The Facts of Life (1979–1988): Season 6, Episode 8 - E.G.O.C. (Edna Garrett on Campus) - full transcript
Mrs. Garrett enrolled in a Shakespeare class, but worries that she might neglect her business and have trouble fitting in with the college crowd.
♪ YOU TAKE THE GOOD,
YOU TAKE THE BAD ♪
♪ YOU TAKE 'EM BOTH
AND THERE YOU HAVE ♪
♪ THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪
♪ THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪
♪ THERE'S A TIME YOU
GOTTA GO AND SHOW ♪
♪ YOU'RE GROWIN'
NOW YOU KNOW ABOUT ♪
♪ THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪
♪ THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪
♪ WHEN THE WORLD NEVER SEEMS ♪
♪ TO BE LIVIN' UP
TO YOUR DREAMS ♪
♪ AND SUDDENLY
YOU'RE FINDIN' OUT ♪
♪ THE FACTS OF
LIFE ARE ALL ABOUT ♪
♪ YOU ♪
♪ YOU ♪
♪ IT TAKES A LOT
TO GET 'EM RIGHT ♪
♪ WHEN YOU'RE LEARNIN'
THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪
♪ LEARNIN' THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪
♪ LEARNIN' THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪♪
OOH! "THE LIFE OF VAN GOGH."
I THINK I'LL TAKE THAT ONE.
"FILM APPRECIATION 211"
WITH PROFESSOR DUNCAN.
FILM APPRECIATION? THAT'S TOUGH!
RIGHT UP THERE WITH
CALCULUS, PHYSICS.
IT'S A HARD COURSE, NATALIE.
HAVE YOU EVER TRIED TO
TAKE NOTES IN THE DARK?
HEY, ARE YOU TAKING PROFESSOR
RYAN'S "GIVE ME SHAKESPEARE"?
"GIVE ME SHAKESPEARE"
IS THE NAME OF A COURSE?
ISN'T IT OUTRAGEOUS?
PROFESSOR RYAN CAME UP WITH IT.
HE'S SO INNOVATIVE.
YEAH, RIGHT. I SAW HIM ON THE
WAY TO ONE OF HIS LECTURES
DRESSED AS LADY MACBETH.
HE DARES TO BE DIFFERENT.
HE DARES TO WEAR MAKE-UP.
THE MAN SHOULD JUST TEACH
THE COURSE AND STICK TO TWEED.
THEN WHY ARE YOU
TAKING THE COURSE?
BECAUSE I LIKE SHAKESPEARE.
I KNOW THAT SOUNDS WILD.
"TO DIE, TO SLEEP,
"TO SLEEP, PERCHANCE TO DREAM,
AYE, THERE'S THE RUB."
HAMLET.
LOVED HER, HATED THE CHEESE.
IT KILLS ME THE WAY YOU CAN
REMEMBER THOSE SPEECHES.
I GET AS FAR AS "TO BE OR..."
THEN I GO BLANK.
SHAKESPEARE'S WORDS
ARE SO BEAUTIFUL.
WHO CAN FORGET THEM?
ANYWAY, IT ALSO HAPPENS TO BE
ONE OF THOSE THINGS ON MY LIFE LIST.
SEE THE GRAND CANYON,
READ ALL OF SHAKESPEARE'S PLAYS.
OH, WAIT A MINUTE.
IF I TAKE VAN GOGH ON TUESDAY
THAT CONFLICTS WITH ECONOMICS.
THEN WHY DON'T YOU TAKE
ECONOMICS ON WEDNESDAY NIGHT?
I CAN'T. I HAVE...
HOW DO YOU KNOW
THE LANGLEY SCHEDULE?
WELL, YOU LEFT IT LYING AROUND.
I MAY HAVE GLANCED
AT IT ONCE OR TWICE.
MRS. GARRETT, ARE YOU
THINKING ABOUT TAKING A CLASS?
I'VE THOUGHT ABOUT IT.
ACTUALLY, I'VE THOUGHT
ABOUT GETTING MY DEGREE.
YOU SHOULD DO IT, MRS. G.
I WILL.
I MADE MYSELF A PROMISE,
AND I'LL KEEP IT... SOMEDAY.
LANGLEY IS A GREAT SCHOOL.
A LOT OF THEIR STUDENTS
ARE SENIOR CITIZENS.
LET ME HAVE ANOTHER
PASS AT THAT ONE.
I THINK IT'S A TERRIFIC IDEA.
MM, BUT NOT NOW.
NOW ISN'T THE RIGHT TIME.
WHY NOT?
BECAUSE I'VE GOT
A BUSINESS TO RUN.
I'M HERE ALL DAY LONG.
SO YOU START WITH ONE COURSE.
LOOK, HERE'S ONE THAT
STARTS AFTER THE SHOP CLOSES.
"UNDERSTANDING PORTUGUESE."
BLAIR, I DON'T WANT TO
UNDERSTAND PORTUGUESE.
I WANT TO BE AN ENGLISH MAJOR.
I'M SORRY.
I WASN'T AWARE OF YOUR GOALS.
I GOT IT.
TAKE "GIVE ME SHAKESPEARE"
WITH BLAIR AND ME.
SO TWO DAY A WEEK YOU
CLOSE THE SHOP EARLY.
YEAH, GO FOR IT!
YOU WON'T EVEN
HAVE TO CLOSE EARLY.
NAT AND I WILL WATCH
THE SHOP, WON'T WE, NAT?
YEAH. GO FOR IT.
IT'S THE LEAST WE CAN DO.
I MEAN, YOU CERTAINLY
INVESTED IN OUR EDUCATION.
COME ON. YOU KNOW
YOU WANT TO DO IT.
OF COURSE I WANT
TO DO IT, BUT...
DO YOU REALLY THINK I CAN DO IT?
OF COURSE YOU
CAN! SURE, YOU CAN.
WELL, GOOD. BECAUSE SO DO I.
ALL RIGHT! GREAT!
WE SHOULD'VE BEEN
EARLIER. I TOLD YOU.
I COULDN'T FIND THE
RIGHT ACCESSORIES.
YOU CAN'T RUSH GOOD TASTE.
YOU OK, MRS. GARRETT?
OH, I'M FINE. I'M FINE.
MY FEET ARE A LITTLE TIRED.
MUST BE THIS FLOOR.
I TOLD YOU... SNEAKERS
FOR REGISTRATION.
AND THAT'S A LOVELY
SCENT YOU'RE WEARING.
OH, IS IT TOO MUCH?
NO.
WILL I BE GETTING
MY TEXTBOOK NOW?
NO, NO, NO, WE'LL BE MAKING
A BOOKSTORE-RUN LATER.
OH, GOOD, BECAUSE I'M GONNA
NEED PLENTY OF NEW BOOKS.
I HOPE I DIDN'T RUSH INTO THIS.
DO YOU THINK I RUSHED INTO THIS?
ABSOLUTELY NOT.
COME ON, YOU MADE A
PROMISE TO YOURSELF,
AND YOU'RE KEEPING IT.
I RESPECT YOU.
JUST GET SOME SENSIBLE SHOES...
ADIDAS, CONVERSE,
ANYTHING RUBBER.
I DON'T MEAN TO PANIC,
BUT THEY LOOK A LITTLE
LOW ON CARDS UP THERE.
OH, THAT'S TERRIBLE.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?
IT MEANS PROFESSOR
RYAN'S CLASS MIGHT BE FULL.
OH, WELL, I INSIST.
YOU TWO LINE UP AHEAD OF ME.
IT'S OK FOR ME TO DABBLE,
BUT THIS IS YOUR FUTURE.
THAT'S GREAT, BLAIR!
BECAUSE YOUR BELT HAD TO MATCH,
MRS. G. WILL CONTINUE
TO LIVE IN IGNORANCE.
NEXT.
YOU'RE UP, JO.
OH. I HAVE A MAN COMING
TO FIX THE DEEP FREEZE.
NATALIE AND TOOTIE
WON'T KNOW WHAT TO SAY.
THEY'LL SAY, "FIX IT."
AND I'M EXPECTING A
SHIPMENT OF CAULIFLOWER.
PEOPLE DON'T UNDERSTAND
WHAT IT'S LIKE TO HAVE A BUSINESS.
A BUSINESS IS LIKE A CHILD.
YOUR TURN, BLAIR.
TAKE OVER.
HER BUSINESS IS LIKE A CHILD.
JUST LIKE A CHILD.
YOU DON'T CARE
FOR IT, NURTURE IT
AND THEN DECIDE TO GO BACK
TO SCHOOL WHEN SHE'S ONLY TWO.
A MOTHER JUST WOULDN'T DO THAT.
I GOT THE LAST CARD.
THE CLASS IS FULL.
I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS.
I'M SORRY, MRS. G.
I TOLD YOU, WE SHOULD'VE
BEEN HERE EARLIER.
HERE, TAKE MINE. TAKE MINE.
NO, NO, NO, IT'S ALL RIGHT.
JUST ONE OF THOSE THINGS.
BUT IT WOULD'VE BEEN SUCH FUN.
WELL, IT JUST
WASN'T MEANT TO BE.
THE FATES SPEAK,
WE HAVE TO LISTEN.
I'M SORRY.
TWO OF THESE FOR
PROFESSOR RYAN'S CLASS
GOT STUCK TOGETHER.
HERE'S AN EXTRA.
THERE WILL BE NO MIDTERM,
THERE WILL BE NO FINAL.
THERE WILL BE A LOT OF PAPERS.
NOW, DON'T COMPLAIN. YOU'RE ABOUT
TO EMBARK ON A GREAT ADVENTURE.
DON'T YOU FIND THE
PROSPECTS THRILLING?
OH, YEAH. EXACTLY.
I GUARANTEE THAT SHAKESPEARE
WILL PRESENT NO PROBLEMS.
I BET ALL OF YOU
COULD WRITE A PAPER
JUST ON WHAT YOU
LEARNED IN HIGH SCHOOL.
HMM?
I DIDN'T TAKE SHAKESPEARE
IN HIGH SCHOOL.
THEN YOU HAVE A PROBLEM.
YES.
MY NAME IS EDNA GARRETT.
I JUST WANTED TO SAY THAT I AM
SO THRILLED TO BE IN THIS CLASS.
BECAUSE I REALLY
LOVE SHAKESPEARE.
AND I'VE ALWAYS HAD...
THANK YOU FOR
SHARING THAT WITH US.
NOW, SOME OF YOU MAY THINK
MY TEACHING METHODS
ARE SLIGHTLY UNORTHODOX,
BUT... LIVE FROM VERONA,
IT'S TIME TO PLAY THE
RENAISSANCE FEUD.
LET'S MEET OUR TWO TEAMS.
FIRST, THE CAPULETS.
JULIET.
AND HER FIANCE
PARIS AND HER NURSE.
AND THERE THEY ARE,
THE CAPULETS, READY FOR ACTION.
OH, JULIETTE,
YOU'RE A YOUNG ONE.
YOU COULDN'T BE
MORE THAN WHAT... 13.
AH, CORRECT!
AND WHAT DO YOU DO, LOVE?
WELL, I GO TO BALLS.
I STAND ON BALCONIES.
I TAKE POISON.
YOU CRAZY KIDS.
SO MUCH FOR THE CAPULETS.
NOW, LET'S MEET THE MONTAGUES.
MY LADY. ME?
COULDN'T YOU GET SOMEBODY ELSE?
"COWARDS DIE MANY TIMES
BEFORE THEIR DEATHS."
ON YOUR FEET, KNAVE.
YOU, YOU'RE SERVER.
GO SIT ON THAT STOOL DOWN THERE.
HELLO, MONTAGUES.
HOWDY.
ROMEO, ROMEO.
TELL US A BIT ABOUT
YOURSELF, ROMEO.
WELL, I LIKE FENCING,
BALCONY CLIMBING,
AND JULIET OVER THERE.
SHE'S KIND OF CUTE.
SOUNDS LIKE
STAR-CROSSED LOVE, HUH?
ALL RIGHT. LET'S PLAY THE FEUD.
ROMEO, JULIET.
100 ELIZABETHANS SURVEYED,
TOP THREE ANSWERS ON THE BOARD.
NAME A SHAKESPEAREAN PLAY
THAT TOOK PLACE
IN THE SAME COUNTRY
IN WHICH ELVIS
COSTELLO WAS BORN.
[RINGS BELL]
HENRY IV.
HENRY IV. THE
SURVEY SAYETH... DING.
'TIS TRUE. PLAY OR PASS?
WE'LL PASS.
HUH! THOU ART CHICKENS.
NOW, I KNOW, LOVE, I'M
SUPPOSED TO GIVE YOU A KISS,
BUT THIS IS THE 15th CENTURY,
AND YOU MIGHT HAVE THE PLAGUE.
DO YOU HAVE AN ANSWER FOR ME?
UH, RICHARD SOMEBODY.
GOOD ANSWER.
SHOW ME RICHARD SOMEBODY.
DING.
YOU DIDN'T JUMP.
THAT'S ALL RIGHT.
NAME A SHAKESPEAREAN PLAY THAT
TOOK PLACE IN THE SAME COUNTRY
IN WHICH ELVIS
COSTELLO WAS BORN.
IF IT'S THERE, YOU
GET THE SHILLINGS.
IF NOT, CAPULETS,
PREPARE TO STEAL.
UH, ELVIS PRESLEY?
COSTELLO. YOU
HAVE THREE SECONDS.
IT'S IN THE COUNTRY...
OH, I KNOW IT.
BUUUOOOG! SORRY!
NAME A SHAKESPEAREAN PLAY.
THE MERRY WIVES OF WINDSOR.
THE MERRY WIVES OF WINDSOR.
DING.
THE CAPULETS WIN THE PRIZE.
ANYONE WANT TO GO ON?
DO YOU WANT TO GO ON?
WHO'S GOING FOR
IT? WHAT ABOUT YOU?
THAT'S IT! I'VE HAD IT
WITH YOUR NEW IDEAS!
I'VE BEEN UP SINCE 6 A.M.
BAKING BUFFALO-SHAPED CAKES
AND KANGAROO-SHAPED QUICHES.
IT'S LIKE A JUNGLE IN THERE.
I'M AFRAID TO GO IN ALONE.
NATALIE, WE'RE IN CHARGE.
WE'VE GOT TO MOVE
FORWARD, BREAK NEW GROUND.
THINK OF US AS PIONEERS.
THINK OF ME AS QUITTING.
IF I HAVE TO MAKE ONE MORE
LEOPARD CUPCAKE, I'M OUT.
NAT, ARE YOU BLIND?
THIS IS OUR CHANCE TO
SHOW OUR CREATIVITY.
PRETEND YOU'RE THE CUSTOMER.
YOU WALK IN, YOU SEE
A PIG-SHAPED QUICHE.
INSTANTLY, YOU'RE ENGAGED,
YOU'RE INTERESTED,
YOU'RE TALKING!
I'M WALKING.
YOU NEVER SUPPORT ANYTHING I DO.
I TRY, BUT...
YOU'VE CHANGED SINCE
THEY TOOK YOUR BRACES OFF.
SHE BOUGHT A DIFFERENT
COLORED PENCIL
FOR EACH PERIOD OF SHAKESPEARE.
I KNOW. WASN'T THAT CUTE?
OH, YOU GUYS SHOULD'VE SEEN
MRS. GARRETT IN CLASS TODAY.
SHE WAS SO CUTE.
REALLY? WHAT'D SHE DO?
WELL, SHE... WAS JUST SO CUTE.
CUTE?
DID SHE MAKE A GOOD IMPRESSION?
OH, YEAH.
SHE WORE THAT DARLING JACKET.
SHE DID VERY WELL.
EXCEPT FOR THAT
ROMEO AND JULIET THING.
HA! HA! WHAT?
WHAT?
SHE JUST SAID THAT ONE OF
THE THEMES OF ROMEO AND JULIET
WAS THAT KIDS SHOULD BE
ALLOWED TO EXPRESS THEMSELVES.
AND THEN SOMEBODY SAID,
"YOU MEAN LIKE CULTURE CLUB?"
AND MRS. GARRETT SAID,
"YOU COULD SAY
THAT ABOUT ANY CLUB."
MRS. GARRETT, YOU KNOW
CULTURE CLUB, BOY GEORGE?
OF COURSE I DO. I JUST
THOUGHT EVERYONE
COULD USE A GOOD LAUGH.
I GUESS I WAS A
BIT OUT OF IT, HUH?
NO. YOU WERE FUNNY.
AW, YOU WERE CUTE.
CUTE ISN'T EXACTLY
WHAT I WAS GOING FOR.
CUTE IS VERY GOOD
FOR THE FIRST DAY.
NEXT TIME, YOU'LL BE SCHOLARLY.
YOU PROMISE? I PROMISE.
WELL, I'M GONNA BE IN
MY ROOM WITH ROMEO.
WE DON'T WANT TO BE DISTURBED.
ISN'T THAT CUTE?
OK, EDNA LET'S TAKE
IT FROM THE TOP.
ONCE MORE WITH FEELING.
"ROMEO AND JULIET."
I ALREADY KNOW HOW ROMEO FEELS,
HOW JULIET LOOKS,
HOW THE CAPULETS EAT,
HOW THE MONTAGUES DRESS,
AND HOW EVERYONE DIES.
GOOD GIRL. YOU DESERVE
ANOTHER CUP OF COFFEE.
AND... MAYBE EVEN... A COOKIE.
HMM.
WHY IS THAT RAISIN BREAD
IN THE SHAPE OF A... BUFFALO?
AM I LOSING TOUCH
WITH MY BUSINESS?
NO, NO, I'M NOT.
BUSINESS IS GOOD.
IN FACT, VERY GOOD.
STUDYING IS GOOD. VERY GOOD.
THEN WHY AM I SO NERVOUS?
IT'S ONLY AN ORAL QUIZ TOMORROW.
THAT WOULD MEAN SPEAKING.
I DON'T WANT TO DO THIS.
I HAVEN'T OPENED MY MOUTH
IN CLASS SINCE THE FIRST DAY.
NOW, COME ON, EDNA,
GET A GRIP ON YOURSELF.
AHEM. OK. FINAL SCENE.
"HOW OFT WHEN MEN ARE
ARE AT THE POINT OF DEATH
HAVE THEY BEEN MARRIED?"
MAYBE I'VE OVERDRESSED.
MOST OF THE GIRLS WORE PANTS.
THAT'S IT. I'M NOT
WEARING THE PEARLS.
THE PEARLS ARE OUT.
NOW.
NOW ROMEO AND
JULIET ARE IN THE TOMB.
FRIAR LAURENCE COMES IN,
AND CAPULET COMES
IN, HIS WIFE COMES IN.
OH, BOY, THAT TOMB MUST BE
THE SIZE OF YANKEE STADIUM.
FINE TIME TO BE TELLING JOKES
I'VE GOT AN EXAM IN 10 HOURS.
EDNA, YOU KNOW YOU CAN DO IT.
YOU KNOW ALL THE
THEMES, THE SUBTHEMES,
WHAT'S BENEATH THE SUBTHEMES.
JUST TAKE A DEEP
BREATH AND RELAX.
GOOD.
THEY SAY IF YOU THINK
OF SOMETHING PEACEFUL...
DOVES ARE PEACEFUL.
JULIET PROBABLY KEPT A DOVE.
BUT THEN, SHE'S DEAD.
"BUT SOFT? WHAT LIGHT
THROUGH YONDER WINDOW BREAKS?
"IT IS THE EAST AND
JULIET IS THE SUN.
"ARISE, FAIR SUN, AND
KILL THE ENVIEST MOON
WHO IS ALREADY SICK
AND PALE WITH GRIEF."
AND DESPERATELY
WANTS TO ACE THIS CLASS.
IN THE MERCHANT OF
VENICE, PORTIA SAYS,
"THE QUALITY OF
MERCY IS NOT STRAINED."
"IT DROPPETH AS THE
GENTLE RAIN FROM HEAVEN
UPON THE PLACE BENEATH."
THAT'S VERY GOOD.
ACT IV, SCENE ONE.
IS IT?
SO IT IS.
WHY IS PORTIA
SAYING ALL THIS, EDNA?
WELL, BECAUSE...
I KNEW I SHOULDN'T
WEAR THESE PEARLS.
I SAID, "EDNA, DON'T WEAR THEM."
WHY DON'T I GET BACK TO YOU.
WELL, IT'S AN OLD STRING.
IT WAS BOUND TO HAPPEN.
IN OTHELLO,
IAGO TALKS ABOUT
THE CURSE OF SERVICE.
THE PUZZLES ME, JO. I LOOK
TO YOU FOR CLARIFICATION.
LOOK TO ME NOW?
NOW'S GOOD.
UH, ALL RIGHT. IAGO WAS ANGRY
BECAUSE HE WANTED TO
BE OTHELLO'S LIEUTENANT
AND HE GOT SKIPPED
OVER FOR PROMOTION.
THAT IS VERY, VERY GOOD, JO.
HMM.
LET'S GET BACK TO PORTIA.
EDNA.
"IT DROPPETH AS THE
GENTLE RAIN FROM HEAVEN..."
THAT'S FINE, EDNA.
I KNOW WE USED TO BE
TAUGHT TO QUOTE SHAKESPEARE,
BUT NOW WE THINK IT'S MORE
IMPORTANT TO UNDERSTAND HIM.
BUT I DO UNDERSTAND HIM. GOOD!
NOW'S YOUR CHANCE
TO PROVE YOUR POINT.
I UNDERSTOOD HIM THIS MORNING
WHEN I WAS IN THE SHOWER.
ARE YOU SUGGESTING
THAT WE CONVENE THIS
CLASS IN YOUR SHOWER?
WELL, NO.
EDNA, HOW LONG HAVE YOU
BEEN COMING TO THIS CLASS?
EVERY DAY I STRESS THE FACT
THAT THIS IS NOT A
CLASS IN ORATORY.
THESE ARE DRAMAS.
THINGS ARE HAPPENING.
I WANT YOU TO GO BACK
AND READ THE PLAYS AGAIN.
AND THIS TIME, TRY TO...
TRY TO LISTEN FOR THE MEANING.
TOMORROW, WE SHALL
CONTINUE WITH OTHELLO,
THE STORY OF THE DOOMED
MOOR AND THE DRIVEN IAGO.
MRS. GARRETT SAYS
YOU HAVE 10 MINUTES,
THEN YOU HAVE TO COME OUT.
NATALIE, WHY ARE THERE
MONKEYS IN WITH THE PELICANS?
DO YOU HEAR YOURSELF, TOOTIE?
NAT, I TOLD YOU.
MAMMALS OVER THERE,
BIRDS AND REPTILES OVER HERE.
I HAVE A GREAT IDEA.
WHY DON'T WE BAKE A
COUPLE OF ROUND QUICHES
SO WE GET A CHANCE TO USE
THAT CASH-REGISTER-SHAPED
THINK OVER THERE?
WHAT WAS THIS?
IT WAS A HORSE,
BUT ITS LEG FELL OFF.
WANT ME TO SHOOT IT?
I CAN'T BELIEVE THE BILL I GOT
FROM THE FREEZER REPAIR MAN.
UNLESS HE CAMPED OUT OVERNIGHT,
I CAN'T JUSTIFY $87.50!
OH, AND BY THE WAY, GIRLS,
IF I WANT BUFFALO,
I'LL GO TO THE LONE PRAIRIE.
SHE SAYS THE ANIMALS GO, TOOTIE.
REALLY?
THE WHOLE HERD.
HEAD 'EM UP, MOVE 'EM OUT.
HEY, MRS. G, I GOT THE
WORD THAT RYAN IS KNOWN
FOR HIS BACK-TO-BACK QUIZZES.
I JUST THOUGHT YOU MIGHT
WANT TO KNOW THAT AFTER TODAY.
NOT THAT TODAY WAS
ANYTHING TO WORRY ABOUT.
OF COURSE NOT.
I WAS MY USUAL BUNGLING SELF.
NO, YOU WEREN'T.
SORRY. I WAS MY USUAL
ENTERTAINING SELF.
YOU KNOW, I'VE BEEN GETTING
SO MANY LAUGHS LATELY,
I'VE BEEN THINKING OF
CHANGING MY NAME TO SHECKY
AND TAKING MY
EDUCATION ON THE ROAD.
COME ON, YOU'RE STILL
FEELING YOU'RE WAY AROUND.
YOU'RE JUST GETTING
YOUR FEET WET.
MY FEET ARE SOAKED, JO,
AND THE WATER'S RISING.
I THINK YOU'RE
EXAGGERATING, MRS. G.
CAN YOU GIRLS MIND THE SHOP
WHILE I RUN OVER
TO THE BOOKSTORE?
I WAS THINKING IF I CAN GET
A REFUND ON THESE BOOKS,
I'LL BE ABLE TO PAY
FOR THE FREEZER.
WAIT A MINUTE.
YOU'RE DROPPING OUT?
NO. I'M WALKING OUT
WITH INCREDIBLE DIGNITY.
IT WAS CRAZY OF ME TO THINK I
COULD HANDLE COLLEGE RIGHT NOW.
I'VE GOT A BUSINESS TO RUN,
AND IT'S BEING NEGLECTED.
THE BUSINESS IS FINE.
WELL, IT'S NOT
JUST THE BUSINESS,
IT'S-IT'S MY PERSONAL LIFE.
I DON'T HAVE TIME TO
GO TO THE CLEANERS.
I NEVER GET TO THE POST OFFICE.
YOU'RE GIVING UP YOUR EDUCATION
SO YOU CAN BUY STAMPS?
MAKES SENSE.
THERE ARE OTHER FACTORS!
THERE ARE CONSIDERATIONS.
THERE ARE IMPLICATIONS.
I JUST DON'T THINK I CAN DO IT.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN?
SCHOOL. SCHOOL.
I DON'T THINK I CAN DO IT.
LOOK, YOU JUST HAD A BAD DAY.
OH, BELIEVE ME, BLAIR,
I CAN HANDLE A
BAD DAY, BUT THIS...
I NEVER WORRIED ABOUT
BIRTHDAYS OR GRAY HAIR.
I REALLY DIDN'T THINK OF
MYSELF AS CHANGING VERY MUCH.
BUT NOW, I WALK
INTO THAT CLASSROOM,
AND I LOOK AT ALL
THOSE YOUNG FACES,
AND I KNOW I DON'T BELONG THERE.
I DON'T UNDERSTAND
THE REFERENCES.
THE TEACHING
METHODS ARE DIFFERENT.
I FEEL SO... UNCOMFORTABLE.
THINGS WILL CHANGE.
IN A FEW WEEKS, YOU'LL
FEEL LIKE ONE OF THE GUYS.
OR MAYBE YOU WON'T.
BUT IF YOU LOVE
WHAT YOU'RE DOING,
THE REST IS WORTH IT.
WELL...
I DON'T KNOW IF IT
IS TO ME ANYMORE.
I DON'T LIKE DOUBTING MYSELF.
AND ALL OF A SUDDEN,
I'M STARTING TO FEEL
LIKE I'M NOT AS
SHARP AS I USED TO BE,
OR MY MEMORY ISN'T AS GOOD.
I WANTED THIS
EDUCATION... SO MUCH.
BUT... MAYBE I WAITED TOO LONG.
I DON'T KNOW IF IT'S WORTH IT.
LOOK, MRS. G, I'LL ADMIT
I DON'T KNOW EXACTLY
WHAT YOU'RE GOING THROUGH,
BUT I DO KNOW ABOUT
LOSING CONFIDENCE,
AND THAT CAN HAPPEN ANYTIME.
I CAN UNDERSTAND INSECURITY.
I'VE NEVER EXPERIENCED IT,
BUT I CAN UNDERSTAND IT.
LOOK, YOU KNOW MORE ABOUT
SHAKESPEARE AND EVERYTHING ELSE
THAN ANYBODY IN THAT CLASS.
YOU'LL SUCCEED IF YOU'LL
JUST GIVE YOURSELF THE CHANCE.
IT'S YOUR DECISION.
WE JUST WANT YOU TO BE HAPPY.
[BELL RINGS]
MY TIMER.
[BELL STOPS]
HAVE YOU READ THE
LAST HALF OF MACBETH?
YEAH. THAT LAST
SPEECH OF HIS IS A BEAR.
THERE'S A LOT I DIDN'T GET.
WELL, THEN LET'S
JUST READ IT AGAIN.
"TOMORROW AND
TOMORROW AND TOMORROW
"CREEPS IN THIS PETTY
PACE FROM DAY TO DAY
"TO THE LAST SYLLABLE
OF RECORDED TIME,
"AND ALL OUR YESTERDAYS
"HAVE LIGHTED FOOLS
THE WAY TO DUSTY DEATH.
"OUT, OUT, BRIEF CANDLE.
"LIFE'S BUT A WALKING SHADOW.
"A POOR PLAYER
"THAT STRUTS AND FRETS HIS HOUR
"UPON THE STAGE,
"AND THEN IS HEARD NO MORE.
"IT IS A TALE...
"FULL OF SOUND AND FURY
SIGNIFYING NOTHING."
YOU TAKE THE BAD ♪
♪ YOU TAKE 'EM BOTH
AND THERE YOU HAVE ♪
♪ THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪
♪ THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪
♪ THERE'S A TIME YOU
GOTTA GO AND SHOW ♪
♪ YOU'RE GROWIN'
NOW YOU KNOW ABOUT ♪
♪ THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪
♪ THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪
♪ WHEN THE WORLD NEVER SEEMS ♪
♪ TO BE LIVIN' UP
TO YOUR DREAMS ♪
♪ AND SUDDENLY
YOU'RE FINDIN' OUT ♪
♪ THE FACTS OF
LIFE ARE ALL ABOUT ♪
♪ YOU ♪
♪ YOU ♪
♪ IT TAKES A LOT
TO GET 'EM RIGHT ♪
♪ WHEN YOU'RE LEARNIN'
THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪
♪ LEARNIN' THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪
♪ LEARNIN' THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪♪
OOH! "THE LIFE OF VAN GOGH."
I THINK I'LL TAKE THAT ONE.
"FILM APPRECIATION 211"
WITH PROFESSOR DUNCAN.
FILM APPRECIATION? THAT'S TOUGH!
RIGHT UP THERE WITH
CALCULUS, PHYSICS.
IT'S A HARD COURSE, NATALIE.
HAVE YOU EVER TRIED TO
TAKE NOTES IN THE DARK?
HEY, ARE YOU TAKING PROFESSOR
RYAN'S "GIVE ME SHAKESPEARE"?
"GIVE ME SHAKESPEARE"
IS THE NAME OF A COURSE?
ISN'T IT OUTRAGEOUS?
PROFESSOR RYAN CAME UP WITH IT.
HE'S SO INNOVATIVE.
YEAH, RIGHT. I SAW HIM ON THE
WAY TO ONE OF HIS LECTURES
DRESSED AS LADY MACBETH.
HE DARES TO BE DIFFERENT.
HE DARES TO WEAR MAKE-UP.
THE MAN SHOULD JUST TEACH
THE COURSE AND STICK TO TWEED.
THEN WHY ARE YOU
TAKING THE COURSE?
BECAUSE I LIKE SHAKESPEARE.
I KNOW THAT SOUNDS WILD.
"TO DIE, TO SLEEP,
"TO SLEEP, PERCHANCE TO DREAM,
AYE, THERE'S THE RUB."
HAMLET.
LOVED HER, HATED THE CHEESE.
IT KILLS ME THE WAY YOU CAN
REMEMBER THOSE SPEECHES.
I GET AS FAR AS "TO BE OR..."
THEN I GO BLANK.
SHAKESPEARE'S WORDS
ARE SO BEAUTIFUL.
WHO CAN FORGET THEM?
ANYWAY, IT ALSO HAPPENS TO BE
ONE OF THOSE THINGS ON MY LIFE LIST.
SEE THE GRAND CANYON,
READ ALL OF SHAKESPEARE'S PLAYS.
OH, WAIT A MINUTE.
IF I TAKE VAN GOGH ON TUESDAY
THAT CONFLICTS WITH ECONOMICS.
THEN WHY DON'T YOU TAKE
ECONOMICS ON WEDNESDAY NIGHT?
I CAN'T. I HAVE...
HOW DO YOU KNOW
THE LANGLEY SCHEDULE?
WELL, YOU LEFT IT LYING AROUND.
I MAY HAVE GLANCED
AT IT ONCE OR TWICE.
MRS. GARRETT, ARE YOU
THINKING ABOUT TAKING A CLASS?
I'VE THOUGHT ABOUT IT.
ACTUALLY, I'VE THOUGHT
ABOUT GETTING MY DEGREE.
YOU SHOULD DO IT, MRS. G.
I WILL.
I MADE MYSELF A PROMISE,
AND I'LL KEEP IT... SOMEDAY.
LANGLEY IS A GREAT SCHOOL.
A LOT OF THEIR STUDENTS
ARE SENIOR CITIZENS.
LET ME HAVE ANOTHER
PASS AT THAT ONE.
I THINK IT'S A TERRIFIC IDEA.
MM, BUT NOT NOW.
NOW ISN'T THE RIGHT TIME.
WHY NOT?
BECAUSE I'VE GOT
A BUSINESS TO RUN.
I'M HERE ALL DAY LONG.
SO YOU START WITH ONE COURSE.
LOOK, HERE'S ONE THAT
STARTS AFTER THE SHOP CLOSES.
"UNDERSTANDING PORTUGUESE."
BLAIR, I DON'T WANT TO
UNDERSTAND PORTUGUESE.
I WANT TO BE AN ENGLISH MAJOR.
I'M SORRY.
I WASN'T AWARE OF YOUR GOALS.
I GOT IT.
TAKE "GIVE ME SHAKESPEARE"
WITH BLAIR AND ME.
SO TWO DAY A WEEK YOU
CLOSE THE SHOP EARLY.
YEAH, GO FOR IT!
YOU WON'T EVEN
HAVE TO CLOSE EARLY.
NAT AND I WILL WATCH
THE SHOP, WON'T WE, NAT?
YEAH. GO FOR IT.
IT'S THE LEAST WE CAN DO.
I MEAN, YOU CERTAINLY
INVESTED IN OUR EDUCATION.
COME ON. YOU KNOW
YOU WANT TO DO IT.
OF COURSE I WANT
TO DO IT, BUT...
DO YOU REALLY THINK I CAN DO IT?
OF COURSE YOU
CAN! SURE, YOU CAN.
WELL, GOOD. BECAUSE SO DO I.
ALL RIGHT! GREAT!
WE SHOULD'VE BEEN
EARLIER. I TOLD YOU.
I COULDN'T FIND THE
RIGHT ACCESSORIES.
YOU CAN'T RUSH GOOD TASTE.
YOU OK, MRS. GARRETT?
OH, I'M FINE. I'M FINE.
MY FEET ARE A LITTLE TIRED.
MUST BE THIS FLOOR.
I TOLD YOU... SNEAKERS
FOR REGISTRATION.
AND THAT'S A LOVELY
SCENT YOU'RE WEARING.
OH, IS IT TOO MUCH?
NO.
WILL I BE GETTING
MY TEXTBOOK NOW?
NO, NO, NO, WE'LL BE MAKING
A BOOKSTORE-RUN LATER.
OH, GOOD, BECAUSE I'M GONNA
NEED PLENTY OF NEW BOOKS.
I HOPE I DIDN'T RUSH INTO THIS.
DO YOU THINK I RUSHED INTO THIS?
ABSOLUTELY NOT.
COME ON, YOU MADE A
PROMISE TO YOURSELF,
AND YOU'RE KEEPING IT.
I RESPECT YOU.
JUST GET SOME SENSIBLE SHOES...
ADIDAS, CONVERSE,
ANYTHING RUBBER.
I DON'T MEAN TO PANIC,
BUT THEY LOOK A LITTLE
LOW ON CARDS UP THERE.
OH, THAT'S TERRIBLE.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?
IT MEANS PROFESSOR
RYAN'S CLASS MIGHT BE FULL.
OH, WELL, I INSIST.
YOU TWO LINE UP AHEAD OF ME.
IT'S OK FOR ME TO DABBLE,
BUT THIS IS YOUR FUTURE.
THAT'S GREAT, BLAIR!
BECAUSE YOUR BELT HAD TO MATCH,
MRS. G. WILL CONTINUE
TO LIVE IN IGNORANCE.
NEXT.
YOU'RE UP, JO.
OH. I HAVE A MAN COMING
TO FIX THE DEEP FREEZE.
NATALIE AND TOOTIE
WON'T KNOW WHAT TO SAY.
THEY'LL SAY, "FIX IT."
AND I'M EXPECTING A
SHIPMENT OF CAULIFLOWER.
PEOPLE DON'T UNDERSTAND
WHAT IT'S LIKE TO HAVE A BUSINESS.
A BUSINESS IS LIKE A CHILD.
YOUR TURN, BLAIR.
TAKE OVER.
HER BUSINESS IS LIKE A CHILD.
JUST LIKE A CHILD.
YOU DON'T CARE
FOR IT, NURTURE IT
AND THEN DECIDE TO GO BACK
TO SCHOOL WHEN SHE'S ONLY TWO.
A MOTHER JUST WOULDN'T DO THAT.
I GOT THE LAST CARD.
THE CLASS IS FULL.
I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS.
I'M SORRY, MRS. G.
I TOLD YOU, WE SHOULD'VE
BEEN HERE EARLIER.
HERE, TAKE MINE. TAKE MINE.
NO, NO, NO, IT'S ALL RIGHT.
JUST ONE OF THOSE THINGS.
BUT IT WOULD'VE BEEN SUCH FUN.
WELL, IT JUST
WASN'T MEANT TO BE.
THE FATES SPEAK,
WE HAVE TO LISTEN.
I'M SORRY.
TWO OF THESE FOR
PROFESSOR RYAN'S CLASS
GOT STUCK TOGETHER.
HERE'S AN EXTRA.
THERE WILL BE NO MIDTERM,
THERE WILL BE NO FINAL.
THERE WILL BE A LOT OF PAPERS.
NOW, DON'T COMPLAIN. YOU'RE ABOUT
TO EMBARK ON A GREAT ADVENTURE.
DON'T YOU FIND THE
PROSPECTS THRILLING?
OH, YEAH. EXACTLY.
I GUARANTEE THAT SHAKESPEARE
WILL PRESENT NO PROBLEMS.
I BET ALL OF YOU
COULD WRITE A PAPER
JUST ON WHAT YOU
LEARNED IN HIGH SCHOOL.
HMM?
I DIDN'T TAKE SHAKESPEARE
IN HIGH SCHOOL.
THEN YOU HAVE A PROBLEM.
YES.
MY NAME IS EDNA GARRETT.
I JUST WANTED TO SAY THAT I AM
SO THRILLED TO BE IN THIS CLASS.
BECAUSE I REALLY
LOVE SHAKESPEARE.
AND I'VE ALWAYS HAD...
THANK YOU FOR
SHARING THAT WITH US.
NOW, SOME OF YOU MAY THINK
MY TEACHING METHODS
ARE SLIGHTLY UNORTHODOX,
BUT... LIVE FROM VERONA,
IT'S TIME TO PLAY THE
RENAISSANCE FEUD.
LET'S MEET OUR TWO TEAMS.
FIRST, THE CAPULETS.
JULIET.
AND HER FIANCE
PARIS AND HER NURSE.
AND THERE THEY ARE,
THE CAPULETS, READY FOR ACTION.
OH, JULIETTE,
YOU'RE A YOUNG ONE.
YOU COULDN'T BE
MORE THAN WHAT... 13.
AH, CORRECT!
AND WHAT DO YOU DO, LOVE?
WELL, I GO TO BALLS.
I STAND ON BALCONIES.
I TAKE POISON.
YOU CRAZY KIDS.
SO MUCH FOR THE CAPULETS.
NOW, LET'S MEET THE MONTAGUES.
MY LADY. ME?
COULDN'T YOU GET SOMEBODY ELSE?
"COWARDS DIE MANY TIMES
BEFORE THEIR DEATHS."
ON YOUR FEET, KNAVE.
YOU, YOU'RE SERVER.
GO SIT ON THAT STOOL DOWN THERE.
HELLO, MONTAGUES.
HOWDY.
ROMEO, ROMEO.
TELL US A BIT ABOUT
YOURSELF, ROMEO.
WELL, I LIKE FENCING,
BALCONY CLIMBING,
AND JULIET OVER THERE.
SHE'S KIND OF CUTE.
SOUNDS LIKE
STAR-CROSSED LOVE, HUH?
ALL RIGHT. LET'S PLAY THE FEUD.
ROMEO, JULIET.
100 ELIZABETHANS SURVEYED,
TOP THREE ANSWERS ON THE BOARD.
NAME A SHAKESPEAREAN PLAY
THAT TOOK PLACE
IN THE SAME COUNTRY
IN WHICH ELVIS
COSTELLO WAS BORN.
[RINGS BELL]
HENRY IV.
HENRY IV. THE
SURVEY SAYETH... DING.
'TIS TRUE. PLAY OR PASS?
WE'LL PASS.
HUH! THOU ART CHICKENS.
NOW, I KNOW, LOVE, I'M
SUPPOSED TO GIVE YOU A KISS,
BUT THIS IS THE 15th CENTURY,
AND YOU MIGHT HAVE THE PLAGUE.
DO YOU HAVE AN ANSWER FOR ME?
UH, RICHARD SOMEBODY.
GOOD ANSWER.
SHOW ME RICHARD SOMEBODY.
DING.
YOU DIDN'T JUMP.
THAT'S ALL RIGHT.
NAME A SHAKESPEAREAN PLAY THAT
TOOK PLACE IN THE SAME COUNTRY
IN WHICH ELVIS
COSTELLO WAS BORN.
IF IT'S THERE, YOU
GET THE SHILLINGS.
IF NOT, CAPULETS,
PREPARE TO STEAL.
UH, ELVIS PRESLEY?
COSTELLO. YOU
HAVE THREE SECONDS.
IT'S IN THE COUNTRY...
OH, I KNOW IT.
BUUUOOOG! SORRY!
NAME A SHAKESPEAREAN PLAY.
THE MERRY WIVES OF WINDSOR.
THE MERRY WIVES OF WINDSOR.
DING.
THE CAPULETS WIN THE PRIZE.
ANYONE WANT TO GO ON?
DO YOU WANT TO GO ON?
WHO'S GOING FOR
IT? WHAT ABOUT YOU?
THAT'S IT! I'VE HAD IT
WITH YOUR NEW IDEAS!
I'VE BEEN UP SINCE 6 A.M.
BAKING BUFFALO-SHAPED CAKES
AND KANGAROO-SHAPED QUICHES.
IT'S LIKE A JUNGLE IN THERE.
I'M AFRAID TO GO IN ALONE.
NATALIE, WE'RE IN CHARGE.
WE'VE GOT TO MOVE
FORWARD, BREAK NEW GROUND.
THINK OF US AS PIONEERS.
THINK OF ME AS QUITTING.
IF I HAVE TO MAKE ONE MORE
LEOPARD CUPCAKE, I'M OUT.
NAT, ARE YOU BLIND?
THIS IS OUR CHANCE TO
SHOW OUR CREATIVITY.
PRETEND YOU'RE THE CUSTOMER.
YOU WALK IN, YOU SEE
A PIG-SHAPED QUICHE.
INSTANTLY, YOU'RE ENGAGED,
YOU'RE INTERESTED,
YOU'RE TALKING!
I'M WALKING.
YOU NEVER SUPPORT ANYTHING I DO.
I TRY, BUT...
YOU'VE CHANGED SINCE
THEY TOOK YOUR BRACES OFF.
SHE BOUGHT A DIFFERENT
COLORED PENCIL
FOR EACH PERIOD OF SHAKESPEARE.
I KNOW. WASN'T THAT CUTE?
OH, YOU GUYS SHOULD'VE SEEN
MRS. GARRETT IN CLASS TODAY.
SHE WAS SO CUTE.
REALLY? WHAT'D SHE DO?
WELL, SHE... WAS JUST SO CUTE.
CUTE?
DID SHE MAKE A GOOD IMPRESSION?
OH, YEAH.
SHE WORE THAT DARLING JACKET.
SHE DID VERY WELL.
EXCEPT FOR THAT
ROMEO AND JULIET THING.
HA! HA! WHAT?
WHAT?
SHE JUST SAID THAT ONE OF
THE THEMES OF ROMEO AND JULIET
WAS THAT KIDS SHOULD BE
ALLOWED TO EXPRESS THEMSELVES.
AND THEN SOMEBODY SAID,
"YOU MEAN LIKE CULTURE CLUB?"
AND MRS. GARRETT SAID,
"YOU COULD SAY
THAT ABOUT ANY CLUB."
MRS. GARRETT, YOU KNOW
CULTURE CLUB, BOY GEORGE?
OF COURSE I DO. I JUST
THOUGHT EVERYONE
COULD USE A GOOD LAUGH.
I GUESS I WAS A
BIT OUT OF IT, HUH?
NO. YOU WERE FUNNY.
AW, YOU WERE CUTE.
CUTE ISN'T EXACTLY
WHAT I WAS GOING FOR.
CUTE IS VERY GOOD
FOR THE FIRST DAY.
NEXT TIME, YOU'LL BE SCHOLARLY.
YOU PROMISE? I PROMISE.
WELL, I'M GONNA BE IN
MY ROOM WITH ROMEO.
WE DON'T WANT TO BE DISTURBED.
ISN'T THAT CUTE?
OK, EDNA LET'S TAKE
IT FROM THE TOP.
ONCE MORE WITH FEELING.
"ROMEO AND JULIET."
I ALREADY KNOW HOW ROMEO FEELS,
HOW JULIET LOOKS,
HOW THE CAPULETS EAT,
HOW THE MONTAGUES DRESS,
AND HOW EVERYONE DIES.
GOOD GIRL. YOU DESERVE
ANOTHER CUP OF COFFEE.
AND... MAYBE EVEN... A COOKIE.
HMM.
WHY IS THAT RAISIN BREAD
IN THE SHAPE OF A... BUFFALO?
AM I LOSING TOUCH
WITH MY BUSINESS?
NO, NO, I'M NOT.
BUSINESS IS GOOD.
IN FACT, VERY GOOD.
STUDYING IS GOOD. VERY GOOD.
THEN WHY AM I SO NERVOUS?
IT'S ONLY AN ORAL QUIZ TOMORROW.
THAT WOULD MEAN SPEAKING.
I DON'T WANT TO DO THIS.
I HAVEN'T OPENED MY MOUTH
IN CLASS SINCE THE FIRST DAY.
NOW, COME ON, EDNA,
GET A GRIP ON YOURSELF.
AHEM. OK. FINAL SCENE.
"HOW OFT WHEN MEN ARE
ARE AT THE POINT OF DEATH
HAVE THEY BEEN MARRIED?"
MAYBE I'VE OVERDRESSED.
MOST OF THE GIRLS WORE PANTS.
THAT'S IT. I'M NOT
WEARING THE PEARLS.
THE PEARLS ARE OUT.
NOW.
NOW ROMEO AND
JULIET ARE IN THE TOMB.
FRIAR LAURENCE COMES IN,
AND CAPULET COMES
IN, HIS WIFE COMES IN.
OH, BOY, THAT TOMB MUST BE
THE SIZE OF YANKEE STADIUM.
FINE TIME TO BE TELLING JOKES
I'VE GOT AN EXAM IN 10 HOURS.
EDNA, YOU KNOW YOU CAN DO IT.
YOU KNOW ALL THE
THEMES, THE SUBTHEMES,
WHAT'S BENEATH THE SUBTHEMES.
JUST TAKE A DEEP
BREATH AND RELAX.
GOOD.
THEY SAY IF YOU THINK
OF SOMETHING PEACEFUL...
DOVES ARE PEACEFUL.
JULIET PROBABLY KEPT A DOVE.
BUT THEN, SHE'S DEAD.
"BUT SOFT? WHAT LIGHT
THROUGH YONDER WINDOW BREAKS?
"IT IS THE EAST AND
JULIET IS THE SUN.
"ARISE, FAIR SUN, AND
KILL THE ENVIEST MOON
WHO IS ALREADY SICK
AND PALE WITH GRIEF."
AND DESPERATELY
WANTS TO ACE THIS CLASS.
IN THE MERCHANT OF
VENICE, PORTIA SAYS,
"THE QUALITY OF
MERCY IS NOT STRAINED."
"IT DROPPETH AS THE
GENTLE RAIN FROM HEAVEN
UPON THE PLACE BENEATH."
THAT'S VERY GOOD.
ACT IV, SCENE ONE.
IS IT?
SO IT IS.
WHY IS PORTIA
SAYING ALL THIS, EDNA?
WELL, BECAUSE...
I KNEW I SHOULDN'T
WEAR THESE PEARLS.
I SAID, "EDNA, DON'T WEAR THEM."
WHY DON'T I GET BACK TO YOU.
WELL, IT'S AN OLD STRING.
IT WAS BOUND TO HAPPEN.
IN OTHELLO,
IAGO TALKS ABOUT
THE CURSE OF SERVICE.
THE PUZZLES ME, JO. I LOOK
TO YOU FOR CLARIFICATION.
LOOK TO ME NOW?
NOW'S GOOD.
UH, ALL RIGHT. IAGO WAS ANGRY
BECAUSE HE WANTED TO
BE OTHELLO'S LIEUTENANT
AND HE GOT SKIPPED
OVER FOR PROMOTION.
THAT IS VERY, VERY GOOD, JO.
HMM.
LET'S GET BACK TO PORTIA.
EDNA.
"IT DROPPETH AS THE
GENTLE RAIN FROM HEAVEN..."
THAT'S FINE, EDNA.
I KNOW WE USED TO BE
TAUGHT TO QUOTE SHAKESPEARE,
BUT NOW WE THINK IT'S MORE
IMPORTANT TO UNDERSTAND HIM.
BUT I DO UNDERSTAND HIM. GOOD!
NOW'S YOUR CHANCE
TO PROVE YOUR POINT.
I UNDERSTOOD HIM THIS MORNING
WHEN I WAS IN THE SHOWER.
ARE YOU SUGGESTING
THAT WE CONVENE THIS
CLASS IN YOUR SHOWER?
WELL, NO.
EDNA, HOW LONG HAVE YOU
BEEN COMING TO THIS CLASS?
EVERY DAY I STRESS THE FACT
THAT THIS IS NOT A
CLASS IN ORATORY.
THESE ARE DRAMAS.
THINGS ARE HAPPENING.
I WANT YOU TO GO BACK
AND READ THE PLAYS AGAIN.
AND THIS TIME, TRY TO...
TRY TO LISTEN FOR THE MEANING.
TOMORROW, WE SHALL
CONTINUE WITH OTHELLO,
THE STORY OF THE DOOMED
MOOR AND THE DRIVEN IAGO.
MRS. GARRETT SAYS
YOU HAVE 10 MINUTES,
THEN YOU HAVE TO COME OUT.
NATALIE, WHY ARE THERE
MONKEYS IN WITH THE PELICANS?
DO YOU HEAR YOURSELF, TOOTIE?
NAT, I TOLD YOU.
MAMMALS OVER THERE,
BIRDS AND REPTILES OVER HERE.
I HAVE A GREAT IDEA.
WHY DON'T WE BAKE A
COUPLE OF ROUND QUICHES
SO WE GET A CHANCE TO USE
THAT CASH-REGISTER-SHAPED
THINK OVER THERE?
WHAT WAS THIS?
IT WAS A HORSE,
BUT ITS LEG FELL OFF.
WANT ME TO SHOOT IT?
I CAN'T BELIEVE THE BILL I GOT
FROM THE FREEZER REPAIR MAN.
UNLESS HE CAMPED OUT OVERNIGHT,
I CAN'T JUSTIFY $87.50!
OH, AND BY THE WAY, GIRLS,
IF I WANT BUFFALO,
I'LL GO TO THE LONE PRAIRIE.
SHE SAYS THE ANIMALS GO, TOOTIE.
REALLY?
THE WHOLE HERD.
HEAD 'EM UP, MOVE 'EM OUT.
HEY, MRS. G, I GOT THE
WORD THAT RYAN IS KNOWN
FOR HIS BACK-TO-BACK QUIZZES.
I JUST THOUGHT YOU MIGHT
WANT TO KNOW THAT AFTER TODAY.
NOT THAT TODAY WAS
ANYTHING TO WORRY ABOUT.
OF COURSE NOT.
I WAS MY USUAL BUNGLING SELF.
NO, YOU WEREN'T.
SORRY. I WAS MY USUAL
ENTERTAINING SELF.
YOU KNOW, I'VE BEEN GETTING
SO MANY LAUGHS LATELY,
I'VE BEEN THINKING OF
CHANGING MY NAME TO SHECKY
AND TAKING MY
EDUCATION ON THE ROAD.
COME ON, YOU'RE STILL
FEELING YOU'RE WAY AROUND.
YOU'RE JUST GETTING
YOUR FEET WET.
MY FEET ARE SOAKED, JO,
AND THE WATER'S RISING.
I THINK YOU'RE
EXAGGERATING, MRS. G.
CAN YOU GIRLS MIND THE SHOP
WHILE I RUN OVER
TO THE BOOKSTORE?
I WAS THINKING IF I CAN GET
A REFUND ON THESE BOOKS,
I'LL BE ABLE TO PAY
FOR THE FREEZER.
WAIT A MINUTE.
YOU'RE DROPPING OUT?
NO. I'M WALKING OUT
WITH INCREDIBLE DIGNITY.
IT WAS CRAZY OF ME TO THINK I
COULD HANDLE COLLEGE RIGHT NOW.
I'VE GOT A BUSINESS TO RUN,
AND IT'S BEING NEGLECTED.
THE BUSINESS IS FINE.
WELL, IT'S NOT
JUST THE BUSINESS,
IT'S-IT'S MY PERSONAL LIFE.
I DON'T HAVE TIME TO
GO TO THE CLEANERS.
I NEVER GET TO THE POST OFFICE.
YOU'RE GIVING UP YOUR EDUCATION
SO YOU CAN BUY STAMPS?
MAKES SENSE.
THERE ARE OTHER FACTORS!
THERE ARE CONSIDERATIONS.
THERE ARE IMPLICATIONS.
I JUST DON'T THINK I CAN DO IT.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN?
SCHOOL. SCHOOL.
I DON'T THINK I CAN DO IT.
LOOK, YOU JUST HAD A BAD DAY.
OH, BELIEVE ME, BLAIR,
I CAN HANDLE A
BAD DAY, BUT THIS...
I NEVER WORRIED ABOUT
BIRTHDAYS OR GRAY HAIR.
I REALLY DIDN'T THINK OF
MYSELF AS CHANGING VERY MUCH.
BUT NOW, I WALK
INTO THAT CLASSROOM,
AND I LOOK AT ALL
THOSE YOUNG FACES,
AND I KNOW I DON'T BELONG THERE.
I DON'T UNDERSTAND
THE REFERENCES.
THE TEACHING
METHODS ARE DIFFERENT.
I FEEL SO... UNCOMFORTABLE.
THINGS WILL CHANGE.
IN A FEW WEEKS, YOU'LL
FEEL LIKE ONE OF THE GUYS.
OR MAYBE YOU WON'T.
BUT IF YOU LOVE
WHAT YOU'RE DOING,
THE REST IS WORTH IT.
WELL...
I DON'T KNOW IF IT
IS TO ME ANYMORE.
I DON'T LIKE DOUBTING MYSELF.
AND ALL OF A SUDDEN,
I'M STARTING TO FEEL
LIKE I'M NOT AS
SHARP AS I USED TO BE,
OR MY MEMORY ISN'T AS GOOD.
I WANTED THIS
EDUCATION... SO MUCH.
BUT... MAYBE I WAITED TOO LONG.
I DON'T KNOW IF IT'S WORTH IT.
LOOK, MRS. G, I'LL ADMIT
I DON'T KNOW EXACTLY
WHAT YOU'RE GOING THROUGH,
BUT I DO KNOW ABOUT
LOSING CONFIDENCE,
AND THAT CAN HAPPEN ANYTIME.
I CAN UNDERSTAND INSECURITY.
I'VE NEVER EXPERIENCED IT,
BUT I CAN UNDERSTAND IT.
LOOK, YOU KNOW MORE ABOUT
SHAKESPEARE AND EVERYTHING ELSE
THAN ANYBODY IN THAT CLASS.
YOU'LL SUCCEED IF YOU'LL
JUST GIVE YOURSELF THE CHANCE.
IT'S YOUR DECISION.
WE JUST WANT YOU TO BE HAPPY.
[BELL RINGS]
MY TIMER.
[BELL STOPS]
HAVE YOU READ THE
LAST HALF OF MACBETH?
YEAH. THAT LAST
SPEECH OF HIS IS A BEAR.
THERE'S A LOT I DIDN'T GET.
WELL, THEN LET'S
JUST READ IT AGAIN.
"TOMORROW AND
TOMORROW AND TOMORROW
"CREEPS IN THIS PETTY
PACE FROM DAY TO DAY
"TO THE LAST SYLLABLE
OF RECORDED TIME,
"AND ALL OUR YESTERDAYS
"HAVE LIGHTED FOOLS
THE WAY TO DUSTY DEATH.
"OUT, OUT, BRIEF CANDLE.
"LIFE'S BUT A WALKING SHADOW.
"A POOR PLAYER
"THAT STRUTS AND FRETS HIS HOUR
"UPON THE STAGE,
"AND THEN IS HEARD NO MORE.
"IT IS A TALE...
"FULL OF SOUND AND FURY
SIGNIFYING NOTHING."