The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air (1990–1996): Season 5, Episode 2 - What's Will Got to Do with It? - full transcript

(Will)
On the last
"Fresh Prince of Bel-Air.."

Hey, hey, Uncle Phil, man,
I gotta give you props

for investing
in this record store, man.

That must've been
a lot of money.

H-how much are we really worth?

We?

[laughing]

♪ Hey DJ keep playin'
that song ♪

♪ All night ♪

♪ On and on and on ♪

♪ Hey Mr. DJ ♪



♪ All the girls are ready.. ♪♪

Ching-ching!

♪ Boy it's time I told ya ♪

♪ I can't wait no longer ♪

♪ Got to make up your mind ♪♪

I heard enough,
she's a knock-out.

I definitely wanna sign her.

Will..

...you better be sure
you know what you're doin'.

Uncle Phil, I know exactly
what I'm doing.

[theme song]

♪ Now this is a story
all about how ♪

♪ My life got flipped
turned upside down ♪

♪ And I'd like to take a minute
just sit right there ♪



♪ I'll tell you how
I became the prince ♪

♪ Of a town called Bel-Air ♪

♪ In West Philadelphia
born and raised ♪

♪ On the playground was
where I spent most of my days ♪

♪ Chillin' out maxin'
relaxin' all cool ♪

♪ And all shootin' some B-ball
outside of the school ♪

♪ When a couple of guys
who were up to no good ♪

♪ Started making trouble
in my neighborhood ♪

♪ I got in one little fight
and my mom got scared ♪

♪ And said you're movin'
with your auntie ♪

♪ And uncle in Bel-Air ♪

♪ I whistled for a cab
and when it came near ♪

♪ The license plate said fresh
and it had dice in the mirror ♪

♪ If anything I could say
that this cab was rare ♪

♪ But I thought
nah forget it ♪

♪ Yo homes to Bel-Air ♪

♪ I pulled up to a house
about seven or eight ♪

♪ And I yelled to the cabbie
yo homes smell ya later ♪

♪ I looked at my kingdom
I was finally there ♪

♪ To sit on my throne
as the prince of Bel-Air ♪♪

Six is completely unacceptable.

It's Will Smith you talking to.

I want ten.

Oh, no, no, no, no, no,
you got to give me ten

or I'm taking Ashley Banks
elsewhere.

That's what I thought.
You're a very smart man.

No, no, love you.Ciao.

Negotiating
for a bigger royalty?

No, a better table.

I got a business meeting
tomorrow night at the Roxy.

Boy, this management thing
is love. Trust me.

People trippin'
all over themselves

just to make you happy.

Hey, now I know
how Hammer must have felt

the week he was famous.

Look at you, Will.

These insincere sycophants
ply you with gifts

shower you with money, and why?

Is it because you have
any discernable talents? No.

It's because you control
someone else who does.

- You want a job, don't you?
- Yes.

Well, I ain't got no problem
keeping it in the family.

You can handle the money,
business manager.

Ah! Yes! You're gonna be
watching me, aren't you?

Like white folks watch "Wings."

- Hi, everyone.
- 'Oh!'

Hey, Hil. I got a great idea
for your talk show.

Divas!
Past, Present and Future.

On the same show you have
Aretha, Whitney and Ashley.

Who's Ashley?

Your sister.

Well, Ashley hasn't even
released a single yet.

I need guests
who can deliver ratings.

I mean, if she wants to come sit
in the audience or something

you know..

[intercom buzzes]

(Will)
'Yes, Martha?'

(Martha)
'Mr. Berry and his associates
are here.'

Yes, send them in, please.

Alright, let me do
all the talking.

All you got to do
is agree with everything I say

and disagree
with everything they say.

[scoffs]
Why don't I just smile and nod?

Better.

[laughing]

Gordy. What's up? You look fabu.

Ah! It's nice to see you, Will.
Carlton.

What that? What that? Brother,
you got to show me love.

- Come in here.
- Hey!

Thanks. Uh, listen,
you know my associates.

Uh, yeah, Rob, Fab.
Blame it on the rain, brothers.

[chuckles]

[laughing]

Will, Will, Will, this is quite
an office you've got here. Huh?

Oh, yeah, you like it? Actually,
I'm not even finished yet.

I'm having a bust
of my head made.

It's getting helicoptered in
on Thursday.

Oh! Hey, suppose we get
right down to business?

Yes, sir. Hey, y'all fellas,
have a seat.

Watch them beads on my leather,
bro.

Alright.

- Now, Gordy.
- 'Yeah?'

What is the best way
to launch a new act?

Well, Will, I've always found--

(Will)
Ease up a second there, bro.

Uh, that was one of them there
rhetorical questions

you know what I mean?

Ain't that right, Carlton?

Alright.

We're gonna introduce
Ashley to the world..

...in person.

Announcing the Ashley Banks
North American tour.

Right.

Okay.

Now, we gonna start
right here in New York, right?

And then, blang,
over to Phoenix.

Then bap, bap, bap, bladow,
over to Orlando.

Then blip-bloop, we gonna
slide up to Seattle.

- Next we--
- Will, Will, Will, Will.

We would need a jet
to meet that kind of schedule.

I mean, we simply don't
have those kind of resources.

Oh, well, y'all got a couple of
weeks to come up with the funds.

I got dates
in all these cities.

You've already booked the tour?

Oh, no, no, no, bro,
I said, "I got dates."

See, I got Tina in New York.

I got Beth in Seattle. Ooh.

Actually, I might need
a couple days in Seattle.

Beth is a big girl,
you know what I mean?

You know what I'm sayin'?
Oh, you laughing.

You must like them
a little rotund yourself.

Will, Will, uh, now wouldn't
it be more effective

to shoot a video for Ashley?

Oh, come on, Gordy.
Video is dead, man.

- Ain't that right, Carlton?
- Uh, absolutely.

Most of the arcades
are losing money.

I mean..

Right. Moving on.

Next, I got a publicity stunt
planned for Ashley.

We gonna set up lunch with her
and Tevin Campbell. Right?

Midway through,
she gonna stand up, take a drink

and splash it in his face.
Right?

Then she slap him,
call him a punk

in front of the whole peoples
in the restaurant.

Just "punk."
Just scream it out.

Next, we plant a story

that Tevin been sleeping
outside her crib with a rifle.

Now, it ain't gonna do too much
for Tevin's career

but Ashley becomes
America's favorite victim.

Now, Will,
uh, Tevin is a great kid.

Oh, no, no, no,
this just business here.

He's also my godson.

Then you can be there for him.
Why don't you sleep on it?

Let that marinate
a little bit, alright?

Yeah, I'll do that.

Uh.. This meeting
has been very interesting.

Yes, sir. Yes, sir.

Hey, this is just the first
of many, man.

- Ah! Okay.
- Hey, Gordy.

- Yeah?
- I can feel it.

We are gonna make history.

History? Hm.

That's just the word
I was thinking.

- Goodbye, Will.
- Alright.

That went great.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, Carlton,
slow down, man.

I was with Tisha last night.
I can't walk that fast.

Will, we're late.

Relax, Carlton.
Look here, I'm Ashley's manager.

You see all this?
I run all this.

They can't start
none of this thing without me.

♪ Boy you're running
out of time ♪

♪ Got to make up your mind ♪

♪ Tell me tell me ♪

♪ I gotta go I gotta go baby ♪

♪ This is how I feel inside ♪

♪ I won't waste your time
or mine ♪

Who the hell
are all these people?

Pfft! I don't know.

♪ After all I do for you.. ♪♪

Ashley, why don't you
take a five?

We'll hit it hard
in a little bit, alright?

Will, I'm so glad you came.

Of course I came, Ashley,
I'm your manager.

Will, didn't you talk to daddy?

About what?

What's going on here?

Uh, Ashley,
I'll take care of this.

Why don't you, uh, go listen
to some of the playback?

You're doing great.

- Who are you?
- Jerry DeCarlo.

Gordy Berry thought you might
need a little help

from a more experienced manager.

But you're the man, Will.
You're the man.

I'm just the man behind the man.

Oh, uh-huh.
And what you doin' back there?

Will, we'd like you to focus on

one of our
more established clients.

Oh, really? Who?

Tito, Jermaine. Your pick.

Look here, buddy, uh..

I don't think you quite
understand what's goin' on here.

Alright? I run all this, okay?

And Ashley is not having
this at all, right?

So you need to get to goin',
alright?

Go ahead, take care.

Will, I wish you had
come home last night.

I didn't mean for you
to find out about it this
way.

Oh, you knew about this, huh?

Jer, would you excuse us
for a minute, please?

[scoffs]
"Jer?"

Oh, no, no. I-I'm calm.

Uncle Phil, how could you
sell me like this, man?

Will, Will, you're making this
more difficult

than it has to be.
The decision has been made.

- Carlton, that's eavesdropping.
- So?

This is better than television.

Uncle Phil,
I put this whole thing together.

I will not be
thrown out on my..

Ashley, would you quit it?

Will, you are no longer
in charge.

[gasps]

Oh, great.

Now we'll never know
how Will took the news.

[instrumental music]

(man on radio)
'Three weeks
and the way you folks'

'have been requesting it,
it's gonna be there forever.'

'Here's smoking Ashley Banks
with "Make Up Your Mind."'

[instrumental music on radio]

[speaking in foreign language]

'...Smokin' Ashley Banks.'

[instrumental music on radio]

♪ Tell me why you're playing
with my.. ♪

[yelling]

All this money for rent
and I still got roaches.

Will.

I want you to come home.

Home? Oh, I have no home.

Oh, come on,
the whole family misses you.

Family? Oh, I have no family.

Alright, you've made your point.

Point, I have no..

Very clever, Uncle Phil.

Oh, but then again,
you are this big-time lawyer.

Will..

...this wasn't an easy thing
for me to agree with.

We both know that you were
in over your head.

I was just trying to do the best
thing I could for Ashley.

You can push me out
and take everything over

but we both know
I made Ashley Banks.

Well, gee, I-I could have sworn
that Vivian and I

had something to do with it.

You know what I'm talking about,
Uncle Phil.

I got the deal,
then I got the shaft.

Alright,
I understand that you're
angry

but I'm asking you to come home.

- Home? I have no home.
- 'Alright.'

[sighs]
You cannot live here forever.

I ain't planning on
living here forever.

Just till I'm dead.

Smith, we gotta talk.

Look, not now, Mr. Weisman,
I'm in the middle of a meeting.

No, you're not.
Your lease ran out last
week.

I want you out of here
by the end of today.

I got the worst luck
with tenants.

Can I still come home?

Home? I thought you had no home.

- Uncle Phil--
- Uncle? What uncle?

I thought you had no uncle.

- Just tell me where the car is.
- 'I have no car.'

[instrumental music]

- Will.
- Hey, Aunt Viv.

- You happy to see me?
- Yes.

It's so hard to smack you
upside your head

when you're not here.

I thought you said
everybody wanted me back.

Come on, now, Vivian,
we can't blame Will

for what's happened to
Ashley.

Wh-what? Okay, wait, wait.
Time out.

What happened to Ashley?

This singing contract
has gone straight to her head.

Oh, now, these new managers are
putting a lot pressure on her

and she's doing the best
she can with it.

I mean, after all, they must be
doing something right.

She is in heavy rotation
on The Box.

Whatever that is.

I'm glad you're okay with this,
because I don't like it.

Not one little bit.

Gee, she hides it so well.

Hey, yo, man,
is Ashley really that bad?

I'm afraid so, Master William.

Perhaps later on, we could
pour some water on her

and watch her melt.

Carlton, do you hear that?

You mean your song on the radio?

No, I mean the cash
registers
racking up my record sales.

[laughing]
Isn't she funny?

Don't just stand there, Ashley.

Call him a good boy
and toss him a treat.

Will, don't be mad.

I'm thanking you
on my album cover.

Oh, really? So thanks.

What the hell is my problem?

There she is,
America's sweetheart.

Watch the hair!

I have some very exciting
news for you.

Well, make it quick, Miss Banks
has to mentally prepare

for her appearance tomorrow
at dad's record store.

I have the greatest idea
for my talk show.

It's a salute to divas.

Past, present and future.

Hilary, that is my idea.

Right, just like you launched
Ashley's career?

So how about it, Ash?

Oh, Hilary,
it sounds really wonderful

and I'd love to do it,
but, well

my managers
have this silly little idea

about me only doing
important shows.

Oh, so, what you doin',
"60 Minutes?"

[scoffs]
So young, so bitter.

Carlton!

Oh, she is so self-centered.

I hear that. After
everything
I've done for her.

You? Who's talking about you?

Well, I'm talking about
Miss Thing.

Somebody need to snatch her big

helium head down
out the stratosphere.

Excuse me, I need to talk
to Queen Sheba.

Alone.

Will..

...I never wanted to fire you.

- Really?
- Of course not.

I would've been happy
paying you a token salary

while someone else
did the real work.

I discovered you.

And don't think
I'm not grateful..

...but it's time for me to take
my career to the next plateau.

And, face it,
you're small potatoes.

Small potatoes?

I'll show you how small
my potatoes are.

Carlton!

[instrumental music]

Sorry, no. Next.

Sorry, too tall.

Uh!
You're a little too big-boned.

Well, okay. Okay, uh..

Get a tan.

No. No.

No. Would you think?

Hey, Will, look what I found.

Jazz, she looks
just like Ashley.

The resemblance, much like
the beat, goes on.

Sing something, honey.

♪ Although I'm crazy about ya ♪

♪ I can live without ya ♪

♪ And you wastin' my time ♪

[laughing]

Jazz, she's great. I'm back!

You? Get your own client.
This one's mine.

Come on, Bashley.

Oh, what're you doing here?

Doesn't Ashley got some boots
that need licking?

Well, she found out I was
skimming money off the top

so she fired me.

Her own brother.

Face it, man, family means
nothing to Ashley no more.

Look what she did to me.

Yeah, well, at least you still
have your 15 percent.

All I got was a promise
she wouldn't press charges.

Hey, wait, wait, wait. Whoa.

Wh-what're you talking about?

I-I don't have no 15 percent.

Will, you had an oral agreement
with Ashley.

That's legally binding.

Just ask Kim Basinger.

Wait a minute, you right, man.

I didn't even think about that.
Thanks a lot, C.

I think I'll, uh, slide down
to this record store

and give the good news
to Little Miss Fat Head.

[instrumental music]

- Where are all the people?
- Philip, I don't know.

But you've gotta do
something.

She's been sitting there
for hours.

Hey, kid, how'd you like to have
your own personal CD

of "Make Up Your Mind," huh?

Man, that song is weak.

Last week.

I thought you said
this was gonna be a hit.

It was, we had such good
positive feedback

that we threw extra promotional
muscle behind it

saturated our key demo playlist
and topped out.

- What does that mean?
- The kids got sick of her.

Oh, hey, what's up, y'all?
How you doing?

Ah, man, let's see,
I guess I'll get one of these.

Yeah. Oh, yeah.

Nas in the house.

Oh, Partners In Rhyme.

- I love that CD.
- What're you doing?

Oh, I just want
my piece of the pie.

Well, you know,
seeing as how Ashley and I

have a legally binding
oral agreement

which guarantees my 15 percent.

[chuckling]
Oh!

Well, I guess you got me there.

So tell me something.

How much is 15 percent
of nothing?

It's, um.. Okay, 15.

Hol-hold up, 15,
carry the zero, 15..

Nothing, you math whiz.

Fifteen percent of nothing
is nothing.

Alright, what,
w-w-what're you talking
about?

(Philip)
'Well, evidently Ashley
is not gonna be as big a star'

as they thought
she was going to be.

And I can't say
that I'm not happy about it.

Me either.

Well, it's nice to know
my family

was rooting for me to fail.

Ashley, that is not at all
what we.. Ashley.

- This is all your fault, Will.
- This is all your fault, Will.

♪ Tell me why you're playing
with my mind boy.. ♪♪

Hey, Ashley.

Hey, y-y-you mind signing my CD?

Very funny.

No, come on.
I'm being serious, Ashley.

One day you gonna be famous
in somethin'

and a signed CD is gonna be
worth some real dough.

Or if not, we can use it to
prop up an unlevel table.

You know,
so it won't be wobblin'.

- Is that a smile?
- No.

Yes.

Why are you being so nice to me?

I was such a jerk.

Well, you learned
from the master.

Look, this whole thing had us
all acting a little crazy.

Hey, I'll tell you what.

Why don't we forget
the apologies

call it even. Deal?

Deal.

Come here. Come here. Come here.

[crying]

- Will?
- Hmm?

Are you crying too?

No, cold-and-flu season.

Oh, you guys.

[instrumental music]

[theme music]

♪ Yeah ♪

♪ Yeah ♪

♪ Yeah ♪

♪ Yeah ♪

♪ Yeah ♪

♪ Yeah ♪♪