Stumptown (2019–…): Season 1, Episode 3 - Rip City Dicks - full transcript
In hopes of becoming a certified private investigator, Dex seeks mentorship from veteran PI Artie Banks; Hoffman grows suspicious of Grey after evidence proves that he has a connection to a dead ex-con.
Previously on "Stumptown"...
Sometimes people
have problems.
The kind of problems that
the police can't help with.
Grey: You, a PI?
You can barely find your keys
half the time.
Might keep me
out of trouble.
Hoffman:
She's good. She's smart.
Just don't want you compromising
your professional integrity
for whatever personal dynamic
the two of you might have.
If you want to do this thing
for real,
put in the hours.
Get yourself a license.
Jack Feeney.
Alright!
We're both on the hook
for this money.
We're talking about half a mil.
We got to get on the road.
Everything I got is right here.
I'm not going anywhere.
[ Sirens wailing ]
[ Keyboard clacking ]
[ Clears throat ]
[ Clacking stops ]
[ Clacking resumes ]
Assistant: Mr. Banks
is on his way up.
[ Sirens wailing ]
[ Funk music plays ]
[ Camera shutter clicking ]
♪♪
[ Engine revving, tires squeal ]
♪♪
[ Grunts ]
[ Groans ]
Good thing it's trash day.
[ Whip cracks ]
[ Gunshot ]
This is a robbery!
Come on! You!
Wallet! Now!
Gents...why all the fuss?
♪♪
[ Glass shatters ]
[ Grunting ]
[ Gun cocks ]
Which one of you clowns
is gonna buy me a drink?
[ Gunshot ]
[ Explosion ]
[ Music slows down, stops ]
[ Clacking continues ]
Assistant: Dex "Pa-rye-ose"
is here for you, sir.
Uh, Mr. Banks?
Beat it.
Excuse me, Mr. Banks?
I just need to have one word --
Wow!
♪♪
Wait just a minute,
young lady!
You can't go in there!
[ Sighs ]
Pretty crappy business model,
making potential clients wait.
You're not
a potential client.
You're Dexadrine Parios,
33,
former combat Marine
on disability.
Ruder than a mule with a mouth
full of bumblebees --
I coined that back in '83 --
and your checking account's been
overdrawn 16 times this year,
as recently as...
[ Keyboard clacks ]
...last week.
None of your business,
but my brother needed that money
for a soccer tournament.
Sweet story.
But you're still not a potential
client 'cause you're broke.
What kind of name is Dexadrine,
anyway?
Don't call me that.
How much must parents
detest a child
to name them Dexadrine?
I mean, seriously,
you were born,
and they took a look
at you and said,
"Oh, my God. Dexadrine.
Our child reminds us
of generic cough syrup."
Artie isn't exactly on
the Mt. Rushmore of names.
Look, I'm here
because I'm a P.I.
Never heard of you.
I'm currently unlicensed.
I need to get my 1,500 hours
of apprenticeship
so I can be certified
here in Oregon.
There are 522 P.I.'s in Portland
not named --
Arthur Banks.
58 years old.
Youngest minted detective
in Portland PD history.
Served 16 years
before sudden retirement.
Been a P.I. ever since.
Your first major case
was the widow of an Army vet.
You proved
that he was killed
because of substandard care
at a VA hospital.
You fight for the underdog.
I respect that.
What the hell is that?
I'm not sure exactly.
I just know it's expensive.
It's hideous.
It cost $14,000.
[ Chuckles ]
Oh.
Huh. Okay, uh, look,
I have done my research.
You are the best.
If I apprentice under you,
I'm gonna get more clients.
I can increase my rates.
Sell me.
Why should I take time
out of my glorious life
to help you better yours,
Dexadrine?
Dex.
Uh...I need the money.
Nope.
I haven't been doing this
for a very long time,
but I actually think
that I could --
No.
Lemme get my hours,
I'll give you a cut
of all my jobs for a year.
I'll grab my pants,
and let's go.
Hey, Feeney. It's Grey.
Yeah,
I'm just checking in, man.
I...I want to see
if you left town
and if our friend reached out
to you again, okay?
Hit me back.
[ Cellphone beeps ]
Hey, Feeney. It's Grey.
Yeah,
I'm just checking in, man.
I...I want to see
if you left town
and if our friend reached out
to you again, okay?
Cosgrove: I just got off
the phone with the mayor.
[ Cellphone beeps ]
Colonoscopy-level joy.
What did he want?
Nothing much.
Body gets dumped under a bridge,
two bullet holes to the back.
My guess --
he wants to know
what the hell
we're doing about it.
I'm on it.
I have a lead.
Bar owner.
Grey McConnell.
Okay.
Last person to leave a message
on the vic's phone.
He's also a friend
of Dex Parios.
Have you ever...been to Tokyo,
Hoffman?
No.
So, there's this dog.
I don't remember his name,
but he would meet his owner
at the train station
every day after work.
Anyway, the guy passes away
on the job,
but the dog continues to show up
every single day,
hoping to see his owner.
Eight years.
Until the dog died.
I get it, Lieutenant.
Feels like Dex
is everywhere.
Dex isn't the dog.
♪♪
Candace is in the middle
of a nasty divorce battle
with Randall Tapper, mega-rich
real-estate developer.
He's got more people
in his pocket than I do.
He's constantly dropping loot
on charities,
opening kids' hospitals,
boring stuff like that
so he can continue to appear
like the Archangel Gabriel.
But it works.
He's got this town greased.
We're here to convince Candace
that we can flip the script.
What am I supposed to do?
Don't talk. Until it's time
to talk. Then talk.
How will I --
You'll know.
[ Knock on door ]
Artie Banks,
elite private investigator.
[ Baby coos ]
We spoke on the phone.
My final custody hearing
is next week,
and the deck is completely
stacked against me.
[ Baby coos ]
Why do you guys
want to help me?
I get 10% of the divorce
settlement.
[ Sighs ]
Capped at $200,000.
Look, I've been burned
a lot this year...
by people saying
they want to help me,
only to back out because
of Randall's influence.
I don't know what
you're going through,
but I can tell you this --
we can help.
♪♪
Yeah, um...
I take care
of my brother.
It's just him and me.
My parents, they...well,
it doesn't matter,
but, um, you know,
he's all I got.
I can't imagine anyone ever
coming and taking him away.
I...I-I-I wouldn't
let them.
So...
♪♪
Okay.
Let's do this.
I can't give up.
If you were to dig up
dirt on Randall,
where would you start?
His business.
Randall will do anything
to make a buck.
I want a fresh start,
for me and my daughter.
[ Sirens wailing,
dog barking ]
Here you go.
What's this?
Finder's fee.
You used me
to manipulate her,
and now you're gonna give me
a couple of bills
when you could be collecting
200K?
Exactly right.
First rule of private
investigation --
manipulation
is your best weapon.
Listen, I'm not really good
at this mentoring thing,
so this is your first
and last lesson.
So, take it in, cherish it,
breathe deep,
and learn to live with it.
Okay, you know,
I-I think your client --
she's gonna be pretty upset
when I just disappear.
You still have this case
because of me,
so here's what's
gonna happen, okay?
I'm staying, you're gonna sign
my apprentice hours
when we're done,
and you're gonna give me 2%
of whatever you collect
from Candace.
♪♪
Are you in it for the cash
or for the girl?
20% girl, 80% cash.
There's hope for you yet.
So, now what?
We bug Tapper's office.
Is that even legal?
For me, highly illegal
because I'm licensed.
For you,
it's only vaguely unethical.
Well, how am I supposed to get
into Tapper's office?
We go shopping.
♪♪
Raji: No, you're killing me
here, man.
We had a deal. We had --
Yeah, no.
I'm saying what we need
to get done is this right now.
Uh, deliveries
for Mr. Tapper.
Thandie sick again?
Yeah, I'm filling in.
Yeah -- No, no, no.
Mr. Tapper doesn't want
a Chagall.
He wants a Miró.
Eh -- Hold on.
Uh, letters in the bin on
the desk, packages in the box.
Got it.
How -- How far
do we go back, man?
I was in your bar mitzvah!
Yeah, for sure.
Oh, okay.
♪♪
[ Sighs ]
What?
♪♪
Good afternoon, Mr. Tapper.
What do you got for me?
Your afternoon schedule.
Oh, uh, your 4:00 P.M.
was pushed, and...
unfortunately,
the Miró is no longer for sale.
Everything is for sale,
Raji.
♪♪
Well, you're new.
Oh, hello.
Randall Tapper.
Oh. Dex.
Well,
glad to have you, Dex.
Eh, tag is still
on your jacket.
Oh.
Eh, it's fine.
It's -- Sorry.
it's really bothering me.
You don't -- Oh.
Yeah.
See? Not a problem.
Got it.
And welcome.
My door's open
if you ever have any problem.
Genuinely.
Thank you.
♪♪
Oh, I need a beer.
[ Grunts ]
And new feet.
The wire's up and running.
Oh, good.
I hope you didn't
mess up that suit.
I want to return it.
You got talent.
You're green,
but you could be good, Dex.
[ Car rumbling ]
Hey.
What the --
[ Metal clanks ]
Oh!
[ Tires squeal ]
Hey, is that our --
Yep.
[ Tires squeal ]
[ Car horn blares ]
[ Tires squealing,
car horns honking ]
No, no, no, no,
no, no, no, no.
Brake it! Brake it!
Brake it! Brake it!
[ Screams ]
Brake it! Oh, no!
♪♪
♪♪
Wheels don't
just fall off of cars.
That was sabotage.
Dex: So, what?
They're --
They're trying to kill us?
Or warn us off.
It was either Randall
or some Portland scum activist
mad salty I drive an SUV.
Neither of those
are comforting.
Dex, as a veteran P.I.,
I consider myself a leprechaun,
and danger is the rainbow
leading to the pot of gold.
Yeah, I got it.
Yep.
You know
this isn't a real car?
It's a golf cart
with doors.
Well, it works.
It's not totaled
like yours.
[ Car hits bump,
tape deck whirs ]
♪ I can sense your needs ♪
♪ Like rain unto the seeds ♪
It's...
It's weird.
♪ ...of confusion in your mind ♪
[ Volume decreases ]
[ Sighs ]
I know Chaka.
Her uncle was extorting her.
Late '90s.
I convinced him
to back off.
Three weeks later,
we were sipping Dom
in a villa in Mykonos.
She's a very...
sensual woman.
♪ I'm every woman ♪
♪ It's all in me ♪
[ Rock music plays ]
Dex ain't here, man.
Not here for Dex.
I'm here for a Manhattan.
Rye or bourbon
in that Manhattan?
Bourbon.
Bourbon.
Must be nice opening a bar
in your hometown.
Oh, I'm not from Portland.
Oh, yeah? Stumptown.
Born and raised.
Me and my buddies --
we always wanted to open a bar.
Hey, rude question,
but I'm curious --
what's it cost to get something
like this off the ground?
Rye.
Better, in my opinion.
You did time with Jack Feeney,
yeah?
Name sounds familiar, but I did
time with a lot of folks.
Just asking. He was floating
around Portland also.
Prison's not a frat.
We don't do reunions.
[ Both laugh ]
Funny.
Yeah.
That's funny.
I don't know. I mean,
you turned things around.
Opened a bar.
I thought maybe
he'd reach out to you.
How's the drink?
♪♪
[ Clears throat ]
Meant to come by Tuesday night,
but I got held up.
Were you here?
I always am.
Is there anything else
I can help you with?
I'm just making
conversation.
I'm not that type
of bartender.
♪♪
You know...
not a big fan of rye.
16 bucks.
All yours.
You know, I know you two
don't keep in touch,
but, uh...
Feeney's dead.
Whoever shot him did it
while he was running away.
♪♪
Hey.
What are you doing here?
Day off. Thought I'd just check
this place out for real.
Artie Banks?
Detective Hoffman.
Do you guys
know each other?
Yeah, Artie's a legend
in these streets.
But no one seems to know why he
left the force back in the day.
I don't know what kind
of car you drive,
but I'm pretty sure
it's not a sick Mustang.
Excuse me.
Yeah, I'm apprenticing
or whatever with Artie.
You know,
locking in my hours.
Making this
P.I. thing official?
Trying to.
Respect.
What is his deal?
He seems a little --
Weird?
Yeah.
Yeah, sure.
But he's great
at what he does.
Look, you're definitely gonna
learn something.
[ Chuckles ]
Just don't go
all big time on me.
No, I won't.
♪♪
Grey...this is Artie.
Artie, Grey.
Hey.
Dex says we drink here
for free.
♪♪
[ Groans ]
Hey.
Something wrong with you?
Other than you offering
your sweetheart drink deal
to every P.I. in Portland?
[ Scoffs ]
If you want me to pay, I'll pay.
That's a lie.
It's a huge lie.
[ Chuckles lightly ]
I don't know. You just
seem a little off.
No, I'm good.
Dex.
What's up?
Tapper just called his bank,
made a wire transfer
of $2,000
from his personal account.
So?
That's not Daddy Warbucks
real-estate money.
Plus,
he called it in himself.
I've been at this game
a long time.
My gut tells me whatever's
on the other end
of that wire transfer
is dirt.
Okay. Well, who did Tapper
wire the money to?
Stephanie Houston.
Stephanie: Look who it is.
America's least favorite white,
cisgendered P.I.
I have no idea what the hell
that is, but I'm sure I hate it.
What's up? This is an incredibly
challenging chain stitch.
Why is Randall Tapper wiring
money to a Portland madam?
You're a madam, he's a John,
we're P.I.'s --
Dude, your patriarchal terms for
sex work are killing my vibe.
I know Randall Tapper sent you
$2,000 today.
In fact, I dug a little deeper,
into your trash bins --
Actually, I did that.
...and my associate
found bank statements confirming
Randall's been sending you
a recurring wire of $2,000.
How many months
has that been going on for?
My business is built
on discretion.
Discretion [chuckles lightly]
is integral
to my business as well.
I have a long payroll
and really powerful clients,
and I know
that with one phone call,
I could sink your business.
♪♪
So, we just need you to confirm
that Randall Tapper's
utilizing your services,
and then we can all go back
about our respective
businesses...with discretion.
♪♪
When I began this,
I was just matching
college girls
with rich friends.
Randall isn't paying me
for new women.
It's hush money.
I sent him one girl
a long time ago.
He married her.
Why lie to the only people
who are trying to help you?
What?
I didn't lie to you.
You could've told us you were a
prostitute when you met Randall.
[ Sighs ]
Artie, come on.
That is not true.
Stephanie Houston
says otherwise.
You knocked on my door.
Now you're coming
at me like this?
Alright, let's just back off
a bit, alright?
Can you just tell us
what is going on?
[ Sighs ]
I was a broke
college student from Wyoming.
Naive.
[ Baby crying ]
I wanted to be independent,
but living on your own is real.
I had real bills.
So, I met this woman
at a bar who told me
that she knew people --
men that were willing to help.
I went on a date
with Randall.
48 hours later, I was having
dinner with him in Rome.
It was an arrangement...
until I fell in love with him
like everybody else does.
He can use this
against you.
He won't.
It would be bad for his image,
which would be bad
for his business,
and that's the only thing
he cares about more
than punishing me.
I'm gonna lose my kid.
So, do you want
to judge me some more,
or do what you promised
you'd do?
[ Knock on door ]
[ Inhales deeply,
dog barking in background ]
Huh.
Weird.
Hello.
May I come in?
[ Insects chirping ]
Well...this is
as I'd expect.
No one throws shade
quite like you.
You want a beer?
I don't drink beer.
Good, 'cause this is
my last one.
I-I don't know
why you're here,
but, uh, I'm on a case
right now,
one with a pretty fat payday
at the end, so...
There's no payday
at the end of this.
Simply pain
and embarrassment.
Randall Tapper is a friend.
He tells me there's a P.I. named
Artie Banks digging in on him.
I'm not sure
what that has to do with me.
Do you think I came down here
on a hunch?
Portland is a small town.
[ Chuckles ]
What are you into with him?
Randall is a supporter
of the Confederated Tribes.
That means I don't enjoy folks
trying to take him down.
Well,
I appreciate you popping in,
but it's getting
kind of late.
Name your price.
Price?
For backing off of Randall.
You know, there's a woman --
his wife --
whose life
he is destroying?
I don't get involved
in other people's relationships.
[ Chuckles ]
Oh, wow.
God, this is an odd way
to thank me
for saving your granddaughter
from -- oh, what was it?
Ah.
It was murder.
Randall is off limits.
I say this with a smile.
Next time, I won't be smiling.
That's too bad.
The righteous man
takes his life in his hand
every time
he utters the truth.
Be careful, Dex.
♪♪
[ Footsteps departing ]
[ Telephones ringing ]
What's the latest
on Grey McConnell?
I approached him
for an informal interview,
and he was, uh, evasive.
So, is he a liar
or a suspect?
That's what I'm trying
to figure out.
His alibi is that he was at
his bar the night of the murder.
Oh, what's the bar?
[ Pen clicks ]
The Bad Alibi.
[ Exhales sharply ]
That is an unfortunate name.
[ Snorts ]
Mm.
You been able to confirm?
As of yet, no.
You said that he was a friend
of Parios, right?
I don't think it's a good move
to bring Dex in.
She can confirm
or deny his alibi.
Yeah, but she's too smart to
give up anything at the station.
I do not have another
timely Japanese parable
to share with you right now,
but I hope that you think
you're smarter
than Dex, Detective.
I can always go
and hire her.
Hmm.
Understood, Lieutenant.
Alright.
[ Telephone rings ]
I hate this.
Stakeouts are for rookie
investigators.
Well, we had no choice
after your bug went dead.
Tapper keeps
a strict routine.
Gym, work, golf,
dinner, home.
Nothing at all to help Candace,
so...
He still manages
to make the headlines.
Let me see that.
Sue Lynn Blackbird
came to see me last night.
She told me
to back off Tapper.
"Name your price,"
she said.
We're gonna make so much cash
we can wipe our mouths with it.
[ Cellphone buzzes ]
[ Cellphone beeps ]
Hoffman?
Hoffman: I am inviting you
to dinner.
Oh. I decline.
Why?
I'm gonna cook.
'Cause that sounds like a date,
and dates are for...
normal people.
Besides, I thought that we were,
you know, a one-night thing?
You do eat,
don't you, Dex?
Alone, in my car.
Plus, I'm at work.
Oh, yeah.
In perpetuity?
Listen, call it whatever
you want to call it.
You're coming over.
[ Chuckles ]
Or I'm gonna bring dinner
to your car.
Either way,
you're eating with me.
Um...
So?
[ Sighs ] Yeah.
Okay.
Tomorrow night.
My place.
Great.
[ Cellphone beeps ]
Hoffman's a good cop.
He might know something
about our target.
First rule of private
investigating --
exploit your contacts.
Yeah?
And if this thing with Hoffman
doesn't lead us anywhere?
First rule of life --
people don't change.
If Tapper's taken a shine
to being a sugar daddy,
he hasn't changed.
There's a new Candace
out there.
You want to know what
the second rule of life is?
Not really.
It's the same.
People don't change.
They might switch things up
a bit,
but they always go back
to who they are.
Well, that's it.
What?
Tapper is not gonna lead us
anywhere, not now.
I mean,
if he's doing dirt,
he's gonna be extra careful
about it.
We're following
the wrong guy.
Tapper's manservant Raji
is definitely doing
his dirty work for him.
About time we got crunk.
Crunk?
[ Funk music plays ]
Basic GPS tracker.
Turn it on like so --
Mm-hmm.
...attaches to the undercarriage
of the vehicle.
Wherever Raji goes,
we follow.
You want me to do this?
Or have your apprentice
do it.
♪♪
♪♪
[ Car alarm chirps ]
♪♪
[ Sighs ]
[ Car alarm chirps ]
Of course.
Why do I need anything else?
♪♪
[ Engine starts ]
♪♪
♪♪
♪♪
[ Sighs ]
[ Jazz music plays ]
[ Knock on door ]
♪♪
Hey.
Hey.
[ Sniffs ] Mmm.
Smells like, uh...food.
Salmon, roasted asparagus,
cheddar mashed potatoes.
Wow.
Mom's recipe.
Beer?
Yeah, thanks.
Cheers.
And jazz.
It's a...little cliché,
no?
Not just jazz.
It's Mingus.
Okay, not everybody
can handle Mingus.
Hmm.
Get this fish
out of the oven.
♪♪
What's all this?
Murder investigation.
Jack Feeney.
You know him?
Why would I know him?
He's just been around Portland.
Just asking.
♪♪
Yeah, no, I've been,
uh, [exhales sharply]
been tied up with Artie
on this case.
Uh, Randall Tapper.
Real-estate developer?
Yeah, you know him?
He's a friend of the PD.
Two years ago,
he outfitted
the entire department
with new body armor.
Alright.
♪♪
Nice bar.
Which bar?
Your buddy's place.
McConnell?
Oh.
He seems like a good guy.
Is he there every night?
Well, you should have
asked him yourself.
You like
your salmon medium?
Sure.
[ Plates scrape ]
♪♪
Yeah, so I think Tapper
has a taste for prostitutes.
Wish that were a unique trait
for rich, white dudes.
[ Chuckles ]
Does Grey live at the bar?
You should have invited
Grey to dinner.
Just making small talk.
No, you're not...
making small talk.
You're --
You're working me.
You know that I was military
intelligence, right?
Do you think that Grey
had something to do
with this guy's murder?
I didn't say that.
Well.
This was great.
Dex. Okay.
[ Clears throat ]
Am I really the only one
that's working here?
Huh? I'm pretty sure you're
playing me for intel on Tapper.
Okay.
You're leaving?
Yeah, apparently I am,
because neither of us
are gonna get
what we want, so...
If you think I invited
you over here
just to interrogate you,
you don't know me at all.
I don't know you at all.
I'd like that to change.
Frankly, I don't care
if you only came
to get intel on Tapper.
You're here.
I like that.
[ Sighs ]
I don't want you to go.
You know, Grey had nothing to do
with whatever...
happened to that guy,
okay?
Yeah,
I'm done talking about Grey.
♪♪
Are you trying
to seduce me?
[ Smooches ]
Is that what I'm doing?
It's not working.
Feels like it is.
Really?
[ Smooches ]
Really.
Listen, if we do this,
it's not because
you seduced me, okay?
It's because
I want to get off.
♪♪
♪♪
Oof.
If you want, I could heat up
the food for you.
Nah, I'm good.
[ Cellphone buzzing ]
[ Cellphone beeps ]
Hey, Artie, what's up?
Raji's tracker brought me
to this woman's house.
Picked her up and took her
to the Irvington.
A no-tell hotel.
Okay, I'll meet you there.
[ Cellphone beeps ]
Thanks.
♪♪
♪♪
You know, the only thing missing
from this car is a vanity plate
that says "Insecure Man."
Yeah, I tried.
It wouldn't fit.
Well, Hoffman was a bust.
What did I miss?
Raji's parked
right over there.
Mm-hmm.
No sign of Tapper.
Great.
[ Sniffs ]
You smell like sex.
[ Sniffs ]
And salmon.
[ Chuckles ] What?
[ Scoffs ]
How are you the best private
detective in Portland?
That's -- [ Chuckles ]
I mean...
Shut up.
Yeah? Why don't you
tell me about your date?
My date?
You sound like my dad.
Tell me about your dad.
Eh -- I didn't...
Y-You sound like a dad.
You don't sound
like my dad.
Tell me about your dad,
anyway.
I don't talk about him,
okay?
If you say so.
I have a daughter.
She lives in Chicago.
She's a teacher.
We didn't talk for a while,
about 10 years...
[ Inhales deeply ]
She had problems, mostly drugs.
But I never gave up
on her.
I wanted to.
I hated her for the hell
she put me through, but...
10 years later,
we're finally in a good place.
♪♪
You, uh --
You kind of remind me of her.
[ Chuckles lightly ]
Yeah?
♪♪
You should call your dad.
Just saying.
You might regret it
at some point if you don't.
[ Exhales sharply ]
Didn't you say people
don't change?
I say a lot of crap.
[ Chuckles softly ]
There we go.
Okay. Fingers crossed
Tapper comes out.
We put the sidepiece
in our vise,
get her to flip,
cash the check --
[ Engine starts ]
...then off to Outback.
What?
Outback Steakhouse.
Amazing establishment.
[ Vehicle departing ]
Alright.
Raj and Bree
are on the move.
Okay, there he is.
Alright.
♪♪
Bloomin' Onion,
here we come.
[ Gunshots ]
[ Grunts ]
[ Breathing shakily ]
[ Frequency ringing ]
[ Breathing heavily ]
-Medic!
-[ Screams ]
Medic!
[ Grunts ]
It's okay.
[ Tires squeal ]
Whoa! Whoa!
It's my former client,
Danny Dongelberg.
Oh, my God! [ Chuckles ]
I can't belive it.
Dongelberg.
That's his real name.
I mean, this guy -- he hired me,
he didn't pay me,
so I had to, uh --
[ Chuckles ] --
I had to garnish his wages.
Shut up! It's not funny, okay?
Just stop!
Are you okay?
I'm fine. I'm fine.
This is, uh -- This is
private investigating, Dex.
You're not doing
your job right
unless a few folks
want you dead.
♪♪
[ Engine starts ]
[ Exhales sharply ]
♪♪
Dex: Hey, Grey?
Hey.
Hey.
Man,
I had a crazy night.
I'm on my way out.
A former client of Artie's
shot at us.
Cops have an APB out.
Cool. Is that cool?
I don't know.
Uh, yeah, maybe.
You know, you're not doing
your job right
unless someone's
trying to kill you.
That doesn't sound like you.
I gotta go.
Hey, why is Hoffman
asking about you
and a dead guy
named Jack Feeney?
Oh, i-it's nothing.
Really.
I did time with Feeney.
You know, once a crook,
always a crook.
I mean,
you know how it is
trying to reinvent yourself,
right?
Okay. I'll see ya.
Bye.
Yeah.
♪♪
Hey, Frank.
Grey McConnell?
Old friends popping up
all over the place.
A word, please?
It's fine.
♪ One was a handsome man ♪
Believe it or not,
you were my next house call.
Oh, yeah?
Well, uh...
[ Clears throat ]
That's 8K.
It's all the cash I got. Please.
The rest is tied into the bar.
It's just a little gesture,
for the big man.
It's for Kane.
I do visit him
from time to time.
I want you to know
I'm not Jackie.
I'm not running.
[ Chuckles ]
Yeah, I heard about that.
Sounds like [exhales sharply]
he finally crossed
the wrong person.
[ Billiard balls clack ]
I can pay.
Mm-hmm.
I just need time,
but Kane's in jail for life,
and I'm not going anywhere,
you know? My life is here.
I got people here
who depend on me,
people I don't want
to put in any sort of danger.
$500,000.
Not $250,000.
That's insane.
That is what you owe
because your pal was an idiot.
Just make sure that bar of yours
stays profitable, Grey.
♪♪
[ Inhales deeply ]
We know you're Tapper's
new love interest,
and I'm gonna
be brutally honest,
this is not gonna end well
for you, Bree.
Here you go.
[ Clears throat ]
Randall is the first man
I've dated
who's been up front
about what he wanted.
And so was I.
But now,
it's more than that.
So, why would I help you
take down my boyfriend
to help that psycho
he's divorcing?
Look, you might not
want to work with us.
You don't know us.
I get it, okay?
But before you say no,
you should really
talk to someone
who knows the real Randall.
How long before
he took you to Rome?
The morning
after our first date.
I had to wait two days.
He told me he loved me
on the plane ride back.
I was f-frozen, shocked.
But it was the way
he looked at me
that finally turned me...
made me think
that this could be real.
He said my dreams
were his dreams.
When I got pregnant,
he didn't...
He wanted me
to have an abortion.
I wouldn't.
He insisted.
I wouldn't.
He choked me,
he slapped me,
I hit him back.
That made him angrier.
He tried to make my life
a living hell
in hopes that I would
change my mind.
I wouldn't.
[ Rattling ]
It is the only thing
I don't regret these days
about...
[sniffles] everything.
♪♪
[ Exhales sharply ]
I think I have something
that might help.
[ Laughing ]
[ Inhales sharply ]
Disgusting.
He's definitely not gonna fight
Candace for custody,
and he's gonna have to pay,
big time.
I'll handle it from here.
You did some really good work,
Dex.
Honestly.
We make a good duo.
[ Chuckles lightly ]
Rip City Dicks?
Oh.
You are
a strange...strange man.
See you around?
[ Engine starts ]
♪♪
Dongelberg.
♪♪
[ Tires screech ]
You're a friggin' maniac!
You're working for a maniac!
You bitch!
Hey!
Oh!
Oh.
What are you doing?
Calling the cops
for several attempts at murder.
No.
Stay down!
I don't know what he told you,
but Artie Banks ruined my life.
Shut up.
No, I hired him to do a job.
He got proof that my business
partner was stealing from me
and then sold him the very same
evidence I hired him to get.
It's true.
That's his game.
♪♪
[ Cellphone ringing ]
♪ I was made
for loving you, baby ♪
♪ You were made for loving me ♪
Pick up, you son of a bitch.
[ Tires squeal ]
Artie: You've reached
the A to the B.
Please leave a may-sage.
[ Beep ]
♪ You were made for loving me ♪
♪♪
This isn't right! Gah --
[ Music stops ]
You sold the tape
to Tapper?
Yep.
How much?
More than I would have got
from Candace.
Artie,
she is gonna lose her kid.
That's sad.
I really mean it.
But I'm not
in the morality business.
I'm a private investigator
for hire.
I go where the money goes.
Ugh, God,
this is so messed up.
This is so --
This is so messed up.
I told you exactly what I was
gonna do -- exploit, manipulate.
People don't change,
remember?
You took me for some doddering,
over-the-hill chump.
I played to that.
I told you
what you wanted to hear.
I'm not your daddy.
I'm not your mentor.
I'm a guy who can read people
really well.
I'm gonna report you.
You illegally bugged
a private citizen,
put a tracking device
on a car.
I didn't do those things.
You did.
I did you a favor.
You did us a favor?
You are
incredibly talented,
but there's one thing
standing in the way
of you being an exceptional
private investigator.
You care.
[ Sighs ]
One day, we're gonna run into
each other down the road
on a gig,
and you will thank me.
Bon voyage, kid.
How are you gonna look
Candace in the eye
and tell her
what you did?
I'm not.
[ Pen clicks ]
I, uh...
I never met Chaka Khan.
And I don't have a daughter.
[ Exhales sharply ]
♪♪
That's not gonna make you
feel any better.
[ Sighs ]
♪♪
Feeney. It's Grey.
Yeah,
I'm just checking in, man.
I...I want to see
if you left town
and if our friend reached out
to you again, okay?
Hit me back.
Okay, so I lied
to an off-duty cop.
You see my problem?
I've got a dead body,
you've got a history
with the victim,
you were in contact with him,
and you lied about it.
Am I a suspect?
You're the only suspect.
Well, why don't you
just ask me if I killed Feeney?
Go ahead and ask.
You don't have an alibi.
I was at the bar.
Alone.
That's not an alibi.
Well, I was there.
You're hiding something.
It's not a crime.
I don't want to stick you
with a murder
if you didn't do it,
but I will find something on you
if you don't cooperate.
[ Exhales sharply ]
It's blood from a stone,
man.
I don't know what Dex knows
about your past,
but I'm pretty sure
she wouldn't be too happy
to know she's playing house
with a potential murderer.
Man, I was wondering
if this was all about Dex.
You got it twisted if you think
that's how I go about my job.
[ Knock on door ]
[ Exhales sharply ]
♪♪
[ Door closes ]
♪♪
♪♪
You didn't murder Feeney.
[ Exhales sharply ]
My guys got CCTV feeds
from nearby.
We got you going into the bar
late that night,
getting out
early in the morning.
I got to tell you something --
uh, I also didn't
kill Biggie or Tupac.
The list goes on.
It's endless, really, of all
the people I didn't kill.
I think you do know
who killed him.
I think I'm gonna go.
I think that's my right.
So, this was fun.
I think you and Feeney
got wrapped up
in something
with your prison crew.
Feeney went left,
took a couple bullets,
now you're left
holding the bag.
I put Wallace Kane away,
you know?
I know him. Well.
Killed one of my C.I.'s
a few years back.
One of probably 50 bodies
that he dropped.
If I was under his thumb,
I'd be afraid,
whether he was
in jail or not.
I'd want help.
Protection.
And you'd be willing
to do me a solid, huh?
If you help me find
Feeney's killer.
Before he kills you.
[ Sighs ]
This offer's for right here,
right now.
Tomorrow?
I come after you.
Just do me a favor --
leave Dex out of this,
whatever it is
you think you're doing.
[ Knock on door ]
♪♪
[ Door closes ]
[ Siren wailing distantly ]
♪♪
[ Foot tapping ]
[ Sighs ]
Ah!
[ Tape deck whirs ]
[ Snap!'s "The Power" plays ]
♪♪
♪ I've got the power ♪
♪ Power ♪
♪♪
[ Engine starts ]
♪ I've got the power ♪
♪ Power ♪
[ Knock on door ]
Hey.
Um...
♪ I've got the power ♪
Today, I got beat.
I lost. We lost.
Artie sold me out,
and it [exhales sharply]
it pisses me off,
and it pisses me off
that my mistake
could cost you your child.
But they're not gonna
get away with this, okay?
No, they think
we're just gonna lie down
and we're gonna take it.
Yeah, you know,
they have the power
and they have
the influence and...
But you know what?
They're arrogant
sons of bitches,
and they don't know that women
like us have been fighting
our entire lives
for everything.
♪♪
Randall's gonna pay,
and Artie's gonna pay
for what he did.
And I...
I won't lose again.
♪ I've got the power ♪
Sometimes people
have problems.
The kind of problems that
the police can't help with.
Grey: You, a PI?
You can barely find your keys
half the time.
Might keep me
out of trouble.
Hoffman:
She's good. She's smart.
Just don't want you compromising
your professional integrity
for whatever personal dynamic
the two of you might have.
If you want to do this thing
for real,
put in the hours.
Get yourself a license.
Jack Feeney.
Alright!
We're both on the hook
for this money.
We're talking about half a mil.
We got to get on the road.
Everything I got is right here.
I'm not going anywhere.
[ Sirens wailing ]
[ Keyboard clacking ]
[ Clears throat ]
[ Clacking stops ]
[ Clacking resumes ]
Assistant: Mr. Banks
is on his way up.
[ Sirens wailing ]
[ Funk music plays ]
[ Camera shutter clicking ]
♪♪
[ Engine revving, tires squeal ]
♪♪
[ Grunts ]
[ Groans ]
Good thing it's trash day.
[ Whip cracks ]
[ Gunshot ]
This is a robbery!
Come on! You!
Wallet! Now!
Gents...why all the fuss?
♪♪
[ Glass shatters ]
[ Grunting ]
[ Gun cocks ]
Which one of you clowns
is gonna buy me a drink?
[ Gunshot ]
[ Explosion ]
[ Music slows down, stops ]
[ Clacking continues ]
Assistant: Dex "Pa-rye-ose"
is here for you, sir.
Uh, Mr. Banks?
Beat it.
Excuse me, Mr. Banks?
I just need to have one word --
Wow!
♪♪
Wait just a minute,
young lady!
You can't go in there!
[ Sighs ]
Pretty crappy business model,
making potential clients wait.
You're not
a potential client.
You're Dexadrine Parios,
33,
former combat Marine
on disability.
Ruder than a mule with a mouth
full of bumblebees --
I coined that back in '83 --
and your checking account's been
overdrawn 16 times this year,
as recently as...
[ Keyboard clacks ]
...last week.
None of your business,
but my brother needed that money
for a soccer tournament.
Sweet story.
But you're still not a potential
client 'cause you're broke.
What kind of name is Dexadrine,
anyway?
Don't call me that.
How much must parents
detest a child
to name them Dexadrine?
I mean, seriously,
you were born,
and they took a look
at you and said,
"Oh, my God. Dexadrine.
Our child reminds us
of generic cough syrup."
Artie isn't exactly on
the Mt. Rushmore of names.
Look, I'm here
because I'm a P.I.
Never heard of you.
I'm currently unlicensed.
I need to get my 1,500 hours
of apprenticeship
so I can be certified
here in Oregon.
There are 522 P.I.'s in Portland
not named --
Arthur Banks.
58 years old.
Youngest minted detective
in Portland PD history.
Served 16 years
before sudden retirement.
Been a P.I. ever since.
Your first major case
was the widow of an Army vet.
You proved
that he was killed
because of substandard care
at a VA hospital.
You fight for the underdog.
I respect that.
What the hell is that?
I'm not sure exactly.
I just know it's expensive.
It's hideous.
It cost $14,000.
[ Chuckles ]
Oh.
Huh. Okay, uh, look,
I have done my research.
You are the best.
If I apprentice under you,
I'm gonna get more clients.
I can increase my rates.
Sell me.
Why should I take time
out of my glorious life
to help you better yours,
Dexadrine?
Dex.
Uh...I need the money.
Nope.
I haven't been doing this
for a very long time,
but I actually think
that I could --
No.
Lemme get my hours,
I'll give you a cut
of all my jobs for a year.
I'll grab my pants,
and let's go.
Hey, Feeney. It's Grey.
Yeah,
I'm just checking in, man.
I...I want to see
if you left town
and if our friend reached out
to you again, okay?
Hit me back.
[ Cellphone beeps ]
Hey, Feeney. It's Grey.
Yeah,
I'm just checking in, man.
I...I want to see
if you left town
and if our friend reached out
to you again, okay?
Cosgrove: I just got off
the phone with the mayor.
[ Cellphone beeps ]
Colonoscopy-level joy.
What did he want?
Nothing much.
Body gets dumped under a bridge,
two bullet holes to the back.
My guess --
he wants to know
what the hell
we're doing about it.
I'm on it.
I have a lead.
Bar owner.
Grey McConnell.
Okay.
Last person to leave a message
on the vic's phone.
He's also a friend
of Dex Parios.
Have you ever...been to Tokyo,
Hoffman?
No.
So, there's this dog.
I don't remember his name,
but he would meet his owner
at the train station
every day after work.
Anyway, the guy passes away
on the job,
but the dog continues to show up
every single day,
hoping to see his owner.
Eight years.
Until the dog died.
I get it, Lieutenant.
Feels like Dex
is everywhere.
Dex isn't the dog.
♪♪
Candace is in the middle
of a nasty divorce battle
with Randall Tapper, mega-rich
real-estate developer.
He's got more people
in his pocket than I do.
He's constantly dropping loot
on charities,
opening kids' hospitals,
boring stuff like that
so he can continue to appear
like the Archangel Gabriel.
But it works.
He's got this town greased.
We're here to convince Candace
that we can flip the script.
What am I supposed to do?
Don't talk. Until it's time
to talk. Then talk.
How will I --
You'll know.
[ Knock on door ]
Artie Banks,
elite private investigator.
[ Baby coos ]
We spoke on the phone.
My final custody hearing
is next week,
and the deck is completely
stacked against me.
[ Baby coos ]
Why do you guys
want to help me?
I get 10% of the divorce
settlement.
[ Sighs ]
Capped at $200,000.
Look, I've been burned
a lot this year...
by people saying
they want to help me,
only to back out because
of Randall's influence.
I don't know what
you're going through,
but I can tell you this --
we can help.
♪♪
Yeah, um...
I take care
of my brother.
It's just him and me.
My parents, they...well,
it doesn't matter,
but, um, you know,
he's all I got.
I can't imagine anyone ever
coming and taking him away.
I...I-I-I wouldn't
let them.
So...
♪♪
Okay.
Let's do this.
I can't give up.
If you were to dig up
dirt on Randall,
where would you start?
His business.
Randall will do anything
to make a buck.
I want a fresh start,
for me and my daughter.
[ Sirens wailing,
dog barking ]
Here you go.
What's this?
Finder's fee.
You used me
to manipulate her,
and now you're gonna give me
a couple of bills
when you could be collecting
200K?
Exactly right.
First rule of private
investigation --
manipulation
is your best weapon.
Listen, I'm not really good
at this mentoring thing,
so this is your first
and last lesson.
So, take it in, cherish it,
breathe deep,
and learn to live with it.
Okay, you know,
I-I think your client --
she's gonna be pretty upset
when I just disappear.
You still have this case
because of me,
so here's what's
gonna happen, okay?
I'm staying, you're gonna sign
my apprentice hours
when we're done,
and you're gonna give me 2%
of whatever you collect
from Candace.
♪♪
Are you in it for the cash
or for the girl?
20% girl, 80% cash.
There's hope for you yet.
So, now what?
We bug Tapper's office.
Is that even legal?
For me, highly illegal
because I'm licensed.
For you,
it's only vaguely unethical.
Well, how am I supposed to get
into Tapper's office?
We go shopping.
♪♪
Raji: No, you're killing me
here, man.
We had a deal. We had --
Yeah, no.
I'm saying what we need
to get done is this right now.
Uh, deliveries
for Mr. Tapper.
Thandie sick again?
Yeah, I'm filling in.
Yeah -- No, no, no.
Mr. Tapper doesn't want
a Chagall.
He wants a Miró.
Eh -- Hold on.
Uh, letters in the bin on
the desk, packages in the box.
Got it.
How -- How far
do we go back, man?
I was in your bar mitzvah!
Yeah, for sure.
Oh, okay.
♪♪
[ Sighs ]
What?
♪♪
Good afternoon, Mr. Tapper.
What do you got for me?
Your afternoon schedule.
Oh, uh, your 4:00 P.M.
was pushed, and...
unfortunately,
the Miró is no longer for sale.
Everything is for sale,
Raji.
♪♪
Well, you're new.
Oh, hello.
Randall Tapper.
Oh. Dex.
Well,
glad to have you, Dex.
Eh, tag is still
on your jacket.
Oh.
Eh, it's fine.
It's -- Sorry.
it's really bothering me.
You don't -- Oh.
Yeah.
See? Not a problem.
Got it.
And welcome.
My door's open
if you ever have any problem.
Genuinely.
Thank you.
♪♪
Oh, I need a beer.
[ Grunts ]
And new feet.
The wire's up and running.
Oh, good.
I hope you didn't
mess up that suit.
I want to return it.
You got talent.
You're green,
but you could be good, Dex.
[ Car rumbling ]
Hey.
What the --
[ Metal clanks ]
Oh!
[ Tires squeal ]
Hey, is that our --
Yep.
[ Tires squeal ]
[ Car horn blares ]
[ Tires squealing,
car horns honking ]
No, no, no, no,
no, no, no, no.
Brake it! Brake it!
Brake it! Brake it!
[ Screams ]
Brake it! Oh, no!
♪♪
♪♪
Wheels don't
just fall off of cars.
That was sabotage.
Dex: So, what?
They're --
They're trying to kill us?
Or warn us off.
It was either Randall
or some Portland scum activist
mad salty I drive an SUV.
Neither of those
are comforting.
Dex, as a veteran P.I.,
I consider myself a leprechaun,
and danger is the rainbow
leading to the pot of gold.
Yeah, I got it.
Yep.
You know
this isn't a real car?
It's a golf cart
with doors.
Well, it works.
It's not totaled
like yours.
[ Car hits bump,
tape deck whirs ]
♪ I can sense your needs ♪
♪ Like rain unto the seeds ♪
It's...
It's weird.
♪ ...of confusion in your mind ♪
[ Volume decreases ]
[ Sighs ]
I know Chaka.
Her uncle was extorting her.
Late '90s.
I convinced him
to back off.
Three weeks later,
we were sipping Dom
in a villa in Mykonos.
She's a very...
sensual woman.
♪ I'm every woman ♪
♪ It's all in me ♪
[ Rock music plays ]
Dex ain't here, man.
Not here for Dex.
I'm here for a Manhattan.
Rye or bourbon
in that Manhattan?
Bourbon.
Bourbon.
Must be nice opening a bar
in your hometown.
Oh, I'm not from Portland.
Oh, yeah? Stumptown.
Born and raised.
Me and my buddies --
we always wanted to open a bar.
Hey, rude question,
but I'm curious --
what's it cost to get something
like this off the ground?
Rye.
Better, in my opinion.
You did time with Jack Feeney,
yeah?
Name sounds familiar, but I did
time with a lot of folks.
Just asking. He was floating
around Portland also.
Prison's not a frat.
We don't do reunions.
[ Both laugh ]
Funny.
Yeah.
That's funny.
I don't know. I mean,
you turned things around.
Opened a bar.
I thought maybe
he'd reach out to you.
How's the drink?
♪♪
[ Clears throat ]
Meant to come by Tuesday night,
but I got held up.
Were you here?
I always am.
Is there anything else
I can help you with?
I'm just making
conversation.
I'm not that type
of bartender.
♪♪
You know...
not a big fan of rye.
16 bucks.
All yours.
You know, I know you two
don't keep in touch,
but, uh...
Feeney's dead.
Whoever shot him did it
while he was running away.
♪♪
Hey.
What are you doing here?
Day off. Thought I'd just check
this place out for real.
Artie Banks?
Detective Hoffman.
Do you guys
know each other?
Yeah, Artie's a legend
in these streets.
But no one seems to know why he
left the force back in the day.
I don't know what kind
of car you drive,
but I'm pretty sure
it's not a sick Mustang.
Excuse me.
Yeah, I'm apprenticing
or whatever with Artie.
You know,
locking in my hours.
Making this
P.I. thing official?
Trying to.
Respect.
What is his deal?
He seems a little --
Weird?
Yeah.
Yeah, sure.
But he's great
at what he does.
Look, you're definitely gonna
learn something.
[ Chuckles ]
Just don't go
all big time on me.
No, I won't.
♪♪
Grey...this is Artie.
Artie, Grey.
Hey.
Dex says we drink here
for free.
♪♪
[ Groans ]
Hey.
Something wrong with you?
Other than you offering
your sweetheart drink deal
to every P.I. in Portland?
[ Scoffs ]
If you want me to pay, I'll pay.
That's a lie.
It's a huge lie.
[ Chuckles lightly ]
I don't know. You just
seem a little off.
No, I'm good.
Dex.
What's up?
Tapper just called his bank,
made a wire transfer
of $2,000
from his personal account.
So?
That's not Daddy Warbucks
real-estate money.
Plus,
he called it in himself.
I've been at this game
a long time.
My gut tells me whatever's
on the other end
of that wire transfer
is dirt.
Okay. Well, who did Tapper
wire the money to?
Stephanie Houston.
Stephanie: Look who it is.
America's least favorite white,
cisgendered P.I.
I have no idea what the hell
that is, but I'm sure I hate it.
What's up? This is an incredibly
challenging chain stitch.
Why is Randall Tapper wiring
money to a Portland madam?
You're a madam, he's a John,
we're P.I.'s --
Dude, your patriarchal terms for
sex work are killing my vibe.
I know Randall Tapper sent you
$2,000 today.
In fact, I dug a little deeper,
into your trash bins --
Actually, I did that.
...and my associate
found bank statements confirming
Randall's been sending you
a recurring wire of $2,000.
How many months
has that been going on for?
My business is built
on discretion.
Discretion [chuckles lightly]
is integral
to my business as well.
I have a long payroll
and really powerful clients,
and I know
that with one phone call,
I could sink your business.
♪♪
So, we just need you to confirm
that Randall Tapper's
utilizing your services,
and then we can all go back
about our respective
businesses...with discretion.
♪♪
When I began this,
I was just matching
college girls
with rich friends.
Randall isn't paying me
for new women.
It's hush money.
I sent him one girl
a long time ago.
He married her.
Why lie to the only people
who are trying to help you?
What?
I didn't lie to you.
You could've told us you were a
prostitute when you met Randall.
[ Sighs ]
Artie, come on.
That is not true.
Stephanie Houston
says otherwise.
You knocked on my door.
Now you're coming
at me like this?
Alright, let's just back off
a bit, alright?
Can you just tell us
what is going on?
[ Sighs ]
I was a broke
college student from Wyoming.
Naive.
[ Baby crying ]
I wanted to be independent,
but living on your own is real.
I had real bills.
So, I met this woman
at a bar who told me
that she knew people --
men that were willing to help.
I went on a date
with Randall.
48 hours later, I was having
dinner with him in Rome.
It was an arrangement...
until I fell in love with him
like everybody else does.
He can use this
against you.
He won't.
It would be bad for his image,
which would be bad
for his business,
and that's the only thing
he cares about more
than punishing me.
I'm gonna lose my kid.
So, do you want
to judge me some more,
or do what you promised
you'd do?
[ Knock on door ]
[ Inhales deeply,
dog barking in background ]
Huh.
Weird.
Hello.
May I come in?
[ Insects chirping ]
Well...this is
as I'd expect.
No one throws shade
quite like you.
You want a beer?
I don't drink beer.
Good, 'cause this is
my last one.
I-I don't know
why you're here,
but, uh, I'm on a case
right now,
one with a pretty fat payday
at the end, so...
There's no payday
at the end of this.
Simply pain
and embarrassment.
Randall Tapper is a friend.
He tells me there's a P.I. named
Artie Banks digging in on him.
I'm not sure
what that has to do with me.
Do you think I came down here
on a hunch?
Portland is a small town.
[ Chuckles ]
What are you into with him?
Randall is a supporter
of the Confederated Tribes.
That means I don't enjoy folks
trying to take him down.
Well,
I appreciate you popping in,
but it's getting
kind of late.
Name your price.
Price?
For backing off of Randall.
You know, there's a woman --
his wife --
whose life
he is destroying?
I don't get involved
in other people's relationships.
[ Chuckles ]
Oh, wow.
God, this is an odd way
to thank me
for saving your granddaughter
from -- oh, what was it?
Ah.
It was murder.
Randall is off limits.
I say this with a smile.
Next time, I won't be smiling.
That's too bad.
The righteous man
takes his life in his hand
every time
he utters the truth.
Be careful, Dex.
♪♪
[ Footsteps departing ]
[ Telephones ringing ]
What's the latest
on Grey McConnell?
I approached him
for an informal interview,
and he was, uh, evasive.
So, is he a liar
or a suspect?
That's what I'm trying
to figure out.
His alibi is that he was at
his bar the night of the murder.
Oh, what's the bar?
[ Pen clicks ]
The Bad Alibi.
[ Exhales sharply ]
That is an unfortunate name.
[ Snorts ]
Mm.
You been able to confirm?
As of yet, no.
You said that he was a friend
of Parios, right?
I don't think it's a good move
to bring Dex in.
She can confirm
or deny his alibi.
Yeah, but she's too smart to
give up anything at the station.
I do not have another
timely Japanese parable
to share with you right now,
but I hope that you think
you're smarter
than Dex, Detective.
I can always go
and hire her.
Hmm.
Understood, Lieutenant.
Alright.
[ Telephone rings ]
I hate this.
Stakeouts are for rookie
investigators.
Well, we had no choice
after your bug went dead.
Tapper keeps
a strict routine.
Gym, work, golf,
dinner, home.
Nothing at all to help Candace,
so...
He still manages
to make the headlines.
Let me see that.
Sue Lynn Blackbird
came to see me last night.
She told me
to back off Tapper.
"Name your price,"
she said.
We're gonna make so much cash
we can wipe our mouths with it.
[ Cellphone buzzes ]
[ Cellphone beeps ]
Hoffman?
Hoffman: I am inviting you
to dinner.
Oh. I decline.
Why?
I'm gonna cook.
'Cause that sounds like a date,
and dates are for...
normal people.
Besides, I thought that we were,
you know, a one-night thing?
You do eat,
don't you, Dex?
Alone, in my car.
Plus, I'm at work.
Oh, yeah.
In perpetuity?
Listen, call it whatever
you want to call it.
You're coming over.
[ Chuckles ]
Or I'm gonna bring dinner
to your car.
Either way,
you're eating with me.
Um...
So?
[ Sighs ] Yeah.
Okay.
Tomorrow night.
My place.
Great.
[ Cellphone beeps ]
Hoffman's a good cop.
He might know something
about our target.
First rule of private
investigating --
exploit your contacts.
Yeah?
And if this thing with Hoffman
doesn't lead us anywhere?
First rule of life --
people don't change.
If Tapper's taken a shine
to being a sugar daddy,
he hasn't changed.
There's a new Candace
out there.
You want to know what
the second rule of life is?
Not really.
It's the same.
People don't change.
They might switch things up
a bit,
but they always go back
to who they are.
Well, that's it.
What?
Tapper is not gonna lead us
anywhere, not now.
I mean,
if he's doing dirt,
he's gonna be extra careful
about it.
We're following
the wrong guy.
Tapper's manservant Raji
is definitely doing
his dirty work for him.
About time we got crunk.
Crunk?
[ Funk music plays ]
Basic GPS tracker.
Turn it on like so --
Mm-hmm.
...attaches to the undercarriage
of the vehicle.
Wherever Raji goes,
we follow.
You want me to do this?
Or have your apprentice
do it.
♪♪
♪♪
[ Car alarm chirps ]
♪♪
[ Sighs ]
[ Car alarm chirps ]
Of course.
Why do I need anything else?
♪♪
[ Engine starts ]
♪♪
♪♪
♪♪
[ Sighs ]
[ Jazz music plays ]
[ Knock on door ]
♪♪
Hey.
Hey.
[ Sniffs ] Mmm.
Smells like, uh...food.
Salmon, roasted asparagus,
cheddar mashed potatoes.
Wow.
Mom's recipe.
Beer?
Yeah, thanks.
Cheers.
And jazz.
It's a...little cliché,
no?
Not just jazz.
It's Mingus.
Okay, not everybody
can handle Mingus.
Hmm.
Get this fish
out of the oven.
♪♪
What's all this?
Murder investigation.
Jack Feeney.
You know him?
Why would I know him?
He's just been around Portland.
Just asking.
♪♪
Yeah, no, I've been,
uh, [exhales sharply]
been tied up with Artie
on this case.
Uh, Randall Tapper.
Real-estate developer?
Yeah, you know him?
He's a friend of the PD.
Two years ago,
he outfitted
the entire department
with new body armor.
Alright.
♪♪
Nice bar.
Which bar?
Your buddy's place.
McConnell?
Oh.
He seems like a good guy.
Is he there every night?
Well, you should have
asked him yourself.
You like
your salmon medium?
Sure.
[ Plates scrape ]
♪♪
Yeah, so I think Tapper
has a taste for prostitutes.
Wish that were a unique trait
for rich, white dudes.
[ Chuckles ]
Does Grey live at the bar?
You should have invited
Grey to dinner.
Just making small talk.
No, you're not...
making small talk.
You're --
You're working me.
You know that I was military
intelligence, right?
Do you think that Grey
had something to do
with this guy's murder?
I didn't say that.
Well.
This was great.
Dex. Okay.
[ Clears throat ]
Am I really the only one
that's working here?
Huh? I'm pretty sure you're
playing me for intel on Tapper.
Okay.
You're leaving?
Yeah, apparently I am,
because neither of us
are gonna get
what we want, so...
If you think I invited
you over here
just to interrogate you,
you don't know me at all.
I don't know you at all.
I'd like that to change.
Frankly, I don't care
if you only came
to get intel on Tapper.
You're here.
I like that.
[ Sighs ]
I don't want you to go.
You know, Grey had nothing to do
with whatever...
happened to that guy,
okay?
Yeah,
I'm done talking about Grey.
♪♪
Are you trying
to seduce me?
[ Smooches ]
Is that what I'm doing?
It's not working.
Feels like it is.
Really?
[ Smooches ]
Really.
Listen, if we do this,
it's not because
you seduced me, okay?
It's because
I want to get off.
♪♪
♪♪
Oof.
If you want, I could heat up
the food for you.
Nah, I'm good.
[ Cellphone buzzing ]
[ Cellphone beeps ]
Hey, Artie, what's up?
Raji's tracker brought me
to this woman's house.
Picked her up and took her
to the Irvington.
A no-tell hotel.
Okay, I'll meet you there.
[ Cellphone beeps ]
Thanks.
♪♪
♪♪
You know, the only thing missing
from this car is a vanity plate
that says "Insecure Man."
Yeah, I tried.
It wouldn't fit.
Well, Hoffman was a bust.
What did I miss?
Raji's parked
right over there.
Mm-hmm.
No sign of Tapper.
Great.
[ Sniffs ]
You smell like sex.
[ Sniffs ]
And salmon.
[ Chuckles ] What?
[ Scoffs ]
How are you the best private
detective in Portland?
That's -- [ Chuckles ]
I mean...
Shut up.
Yeah? Why don't you
tell me about your date?
My date?
You sound like my dad.
Tell me about your dad.
Eh -- I didn't...
Y-You sound like a dad.
You don't sound
like my dad.
Tell me about your dad,
anyway.
I don't talk about him,
okay?
If you say so.
I have a daughter.
She lives in Chicago.
She's a teacher.
We didn't talk for a while,
about 10 years...
[ Inhales deeply ]
She had problems, mostly drugs.
But I never gave up
on her.
I wanted to.
I hated her for the hell
she put me through, but...
10 years later,
we're finally in a good place.
♪♪
You, uh --
You kind of remind me of her.
[ Chuckles lightly ]
Yeah?
♪♪
You should call your dad.
Just saying.
You might regret it
at some point if you don't.
[ Exhales sharply ]
Didn't you say people
don't change?
I say a lot of crap.
[ Chuckles softly ]
There we go.
Okay. Fingers crossed
Tapper comes out.
We put the sidepiece
in our vise,
get her to flip,
cash the check --
[ Engine starts ]
...then off to Outback.
What?
Outback Steakhouse.
Amazing establishment.
[ Vehicle departing ]
Alright.
Raj and Bree
are on the move.
Okay, there he is.
Alright.
♪♪
Bloomin' Onion,
here we come.
[ Gunshots ]
[ Grunts ]
[ Breathing shakily ]
[ Frequency ringing ]
[ Breathing heavily ]
-Medic!
-[ Screams ]
Medic!
[ Grunts ]
It's okay.
[ Tires squeal ]
Whoa! Whoa!
It's my former client,
Danny Dongelberg.
Oh, my God! [ Chuckles ]
I can't belive it.
Dongelberg.
That's his real name.
I mean, this guy -- he hired me,
he didn't pay me,
so I had to, uh --
[ Chuckles ] --
I had to garnish his wages.
Shut up! It's not funny, okay?
Just stop!
Are you okay?
I'm fine. I'm fine.
This is, uh -- This is
private investigating, Dex.
You're not doing
your job right
unless a few folks
want you dead.
♪♪
[ Engine starts ]
[ Exhales sharply ]
♪♪
Dex: Hey, Grey?
Hey.
Hey.
Man,
I had a crazy night.
I'm on my way out.
A former client of Artie's
shot at us.
Cops have an APB out.
Cool. Is that cool?
I don't know.
Uh, yeah, maybe.
You know, you're not doing
your job right
unless someone's
trying to kill you.
That doesn't sound like you.
I gotta go.
Hey, why is Hoffman
asking about you
and a dead guy
named Jack Feeney?
Oh, i-it's nothing.
Really.
I did time with Feeney.
You know, once a crook,
always a crook.
I mean,
you know how it is
trying to reinvent yourself,
right?
Okay. I'll see ya.
Bye.
Yeah.
♪♪
Hey, Frank.
Grey McConnell?
Old friends popping up
all over the place.
A word, please?
It's fine.
♪ One was a handsome man ♪
Believe it or not,
you were my next house call.
Oh, yeah?
Well, uh...
[ Clears throat ]
That's 8K.
It's all the cash I got. Please.
The rest is tied into the bar.
It's just a little gesture,
for the big man.
It's for Kane.
I do visit him
from time to time.
I want you to know
I'm not Jackie.
I'm not running.
[ Chuckles ]
Yeah, I heard about that.
Sounds like [exhales sharply]
he finally crossed
the wrong person.
[ Billiard balls clack ]
I can pay.
Mm-hmm.
I just need time,
but Kane's in jail for life,
and I'm not going anywhere,
you know? My life is here.
I got people here
who depend on me,
people I don't want
to put in any sort of danger.
$500,000.
Not $250,000.
That's insane.
That is what you owe
because your pal was an idiot.
Just make sure that bar of yours
stays profitable, Grey.
♪♪
[ Inhales deeply ]
We know you're Tapper's
new love interest,
and I'm gonna
be brutally honest,
this is not gonna end well
for you, Bree.
Here you go.
[ Clears throat ]
Randall is the first man
I've dated
who's been up front
about what he wanted.
And so was I.
But now,
it's more than that.
So, why would I help you
take down my boyfriend
to help that psycho
he's divorcing?
Look, you might not
want to work with us.
You don't know us.
I get it, okay?
But before you say no,
you should really
talk to someone
who knows the real Randall.
How long before
he took you to Rome?
The morning
after our first date.
I had to wait two days.
He told me he loved me
on the plane ride back.
I was f-frozen, shocked.
But it was the way
he looked at me
that finally turned me...
made me think
that this could be real.
He said my dreams
were his dreams.
When I got pregnant,
he didn't...
He wanted me
to have an abortion.
I wouldn't.
He insisted.
I wouldn't.
He choked me,
he slapped me,
I hit him back.
That made him angrier.
He tried to make my life
a living hell
in hopes that I would
change my mind.
I wouldn't.
[ Rattling ]
It is the only thing
I don't regret these days
about...
[sniffles] everything.
♪♪
[ Exhales sharply ]
I think I have something
that might help.
[ Laughing ]
[ Inhales sharply ]
Disgusting.
He's definitely not gonna fight
Candace for custody,
and he's gonna have to pay,
big time.
I'll handle it from here.
You did some really good work,
Dex.
Honestly.
We make a good duo.
[ Chuckles lightly ]
Rip City Dicks?
Oh.
You are
a strange...strange man.
See you around?
[ Engine starts ]
♪♪
Dongelberg.
♪♪
[ Tires screech ]
You're a friggin' maniac!
You're working for a maniac!
You bitch!
Hey!
Oh!
Oh.
What are you doing?
Calling the cops
for several attempts at murder.
No.
Stay down!
I don't know what he told you,
but Artie Banks ruined my life.
Shut up.
No, I hired him to do a job.
He got proof that my business
partner was stealing from me
and then sold him the very same
evidence I hired him to get.
It's true.
That's his game.
♪♪
[ Cellphone ringing ]
♪ I was made
for loving you, baby ♪
♪ You were made for loving me ♪
Pick up, you son of a bitch.
[ Tires squeal ]
Artie: You've reached
the A to the B.
Please leave a may-sage.
[ Beep ]
♪ You were made for loving me ♪
♪♪
This isn't right! Gah --
[ Music stops ]
You sold the tape
to Tapper?
Yep.
How much?
More than I would have got
from Candace.
Artie,
she is gonna lose her kid.
That's sad.
I really mean it.
But I'm not
in the morality business.
I'm a private investigator
for hire.
I go where the money goes.
Ugh, God,
this is so messed up.
This is so --
This is so messed up.
I told you exactly what I was
gonna do -- exploit, manipulate.
People don't change,
remember?
You took me for some doddering,
over-the-hill chump.
I played to that.
I told you
what you wanted to hear.
I'm not your daddy.
I'm not your mentor.
I'm a guy who can read people
really well.
I'm gonna report you.
You illegally bugged
a private citizen,
put a tracking device
on a car.
I didn't do those things.
You did.
I did you a favor.
You did us a favor?
You are
incredibly talented,
but there's one thing
standing in the way
of you being an exceptional
private investigator.
You care.
[ Sighs ]
One day, we're gonna run into
each other down the road
on a gig,
and you will thank me.
Bon voyage, kid.
How are you gonna look
Candace in the eye
and tell her
what you did?
I'm not.
[ Pen clicks ]
I, uh...
I never met Chaka Khan.
And I don't have a daughter.
[ Exhales sharply ]
♪♪
That's not gonna make you
feel any better.
[ Sighs ]
♪♪
Feeney. It's Grey.
Yeah,
I'm just checking in, man.
I...I want to see
if you left town
and if our friend reached out
to you again, okay?
Hit me back.
Okay, so I lied
to an off-duty cop.
You see my problem?
I've got a dead body,
you've got a history
with the victim,
you were in contact with him,
and you lied about it.
Am I a suspect?
You're the only suspect.
Well, why don't you
just ask me if I killed Feeney?
Go ahead and ask.
You don't have an alibi.
I was at the bar.
Alone.
That's not an alibi.
Well, I was there.
You're hiding something.
It's not a crime.
I don't want to stick you
with a murder
if you didn't do it,
but I will find something on you
if you don't cooperate.
[ Exhales sharply ]
It's blood from a stone,
man.
I don't know what Dex knows
about your past,
but I'm pretty sure
she wouldn't be too happy
to know she's playing house
with a potential murderer.
Man, I was wondering
if this was all about Dex.
You got it twisted if you think
that's how I go about my job.
[ Knock on door ]
[ Exhales sharply ]
♪♪
[ Door closes ]
♪♪
♪♪
You didn't murder Feeney.
[ Exhales sharply ]
My guys got CCTV feeds
from nearby.
We got you going into the bar
late that night,
getting out
early in the morning.
I got to tell you something --
uh, I also didn't
kill Biggie or Tupac.
The list goes on.
It's endless, really, of all
the people I didn't kill.
I think you do know
who killed him.
I think I'm gonna go.
I think that's my right.
So, this was fun.
I think you and Feeney
got wrapped up
in something
with your prison crew.
Feeney went left,
took a couple bullets,
now you're left
holding the bag.
I put Wallace Kane away,
you know?
I know him. Well.
Killed one of my C.I.'s
a few years back.
One of probably 50 bodies
that he dropped.
If I was under his thumb,
I'd be afraid,
whether he was
in jail or not.
I'd want help.
Protection.
And you'd be willing
to do me a solid, huh?
If you help me find
Feeney's killer.
Before he kills you.
[ Sighs ]
This offer's for right here,
right now.
Tomorrow?
I come after you.
Just do me a favor --
leave Dex out of this,
whatever it is
you think you're doing.
[ Knock on door ]
♪♪
[ Door closes ]
[ Siren wailing distantly ]
♪♪
[ Foot tapping ]
[ Sighs ]
Ah!
[ Tape deck whirs ]
[ Snap!'s "The Power" plays ]
♪♪
♪ I've got the power ♪
♪ Power ♪
♪♪
[ Engine starts ]
♪ I've got the power ♪
♪ Power ♪
[ Knock on door ]
Hey.
Um...
♪ I've got the power ♪
Today, I got beat.
I lost. We lost.
Artie sold me out,
and it [exhales sharply]
it pisses me off,
and it pisses me off
that my mistake
could cost you your child.
But they're not gonna
get away with this, okay?
No, they think
we're just gonna lie down
and we're gonna take it.
Yeah, you know,
they have the power
and they have
the influence and...
But you know what?
They're arrogant
sons of bitches,
and they don't know that women
like us have been fighting
our entire lives
for everything.
♪♪
Randall's gonna pay,
and Artie's gonna pay
for what he did.
And I...
I won't lose again.
♪ I've got the power ♪