The Boss Baby: Back in Business (2018–…): Season 1, Episode 9 - Spirit Day - full transcript

The team suits up to stop Mega FAT CEO Baby from winning an office spirit day contest that's totally rigged. Because nobody likes a bully.

Are you wondering how healthy the food you are eating is? Check it -

Hold all my calls.


♪ Boss Baby ♪

♪ I'm the boss, Boss Baby
Boss boss, Boss Baby, boss boss ♪

♪ Watch a itty-bitty kid get large
I'm the big Boss Baby in charge ♪

♪ Stroller rolling
Up and down the boulevard ♪

♪ I'm the big Boss Baby in charge ♪

♪ I run this house, I rule this crib
Change my diaper, son, where's my bib? ♪

♪ Don't pacify, you just got to pay me ♪

-♪ Who's in charge? ♪
-♪ Me, the Boss Baby ♪

-[steam hisses]

[sighs] This is the life.

[sniffs] You smell that?

I smell overcooked bratwurst
and communal sweating.

I know! Isn't it awesome?
I love the annual block party.

It's like an entire summer packed
into one afternoon.

I'm enjoying the fun
and respecting the efficiency.

I'm surprised you're cool
missing this much work.

Uh, nothing important at the office today.

Nothing at all. We shouldn't be talking.
Why are we talking about this?

[imitating electric guitar]

-Did the breeze just get funkier?
-Oh, yeah.

Wait for it-- de-boosh-- wang!


This groove machine has only one volume:

[shrieks] ♪ Flaming hot! ♪

[imitates sizzle] Ooh!

Ready to see your dad shred the bass
at the block party talent show?

You can shred
more than incriminating documents?

-[inhales sharply] Hmm. I'm intrigued.
-You know it, Dad.

Timbo, I hear the Kapurs' house

has a Slide-N-Splash
with your name on it.

-Wanna check it out?
-Yes, I do!

-Can I bring the baby?
-Be back by "talent show o'clock."

Don't wanna perform
without my number-one audience.

Six p.m. sharp.
Your father's been in the basement

practicing his little fingers off
all week.

Yeah. Inflamed finger blisters.
I think the pinky's infected.

Oh, wow.
We really should've medicated that.

It's rock 'n' roll, honey.
Can't give up when the going gets tough.

That's what my Learn How To Play
the Bass Guitar video told me.

Okay, so, we'll see you at six.
Save me a hot dog!

Make sure the baby has a swim diaper!

I can't find your swim diapers.
This itchy sack okay?

-[monitor chimes, buzzes]
-Strategy session.

After the Slide-N-Splash,
I say we hit up the bouncy castle,

-Are you gonna answer that?

Uh, no. Told you,
no important business today.

-It's nothing.
-[rings, buzzes]

It says "All hands company announcement."

-Empty buzz words.
-It says "Urgent."

Typo. Ignore it.

[laughs] You never ignore work.
That's a joke, right?

-Okay, I'll answer it.
-No, don't! [groans]

Please hold for an important announcement.

What's up, underlings?

Time once more for my favorite day
of the whole year,

besides my birthday party
you're not invited to.

It's a tasteful private ceremony.

Can anyone guess what day it is?
[imitates buzz sound]

I can. It's Baby Corp Office Spirit Day!

[balloon squeaks]

I can hold for applause
as long as it takes.



Anywhatevers, I'm sure
you're on pins and needles

to know what our Spirit Day game will be.

Nobody cares what the game is,
you smirking jackanapes.

-You're gonna cheat anyway.
-He cheats?!

How are you shocked?
It's Mega Fat CEO Baby.

He thinks the "C" in CEO
stands for cheating.

And nobody calls him on it?

This year's game is oh, what?

[gasps] Capture the Flag,
but with a twist.

The flag is the prize,
and it's also not a flag.

It's a brand-new, tippy-top of the line,

executive baby walker.

Four sippy cup holders,
expandable desktop,

three-speed massage chair. [laughs]


[gurgling, laughs]

I've had my eye on this sassy,
classy chassis a long time.

Imagine toddling around the office,
all shiny and chrome.

Wait, Mega Fat CEO Baby
makes a contest only he can win

to get a prize only he wants?

That's... that's...


-Extra-double unfair!

Magnus, hide the walker, if you please.

And now, show of hands.

Who wants to have a go
at this beautiful prize?

First to find and retrieve it
is our Spirit Day winner!

Come on. Let's Slide-N-Splash.

-No way! We have to stop him.
-Gotta pick your battles, kid.

Is it worth challenging the CEO
in a rigged game

to win a prize I don't even want, and--
What are you doing?

Always stretch before a big game.

Were you listening? I'm not playing.

Someone has to teach
Mega Fat CEO Baby a lesson.

Can't that be you and me?

For starters, that's two someones,
and we literally have better things to do.

So we skip the Slide-N-Splash.
I bet we can win that Spirit game

and get back in time for the bouncy
castle, hot dogs and Dad's show.

And I'd get to knock Mega Fat CEO Baby
down a peg or two.

Hmm, not a bad trade-off...
for me at least.

-What's in it for you?
-I don't like it when bullies win.

Get the transport chupies.

-Let's go win a baby walker!

No volunteers?

Nobody? No? You? No? What?

Oh, well. I guess that fancy,
fancy new walker is going to go to--

-[Boss Baby] I volunteer.
-[all gasp]

[worker] I can't believe it.

[voices overlapping]

[stutters] You what?

Oh, strictly in the interest
of company spirit, sir.

Wouldn't be much fun
if you played by yourself.

[gasping, murmuring]

[baby girl] Right on!

You're right, Boss Baby.

I'd love a little friendly competition.

-Just you and me.
-And me.

Yeah, here's the problem, man-baby.
You don't work here.

But know what? I'm feeling generous.

If Boss Baby wants to compete
and drag his sidekick the whole way,

who am I to stop him? Very well.
Mano-a-mano and mano's man-baby.


-Count me in! I got your back, boss.
-I wanna play too.

-Let's do this!
-Potty first.

Okay, I'm ready!

[babies cheering]

Oh, I have company spirit coursing
through my veins, and I love it.


-Sorry I'm late, but I'm in!


[worker] I wanna play, I wanna play!

[worker] It's gonna be fun!

Okay, hooray! The more the merrier.
Whatever. One, two, three, go!

Go, go, go! Go!

-[Tim] Go, go, go!
-I wanna play!

Magnus, as our completely
unbiased referee,

I'm sure you hid the baby walker
in a neutral location.

I hid it in your office.

I assumed your talk of neutrality
was strictly sarcastic.

Magnus, you truly get me.


-[worker] Where's the walker?

[worker] Has anybody seen a walker?

Oh, me, oh, my.
I had no idea I'd get here fi--

What the...? What?

This is the what.

Oh! Really feeling the Spirit Day spirit
in this beauty.

How did you possibly beat me here?

I only stopped two times for snacks and--

Ah, I'm seeing the problem now.

We've gotta throw a victory party.
Cheater bullies not invited.

It's a "tasteful" private ceremony.



[both laughing]

Whoo! Easier than I thought,
but totally worth it.

Did you see the look on his face?
He was all, "What?"

We won with plenty of time left
for block partying and bass guitar.

Win-win-win? Three wins.

-[speaker squeals]
-[both groan]

[CEO Baby over PA]
Bravo, brava, bravissimo, Boss Baby.

You and your impish sidekick
have won Spirit Day... round one.

-Round one?
-[CEO Baby] Round one.

You may have found the prize walker,
but now you've got to keep it.

-Welcome to surprise round two!

He can't do that!
That's a whole new round.

All you've got to do is get your prize
back through Baby Corp

to the safe zone on the main floor.
The napping cubicle. Neutral territory.

Whoever gets it there wins...
for permanent realsies this time.

[groans] We can't let this cheater win.

So, okay, maybe no Slide-N-Splash
or bouncy castle.

Pick your battles, Templeton.

We still get hot dogs, and we'll be back
in plenty of time for Dad's show.

Your call.

Let's roll.

[elevator pings]

Hey, looking good, Double B.
You were born for a walker like that.

Thanks, Hendershot.
Come by and give it a spin later.

Will do. [laughs]

Can't believe you took on the CEO himself.

-[speaker squeals]
-[CEO Baby] Ahem.

Just a few more announcements
for a few very special employees.

Manager Baby Hendershot,
just wanted to give you a heads-up

that I know about that oh-so-embarrassing
science experiment video you made.

If you don't want anyone else to see it,
I'll need a teensy-weensy favor.

Stop Boss Baby
from reaching the napping cubicle.



Hendershot, how long
have we known each other?

Sorry, Beebs.

Run, Templeton!

Hmm. Let's see. [gasps] Wha...?

Worker Baby Amal writes love poems
about his own diaper?

Should I publish them
in the company newsletter?

Maybe, if he doesn't help
get that baby walker back.

I'm sorry. I'm so sorry!

Oh, triplets!

One of you called the other two
a super-duper bad name.

-[all gasp]

-Let's say the green froggy one.
-[both] How dare you!

I was framed!

Stop Boss Baby and I'll tell you
which naughty word he used.

And to all the babies
who've been stealing office supplies,

well, let's say you know who you are,
and more importantly, so do I.

I stealed a whole copy machine!
[gasps] Who told?

Now, the finer points
of your oh-so-dirty laundry

can stay our little secret...

if you stop Boss Baby
from reaching the safe zone.

Show no mercy.

-[all growling]

[CEO Baby] Happy Spirit Day.
Juice and cookies after work!

Hey! Get back here!

[all yelling]

Come on!

-[Tim whimpers]
-Hold them off, Templeton!


I'm not... [grunts]

-...comfortable shoving babies!
-[babies yelling]

This was your idea.
Wanna win, you gotta shove--

-Water balloons!
-Huh? [yells]

Oh, great.
Accounting had a birthday this week.

-Don't worry, I've got this! Ugh!

Keep going! I'll catch up.


Ah! I can't shove that many babies!
Agh! [grunts]

The cavalry has arrived!

Hose 'em down.



Staci, when this is all over,
remind me to promote you to something.


-[gasps] Other triplets!
-Oh, soil my diaper.

Down with the traitor!

And all who ally with his traitorousness!

Brothers, no!


-Hit the brakes!


[Jimbo wincing] Ouch!


-[Boss Baby] Oh!
-[both grunt]


[grunts] You okay?

[groans] My owies have boo-boos.

-Brothers together.
-To the death.

Wait. When did that become
a possibility?


-[both coughing]
-[Amal] Baby powder smoke bomb!

[metal clanging]

[triplet 2] I'm blind...

But my rash feels great!

Where'd they go?

[Tim] What happened? Did we die?
Is this baby heaven?

Baby heaven's dark and spooky.

-[gasps] Tell me we're not in baby he--
-It's an air vent.

We're very much alive. Relax.

-[both gasp]


-What are you doing down here?

-I gave you a job topside.
-Oh, you did.

But when I saw you were being chased
by that frightful mob,

I used my old vents to save you.

After all, you saved me from a mob once.

We should hang out sometime
without mobs.

-What time is it?
-Think we're missing hot dogs?

-We might even miss Dad's show.
-No way. We'll get there.

But if we leave, Mega Fat CEO Baby
gets everything he wanted.

All of this would be for nothing.

I told you, you can't fight every battle.
Sometimes the cheating bullies win.

-You accept it and move on.
-I don't accept that.

Cheaters and bullies do not win.

Remember what Dad said
about rock 'n' roll and not giving up?

Technically, the bass guitar
instructional video said that.

Did he get blisters? Yes.

Are his fingers infected
and super gross? They are.

But did he give up learning his song?

I just wanna say I have no idea
what's going on,

but it's been great
to be part of this moment.

[crowd cheering]
Go, Ted! Go, Ted! Go, Ted!

Go, Ted! Go, Ted! Go, Ted!

Whoo! That's my man!

-[man 1] Way to go, Ted!
-[man 2] Yeah!

-We love you, man!

Uh, I'm gonna need five more minutes.

-[man 3] Oh, man!
-[crowd groans]

What do you mean, disappeared?
Whose fault is this?

Come, come. Show of hands
so I can smack them, you naughty babies.

Where is my fancy prize walker?!

Guys, I need it for winning!


Vroom-vroom, Mega Fat CEO Baby.

Block the napping cubicle finish line!
If Boss Baby tries to cross it...

you make him pay with ouchies.

No! I can't do it. Boss Baby's my friend.

How touching.
And now, I'm touching this button

that spills your darkest secrets.

This will be my seventh attempt.
The world must know what it's like.

Oh, no!

-[crowd gasping]

-[worker] Ew!
-[crowd gasping]

He's gonna eat it.

[workers gasping, shouting]

-[worker baby] Ew!
-Oh! There it goes.

It was delicious!


Anyone else want their secrets spilled?
Amal's diaper love poems, perhaps?

Ahem. "You wrap me up like a blanket.
But, like, with more stank-et."

Stop! I'll do anything!

-Yeah, me too!
-Me too.

Me too.

And I'll take back
that prize walker myself.

[man 1] Ted, you're my idol!

-[man 2] Go, Ted!
-[man 3] Ted rules!

This is for my boys... wherever they are.


[bass music continues]


Why are we all standing dramatically?
Somebody give me pushes!

-All aboard!
-Let's ride.

Almost got him. Faster!

Sir, we'd go faster
if you'd use your feet.

You're doing fine. Now board them!



[CEO Baby] Cut them off!

-Get the walker!
-They're pulling ahead!

Steer for me. This machine
needs $700 Italian loafer power.

[Boss Baby panting]

Jimbo, help him!

Activate turbo feet!

Run, run, run, run, run,
run, run, run!

[wheels screeching]

Triplets, stop your disloyal brother!

I'll handle them.

-Wait. No!
-Let him go. It's a family matter.

-We don't have to fight.
-You called us a bad name!

-Yeah, you ding-dong!
-Now you called me a bad name!

What a chowderhead.

-Oh, great. Now we're all angry!

-We should wrestle!

[Triplet 1] I love you guys.

[all giggling]


[CEO Baby]
Brotherly love disgusts me. Bye!


[CEO Baby yelps]


Ah, simple little man-baby.

How does it feel
knowing you're slowing Boss Baby down?

You'll never fit in. Your shirt's boring.
I don't like your laugh.

-Is this making you want to quit?
-No, because cheating bullies never win.


Jimbo, don't you want more
than a job pushing some baby walker?

-Join me, Jimbo.

-I don't wanna!
-[doll squeaks]

-Can I tempt you with a soft bear toy?
-A little, but not enough!

Give it up, Mega Fat. Jimbo's loyal.

Ah, but are you loyal?
I know how ambitious you are.

You could be more
than field team scary tough girl.

Boss Baby isn't your superior.
He's just another obstacle.

Join me, Staci.
The apprentice always overthrows the boss.

-It's your corporate destiny.


[Boss Baby] Hang on!

[CEO Baby shouting]



[CEO Baby] Ugh!

[all groaning]

-I am not betraying my team!
-Glad to hear it.

Not until I'm good and ready. [giggles]

Uh, maybe I should drive now.
Napping cubicle.

[workers growl]

Let's put this game to bed.

End of the road, Boss Baby!

Ha-ha. Care to surrender now
and save yourself a lot of pain?

-Please say no.
-We're never gonna get through them.

Stay here. Tim and I have to finish this.

Nothing personal.
Mostly a weight thing. You'll see.

-Ready, Templeton?
-Let's ride.

-Go, boys!
-I believe!

[worker] You can do it, Boss Baby!

I believe in you!

[worker 2] Go!


[worker] Do it for all of us!



-Take aim!
-[all snarling] Yeah!

Happy Spirit Day, Boss Baby.


Now, Frankie!

-Hang on!
-[Tim] Whoa!

We did it. We're flying!

[Baby Boss]
Napping cubicle, here we come!

-Oh, right. Gravity.
-[both screaming]

[all gasping]




[man 1] Yeah!

[crowd cheering]


[workers cheering] Yeah! Yeah!



...prized baby walker is yours. [groans]

[workers cheering, shouting]

Thank you, sir.
You played a good game yourself.

But cheated.

[Jimbo beatboxing]

[laughing] Yeah!

Way to go, boss!


Wow, I, um...

Oh, I don't know what to, uh...

[faint crash]



You're the only one who wanted the walker.
That's my prize.


And the look on your face? His prize.

Timothy Templeton.

-Oh, my gosh, Dad. We missed it?
-Your father was counting on you.

For the record,
it was a heck of a show.

But there was a thing and--
oh, I should've picked my battles.

-But I thought I could--
-No excuses, young man.

You're grounded all week.

Hope whatever fun you were having
was worth it.

Upstairs, and give me the baby.

You must be exhausted.

Come on, march.

Hey, uh, Dad.

I'm really sorry the baby and I
missed your show.

I know I'm grounded,
but I was thinking,

if you played really loud, the baby and I
could hear it from our rooms.

You know,
if you felt like putting on another show.

[brief buzz]

-[bass note plays]
-[Tim gasps]


[Boss Baby giggling]

-[music continues]
-[Tim] Whoo-hoo! Yeah, Dad!

-[Boss Baby squeals]
-[Tim] Rock and roll! [chuckling]

[theme song playing]

♪ Boss Baby ♪