The Fall Guy (1981–1986): Season 1, Episode 15 - Ladies on the Ropes - full transcript

♪ WELL, I'M NOT THE
KIND TO KISS AND TELL ♪

♪ BUT I'VE BEEN
SEEN WITH FARRAH ♪

♪ I'VE NEVER BEEN
WITH ANYTHING LESS ♪

♪ THAN A NINE SO FINE ♪

♪ I'VE BEEN ON FIRE
WITH SALLY FIELD ♪

♪ GONE FAST WITH
A GIRL NAMED BO ♪

♪ BUT SOMEHOW THEY
JUST DON'T END UP AS MINE ♪

♪ IT'S A DEATH-DEFYIN'
LIFE I LEAD ♪

♪ I TAKE MY CHANCES ♪

♪ I DIE FOR A LIVIN' IN
THE MOVIES AND TV ♪

[Siren Wailing]



♪ BUT THE HARDEST
THING I EVER DO ♪

♪ IS WATCH MY LEADING LADIES ♪

♪ KISS SOME OTHER GUY
WHILE I'M BANDAGIN' MY KNEE ♪

♪ I MIGHT FALL FROM
A TALL BUILDIN' ♪

♪ I MIGHT ROLL A BRAND-NEW CAR ♪

♪ 'CAUSE I'M THE
UNKNOWN STUNTMAN ♪

♪ THAT MADE
REDFORD SUCH A STAR ♪

♪♪ [Women Vocalizing]

♪ I'VE NEVER SPENT
MUCH TIME IN SCHOOL ♪

♪ BUT I'VE TAUGHT
LADIES PLENTY ♪

♪ IT'S TRUE I HIRE MY
BODY OUT FOR PAY ♪

♪ HEY, HEY ♪

♪ I'VE GOTTEN BURNED
OVER CHERYL TIEGS ♪

♪ BLOWN UP FOR RAQUEL WELCH ♪



♪ BUT WHEN I WIND UP IN
THE HAY, IT'S ONLY HAY ♪

♪ HEY, HEY ♪

♪ I MIGHT JUMP AN
OPEN DRAWBRIDGE ♪

♪ OR TARZAN FROM A VINE ♪

♪ 'CAUSE I'M THE
UNKNOWN STUNTMAN ♪

♪ THAT MAKES EASTWOOD
LOOK SO FINE ♪♪

[Colt Narrating] THIS IS THE STORY OF
ONE OF AMERICA'S GREAT UNSUNG HEROES.

I MEAN, YOU'VE SEEN HIM, BUT
YOU NEVER KNEW WHO HE WAS.

YOU'VE CHEERED FOR
HIM AND CRIED FOR HIM,

WOMEN HAVE WANTED
TO DIE FOR HIM.

BUT DID HE EVER GET ANY
CREDIT? OR THE GIRL? NO.

HE WAS WHAT WE CALL A STUNTMAN.

AND THE REASON I'M TALKIN'
SO FONDLY ABOUT HIM IS...

WELL, BECAUSE IT'S
ME, COLT SEAVERS.

ANYWAY, PICTURE WORK ISN'T
WALL-TO-WALL EMPLOYMENT.

SO MAYBE YOU WONDER HOW A
GUY KEEPS HIS HEAD TOGETHER.

WELL, ONE WAY IS TO
WAIT BY THE PHONE...

AND WAIT... AND WAIT.

THE OTHER IS TO TAKE AN OCCASIONAL
JOB FOR THE COURT SYSTEM...

OF THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA,

WHERE A MAN IS CONSIDERED
INNOCENT UNTIL PROVEN GUILTY.

UNFORTUNATELY, SOMETIMES
A LOT OF THESE PEOPLE...

GET OUT OF JAIL ON
WHAT WE CALL BAIL.

AND THEY RUN LIKE HELL.

THAT'S WHERE I COME IN. I SOMETIMES
PICK UP RENT MONEY TRYIN' TO FIND THEM...

AND BRING THEM BACK TO JUSTICE.

BUT SOMETIMES IN MY MOVIE STUNTS,
THE COPS TRY TO BRING ME BACK TO JUSTICE.

[Siren Wailing]

[Siren Stops]

[Siren Wailing]

[Whistle Blowing]

[Siren Wailing, Distorted] [Howie]
WAS THAT GREAT OR WHAT?

NOT BAD, EVEN IF I
HAVE TO SAY SO MYSELF.

HEY, I MEAN FOR MY FIRST BIG
STUNT JOB, I THINK I DID TERRIFIC.

UH, HOWIE, WHAT DID YOU DO? I
MEAN, COLT WAS DRIVING THE CAR.

WELL, I WAS THE GUY IN
THE LIFEGUARD STAND.

[Gasps] OH. YEAH. OH.
YOU WERE TERRIFIC.

WOULD YOU LIKE TO SEE IT AGAIN?

HOWIE, WE'VE SEEN IT 10 TIMES.

TWELVE TIMES, BUT
WHO'S COUNTIN'?

GO AHEAD, KID. RUN IT
AGAIN. [Tape Rewinding]

[Phone Rings]

[Big Jack] HELLO. [Man]
SWEETHEART, HOW ARE YA?

- WHO IS THIS?
- EDDIE ARTIST.

EDDIE! I'VE BEEN
TRYING TO REACH YOU.

THEY CHANGED THE TIME OF YOUR
SENTENCING UNTIL THIS AFTERNOON.

YEAH, IT DOESN'T MAKE ANY
DIFFERENCE. WHAT DO YOU MEAN?

- I CAN'T MAKE IT.
- WHAT?

WELL, YOU KNOW, CONSIDERING
MY RELATIONSHIP WITH YOUR FATHER,

I THOUGHT I'D DO THE RIGHT
THING AND GIVE YOU A CALL.

EDDIE, THE RIGHT THING IS FOR YOU
TO SHOW UP FOR YOUR SENTENCING.

YOU WOULDN'T WANT ME TO GO TO JAIL
FOR SOMETHING I DIDN'T DO, WOULD YA?

- I DIDN'T EMBEZZLE ANY MONEY.
- EDDIE, YOU HAD A FAIR TRIAL,
AND YOU WERE FOUND GUILTY.

FAIR TRIAL? SAMANTHA,
HONEY, GROW UP.

MY COURT-APPOINTED LAWYER SPENT
AS MUCH TIME PREPARING MY CASE...

AS AL CAPONE SPENT ON
HIS INCOME TAX RETURN.

EDDIE...

YOU'RE A SMART LADY.
YOU KNOW I'M INNOCENT.

EDDIE, IT DOESN'T
MATTER IF I DO OR NOT.

SEE? YOU BELIEVE IN ME.

I MEAN, JUST TRUST
ME FOR A FEW DAYS. NO.

HONEY, LISTEN. I'LL
BE THERE. I PROMISE.

YOU'RE ADORABLE.
I LOVE YA. I LOVE YA.

[Dial Tone] EDDIE?

[Racquetball Ricocheting]

THAT'S 20-19. ONE MORE POINT.

THIS IS GONNA BE THE FIRST
TIME I'VE EVER BEATEN YOU.

YOU AIN'T BEATEN
ME YET. I'VE JUST BEEN

LEADING YOU ON ANYWAY,
TAKIN' IT EASY ON YOU.

WE'LL SEE ABOUT THAT.

YEAH, WELL, SERVE IT UP.

COLT.

I WON! I WON! [Laughing]

- I WON!
- I HAVE TO TALK TO YOU.

[Laughs]

HIS NAME IS EDDIE ARTIST.

HE WAS FOUND GUILTY FOR EMBEZZLING
$10,000 THROUGH A FORMER EMPLOYEE.

HE PHONED ME THIS MORNING AND TOLD ME
HE WASN'T SHOWING UP FOR HIS SENTENCING.

HE CALLED YOU? MM-HMM.
HE'S REALLY NOT A BAD SORT.

I KIND OF INHERITED
HIM WITH THE BUSINESS.

HE WAS ONE OF MY DAD'S
STEADIEST CUSTOMERS.

BUT HE ALWAYS SHOWED
UP. BUT NOT THIS TIME.

[Sighs] WELL, HE ASKED IF
I COULD WAIT A FEW DAYS,

AND THEN HE'D TURN HIMSELF
IN. BUT YOU DON'T TRUST HIM?

WELL, MY DAD TRUSTED
HIM, BUT I DON'T KNOW.

IF YOU WANT US TO PICK
HIM UP, WE'LL PICK HIM UP.

HEY, I HATE TO BE THE ONE
TO ASK THE OBVIOUS, BUT, UH,

DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA WHERE
WE COULD FIND THIS GUY?

I CHECKED HIS ADDRESS, BUT
HE DOESN'T LIVE THERE ANYMORE.

BUT I DO KNOW ONE THING
THAT MIGHT HELP YOU.

HE'S ALWAYS WORKED
AS A FIGHT TRAINER.

[Clears Throat]
WELL, IT'S A LEAD.

NOT A VERY GOOD
LEAD, BUT A LEAD.

[Howie] WHAT ARE WE
DOING IN THIS PARK?

[Colt] THIS IS WHERE
WE FIND ALGEBRA JONES.

[Colt] THERE HE IS.

[Grunting]

HEY, ALGEBRA. HOW YOU DOIN'?

HEY. SEAVERS.

I'VE BEEN HOPIN'
I'D RUN INTO YOU.

- [Screams]
- HEY, MAN. WHAT ARE YOU DOIN'?

BACK OFF! OH, IT'S
OKAY, HOWIE. HOWIE.

ALGEBRA AND I... WE'RE...
[Coughs] OLD FRIENDS.

YEAH, I CAN TELL.
OLD FRIENDS, HUH?

NOT AFTER WHAT YOU DID TO
ME. YOU DIDN'T HAVE TO TAKE ME IN.

WAIT A MINUTE. I DIDN'T MAKE
YOU STICK UP THAT GAS STATION.

BESIDES, GOING TO PRISON WAS THE
BEST THING THAT HAPPENED TO YOU.

WHAT? WELL, THINK ABOUT IT.

IF YOU HADN'T HAVE GONE TO PRISON,
YOU'D HAVE NEVER LEARNED HOW TO BOX.

I'M A PRO NOW.

YEAH, I KNOW. I KNOW. AND
I... AND I'M DAMN PROUD OF IT.

WE GOT SEATS FOR YOUR
FIGHT SATURDAY NIGHT. YEAH.

REALLY? YEAH. RINGSIDE.

WELL, YOU'LL GET YOUR MONEY'S
WORTH. I'M A CONTENDER NOW.

SEE? AND YOU SAY
THAT YOU DON'T OWE ME.

I PRACTICALLY STARTED YOUR CAREER.
WHEN I MET YOU, YOU WERE A LOUSY...

GOOD STREET FIGHTER.

I MEAN, NOW LOOK AT YOU. YOU'RE A
CONTENDER. WELL, NOBODY HELPED ME.

I DID IT ALL MYSELF. I WORKED
HARD AND LONG ON MYSELF,

AND I MADE SOMETHING
OF MYSELF, BY MYSELF!

NO QUESTION ABOUT IT, ALGEBRA. I MEAN, YOU
ARE A DIFFERENT MAN THAN THE ONE I CAUGHT.

OKAY, SEAVERS. I'M GONNA HELP YOU
OUT... THIS TIME. NOW, WHAT DO YOU WANT?

I'M LOOKIN' FOR A FIGHT
TRAINER NAMED EDDIE ARTIST.

EDDIE ARTIST AIN'T NO FIGHT
TRAINER. HE'S A MANAGER.

AND HE DOESN'T MANAGE FIGHTERS. HE
MANAGES WRESTLERS! LADY WRESTLERS!

WHERE CAN I FIND HIM?

WHERE LADY WRESTLERS
WORK OUT: SALLY'S GYM.

YOU FIXED THE BOOKS SO IT
LOOKS LIKE I EMBEZZLED THE MONEY,

THEN YOU GET YOUR HANDS
ON MY FALLING STARS... YEAH.

I'M GONNA MAKE YOU A BETTER
OFFER THAN THE LAST TIME.

I'M GONNA LAY 20 GRAND ON
YOU FOR YOUR GIRLS' CONTRACT.

LAY THE 20 GRAND ON YOU, AND I WON'T
SAY A WORD UNTIL AFTER THE FIGHT'S OVER.

YOU TAKE THAT MONEY, AND
YOU BET IT ON THE ROCKETS.

WHY SHOULD I BET
IT ON THE ROCKETS?

BECAUSE YOU'RE
GONNA TELL YOUR GIRLS...

THEY DON'T FEEL SO GOOD,
THEY SHOULD LOSE THE FIGHT.

THESE KIDS WON'T THROW A FIGHT.

OH, YES, THEY WOULD,
EDDIE... FOR YOU.

I'LL TELL YOU WHAT. RICCO, WHY DON'T WE
LET THE GIRLS DECIDE THEIR OWN FUTURE, HUH?

GIRLS, COULD YOU COME
HERE A MINUTE, PLEASE?

NOW, MR. RICCO HERE WOULD LIKE
TO BUY YOUR CONTRACTS. [Scoffs]

- WHAT DO YOU SAY?
- YEAH. WHAT'S THE VERDICT,
LADIES?

ARE YOU KIDDING?

WHY WOULD WE LEAVE A NICE
GUY LIKE EDDIE FOR A BUM LIKE YOU?

OH, MARIE. DON'T CALL
MR. RICCO A NAME LIKE THAT.

THERE ARE BETTER ONES,
LIKE "SWINE" OR "LEECH."

YOU GOT TWO DREAMBOATS HERE.
I MEAN, THEY'RE SWEETHEARTS.

AND YOU'VE GOT 24 HOURS
TO GET SMART, EDDIE.

WHY DON'T YOU GROW A
BRAIN, HUH? I'LL WORK ON IT.

HOW COULD RICCO POSSIBLY THINK
HE COULD STILL GET OUR CONTRACT?

DOESN'T HE KNOW YOU
ONLY GOT PROBATION TODAY?

YOU DID GET
PROBATION? NO HITCHES?

NO HITCHES. RICCO IS THE
KIND OF A GUY HATES TO LOSE.

WELL, YOU BETTER
BE A LITTLE CAUTIOUS...

'CAUSE THINGS MIGHT
GET ROUGH FOR ALL OF US.

JUST LET HIM TRY SOMETHING.

YEAH. WE'LL PUT HIM AND
HIS WHOLE GANG IN TRACTION.

HAVE YOU EVER SEEN A LADY
WRESTLER? WELL, NOT CLOSE-UP.

THEY'RE BIG, FAT AND
USUALLY MEAN. YEAH.

KIND OF LIKE THESE TWO?

HELLO, LADIES.

THOSE TWO CAN'T BE WRESTLERS.

HEY. THEY MIGHT BE RICCO'S MEN.

COULD YOU TELL US WHERE
WE COULD FIND... EDDIE ARTIST?

WELL, HOW YOU DOIN',
EDDIE? EDDIE? I'M NOT EDDIE.

COME ON. LET'S GO.

HEY, WAIT A MINUTE. DID
RICCO SEND YOU GUYS?

- NO. BIG JACK SENT US.
- BIG JACK?

I DON'T KNOW ANY BIG
JACK. CUT THE ACT, EDDIE.

BIG JACK SHOWED
US YOUR MUG SHOTS.

OH, MY BOND LADY.

- SHE SAID I COULD HAVE A FEW
DAYS TO TAKE CARE OF THINGS.
- UH-UH.

YOU ASKED FOR A FEW
DAYS, AND SHE SAID NO.

WAIT A MINUTE. I'M A GOOD
FRIEND OF HER FATHER'S.

WELL, HER FATHER'S DEAD. BIG
JACK RUNS THE BUSINESS NOW.

SHE DOESN'T TAKE KINDLY TO PEOPLE
WHO SKIP OUT ON HER. IT JUST ISN'T NICE.

YOU KNOW...

LISTEN. WE CAN COME TO
SOME ARRANGEMENT, RIGHT?

MAKE YOUR ARRANGEMENTS
WITH BIG JACK. SHE OWNS YOU.

YEAH, WELL, I DON'T CARE ABOUT
MYSELF. IT'S ABOUT MY GIRLS.

- THEY NEED ME.
- [Colt's Voice] THE GIRLS
COULD TAKE CARE OF THEMSELVES.

HEY!

[Shouts]

NOW DO YOU GUYS
WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT?

HUH?

OW. OH, SORRY.

WE'RE REALLY SORRY. WE
THOUGHT YOU WERE RICCO'S MEN.

RICCO? ISN'T THAT THE GUY
THAT YOU... YOU EMBEZZLED FROM?

I DIDN'T EMBEZZLE FROM
ANYBODY. RICCO FRAMED ME.

THAT'S NOT YOUR PROBLEM. IF YOU
GUYS ARE READY TO BRING ME IN, LET'S GO.

I'LL BE WITH YOU GIRLS
AT CHAMPIONSHIP.

NOT IN PERSON. IN SPIRIT.

WE CAN'T WIN WITHOUT YOU THERE.

EDDIE, YOU MAKE ME SO MAD. WHY
DIDN'T YOU GO TO YOUR SENTENCING?

THAT'S A GOOD QUESTION. I MIGHT HAVE
WENT TO PRISON IF I WENT TO MY SENTENCING.

AND I WOULDN'T BE HERE FOR THE MATCH.
ALL I NEEDED WAS A COUPLE EXTRA DAYS.

WHAT GOOD IS MORE
TIME GONNA DO YA?

YEAH. IT'S NOT GONNA HELP YOUR CHANCES
IF YOU DON'T SHOW UP FOR SENTENCING.

I DON'T CARE ABOUT MYSELF. I WANT
THESE GIRLS TO WIN THE CHAMPIONSHIP.

TRUE...

EXTRA PRIZE MONEY, I MIGHT
BE ABLE TO GET AN APPEAL.

AND, UH, I ALSO HAVE A WAY OF
MAYBE PROVING MY INNOCENCE.

- HOW?
- RICCO KEPT TWO SETS OF BOOKS...

ONE FOR HIS OWN PERSONAL USE
AND ONE FOR THE INTERNAL REVENUE.

THAT'S THE ONE HE USED TO DOCTOR UP
TO MAKE IT LOOK LIKE I STOLE THE MONEY.

IF YOU THINK YOU CAN GET HOLD OF THE
REAL BOOKS, YOU COULD CLEAR YOURSELF.

COLT, PLEASE DON'T TAKE HIM
IN. EDDIE MEANS TOO MUCH TO US.

HE'S ALL WE HAVE.

NEITHER MARIE OR I
EVER HAD A FAMILY.

WHEN EDDIE FOUND US, WE WERE WAITING
TABLES AT A TRUCK STOP IN KENTUCKY.

WE HAD NOTHING,
AND WE WERE NOTHING.

BUT THIS WEEKEND,
THANKS TO EDDIE,

WE MIGHT BE THE CHAMPIONS!

PLEASE, DON'T TAKE
THAT AWAY FROM US.

- HEY, WHAT'S A COUPLE OF DAYS?
- HE'S A CONVICTED FELON.

BUT HE'S INNOCENT.
YEAH. I SWEAR, COLT. I AM.

HE SWEARS IT.

- YOU SWEAR?
- YEAH. I SWEAR.

[Phone Rings]

- SAMANTHA JACK SPEAKING.
- HI, JACK. IT'S COLT.

HI, COLT. DID YOU FIND EDDIE?

IN A WAY, BUT THAT'S WHAT I
WANTED TO TALK TO YOU ABOUT.

COLT, THE ONLY THING
I WANT TO TALK TO YOU

ABOUT IS AT WHAT POLICE
STATION I CAN MEET YOU.

LOOK. ISN'T THERE ANY WAY YOU CAN
ARRANGE FOR EDDIE TO HAVE THOSE EXTRA DAYS?

WHAT DO YOU MEAN? HE WAS SUPPOSED
TO BE IN COURT THIS AFTERNOON.

YOU TOLD US THIS MORNING THAT
EDDIE WAS A REGULAR CUSTOMER...

OF YOUR FATHER'S,
AND HE NEVER SKIPPED.

WELL, I THINK HE MIGHT HAVE HAD A GOOD
REASON THIS TIME. WHAT DO YOU MEAN?

TWO WRESTLERS HE'S
MANAGING ARE FIGHTING FOR

THE CHAMPIONSHIP THIS
WEEKEND. THEY NEED HIM.

COLT, I'VE SEEN
THOSE WRESTLERS ON

TELEVISION, AND THOSE
GUYS DON'T NEED ANYBODY.

YEAH, WELL, TAKE MY WORD
FOR IT. THESE GUYS DO.

BESIDES, EDDIE JUST MIGHT BE INNOCENT. I
THINK I MIGHT BE ABLE TO HELP HIM PROVE IT.

ALL HE NEEDS IS TIME.
JUST THREE DAYS, JACK.

COLT, THE LAW IS THE LAW.

JACK, COME ON. FLASH THOSE BIG EYES
AT THE JUDGE. GET US A CONTINUANCE.

- THREE DAYS?
- THREE DAYS.

BUT YOU BETTER HAVE
HIM BACK IN BY THEN.

YOU CAN COUNT ON ME, JACK. I'LL
NEVER LET HIM OUT OF MY SIGHT.

YOU BETTER NOT.

WELL? WELL, YOU
GOT YOUR THREE DAYS.

BUT IN THAT TIME WE
GOTTA FIGURE OUT A WAY...

TO GET CLOSE ENOUGH TO
RICCO TO FIND HIS REAL BOOKS.

WHAT WE NEED IS A NEW
WRESTLING DISCOVERY FOR RICCO.

[Grunting]

[Colt] COME ON, KID. GET UP.
YOU'LL THROW HER NEXT TIME.

GET HER, KID. SHOW HER.

[Both Grunting]

[Screams]

WELL, SO MUCH FOR THAT IDEA.

HE CAN TAKE A GOOD FALL.

WHAT DO YOU EXPECT? [Grunts]

[Sighs] I'M A STUNTMAN.

UH, KID, SHOW HER THE MOVE I TAUGHT
YOU FOR THE EASTWOOD PICTURE.

I DON'T REMEMBER THAT ONE,
COLT. COME ON. I'LL SHOW YA.

[Groans] YOU REMEMBER. COME ON.

[Groans]

[Shouting]

NOT BAD. NOT BAD.

HEY, HEY. THAT GOOD
ENOUGH TO FOOL RICCO?

- UH...
- YEAH.

NOT RICCO. NO, YOU
MUST BE KIDDING.

KID, TRUST ME.

[Mutters]

[Both Grunting]

[Shouts]

[Man] GIVE HIM
ANOTHER ONE. THAT'S IT.

- [Shouts]
- HEY. YOU'RE THE KID THAT WANTS
TO BE THE WRESTLER, HUH?

- [Shouts] - [Howie] WELL,
UH, NOT NECESSARILY.

THAT IS, I... I
MEAN... UH, YES, SIR.

[Groaning] NO, I HAVE EXPERIENCE.
I WRESTLED IN COLLEGE.

COLLEGE, HUH? THAT'S WHERE YOU
LEARNED, RIGHT, RED? IN COLLEGE?

YEAH. YOU GOT IT.

TAKE YOUR CLOTHES
OFF, KID. WHAT?

TAKE YOUR SHIRT OFF. I
WANT TO SEE THE POWER.

- LOOKS PRETTY GOOD.
- [Both Laughing]

WHAT ARE YOU LAUGHING
AT? YOU'RE THE ANIMAL.

THIS KID'S NORMAL. COME ON. GET
YOUR SHIRT. TAKE A WALK WITH ME.

YOU SEE, WHAT THESE GUYS
DON'T UNDERSTAND IS PROMOTION.

PROMOTION. YEAH.

OH, THEY'VE GOT APPEAL... WITH CRAZY
LADIES, WINOS, OTHER ASSORTED LOWLIFE.

BUT WITH YOU... YOU AND
THE PROPER PROMOTION,

I CAN MAKE YOU A SUPERSTAR.

GREAT. UH, WHAT IS YOUR NAME?

HOWARD MUNSON. HOWARD MUNSON.

MOUNTAIN MUNSON! MOUNTAIN MUN...

NAH, YOU'RE NOT BIG ENOUGH.
I KNOW. UH, MIGHTY MUNSON.

MIGHTY MUNSON. THAT REMINDS ME
OF THAT MOUSE. I HATE THAT MOUSE.

HANDSOME HOWARD.
HANDSOME HOWARD.

AND YOU'LL WRESTLE
IN A TUXEDO. A TUXEDO?

I'M GONNA START YOU AGAINST...

KILLER TYPHOON IN
THIS ARENA... TONIGHT!

TONIGHT? DON'T I NEED SOME
TRAINING? LIKE A MONTH OR TWO?

NO, NO, NO. I'LL PUT THE FIX IN.

HE'LL THROW YOU, YOU'LL
THROW HIM, AND YOU'LL WIN.

ARE ALL THESE FIGHTS
FIXED LIKE THAT?

NOT THE CHAMPIONSHIP
ONE. BUT TONIGHT IS NOTHING.

NOTHING AT ALL. BESIDES,

KILLER FIGHTS SO DIRTY,

UGLY, NOBODY
WANTS TO SEE HIM WIN.

IT'S BAD BUSINESS WHEN HE WINS.

COME ON. I'LL SHOW YOU
YOUR LOCKER. COME ON.

I WONDER HOW HOWIE'S DOIN'.

WELL, HE CALLED EARLIER,
SAID HE HAD A BOUT TONIGHT.

I'D LIKE TO SEE THAT.
[Man] IT'S SHOWTIME!

COME ON. COME ON. ALL RIGHT. THANK
YOU VERY MUCH, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN.

WELCOME TO THE AUDITORIUM CLUB.

I WANT TO TELL YOU. TONIGHT
I AM ONE EXCITED GUY...

BECAUSE TONIGHT IS SOME
KIND OF SPECIAL NIGHT.

THE TWO LADY TAG TEAMS
THAT ARE GONNA BE FIGHTING

FOR THE WORLD CHAMPIONSHIP
TOMORROW NIGHT...

ARE GONNA HAVE A PRELIMINARY
GRUDGE MATCH RIGHT HERE ON OUR STAGE!

HOW ABOUT THAT? [Cheering]

ALL RIGHT. AND TO MAKE
SURE THESE YOUNG LADIES...

DON'T HURT THEMSELVES
BEFORE THE REAL FIGHT,

YOU HAVE NOTICED WE HAVE
FILLED OUR RING WITH REAL... GELATIN!

I'M TALKIN' ABOUT GRIMY, SLIMY,
GOOEY GELATIN! I THINK IT'S LEMON.

I DON'T LIKE THIS PROMOTIONAL
STUFF ANY MORE THAN YOU DO.

BUT IT BRINGS IN THE CROWDS.

THERE'S GONNA BE MEDIA COVERAGE.
I MEAN, IT'S GONNA GET MORE PEO...

MORE PEOPLE WILL COME
TO THE CHAMPIONSHIP.

HEY. WOULD I LET YOU GIRLS DO
ANYTHING THAT WOULD HURT YOUR CAREERS?

EDDIE. FIGHTING IN GELATIN?

YEAH. WAIT.

IF YOU GIRLS FEEL
THAT STRONG ABOUT IT,

JUST SAY THE WORD, I'LL
CANCEL THE WHOLE THING.

WELL, I... COME ON.

- YOU GUYS MEAN MORE TO ME THAN
SOME PROMOTIONAL GIMMICK.
- [Crowd Cheering]

YOU KNOW WHAT'S
BEST, EDDIE. YEAH.

IT'LL BE FUN.

EDDIE, WE WANT TO
TALK TO YOU... ALONE.

LATER. WE GOTTA GO IN.
THIS WON'T TAKE A MINUTE.

JUST A MINUTE.

GO AHEAD, GIRLS. I'LL BE THERE
BEFORE YOU GO IN THE RING.

- ARE YOU SURE IT'S ALL RIGHT?
- YEAH, YEAH. DON'T WORRY. [Chuckles]

LET'S GO.

[Announcer] LET'S HAVE A BIG ROUND OF
APPLAUSE AND BRING OUT OUR GIRLS! COME ON!

[Cheering]

MARIE.

WHERE'S EDDIE?

HE STOPPED TO TALK TO TWO
GUYS. HE SAID HE'D BE RIGHT IN.

TWO GUYS? I BETTER
SEE WHAT'S GOIN' ON.

[Announcer] LADIES AND GENTLEMEN,
WE'RE GONNA HAVE SOME FUN HERE TONIGHT.

GIRLS, IF YOU'LL PREPARE YOURSELF,
WE'LL GET READY TO GET STARTED.

ALL RIGHT. STAND BY,
BECAUSE IT'S COMING YOUR WAY!

ALL RIGHT, GIRLS. IF YOU'LL SHAKE
HANDS AND GO TO YOUR CORNERS,

MAY THE BEST TEAM WIN. HEY,
COLT! I'M BEING KIDNAPPED, COLT!

[Announcer] LET'S GET PHYSICAL!

- GO FOR IT!
- JACKIE'S IN! WENDY JUST PULLED JACKIE IN!

- HEY, THAT'S DIRTY POOL!
- [Shouting]

COME ON! OH! WHOO!
COME ON! GET HER!

POOR EDDIE.

THE REASON HE GOT IN THIS
MESS IN THE FIRST PLACE...

IS BECAUSE RICCO
WANTED OUR CONTRACTS.

YEAH. AND ALL EDDIE HAD
TO DO WAS GIVE IT TO HIM,

AND HE WOULD HAVE BEEN
OFF THE HOOK. BUT NOT EDDIE.

HE CARED TOO MUCH ABOUT
US TO TRY AND SAVE HIMSELF.

HEY, LOOK. DON'T
BLAME YOURSELVES.

THEY'LL PROBABLY JUST HOLD HIM
UNTIL THE CHAMPIONSHIP'S OVER.

YOU DON'T KNOW RICCO. HE
DOESN'T LIKE BEING DOUBLE-CROSSED.

HE'D THINK NOTHING
OF KILLING EDDIE.

NOTHING'S GONNA HAPPEN TO EDDIE.

I'LL FIND HIM... AND
BEFORE THE CHAMPIONSHIP.

- THAT'S TOMORROW NIGHT.
- HEY.

MAYBE HOWIE KNOWS SOMETHING.
HE'S IN WITH RICCO RIGHT NOW.

- OR HE MIGHT BE IN TROUBLE.
- WHAT DO YOU MEAN?

WHAT IF EDDIE CHICKENS OUT AND
STARTS TO TALK... ABOUT HOWIE?

OH, GOD. YOU'RE RIGHT.
HE'D BE A SITTING DUCK.

[Door Closes]

[Ricco] WHEN THE BOYS GRABBED THAT
EDDIE ARTIST IN THAT PHONY KIDNAPPING,

HE TOLD THEM THAT THIS MUNSON KID IS
WORKIN' UNDERCOVER FOR THE BOUNTY HUNTER.

YOU PASS THE WORD ON TO THE KILLER THAT I
WANT HIS FIRST FIGHT TO BE HIS LAST FIGHT.

UNTIL YOU COUNT THE MONEY, I
DON'T CARE IF IT'S YOUR OWN BROTHER.

YOU OPEN UP THE ENVELOPE, TAKE OUT
THE BILLS, YOU COUNT 'EM ONE AT A TIME.

HEY, HANDSOME.

WHAT ARE YOU DOING
SITTING IN THE DARK?

WELL, I LIKE TO MEDITATE
BEFORE A BIG MATCH.

HEY, I LIKE YOU, HANDSOME,
BUT I DON'T LIKE NOBODY...

SITTING AROUND MY
OFFICE WHEN I'M NOT HERE.

[Bell Dinging] LADIES
AND GENTLEMEN,

IN A MATCH THAT IS THE
BEST OF THREE FALLS,

LET ME INTRODUCE
THE CONTESTANTS.

IN THE FAR CORNER,

STANDING 7 FOOT 5 INCHES TALL,

WEIGHING 465 POUNDS,
KILLER TYPHOON!

[Crowd Booing]

YOU'RE A BUM, KILLER!
YOU'RE AN UGLY BUM!

[Booing Continues]

[Bell Dinging]

AND IN THE OTHER CORNER,

A NEWCOMER TO THE
SPORT OF WRESTLING,

IN HIS FIRST PROFESSIONAL BOUT,

WEIGHING IN AT 175
POUNDS, HANDSOME HOWARD!

[Cheering]

[Cheering Continues]
[No Audible Dialogue]

- [Whistling] - OKAY. COME ON
OVER HERE. COME ON. LET'S GO.

OKAY. I WANT A
GOOD, CLEAN FIGHT.

I WANT NO BITING, NO
GOUGING, NO CHOKING.

NOW SHAKE HANDS, GO
BACK TO YOUR CORNER,

COME OUT WRESTLING AT THE BELL.

[Crowd Booing]

COULD YOU GO A
LITTLE EASIER, KILLER?

I THINK I SHOULD BE
CONSCIOUS WHEN I WIN.

[Shouts]

[All Booing]

[Shouting]

KID, YOU OKAY? HE'S GETTING
THE STUFFIN' BEAT OUT OF HIM.

IT'S ALL RIGHT,
COLT. THE FIX IS IN.

SURE DOESN'T LOOK LIKE IT. YOU
BETTER GET OUT BEFORE YOU GET HURT.

IN A MINUTE IT'S GONNA BE
MY TURN TO TOSS HIM AROUND.

GIVE HIM THE "FALL GUY" DROP. LISTEN.
HE'LL BE LUCKY IF HE CAN DROP DEAD.

- DO YOU MIND?
- [Shouts]

ATTABOY, KID!

NOW THE DROP!

[Cheering]

[Booing]

I NEVER SAW ANYBODY
TAKE A BEATIN' LIKE THAT,

AND I'VE BEEN COMING
HERE FOR 20 YEARS.

HEY, CUT THAT OUT,
YOU BIG BUM, YOU!

A COUPLE MORE MINUTES LIKE THIS
AND HANDSOME HOWARD THERE'S...

GONNA LOOK LIKE
"HAMBURGER HOWARD."

COME ON!

YOU OKAY, KID? I CAN'T
MOVE MY LEG, COLT.

YOU CAN'T LET KILLER WIN.
GET BACK IN THERE AND FIGHT!

[Laughing] [Booing]

[Jody] CAREFUL.

EASY.

CAN I GET YOU A
PILLOW? OH, YEAH.

I THINK THAT'D MAKE MY
LEG FEEL A LOT BETTER.

- OOH, ARE YOU COMFORTABLE?
- [Sighs] AS COMFORTABLE AS I CAN BE.

- CAN I GET YOU A HEATING PAD?
- THAT'D BE NICE.

SORRY ABOUT THAT, KID.
THAT'S ALL RIGHT, COLT.

YOU COULDN'T HAVE KNOWN
THIS WAS GONNA HAPPEN.

BESIDES, WE'RE STUNTMEN,
RIGHT? PAIN IS OUR BUSINESS.

THEY WOULD HAVE HAD TO
TORTURE EDDIE TO MAKE HIM TALK.

[Jackie] COLT, HE COULD
BE IN SERIOUS TROUBLE.

[Howie] AND THE
CHAMPIONSHIP IS TONIGHT.

WHERE YOU GOING,
COLT? TO GET A PROP.

WHAT'S THAT?

I USED THIS TO DOUBLE JOE DON
BAKER IN THE MOVIE WALKING TALL.

I SAW THAT MOVIE. WELL, WHAT
ARE YOU GONNA DO WITH IT?

ASK MARIE. SHE SAW THE MOVIE.

IF I DON'T GET BACK BEFORE THE FIGHT, YOU
GO ON DOWN WITHOUT ME. I'LL MEET YOU THERE.

WHERE'S HE GOING?
MY GUESS IS RICCO'S.

[Phone Rings]

[TV: Tires Squealing]
MMM, VERY VIOLENT.

[Chuckles]

HELLO. EDDIE?

WHERE ARE YOU?

OH. YEAH, SURE.

YEAH. SURE.
JACKIE, IT'S FOR YOU.

EDDIE, ARE YOU ALL RIGHT?

OH, NO.

I KNOW. I KNOW. DON'T WORRY. WE'RE
NOT GONNA LET ANYTHING HAPPEN TO YOU.

WE LOVE YOU TOO.

BYE.

MARIE,

EDDIE SAID THAT IF WE DON'T THROW
THE FIGHT, THEY'RE GONNA KILL HIM.

YOU GUYS SHOULD HAVE
BEEN THERE. [Chuckles]

I SWEAR. HE MUST HAVE
THROWN THAT KID 60 FEET.

YEAH, I WISH I COULD HAVE
BEEN HERE. IT'S TOO BAD.

I COULD HAVE MADE A
LOT OF BUCKS ON THAT KID.

WHERE'S EDDIE ARTIST? GET HIM!

[Groans]

WHAT DO YOU WANT? LOOK, LOOK. WE
DON'T... WE DON'T KEEP NO CASH IN HERE.

- I WANT EDDIE ARTIST.
- I DON'T KNOW THE GUY.

EASY! NO, DON'T...

[Shouts] THOSE ARE ANTIQUES!

- I'M LOSING MY PATIENCE.
- ALL RIGHT. ALL RIGHT.

I KNOW THE GUY,
BUT I DON'T HAVE HIM.

- YOUR NOSE IS GROWIN'.
- NO! [Stammers]

[Shouts]

IT'S SIMPLE. YOU KIDNAPPED
EDDIE. I WANT HIM BACK.

- I DIDN'T KIDNAP NOBODY.
- YOU'RE NEXT.

OKAY, CALM DOWN! CALM DOWN!

I'LL TELL YOU WHAT
YOU WANT TO KNOW.

NOW THAT'S BETTER. LOOK,
EDDIE WASN'T KIDNAPPED.

IT WAS ALL A FAKE. IT WAS
A SCHEME HE COOKED UP...

TO GET AWAY FROM YOU
AND TO FOOL THE GIRLS.

YOU EXPECT ME TO BELIEVE THAT?

IT'S THE TRUTH. I SWEAR.

LOOK. I WANTED THE
GIRLS' CONTRACT,

BUT I WOULDN'T KIDNAP
SOMEBODY TO DO IT.

ANYWAY, LOOK. I... I
GOT THE CONTRACT.

HERE. SEE? I OWN 'EM.

I OWN 'EM. NOW, I MADE
A DEAL WITH EDDIE.

HE SELLS ME THE GIRLS, AND I KEEP
MY MOUTH SHUT UNTIL AFTER THE FIGHT.

NOW, HE TAKES MY MONEY,
AND HE BETS IT AGAINST THEM.

NOW, WILL YOU PUT DOWN THE CLUB?

WHAT? HE'S PLANNING
ON 'EM TO LOSE?

THAT'S THE WHOLE PURPOSE
BEHIND THIS FAKE KIDNAPPING.

THE GIRLS... THEY THINK
EDDIE'S IN TROUBLE.

SO, HE CALLS THEM UP, AND HE SAYS,
"GIRLS, YOU GOTTA THROW THIS FIGHT,

OR HE'S GONNA KILL ME."

RICCO'S GONNA KILL HIM.

NOW, THAT EDDIE'S SMART.

HE KNOWS THOSE GIRLS.
THEY WON'T LET HIM DIE.

AND HE SKIPS TOWN WITH
ALL THE MONEY. EDDIE...

HE'S A LOWLIFE.

HE'D SELL HIS OWN
MOTHER TO A CIRCUS.

YOU BOUGHT THE GIRLS' CONTRACT.
WHY DO YOU WANT 'EM TO LOSE?

I GOT A BIG BET DOWN MYSELF.
AND I GET THE REMATCH.

EDDIE'S NOT THE
ONLY LOWLIFE, RICCO.

AND BY THE WAY,
WHERE IS EDDIE HIDING?

I TOLD YOU. I DON'T KNOW
WHERE HE... I... I DON'T KNOW NOW.

BUT TONIGHT... HE'LL
BE AT SALLY'S GYM.

HE'S GOT A ROOM UPSTAIRS.

WELL, I WOULDN'T
TRY TO WARN EDDIE,

BECAUSE IF HE'S NOT WHERE
YOU SAY HE IS, I'M COMING BACK.

AND I'M BRINGIN' MY STICK.

SORRY, GUYS.

[Man Announcing] LADIES AND
GENTLEMEN, PLEASE REMEMBER...

THAT YOUR BEST CHANCE OF GETTING
GOOD SEATS FOR THIS FRIDAY'S EXHIBITION...

IS BY VISITING OUR
ADVANCE SALES WINDOW.

TICKETS WILL BE ON SALE AFTER
TONIGHT'S TAG TEAM MATCH.

WHAT DO YOU THINK
HAPPENED TO COLT?

DON'T WORRY. COLT'S
NEVER MISSED A CALL YET.

PLEASE, YOU GUYS, WHATEVER
YOU DO, DON'T THROW THE FIGHT.

COLT'S NOT GONNA LET ANYTHING HAPPEN
TO EDDIE. WE CAN'T TAKE THAT CHANCE.

EDDIE'S LIFE IS MORE
IMPORTANT THAN THIS MATCH.

HEY. HERE COMES
COLT NOW. OH, GOOD.

[Announcer] IMMEDIATELY
FOLLOWING TONIGHT'S MATCHES,

WE'LL BE HANDING OUT
COMPLIMENTARY TICKETS...

FOR THIS WEDNESDAY'S
AND THURSDAY'S...

HOW'D IT GO? JUST LIKE THE
MOVIE, AND I LEARNED PLENTY.

DID YOU TWO RECEIVE A CALL
FROM EDDIE? HOW DID YOU KNOW?

RICCO TOLD ME YOU WOULD.
THEY'RE GONNA KILL HIM, COLT.

AH, IT WAS A LIE. EDDIE
WASN'T EVEN KIDNAPPED.

IT WAS A BIG SCHEME HE COOKED
UP WITH RICCO. I DON'T BELIEVE THAT.

LOOK. I SAW YOUR CONTRACT.
RICCO HAS IT. EDDIE SOLD IT TO HIM.

EDDIE WOULDN'T DO THAT.
HONEY, I KNOW IT'S HARD TO BELIEVE,

BUT EDDIE TOOK THE MONEY HE GOT
FOR THE CONTRACT AND BET AGAINST YOU.

NOW I KNOW IT'S A LIE.

EDDIE CARES MORE ABOUT THIS
CHAMPIONSHIP THAN ANY MONEY.

I SAW THE CONTRACT,
JACKIE. RICCO OWNS YOU.

I MEAN, YOU THROW THIS FIGHT,
YOU'RE FALLING RIGHT INTO THEIR TRAP.

YOU DON'T KNOW RICCO, COLT. HE PROBABLY
JUST COOKED UP THIS LIE TO CON YOU.

BELIEVE ME, WHEN HE TOLD ME
THIS, HE WAS IN NO POSITION TO CON.

I'M SORRY. I'LL NEVER BELIEVE
THAT EDDIE SOLD US OUT.

I KNOW HE'S IN TERRIBLE TROUBLE, AND I'M
GONNA DO WHATEVER I CAN DO TO SAVE HIM.

WOULD YOU BELIEVE ME
IF I BROUGHT HIM DOWN

HERE TO SHOW YOU THAT
HE WASN'T BEING HELD?

[Announcer] LADIES AND
GENTLEMEN, THE FEATURE BOUT...

WELL, YEAH. I GUESS I'D
HAVE TO BELIEVE IT THEN.

ALL RIGHT. BUT DON'T DO
ANYTHING STUPID TILL I GET BACK.

COLT, THE MATCH
IS ABOUT TO START.

STALL, OKAY?

OKAY. THIS IS A
CHAMPIONSHIP FIGHT.

TWO OUT OF THREE FALLS. I
WANT A GOOD, CLEAN BOUT.

SHAKE HANDS, GO BACK TO YOUR
CORNER AND WAIT FOR THE BELL.

[Applause]

HERE SHE IS.

I'LL GO OVER AND GET HER.

IF SHE SEES ME COMING, SHE MAY
TRY TO RUN. SO STAY AWAKE. ALL RIGHT?

HEY, PARTNER. EVER
SEE ME SLEEP ON THE JOB?

NOT IN THE LAST HOUR ANYWAY.

HEY. WHAT THE
HELL'S GOIN' ON HERE?

BORROW YOUR CAR A LITTLE WHILE.

YOU'RE UNDER ARREST.
THIS IS A POLICE VEHICLE.

YOU'VE GOTTA BE KIDDING.

- [Tires Squealing]
- PULL OVER,
OR I'LL START GETTING NASTY.

I HAVEN'T GOT TIME TO PULL OVER.
I'M CHASING A CONVICTED FELON.

KEEP YOUR HANDS ON THE WHEEL.

I WORK FOR A BONDING COMPANY. I
WAS GONNA SHOW YOU A BOND RECEIPT.

OKAY, BUT YOU TAKE
IT OUT REAL SLOW.

[Bell Dings] [Cheering]

[Chattering]

OH! ALL RIGHT! ALL RIGHT! YEAH!

[Indistinct] YEAH.

[Man] DO YOU ALWAYS
DRIVE LIKE THIS?

DON'T WORRY. I'M A
STUNTMAN. WHAT A RELIEF.

- [Shouting] - [Jody]
WHOO! WHOO!

YEAH! COME ON! COME ON!

GOT A FLASHER IN
THIS THING? SURE.

HOW ABOUT A SIREN? OH, YEAH.

- WELL, HIT IT.
- [Siren Wailing]

[Crowd Booing]

[Jody] OH, SHE'S
THROWIN' IT AWAY!

[Booing Continues]

[Howie] JACKIE, DON'T
LET HER DO THAT TO YA.

[Marie] YOU GUYS DON'T UNDERSTAND.
SHE'S TAKIN' THIS BEATING FOR EDDIE.

I COULD HAVE GOTTEN OUT OF
THAT HOLD WITH MY HANDS TIED.

MARIE, YOU GOTTA
WIN THE SECOND FALL.

COLT'S GOTTA HAVE MORE TIME.

OKAY. WE'LL WIN THIS ONE.

BUT IF HE'S NOT BACK BY
THE THIRD FALL, WE'RE LOSING.

[Crowd Shouting]

GIVE HER THE FLYING MAT!

PIN HER DOWN! PIN HER! COME ON!

ONE, TWO...

[Crowd Shouting]

[Siren Wailing]

HEY. I ALWAYS WANTED
TO DO THIS FOR REAL.

RELAX. I DO THIS FOR A
LIVING. YOU CALL THIS LIVING?

NOW! TAG OUT!

THAT'S MORE LIKE IT!

JACKIE! JACKIE!

COME ON! YEAH! COME ON!

YOU GIVE UP? YOU
GIVE UP? YOU GIVE UP?

QUITS. THAT'S
ALL. CALL IT. YEAH!

NICE GOIN'! YEAH! YEAH!

[Siren Wailing]

[No Audible Dialogue]

I THINK WE LOST HIM.

[Sighs] HE'S GOTTA BE
AROUND HERE SOMEWHERE.

[Tires Squealing]

THAT'S HIM IN THE STORM DRAIN.
I HAD A FEELING HE'D SHOW UP.

[Siren Wailing]

[Man] THERE'S A BARRIER
UP AHEAD. YOU BETTER STOP.

I STOP, EDDIE'S GONNA GET AWAY. IF
YOU DON'T, WE'RE GONNA GET KILLED.

YOU'RE NOT!

I AM.

YOU DID.

GET ON THE RADIO AND
CALL US A SQUAD CAR.

RIGHT. WE'RE TAKING
HIM IN AND BOOKING HIM.

WRONG. WE'RE TAKING
HIM TO A WRESTLING MATCH.

[Crowd Booing, Shouting]

YOU CAN'T DO THAT!

JACKIE, COLT'S HERE.

[Marie] EDDIE, TELL ME
YOU DIDN'T SELL US OUT.

EDDIE, YOU STINK.

[Crowd Booing]

TAG ME, JACKIE!

JACKIE!

YEAH, YEAH, YEAH!

[Crowd Cheering]

YEAH! PIN HER!

THAT'S GOOD! THAT'S GOOD!

HAD ENOUGH? NO!

[Screaming]

HAD ENOUGH? STOP! I GIVE UP!

[Bell Dings] [Cheering]

THE NEW CHAMPS,
THE FALLING STARS!

I CAN'T BELIEVE HOW MUCH
MY ANKLE ITCHES. [Chattering]

WELL, WHERE HAVE YOU THREE BEEN?

COLT GOT US A NEW MANAGER.

AN HONEST ONE. HIS
NAME'S HENRY THOMAS.

YEP. HE SET UP A ROUND-THE-WORLD
TOUR FOR JACKIE AND MARIE.

- THEY LEAVE NEXT WEEK.
- THAT'S TERRIFIC.

WOW. AROUND THE WORLD.
SOME PEOPLE GET ALL THE LUCK.

TELL HIM, COLT.

WELL, HOWIE, UH, HENRY WANTS
YOU TO GO ON THE TOUR ALSO.

WHAT? ME?

AROUND THE WORLD?
ARE YOU KIDDING?

HE SAW YOU AS HANDSOME HOWARD
AND THOUGHT YOU WERE TERRIFIC.

- WELL, I WAS PRETTY GOOD.
- YEAH. YOU AND KILLER.

YOU'RE GONNA BE
OUR OPENING BOUT.

KILLER?

YEAH. BUT DON'T WORRY. IT'S JUST
FOR EXHIBITION. IT'S GONNA BE FIXED.

WELL, I SHOULD HOPE SO.

YOU GO FIRST-CLASS, ALL EXPENSES
PAID, AND YOU GET A GRAND A WEEK.

A GRAND A WEEK? BUT
YOU'RE SURE THE FIX IS IN?

ABSOLUTELY. IN SOME
PARTS OF THE COUNTRY,

THEY JUST LOVE SEEING THE GOOD
GUY GET THE DAYLIGHTS BEAT OUT OF HIM.

- THE GOOD GUY? THAT'S ME. HANDSOME HOWARD.
- EXACTLY.

- WH-WHAT ABOUT THE FIX?
- OH, THE... IT'S FIXED FOR YOU... TO LOSE.

OH, WAIT A MINUTE, COLT.
I DON'T WANT TO LOSE.

COME ON. YOU'RE GONNA GO OVER BIG
WITH THE CROWD. THEY'RE GONNA LOVE YA.

ESPECIALLY, UH, WHEN
YOU END UP IN THEIR LAPS.