The Batman (2004–2008): Season 2, Episode 5 - Swamped - full transcript
Killer Croc, a half-man, half-reptile, plans to submerge all of Gotham under water to carry out his scheme of plundering the city.
All right, we lay low until the heat's off.
Then we move the rocks.
- Clear?
- Crystal.
Speaking of heat...
Oh, man. Is that the Bat?
Boys, I'm a whole different breed
of animal.
And one butt-ugly hood ornament.
Looks like you had a busy night.
That's good.
Because you're all working for me now.
Gentlemen, show the walking freak show
who's boss around here.
You city boys need to learn yourself
some manners.
- Who are you?
- Name's Croc.
Killer Croc. But you can call me boss.
Gotham has a sudden burst
of nine seemingly unrelated heists.
With stolen goods
ranging from explosives to Jet Skis.
There has to be a link
between these crimes.
Apologies, Master Bruce.
Just a bit of spring-cleaning.
Alfred, where are you taking
the evidence?
These cases are closed.
They are now history.
In every sense of the word.
It would be criminal
to not preserve these items for posterity.
So I've chosen to archive them.
A private museum, if you will.
After all, the Batman may someday enjoy
a more favorable place in society's view.
Yeah. I won't hold my breath.
Water.
Actually, I'd prefer a spot of iced tea,
if you're headed to the kitchen.
No, the link between the robberies.
Water.
A half dozen within spitting distance
of a canal and three on Gotham Bay.
Boss wants this swag loaded. Pronto!
The Batman.
I'd like to have a word with this boss
you fellas mentioned.
My daddy used to say,
“You want something done right...
...best to do it yourself.“
You look to be this Batman legend
I keep hearing about.
Well, folks are gonna start hearing
about how Killer Croc stopped you good.
Boss Croc definitely does not have
both oars in the water.
Yeah, he calls this
slime pit headquarters.
Well, maybe you two
should mention that to Croc.
Me, I like my teeth just where they are.
Yeah, well, first chance I get,
It's “After a while, crocodile.“
Sure do hate to see my boys so unhappy.
Oh, not me, boss.
I'm happy as a clam.
Good. Because this time tomorrow...
...the tops of skyscrapers
will be our lily pads...
...and downtown Gotham
will be our oyster.
Master Bruce, your Batsuit may be drip-dry,
you, however, are not.
Next time, I'll be sure
to keep Croc on my turf.
Dry land.
This was the scene moments ago...
...as Gotham's financial district was hit
by the largest flood in the city's history.
What?
Emergency crews are now arriving to assist
with the evacuation of local residents.
The cause of the flood is still unknown.
Three bank alarms in Gotham's
waterlogged financial district?
Your amphibious acquaintance?
Water, water, everywhere.
How about a little game of Chicken.
Cajun style.
Mind your cowl, now.
Croc's story, spill it.
He's ex-military, I think. Mercenary type.
Some think he's a genetic experiment,
a crossbreed soldier or something.
Others think he messed with the wrong
kind of voodoo in the bayou.
Me, I'm thinking circus freak.
Facts, not folktales.
What's to tell? Croc's new in town,
he's got big plans.
Bigger than robbing banks?
Croc said today's flood
was just a dry run.
If I wanted to do some big-city
Croc hunting, where would I go?
Oh, no way.
Boss Croc's cold-blooded, man.
I talk, I wind up fish food.
You don't talk,
we could all wind up fish food.
Schematics of Gotham's canals.
You sure got a lot of bloodhound in you...
...for a bat.
What do you think?
A dry little spot
to catch my breath between heists.
Right beside the overflow pumps
for Gotham's canal system.
They were designed to drain the canals
into the bay in case of flooding.
But I did some thinking.
If you reverse the pumps...
They draw water in from the bay,
filling the canals...
...until they submerge any part of Gotham
situated below sea level.
Just about all of downtown,
where the good shopping is.
Tens of thousands of lives could be lost.
And I'll shed a crocodile teal
for each and every one.
And speaking of...
...my pets haven't had a decent bite
since we arrived.
Now, if you'll pardon me, bat snack...
...I've got some more pumps to reverse.
Nothing like good old elbow grease.
You are peskier than a fly in a...
Catch of the day.
You gotta put your back into it, boy.
You best give it up, Bat. By the time
they figure out what caused the flood...
...downtown Gotham
will be my personal swamp.
Boy, you are beginning
to stick in my craw.
A dry little spot
to catch my breath between heists.
Your amphibious acquaintance?
Crocs may like water, but they're no fish.
So either of you up for giving lizard-lips
a little mouth-to-mouth?
Didn't think so.
What are you looking at?
This ain't over, aqua-bat.
Gotham is gonna be my backyard bayou.
I won't hold my breath.
You missed a spot.
And I just mopped that floor.
- What did you bring me?
- Evidence.
I shall archive this right away, sir.
Then we move the rocks.
- Clear?
- Crystal.
Speaking of heat...
Oh, man. Is that the Bat?
Boys, I'm a whole different breed
of animal.
And one butt-ugly hood ornament.
Looks like you had a busy night.
That's good.
Because you're all working for me now.
Gentlemen, show the walking freak show
who's boss around here.
You city boys need to learn yourself
some manners.
- Who are you?
- Name's Croc.
Killer Croc. But you can call me boss.
Gotham has a sudden burst
of nine seemingly unrelated heists.
With stolen goods
ranging from explosives to Jet Skis.
There has to be a link
between these crimes.
Apologies, Master Bruce.
Just a bit of spring-cleaning.
Alfred, where are you taking
the evidence?
These cases are closed.
They are now history.
In every sense of the word.
It would be criminal
to not preserve these items for posterity.
So I've chosen to archive them.
A private museum, if you will.
After all, the Batman may someday enjoy
a more favorable place in society's view.
Yeah. I won't hold my breath.
Water.
Actually, I'd prefer a spot of iced tea,
if you're headed to the kitchen.
No, the link between the robberies.
Water.
A half dozen within spitting distance
of a canal and three on Gotham Bay.
Boss wants this swag loaded. Pronto!
The Batman.
I'd like to have a word with this boss
you fellas mentioned.
My daddy used to say,
“You want something done right...
...best to do it yourself.“
You look to be this Batman legend
I keep hearing about.
Well, folks are gonna start hearing
about how Killer Croc stopped you good.
Boss Croc definitely does not have
both oars in the water.
Yeah, he calls this
slime pit headquarters.
Well, maybe you two
should mention that to Croc.
Me, I like my teeth just where they are.
Yeah, well, first chance I get,
It's “After a while, crocodile.“
Sure do hate to see my boys so unhappy.
Oh, not me, boss.
I'm happy as a clam.
Good. Because this time tomorrow...
...the tops of skyscrapers
will be our lily pads...
...and downtown Gotham
will be our oyster.
Master Bruce, your Batsuit may be drip-dry,
you, however, are not.
Next time, I'll be sure
to keep Croc on my turf.
Dry land.
This was the scene moments ago...
...as Gotham's financial district was hit
by the largest flood in the city's history.
What?
Emergency crews are now arriving to assist
with the evacuation of local residents.
The cause of the flood is still unknown.
Three bank alarms in Gotham's
waterlogged financial district?
Your amphibious acquaintance?
Water, water, everywhere.
How about a little game of Chicken.
Cajun style.
Mind your cowl, now.
Croc's story, spill it.
He's ex-military, I think. Mercenary type.
Some think he's a genetic experiment,
a crossbreed soldier or something.
Others think he messed with the wrong
kind of voodoo in the bayou.
Me, I'm thinking circus freak.
Facts, not folktales.
What's to tell? Croc's new in town,
he's got big plans.
Bigger than robbing banks?
Croc said today's flood
was just a dry run.
If I wanted to do some big-city
Croc hunting, where would I go?
Oh, no way.
Boss Croc's cold-blooded, man.
I talk, I wind up fish food.
You don't talk,
we could all wind up fish food.
Schematics of Gotham's canals.
You sure got a lot of bloodhound in you...
...for a bat.
What do you think?
A dry little spot
to catch my breath between heists.
Right beside the overflow pumps
for Gotham's canal system.
They were designed to drain the canals
into the bay in case of flooding.
But I did some thinking.
If you reverse the pumps...
They draw water in from the bay,
filling the canals...
...until they submerge any part of Gotham
situated below sea level.
Just about all of downtown,
where the good shopping is.
Tens of thousands of lives could be lost.
And I'll shed a crocodile teal
for each and every one.
And speaking of...
...my pets haven't had a decent bite
since we arrived.
Now, if you'll pardon me, bat snack...
...I've got some more pumps to reverse.
Nothing like good old elbow grease.
You are peskier than a fly in a...
Catch of the day.
You gotta put your back into it, boy.
You best give it up, Bat. By the time
they figure out what caused the flood...
...downtown Gotham
will be my personal swamp.
Boy, you are beginning
to stick in my craw.
A dry little spot
to catch my breath between heists.
Your amphibious acquaintance?
Crocs may like water, but they're no fish.
So either of you up for giving lizard-lips
a little mouth-to-mouth?
Didn't think so.
What are you looking at?
This ain't over, aqua-bat.
Gotham is gonna be my backyard bayou.
I won't hold my breath.
You missed a spot.
And I just mopped that floor.
- What did you bring me?
- Evidence.
I shall archive this right away, sir.