The Batman (2004–2008): Season 3, Episode 1 - Batgirl Begins: Part 1 - full transcript

You're getting to be
a real thorn in my side, Batman.

And you're no rose, Poison Ivy.

Why fight, Batman,

when we can kiss and make up?

Awww.

Who'll save you now,
Jimbo?

Yep, it's official.

I hate vegetables.

Batgirl.

For the last time, Ivy,

it's woman, Batwoman.



And Commissioner Gordon
won't be staying for dinner.

Devour her.

Whoa.

Okay, Batman, awaiting your
expert guidance here.

Seriously,

help?

Go ahead, Batman.

Give your little lady friend
a hand.

As you command.

Hey.

Guess you were serious
about not wanting a sidekick.

Hey.

Um, hiya.

You've probably
been wondering



what I'm doing here.

Fair enough.

Yesterday, I was just
your average teen

who was trying to find herself.

Today I've got some
majorly peeved petunias

nipping at my cape.

But enough about my new
wardrobe,

let me take you back
to the beginning.

Now, if you think
this all started

with a bad girl
named Poison Ivy,

you'd be wrong.

The situation came down
the night before

at a plant.

Um, as in industrial,

not vegetable.

And it started with a bad guy.

Target sighted.

- Proceed with your mission,
- Temblor.

Hello? Is this thing on?

Yes, yes, the fine print.

Payment in full and in advance.

Let's rumble.

Freeze.

Officers need back up.

Repeat, back up.
It's on its way.

Hoo-ya!

Howdy, I'm Temblor.

Let's shake.

Temblor, I'm waiting.

Have you completed
your mission?

Set up a perimeter.

If Mr. Quake so much as
breathes,

I want someone there to tell me
what he had for lunch.

It's okay to show yourself,

you're not on our most wanted
list anymore.

Force of habit.

Third building Temblor
has taken out this week

and we still can't
nail a pattern.

I'll nail a motive.
He's work for hire.

I managed to borrow this
from Temblor.

Gordon.

Uh, not a good time.
What is it, Barbara?

It's your lucky night,
Pop.

No need to pick me up
from gymnastics.

You skipped practice.
Again.

You sound stressed.
I should let you go.

You're letting years of
training slip down the drain.

I hope you're not out
with Pamela Isley again.

I don't give you a hard time
about the company you keep.

We'll talk when I get home.

You're with him right now,
aren't you?

No. Yes, I...

Uh, we're discussing a case.

Roger that, commish,
over and out.

My daughter.
Teenagers, huh?

Ready, Red?

Let's do it, Red.

This is a stickup.

Psych.

Quite a mess, huh?

Well, not compared
to the amount of pollution

your company Chlorogene

dumps into our environment.

And don't even get me started
on your whole

Chloromulch-brand mutated
super vegetables.

We'll save you.

Security!

Good job, Red.

Hey.

You're a superstar, Red.

Years of training.

Beats hanging out
at the mall, huh?

Uh-oh.

Busted.

You two need a ride?

Barb, I'm concerned
you're on your way

to blowing your shot
at the Olympics.

What could have been more
important than practice tonight?

Red and I were just out

trying to make the world
a better place.

You know, for plants.

I'm all for green, Pamela.
Really I am.

But I know from your
juvenile hall record

that your methods can be
a little extreme.

Now, sorry to cut
the evening short,

but it's past my daughter's
curfew.

Thanks for the ride, commish.

Barb, Pam's a bad seed.

You've traced the messages
to their source already,

Master Bruce?

Bat-wave's intercepting
a live message, Alfred.

Temblor.

I have a new target for you.

I want you to destroy
the corporate headquarters

of Chlorogene.

Your target is the corporate
headquarters

of Chlorogene.

Its destruction
must be total.

Pammy, I need you to take out
the trash.

Who was that?
That was my henchman.

I said, take out the trash.

In a minute.

What about my pay?

In full and in advance as usual.

Wired straight
from my piggy bank.

Yep, this should cover it.

And here I thought earthquakes
struck without warning.

Buddy, you just dialed D

for destruction.

I thought I'd seen it all, Barb.

You wouldn't believe
the demolition

this Temblor character
is capable of.

But the Bat
has a lead.

I think he's really gonna
come through for us on this one.

So when you gonna invite
the Dark Knight over

for your killer pork chops
so I can meet him?

Beanbags R Us.
This is Gary.

Hey, Red, I'm not done
with Chlorogene

and their mutated
super plants.

What say you and me
go down to their research labs

and try some persuasion
on their scientists.

No can do,
a parental unit is near.

Gotta go.

The other Red?

Barb, she's trouble.

Pam's a good friend

and she gets
the environment thing.

That's important to me.

Last month,
Betsy was a good friend

and beekeeping
was important to you.

Look, Pop,
if you're so concerned

Pam is gonna steer me down
some criminal path,

just remember
I was pretty much set

on becoming a detective

until someone
decided to get me

a mustachioed Eastern European
gym coach

so I could go for the gold.

Barb, law enforcement
is dangerous work.

I don't want
that life for you.

Maybe if you'd seen the mess

Temblor made at Neugog Chemicals
tonight.

What? Neugog Chemicals?

Gordon. Batman and Temblor
at Chlorogene?

Just now?
I'll be right there.

Sorry, hon.
Duty calls.

Neugog Chemicals.

Chlorogene?

Companies Red and I went to
on protests.

Or scouting missions
for Temblor's demolitions.

Bat-wave traced the messages
to their source.

Pamela Isley.

I know that name.

I hope you're not out
with Pamela Isley again.

Barbara Gordon's friend.

I do hope
the commissioner's daughter

is not somehow involved
in this enterprise.

So do I.

Get out before we call
the police.

Had your chance.

Sir, Bat-wave is intercepting
another live message.

Put it through, Alfred.

I have a new target, Temblor:

Chlorogene research labs.

It's located...
Yeah, yeah.

It's just around the corner
from me.

But before we discuss that,

there seems to be
a little problem

with the money transfers.

I'm sorry, but didn't you
just blow the last job?

Listen, Temblor,

If you're interested
in getting paid at all,

you'd better get over here
right now.

I said "here." Stupid.

Temblor?

Is he a friend
from homeroom?

Uh, looks like you caught me
red-handed, Red.

Did one of your twigs snap,
Pam?

You hired a thug.

You'd be surprised what you can
find on the Internet.

Pam, it's not too late.

You have to stop this.

I don't wanna have to watch
my dad

read you your rights.

Pft! And here I thought
we were two peas in a pod.

Shoulda known I couldn't trust
the commish's kid.

I'll miss you, Red.

Well, well.

Let me see how this works.

Testing.

Testing.

You are not at all
how I pictured you...

boss.

See,
the way it works, boss,

is when you don't pay...

you pay.

Hey, we're good for it.

Uh, we'll, uh, raise the funds
with a bake sale.

You like brownies?

Later, Red.

You two have fun.

I'm warning you. I'm...
I'm an Olympic hopeful.

Mutant tomatoes, yum.

You've been terminated.

Hmmm.

Huh?

The Batman.

And he's...

He is awesome.

Red. Help, I can't move.

Oh, no, toxic sludge.

No. Hang on, Red.

That stuff mutates
plants.

I don't wanna see
what it does to humans.

Here comes
the big one.

No.

Did you, uh, invite him
for pork chops?

Will she be okay?

We'll know more
after the detox procedure.

Okay, I know.

You still wanna know
how we get from here

to here.

Well, believe it or not...

Hiyah!

this, my friends,

is only the beginning.