The Golden Girls (1985–1992): Season 3, Episode 9 - A Visit from Little Sven - full transcript

Although he is engaged to be married, Rose's cousin Sven falls in love with Blanche.

♪ THANK YOU FOR BEING A FRIEND ♪

♪ TRAVELED DOWN THE
ROAD AND BACK AGAIN ♪

♪ YOUR HEART IS TRUE ♪



♪ YOU'RE A PAL AND A CONFIDANT ♪

♪ AND IF YOU THREW A PARTY ♪

♪ INVITED EVERYONE YOU KNEW ♪

♪ YOU WOULD SEE ♪

♪ THE BIGGEST GIFT
WOULD BE FROM ME ♪

♪ AND THE CARD
ATTACHED WOULD SAY ♪

♪ THANK YOU FOR BEING A FRIEND ♪

DOROTHY, I WANT
A DRIVER'S LICENSE.

WHAT FOR?

I'M DOING A LOT OF STUNT WORK
IN THE NEW BURT REYNOLDS MOVIE.

WHY DO YOU THINK?

MA, YOU HAVEN'T DRIVEN IN
YEARS. WHY IS THIS COMING UP NOW?



THIS MORNING AT THE CENTER,

GLADYS WEINSTOCK
AND I HAD A FIGHT.

WE BOTH CLAIM WE'RE
NATURAL REDHEADS,

BUT OF COURSE, AT OUR AGE,
WE CAN'T PROVE IT ANYMORE.

SO?

SO, WHEN I PULLED OUT
MY LICENSE TO SHOW HER,

EVERYONE SAW IT WAS EXPIRED.

IT MADE ME FEEL OLD, DOROTHY.

- I WANT TO LEARN AGAIN.
- OH, COME ON.

MA, YOU'RE 81 YEARS OLD.

YOUR EYESIGHT IS WEAKER.
YOUR REFLEXES ARE SLOWER.

AND WHO ARE YOU, MAGIC JOHNSON?

DOROTHY, PLEASE.

OH, ALL RIGHT, MA,
WE'LL GIVE IT A TRY.

BUT, MA, IF ANYTHING
GOES WRONG WE STOP.

RELAX. THERE ARE SOME
THINGS YOU NEVER FORGET.

DRIVING A CAR IS
LIKE MAKING LOVE.

IN BOTH CASES, A
MIRROR MAKES OBJECTS

APPEAR LARGER
THAN THEY REALLY ARE.

OH, DOROTHY, I'M JUST SO ANGRY!

FLOYD MCCALLAN JUST CALLED ME

ONE HOUR BEFORE HE'S
SUPPOSED TO PICK ME UP

IN HIS BRAND NEW
TWO-TONE MERCEDES.

- HE'S CANCELED OUR DATE!
- HE PROBABLY HAD A GOOD REASON.

HE SAID HE HAD TO GO VISIT HIS
SICK MOTHER IN THE HOSPITAL.

DID YOU EVER HEAR
SUCH A WEAK EXCUSE?

[CHUCKLING] AND HIS
MOTHER ISN'T IN THE HOSPITAL.

OF COURSE SHE IS, BUT
HE CAN VISIT HER ANYTIME.

HE CAN ONLY SEE ME TONIGHT.

[DOOR UNLOCKING]

- IS MY COUSIN SVEN HERE YET?
- NO, ROSE.

OH, GOOD. I GOT
CAUGHT UP AT WORK

AND I BARELY HAD TIME
TO PICK UP THIS CAKE.

I WANTED TO MAKE
SVEN FEEL WELCOME.

ROSE, THAT CAKE IS FROM THE "GET
IT WHILE IT'S HOT" EROTIC BAKE SHOP.

WHOA!

[LAUGHING] WHY, ROSE NYLUND,
THAT CAKE IS IN THE SHAPE...

BLANCHE, WE KNOW WHAT IT IS.

I THOUGHT IT WAS IN
THE SHAPE OF FLORIDA.

THAT REMINDS ME, I'VE GOT TO
GIVE CHARLIE MILBURNE A CALL.

IF THIS CAKE REMINDS
YOU OF CHARLIE MILBURNE,

WE COULD BOTH GIVE HIM A CALL.

ROSE, HOW LONG IS YOUR
COUSIN SVEN GOING TO, UH,

[DISTRACTED] BE, UH,
STAYING HERE WITH US?

OH, JUST A COUPLE OF DAYS.

ON SATURDAY HE'S FLYING BACK
TO ST. OLAF TO MEET HIS FIANCEE.

OH, SHE WENT ALL ALONE?

NO, HE'S NEVER MET HER.
IT'S AN ARRANGED MARRIAGE.

SEE, LITTLE SVEN'S FATHER,
WE CALL HIM BIG SVEN,

LEFT THE OLD COUNTRY TWO
YEARS AGO AND SETTLED IN ST. OLAF.

THEN HE SENT FOR
THE REST OF HIS FAMILY.

FIRST HE BROUGHT HIS FATHER.
WE CALL HIM BIG SVEN, TOO.

WELL, DOESN'T THAT GET
CONFUSING, HAVING TWO BIG SVENS?

THERE AREN'T, BLANCHE.

THERE'S BIG SVEN
AND BIG SVEN II.

LIKE JAWS AND JAWS II.

ROSE, ARE ANY OF YOUR RELATIVES
NAMED PSYCHO AND PSYCHO II?

ANYWAY, BIG SVEN PICKED
OUT A BRIDE FOR LITTLE SVEN

AND NOW HE'S FLYING HIM OVER.

I DON'T KNOW, IT
SEEMS SO UNFAIR TO ME,

AN ARRANGED MARRIAGE.

OH, I DON'T KNOW, DOROTHY.
I THINK IT CAN BE FUN.

GEORGE AND I HAD
THAT KIND OF MARRIAGE.

GEORGE WOULD DRESS UP AS A GHOST
AND CHASE ME AROUND THE HOUSE

WITH ONE OF THOSE
LITTLE FLY SWATTERS.

THEN WHEN HE CAUGHT ME...

BLANCHE, I'M TALKING
ABOUT ARRANGED MARRIAGES,

NOT DERANGED MARRIAGES.

OH. SORRY.

[DOORBELL]

OH, THAT MUST BE SVEN!

- COUSIN ROSE?
- COUSIN SVEN!

OH!

OH, LET ME LOOK AT YOU.
BOY HAVE YOU GROWN!

WE'VE NEVER MET.

BUT ADMIT IT, YOU HAVE GROWN!

UH, ROSE, COULD YOU
INTRODUCE BLANCHE AND ME.

OF COURSE. DOROTHY,
THIS IS BLANCHE.

BLANCHE, THIS IS DOROTHY.

[LAUGHING]

WE HAVE JOKES LIKE THAT
AROUND HERE ALL THE TIME.

IT'S LIKE LIVING IN A HOUSE
FULL OF HOWIE MANDELS.

- SVEN, I'M DOROTHY.
- HELLO.

- AND I'M BLANCHE. WELCOME.
- THANK YOU.

ROSE TELLS US YOU'RE
GETTING MARRIED.

YES, AND I HOPE I'M GOOD AT IT.

I DON'T HAVE THAT MUCH
EXPERIENCE WITH WOMEN.

A BIG, STRONG,
HANDSOME THING LIKE YOU?

GET OUT OF HERE.

WELL, IT WAS NICE
MEETING ALL OF YOU.

OH, THAT WAS AN
EXPRESSION! SVEN!

I NEVER THOUGHT I'D SAY THIS

BUT I THINK ROSE GOT
THE BRAINS IN THAT FAMILY.

MEET ME OUT FRONT, DOROTHY.
I'M GONNA PULL THE CAR AROUND.

MA, HOLD IT. HOLD IT.

I TOLD YOU LAST NIGHT,
WE DON'T DO ANY DRIVING

UNTIL WE'VE GONE
OVER ALL THE RULES

IN THE DRIVING MANUAL.

WHAT'S TO GO OVER?

"HOW MUCH DISTANCE
SHOULD THERE BE

BETWEEN YOU AND A FIRE HYDRANT?"

WHAT AM I, A POODLE?

- [ROSE] MORNING, GIRLS.
- [SVEN] MORNING.

HEY, WHAT GOT YOU TWO
UP AND OUT SO EARLY?

I WANTED TO SHOW SVEN AS MANY
OF THE SIGHTS AS POSSIBLE TODAY.

DID HE GET A PICTURE WITH THAT
MR. WHIPPLE CUTOUT AT THE A&P?

WE STOPPED TO PICK UP BREAKFAST

BEFORE WE STARTED
OFF ON OUR BIG DAY.

WILL YOU LADIES JOIN US?

- WHAT ARE YOU MAKING?
- FLENDAHUEVEN.

- WHAT'S THAT?
- OATMEAL.

IT'S USUALLY SERVED
WITH A CRACKER

MADE FROM YAK INTESTINE.

OF COURSE! YAK SNACKS.

HI, GIRLS. HI, SWIN.

- IT'S SVEN, BLANCHE.
- WHATEVER.

DOROTHY, COULD I BORROW
YOUR WHITE WIND BREAKER?

FLOYD IS TAKING ME
SAILING TODAY ON HIS YACHT.

UM, BLANCHE...

I GUESS HE FELT SO GUILTY
ABOUT CANCELING LAST NIGHT

HE WANTED TO
SOMETHING EXTRA SPECIAL.

- UH, BLANCHE...
- I CAN JUST HARDLY WAIT.

- BLANCHE...
- IF YOU'RE ABOUT TO TELL ME

THAT FLOYD CANCELED,
I DON'T WANT TO HEAR IT.

- HE CALLED.
- OH!

THIS IS THE LAST
STRAW! THIS IS IT!

I DON'T CARE IF FLOYD DOES
OWN THE MOST SUCCESSFUL

PET NEUTERING BUSINESS
IN GREATER MIAMI.

AS OF THIS MINUTE,

I AM NEVER SPEAKING TO THAT
LOWDOWN SCUZZBALL EVER AGAIN!

[PHONE RINGS]

HE CHANGED HIS MIND!

HELLO. YES, THIS IS ROSE.

UH-HUH.

UH-HUH.

WELL, OKAY. BYE.

SVEN, I HAVE SOME BAD NEWS.

- IS IT BAD NEWS?
- YES, IT'S BAD.

WERE YOU TWO THE COUSINS WHO
PLAY THE BANJO IN DELIVERANCE?

- ROSE, WHAT'S WRONG?
- THAT WAS THE CENTER.

I HAVE TO WORK TODAY.

NOW WHO'S GONNA
SHOW SVEN THE SIGHTS?

THE ONLY SIGHTS WE'RE SEEING
IS THE EMPTY LOT BEHIND THE MALL.

I ALREADY SHOWED HIM THAT.

I HAVE AN IDEA.
BLANCHE, YOU'RE FREE.

WHY DON'T YOU TAKE SVEN AROUND?

I DON'T THINK I FEEL
LIKE SIGHTSEEING.

- IT MIGHT DO YOU GOOD.
- I KNOW IT'LL DO YOU GOOD.

AND IT'S CERTAINLY
A LOT HEALTHIER

THAN SITTING HERE IN THE
HOUSE STEWING ALL DAY.

MAYBE YOU'RE RIGHT.

AN ACTIVE DAY OUT ON THE TOWN
WITH A HANDSOME YOUNG MAN

JUST MIGHT TAKE MY MIND
COMPLETELY OFF OLD...

- WHAT'S-HIS-NAME.
- [LAUGHING]

FLOYD.

OKAY, COME ON, SWIN.

IT'S SVEN.

HE'S MINE NOW, I CAN
CALL HIM WHAT I WANT TO.

IF YOU DON'T MIND, BLANCHE,
I'D LIKE TO PAY FOR LUNCH.

OH, DON'T BE SILLY, SWIN.

I MEAN IT. YOU GAVE ME A
GREAT TOUR OF THE CITY TODAY.

I DON'T THINK WE HAVE THAT
MANY WOMEN SHOE STORES

IN MY WHOLE COUNTRY.

[GASPING] OH, MY LORD!
LOOK WHO JUST WALKED IN.

- WHO?
- FLOYD.

[BLANCHE] LOOK AT THAT
YOUNG THING WITH HIM.

- WHY, SHE'S HALF HIS AGE!
- SHE'S HALF YOUR AGE.

- SHUT UP AND HOLD MY HAND.
- WHAT?

HOLD MY HAND. NOW
LOOK DEEP INTO MY EYES.

LOOK LIKE YOU WANT TO KISS ME.

OKAY, MOVE YOUR LIPS
AROUND. GO LIKE THIS.

- BLANCHE, I DON'T...
- OKAY, GET READY TO KISS ME.

- BLANCHE...
- GET SET.

- BLANCHE...
- GO!

BLANCHE, IS THAT YOU?

WELL, FLOYD MCCALLAN!

OH, SHAME ON YOU,
SNEAKING UP ON US LIKE THAT.

AND IN FRONT OF THIS
YOUNG CHILD, TOO.

- BLANCHE, THIS IS LINDA.
- HELLO, LINDA.

IS YOUR DADDY TAKING
YOU OUT TO LUNCH?

- LINDA'S JUST A FRIEND.
- OOPS.

[CHUCKLES]

OH, FLOYD, I'M JUST SO
EMBARRASSED AT YOU,

CATCHING ME AND SWIN LIKE THIS.

OF COURSE, YOU SHOULD'VE
SEEN US A FEW MINUTES AGO.

WE WERE FEEDING EACH OTHER.

BLANCHE, LOOK, ABOUT
THOSE DATES I CANCELED...

HONEY, FORGET ALL
ABOUT THAT, I KNOW I HAVE.

- BLANCHE, CAN I CALL YOU LATER?
- OH, SURE, IF YOU WANT TO.

I'M NOT SURE I'LL BE AT HOME.

I JUST SUDDENLY HAVE
THIS CRAVING FOR DESSERT.

COME ON, SWIN, WE'RE
GOING TO YOUR PLACE.

OKAY, WE CAN TRY,

BUT I'VE NEVER SAILED
AROUND THE CAPE OF GOOD HOPE

THIS TIME OF YEAR.

I AM NEVER GETTING INTO A
CAR WITH YOU AGAIN. EVER.

I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU'RE
BEING SUCH A WIMP.

MA, YOU WENT THROUGH THE
STOP SIGN, YOU HIT A MAILBOX,

YOU ALMOST RAN
OVER MRS. BURLFEIN!

PLEASE, THE WOMAN'S
ALREADY IN A WHEELCHAIR.

HOW MUCH MORE DAMAGE COULD I DO?

HI, DOROTHY. WHY IS YOUR
LIPSTICK ALL SMEARED?

I JUST KISSED OUR DRIVEWAY.

- HI, EVERYBODY.
- HELLO, ROSE.

OH, HI, ROSE.

UH, WOULD YOU CONSIDER
TEACHING ME HOW TO DRIVE?

SURE, SOPHIA. HOW ABOUT THIS.

I TEACH YOU HOW TO
DRIVE AND YOU TEACH ME

HOW TO BE A GREAT ITALIAN COOK?

EVERYBODY'S A COMEDIAN TODAY.

ROSE, EVERYTHING OKAY DOWN
AT THE COUNSELING CENTER?

YES, FINALLY.

WE HAD A MANIC
DEPRESSIVE OVERLOAD.

BUT LUCKILY DR. FERGUSON HAD
HEARD SOME NEW KNOCK-KNOCK JOKES

AND THAT SEEMED TO DO THE TRICK.

- [CHUCKLING] KNOCK-KNOCK?
- WHO'S THERE?

OH, SHUT UP, ROSE!

HELLO, LADIES. HI, COUSIN ROSE.

SVEN, HI.

I WANT TO DO SOMETHING SPECIAL
IN HONOR OF YOUR WEDDING.

WHAT ARE YOU IN THE MOOD FOR?

OH, COUSIN ROSE, THERE
ISN'T GOING TO BE A WEDDING.

WHAT? WHY NOT?

BECAUSE I DECIDED I CAN'T
MARRY SOMEONE THAT I DON'T LOVE.

YOU'VE NEVER EVEN MET OLGA.
HOW DO YOU KNOW YOU DON'T?

BECAUSE I KNOW I'M IN
LOVE WITH SOMEONE ELSE.

I'M IN LOVE WITH BLANCHE.

SWIN, YOU CAN'T BE SERIOUS.
YOU'RE NOT IN LOVE WITH ME.

YES I AM, BLANCHE.

I KNOW IT'S SUDDEN,
BUT I FEEL IT IN MY HEART.

HIS FATHER IS GONNA KILL ME.

I'M IN CHARGE OF SVEN
FOR ONE DAY AND HE FALLS

FOR THE FIRST LITTLE
FLOOZY THAT TURNS HIS HEAD.

BLANCHE, DID SOMETHING
HAPPEN BETWEEN YOU AND SVEN

THAT WE DON'T KNOW ABOUT?

YOU DIDN'T TELL THEM
ABOUT KISSING ME?

KISSING HIM?

OR STROKING MY HAIR?

STROKING HIS HAIR?

OR FEEDING ME?

ALL RIGHT, I'LL SAY
IT. FEEDING HIM?

I CAN'T HEAR ANY MORE OF THIS.

BLANCHE, HOW COULD
YOU DO THIS TO ME?

ROSE, WAIT A MINUTE.

I CAN EXPLAIN EVERYTHING.
IT'S NOT LIKE YOU THINK.

IF SVEN SAID YOU KISSED
HIM, YOU KISSED HIM.

I DID KISS HIM BUT IT
WAS JUST PRETEND.

WE WERE HAVING LUNCH
AT FAIRVIEW GARDENS.

WELL, FLOYD MCCALLAN
WALKED IN WITH ANOTHER WOMAN.

SO I PRETENDED SWIN
WAS MY BOYFRIEND

JUST TO MAKE FLOYD JEALOUS.

DID YOU EXPLAIN
ANY OF THIS TO SVEN?

I ASSUMED HE KNEW.

BLANCHE, HOW COULD
YOU ASSUME ANYTHING?

THE MAN OFFERED TO KILL
DINNER FOR US LAST NIGHT.

MAYBE I MADE A MISTAKE,

BUT I DON'T THINK I DID
ANYTHING SO TERRIBLE.

WELL, I DO!

THERE IS A SWEET, INNOCENT MAN
WHOSE HEART IS GONNA GET BROKEN

BECAUSE YOU DECIDED TO USE
HIM IN ONE OF YOUR PETTY GAMES.

THAT'S ONLY ONE SIDE OF
IT. LOOK AT THE OTHER SIDE.

HE DID GET TO KISS ME.

BIG DEAL.

MORE PEOPLE GET TO KISS
YOU THAN THE POPE'S RING.

YOU HAVE TO GO IN
THERE AND TALK TO HIM.

I WILL, I WILL.

IT'S JUST THAT I'M
NOT VERY GOOD AT IT.

I WAS ONLY BLESSED
WITH ONE TALENT,

TURNING MEN ON.

I'VE JUST NEVER KNOWN
HOW TO TURN THEM OFF.

YOU TELL HIM, DOROTHY.

I WOULD, BLANCHE, BUT REMEMBER,

WE JUST WANT TO TURN HIM OFF,

NOT DRAIN THE SEX DRIVE
COMPLETELY OUT OF HIM!

YOU KNOW, I'VE ALWAYS HAD THIS
TROUBLE EVER SINCE HIGH SCHOOL.

I WAS THE HEAD
CHEERLEADER AND I WAS DATING

OUR STAR QUARTERBACK,
CALWELL HONEYCUTT.

WELL, TIME CAME TO BREAK UP

AND I JUST COULD NOT
TELL CALWELL TO HIS FACE.

I COULDN'T BEAR TO INFLICT THAT
MUCH GRIEF AND SUFFERING ON HIM.

SO I FINALLY DECIDED THAT
THE BEST WAY TO HANDLE IT

WAS JUST TO LEAD MY
GIRLS IN A FAREWELL CHEER.

TWO-FOUR-SIX-EIGHT, WHO
WILL BLANCHE NO LONGER DATE?

CALWELL.

DID HE GET THE MESSAGE,

OR DID THE BAND HAVE TO SPELL
OUT "BUZZ OFF" AT HALFTIME?

[CHUCKLES]

YOU HAVE TO GO IN THERE
AND SET SVEN STRAIGHT.

THE LONGER YOU WAIT,
THE HARDER IT'LL GET.

I KNOW. YOU'RE RIGHT. I WILL.

OF COURSE SHE'S RIGHT.

YOU KNOW, I ONCE MADE
THE SAME MISTAKE MYSELF.

I WAS DATING A GUY MY
PARENTS COULD NOT STAND.

HE USED TO COME OVER TO THE
HOUSE DURING SUNDAY DINNER,

HELP HIMSELF TO SOME FOOD,
TAKE IT INTO THE LIVING ROOM,

TURN ON ONE OF THOSE
RADIO COUNTDOWN SHOWS

AND BELCH TO THE MUSIC.

FINALLY, MY MOTHER TOLD ME
THAT I JUST HAD TO BREAK IT OFF

AND, OF COURSE, I
KNEW SHE WAS RIGHT.

SO I REHEARSED MY SPEECH
AND I MADE ARRANGEMENTS

TO MEET HIM AT A COFFEE SHOP.

I GOT THERE FIVE MINUTES EARLY

AND CAUGHT HIM
NECKING WITH A WAITRESS.

- [BLANCHE] OH!
- THAT MUST'VE MADE IT EASIER.

NO, I STILL COULD NOT DO IT.

HOW LONG HAD YOU BEEN
TOGETHER WITH THIS GUY?

THIRTY-EIGHT YEARS.

- THAT WAS STAN?
- AND YOU KNOW, TO THIS DAY

HE CAN BELCH OUT THE CHORUS
TO SWEET GEORGIA BROWN

ON ONE DR. PEPPER.

WELL, I'M GONNA GO TALK TO SWIN.

I'LL JUST LET HIM DOWN GENTLY.

IN THE OLD COUNTRY WHEN
A WOMAN DUMPS A MAN,

THE MAN IS ALLOWED TO
SHAVE THE WOMAN'S HEAD

AND MAKE HER WEAR AN ITCHY HAT.

I HEAR PAKISTAN HAS THE
SAME PENALTY FOR JAYWALKING.

- SWIN.
- HI, BLANCHE.

IS SOMETHING WRONG?

NO, I'M JUST EMBARRASSED
ABOUT WHAT HAPPENED BEFORE.

EMBARRASSED? WHAT FOR?

- FOR ACTING SO CRAZY.
- OH, THAT WASN'T CRAZY.

YES, WE KISSED ONE TIME,
I LET IT GO TO MY HEAD.

I'VE BEEN TRYING TO UNDERSTAND
WHAT MADE ME ACT THAT WAY.

COULD IT BE THAT I'M JUST
NERVOUS ABOUT GETTING MARRIED?

YES.

OR THAT I'M NOT USED TO BEING
WITH A BEAUTIFUL WOMAN LIKE YOU?

YES.

OR THAT I'M JUST A NAIVE,
INEXPERIENCED MAN.

- YES.
- NO.

IT'S NONE OF THOSE
THINGS, BLANCHE.

IT'S BECAUSE I LIKE YOU.

- I LIKE EVERYTHING ABOUT YOU.
- SWIN.

- YOU HARDLY KNOW ME.
- I KNOW ENOUGH.

- I KNOW YOU'RE PRETTY.
- YES.

- YOU'RE SMART.
- YES.

- SEXY.
- YES.

- SOPHISTICATED.
- YES... NO!

SWIN, THERE'S SOMETHING
VERY IMPORTANT YOU DON'T KNOW.

OH, I DON'T KNOW
HOW TO SAY THIS.

IT'S THE REASON I KISSED
YOU IN THE FIRST PLACE.

[SCOFFING] TO MAKE
FLOYD JEALOUS.

- YOU KNEW THAT?
- YES.

AND I THINK YOU HAD EVERY RIGHT.

HE DESERVED IT THE WAY
HE'S BEEN REJECTING YOU.

WHAT DO YOU MEAN REJECTING ME?

WELL, CANCELING
TWICE IN TWO DAYS.

THEN HE SHOWS UP WITH
THAT GIRL TODAY. WOO!

- HOW OLD COULD SHE HAVE BEEN?
- NOT VERY.

YOU'RE NOT LIKE MOST WOMEN,
BLANCHE, I'LL TELL YOU THAT.

WHAT DO YOU MEAN?

WOULDN'T MOST WOMEN LET A
THING LIKE THIS MAKE THEM FEEL OLD?

YES.

- AND UNATTRACTIVE.
- YES.

- WORN OUT.
- YES.

USELESS.

WHAT'S YOUR POINT, SWIN?

MY POINT IS...

WELL, I WAS JUST HOPING
THAT MAYBE YOU'RE TIRED

OF PEOPLE LIKE FLOYD
WHO DON'T APPRECIATE YOU,

AND MAYBE YOU'RE
READY TO SPEND SOME TIME

WITH SOMEONE WHO DOES.

LIKE YOU.

I KNOW YOU DON'T
KNOW ME VERY WELL YET,

BUT I'M JUST ASKING
FOR A CHANCE.

OKAY, I'LL THINK ABOUT IT.

THANK YOU, BLANCHE.

YOU'RE WELCOME, SWIN.

[BIRDS CHIRPING]

- HI, MA.
- READ IT AND WEEP.

A DRIVER'S LICENSE? MA,
HOW DID YOU GET THIS?

HARD WORK AND DETERMINATION.

IF YOU PUT YOUR MIND TO
IT, YOU CAN DO ANYTHING.

LOOK, MA, I ABSOLUTELY
FORBID YOU TO DRIVE A CAR.

OOH, LOOK, DOROTHY, I'M SHAKING.

MA, I MEAN IT!

LIGHTEN UP.

I TOLD YOU BEFORE, I ONLY WANT
A LICENSE TO HAVE NOT TO USE.

IT'S A SYMBOL OF MY
FREEDOM, MY INDEPENDENCE.

NOW GIVE ME 50 DOLLARS.

WHAT FOR?

A GUY NAMED PACO MAKES
THESE BABIES UP IN HIS GARAGE.

GOOD MORNING, GIRLS.

I DIDN'T SLEEP A WINK LAST NIGHT
WORRYING ABOUT BLANCHE AND SVEN.

ROSE, THIS IS BETWEEN
THE TWO OF THEM.

NO, IT ISN'T. I'M SUPPOSED TO
GET SVEN ON A PLANE TODAY.

THAT'S WHY I CALLED BIG
SVEN EARLY THIS MORNING

TO ASK HIM WHAT TO DO.

I KNEW HE'D BE UP, HE
GETS UP WITH THE COWS.

I KNOW HE GETS UP WITH THE COWS
BECAUSE HE SLEEPS WITH THE COWS.

WHAT IS YOUR POINT, ROSE?

BIG SVEN WAS FURIOUS WITH ME.

HE TOLD ME TO DO NOTHING,
HE'D HANDLE EVERYTHING.

THEN HE HUNG UP ON ME.

- GOOD MORNING!
- MAYBE IT IS FOR YOU.

NOW, ROSE, YOU CAN'T GO
ON BEING MAD AT ME OVER THIS.

I FEEL JUST AS BAD AS YOU DO.

DO YOU HAVE AN ANGRY VIKING
YELLING SCANDINAVIAN SWEAR WORDS

AT YOU ON THE
PHONE THIS MORNING?

MY GUESS WOULD BE NO.

ROSE, AS I TOLD YOU LAST NIGHT,

YOUR COUSIN IS A
VERY SENSITIVE MAN.

I JUST HAVE TO FIND THE
RIGHT TIME AND PLACE

AND I'LL LET HIM DOWN SOFTLY.

MORNING, EVERYONE.

[DOORBELL]

WHO COULD THAT BE?

- ROSE NYLUND?
- YES.

WOW.

I'M OLGA NOLSTROM,
FROM ST. OLAF.

I'M LOOKING FOR SVEN LINSTROM.

HE'S RIGHT THERE.

WOW.

SVEN, YOUR FATHER SENT ME.

I WAS CHOSEN TO BE YOUR BRIDE.

I'M NOT LEAVING THIS
HOUSE WITHOUT YOU.

WOW.

UH, NOW MIGHT BE A GOOD
TIME TO LET HIM DOWN SOFTLY.

OUR CAB IS WAITING,
SVEN. WILL YOU COME?

BLANCHE, I'VE DONE
SOME THINKING.

I COULD NEVER MAKE YOU HAPPY.

IF YOU COULD NEVER
MAKE HER HAPPY,

GOOD LUCK WITH THE LEAN,
MEAN, SWEDISH MACHINE.

I UNDERSTAND, SVEN. GO ON.

GO ON.

I'M COMING, OLGA.

OH, COUSIN ROSE, THANK YOU!

THANK YOU ALL.

OH, WAIT. WHAT ABOUT MY CLOTHES?

THEY'RE UGLY. ANY
OTHER QUESTIONS?

I'LL SEND THEM TO YOU.
YOU TWO BE ON YOUR WAY.

- GOOD LUCK!
- THANK YOU. THANK YOU.

BYE!

OH, ISN'T THAT WONDERFUL?

WONDERFUL? HE JUST DROPPED ME!

OH, BLANCHE, COME ON.
YOU HAD NO INTEREST IN SVEN.

THAT'S NOT THE POINT, DOROTHY.

THE POINT IS FOR THE
SECOND TIME IN TWO DAYS

I HAVE BEEN THROWN OVER
FOR A YOUNGER WOMAN.

I CAN'T COMPETE ANYMORE.

OH, HONEY, OF COURSE YOU CAN.

YOU JUST HAVE TO
COMPETE IN A DIFFERENT WAY,

LIKE WITH INTELLIGENCE
AND CHARM.

I DON'T KNOW THOSE WAYS,
ROSE, AND I'M TOO OLD TO LEARN.

I'M OVER THE HILL,
THAT'S ALL THERE IS TO IT.

[PHONE RINGS]

I GUESS I'M JUST IN THE SAME
BOAT AS THE TWO OF YOU.

[BLANCHE] HELLO?

YES.

[GIGGLES]

ALL RIGHT.

GOODBYE.

WHAT DO YOU KNOW.

FLOYD MCCALLAN IS
TAKING ME SAILING TODAY.

I GUESS YOU TWO
ARE IN THE SAME BOAT.

I'M IN THE YACHT.

WHAT'S THIS BOAT SHE
KEEPS TALKING ABOUT?

DON'T WORRY,
ROSE. YOU MISSED IT.