANT EVERYTHING
TO BE JUST RIGHT.

WELL, SO DO I, GEORGE. I DON'T WANT
ANYTHING TO SPOIL HER GOOD NEWS.

WHAT GOOD NEWS?

OH, I PROMISED YOUR MOTHER I WOULDN'T
TELL. SHE WANTS TO TELL YOU HERSELF.

COME ON, YOU CAN TELL
ME. NOPE. I PROMISED.

WEEZY, EITHER YOU
TELL ME THE GOOD NEWS...

OR I ASK WHAT BENTLEY WAS
DOING HERE WITH NO PANTS.

YOU NOTICED? SURE.

WELL, WHY DIDN'T
YOU SAY SOMETHING?

'CAUSE HE'S ENGLISH. WHAT
DOES THAT GOTTA DO WITH IT?

'CAUSE THEM PEOPLE ARE
ALWAYS DRESSIN' FUNNY.

AIN'T YOU EVER SEEN 'EM WALKIN' DOWN THE
STREET, WEARIN' THEM FUNNY-LOOKIN' SKIRTS?

THAT'S THE SCOTCH.

NO, IT AIN'T. THEY DO THAT
EVEN WHEN THEY AIN'T DRINKING.

[Doorbell Rings]

MAMA, HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

HELLO, SON.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY,
MOTHER JEFFERSON.

THANK YOU, LOUISE.

AREN'T YOU GONNA GET
DRESSED FOR MY PARTY?

I AM DRESSED.

OH.

OH, YOU ARE SUCH A GREAT KIDDER.

GEORGE, DON'T JUST STAND THERE.
HELP YOUR MOTHER OFF WITH HER CAPE.

OH, MOTHER JEFFERSON, I
LOVE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING.

THANK YOU, LOUISE. YOU ALWAYS
DID HAVE SUCH MARVELOUS TASTE.

LOUISE, YOU'RE JUST TRYING TO
MAKE A MIDDLE-AGED LADY FEEL GOOD.

OH, NO! I'VE NEVER SEEN YOU LOOK
MORE ATTRACTIVE. AS A MATTER OF FACT...

WELL, MAMA... HUSH, GEORGE!

DON'T INTERRUPT LOUISE.
WHAT WERE YOU SAYING, DEAR?

I HOPE THIS WILL BE THE HAPPIEST
BIRTHDAY YOU'VE EVER HAD.

THAT'S SO SWEET.

LOUISE, YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO
BE NICE. LET'S NOT GET SICKENING.

I'VE GOT SOMETHING TO SAY.
YOU DIDN'T TELL HIM, DID YOU?

OH, YOU KNOW ME, MOTHER
JEFFERSON. YEAH, THAT'S WHY I ASKED.

WELL, GEORGE,
ABOUT TWO WEEKS AGO,

I MET THE NICEST MAN
NAMED HERBERT RUSSELL.

HEY, THAT'S COOL, MA. UH-HUH. AND
WE'VE BEEN SEEING A LOT OF EACH OTHER.

WE'VE GONE TO CHURCH,
WE PLAYED BINGO,

AND WE EVEN TOOK A RIDE ON THE
STATEN ISLAND FERRY. OH, THAT'S GREAT.

I ALWAYS SAID YOU WAS A FOX.

WE HAVE SO MUCH FUN TOGETHER.

UH, HE DIDN'T TRY TO GET
FRESH WITH YOU, HAS HE?

[Laughs] JUST KIDDING.

HE'S A PERFECT GENTLEMAN.

AND HE'S ASKED ME TO
MARRY HIM. SAY WHAT?

AND, GEORGE, HERBERT WANTS YOUR
MOTHER TO MOVE TO FLORIDA WITH HIM.

ISN'T THAT GREAT? NO, IT AIN'T!

WHAT DO YOU REALLY KNOW
ABOUT THIS GUY ANYWAY?

WELL, HE HAS A WONDERFUL
SENSE OF HUMOR.

SO DOES RODNEY ALLEN RIPPY. I
WOULDN'T WANT YOU TO MARRY HIM.

SHE COULD DO WORSE.
THIS AIN'T FUNNY, WEEZY.

WE ARE TALKING ABOUT A DUDE THAT
SHE'S ONLY KNOWN FOR TWO WEEKS,

AND THAT'S WAY TOO SOON TO BE
TALKIN' ABOUT SOMEBODY'S MARRIAGE.

YOUR MOTHER IS OLD ENOUGH
TO KNOW WHAT'S BEST FOR HER.

I'M OLD ENOUGH TO KNOW
WHAT'S BEST FOR EVERYBODY.

- YOU DON'T NEED AN OLD MAN
HANGIN' AROUND THE HOUSE.
- HE'S NOT OLD.

HE'S A YOUNG MAN ABOUT MY AGE.

DOES HE KNOW ABOUT ME? OH,
YES. I'VE TOLD HIM ALL ABOUT YOU.

THEN THERE'S YOUR ANSWER.
THAT GUY'S OUT TO GET MY MONEY.

HE'S GOING THROUGH
YOU TO GET TO ME.

YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU'RE
TALKING ABOUT. [Doorbell Rings]

I DON'T HAVE TO BUY LOVE.

ALL IT TOOK WAS ONE
FLUTTER OF MY EYELASHES.

OH, HERE YOU ARE,
LOUISE. OH, THANKS, HELEN.

OH, HAPPY BIRTHDAY, MRS.
JEFFERSON, AND CONGRATULATIONS.

HAVE YOU SET THE DATE
FOR THE WEDDING YET?

I'LL TELL YOU THE DATE. THE
DAY MY MOTHER MARRIES...

IS THE DAY YOUR HUSBAND CHANGES
TO THE RIGHT COLOR. [Louise] GEORGE!

OH, IT'S ALL RIGHT, LOUISE.

IT'S A FREE COUNTRY,
EVEN FOR JACKASSES.

LET ME ASK YOU
SOMETHING, HELEN. MM-HMM.

DO YOU SEE ANY REASON
WHY I SHOULDN'T GET MARRIED?

WHAT ARE YOU ASKING
HER FOR? SHE AIN'T FAMILY.

SHE WILL BE WHEN
LIONEL MARRIES JENNY.

THAT'S ANOTHER FIGHT.
LET'S FINISH THIS ONE FIRST.

I'LL FINISH IT FOR YOU. I'LL DO JUST
WHAT I WANT. THAT'S TELLING HIM.

- WHY DON'T YOU GO HOME?
- I'M GOING.

THAT'S ALWAYS THE NICEST PART
ABOUT MEETING YOU... SAYING GOOD-BYE.

NOW, YOU LISTEN TO ME, MAMA. I'M
NOT GONNA LET YOU MARRY THIS GUY.

WHY SHOULD I LISTEN TO YOU?

YOU DIDN'T LISTEN TO ME WHEN I
TOLD YOU NOT TO MARRY LOUISE.

HEY, I'M ON YOUR SIDE.

OH, I'M SORRY, DEAR. NOW,
SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO?

YOU MADE ME SAY SOMETHING
MEAN ABOUT LOUISE. BUT, MAMA, SEE...

TAKE YOUR HANDS OFF ME!

WAIT, MOTHER JEFFERSON!
GEORGE DIDN'T MEAN WHAT HE SAID.

I'M SORRY, LOUISE. I'M GOING.

GEORGE, I USED TO DIAPER
YOU WHEN YOU WERE A BABY.

YOU WERE A MESS THEN,
AND YOU'RE STILL A MESS!

HI, WEEZ. HELLO.

YOU LOOK GOOD, LOVE,
LIKE A MILLION BUCKS.

UH-HUH.

MAYBE IT'S THE WAY YOU'RE WEARING
YOUR HAIR. WHAT DID YOU DO TO IT?

GOT CAUGHT IN THE RAIN
COMING HOME FROM SHOPPING.

WHAT'S COOKIN'? DINNER.

AND I BET IT'S THE BEST
DINNER IN THE WHOLE WORLD.

NOBODY COOKS BETTER
THAN YOU. THANKS.

HEY, THAT'S MORE LIKE IT.

WELL, I'M GLAD YOU'RE
NOT MAD AT ME ANYMORE.

WHO SAYS I'M NOT MAD? NOW,
YOU LISTEN TO ME. COOL IT, WEEZY.

I'M TRYING TO SAY I'M SORRY. MAYBE I SAID
A COUPLE THINGS THAT I SHOULDN'T HAVE.

MAYBE? YOUR MOTHER CAME
OVER FOR A HAPPY BIRTHDAY,

AND INSIDE OF FIVE MINUTES,
YOU DROVE HER OUT OF THE HOUSE.

DON'T RUB IT IN. I CAN'T
STAND IT NO MORE.

YOU HAVEN'T SAID A NICE
WORD TO ME IN TWO DAYS.

AND MAMA'S HOME ALL
ALONE, EATIN' HER HEART OUT.

I'M GONNA CALL HER
RIGHT NOW AND APOLOGIZE.

UH, GEORGE... NOT ONLY THAT,

I'M GONNA INVITE HER AND HER
BOYFRIEND OVER HERE FOR DINNER.

YOU DON'T HAVE TO
DO THAT. I KNOW THAT.

I'M WILLING TO MAKE THE FIRST MOVE. I
WANT TO SHOW THEM HOW BIG I CAN BE.

IT'S TOO LATE. I'VE ALREADY
CALLED YOUR MOTHER.

I APOLOGIZED FOR YOU AND INVITED
THEM OVER FOR DINNER TONIGHT.

HUH? SO IF YOU WANT TO BE BIG,

YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO GET
SOMEBODY TO STRETCH YOU.

[Doorbell Rings]

WELL, THAT'S THEM, GEORGE.

DON'T JUST STAND THERE.
MAKE THE FIRST MOVE.

I CAN'T WAIT TO MEET
YOUR NEW DADDY.

MAMA! HELLO, GEORGE.

MAMA. HELLO, LOUISE, DEAR.

I WANT YOU TO MEET MY
FRIEND, MR. HERBERT RUSSELL.

HERBERT, THIS IS MY DEAR
DAUGHTER-IN-LAW, LOUISE JEFFERSON.

HOW DO YOU DO? IT'S A PLEASURE.

THAT'S MY SON GEORGE.

WON'T YOU COME IN.

MY, YOU CERTAINLY
HAVE A BEAUTIFUL HOME.

UH-HUH, AND
EVERYTHING'S PAID FOR.

I'M SO GLAD YOU COULD
COME TO DINNER, MR. RUSSELL.

HERBERT, YOU'RE
IN FOR A REAL TREAT.

LOUISE IS A MARVELOUS COOK.

I AM?

WELL, WON'T YOU ALL SIT DOWN AND GET
ACQUAINTED WHILE I GET DINNER READY.

I'LL HELP YOU, LOUISE.

YOU WILL? YES. I HATE TO
SIT WHILE YOU'RE WORKING.

THAT'S TRUE. YOU
USUALLY LIE DOWN.

ISN'T SHE WITTY?

OH, SIT DOWN. THANK YOU.

UH, IT'S NICE MEETING
YOU, MR. JEFFERSON.

I'VE HEARD SO MUCH ABOUT
YOU FROM YOUR MOTHER.

YOU MEAN ABOUT MY BUSINESS
AND HOW SUCCESSFUL I AM? YES.

I THOUGHT SO. SHE'S
VERY PROUD OF YOU.

YEAH, MM-HMM.

HOW YOU FEELIN'? OH, FINE.
JUST FINE. NEVER BETTER.

GOOD. [Sighs]

THE WEATHER'S TURNED NICE
LATELY, HASN'T IT? IT SURE HAS.

YOU GOT A JOB?

NO. AHA!

AHA, WHAT? AHA, YOU AIN'T
GOT NO JOB. THAT'S WHAT AHA.

I HAVEN'T WORKED FOR YEARS.
OH, YOU LIVIN' ON WELFARE, HUH?

AND I'M NOT ON WELFARE.
THEN YOU AIN'T GOT NOTHIN'.

NOW, WAIT A MINUTE.
YOU GOT THIS ALL WRONG.

I'M RETIRED, AND I'M
COMFORTABLY WELL OFF.

VERY WELL OFF.

WELL, DON'T I GET
AN "AHA" FOR THAT?

WELL, WHY DIDN'T
YOU SAY THAT BEFORE?

WHEN DID I HAVE A CHANCE?
RIGHT AFTER YOU SAID HELLO.

ARE YOU SURE YOU
LIKE HIM, LOUISE?

WHY DO YOU KEEP ASKING ME THAT?

I TOLD YOU HE LOOKS LIKE A FINE
MAN AND A PERFECT GENTLEMAN.

I SUPPOSE SO, BUT I'VE BEEN
HAVING SECOND THOUGHTS.

OH, I SEE WHAT THE TROUBLE IS.

WELL, IT'S ONLY NATURAL FOR A BRIDE
TO HAVE DOUBTS BEFORE THE WEDDING.

I DON'T HAVE THOSE
KIND OF DOUBTS.

THIS ISN'T MY FIRST
MARRIAGE, YOU KNOW.

THEN WHAT'S BOTHERING
YOU? WELL, I'VE BEEN THINKING.

MAYBE I SHOULDN'T GET MARRIED
AGAIN. I'M USED TO LIVING ALONE.

BUT WOULDN'T IT BE BETTER TO HAVE
SOMEONE AROUND FOR COMPANIONSHIP?

YOU MAY NOT KNOW THIS, LOUISE, BUT I'M
NOT THE EASIEST PERSON TO GET ALONG WITH.

NO!

OH, YES, AND YOU KNOW,
HERBERT CAN BE VERY IRRITATING.

HOW? LIKE WHEN HE EATS,

HE JUST PUTS THE FOOD IN
HIS MOUTH AND SWALLOWS.

HE NEVER CHEWS. OH,
WELL, THAT'S NOT TOO MUCH.

AND WHEN HE DOES
CHEW, HIS PLATES CLICK.

DRIVES ME CRAZY.

WELL, WHAT'S A LITTLE
CLICKING BETWEEN LOVERS?

HE'S ALWAYS CONTRADICTING
ME, AND I'M NOT USED TO IT.

WELL, THAT'S JUST
BECAUSE YOU LIVE ALONE.

NO, IT'S BECAUSE I'M RIGHT.

WELL, ALL OF THESE
ARE SUCH LITTLE THINGS.

AND THAT'S NOT ALL.

HERBERT SNORES REAL LOUD.

MOTHER JEFFERSON!

HOW DID YOU KNOW THAT?

HE FELL ASLEEP AT
THE MOVIES. AND SHAME!

SHAME ON YOU, LOUISE.

DRINK UP, HERB. THERE'S PLENTY
MORE WHERE THAT CAME FROM.

THANK YOU. NOTHIN' LIKE A LITTLE BRANDY
TO WAKE UP A STOMACH BEFORE DINNER.

THAT AIN'T BRANDY.
THAT'S COGNAC. OH.

SO YOU'RE IN THE HOTEL
BUSINESS, HUH? HOW'D YOU DO?

I MANAGED TO PUT THREE
CHILDREN THROUGH COLLEGE.

ONE OF MY SONS IS A DOCTOR.

HEY, THAT'S NICE. YOU CAN
GET SICK FOR NOTHIN', HUH?

HOW'D YOU MANAGE THAT
ON A BELLHOP'S SALARY?

I WASN'T A BELLHOP. I
WAS IN MANAGEMENT,

SUPERVISING SERVICES FOR
A SMALL CHAIN OF HOTELS.

OH, WE CONTRACTED
FOR THE CATERING,

THE LAUNDRY, THE
CLEANING... YOU JIVIN'.

IN CHARGE OF CLEANING?
YEAH. AS A MATTER OF FACT,

YOU BEING IN THE CLEANING BUSINESS,
I'M SURPRISED YOU'RE NOT IN HOTEL WORK.

FUNNY YOU SHOULD MENTION THAT. I
PLAN ON GETTING INTO IT REAL SOON.

IF YOU NEED ANY CONTACTS...
NOT ANYMORE. I JUST GOT ME ONE.

I'M GONNA SEE WHAT'S
HOLDING DINNER UP.

BUT YOU'LL LOVE DOWN THERE
IN FLORIDA, MOTHER JEFFERSON.

ALL THAT SUNSHINE
AND DISNEY WORLD.

MAMA, I WAS WRONG.

YOU HAVE EXCELLENT
TASTE. HERBIE IS A FINE MAN.

YES, I KNOW, GEORGE.

BUT ABOUT OUR GETTING MARRIED...
DON'T WORRY ABOUT THE WEDDING, MAMA.

WE'RE GONNA HOLD IT RIGHT HERE,
AND I'M PAYING FOR THE WHOLE THING.

WHAT HAVE YOU BEEN
DRINKING, GEORGE? WHY?

BECAUSE WHATEVER IT IS, I WANT TO
MAKE SURE WE ALWAYS HAVE IT IN THE HOUSE.

NOW, GEORGE... DON'T THANK
ME, MAMA. YOU DESERVE IT.

SEE, MOTHER JEFFERSON? YOU'LL MAKE
GEORGE HAPPY BY GETTING MARRIED.

I WILL? SURE. LOOK AT ME.

WELL, IN THAT CASE...

SO GET DINNER ON. MY NEW
STEPDADDY IS GETTING HUNGRY.

DINNER WILL BE READY SOON, THEN WE CAN ALL
SIT DOWN AND TALK ABOUT THE WEDDING PLANS.

HMM? OH, YES. UH,
LISTEN, GEORGE.

THERE'S SOMETHING I HAVE
TO TALK OVER WITH YOU,

BUT I JUST DON'T
KNOW HOW TO SAY IT.

WHAT IS IT? IT'S
ABOUT THE WEDDING.

LOOK, DON'T WORRY
ABOUT IT. I'M PAYING FOR IT.

THAT'S NOT WHAT I
WANNA TALK ABOUT.

UH, YOU KNOW, IT'S-IT'S
KIND OF EMBARRASSING.

HEY, MAN, LOOK, YOU'RE PRACTICALLY
MY PAPA. YOU COULD SAY ANYTHING.

THANK YOU, GEORGE. I DON'T
WANT TO MARRY YOUR MOTHER.

WHAT?

I'M SORRY, BUT... WHAT'S
WRONG WITH HER?

NOTHING. YOUR MOTHER'S
A WONDERFUL WOMAN.

DON'T YOU LOVE HER? WELL, YES...

GOOD. AND NO.

LOOK, THIS AIN'T NO
MULTIPLE CHOICE.

IT'S GOT TO BE ONE OR THE OTHER.

YOU SEE, GEORGE,

MY PROBLEM IS I AM AN
INCURABLE ROMANTIC.

WELL, MARRIAGE WILL
CURE THAT JUST LIKE THAT.

NOW, WHAT I MEAN IS, WHEN I
FELL IN LOVE WITH YOUR MOTHER,

I WASN'T REALLY FALLING
IN LOVE WITH YOUR MOTHER.

I WAS FALLING IN LOVE WITH
THE IDEA OF FALLING IN LOVE.

WELL, CAN'T YOU SQUEEZE
MAMA IN THERE SOMEPLACE?

YOU KNOW, I WAS MARRIED ONCE
BEFORE, AND IT'S A PAINFUL MEMORY.

AH. CAN'T STAND THE THOUGHT
OF LOSING ANOTHER WIFE.

NO, I CAN'T STAND THE
THOUGHT OF GAINING ONE.

IT WAS 37 YEARS OF PURE HELL.

YOU KNOW, GEORGE, I DON'T THINK
I'M READY TO SETTLE DOWN YET.

WELL, HOW MUCH TIME
YOU FIGURE YOU GOT?

I MEAN, YOU WAIT MUCH
LONGER TO SETTLE DOWN,

AND YOU'LL FIND
YOURSELF STRETCHED OUT.

YOU KNOW, GEORGE,

IF I GO AHEAD AND
MARRY YOUR MOTHER,

I'D MAKE HER LIFE MISERABLE.

BUT IF TELL HER YOU DON'T WANT HER,
THAT'S GONNA MAKE HER EVEN MORE MISERABLE.

NOW, I DON'T WANT TO HURT
YOUR MOTHER. SHE'S A LOVELY LADY.

WAIT A MINUTE. I GOT
AN IDEA. I'LL TALK TO HER.

- I'LL TELL HER YOU'RE A RAT
AND NOT FIT TO MARRY HER.
- THAT WON'T WORK.

WHY NOT?

SHE'D NEVER BELIEVE
YOU. SHE'S CRAZY ABOUT ME.

GEORGE, I WAS JUST TALKING TO
YOUR MOTHER ABOUT THE WEDDING.

NOW, WHEN DO YOU
THINK WE SHOULD HOLD IT?

NO HURRY. YOU KNOW, MAYBE
TWO, THREE, FOUR YEARS,

WHEN THEY GET TO
KNOW EACH OTHER BETTER.

WHAT? A MINUTE AGO, YOU
WERE ALL FOR THE WEDDING.

NOW YOU'RE TALKING
LIKE YOU'RE AGAINST IT.

IT AIN'T THAT I'M AGAINST IT. IT'S
JUST THAT I AIN'T AS MUCH FOR IT...

AS I WAS AGAINST IT
BEFORE I WAS FOR IT.

HUH?

I WOULD LIKE TO SAY SOMETHING.
THIS DOESN'T CONCERN YOU, MAMA.

GET BACK IN THE KITCHEN. WHAT?

I'M SORRY. I MEAN... HUSH YOUR MOUTH,
GEORGE. I GOT SOMETHING TO SAY.

HERBERT,

WHAT I'M ABOUT TO SAY WILL PROBABLY
BREAK YOUR HEART, BUT I CAN'T MARRY YOU.

OH, REALLY?

NOW DON'T TRY TO
TALK ME OUT OF IT.

IT'S AS HARD FOR
ME AS IT IS FOR YOU.

BUT, OLIVIA, I DON'T
UNDERSTAND WHY YOU...

NOW, LISTEN, I'M JUST A
WOMAN, AND YOU'RE A MAN.

YOU'VE GOT TO BE
STRONG FOR BOTH OF US.

I'LL TRY, OLIVIA, BUT
IT WON'T BE EASY.

I KNOW.

OH, THIS IS TERRIBLE.

OH, DON'T TAKE IT SO HARD, DEAR.

ADMIT IT. YOU WOULD'VE
MISSED ME WAY DOWN IN FLORIDA.

YES, BUT I WAS WILLING
TO MAKE THE SACRIFICE.

OLIVIA, WE CAN STILL BE
GOOD FRIENDS, CAN'T WE?

HERBERT, AT OUR AGE,

EVEN IF WE GOT MARRIED, GOOD
FRIENDS IS ALL WE COULD BE ANYWAY.

GOOD NIGHT, MOTHER JEFFERSON!

I JUST CAN'T GET
OVER YOUR MOTHER.

WELL, SHE JUST DIDN'T WANT
TO GET MARRIED, THAT'S ALL.

I MEAN I CAN'T GET OVER HER
TELLING YOU NOT TO MARRY ME.

OH. DID SHE REALLY
TELL YOU THAT?

LOTS OF TIMES. AND YOU
DIDN'T LISTEN TO HER, DID YOU?

YOU'RE HERE, AIN'T YA?

WHAT MADE YOU DO IT, GEORGE?

WHAT MADE YOU GO AGAINST YOUR
MOTHER'S WISHES AND MARRY ME?

WELL, YOU WERE A LOT
YOUNGER THEN. A LOT PRETTIER.

[Louise] THE JEFFERSONS WAS RECORDED
ON TAPE IN FRONT OF A STUDIO AUDIENCE.