The A-Team (1983–1987): Season 1, Episode 12 - The Beast from the Belly of a Boeing - full transcript

Cal's holding me prisoner at the ranch,
but I finally managed to sneak out.

You want us to
rescue your friend?

Jackie and Cal are supposed to be
getting against Jackie's wishes.

Looks like we're
going to a wedding.

I now prounounce
you man and wife.

Aren't you gonna kiss the bride?

We're here to deliver
the weddin' cake.

I want them stopped!

- We outta juice.

- What happens now?
- We going down, boy.

Ten years ago, a crack commando unit was
sent to prison by a military court...



for a crime they didn't commit.

These men promptly escaped from a maximum-security
stockade to the Los Angeles underground.

Today, still wanted by the government,
they survive as soldiers of fortune.

If you have a problem, if no one else
can help, and if you can find them...

maybe you can hire...
the A-Team.

Democratic leaders at the L.B.J.
Ranch...

the legislature votes on
a new highway bill...

and millionaire entrepreneur
Calvin Cutter...

ties the knot this week with
Jaclyn Taylor, daughter of...

Hi, this is Tracy. I'm not able
to come to the phone right now...

but if you leave your name and number,
I'll get back to you as soon as possible.

- Remember to wait for the beep before you start talking.
- Come on! Beep already!

- Tracy, it's Jackie.
You've gotta help me.

I gotta get outta Texas. Cal's holding me prisoner
at the ranch, but I finally managed to sneak out.



I'm on my way to Dallas.
I'll call you.

No! No!

- L.A. Airport?
- Yeah.

Excuse me. How are you going to the airport?
You're supposed to take a right back there.

- I-I said, you're going the wrong way.
- Don't worry, lady. I know a short cut.

Hey, w-what're you doing?
Where're we going?

Wha... What are you doing?

Wh-Where're we...

Look, what do you want?
I don't have any money.

You better have somethin' if you wanna
hire the A-Team. Roll up your window.

Tracy, it's Jackie.
You've gotta help me.

I gotta get outta Texas. Cal's holding me prisoner
at the ranch, but I finally managed to sneak out.

I'm on my way to Dallas.
I'll call you.

No! No!

Mr. Lee told us your story
and played the tape for us.

You want us to rescue your friend
from a man named Calvin Cutter?

- He's Jackie's fiancé.
- Isn't he the guy who owns, like...

- three-fourths of Wilson County, Texas?
- Yes.

Jackie's father was his partner until he was
killed during a burglary at his office.

Jackie and Cal are supposed to
be getting married Saturday...

but obviously against
Jackie's wishes.

- Have you told the Dallas police about this?
- Well, that's the problem.

I reported it, and they called out there and supposedly
talked to Jackie, who said everything was fine.

Told them she was just pulling a
prank on an old sorority sister.

She does have a rep for
being a bit of a banana.

Jaclyn Taylor. Isn't that the girl that did
the nude bathing bit in the fountain in Rome?

Yeah. I know she's
in a lot of trouble.

Look, I wouldn't have gone through all this to
find you guys if I didn't really believe this.

Well, we'd like to help you, Tracy, but if
you're gonna hire us, we're very expensive.

Once you rescue Jackie,
money won't be an issue.

But for starters, I can get you
free passes through the airlines.

- That'll save you airfare to Dallas.
- No.

Um, thanks anyway. Try not to worry.
We'll try and help your friend.

Well, guys, looks like we're going to
a wedding. Here. Give this to Amy.

Now, you needed a cab
to go to the airport.

Here's a cab.

Well, wait a minute.
Where are you going?

Wait! Wait a minute. W-Wait.

Wait. You guys can't
leave me here.

Wait a minute.

- Yeah?
- We're here to deliver the weddin' cake.

Well, I already let a truck through
here with a cake. How many they havin'?

You say you let another truck pass? That was
the wrong cake. That was the pineapple.

- We are to be serving the lemon filling.
- Well, nobody said nothin' about it bein' the wrong cake.

Would you admit pineapple when
you should be having lemon?

Mmm! A masterpiece.

Okay, okay. Go on through.

- Murdock, what are you doing? That's shaving cream.
- So what? It's just a little soap.

Murdock, you're always
eating such weird stuff.

He's a weird dude.

- Doesn't it ever get to you?
- Of course not.

Look, bubbles.

But I just wanna
use the restroom.

Well, I'm sorry, but nobody is allowed in the house except
in the kitchen, and there ain't no restroom in the kitchen.

Now, if you want to use the one down here by
the pool, it's been set up for guests for you.

- Thank you.
- Mm-hmm.

- You look just like that guy at Lucy's in Saigon.
- Well, you look like Lucy.

- B.A., you and I'll get the cake.
- Be careful with that. It took me hours to bake it.

It's only cardboard, fool.
It's not a real cake.

Some people have no
appreciation for art.

Hi, there. Hannibal, this is not
gonna be real simple to pull off.

This ranch is set up like Fort Knox, and the
guests include the sheriff and the mayor.

- What about the inside?
- Beats me. Nobody can get in there.

- Well, they gotta let the caterers into the kitchen.
- Right.

B.A., you check out the kitchen. See if
we can get to the inside from there.

Amy, you shoot the layout of
the house from the outside.

Le chef, mingle around. Find out
which guests are carrying weapons.

And Face? You get
to find the bride.

You bet. And what are
you gonna be doing?

Oh, just tinkering around.

Excuse me. Where
did you come from?

- What kind of stupid question is that, fool? I brought the cake.
- But we already have a cake.

Well, you got another one.

I see. Well, take your cake...

and put it on the back
table behind my buffet.

And here.

Serve these drinks to the
guests on your way out.

- Hey!
- Hi!

What do you think you're doing back here?
This area's off-limits to guests.

Oh. Oh, I'm terribly sorry.

Nuptial photos. I was just trying to
get a feel for the place, you know?

So that I can choose the best
backgrounds for the portraits later.

Yeah, well, no one's allowed in the house right
now. We don't want to disturb the bride.

No problem. Could I just have
a picture of you, please?

Smile!

- Hi. How ya doin'? These are for Miss Taylor. Beautiful, aren't they?
- Huh!

- They're from her best friend, Tracy.
- Uh, nobody's allowed upstairs.

- I will see that she gets them.
- Right.

Thank you.

Thanks. How's the
catering service?

We can forget about the kitchen, man. It's
guarded. Ain't no way we're gettin' in back there.

Well, we're not getting
in from the front either.

The goons in the
tuxedos are armed.

Here, lady. Tie on a few.

- Well, are you nervous, old boy?
- Now, why in the heck should I be nervous...

when I'm marryin' someone who means
more to me than anything ever has?

That Jackie definitely
is one fine woman.

If only her father could have been here
today to share this day with us...

and see how happy
his little girl is.

Got some flowers for
you from Tracy.

Hey, uh, shouldn't you
oughta be gettin' dressed?

I mean, that wedding's
about to start down there.

Buzz off, clown. I'll get dressed
when I'm good and ready.

She's in one of these
rooms upstairs.

This trellis should
hold you and Murdock.

Murdock does not climb trellises.
Murdock is a designer of pastry.

Murdock, are you catching cold?

No. He's coughing because he ate the
shaving cream off the phoney wedding cake.

The man is a nut.

That's our cue.

Get her... now.

Hey! Finish that and
get on outta here!

Are you the guys who
wrote this note?

- That's right. Tracy hired us to come and get you.
- Ohh!

- Let's go, Jackie. They're
startin' to play the music.

Where is she? Everybody's seated.
We're ready to go.

Eh, she's just takin'
her good ol' time.

Are you sure she's in there?
She ran off once.

Well, it's about time.

Dearly beloved, we are gathered
here to join this man...

and this woman in
holy matrimony.

This is the wildest thing I've ever done.
You guys are crazy!

Speaking of Murdock,
where is he?

Do you, Jaclyn Leigh Taylor, take this man,
Calvin Cutter, to be your lawful wedded husband?

Well, I didn't go through all this
to see how I looked in white!

Thanks for coming.
I love your dress.

Now, B.A.!

Down, suckers!

Come to me, my precious!

You stop her at the front gate.
Come on with me.

I'm a bird, I'm a plane, I'm
a choo-choo train! Wow!

Touchdown!

Waahh!

Can't you hear a woman in distress?
Aah!

Tell Sheriff Gillis to set up
a roadblock on Highway 10!

I don't care how he does it.
I want them stopped!

I wonder why these have to be white? It's such an
impractical colour. Look how dirty it is already.

It's okay, Murdock. I doubt
you'll need to wear it again.

- You guys are something else!
- Sometimes.

Gee, I thought the
wedding was beautiful.

Tyres exploding everywhere, a cake that shoots back.
The whole thing right out of Bridal magazine.

The only thing I didn't
understand is...

why marry a guy who
locks you in your room?

At first, Cal was
caring and gracious.

But little by little, I began to
suspect his motives in dating me.

And then my father died, and I inherited
most of his financial empire...

which is what Cal was really
after right from the top.

Then I began to suspect that
he might've killed my father.

Oh, and to think I almost
married into that family.

Couple of months ago, Calvin
started getting mean.

The charm was gone.
All the little jokes.

It was like, in one second
he became another man.

- Sounds like a sociopath.
- A what?

A sociopathic personality is simply
a person who feels no emotion...

no love, no pain, nothin'.

Course, they learn to fake
these things very well.

But they could kill
without regard...

and then pass a lie detector
test with impunity.

You see, aside from being the
A-Team's perennial bride...

I also handle the, uh,
psychological profiles.

But I shan't, uh... I shan't bore
you with my credentials, my dear.

Man, you ain't got
no credentials.

Only ones you got is the fact you been
committed to the nuthouse for 10 years.

I can't believe a man can kill his
partner and get away so easily.

Well, my father had this one idiosyncrasy:
He tape-recorded his meetings.

He had a tape hidden
under his desk.

So if he taped every meeting, he
could have recorded his own murder.

But I've had no way of
getting at the tape.

As soon as my father died,
Calvin took over his office...

so I've no way of getting
in there to find the tape.

I don't think Calvin knew he had it, so I
don't think he thought to look for it.

Well, getting into places happens
to be one of our specialities.

Hey, y'all. Get
ready for a detour.

Yeah, uh, let's go around, B.A. Go slow.
They're looking for a catering truck.

You can be sure every dirt road
out of this county is blocked.

May I ask you a question? In all your
father's holdings, which you now control...

are there any
communication companies?

We have a little newspaper in Austin, and we
own a radio and TV station here in town...

and a few publishing
interests out of state.

A TV station. How nice.

Well, this is the truck, all right. Ya know, if they're on
foot, we ain't gonna have too much trouble findin' 'em.

They're not on foot. Lookee here.
Tire tracks.

- They're not the tire tracks from that truck either.
- Hell, they switched vehicles!

Let's go!

- You gotta help me, Pete.
- Jackie!

I need a spot, Pete... station I.D.
break, anything.

Just give me 30 seconds;
15, if that's all you got.

- What's goin' on here? I got a
report that you were kidnapped.

I loaned our helicopter to the sheriff
to look for the... the kidnappers.

I wasn't kidnapped, Pete, but
I have been held hostage...

and my life has been
threatened by Calvin.

Now, I wanna punch in and interrupt our broadcast
with an editorial comment on my fiancé.

Oh, no. Now, wait just a minute now.
We can't...

You hard of hearin', sucker?

Uh, j-just a minute.

He seem a little edgy to you?

She's down here with a bunch of
real mangy-lookin' characters...

ready to malign you
on public television.

All right, Pete, all right.
Now, you just keep her there.

Bo, she's at the
television station.

So, uh, you doing
anything Saturday night?

Uh-oh. Somebody sold us out.

Now, we gotta get a tape camera
and a recorder. Let's go.

Too bad the chopper from the TV station's not here.
We could've used that to get out of the county.

Murdock, grab that camera.

- Right.
- Eh, what are you gonna do, Hannibal? Shoot home movies?

I've got a plan.

Cutter got this place staked out
like nothin' I've never seen before.

Yeah, it looks like he's got just about
everyone bought or workin' for him.

You got any other great
plans, Hannibal?

Ah, no. That's a horrible plan, Hannibal.
Let me make this real clear.

- I hate this plan.
- Ah, it's just a simple ceremony.

No, no. But it's my ceremony,
and I don't wanna marry her.

Look, buddy, I don't appreciate your
attitude. I'm not exactly a toad.

Look, lady, it don't have
anything to do with you.

Marriage. There has
to be a better way.

I've explained it to you before. If we get Jackie
in a marriage contract, Calvin can't touch her.

- If he kills her, you get the money.
- But what if he kills me?

Well, then the orphanage in
your will gets the money.

See, he gets nothing.
It'll freeze him.

I mean, we need an insurance
policy, and you're it.

Actually, it's brilliant.

- Can I be maid of honour?
- I wanted that.

Get in there, fool.
You're crazy.

Do you, Jaclyn Leigh Taylor...

take Templeton Peck to be
your lawful wedded husband?

I do.

And do you, Templeton Peck...

take Jaclyn to be your
lawfully wedded wife?

Answer the guy.

Uh, yeah, yeah. I do.

The ring, please.

Ah. Uh...

B.A., would you mind?

Uh, do you have a
little smaller?

By the powers vested in me, I
now pronounce you man and wife.

Aren't you gonna kiss the bride?

Okay, Bobby. Send a couple of units up toward the
junction, then go check out Four Corners yourself.

Well? What have you got?

I'm sorry, Calvin. Nothing since they
slipped out of the TV station yesterday.

Well, how in the heck
did they get away?

I want them, Gillis, you hear?
I want their butts bad.

Now, we're bound to find
'em sooner or later.

- I know how much Jackie means to you.
- You find 'em. You find 'em and bring 'em to me.

They better not have gotten out of the county.
He's gonna have us ground up for sausage.

Nah, no way. They just must have
found a place to hole up last night.

Rise and shine, ladies. Checkout time
at the Hannibal Hilton is 10:00 a. m.

I can't handle this
another night, Hannibal.

If we get stuck in this county till tomorrow, I'm
taking my chances and checking into a motel.

- We're not stayin' another night.
- Wanna bet?

I knew I hit somethin' last night
when I turned off the road.

Up and at 'em, Lieutenant.
How was your bridal night?

- Got a busted brake line.
- Yeah? What's it look like?

Like a busted brake line, man.

- Good morning, honey.
- Can you fix it, B.A.?

- Gonna try. Thanks, Hannibal.
- Ah, ah.

- I need those.
- What you need my tools for?

To get my hands on the tape that'll
prove Calvin Cutter's a murderer.

I'm not gonna leave the county without
proof. I want to nail this guy.

The tape recorder's somewhere in the desk. I know that for
sure. I just don't know if Daddy had it goin' that night.

- We'll find out.
- The tape ain't gonna do us any good if we can't get outta the county with it.

Looks like I don't
have no wheels.

♪ Good morning muchachos ♪

All was quiet last night, but I wanna tell ya, that
turn-off we took is real visible in the daylight.

We gotta keep posting
a 24-hour guard.

We don't want a police car finding
us when we're not lookin'.

I'll get back as soon as I can.

Can you bring some food?
Oh, I'm starved.

Yeah. I'll, uh... I'll
get the next watch.

- Uh, Murdock?
- Hmm?

- Can I borrow your hat?
- Sure, Colonel. Would you mind delivering this for me?

- What is it?
- It's that stupid letter he was writin' last night, Hannibal. The man is nuts.

He's writin' Cutter a letter, tellin' him how sorry
and bad he feel for leavin' a man at the altar.

He was lucky to have had you,
a short a time as he did.

Oh, man!

Thank you, Colonel. It was beautiful
of you to say that. I'm touched.

- You sure are, fool.
- And so are you, Hannibal.

Cutter is crazy. Come on.
He killed his partner.

- He's got the cops out lookin' for us, and you're gonna go to his office.
- Yeah.

- Oh, good morning, Mr. Cutter.
- Hold all my calls.

- There haven't been any calls, sir. The phone lines are out.
- What?

Luckily, somebody reported it last
night, and the repairman just got here.

Um...

What are you doing?

This little orange sucker
rolled right under the desk.

How much longer will you be, do you think?
I told you to be out of here by 9:00.

- Yeah, I heard you.
- I'm really sorry, Mr. Cutter.

I, uh... I take it that
you've had no word yet?

No. Give me and Bo a minute.

- Some coffee?
- Get out!

- Please finish up.
- Yes, ma'am.

- What's the word from Gillis?
- Nothin', I guess.

Nothin', you guess?
"Nothin' I guess"?

How can I use a "nothin' I guess"? When
am I gonna get the use of my phone back?

Why don't ya put this thing back
together and get outta here!

Well!

I guess I just don't have the
knack of fixin' those things.

Didn't do too well at the catering business either
this weekend. Loused up your wedding and everything.

You. Get him!

Ah, ah.

Just stand still, sonny.

Jackie... Now, what'd you do to her?
'Cause if you've hurt her...

A pretty girl like that?

Hey, she's in terrific shape.

And... she made a lovely bride.

What?

Do you, Jaclyn Leigh Taylor...

take... Templeton Peck...

to be your lawfully
wedded husband?

I do.

And do you, Templeton Peck...

take Jackie to be your
lawfully wedded wife?

What is that?

- Her wedding movies.
- Wedding!

Uh, yeah, yeah. I do.

The ring, please.

Here's a copy of the
marriage certificate.

It was a beautiful ceremony.
Too bad you couldn't make it.

- What is going on?
- You're gonna take the heat off us...

and we're gonna get out
of this county safely...

or that good-lookin' guy on the videotape
there is gonna take an office down the hall.

And since he now has controlling
interest in Taylor-Cutter Enterprises...

bring me in as his
new administrator.

First thing I'd do is
upgrade the phone system.

Second thing I'd do is fire the entire
executive staff starting with you.

- What about Jackie?
- She goes with us.

See you later.

- Are you always this quick?
- Oh, I, uh... I... Gee, I-I'm real sorry.

I, uh... I thought you... What'd
you sneak up on me for like that?

I just came to relieve you.
You've been on duty all morning.

You can go join the others. Ahh,
I feel real bad about this.

- I know how uncomfortable you are around me and all.
- Oh, you kidding?

Don't be ridiculous. It's, uh...
It's nothing.

- Have you ever been married before in the line of duty?
- No.

No doubt about it, we're
talking a real first here.

Well, I don't think we're going
anyplace for a few hours...

and I'd kinda like to know a
little something about my husband.

That's good. Keeping
double watch.

Keeps you from dropping your, uh...
guard.

Sorry I'm late, but I had to
stop for some burgers. Come on.

Food? Hannibal,
I'm in your debt.

Yeah. Me too.

- Did you get the tape?
- No, but I know it's there.

- Almost had my hand on it when I was interrupted.
- Ohh.

- Which means you're going back.
- Well, which means... Face and I are going back.

- After all, he owns the stock Cutter's after.
- Just lost my appetite.

I didn't go through all this to
give away my piece of the company.

I couldn't take the tape when Cutter could see me,
otherwise he'd never let us out of the county.

- That's gonna come out all right.
- Ain't nothin' gonna work out without my tools, Hannibal.

Oh, wow! You went to
Hamburger Heaven!

Home of Captain Bellybuster,
America's hero!

Did you get me a Bellybustin' Surprise
Pack, Hannibal? Did ya, did ya, did ya?

Uh, sorry, Murdock, but...

with six Tummy Tingler malts,
look what you get free.

A Captain Bellybuster cap!

Out of the blue,
I'm coming at you.

Super-nutritious and
super-delicious!

Hannibal, I can't do nothin' under
there without my tools, man.

Sorry, B.A. I had to
leave 'em behind.

But when I was up in Cutter's building, I saw
something else that'll get us out of this county.

- Calvin's helicopter!
- No way, man!

B.A., will you relax
and eat your sandwich?

I ain't eatin' none of your food, Hannibal.
Knock me out and drag me on some helicopter.

B.A., you are getting crazy.

I am, huh?

You got somethin' to say?

- Guess the food didn't agree with him.
- Oh, great.

Our only way out of the county is by air,
and our only pilot is now unconscious.

Well, looks like we
won't be flyin'.

How'd I do?

They're here, Cal.

- How you doin', Calvin?
- You got the ownership papers?

By the way, I don't believe we've had the pleasure.
Templeton Peck of the Los Angeles Pecks.

I, uh, think you know my wife.

Sore loser.

- Sign.
- Oh.

Um, would you mind if...

Thanks. Excuse me.

Just sign 'em.

Ah! Heh!

Bo, why don't ya
call Sheriff Gillis?

- Tell him to call off the roadblock.
Oh, I... I wouldn't bother doing that.

- Uh, Mr. Peck.
- Yes, Mr. Smith?

I'd hold off signing
those papers too.

- Oh, don't get cute with me.
- You're not my type.

There's a little voice in my head that keeps telling me you
didn't get to be king of this county by dealing straight.

- Get to the chase.
- We'll go on up to the roof.

Then we'll sign the ownership papers, and
you'll loan us your chopper to fly outta here.

- Hey, no way!
- It's a deal. Let's go.

- Cal!
- Let's go!

Mr. Peck. And don't
forget the chopper keys.

Get the keys.

Keys, please.

I guess that does it. Now
you've got the whole company.

We'll write when
we get settled in.

Cover 'em!

What'd you get out of my desk?

I didn't do anything.

Well, it seems like your ex-partner had a very
suspicious nature, so he bugged his office.

He turned on his recorder every time he was talking
to somebody, like the night he was killed.

Well, you may as well give me
back that tape and the keys.

- You mean these aren't the real keys?
- Oh, they're the real keys all right...

but, uh, you ain't about to
get in that bird, partner.

Oh, these are the
real keys, Face.

The real keys.

Get the other keys!

I can't believe this worked.
We're gonna get away!

Consider it a wedding present to you...
and Face.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, girl.
Take it easy now.

- What's the matter?
- We outta juice.

It was full when we took
it from the TV station.

Yeah, but you never get good
gas mileage in the city.

- Eh, what happens now?
- We going down, boy.

- Tryin' to get us on target.
- What target?

- You got a map that
covers the entire county?

Fill 'er up. High octane.

All right. I'll do it.

Here's the leak.

Took some lead in
the old bucket.

Can ya help me?

Oh, it'll only drain again.

Well, we made six miles
from Cutter's building.

Uh, county line's four from here. So
let's fill 'er up and take another hop.

Till the tank's drained
and we crash again?

As crashes go, this was nothin'. Wait'll
the next one. That'll be a crash.

- Thank you.
- I'm all outta dough. Anybody got any?

Hey! Over there.

I gotta get something. Uh,
Murdock, take care of this man.

I leave with you my Captain Bellybuster cap
for security. Now, you take good care of it.

I promise you, I will return for
my Captain Bellybuster cap.

Get down and stay on 'em.

Eh, Murdock?

Murdock, you're crazy!

That guy's crazy, Mr. Cutter.

Keep on 'em. Don't loose 'em.

Enjoying your ride, huh, B.A.?

We can't let 'em get out of
the county with that tape.

Murdock, I think you're
in somebody's backyard.

What's this guy doin'?

He's tryin' to get me
tangled up in those trees.

Tough luck, fellas.

- Over the county line!
- Naturally.

Listen to that! I've never heard
her make a sound like that before.

Where are we, man?

Well, that was pretty painless, considering
what I've heard about divorces.

- That was an annulment, Face.
- Whatever. Of course, I did take a beating.

Could've taken you to the cleaners
over a community property settlement.

But then I'd have had to take you to court,
and we all know how you feel about those.

Well, Face, how does it feel
to be a free man again?

I just wish I didn't have to wear
this cast for another two weeks.

- My foot, it keeps...
- Don't say it!

I still owe you guys for
crashin' me in that helicopter.

What're you complaining? What're you complaining
for? You're the only one who didn't get hurt.

I guess what they say about not
tensing up on impact is true.

Not to mention he's
built like a...

cute, cuddly, little teddy bear.

Boy, this is really...

irritating.

I can't thank you guys
enough for helpin' me...

gettin' me away, helpin' me prove
Calvin killed my father.

I just wish I could tell
people what y'all have done.

Better not mention our names. Besides,
our testimony would be suspect.

I certainly couldn't testify. They cannot
force a wife to incriminate her spouse.

I just wish I knew what a creep that
guy was before I agreed to marry him.

I'm sorry things couldn't have
worked out another way, but, uh...

now that you've dumped your husband,
what are you doing tonight?

Mmm.

I think things worked out great.

Besides, Face, you're
not the marrying kind.

It would take you about a week
to get the seven-year itch.

Don't say "itch"!