Step by Step (1991–1998): Season 6, Episode 6 - She's the One - full transcript

You think?

Yeah. Yeah.
Al, here's your problem
right here.

What?

Car doesn't work.

It took two of you
an hour to figure that out?

Well, we didn't have
the proper tools.

Yeah, like brains.

All right, tow truck guy
should be here any minute.

All right,
when he gets here,

you chicks just let me
handle this, all right?

Cars are a guy thing.



Really?

Kinda like saying
"pull my finger,"

then laughing about it
for a half hour?

Okay, he's here.

Now remember,
you chicks keep quiet,
all right?

Let me handle this
man to man.

Hi, I'm Sam.

What seems
to be the problem?

Um...

You'll have to excuse him.

He was born
without a tongue.

Well, everything here
looks pretty darn good.

Tell me about it.

What?



I mean, the engine.

Checked it out myself.

Everything seemed
to be fully operational.

I'm gonna
try and start it.

I'm telling you
this baby's dead.

I turned the key myself.
Didn't even make a sound.

Nice diagnosis, dip stick.

Okay, all fixed.

So what was it?

The pistons,
the starter, the tranny?

You had it in reverse
instead of park.

You see, it was
a transmission problem.

Hey, it's an easy
mistake to make.

Listen, do you mind
if I use your phone?

I need to make a call
about some Packers tickets

I'm supposed to pick up.

You're a Packers fan?

What, are you kidding me?
I never miss a game.

Wow. All right,
that's really cool.

Yeah, there's a phone
in the kitchen. Help yourself.

-Thanks.
-Right through there.

My gosh, that is
the most incredible
woman I have ever met.

She's into cars,
she loves sports.

My God. If she
likes the Three Stooges,
I'm gonna marry her.

What are you
waiting for, man?

Why don't you
ask her out?

Come on.
Did you see those jeans?

They were so tight.

They were just totally
inappropriate for
the work environment.

I'm just disgusted,
quite frankly.

Thanks for the phone.

Sure. Hey, Sam, listen.

You know, I was wondering,
if you're not that busy,

and you might want to,
um, you know, maybe...

You wanna go
to the Packers game
with me tomorrow?

-Sure.
-Pick you up at six.

- Great.
- You got a name?

Yeah.

Do you wanna
tell me what it is?

Um, it's um, it's...

JT.

Um, JT. JT.
That's my name.

That's my name. JT.

["BOOT SCOOTIN' BOOGIE" PLAYING]

Yee-haw.

Yeah, buddy!

Very funny, you two.
Very funny.

You know, Frank,
I'm trying really hard

to understand
this country music,

but, I mean,
all the songs
sound the same.

It's like,

I mean,
what is that?

Is this music,
or a white trash
anxiety attack?

You know, I...

- Hi, guys.
- Hi.

-I have the greatest news.
-What?

Jimmy Ray Johnson heard me
at The Palomino tonight

and offered me a job
singing in his new video
in Chicago.

Jimmy Ray Johnson?
That's the best news
I've ever heard.

Who's Jimmy Ray Johnson?

Are you kidding, honey?

Jimmy Ray Johnson
is just about

the biggest country
music star in America.

That's right,
and he said he's gonna
make me a star too.

Karen, Karen,
before you do the video,
let me do your hair.

You know, I used to do
Dolly Parton's hair.

Wow.
You know Dolly Parton?

No,
I just did her hair.

A guy named Billy Bob
used to bring it to the salon

in the back
of a Chevy pickup.

Very nice lady.
Very nice.

-Hi.
-Hi.

-You look great.
-Yeah, so do you.

You ready to go watch
the Packers kick some butt?

Yeah,
where are we sitting?

50-yard line,
ten rows back.

Yes,
you are definitely
my kind of woman.

["POWER OF LOVE" PLAYING]

Wow, what a great carnival.

Thanks for winning all
these stuffed animals for me.

You got an arm
like a cannon.

You tighten
enough lug nuts,

you get pretty buff.

Wow. I'm dating
a Schwarzenegger.

Yeah, dispatcher truck 71.

You out there, Sam?

Sam here.
What's up, Smitty?

Yeah, I know
it's your night off,

but we got a dead battery
over on Cherokee Road.

You wanna take it?

Sorry, no can do.
I'm with my boyfriend.

Lucky guy?
I'll try Johnson.

Bye, Smitty.

You know, you didn't have
to turn down work for me.

Gee,
I was kind of hoping
the evening wasn't over.

Well, I'd invite you
to my house,

but there's, like,
ten people in there

and a crazy French dude
running around, so...

Wanna go back to my place
and listen to some music?

Wow. That'd be great, yeah.

Voila.
Chocolate souffle.

Coolio.
You made us dessert
for breakfast?

This is not dessert.

This is a hot,
nutritious meal

made from eggs, milk, wheat,

and enough sugar to give
Willy Wonka a major buzz.

Hey, guys,
has anyone seen JT?

Nope. So far it's been
a fabulous morning.

I'm kinda worried about him.

He never came home last night.

Last time I saw him
he was going out
on a date with Sam.

You don't think
he stayed out all night
with her, do you?

Man,
if Frank finds out,
he's gonna kill JT.

Ha! Let me tell him.
Let me tell him.

Now...

Now, listen, little
Melrose Place people.

We do not want
to jump to conclusions

about what JT
did or did not do, okay?

We do not have
all the facts.

I mean, all we know
is that he's a normal,
19-year-old man,

and he went out
with a beautiful woman,

and he stayed out all night.

Okay, maybe we do
have all the facts.

Morning.

JT, this man is my hero!

Damn!

You, you the man.
You the man.

You the man!
You the man!
You the man.

I'm gonna go upstairs
and get some sleep.

He's gonna go upstairs
and get some sleep.

You know what that means.

That means that he did not
get any sleep last night!

-JT, you're the man!
-Rich. Rich.

Rich, come over here.

Don't take this
the wrong way.

I mean it with love.
But you're a pig.

Now sit down and drink your...

I'll get it.

I go get the door,
I fix you breakfast.

Why don't you get me
a little black and white
outfit and a feather duster?

I'll be your little
French maid.

-Hi.
-Hello.

Whatever you're here to fix,
I'm sure glad it's broke.

I'm Sam,
JT's girlfriend.

Well, in that case,
forgive my cheesy pickup line.

Won't you come in?

I, of course,
am Jean-Luc Rieupeyroux.

Yeah, JT
talks about you
all the time.

Well, of course he does.
Won't you sit down?

I just came by
to see if he's okay.

Well, you would know more
about that than I would.

Why?

Well, I mean,
the two of you

did, you know,
spend the night together,

didn't you?

No, we didn't.

Look, you're his friend.

Maybe you can tell me
what's going on.

We had a great date last night

and we decided
to go back to my place.

And then the minute
I put my arms around him
to kiss him,

he got real nervous,
made up some excuse,
and just left.

Well, I'll be a monkey uncle.

I got to talk to that boy.

That would be great,

because I really
care about JT,

and I want
this relationship
to work out.

Okay, don't worry
about anything.

Look, you just
go home and relax.

Do you do
a hot-oil treatment?

-Yeah.
-Good.

Then do your nails,
and leave everything
to Jean-Luc Rieupeyroux.

-Really?
-Absolutely.

Because I know exactly
what's going on.

What in the name
of Jerry H. Lewis
is going on?

Hey, JT, how's it going?

It's going.

Is there,
anything on your mind?

Like what?

I don't know.
Like anything.

You know, whatever.

A movie that you've seen
or, your schoolwork

or your love life
or sports or...

Your love life?
I mean, it's whatever...

Whatever you want.

You know, you choose.

Well, there's
nothing to talk about.

I went out
on a date with Sam,

stayed out all night,
connect the dots.

Well, I just
spoke with Sam,

and,
she said that your dots
do not connect at all.

Sam was here?

JT, you know what?
You can talk to me.

And you'll feel better.

Man, I acted like such a jerk.

I spent all last night
walking around,

just trying to figure out
why I bailed on Sam.

I mean, she's perfect.

She's smart,
and she's funny,
and she's beautiful.

She's got beautiful hair
and great eyes, and...

You got to love
a woman that can handle
a torque wrench.

You know
what the weirdest part
about this whole thing is?

I'm, like,
crazy about this girl.

I've never felt this way
about anybody before.

But every time I thought
about kissing her,

I get this really weird
feeling in my stomach.

JT,
you know what it is?

You're...

You're just afraid.

Afraid of a girl?

No. No, no, no,
you're not afraid of a girl,

but you're...

You're afraid of love.

-No way.
-Ouiway.

Being in love is a very,
very scary thing,

because, you know, when you're
with a woman that you love,

it's no longer
about swapping spit.

It's about swapping hearts.

So why would I
be afraid of that?

Because to be in love

is to be totally
emotionally vulnerable.

Okay? You are with a woman,
you're going to let her
look into your eyes.

She can see your secrets.

She can see who you are.

She can see your soul.

Wow. You're right.

I gotta get out
of this relationship.

No, no, no, no.
No, hey, hey, hey.

What? You going to run away
just because you're scared?

You don't do that.

I mean,
it's like skydiving. Right?

You have to leap, okay?

And maybe
there's a small chance

that your parachute
will not open

and, you know,
you plummet
to a terrifying death

on the highway
with blood everywhere...

You're right.
I gotta get out
of this relationship.

No, no,
but the other thing...

The other thing is that
there's a better chance,

you know, that
the parachute will open
like a big, fluffy cloud,

and will rock you
gently to the Earth

where your love
is waiting for you
with open arms.

Okay, so you're saying

the reason I bailed
on Sam last night

is because I may actually
be falling in love with her?

And kissing somebody
you care about
can be a little scary?

Absolutely.

Man. Life was a lot easier
when I was just a horn dog.

I'm telling ya,
I know somebody
in the band, okay?

It's just
for security reasons.

Well, gee, honey, I...

My goodness.
Look at this.

This is where
it all happens?

Really?

Carol,
look at this guitar.

Hey.

Frank, would you
put down the guitar?

Come on,
nobody's gonna care.

Sir, put the guitar down.

I was,
just, tuning it.

Mom, Frank, I want you
to meet Jimmy Ray Johnson.

Jimmy Ray,
this is Frank
and Carol Lambert.

Hi.

Gee, we are just
so happy to meet you.

Hi.

It's so nice of you
to put Karen in your video.

I'm happy to have her.
She's got a lot of talent.

Well,
I don't wanna brag,

but I guess she kinda
gets it from me, you know?

I used to do
a little singing myself.

In fact,
if you wanted to do
a mother-daughter duet,

you know,
like The Judds, or...

Mother.

Sorry.

This is your thing.

I don't wanna
interfere or anything.

Frank and I'll just go over
here and get some coffee?

Would you like some coffee?

Mom.

Okay, everybody,
we're ready to go.

Let's try one.

Honey, I thought
you were good.

Yeah, let's do
this thing, all right?

Now, you remember, Karen,

prettier you dance,
more CDs we sell.

Just go for it,
honey, all right?

Jimmy Ray Johnson,
"Sunny Days" video take one.

Wait, wait. Stop.
Something's wrong.

Cut, cut. All right, honey,
what's the problem?

Um, I'm sorry,
but my microphone is dead.

Of course your mic
is dead, darlin'.

This is the way
we always do it.

See, you just
stand there, look sexy

and pretend to sing, okay?

Now, we'll dub in
the real singer's voice

when we get back
to Nashville.

But I'm a really good singer.

I know, I know,
you got a sweet, little voice,

but listen, on my tunes,
I only use professionals.

Now, you wanna
stay in on this video,

you just stand there
and look good, all right?

Otherwise,
you can take a walk.

But you'd be
out of a job.

You know something?

I'd rather spend
the rest of my life

singing in the shower

than be in a video with
a miserable phony like you.

Come on, Karen,
let's get out of here.

You don't need
this sleaze bag.

Yeah, you know, in the words
of a real country artist,

you can take this job
and shove it.

Well, thanks for
taking me to Maria's.

That was the best
fettuccine I've ever had.

Sure. I had to take you
somewhere special.

After all, it is our
ten-day anniversary.

Do you mind if I come in?

Sure. Yeah, come on in.

Have a seat.

Well, I guess
everybody's asleep already.

Yeah, looks like
it's just the two of us.

JT, I want you
to know I had a really
good time tonight.

Me too.

We're really great together.

Okay, JT, it's time
to take the leap.

- I can't do it.
- I'm too scared!

You must.

Come on,
it's now or never.

Okay, okay, never!

JT, you must leap now!

But I can't!
What if I get hurt?

Well, that's
a chance we all take.

Okay, come on.
Get ready to say bye-bye.

Bye-bye!

That was nice.

Yeah, it was.

["BOOT SCOOTIN' BOOGIE" PLAYING]

Yee-haw!

Yeah, ho! Frank and Carol
have left the barn.