The Dukes of Hazzard (1979–1985): Season 3, Episode 1 - Carnival of Thrills - full transcript
Shapely carnival stunt show operator Diane Benson offers Bo the opportunity of a lifetime: Being the star of the headline act. The act involves a stunt driver jumping over a row of 32 cars. Luke investigates Diane's background and learns that several previous accidents involving the car-jumping act were no accidents. When he comes forward with his findings, Bo refuses to believe Luke, leading to a huge fight that could split the Duke family apart.
On the Dukes, a Carnival of Thrills
invades Hazzard County.
Which is nothing new to the Dukes.
You're just lucky
that we're in Uncle Jesse's house.
We can always step outside.
We need a top stunt driver
to make a 32-car jump.
Judgment day is nigh.
Where are we gonna find another sucker...
to make the Leap for Life
when we get to Hazzard?
That's not till next week.
Believe me, I'll find some local country boy
begging for the chance by then.
I just thought that maybe for once
I'd found myself a real man.
Lady, maybe for once, you have.
Bo Duke can't make that jump
without that orange car of his.
-The General Lee?
-Yeah, the General Lee.
So, steal it, wreck it,
confiscate it. Whatever.
-To the carnival.
-And to us.
From the sound of the General,
it sounds all rescued and raring to go.
No thanks to Luke.
The General got impounded...
and Luke here didn't lift a finger
to help him out.
That may be so.
It was him who got us into all this mess
because some lady made a pass at him.
I don't have to
take that from you or anybody.
You're just lucky that we're
in Uncle Jesse's house, that's all.
You're unlucky,
'cause we can always step outside.
NOW, boys!
You just simmer down...
before you do something
you'll regret the rest of your lives.
Uncle Jesse,
I ain't got no regrets about nothing.
Specially not this.
Cousin, you just started something
you ain't half man enough to finish.
Stop it, Bo, Luke!
-Uncle Jesse, make them stop.
-Daisy, you're wasting your breath.
They're hurting each other. Stop!
There's only one way to stop this thing.
BOYS!
All right.
Now get up on your feet,
stop acting like jackasses...
and apologize to each other.
All right, I'm sorry.
I guess maybe I spoke out of turn.
You're dang right you did.
I ain't shaking your dang hand, either.
Not till you take back
every word you said about Diane.
All I said is she's been around some,
and mayhem.
Maybe she's just a little
out of your league, that's all.
I reckon that's for me to decide, isn't it?
Bo, you can't let a girl
come between you and Luke.
Daisy, I'm sorry.
I guess this farm's just gotten
a bit too small for both me and Luke.
-Uncle Jesse, stop him.
-No.
There's some things
a man's gotta learn for himself.
I guess this is one of the more important.
What you've just seen
is more than a dang fool in love.
It was a piece of Hazzard history.
It was the first time Duke fought Duke
since the war between the States.
I know you don't wanna be lectured to...
but there's a couple of things
I want you to take with you.
The first one is:
I want you to know I love you dearly.
The other one is:
Whenever you get through
doing whatever it is you gotta do...
realize that this is your home.
You can always come back.
Uncle Jesse, I reckon...
it's Luke that's gotta do
some of the realizing.
Friends, just remember:
pride is one terrible master.
Here, maybe this will cool you off.
That was quite an entrance.
I'm sorry, I didn't mean that.
I just got something
I've gotta get off my mind.
Could you loan me $250?
I've gotta make a down payment
on my cousin's half of the General Lee.
I think we could manage it.
Tickets have been selling pretty good.
Especially since the local people found out
you're gonna be the one making the jump.
Got something else on your mind?
You know that extra RV you said you had?
Is that offer still good?
It's yours.
Although I don't think
you'll be spending a lot of time there.
Bye-bye now.
His name is Bo Duke.
Looks like Bo's getting in
deeper over his head every minute.
A typical Duke.
Suspect appears to be using
the same MO she used...
on the previous times.
Father, we ask that you
bring this family back together again.
As soon as you see fit.
-Amen.
-Amen.
Everybody, dig in.
I'm sorry, Uncle Jesse, I just ain't hungry.
Daisy, it ain't gonna do Bo no good...
if we just worry ourselves sick about him.
Something changes in a man
when he's in love.
I don't care what name you put on it.
It can't be love
if it comes between a man and his family.
Boss, this is Sheriff Rosco P. Coltrane...
you got your ears on, little buddy?
I got something sweet
for your ears if you have.
My ears are already
full of something sweet.
Namely, this diet gelatin
I'm trying to eat...
in order to reduce to my TV image.
You stay with it, little fat buddy...
'cause I'll tell you this, you're gonna
need that slimmed-down image...
'cause you're gonna take over that show.
You mean you arrested them Duke boys?
You're not half right.
You mean you arrested
one of them Duke boys?
You better call that a quarter right.
I do have Enos all ready for the attack.
Who's there?
It's Enos.
-Come on in, Enos. How are you doing?
-Pretty good. How're you doing?
You got anything to eat?
We got ourselves an extra place.
No, I appreciate the gesture.
It'd do us a world of good
to see a friendly face around here.
-It sure ain't gonna be mine.
-ls Bo all right?
I reckon he's all right, Uncle Jesse.
But, Luke, you're under arrest
for assault and battery...
of that crane operator
at the Hazzard junkyard.
Come on. Put them away.
Hold these, please. I'm sorry.
Enos, please.
"One: you have the right to remain quiet.
Two: if you give up the right--"
Spare us, all right?
I've heard that thing so many times,
I know it up and down and inside out.
You picked a heck of a time to do this...
what with Bo
needing all the help he can get.
See you later.
It sure looks good. I'm sorry.
What do we do now?
I'd say the first thing we gotta do
is get Luke back.
All right, Bo Duke, freeze!
Sure, Rosco.
-Freeze it right there. I've got you.
-Got me for what?
Rosco, are you crazy?
You can't arrest me
for a driving violation on the fairgrounds.
No. What I got you for
is a crime of stealing county property.
Namely, one orange-colored vehicle,
better known as the General Lee.
Rosco, you've definitely gone senile.
Everyone in Hazzard County knows
this here car belongs to me and Luke.
I've got you for un-impounding it
out of the junkyard...
without paying the impounding fee
or getting an impounding certificate.
Come on, I'm gonna
take you to the slammer...
and hold the General Lee behind.
Wait a minute. Can he do that?
Yeah, he can do anything he wants
as long as he's got that dirty badge on.
You ought to see if Boss
will clean that thing--
Rosco, will you stop
before you shoot your blang foot off?
Hush. Come on.
Let's go. Don't hold my hand.
Don't resist arrest.
See what your vehicle did?
Done scuffed mine.
-Now you've done it, Rosco.
-Get in there.
I'm serious now.
Probably just scuffed the heck out of it.
Well, I've been wanting the boys
to get back together.
I hate to do this to you.
This way, you got Luke to talk to.
What am I supposed to say to him?
"Thanks for not getting the receipt
for the impound money"?
There would've been no need
for impound money at all...
if you hadn't let that girl
talk you into making that fool stunt.
-You're pushing it. Will you just shut up--
-I don't want to hear any more--
What about me?
Well, what do you know, Rosco?
You are witnessing a great
historical moment in Hazzard County:
Duke fighting Duke.
I tell you, it is a red-letter day, Boss.
You mean green-letter day, don't you?
-Green?
-Yeah, like in money.
Which is what it's gonna take
to get them boys out of jail on bail.
$500, for each.
Which I just happen to know
they just don't happen to have.
I do.
-Unlock pretty boy's cell there.
-What?
You can count this
while you make out the bail receipt.
That's $500.
$500? No, I said $5,000, didn't I?
You said $500.
-Didn't I?
-No, you said $500.
You mean you're dang fool enough...
to risk your hard-earned money
on the likes of Bo Duke?
That's right. He sells tickets,
and we need an audience.
-Cut him loose.
-My pleasure.
-What about Luke?
-That's your problem.
Come on, pretty boy.
Sorry, Luke.
After I make that jump on Saturday,
maybe I'll be nice enough...
to arrange somebody to bail you out.
Don't bother, all right?
I'd stay in here till I was Uncle Jesse's age
before I'd take a dime of your money.
Now, let's see. If Bo don't make the jump,
he can't get Luke out of jail.
And Luke's too proud to go anyway.
I used to have a team of mules like that.
Carl, I guess I had you all wrong.
Thanks for bailing me and the General out.
You didn't have me all wrong.
I would've let you rot in there
if it weren't for your girlfriend.
I'll have to run right over there
and thank her personal-like, won't I?
Don't be too personal about it...
or you won't last any longer with Diane
than me or any of the others.
Thanks a lot, Carl.
I'll try to remember that.
You do that, lover boy.
Meantime I'll keep my eyes peeled
for some other sucker to take your place.
Thank you. Bye now.
Sorry I had to borrow on you, Di
but it's for a good cause.
We got good news and bad news.
The good news is we got together $500
to bail one of you out.
We didn't have to make a choice about it...
'cause the carnival people beat us to it
by bailing out Bo.
I sure wish they hadn't, too.
'Cause Bo would be
a lot safer herein the cell...
than at the fairgrounds
trying to make that big old jump Saturday.
Hold on a second.
You said there was good news and bad.
The bad news?
It don't look like we're gonna finish...
that checker game, Luke,
and I was winning.
Don't speak too soon.
You forgot to king me.
He was taught by an expert.
The champion.
Possum on a gum bush.
How in the world did he do that?
No sooner than Uncle Jesse and Daisy
got Luke sprung out of Iron City...
they sprung another surprise on him.
Did you forget the way back to the farm?
We ain't going to the farm.
We're headed to the fairgrounds
to try and talk some sense into Bo's head.
That'll be the day.
Now, Luke, Bo might be
acting a little stupid these days...
but he ain't the first man
to be smitten by a woman.
Uncle Jesse, it's a waste of time.
Anybody who's fool enough...
to let a girl like that
come between him and his family...
doesn't even deserve to be called a Duke.
Daisy, stop the car.
-What?
-Just turn it off!
Okay.
-Get out!
-What for?
Just get out here.
Couple of things
you and me have got to settle.
Now then. If there's one thing
I taught you boys...
it's that there's two sides
to every argument.
All right. This time Bo's on the wrong side.
Is he? His excuse is that he's in love.
What's yours?
I don't take kindly to getting punched
in the face for speaking my mind.
So your pride's been hurt?
And you gotta strike out
and hit something.
All right. Hit me.
Uncle Jesse, you know I can't.
Why not? I'd rather see you hit me
than go through the pain...
of watching you two hit each other.
Now, listen to me.
Us Dukes ain't got much
when it comes to worldly goods...
but we got something more important.
We got love and respect for each other
that binds us together like glue.
Us Dukes is one.
So just put them up.
'Cause I'll tell you what.
I ain't about to stand aside
and see my family...
torn apart by a couple of hotheads...
that think that they got no more sense
than a chicken raiding a fox's den.
It ain't funny.
All right, Uncle Jesse, you win.
I was hotheaded, I was a jackass.
I can see the only thing we got is a family.
What a family!
All we gotta do is convince Bo
that the family's the important thing.
Come on, hop in. Let's go.
-Get in there!
-All right, I'm going.
Start her up, Daisy. Come on,
Uncle Jesse, get in, for Pete's sake.
You know, it is kind of funny.
Why don't you move this over
on top of the blue one?
Howdy, Miss Benson.
We came by to see Bo.
I don't think you had the pleasure
of meeting my Uncle Jesse.
-How do you do, ma'am?
-Pleasure to meet you, Mr. Duke.
Now I see where you boys
get your good looks from.
And I see why Bo is so taken with you.
You got a way of sweet-talking a man.
Now, if you don't mind,
we'd like a word with him ourselves.
You're gonna try and
talk him into quitting the show?
You bet we are, ma'am.
And we want you to know about it...
because us Dukes don't believe in
talking behind somebody's back.
I don't believe in forcing anyone
into doing anything they don't want to do.
Good.
So I won't even try
to stop you from dissuading him.
Now that we've got all our cards
on the table, why don't we just--
You're gonna have to wait a minute.
He's about to do a practice run.
-Excuse me. He's checking the ramp.
-Yeah, sure.
All right, everyone off the tracks.
Clear the tracks!
-Are you all right?
-Yeah, I'm fine.
Just another 20 feet
and I'd have really messed it up.
I'm doing fine. What're you doing here?
Afraid I'll crash the General
before I pay you your half?
I was afraid you'd bust your neck
before I pound some sense into it.
You two, cool it!
I'm getting tired of all this backbiting.
Now, shake hands and make up
before I whip you both. I can do it.
Mean it.
I'm sorry, Bo. I guess I ain't
been too long on understanding lately.
Well, that didn't give me no call
to throw the first punch.
-Sorry.
-We're all family again.
Speaking of family,
it's going to take three good men...
-to plow and plant that back 40.
-It sure will, Cousin.
-Then we can count on you.
-You sure can.
With all that money I'll make
doing that stunt driving...
I'll be able to get you all enough hands
to do 400, 500 acres at least.
Jesse, I can't talk anymore.
Let us know when you get the hands.
Yes, sir.
I think maybe we should've
left Daisy back there.
What for?
She could've talked
a little sense into Bo's head.
I don't think it'd do much good.
Luke's right. The only person
Bo's listening to right now is Diane.
We got company.
-I wonder if he's following us.
-There's one way to find out.
He's following us.
-But what for?
-Why don't we stop and ask him?
Now you caught us, how can we help you?
Who are you and what do you want?
The name's John Zimbra.
Special Investigator.
Southern Counties Insurance Company.
We hold the liability policy
on the Carnival of Thrills.
Then you're chasing after
the wrong Dukes.
It's our cousin Bo
who's making that big jump.
Does he know he's the fourth one
to try that in the last three months?
We all saw the last guy who tried it.
It was a pretty hairy accident.
If it was an accident.
All of the other drivers crashed
while trying the same stunt.
Are you inferring what we think you are?
My insurance company
thinks it was attempted murder.
And whoever tried that before
just might try it again.
Let's see if pretty boy's
as short on guts as he's on brains...
when he tries it this time.
You know, Bo ain't short of
neither guts or brains.
And he sure
better not be short of distance.
General Lee
was getting skittish and colicky.
Like he was warning old Bo
not to make that jump.
And Bo was having some hard thoughts
about the last man who tried it.
And you didn't think he had any guts.
He bailed out of that spot
like he's been doing it all his life.
I still think he lost his nerve
and pulled up short.
Now, tomorrow, there'll be 32 cars
lined up in front of that ramp.
And the stands will be full
of Hazzard people just whooping it up.
-One little distraction--
-Come on, Carl.
You sound as if
you don't want Bo to make it.
I just think the boy's in over his head.
I just don't know what's happening
with that dang General Lee...
but I promise I'll get him fixed
if it takes me all night.
We don't pay any overtime.
Maybe you can consider this
as part of a bonus.
All right! I'll tell you what.
Save the rest of that bonus
till after I make that jump tomorrow.
Then it ought to be worth
twice as much, won't it, Carl?
Bye-bye.
Man, I hate that kind of smile.
Anyway, the Dukes and Zimbra
went to Cedar City Hospital...
to talk with the last driver
who tried to make that jump.
Must be hard to be cheerful
in your spot, son.
We talked to the nurse and she said
you'll be as good as new in no time.
Only a little smarter, I hope.
We saw that jump you made.
Yeah. The takeoff was right on line.
What happened then?
Beats me.
I was hitting on all eight.
Then at the last second...
the engine up and quit on me.
Just like that? No warning or anything?
Mister, I tested that car
an hour before the jump.
I went over every inch of her.
She was in perfect condition.
She took sick awful sudden then.
You wouldn't happen to know
where they got the car now?
She should be over
at the Cedar City Garage.
Why don't we take a run over there?
Maybe we can figure out what happened.
-Make sure it don't happen to Bo.
-Yeah.
-Take care of yourself.
-Thank you.
-See you later.
-Bye-bye.
Back in Hazzard,
Bo thought he was in heaven.
That's exactly where he
might be winding up in a few more hours.
You all set for the big day?
Diane, I had my big day when I met you.
I hope you mean that, Bo.
Because I feel the same way about you.
You're gonna be dynamite out there
this afternoon.
You're gonna show those people a jump
like they've never seen before.
There she be.
3,500 pounds of Southern fried stock car.
I see you've pulled the transmission.
Why not? She was still sound as a dollar.
I can make you
a real good deal for it if you want.
Luke, if the transmission's still good...
then maybe it's got
something to do with the fuel line.
-Check that fuel line. It could be plugged.
-It could be.
Just the opposite, Uncle Jesse.
-What do you mean?
-Take a look at this.
That gas line wasn't worn through.
It was cut deliberate.
When he stepped on it
to go for that jump...
a lot more gas hit the ground
than made it to the carburetor.
That means Bob Dexter
didn't have no accident.
-That was...
-Attempted murder.
That's the third time it's happened
while somebody's tried to make that jump.
If we don't make it to Hazzard
in exactly 90 minutes...
Bo just might be the fourth.
Keep moving along, folks.
There's a lot of people behind you.
And the show's getting ready to start.
There are plenty of seats left.
All right. That's clean as country pine.
Cooter, the General
never sounded that good.
You're a genius, partner.
Least I could do, seeing as
how this one might be your last stunt.
Why don't we go back to the motor home
and relax a bit?
You've only got just over an hour
before you jump.
That sounds fine with me.
Thanks a lot, Cooter.
Good luck, Bo.
I'll see you later, Cooter.
I sure hope so.
Boss, I'm telling you,
there are more people buying tickets...
than are fleas on a old hound dog's tail.
That Bo Duke sure is packing them in.
Rosco, that's an awful thing to say...
to a man who's nursing
an empty stomach.
Listen, on that hot dog...
could you put double mustard,
onions, and lots of piccalilli?
Enos, I'm going to pick your lily.
Ain't you got no respect for the obese?
-I'm sorry, Mr. Hogg.
-I got hunger pangs like you don't know.
You want me
to get you a little snack, Mr. Hogg?
Like half a dozen corn dogs
and a mess of buttered popcorn?
No, I'm gonna hold on.
Maybe I'll just get lucky.
Maybe we'll have
a big rainstorm or blizzard.
Maybe even a tornado.
Nothing big, mind you.
Just big enough to make them
have to give these folks their money back.
I'm afraid you're out of luck, Boss.
There ain't a cloud in the sky.
Getting ward back to Hazzard
to stop that jump was a real problem.
The Sheriff's office didn't answer,
and the Boars Nest was closed.
And old Cooter was at the fairgrounds...
which didn't have no phone
in the first place.
There's no answer. What do I do now?
Hang it up. We got to roll.
You best let me drive.
If we don't cut a couple of corners,
and bend a few speeding laws...
we're liable to get there
just in time for Bo's funeral.
Now we know
what that nasty grin was a" about.
General, you've just met
your Appomattox.
Back at the fairgrounds,
they were warming up for the main event.
Just don't stand there, stonehead.
Can't you do something to stop the show?
How?
Arrest somebody.
On what charge?
I don't know. Invent one.
Like what?
Attempted suicide!
I know what I can get him on.
Being a human fire hazard.
And now Arlo will perform...
the spectacular Ring of Fire jump!
Looks like Arlo made it.
That's nothing
compared to the applause you'll hear...
when you make that 32-car jump.
This is just the beginning, Bo.
When word gets out about you,
we'll hit every state fair in the country.
Don't worry. You're gonna be great.
We're gonna spend the rest of our lives
listening to crowds applaud...together.
Remember, friends and neighbors,
when you trip in ta" cotton...
that's the time to look for snakes.
We're never gonna make it fast.
We got 20 more miles to go.
It's about half that as the crow flies.
That crow better fly fast,
or it'd be more like...
a vulture hovering over
what's left of Bo and the General.
Let's hang on.
This is the big one, folks.
Twice the excitement, twice the thrills,
twice the danger...
and twice the fun for everyone.
Let her rip, fellas.
Are you all right, honey child? Good girl!
Wow! Ding dang. Trust. You see that?
That crowd ain't
never ever gonna leave now.
I sure don't need no streamlined image.
Give me that.
Just 15 minutes, folks,
to the grand finale...
when the Carnival of Thrills
will attempt to set a new record...
by jumping 32, count them, folks,
parked vehicles.
And the man who will attempt
this daring death defying Leap for Life...
your good friend, Bo Duke!
This will take us right
to the back of the fairgrounds.
Then we will make it after all.
That bridge at Choctaw Gully's out.
How're we gonna get across?
It can't be but 30, 40 feet across.
Thirty, 40.
Mr. Zimbra, how does this car fly?
-Did we make it?
-What does it look like?
That's the closest I want to get to heaven
for the next 30 years.
We got to make it
through the next 30 seconds.
And now, ladies and gentlemen,
the moment you've all been waiting for.
Hazzard County's own Bo Duke...
will attempt
the breathtaking Leap for Life.
Dang it, Luke, if you don't get that car
out of my way...
I'll drive right over it and you.
Go ahead. That's about your speed.
You're really pushing it.
-Boys, stop it. Come on now.
-Daisy, you just stay out of this.
Rosco, do my eyes deceive me.
Or is that Luke trying to persuade Bo
not to make the jump?
They seem to be fussing.
Maybe our luck is turning.
Come on, let's go. Let's go get them.
Now, listen, you two,
I'm liable to take the both of you...
and put you over my knee
and whip some sense into you.
Uncle Jesse, he started it--
Luke wants to tell you something.
And I want you to stand there
and listen to him...
and I don't want to hear one peep
out of you, you understand?
-Yes, sir.
-All right.
All right. I'm gonna make this simple.
Remember what happened to the last guy
who tried this 32-car jump?
Sure I remember it.
What you don't know is that there were
two others before him.
All three of them tried it
and all three of them crashed...
because of some mechanical problem.
Oh, yeah. And all three of them
had something else in common, too.
-What?
-Your lady friend.
That's an out and out lie. You're doing
the lowest thing I've ever heard of.
Bo, when has Luke ever lied to you?
Daisy, I can prove it.
Go ahead, Diane. Go ahead, tell them.
Tell them how it is.
-It's not the way it sounds, Bo.
-Listen, I got to do this jump.
Would you please tell them how it is
so I can do it.
Okay, I'll level with you.
I was broke. Kind of desperate.
I needed a driver who could
bring in the local crowds.
You were it.
That's all I had in mind at first.
What about now?
Now I know you better.
I've realized you're somebody special,
different from the others.
I really like you, Bo.
I want you to believe that.
But the carnival comes first. Right?
I'm afraid so.
And I know you well enough to realize...
you're not gonna take a back seat
to anybody or anything.
Cooter, let's crack open that hood.
I got a sneaking suspicion.
Take a look at that gas line.
Hey, y'all.
-This here thing's been cut.
-Give me that.
Another 100 feet, you'd have been
dead on the water, buddy-roo.
Another 100 feet, I'd be
at the end of that ramp, now, wouldn't I?
Those others weren't accidents, son.
They were attempted murders.
That's impossible.
Who'd want to kill the star of the show?
Somebody that wanted to be the star?
Or somebody that had been a star...
and couldn't stand
to see himself being replaced.
Carl.
Hey, wait a minute!
He'll take care of it.
Time is fame, Luke!
Get up. Come on.
All right, now we've got him.
Take him away. I'll file the charges.
Yes, but couldn't it wait
till the jump's over?
Enos, you really think there's gonna be
a jump after all that's happened?
No, sir. I don't reckon. Thank goodness.
Enos, will you just take him
and lock him up?
Watch him, now. He's dangerous.
Somebody up there must really love me.
This is the microphone he was using.
Is this thing still working?
-Say, "Testing, one, two."
-Testing, one, two!
Fellow citizens of Hazzard County.
This is J.D. Hogg.
Bo, you have to believe me. I never knew.
...on account of there ain't gonna be
no 32-car jump, not nohow.
But don't you folks fret now.
As county commissioner,
I hereby declare...
that each and every one of you
is gonna get your ticket money back.
Well, Miss Benson.
I reckon you ain't gonna have
enough money now...
to pay the rental on my fairgrounds.
Which according to
this little agreement you signed...
entitles me to sell off your assets
to pay your debts.
Boss, it sounds to me
like you're working some sort of scam...
to cheat this little lady out of her carnival.
Are you gonna stick up for her
after what she's done?
All she did was let me make a jackass
out of myself out of my own conceit.
-Luke, I'm sorry.
-It's all right.
I just don't want to
fight with you anymore.
Give me that.
Listen, y'all don't go nowhere.
How long will it take
to fix that gas line on the General?
Five minutes, with my eyes closed.
We just wasted five seconds.
Well, buddy-roo,
Rome, Georgia wasn't built in a day.
-I'll get my tools.
-Good idea.
You're still willing to make that jump
after everything that's happened?
I gave you my word, now, didn't I?
You've got every reason not to help me.
I do, but...
Shoot, I don't see how I could love you
one minute and hurt you the next.
Uncle Jesse, ain't that beautiful?
Yeah, it's stupid, but it's beautiful.
I guess it's catching, Uncle Jesse.
Folks, this here is Luke Duke.
Now, you just sit tight...
'cause Bo's gonna do that jump
just like he promised.
I'm gonna be sitting right next to you.
See, this way, if I co-pilot,
he can keep his eyes on the road.
Luke, I don't know
whether to kiss you or kill you.
Sol guess I'm gonna kiss you.
Cooter, get this car out of here.
And now, the Carnival of Thrills...
presents the star attraction
of this afternoon:
Bo and Luke Duke.
In a death defying leap
aver 32 stacked vehicles...
in the center of the Hazzard County arena.
Cousin, I got to say, I'm glad I'm here.
I'm glad you're here, too.
Just keep your eye on that ramp.
Come on, Bo, you need more speed.
Come on, get up.
You need 10 more miles an hour.
Come on, Bo. We need 65.
Eating time.
There you are, Monsieur Hogg.
The little salad.
-That's for me?
-That's it.
Needs a little garnish.
Like this.
Boss decided to make up for his dieting
with a vengeance.
And that's how
the Carnival of Thrills left Hazzard...
without its star attraction.
I'm sorry, Bo.
-It could really have been wonderful.
-Diane, it was wonderful.
I wouldn't have missed it for anything.
I guess it's just like
Uncle Jesse always said.
You learn something new in everything.
You take care of yourself.
And Bo grew up a little.
And like all growing,
it wasn't without pain.
There you go, Daisy.
And Bo finally got to eat
his victory lunch...
of crawdad bisque
that Jesse had been saving for him.
Thank you, Lord, for bringing us
all back together again. Amen.
Yes, sir, amen.
Like fine wine, aging only improved it.
What's wrong?
It's the best crawdad bisque
we've ever had.
Pass the bread.
All the Dukes were finally back together.
Bonded even closer by adversity and love.
And I told y'all
that this was a love story, didn't I?
In Hazzard County
we tend to like happy endings.
Them Dukes!
English
invades Hazzard County.
Which is nothing new to the Dukes.
You're just lucky
that we're in Uncle Jesse's house.
We can always step outside.
We need a top stunt driver
to make a 32-car jump.
Judgment day is nigh.
Where are we gonna find another sucker...
to make the Leap for Life
when we get to Hazzard?
That's not till next week.
Believe me, I'll find some local country boy
begging for the chance by then.
I just thought that maybe for once
I'd found myself a real man.
Lady, maybe for once, you have.
Bo Duke can't make that jump
without that orange car of his.
-The General Lee?
-Yeah, the General Lee.
So, steal it, wreck it,
confiscate it. Whatever.
-To the carnival.
-And to us.
From the sound of the General,
it sounds all rescued and raring to go.
No thanks to Luke.
The General got impounded...
and Luke here didn't lift a finger
to help him out.
That may be so.
It was him who got us into all this mess
because some lady made a pass at him.
I don't have to
take that from you or anybody.
You're just lucky that we're
in Uncle Jesse's house, that's all.
You're unlucky,
'cause we can always step outside.
NOW, boys!
You just simmer down...
before you do something
you'll regret the rest of your lives.
Uncle Jesse,
I ain't got no regrets about nothing.
Specially not this.
Cousin, you just started something
you ain't half man enough to finish.
Stop it, Bo, Luke!
-Uncle Jesse, make them stop.
-Daisy, you're wasting your breath.
They're hurting each other. Stop!
There's only one way to stop this thing.
BOYS!
All right.
Now get up on your feet,
stop acting like jackasses...
and apologize to each other.
All right, I'm sorry.
I guess maybe I spoke out of turn.
You're dang right you did.
I ain't shaking your dang hand, either.
Not till you take back
every word you said about Diane.
All I said is she's been around some,
and mayhem.
Maybe she's just a little
out of your league, that's all.
I reckon that's for me to decide, isn't it?
Bo, you can't let a girl
come between you and Luke.
Daisy, I'm sorry.
I guess this farm's just gotten
a bit too small for both me and Luke.
-Uncle Jesse, stop him.
-No.
There's some things
a man's gotta learn for himself.
I guess this is one of the more important.
What you've just seen
is more than a dang fool in love.
It was a piece of Hazzard history.
It was the first time Duke fought Duke
since the war between the States.
I know you don't wanna be lectured to...
but there's a couple of things
I want you to take with you.
The first one is:
I want you to know I love you dearly.
The other one is:
Whenever you get through
doing whatever it is you gotta do...
realize that this is your home.
You can always come back.
Uncle Jesse, I reckon...
it's Luke that's gotta do
some of the realizing.
Friends, just remember:
pride is one terrible master.
Here, maybe this will cool you off.
That was quite an entrance.
I'm sorry, I didn't mean that.
I just got something
I've gotta get off my mind.
Could you loan me $250?
I've gotta make a down payment
on my cousin's half of the General Lee.
I think we could manage it.
Tickets have been selling pretty good.
Especially since the local people found out
you're gonna be the one making the jump.
Got something else on your mind?
You know that extra RV you said you had?
Is that offer still good?
It's yours.
Although I don't think
you'll be spending a lot of time there.
Bye-bye now.
His name is Bo Duke.
Looks like Bo's getting in
deeper over his head every minute.
A typical Duke.
Suspect appears to be using
the same MO she used...
on the previous times.
Father, we ask that you
bring this family back together again.
As soon as you see fit.
-Amen.
-Amen.
Everybody, dig in.
I'm sorry, Uncle Jesse, I just ain't hungry.
Daisy, it ain't gonna do Bo no good...
if we just worry ourselves sick about him.
Something changes in a man
when he's in love.
I don't care what name you put on it.
It can't be love
if it comes between a man and his family.
Boss, this is Sheriff Rosco P. Coltrane...
you got your ears on, little buddy?
I got something sweet
for your ears if you have.
My ears are already
full of something sweet.
Namely, this diet gelatin
I'm trying to eat...
in order to reduce to my TV image.
You stay with it, little fat buddy...
'cause I'll tell you this, you're gonna
need that slimmed-down image...
'cause you're gonna take over that show.
You mean you arrested them Duke boys?
You're not half right.
You mean you arrested
one of them Duke boys?
You better call that a quarter right.
I do have Enos all ready for the attack.
Who's there?
It's Enos.
-Come on in, Enos. How are you doing?
-Pretty good. How're you doing?
You got anything to eat?
We got ourselves an extra place.
No, I appreciate the gesture.
It'd do us a world of good
to see a friendly face around here.
-It sure ain't gonna be mine.
-ls Bo all right?
I reckon he's all right, Uncle Jesse.
But, Luke, you're under arrest
for assault and battery...
of that crane operator
at the Hazzard junkyard.
Come on. Put them away.
Hold these, please. I'm sorry.
Enos, please.
"One: you have the right to remain quiet.
Two: if you give up the right--"
Spare us, all right?
I've heard that thing so many times,
I know it up and down and inside out.
You picked a heck of a time to do this...
what with Bo
needing all the help he can get.
See you later.
It sure looks good. I'm sorry.
What do we do now?
I'd say the first thing we gotta do
is get Luke back.
All right, Bo Duke, freeze!
Sure, Rosco.
-Freeze it right there. I've got you.
-Got me for what?
Rosco, are you crazy?
You can't arrest me
for a driving violation on the fairgrounds.
No. What I got you for
is a crime of stealing county property.
Namely, one orange-colored vehicle,
better known as the General Lee.
Rosco, you've definitely gone senile.
Everyone in Hazzard County knows
this here car belongs to me and Luke.
I've got you for un-impounding it
out of the junkyard...
without paying the impounding fee
or getting an impounding certificate.
Come on, I'm gonna
take you to the slammer...
and hold the General Lee behind.
Wait a minute. Can he do that?
Yeah, he can do anything he wants
as long as he's got that dirty badge on.
You ought to see if Boss
will clean that thing--
Rosco, will you stop
before you shoot your blang foot off?
Hush. Come on.
Let's go. Don't hold my hand.
Don't resist arrest.
See what your vehicle did?
Done scuffed mine.
-Now you've done it, Rosco.
-Get in there.
I'm serious now.
Probably just scuffed the heck out of it.
Well, I've been wanting the boys
to get back together.
I hate to do this to you.
This way, you got Luke to talk to.
What am I supposed to say to him?
"Thanks for not getting the receipt
for the impound money"?
There would've been no need
for impound money at all...
if you hadn't let that girl
talk you into making that fool stunt.
-You're pushing it. Will you just shut up--
-I don't want to hear any more--
What about me?
Well, what do you know, Rosco?
You are witnessing a great
historical moment in Hazzard County:
Duke fighting Duke.
I tell you, it is a red-letter day, Boss.
You mean green-letter day, don't you?
-Green?
-Yeah, like in money.
Which is what it's gonna take
to get them boys out of jail on bail.
$500, for each.
Which I just happen to know
they just don't happen to have.
I do.
-Unlock pretty boy's cell there.
-What?
You can count this
while you make out the bail receipt.
That's $500.
$500? No, I said $5,000, didn't I?
You said $500.
-Didn't I?
-No, you said $500.
You mean you're dang fool enough...
to risk your hard-earned money
on the likes of Bo Duke?
That's right. He sells tickets,
and we need an audience.
-Cut him loose.
-My pleasure.
-What about Luke?
-That's your problem.
Come on, pretty boy.
Sorry, Luke.
After I make that jump on Saturday,
maybe I'll be nice enough...
to arrange somebody to bail you out.
Don't bother, all right?
I'd stay in here till I was Uncle Jesse's age
before I'd take a dime of your money.
Now, let's see. If Bo don't make the jump,
he can't get Luke out of jail.
And Luke's too proud to go anyway.
I used to have a team of mules like that.
Carl, I guess I had you all wrong.
Thanks for bailing me and the General out.
You didn't have me all wrong.
I would've let you rot in there
if it weren't for your girlfriend.
I'll have to run right over there
and thank her personal-like, won't I?
Don't be too personal about it...
or you won't last any longer with Diane
than me or any of the others.
Thanks a lot, Carl.
I'll try to remember that.
You do that, lover boy.
Meantime I'll keep my eyes peeled
for some other sucker to take your place.
Thank you. Bye now.
Sorry I had to borrow on you, Di
but it's for a good cause.
We got good news and bad news.
The good news is we got together $500
to bail one of you out.
We didn't have to make a choice about it...
'cause the carnival people beat us to it
by bailing out Bo.
I sure wish they hadn't, too.
'Cause Bo would be
a lot safer herein the cell...
than at the fairgrounds
trying to make that big old jump Saturday.
Hold on a second.
You said there was good news and bad.
The bad news?
It don't look like we're gonna finish...
that checker game, Luke,
and I was winning.
Don't speak too soon.
You forgot to king me.
He was taught by an expert.
The champion.
Possum on a gum bush.
How in the world did he do that?
No sooner than Uncle Jesse and Daisy
got Luke sprung out of Iron City...
they sprung another surprise on him.
Did you forget the way back to the farm?
We ain't going to the farm.
We're headed to the fairgrounds
to try and talk some sense into Bo's head.
That'll be the day.
Now, Luke, Bo might be
acting a little stupid these days...
but he ain't the first man
to be smitten by a woman.
Uncle Jesse, it's a waste of time.
Anybody who's fool enough...
to let a girl like that
come between him and his family...
doesn't even deserve to be called a Duke.
Daisy, stop the car.
-What?
-Just turn it off!
Okay.
-Get out!
-What for?
Just get out here.
Couple of things
you and me have got to settle.
Now then. If there's one thing
I taught you boys...
it's that there's two sides
to every argument.
All right. This time Bo's on the wrong side.
Is he? His excuse is that he's in love.
What's yours?
I don't take kindly to getting punched
in the face for speaking my mind.
So your pride's been hurt?
And you gotta strike out
and hit something.
All right. Hit me.
Uncle Jesse, you know I can't.
Why not? I'd rather see you hit me
than go through the pain...
of watching you two hit each other.
Now, listen to me.
Us Dukes ain't got much
when it comes to worldly goods...
but we got something more important.
We got love and respect for each other
that binds us together like glue.
Us Dukes is one.
So just put them up.
'Cause I'll tell you what.
I ain't about to stand aside
and see my family...
torn apart by a couple of hotheads...
that think that they got no more sense
than a chicken raiding a fox's den.
It ain't funny.
All right, Uncle Jesse, you win.
I was hotheaded, I was a jackass.
I can see the only thing we got is a family.
What a family!
All we gotta do is convince Bo
that the family's the important thing.
Come on, hop in. Let's go.
-Get in there!
-All right, I'm going.
Start her up, Daisy. Come on,
Uncle Jesse, get in, for Pete's sake.
You know, it is kind of funny.
Why don't you move this over
on top of the blue one?
Howdy, Miss Benson.
We came by to see Bo.
I don't think you had the pleasure
of meeting my Uncle Jesse.
-How do you do, ma'am?
-Pleasure to meet you, Mr. Duke.
Now I see where you boys
get your good looks from.
And I see why Bo is so taken with you.
You got a way of sweet-talking a man.
Now, if you don't mind,
we'd like a word with him ourselves.
You're gonna try and
talk him into quitting the show?
You bet we are, ma'am.
And we want you to know about it...
because us Dukes don't believe in
talking behind somebody's back.
I don't believe in forcing anyone
into doing anything they don't want to do.
Good.
So I won't even try
to stop you from dissuading him.
Now that we've got all our cards
on the table, why don't we just--
You're gonna have to wait a minute.
He's about to do a practice run.
-Excuse me. He's checking the ramp.
-Yeah, sure.
All right, everyone off the tracks.
Clear the tracks!
-Are you all right?
-Yeah, I'm fine.
Just another 20 feet
and I'd have really messed it up.
I'm doing fine. What're you doing here?
Afraid I'll crash the General
before I pay you your half?
I was afraid you'd bust your neck
before I pound some sense into it.
You two, cool it!
I'm getting tired of all this backbiting.
Now, shake hands and make up
before I whip you both. I can do it.
Mean it.
I'm sorry, Bo. I guess I ain't
been too long on understanding lately.
Well, that didn't give me no call
to throw the first punch.
-Sorry.
-We're all family again.
Speaking of family,
it's going to take three good men...
-to plow and plant that back 40.
-It sure will, Cousin.
-Then we can count on you.
-You sure can.
With all that money I'll make
doing that stunt driving...
I'll be able to get you all enough hands
to do 400, 500 acres at least.
Jesse, I can't talk anymore.
Let us know when you get the hands.
Yes, sir.
I think maybe we should've
left Daisy back there.
What for?
She could've talked
a little sense into Bo's head.
I don't think it'd do much good.
Luke's right. The only person
Bo's listening to right now is Diane.
We got company.
-I wonder if he's following us.
-There's one way to find out.
He's following us.
-But what for?
-Why don't we stop and ask him?
Now you caught us, how can we help you?
Who are you and what do you want?
The name's John Zimbra.
Special Investigator.
Southern Counties Insurance Company.
We hold the liability policy
on the Carnival of Thrills.
Then you're chasing after
the wrong Dukes.
It's our cousin Bo
who's making that big jump.
Does he know he's the fourth one
to try that in the last three months?
We all saw the last guy who tried it.
It was a pretty hairy accident.
If it was an accident.
All of the other drivers crashed
while trying the same stunt.
Are you inferring what we think you are?
My insurance company
thinks it was attempted murder.
And whoever tried that before
just might try it again.
Let's see if pretty boy's
as short on guts as he's on brains...
when he tries it this time.
You know, Bo ain't short of
neither guts or brains.
And he sure
better not be short of distance.
General Lee
was getting skittish and colicky.
Like he was warning old Bo
not to make that jump.
And Bo was having some hard thoughts
about the last man who tried it.
And you didn't think he had any guts.
He bailed out of that spot
like he's been doing it all his life.
I still think he lost his nerve
and pulled up short.
Now, tomorrow, there'll be 32 cars
lined up in front of that ramp.
And the stands will be full
of Hazzard people just whooping it up.
-One little distraction--
-Come on, Carl.
You sound as if
you don't want Bo to make it.
I just think the boy's in over his head.
I just don't know what's happening
with that dang General Lee...
but I promise I'll get him fixed
if it takes me all night.
We don't pay any overtime.
Maybe you can consider this
as part of a bonus.
All right! I'll tell you what.
Save the rest of that bonus
till after I make that jump tomorrow.
Then it ought to be worth
twice as much, won't it, Carl?
Bye-bye.
Man, I hate that kind of smile.
Anyway, the Dukes and Zimbra
went to Cedar City Hospital...
to talk with the last driver
who tried to make that jump.
Must be hard to be cheerful
in your spot, son.
We talked to the nurse and she said
you'll be as good as new in no time.
Only a little smarter, I hope.
We saw that jump you made.
Yeah. The takeoff was right on line.
What happened then?
Beats me.
I was hitting on all eight.
Then at the last second...
the engine up and quit on me.
Just like that? No warning or anything?
Mister, I tested that car
an hour before the jump.
I went over every inch of her.
She was in perfect condition.
She took sick awful sudden then.
You wouldn't happen to know
where they got the car now?
She should be over
at the Cedar City Garage.
Why don't we take a run over there?
Maybe we can figure out what happened.
-Make sure it don't happen to Bo.
-Yeah.
-Take care of yourself.
-Thank you.
-See you later.
-Bye-bye.
Back in Hazzard,
Bo thought he was in heaven.
That's exactly where he
might be winding up in a few more hours.
You all set for the big day?
Diane, I had my big day when I met you.
I hope you mean that, Bo.
Because I feel the same way about you.
You're gonna be dynamite out there
this afternoon.
You're gonna show those people a jump
like they've never seen before.
There she be.
3,500 pounds of Southern fried stock car.
I see you've pulled the transmission.
Why not? She was still sound as a dollar.
I can make you
a real good deal for it if you want.
Luke, if the transmission's still good...
then maybe it's got
something to do with the fuel line.
-Check that fuel line. It could be plugged.
-It could be.
Just the opposite, Uncle Jesse.
-What do you mean?
-Take a look at this.
That gas line wasn't worn through.
It was cut deliberate.
When he stepped on it
to go for that jump...
a lot more gas hit the ground
than made it to the carburetor.
That means Bob Dexter
didn't have no accident.
-That was...
-Attempted murder.
That's the third time it's happened
while somebody's tried to make that jump.
If we don't make it to Hazzard
in exactly 90 minutes...
Bo just might be the fourth.
Keep moving along, folks.
There's a lot of people behind you.
And the show's getting ready to start.
There are plenty of seats left.
All right. That's clean as country pine.
Cooter, the General
never sounded that good.
You're a genius, partner.
Least I could do, seeing as
how this one might be your last stunt.
Why don't we go back to the motor home
and relax a bit?
You've only got just over an hour
before you jump.
That sounds fine with me.
Thanks a lot, Cooter.
Good luck, Bo.
I'll see you later, Cooter.
I sure hope so.
Boss, I'm telling you,
there are more people buying tickets...
than are fleas on a old hound dog's tail.
That Bo Duke sure is packing them in.
Rosco, that's an awful thing to say...
to a man who's nursing
an empty stomach.
Listen, on that hot dog...
could you put double mustard,
onions, and lots of piccalilli?
Enos, I'm going to pick your lily.
Ain't you got no respect for the obese?
-I'm sorry, Mr. Hogg.
-I got hunger pangs like you don't know.
You want me
to get you a little snack, Mr. Hogg?
Like half a dozen corn dogs
and a mess of buttered popcorn?
No, I'm gonna hold on.
Maybe I'll just get lucky.
Maybe we'll have
a big rainstorm or blizzard.
Maybe even a tornado.
Nothing big, mind you.
Just big enough to make them
have to give these folks their money back.
I'm afraid you're out of luck, Boss.
There ain't a cloud in the sky.
Getting ward back to Hazzard
to stop that jump was a real problem.
The Sheriff's office didn't answer,
and the Boars Nest was closed.
And old Cooter was at the fairgrounds...
which didn't have no phone
in the first place.
There's no answer. What do I do now?
Hang it up. We got to roll.
You best let me drive.
If we don't cut a couple of corners,
and bend a few speeding laws...
we're liable to get there
just in time for Bo's funeral.
Now we know
what that nasty grin was a" about.
General, you've just met
your Appomattox.
Back at the fairgrounds,
they were warming up for the main event.
Just don't stand there, stonehead.
Can't you do something to stop the show?
How?
Arrest somebody.
On what charge?
I don't know. Invent one.
Like what?
Attempted suicide!
I know what I can get him on.
Being a human fire hazard.
And now Arlo will perform...
the spectacular Ring of Fire jump!
Looks like Arlo made it.
That's nothing
compared to the applause you'll hear...
when you make that 32-car jump.
This is just the beginning, Bo.
When word gets out about you,
we'll hit every state fair in the country.
Don't worry. You're gonna be great.
We're gonna spend the rest of our lives
listening to crowds applaud...together.
Remember, friends and neighbors,
when you trip in ta" cotton...
that's the time to look for snakes.
We're never gonna make it fast.
We got 20 more miles to go.
It's about half that as the crow flies.
That crow better fly fast,
or it'd be more like...
a vulture hovering over
what's left of Bo and the General.
Let's hang on.
This is the big one, folks.
Twice the excitement, twice the thrills,
twice the danger...
and twice the fun for everyone.
Let her rip, fellas.
Are you all right, honey child? Good girl!
Wow! Ding dang. Trust. You see that?
That crowd ain't
never ever gonna leave now.
I sure don't need no streamlined image.
Give me that.
Just 15 minutes, folks,
to the grand finale...
when the Carnival of Thrills
will attempt to set a new record...
by jumping 32, count them, folks,
parked vehicles.
And the man who will attempt
this daring death defying Leap for Life...
your good friend, Bo Duke!
This will take us right
to the back of the fairgrounds.
Then we will make it after all.
That bridge at Choctaw Gully's out.
How're we gonna get across?
It can't be but 30, 40 feet across.
Thirty, 40.
Mr. Zimbra, how does this car fly?
-Did we make it?
-What does it look like?
That's the closest I want to get to heaven
for the next 30 years.
We got to make it
through the next 30 seconds.
And now, ladies and gentlemen,
the moment you've all been waiting for.
Hazzard County's own Bo Duke...
will attempt
the breathtaking Leap for Life.
Dang it, Luke, if you don't get that car
out of my way...
I'll drive right over it and you.
Go ahead. That's about your speed.
You're really pushing it.
-Boys, stop it. Come on now.
-Daisy, you just stay out of this.
Rosco, do my eyes deceive me.
Or is that Luke trying to persuade Bo
not to make the jump?
They seem to be fussing.
Maybe our luck is turning.
Come on, let's go. Let's go get them.
Now, listen, you two,
I'm liable to take the both of you...
and put you over my knee
and whip some sense into you.
Uncle Jesse, he started it--
Luke wants to tell you something.
And I want you to stand there
and listen to him...
and I don't want to hear one peep
out of you, you understand?
-Yes, sir.
-All right.
All right. I'm gonna make this simple.
Remember what happened to the last guy
who tried this 32-car jump?
Sure I remember it.
What you don't know is that there were
two others before him.
All three of them tried it
and all three of them crashed...
because of some mechanical problem.
Oh, yeah. And all three of them
had something else in common, too.
-What?
-Your lady friend.
That's an out and out lie. You're doing
the lowest thing I've ever heard of.
Bo, when has Luke ever lied to you?
Daisy, I can prove it.
Go ahead, Diane. Go ahead, tell them.
Tell them how it is.
-It's not the way it sounds, Bo.
-Listen, I got to do this jump.
Would you please tell them how it is
so I can do it.
Okay, I'll level with you.
I was broke. Kind of desperate.
I needed a driver who could
bring in the local crowds.
You were it.
That's all I had in mind at first.
What about now?
Now I know you better.
I've realized you're somebody special,
different from the others.
I really like you, Bo.
I want you to believe that.
But the carnival comes first. Right?
I'm afraid so.
And I know you well enough to realize...
you're not gonna take a back seat
to anybody or anything.
Cooter, let's crack open that hood.
I got a sneaking suspicion.
Take a look at that gas line.
Hey, y'all.
-This here thing's been cut.
-Give me that.
Another 100 feet, you'd have been
dead on the water, buddy-roo.
Another 100 feet, I'd be
at the end of that ramp, now, wouldn't I?
Those others weren't accidents, son.
They were attempted murders.
That's impossible.
Who'd want to kill the star of the show?
Somebody that wanted to be the star?
Or somebody that had been a star...
and couldn't stand
to see himself being replaced.
Carl.
Hey, wait a minute!
He'll take care of it.
Time is fame, Luke!
Get up. Come on.
All right, now we've got him.
Take him away. I'll file the charges.
Yes, but couldn't it wait
till the jump's over?
Enos, you really think there's gonna be
a jump after all that's happened?
No, sir. I don't reckon. Thank goodness.
Enos, will you just take him
and lock him up?
Watch him, now. He's dangerous.
Somebody up there must really love me.
This is the microphone he was using.
Is this thing still working?
-Say, "Testing, one, two."
-Testing, one, two!
Fellow citizens of Hazzard County.
This is J.D. Hogg.
Bo, you have to believe me. I never knew.
...on account of there ain't gonna be
no 32-car jump, not nohow.
But don't you folks fret now.
As county commissioner,
I hereby declare...
that each and every one of you
is gonna get your ticket money back.
Well, Miss Benson.
I reckon you ain't gonna have
enough money now...
to pay the rental on my fairgrounds.
Which according to
this little agreement you signed...
entitles me to sell off your assets
to pay your debts.
Boss, it sounds to me
like you're working some sort of scam...
to cheat this little lady out of her carnival.
Are you gonna stick up for her
after what she's done?
All she did was let me make a jackass
out of myself out of my own conceit.
-Luke, I'm sorry.
-It's all right.
I just don't want to
fight with you anymore.
Give me that.
Listen, y'all don't go nowhere.
How long will it take
to fix that gas line on the General?
Five minutes, with my eyes closed.
We just wasted five seconds.
Well, buddy-roo,
Rome, Georgia wasn't built in a day.
-I'll get my tools.
-Good idea.
You're still willing to make that jump
after everything that's happened?
I gave you my word, now, didn't I?
You've got every reason not to help me.
I do, but...
Shoot, I don't see how I could love you
one minute and hurt you the next.
Uncle Jesse, ain't that beautiful?
Yeah, it's stupid, but it's beautiful.
I guess it's catching, Uncle Jesse.
Folks, this here is Luke Duke.
Now, you just sit tight...
'cause Bo's gonna do that jump
just like he promised.
I'm gonna be sitting right next to you.
See, this way, if I co-pilot,
he can keep his eyes on the road.
Luke, I don't know
whether to kiss you or kill you.
Sol guess I'm gonna kiss you.
Cooter, get this car out of here.
And now, the Carnival of Thrills...
presents the star attraction
of this afternoon:
Bo and Luke Duke.
In a death defying leap
aver 32 stacked vehicles...
in the center of the Hazzard County arena.
Cousin, I got to say, I'm glad I'm here.
I'm glad you're here, too.
Just keep your eye on that ramp.
Come on, Bo, you need more speed.
Come on, get up.
You need 10 more miles an hour.
Come on, Bo. We need 65.
Eating time.
There you are, Monsieur Hogg.
The little salad.
-That's for me?
-That's it.
Needs a little garnish.
Like this.
Boss decided to make up for his dieting
with a vengeance.
And that's how
the Carnival of Thrills left Hazzard...
without its star attraction.
I'm sorry, Bo.
-It could really have been wonderful.
-Diane, it was wonderful.
I wouldn't have missed it for anything.
I guess it's just like
Uncle Jesse always said.
You learn something new in everything.
You take care of yourself.
And Bo grew up a little.
And like all growing,
it wasn't without pain.
There you go, Daisy.
And Bo finally got to eat
his victory lunch...
of crawdad bisque
that Jesse had been saving for him.
Thank you, Lord, for bringing us
all back together again. Amen.
Yes, sir, amen.
Like fine wine, aging only improved it.
What's wrong?
It's the best crawdad bisque
we've ever had.
Pass the bread.
All the Dukes were finally back together.
Bonded even closer by adversity and love.
And I told y'all
that this was a love story, didn't I?
In Hazzard County
we tend to like happy endings.
Them Dukes!
English