The Batman (2004–2008): Season 4, Episode 11 - Rumors - full transcript

I do love spending afternoons
at the old fishing hole.

Let's see what we hooked, boys.
Here we go.

Huh?

Hiding in the shadows? Ha.

Since when do I need
to see you to find you, Batman?

You're not Bats.

Huh?

Ah!

Ah!

Whoever you are, you are meat.

What the...? What is this?



This?

This is the end.

For all of you.

Killer Croc is the latest of the so-called
Rogues Gallery Criminals to disappear.

And witnesses are calling it the work of
a new vigilante patrolling our city streets.

Now questions are being raised...

as to whether there is room in Gotham
for two costumed crime fighters.

The only hero Gotham needs
is this new guy.

With the Batman, those crackpots
never stayed locked up for long.

I'd say it's time the Bat hang up
his cape and call it a night.

Let a new hero actually get the job done.

It's not like it's your fault
they keep escaping from Arkham.

Time for work.

Ragdoll, Moth, Firefly.
They were all here.



And all taken down
by our mystery vigilante.

This new hero's not leaving much work
for us, huh?

He's no hero.

If he were, he'd hand these criminals
over to the police.

Instead, he's collecting them.
The question is, why?

Break-in at the art museum.

Hmm, I know the perfect place for you.

Try, "Back where you found it."

Batman, my favorite stalker.
Ooh, and another new kid partner.

Is that because
they make you look taller?

Sorry, allergic to cats. And bad jokes.

Now, handsome,
how did you know to find me here?

I thought I was being careful.

Nothing screams "careful"
like a brick through the window.

Someone else tripped the alarm.
And on purpose.

I see you got my message.
Took you long enough to get here.

- Penguin.
- Ah!

Uh! Huh?

Wait. Let's find out what he wants.

What I want is to turn myself in.

Come on, chop-chop.
Let's go, pat me down.

Have to catch me in the act, is that it?

Okay, uh, look.

I'm stealing.

What? Not enough?

Then you should know...

that soon, all of Gotham will suffer
some cruel, ironic, bird-related fate...

at the hands of El Penguino.

What's a felon gotta pull
to get arrested around here?

Uh, you're embarrassing yourself.

Listen, I'm begging you.
I need your protection from that new guy.

He's not like you, Batman. He's scary.

There's no new guy. That's a rumor.

Huh? What?

What?

The thing about rumors,
they're often true.

You get one chance, Batman.
Step away from the lowlife scum.

All right then.

- Excuse me.
- Ah!

Oh, I don't like that kid.

Uh! Ow, That hurt.

No point in us sticking around.
Coming, toots?

Sorry, Bats.
The suit absorbs my body heat.

There you are.

Ah!

Oh, no! Ah!

Rumor's good.
He keeps disappearing without a trace.

Not this time.

Rumor's using light-refracting
nanofibers to become invisible.

The only company in Gotham developing
that kind of tech is Karon Industries.

As in "Paul Karon."

Our captor continues to captivate me.

I wonder what it is that motivates him.

And if there is some ultimate punishment
he has awaiting us.

Punishment?

You mean something worse
than being stuck here listening to you?

I have bad news and I have worse news.

The bad news is,
I've sentenced all of you to life.

The worse news is,
It's going to be a very short sentence.

However, before I can carry it out,
I still have one very special piece to add.

- Ready, Mr. Karon?
- Two minutes, Mario.

I'm here if you need me.

Paul Karon.

Why, if it isn't the people's hero.

Oh, wait. Heard a rumor someone
more qualified has that job now.

This new vigilante...

he's been using technology developed
by you to abduct criminals from Gotham.

Well, if you find him,
tell him I wanna shake his hand.

Any idea how he got your stuff?

Maybe it fell off a truck.
Maybe it isn't my stuff.

And maybe I just don't care.

Oh.

You haven't told him where
we've met before, have you, Batman?

Not long ago, I developed a tool that
could emit low frequency sound waves...

so powerful
they could destroy a building.

The government was very interested.

But so was Joker.

Of course, the Batman
would heroically arrive.

Batman saved the day.

But not me.

These villains weren't in Gotham
before Batman took to the streets.

He's attracted them like moths to light.
And now he can barely contain them.

Gotham's better off
because of the Batman.

I certainly am not.

Now, if you're done interrogating the
victim, why don't you get out of here?

Ready?

So where do we go now?

Who says we're done here?

And what are we looking for?

We'll know when we see it.

Oh. It's gonna be one of those nights.

Cool. What is this stuff?

"Exo Legs"?

Anything else you need, boss?

No, thank you, Mario.

Go home. Get some sleep.

Okay, but are you sure
you want me to leave you here?

I may not be a hundred percent, my friend,
but I can still handle myself in the lab.

Now, go. I'll see you in the morning.

Okay, boss. Good night.

A super-powered exoskeleton and
a company that makes secret stealth suits?

He's our guy.
We should have kicked his butt last night.

We don't know
where he's keeping his victims.

If we're going to find them,
we'll have to catch Paul Karon in the act.

Wouldn't everyone be better off
if we just let Karon finish the job?

The code we work by
isn't always the easiest way, Robin.

But it's the right way.

Love this show.
Physical comedy is truly an art.

World's Deadliest Disasters
will continue after these messages.

Now, I admit...

when Punch and Judy didn't check in
the other night, I started to worry.

It was only a matter of time
before this Rumor came a-courtin' me.

So I decided,
why sit around waiting?

Be proactive.

Oh, boys.

Let's show our new friend he's welcome
at Uncle Joker's Hospitality Hut.

Hmm?

Huh? Oh, man!

Huh?

Huh? Huh?

Joker was taken tonight.

Didn't think you had it in you.
Congratulations.

It wasn't us.

Anything you'd like to confess?

Do I really need an alibi?

We know about your exo-suit.

When I was hurt, I realized
the suit had non-military applications.

I've been testing it.
Looking for a way to help people like me.

Hardly a crime, Batman.

I heard voices.
Everything okay, Mr. Karon?

If you don't believe me, ask Theo.

He's been with me all day.

Where's your bodyguard
from the other night?

Mario?

It's his night off. Why?

Time's up, my friends.

Excuse me.

Before you send us all
to that big Arkham Asylum in the sky...

would you mind indulging
an old man's intellectual curiosity...

and answer a simple question?

Why?

Why? I'll tell you why.

I'm the bodyguard of Paul Karon.
A great man.

A man you, Joker, maimed.

- Me?
- Should have known this was Joker's fault.

Just had to make the nutball angry.

Don't blame Joker. Blame the Bat.

He had the chance to permanently stop
each and every one of you...

but was always prevented
by some code of ethics.

Now I'm left to finish a job
he doesn't have the guts to.

And you believe every word of that,
don't you?

You didn't capture us
so you could save Gotham. No.

You're trying to erase your own failure
of not saving your boss.

That's not true. Shut up!

Karon's sonic weapon.

Once it's warmed up...

it's gonna destroy every supervillain
in Gotham in one fell swoop.

You have nothing to prove, Mario.

Probably shouldn't use one of
your boss's old factories as a hideout.

He helped you find me?
But this was for him.

Even he felt you crossed a line.

Maybe it's a line
you should have crossed too, Batman.

Ah!

Mind if we cut in, Batsy?

You see, there's this nasty little Rumor
we'd all like to stomp out.

You have to save me.

I know.

Let me guess, this is one of those...

not-the-easy-way,
but-the-right-way moments.

Ah! Whoa!

This counts as overtime, right?

Whoops! Ha-ha!

You know, I bet
there was an "off" button.

How can you do this?
They had to be stopped.

They're the criminals.

Them! Not me.

Not me!

Just wanted to say thanks, handsome.

And by the way...

I still find you scary.