The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air (1990–1996): Season 2, Episode 19 - Eyes on the Prize - full transcript

Hey, Uncle Phil.

I think Aunt Viv put the Ring
Dings in the cabinet over here.

The sink is busted,
and I'm trying to fix it, Will.

Wait, wait, Uncle Phil, no.

Geoffrey's eyebrows
just grew back

from the time you tried
to fix the stove, man.

Philip, drop the wrench
and step away from the sink.

Why does everybody act
like I'm dangerous

when I'm trying to fix
something?

Have you forgotten the
toaster
incident, sweetie?

Geoffrey hasn't.



How was I supposed to know
a piece of whole wheat

would scratch a man's cornea?

Besides, I know plumbing.

Certainly got
the pants for it.

- I'm calling the plumber.
- I'm calling the tailor.

Hello? Hello? Philip, did you do
something to the phone?

Oh, there was a little
static on the line

so I did a little rewiring.

Honey, there's no dial tone.

There's no static, either.

Here's the keys
to your car, Aunt Viv.

- Thanks for letting me use it.
- You're welcome, baby.

When are you gonna get
your car fixed?

Oh, I don't have to.



I'm gonna win a brand-new
Corvette on this game show.

Oh, yeah, right.

Right after your Uncle
Philip
repairs something

that doesn't send Geoffrey
to the emergency room.

No, seriously, Aunt Viv.

They were recruiting
down at the mall.

I'm gonna be on the game show,
"Double Trouble."

- You're gonna be on TV?
- Yeah.

Oh, Will, that is so
exciting.
Alright!

[loud clattering]

Oh-oh.

Alright.
Aunt Viv, I'll push

and if you Spackle real fast,
we could probably wall him in.

♪ Now this is a story ♪

♪ All about how my life
got flipped ♪

♪ Turned upside-down ♪

♪ And I'd like to take a minute
just sit right there ♪

♪ I'll tell you
how I became the prince ♪

♪ Of a town called Bel-Air ♪

♪ In West Philadelphia,
born and raised ♪

♪ On the playground is where
I spent most of my days ♪

♪ Chillin' out, maxin'
relaxing all cool ♪

♪ And all shootin' some b-ball
outside of the school ♪

♪ When a couple of guys
who were up to no good ♪

♪ Started makin' trouble
in my neighborhood ♪

♪ I got in one little fight
and my mom got scared ♪

♪ And said you're moving
with your auntie ♪

♪ And uncle in Bel-Air ♪

♪ I whistled for a cab
and when it came near ♪

♪ The license plate said fresh
and it had dice in the mirror ♪

♪ If anything I can say
that this cab was rare ♪

♪ But I thought
nah forget it ♪

♪ Yo homes to Bel-Air ♪

♪ I pulled up to a house
about seven or eight ♪

♪ And I yelled
to the cabbie ♪

♪ Yo homes smell you later ♪

♪ I looked at my kingdom
I was finally there ♪

♪ To sit on my throne
as the prince of Bel-Air ♪

Well, I just called the
repairman from the car phone.

They can't come out
until tomorrow.

No phone service for 24 hours?
This is a nightmare.

I mean, it's like we've vanished
off the face of the Earth!

Don't be so dramatic,
Hilary.

Hey, she's not being dramatic.

Jimmie Walker's phone went out

for 24 hours in the late 70s

and, hey, well,
y'all know the rest.

The phones are still out.

Excuse my language, dad,
but it's got to be said..

I'm behind you, big guy.

Mom, Cathy's line is busy.

Can I have the keys
so I can drive the phone

over to her house?

Sure, honey, in four years.

I'm sure the phone will
still be broken.

Oh, yeah, that reminds me.

When I win that
brand-new Corvette

I'm gonna have
a phone on the dash

leather on the seats,
and Halle Berry on my lap.

I can't believe you're gonna be
on "Double Trouble."

"Double Trouble?"
Are you nuts?

You want to embarrass yourself
in front of the entire country

for a lifetime supply
of Alberto VO5?

What you talking about, man?
It ain't embarrassing.

All I gotta do is
answer a couple questions

and let my partner squirt
some stuff all over me.

Wasn't Jimmy Swaggart
just arrested for that?

So, who's gonna be
your partner?

Oh, Kellogg Leiberbaum. He's
the smartest dude in school.

He's gonna call me on
the car phone at 8:00.

That is, if Uncle Phil
don't try to fix it.

Well, that's it.

The next person
that mentions the phone

gets a boot in their behind.

Mr. Banks,
your phone is broken.

It occurs to me, this family's
got a lot to learn

about hospitality.

Hey, what's up, J?

I'm here to practice
for the game show.

Whoa, wait a minute, how do you
know I'm going on a game show?

From Willy at
Roscoe's Chicken 'n' Waffles.

He knows everything.

He's the source that revealed
that Mariah Carey's black.

- Jazz, hold up a second, man.
- Yo, Will.

- Yo, what's up, Ty?
- Bro.

- What's he doing here?
- No, what's he doing here?

Now y'all not still mad at each
other about the watch thing?

- Yo, he sold me a fake Rolex.
- You paid with a fake 20.

Alright, now first of all,
you should have known

that it was fake when you saw
that the warranty

was only for two hours.

And you should've known that the
Jackson on a 20 ain't Jermaine.

They all look alike to me.

Be that as it may,
when do we start

practicing for the game show?

- I'm his partner.
- I'm his partner.

What, wait, how does everybody
know I'm going on a game show?

Man, from Willy at
Roscoe's Chicken 'n'
Waffles.

He knows everything.

He's the source who revealed
Color Me Badd was white.

Look, so is it gonna be
me or him?

- I already got a partner.
- Who?

Kellogg Leiberbaum.
He's a dude from my school.

Yo, my bro, if you did have
to pick one of us..

Speaking hypodermically.

I don't have to, so I'm not
gonna choose. Alright?

Okay, okay, you know,
because I'm your best friend

I respect your decision.

Because I am your best friend.
Peace, my best friend.

Some best friend.

When you go to your car,
you gotta walk.

- What? Don't you?
- Please, watch this.

Yo, Mr. Banks,
my tubby judicial brother.

Man, there ain't no water
pressure.

Somebody in this house broke
the three-minute shower limit.

Obviously, it wasn't you.

Would you mind
standing downwind?

My fault, G.

I guess I got a, kind of,
Pepy Le Pew thing going here.

Morning.

Aunt Viv, can you please tell
Uncle Phil to call the plumber?

There's gotta be something
you can do, or not do.

Geoffrey, can I get
some coffee, please?

I'm working on it, madam.

Well, when will it be ready?

At this rate?

Oh, about the time
Queen Elizabeth

opens for Queen Latifah.

Mother, why can't daddy be like
other lawyers

and hire people and then sue
them for inferior work?

I mean, look at my hair.

It hasn't been washed
in 24 hours.

I can't possibly go to work
looking like this.

Man, you sure can't. You should
probably call in ugly.

Will, I hate to rain
on your fashion parade

but the Moms Mabley look
is definitely passy.

I was trying to take a shower

but there ain't no water
pressure 'cause somebody

broke the three-minute
shower limit.

- What?
- Don't give me that.

Look at these fingernails.
Look behind these ears.

How long did you bathe today,
young lady?

Seven minutes.

I'm sorry,
but I had to wash.

I have enough problems.
I'm going through

puberty for God's sake.

Good morning, everyone.

Hey, Aunt Viv,
I'm telling you

if we band together
we can take him.

Leave him alone, honey,
he's mine.

Philip, baby

if Mr. Goodwrench wants
to visit Mrs. Toolbox

he'd better get
Mr. Water running.

Carlton, get the Yellow Pages.

(man on TV)
'And now it's time for America's
messiest, winningest program'

'"Double Trouble!"'

- My brother.
- Yo, what's up, J?

Oh. I see you're watching
"Double Trouble"

a show both salubrious
and sudorific.

For you, in recognition
of our salubrious

and sudorific friendship.

You got a little salube
on the side of your lip, too.

What's this?

That's me.

Yo, Will.

- 'Hey, what's up, Ty?'
- Nice weather we're having.

Guess that's 'cause we're
the third planet from the sun.

Unlike Mercury, where the
surface is perpetually molten.

For you.

I appreciate the gifts, fellas,
but, you know

I think I still want to see
other people.

Oh, look, a little nasty piece
of carpet with a vest.

Will, this is Winky.
Winky, Will.

Where'd you get
a stupid name like Winky?

Man, Winky was
my father's name.

Will, could you
tell this sucker

to take his sack of lint
and beat it?

Me and you gotta practice
for the game show.

Look, Will needs a partner
who knows his trivia

and no one's more
trivial than me.

Oh, yeah? What Will needs
is intellectual capacitance.

Alright. Look, I already told
you. Leiberbaum is my partner.

- Master William?
- Yo, what's up, G?

Young Leiberbaum stopped by
on his way to the airport.

- What? Where's he going?
- He wouldn't say.

It appears he's been
getting notes warning him

to get out of town.

Come on, how y'all gonna
play Leiberbaum?

Man, this is just
a stupid game show.

There's more at stake here than
a stupid game show, my brother.

That's right, our friendship's
on the line.

Come on,
pick your best friend.

Yeah, go ahead, Will, tell him.

Who's gonna be your partner?

Alright, I pick..

I pick Carlton.

Carlton is your partner?

Yeah, what he got
I ain't got?

On a straight up tip,
y'all, see

Carlton got this
rare disease, right?

And to go on this game show
was his last desperate wish

before he takes
that old dirt nap.

That's decent, Will.

- What he got?
- Um, he got..

He got Bette Davis eyes.

Will, can I borrow
your Walkman?

I'm going out
for a five-mile run.

- Yo, this don't sound right.
- You call yourself a friend.

Alright, so I lied. But, come
on, y'all, I wanna win that car!

I mean, and to win on these
game shows you gotta be

you know, Carlton-like.

- I don't get it.
- His point exactly.

You see, what Will is
trying to say is

and let me choose
my words carefully

you guys are stupid.

Look, that is not what
I'm trying to say.

Look, it's like this, y'all.

It's like, with Carlton..

Carlton, who is
Captain Kangaroo's friend?

Mr. Green Jeans.

- Players on a cricket team?
- Eleven.

- Letters not on a phone dial?
- Q and Z.

- Best picture, 1936?
- "The Great Ziegfeld."

- Third wife of Julius Caesar?
- Calpurnia.

You see?

Yeah-yeah, I see.
You think we're stupid.

Well, I guess
I better be going

but I guess I'm too stupid
to find the door.

That's right. I guess if we
put our brains together

we could find our way out.

And by the way, can you remind
me when to breathe?

What just happened here,
man?

I sacrificed my two best friends
for a stupid convertible.

Yeah, well..

The wind in my face
will dry my tears.

- Good luck.
- Wait, wait, hold up.

- You ain't gonna help me out?
- Certainly not.

You have little to lose
from public humiliation.

I, on the other hand,
have a future.

In eight years,
I graduate from Harvard Law

and begin clerkship
with Clarence Thomas.

Only someone with the highest
dignity will be considered.

Yeah, or a real tight butt.

Either way,
I'm in pretty good shape.

So, Carlton, what?
You want me to beg? Is that it?

I'm not sure.
Try and we'll see.

Okay. I beg you to remember
last Saturday night

when you got home
around 10:00 and

your drawers ain't get here
till the next morning.

Let the games begin.

(male #1)
In five, four, three, two.

Ladies and gentlemen,
Bob Eubanks!

Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

Thank you very much.
Hello, everybody. Thank you.

And welcome back
to another edition of

(audience)
'"Double Trouble!"'

Alright, let's jump right into
it and meet our first team.

This guy likes music,
basketball, and girls

and not necessarily
in that order.

He's a native of
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania.

Welcome Will Smith!

Now, Will's partner is Bel-Air,
California, born and bred.

He's a fan of Tom Jones

mutual funds,
and capital punishment.

Say hello to Carlton Banks.

Will and Carlton,
nice to have you with us.

Okay, let's meet
their opponents now.

This fellow says he's into
frozen pizza

"Laverne & Shirley" reruns

and I want you to meet
LA's oldest 10th grader.

His name is Tyriq Johnson!

Tyriq's partner is a brain
surgeon who still finds time

to date the salubrious
Whitney Houston.

Let's have a warm
"Double Trouble" welcome

for Dr. Jazzy Jeff

M.D., Ph.D. and O.P.P.

What the hell are they
doing here?

And how long has he been
dating Whitney Houston?

Okay, here's how we play
"Double Trouble."

Contestants win points
for answering trivia questions.

Now, at the end of
the question round

the contestants compete
in a physical stunt.

Hey, and audience, what kind of
stunts do we have here

on "Double Trouble?"

(audience)
'Stupid!'

That's right, so sit tight.

We'll be right back in just a
moment with our first round.

And we're clear.

Hey, fellas,
it worked out perfect, right?

We all got to be on the show!

Have we met?

Or am I too stupid
to remember?

Jazz, I think that's
that backstabbing Smith boy.

Oops, time to breathe again.

Oh, it's like that?

Well, look, at least
one of us will win the car

and when I do,
you guys can grab a bus

and meet me at the beach.

Come on.
Places.

Three, two..

Okay, it's time for
the trivia round

and here's our first question.

Everybody ready? Here we go.

"What famous
cartoon character

soared to fame
on his oversized ears?"

- 'Carlton.'
- That's an easy one, Bob.

The beloved pachyderm in
question won our young
hearts

by turning a handicap into--

[buzzer beeping]

I'm sorry. Time is up.
Let's go to your opponents.

Answer, dumbo.

(Bob)
'Dumbo's the correct answer.'

'You got that for 100 points.'

Okay, here we go again.
Hands on your buzzers.

Next question, tell me

"What is the capital of Ohio?"

(Bob)
'Tyriq?'

That would be the capital
"O," Bob.

"O?"

Yeah,
that's right, Bob, Ohio.

You know, capital "O,"
little "H"

Do I have to spell
the whole thing?

I guess I didn't say
"Capital city."

I'll have to get
a ruling from our judges.

Judges, what do you say?

'Sounds like the judges
are accepting that answer.'

Sounds like the judges
drank their lunch.

Okay, Tyriq and Jazz, you're
well out in front

you've got 200 points.

It's time now
for our final question

of the round
and here it is.

"The rain in Spain
stays mainly, where?"

'Carlton.'

Actually, Bob,
the rainfall

in the Pyrenees Mountains
of Spain

falls at a whopping--

In the plains, Bob!

(Bob)
'"In the plains."
Yes, that's right.'

'You got it for 100 points.'

Okay, that concludes our
question round.

I want you to sit tight
and find out what kind of

a fine mess these folks have
gotten themselves into

when we come back
for our stunt round

on "Double Trouble."
We'll be right back for that.

Welcome back. We've cooked up a
real doozy this time, folks.

So let's get our contestants out
here right now. Come on, guys.

Okay, contestants, now you know
what you have to do.

You have a minute-and-a-half
to do it.

So I want you to get on your
bicycles and act stupid.

Now it's time for the final
round of "Double Trouble"

and let's find out
just how well our contestants

know their partners
and here's how it works.

While Will and Jazz are in
the soundproof booth

we're gonna ask their partners
a question about them.

So, Will and Jazz,
if you would please

take your places in our
soundproof booth.

Wait.
That joint ain't gonna fill up

with water or nothing, Bob,
is it?

Not this week.
Go ahead.

Alright now, Carlton and Tyriq,
here's your question.

If your partner could name only
one person as his best friend

who would that
special person be?

Now you have until the buzzer
sounds to think about it.

Time is up. Alright, Carlton,
let's hear your answer.

Well, Bob,
let's back it up for a moment

and define this thing
called friendship.

You see, the ancient Mayans--

[buzzer beeping]

Carlton, your time is up.

Okay, Tyriq

'who is Jazz's best friend?'

I'm sorry, Bob,
this is a bad time.

All I gotta do is
answer a couple questions

and let my partner
squirt some stuff at me.

Sorry.

I guess you're reading
something really good.

Wasn't Jim Swaggart

Wasn't Jimmy Swaggart
arrested for that?

Great line reading.

I tried. What? No. Yeah, I'm
fine. Just let me..

Okay, I'm fine.