Spy (2011–…): Season 1, Episode 1 - Codename: Loser - full transcript
Tim is in a custody battle with his ex-wife, when he quits his job. He applies for a job as a civil servant doing data entry, but discovers during the job interview that he has been offered a job as a trainee spy for MI5.
Woah!
Oh!
- Marcus!
- Did I startle you?
No, no I was, no.
How are you,
how was school?
- 'tupid.
- Right.
Hope I'm not interrupting.
No, no. I think it's just
uh, delivered by mistake.
- You know why Judith left you?
- Oh, hey now listen.
- Mommy loves you Marcus.
- I know she loves me.
We're trying to establish
why she does not love you.
Right.
- 'cos you are weak,
- Okay.
- and you are boring,
- I see
and you are lazy.
That true?
- It's not that I didn't love you,
- There you go, you see?
- I despised you.
- Oh.
You witnessed throwing her
into the arms of another man,
a man who could
properly nourish her,
both intellectually,
as well as physically.
That's exactly right.
Really don't need to hear
about Philip. No offense Philip!
Hey I don't care bud,
I ended up scoring the hottie.
Not in front of him,
you are still his headmaster
for god's sake.
So we'll see you next weekend.
Oh, but can't I just
stay with you?
It's only temporary.
Just while your mama
sorts out all the legal stuff.
Yes.
- And her pill addiction.
- Philip!
Come on, come on
say good-bye.
You take care big bear.
Don't, get off me.
Come on hey Goose,
I'm feelin'
the need for speed.
- You call me.
- No.
Okay.
Right, now the oldies
are out of our hair.
What say you and me grab
ourselves a pizza, or alone time.
Yeah, that's a good idea.
I could... do that.
Spy 01x01
Codename Loser
22 pages a minute,
pretty reasonable
ink consumption.
- And the photo quality is good?
- It's not bad.
Can I access the printer
through my phone?
Why do you want to do that for?
- I'm handling this, thanks Chris.
- Well I just thought that...
- I loath people like you.
- Chris!
Transfering your failed aspirations
onto some trendy bit of hardware
that has the processing
power to run NASA.
Chris!
But all you do is watch hilarious
clips of fat kids on rollercoasters.
Chris!
Or illegally download
the latest Girls Aloud album,
because you too embarassed
and too cheap to pay for it.
- Chris!
- And the rest of the time
you sit in front of your screen
slack-jawed,
go watching yourself on
meaningless trivalent.
Oh one day, the futility
- of your hateful existence
- Chris!
smacks you square
in your flat table face.
- I'm going to think about it.
- Alrighty.
Thanks. Do call again.
- Just for once?
- What?
Why do you stay at
Computer Galaxy?
The prestige.
- Marcus hates me.
- Marcus is a dick.
You can't say that
about my son.
Why not?
I've met him, he is.
He's nine!
I don't know why you don't just
let him live with his mom?
Believe me, Judith
is not a good mother.
Well, for what it's worth I think
Marcus is pretty hard on you.
Thanks!
I appreciate that.
So you divorce his mother,
big deal. Why not?
She was actually
the one, who...
So what if you exploited
her pill addiction
to win back custody and have her
tossed out of her own house?
Good for you.
It show you care.
That was... of course
I decided that I should...
Who honestly cares if you've been
working as a junior sales assistant
in a computer shop for
the last seven years?
Five years, actually.
Seven years actually, dude.
Seven years?
Well, no wonder
he doesn't respect me,
I'm not... going, nowhere.
- That's the problem because...
- No, I'm sorry.
I should be doing
more with my life,
than selling cheap printers
and sitting here with you
every single day,
sharing M&S meal deals.
I have a BSE from Sussex, Chris.
I have a first from Oxford,
and do you see me complaining?
- All the time.
- Exactly!
No, I'm sorry.
No.
What are you doing?
It isn't time.
I'm quiting.
- Quiting to do what?
- I don't know.
Something better with my life.
I'll see you around, Chris.
You got something on your...
Yeah.
Possiamo mangiare oggi.
- What?
- Any danger from supper?
Yes, absolutely.
Let's see what've we got.
Oh, cumin.
Forget it.
I go around to Justin's.
They're having ***
I quit my job!
You did what?
I quit my job today.
Yeah!
And what exactly we
going to do for money?
Get another job.
A better job.
Doing what?
Sudoku?
I haven't fi...
figured it out yet.
Well, take your time.
The human body can last
a good ten days
before withering to death
from malnutrition.
I'm sensing that
you know that pleased.
I know it's unfashionable
in today's socialist dystopia,
but I still regard unemployment
as a badge of failure.
No, see no, look this is
a new start for me.
*** you know?
I mean yes, things might be a
little bit difficult to begin with,
but it's a chance for us to really
come together, you know?
Be a team.
Come on,
what do you say?
- Dad?
- Yeah?
Get a bloody job.
Understood.
Good.
Have fun!
Hurray!
You have a BSE in computer science.
With Spanish.
With Spanish,
Claro que si.
What?
You've been working at
Computer Galaxy
for you think five years,
but it might be seven.
Yeah, that's right.
You like number puzzles
and strategic board games.
I do.
And you have an adorable
little son, called Marcus.
I have a son.
Alright, let's see
what we've got.
You should be doing this,
Mr. Computer.
Yeah.
No you shouldn't.
We're a government founded
organisation,
and it would be illegal if I'd
let you touch my terminal.
- Right. I didn't ask to...
- Yeah, well next time just think.
Oh, here we go.
McLaren are looking for computer
engineer for their Formula 1 team,
involves attending
all the Grands Prix,
Monaco, California, Indonesia.
Salary 58.5
That sounds great.
I can't be away that much.
Need to be with my son.
I bet he absolutely
loves being with you.
Wells... Oh, Playboy are
looking for a web technician.
That sound quite fun,
doesn't it?
Sign me up.
You have a son!
- No, but you just, you would.
- Shame on you Tim!
Okay.
Well it's gone now, so.
Oh, what about this one?
Civil service, they need
someone to imput data.
Now it's only a six month contract,
but you never know,
might get extended.
Yeah, ***
Really?
Yeah, civil service.
Why not?
Score!
Alright, now there's an
assesment day tomorrow at 12:00
so I'll just print off your forms
and you are good to go.
Alrighty.
I feel like this is going to be the
start of great things for you, Tim.
Hey!
Good jog?
Are you ready
for your interview?
Yeah, I think so.
Do you want to practice
some questions?
Nope.
I think I'm okay.
Why do you think you're
suited to this position?
- Well...
- Too slow!
On a scale of 4 to 60, do you
prefer failure or defeat?
Don't understand.
- Really?
- No.
- 47?
- What?
- No?
- No.
- Okay, pretty basic stuff.
- Yeah.
I'm pretty sure that they going
to stick to questions about my CV.
- Just the one sheet?
- Yeah.
How compact.
- Says here you're single.
- Yes.
Been single a long time?
Um, well since your mother
left me, so uh, what's that?
All about a year?
And why specifically do you think
women find you so repugnant?
Yeah, I really don't think that
they're going to ask me that.
Says here you speak
intermediate Spanish.
S?.
Cuales son las exportaciones
principales de Catalunya?
S?.
[Speaking gibberish]
Do you think you got the job?
- Nope.
- No.
You've got to pick me up
from football this afternoon.
And try not to be too late.
Probably not the best
idea for a 9-year-old
to be left alone in an
empty playing field.
Alrighty.
Unless you're trying
to get me abducted.
Is that what you want, Tim?
No.
Good luck with the interview!
Excuse me!
Um, you don't know
where room 1-5...
Okay, thanks.
You don't know if...
You don't know?
No.
Just in time.
In you pop.
Sorry!
No talking. Thank you.
Alright, you have one hour.
Begin!
Ssshh!
Sorry!
Uh, maybe just leave them?
Yes.
- Here you go.
- Oh, no. I finished.
Finished?
It's only been 17 minutes.
I can stay, it's fine.
I got things.
Sorry!
- What's your name?
- Tim Elliott.
Well done, Tim.
Well done.
Be back at 2 pm,
for the interview.
Okay.
- I'll just get it later.
- Yeah, good idea.
Good luck!
I think it went okay.
Well you'd be sure
to tell them for me,
that the civil service
is nothing but a pimp
to this fascist
puppet government,
and I count off the days till
we see their survival heads
rolling in the streets.
Yeah. Yeah,
I'll definitely do that.
- Alright, cool.
- Alrighty.
You going to need a new one.
Do you mind?
Well, I was sitting here first.
No, I meant with you.
Sit with you.
Oh, you it's alright. I thought
you meant you wanted me to...
Do you mind?
Sorry, no.
Yeah, go ahead.
We haven't met probably.
I'm Caitlin.
I'm Tim.
- Sausage?
- No, thanks.
- They're pork.
- I'm fine.
It's like ***
It says 87% meat.
You finished the test
very quickly.
There's definitely
pork in there.
I mean I found it
pretty easy as well.
And beef?
But then again my entire career
was leading up to this moment, so.
Really?
Well, I don't think
you'll get the job.
- Why? Have you heard something?
- No.
Is this part of the test?
Are you wearing a wire?
What?
No, I'm not, no.
My son just say that they
only hire ugly people
in the civil service, so
that would count you out.
Oh. Right.
- Sorry about that.
- It's fine.
God I want this job!
Sorry.
Don't worry about it.
There're lots of
other jobs out there.
There's one at Playboy right
now, if you're interested.
Excuse me?
Not as a model, you know,
just techie stuff.
Oh right.
Not that you know not
attractive enough to be a model,
because that you are, you know,
but you don't even want to, um...
What?
You know. Do all the...
- No.
- No?
- No. I mean thanks, but no thanks.
- No thanks.
Right! Yes! Yes!
I mean not even thanks, right?
Just no.
- I'm going to head back.
- Okay. Yeah.
- Good luck this afternoon!
- You too!
You sure you...?
***
Yes...
- Damn impressive exam results, Tim.
- Thank you.
Hope we not appear to
have any paperwork on you.
No, job centre should've
sent that over.
Discrete, I like that.
So, any questions for us?
Um...
Do you do dental cover?
You know, for the teeth?
He's... You are
one cool guy, Tim.
Really?
- Smoking cool.
- Okay.
But I bet you
hear that all the time.
Not as often as you think.
Tim, we err...
we'd like to offer you a job.
Wow, brilliant.
Okay, thanks!
Good.
He is one cool guy.
He's good, huh?
- And that is?
- Yeah, I know.
It's standard issue
Glock 17 I'm affraid.
But hey, you're free to
supplement it as you see fit.
Personally I prefer
these babies.
Right. Good.
- What? Everything okay?
- Yeah. Oh, yeah.
Actually one thing.
Will I be needing that a lot,
do you think?
- What's your meaning?
- For the data processing?
Not really your tea bag.
Pr... processing the data?
- Woah!
- Woah! Woah!
- Woah!
- Hey!
It's okay, nice and easy.
That's it, just slide it across.
You see that I am fully conversant
in PowerPoint and Excel,
and I do speak
intermediate Spanish.
Tim, would you just go
outside for a moment?
- Should I take?
- Not just yet.
Well, Tim.
Clearly there has been
some kind of mix-up.
Oh dear!
Now I have to inform you that
everything that you have seen today
falls strictly within
the official secrets act,
and its breach will result
in life in prisonment.
- Do you understand?
- Yes. Yes.
You have put us in a
very awkward position.
But luckily for you,
I like awkward positions.
Always have.
You read me?
- No.
- Terrific.
Now Tim, you've
demonstrated skills today
that we can definitely use.
So what do you say, pal?
You want a job?
- What? Doing what?
- What do you think?
As an agent in her majesty's
secret intelligent service.
Shut up!
No, rea...
Any questions?
- Um, what does the job involve?
- That's classified.
- Do I get to stay in London?
- Classified.
But I'd be working for you?
No, I got it!
- Classified.
- No it isn't.
- No? Okay.
- No, only kidding.
That really is classified.
I... could I think about it?
No.
Not a way around.
But Tim, if you do
accept this job,
your world will never
be the same again.
People's lives will
depend on you.
Is that fun?
Of course it is
But it's also a burden.
A burden that you cannot
share with anyone.
And I mean anyone.
Well?
What do you say?
You did well today, Caitlin.
Welcome aboard!
Lovely!
- It's so beautiful.
- What are you wearing?
I was just catching some rays.
- Have you shot it yet?
- No.
- Can we shoot it?
- No, it's really dangerous.
Oh, from so you heard?
This is ridiculus.
I went for job in IT.
How could I be
a government agent?
Yeah, I am amazed about
how you keep that a secret.
You see how bad I'm
going to be at this?
- Oh, can we shoot Marcus?
- No, it's... Marcus, damn it!
- Sorry, can I?
- Yeah.
- Don't tell anyone!
- Okay!
Hey!
Sorry!
I'm sorry, I'm sorry!
I'm so sorry!
- Are you okay?
- Mommy said you'd be late.
Yet another reason
why she loaths you.
- Is that true?
- What do you think?
Philip's never late.
Can we please
not discuss Philip?
- No offense Philip.
- Rodger that.
23 minutes late.
- Make a note, please Philip.
- Sorry muchacho!
Can we get in the car?
I'm actually quite cold.
- Good response time, Mommy.
- Won't be long now, Marcus!
Ciao bud, you call me, eh?
Stop saying that,
I will never call you!
10-4.
Ask me about the interview.
- How was the interview?
- It was good.
- Did you get the job?
- Yes I did.
And what critical function
will you be providing?
Okay, you are not
going to believe this,
but your father is going
to be responsible for...
copying spreadsheets
and imputting random data.
It must be thrilling to have
finally fulfilled your potential.
It really is.
Oh!
- Marcus!
- Did I startle you?
No, no I was, no.
How are you,
how was school?
- 'tupid.
- Right.
Hope I'm not interrupting.
No, no. I think it's just
uh, delivered by mistake.
- You know why Judith left you?
- Oh, hey now listen.
- Mommy loves you Marcus.
- I know she loves me.
We're trying to establish
why she does not love you.
Right.
- 'cos you are weak,
- Okay.
- and you are boring,
- I see
and you are lazy.
That true?
- It's not that I didn't love you,
- There you go, you see?
- I despised you.
- Oh.
You witnessed throwing her
into the arms of another man,
a man who could
properly nourish her,
both intellectually,
as well as physically.
That's exactly right.
Really don't need to hear
about Philip. No offense Philip!
Hey I don't care bud,
I ended up scoring the hottie.
Not in front of him,
you are still his headmaster
for god's sake.
So we'll see you next weekend.
Oh, but can't I just
stay with you?
It's only temporary.
Just while your mama
sorts out all the legal stuff.
Yes.
- And her pill addiction.
- Philip!
Come on, come on
say good-bye.
You take care big bear.
Don't, get off me.
Come on hey Goose,
I'm feelin'
the need for speed.
- You call me.
- No.
Okay.
Right, now the oldies
are out of our hair.
What say you and me grab
ourselves a pizza, or alone time.
Yeah, that's a good idea.
I could... do that.
Spy 01x01
Codename Loser
22 pages a minute,
pretty reasonable
ink consumption.
- And the photo quality is good?
- It's not bad.
Can I access the printer
through my phone?
Why do you want to do that for?
- I'm handling this, thanks Chris.
- Well I just thought that...
- I loath people like you.
- Chris!
Transfering your failed aspirations
onto some trendy bit of hardware
that has the processing
power to run NASA.
Chris!
But all you do is watch hilarious
clips of fat kids on rollercoasters.
Chris!
Or illegally download
the latest Girls Aloud album,
because you too embarassed
and too cheap to pay for it.
- Chris!
- And the rest of the time
you sit in front of your screen
slack-jawed,
go watching yourself on
meaningless trivalent.
Oh one day, the futility
- of your hateful existence
- Chris!
smacks you square
in your flat table face.
- I'm going to think about it.
- Alrighty.
Thanks. Do call again.
- Just for once?
- What?
Why do you stay at
Computer Galaxy?
The prestige.
- Marcus hates me.
- Marcus is a dick.
You can't say that
about my son.
Why not?
I've met him, he is.
He's nine!
I don't know why you don't just
let him live with his mom?
Believe me, Judith
is not a good mother.
Well, for what it's worth I think
Marcus is pretty hard on you.
Thanks!
I appreciate that.
So you divorce his mother,
big deal. Why not?
She was actually
the one, who...
So what if you exploited
her pill addiction
to win back custody and have her
tossed out of her own house?
Good for you.
It show you care.
That was... of course
I decided that I should...
Who honestly cares if you've been
working as a junior sales assistant
in a computer shop for
the last seven years?
Five years, actually.
Seven years actually, dude.
Seven years?
Well, no wonder
he doesn't respect me,
I'm not... going, nowhere.
- That's the problem because...
- No, I'm sorry.
I should be doing
more with my life,
than selling cheap printers
and sitting here with you
every single day,
sharing M&S meal deals.
I have a BSE from Sussex, Chris.
I have a first from Oxford,
and do you see me complaining?
- All the time.
- Exactly!
No, I'm sorry.
No.
What are you doing?
It isn't time.
I'm quiting.
- Quiting to do what?
- I don't know.
Something better with my life.
I'll see you around, Chris.
You got something on your...
Yeah.
Possiamo mangiare oggi.
- What?
- Any danger from supper?
Yes, absolutely.
Let's see what've we got.
Oh, cumin.
Forget it.
I go around to Justin's.
They're having ***
I quit my job!
You did what?
I quit my job today.
Yeah!
And what exactly we
going to do for money?
Get another job.
A better job.
Doing what?
Sudoku?
I haven't fi...
figured it out yet.
Well, take your time.
The human body can last
a good ten days
before withering to death
from malnutrition.
I'm sensing that
you know that pleased.
I know it's unfashionable
in today's socialist dystopia,
but I still regard unemployment
as a badge of failure.
No, see no, look this is
a new start for me.
*** you know?
I mean yes, things might be a
little bit difficult to begin with,
but it's a chance for us to really
come together, you know?
Be a team.
Come on,
what do you say?
- Dad?
- Yeah?
Get a bloody job.
Understood.
Good.
Have fun!
Hurray!
You have a BSE in computer science.
With Spanish.
With Spanish,
Claro que si.
What?
You've been working at
Computer Galaxy
for you think five years,
but it might be seven.
Yeah, that's right.
You like number puzzles
and strategic board games.
I do.
And you have an adorable
little son, called Marcus.
I have a son.
Alright, let's see
what we've got.
You should be doing this,
Mr. Computer.
Yeah.
No you shouldn't.
We're a government founded
organisation,
and it would be illegal if I'd
let you touch my terminal.
- Right. I didn't ask to...
- Yeah, well next time just think.
Oh, here we go.
McLaren are looking for computer
engineer for their Formula 1 team,
involves attending
all the Grands Prix,
Monaco, California, Indonesia.
Salary 58.5
That sounds great.
I can't be away that much.
Need to be with my son.
I bet he absolutely
loves being with you.
Wells... Oh, Playboy are
looking for a web technician.
That sound quite fun,
doesn't it?
Sign me up.
You have a son!
- No, but you just, you would.
- Shame on you Tim!
Okay.
Well it's gone now, so.
Oh, what about this one?
Civil service, they need
someone to imput data.
Now it's only a six month contract,
but you never know,
might get extended.
Yeah, ***
Really?
Yeah, civil service.
Why not?
Score!
Alright, now there's an
assesment day tomorrow at 12:00
so I'll just print off your forms
and you are good to go.
Alrighty.
I feel like this is going to be the
start of great things for you, Tim.
Hey!
Good jog?
Are you ready
for your interview?
Yeah, I think so.
Do you want to practice
some questions?
Nope.
I think I'm okay.
Why do you think you're
suited to this position?
- Well...
- Too slow!
On a scale of 4 to 60, do you
prefer failure or defeat?
Don't understand.
- Really?
- No.
- 47?
- What?
- No?
- No.
- Okay, pretty basic stuff.
- Yeah.
I'm pretty sure that they going
to stick to questions about my CV.
- Just the one sheet?
- Yeah.
How compact.
- Says here you're single.
- Yes.
Been single a long time?
Um, well since your mother
left me, so uh, what's that?
All about a year?
And why specifically do you think
women find you so repugnant?
Yeah, I really don't think that
they're going to ask me that.
Says here you speak
intermediate Spanish.
S?.
Cuales son las exportaciones
principales de Catalunya?
S?.
[Speaking gibberish]
Do you think you got the job?
- Nope.
- No.
You've got to pick me up
from football this afternoon.
And try not to be too late.
Probably not the best
idea for a 9-year-old
to be left alone in an
empty playing field.
Alrighty.
Unless you're trying
to get me abducted.
Is that what you want, Tim?
No.
Good luck with the interview!
Excuse me!
Um, you don't know
where room 1-5...
Okay, thanks.
You don't know if...
You don't know?
No.
Just in time.
In you pop.
Sorry!
No talking. Thank you.
Alright, you have one hour.
Begin!
Ssshh!
Sorry!
Uh, maybe just leave them?
Yes.
- Here you go.
- Oh, no. I finished.
Finished?
It's only been 17 minutes.
I can stay, it's fine.
I got things.
Sorry!
- What's your name?
- Tim Elliott.
Well done, Tim.
Well done.
Be back at 2 pm,
for the interview.
Okay.
- I'll just get it later.
- Yeah, good idea.
Good luck!
I think it went okay.
Well you'd be sure
to tell them for me,
that the civil service
is nothing but a pimp
to this fascist
puppet government,
and I count off the days till
we see their survival heads
rolling in the streets.
Yeah. Yeah,
I'll definitely do that.
- Alright, cool.
- Alrighty.
You going to need a new one.
Do you mind?
Well, I was sitting here first.
No, I meant with you.
Sit with you.
Oh, you it's alright. I thought
you meant you wanted me to...
Do you mind?
Sorry, no.
Yeah, go ahead.
We haven't met probably.
I'm Caitlin.
I'm Tim.
- Sausage?
- No, thanks.
- They're pork.
- I'm fine.
It's like ***
It says 87% meat.
You finished the test
very quickly.
There's definitely
pork in there.
I mean I found it
pretty easy as well.
And beef?
But then again my entire career
was leading up to this moment, so.
Really?
Well, I don't think
you'll get the job.
- Why? Have you heard something?
- No.
Is this part of the test?
Are you wearing a wire?
What?
No, I'm not, no.
My son just say that they
only hire ugly people
in the civil service, so
that would count you out.
Oh. Right.
- Sorry about that.
- It's fine.
God I want this job!
Sorry.
Don't worry about it.
There're lots of
other jobs out there.
There's one at Playboy right
now, if you're interested.
Excuse me?
Not as a model, you know,
just techie stuff.
Oh right.
Not that you know not
attractive enough to be a model,
because that you are, you know,
but you don't even want to, um...
What?
You know. Do all the...
- No.
- No?
- No. I mean thanks, but no thanks.
- No thanks.
Right! Yes! Yes!
I mean not even thanks, right?
Just no.
- I'm going to head back.
- Okay. Yeah.
- Good luck this afternoon!
- You too!
You sure you...?
***
Yes...
- Damn impressive exam results, Tim.
- Thank you.
Hope we not appear to
have any paperwork on you.
No, job centre should've
sent that over.
Discrete, I like that.
So, any questions for us?
Um...
Do you do dental cover?
You know, for the teeth?
He's... You are
one cool guy, Tim.
Really?
- Smoking cool.
- Okay.
But I bet you
hear that all the time.
Not as often as you think.
Tim, we err...
we'd like to offer you a job.
Wow, brilliant.
Okay, thanks!
Good.
He is one cool guy.
He's good, huh?
- And that is?
- Yeah, I know.
It's standard issue
Glock 17 I'm affraid.
But hey, you're free to
supplement it as you see fit.
Personally I prefer
these babies.
Right. Good.
- What? Everything okay?
- Yeah. Oh, yeah.
Actually one thing.
Will I be needing that a lot,
do you think?
- What's your meaning?
- For the data processing?
Not really your tea bag.
Pr... processing the data?
- Woah!
- Woah! Woah!
- Woah!
- Hey!
It's okay, nice and easy.
That's it, just slide it across.
You see that I am fully conversant
in PowerPoint and Excel,
and I do speak
intermediate Spanish.
Tim, would you just go
outside for a moment?
- Should I take?
- Not just yet.
Well, Tim.
Clearly there has been
some kind of mix-up.
Oh dear!
Now I have to inform you that
everything that you have seen today
falls strictly within
the official secrets act,
and its breach will result
in life in prisonment.
- Do you understand?
- Yes. Yes.
You have put us in a
very awkward position.
But luckily for you,
I like awkward positions.
Always have.
You read me?
- No.
- Terrific.
Now Tim, you've
demonstrated skills today
that we can definitely use.
So what do you say, pal?
You want a job?
- What? Doing what?
- What do you think?
As an agent in her majesty's
secret intelligent service.
Shut up!
No, rea...
Any questions?
- Um, what does the job involve?
- That's classified.
- Do I get to stay in London?
- Classified.
But I'd be working for you?
No, I got it!
- Classified.
- No it isn't.
- No? Okay.
- No, only kidding.
That really is classified.
I... could I think about it?
No.
Not a way around.
But Tim, if you do
accept this job,
your world will never
be the same again.
People's lives will
depend on you.
Is that fun?
Of course it is
But it's also a burden.
A burden that you cannot
share with anyone.
And I mean anyone.
Well?
What do you say?
You did well today, Caitlin.
Welcome aboard!
Lovely!
- It's so beautiful.
- What are you wearing?
I was just catching some rays.
- Have you shot it yet?
- No.
- Can we shoot it?
- No, it's really dangerous.
Oh, from so you heard?
This is ridiculus.
I went for job in IT.
How could I be
a government agent?
Yeah, I am amazed about
how you keep that a secret.
You see how bad I'm
going to be at this?
- Oh, can we shoot Marcus?
- No, it's... Marcus, damn it!
- Sorry, can I?
- Yeah.
- Don't tell anyone!
- Okay!
Hey!
Sorry!
I'm sorry, I'm sorry!
I'm so sorry!
- Are you okay?
- Mommy said you'd be late.
Yet another reason
why she loaths you.
- Is that true?
- What do you think?
Philip's never late.
Can we please
not discuss Philip?
- No offense Philip.
- Rodger that.
23 minutes late.
- Make a note, please Philip.
- Sorry muchacho!
Can we get in the car?
I'm actually quite cold.
- Good response time, Mommy.
- Won't be long now, Marcus!
Ciao bud, you call me, eh?
Stop saying that,
I will never call you!
10-4.
Ask me about the interview.
- How was the interview?
- It was good.
- Did you get the job?
- Yes I did.
And what critical function
will you be providing?
Okay, you are not
going to believe this,
but your father is going
to be responsible for...
copying spreadsheets
and imputting random data.
It must be thrilling to have
finally fulfilled your potential.
It really is.