Skins (2007–2013): Season 6, Episode 1 - Everyone - full transcript
Mini,Grace,Franky,Liv,Alo,Rich,Matty and Nick are on holiday in Morocco though the crumbling villa with no roof,water or electricity is not what they were expecting. Whilst Mini gets it together with Alo - though demanding he tells nobody about it - Franky tells Matty that she wants to end their relationship and she is easily attracted to the suave Luke,whose party they crash. She agrees to go off with him but Liv learns from a local boy that Luke is a notorious drug dealer and has planted six kilos of dope in the group's truck. Liv,Grace and Matty pursue the fleeing couple but the van crashes. Back at the college Grace is in a coma in hospital whilst Matty has run away in Morocco.
I can't see anything!
Where the fuck are we?
All right, Ginger Minge? Which way?
Yeah, I-I think this map
might be a bit shit.
This isn't a map. It's a multiple
choice test for retarded twats.
Yeah, I confuse easily.
Yeah... You find
the fucking airport Alo,
and I'll check to see
if my tits are still there.
Teamwork, right?
Yeah.
Uh, fuck! It's moving!
Oh, shit! They're all over me!
Fuck! Oh, fuck!
For fuck's sake.
Oh, my God - get them off me!
Chill out! What the fuck's
going on, OK? Stop moving,
stop moving OK, OK, OK?
Get it!
I think it's in here.
Just stop moving, let me check.
Say it.
Follow that plane!
Oh, fuck! You tossers!
Bonjour monsieur.
Everyone seems friendly.
Honestly Rich, do you have to wear
your cousin's hand-me-downs?
Look, I'm not gonna buy clothes
I'm not gonna wear again.
Your cousin's gay, right?
Rufus? No!
He's just imaginative.
Right.
Look, you don't get heavy metal
beachwear. It's just not our scene.
What was that for?
Just don't change.
OK.
Where the fuck is everyone!?
What did he say?
He likes your shorts.
Ah...
Whoo!
They are great big gays, yes?
Richy Roo! Richy Roo!
Yes.
Gracie!
Hey, black bitch.
Hey, white bitch.
Hey, silly bitch.
Holiday!
All right, we're gonna piss
on Rider in his sleep!
Why?
His Dad's Villa's not finished.
Hang on, he said it was a luxury pad.
Rider's gotta turn the water on, man.
Yeah, the pool's a bit
more of a barbecue pit.
Shit! We paid!
Chill out, man.
He promised - it's gonna be full
by the time we get back.
Whoo!
And we found three ounces of ganja
underneath the kitchen floor!
Holiday!
Morocco! Whoooaahhhh!
Whoooah!
Here it is, guys - Chateau Rider.
I don't know why you had to bring
so much stuff.
I don't know how people dress here.
I need options.
Now, about the bedrooms...
It was all decided democratically.
Yeah? How?
Mini chose her room
and then we all drew lots...
and...
Well, you weren't here.
Right. It's not that bad...
What's the problem?
You've got the penthouse. Sorry,
mate, but we got you a mattress.
Yay!
For fuck's sake!
It doesn't even have a roof.
Shouldn't turn up late for holidays,
should you?
Cheer up, mate, all right?
We'll go for a dip.
Rider's been turning the water on...
I'll tell you what, mate -
it's fuckin' A...
Last one in the pool's a pussy!
It is a lovely pool.
Here we goooooo!
Aargh!
Aargh!
I don't think Rider
put the water on yet.
For fuck's sake, Rider,
you useless bastard!
Mate. You're making a lot of noise.
Get up here.
I'm getting stoned
like a whore in a burqa.
I think that might be a little bit
racist, mate.
Racist? Or is it Ace-ist?
Oi! Rider!
You said the fucking pool would be
filled up by the time we got back.
You went already?
Put the water on, Rider.
Otherwise I'll have to mess you up.
Really? Any time!
Cos I haven't had
a shower in 43 hours...
You smell like muff.
But you know, I dig that in a lady.
Let's McMake out, lassie...
This is your fault!
He's your friend!
I fucking hate him. Don't I, Rider?
You love me, you homosexual.
You all love me
and you're all homosexuals,
especially the women, hopefully...
Ah!
OK... Let's get fucked.
{pub}Woo-hoo-hoo!
I'm going to see if I
can find some more drugs.
Yeah go for it man.
Oh, just shut up and leave me alone.
I'm sorry about the fucking map. OK?
I don't care. I don't care.
Oh, for crying out loud!
Oh, come on, Franky!
You just fucking sit there you
don't you, you twat!
I was just saying that the...
You go on and on like...
OK, OK.
I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
I was trying to pass the time.
I thought you liked
Simone De Beauvoir...
Screw you! You mind fuck!
Franky.
Matty.
Hi.
How was Tunisia?
Yeah, it's... it's a long way,
that's all.
Hey.
Hey.
Been busy losing your virginity then?
Yeah, yeah a lot.
Ah, I missed you guys.
Sure, honey.
Hey, crazy bitch, we want a snog too.
No offence, Franks.
You ming like muff plus!
Oh, I'm sorry. Where's the shower?
Ooh, it feels good. It feels good.
On the chest, yeah?
Yeah, yeah, good. Oh, Yeah!
Nearly, nearly, nearly.
I'm clean! I'm clean!
How's the washing up liquid?
It's mad! It's like lemony zest!
Honestly my balls are
so tingly right now... Woo-hoo!
Shit!
Um, ladies you're in the locker room.
Yeah, just checking you stick
to the water ration.
One bottle per person.
Because I need to detox.
Yo, Nicky, Tiny Tits wants a shower.
What did you call me?
Nothing.
Franky wanted to talk to Matty.
Yeah?
Er, Matty, I'm sorry.
I got cross.
That's all right,
I know I go on about...
Yeah. You know,
I don't even like Morrissey.
And you just kept saying
the lyrics and farting
and, you know, it's
really irritating but, er...
But, you know, it doesn't matter.
We're here now,
we've made it to Morocco
and we can talk to other people,
you know other than each other...
Cool.
Yeah.
Sorted! Now girls got to freshen up.
Oh, if I catch anyone checking out
fanny festival,
I'll be taking your lemony balls
for a long walk.
OK?
Yeah, sure cool...
Right!
See ya!
I mean, what the fuck!?
We paid for a room.
We all paid!
Rich, leave it.
For fuck's sake!
There's no roof, there's no water.
There's no electricity.
How are we going to see or wash
or flush the fucking toilet?
Come on, Rich...
Or listen to my new Slayer album?
Rich! Do you like this?
A holiday's like a box
of chocolates, Richard.
You never know what you're
going to get.
You're the most beautiful
woman I've ever seen.
Got ya. Ha!
♪ Shades of wine love keeps
dancing through my mind... ♪
And I sing.
Not that metal shit either.
Nu-huh!
♪ No, I can't escape this time
all because of you... ♪
♪ Yesterday, love was
just a word to say
♪ Overnight a holiday
All because of you... ♪
♪ So unreal, life was just a... ♪
♪ A ferris wheel... ♪ What was that?
It sounds like a party.
Come on, Alo.
Use your massive nostrils
to sniff it!
Yes, it's down here.
Keep running ginger boy.
Where's he going?
Wait! Wait!
Alo.
Ooo! Ooo!
Follow him, follow him, follow him.
Where the fuck's he gone?
Wait, I've found it.
Yes! All right! Whoooo!
Guys, it's here, it's down here!
Let's crash it man.
Silly French left the top...
Er excuse me, you speak English,
right?
Thank god cos we're lost.
Fucking idiot!
I'm sorry
I talk too much about stuff.
It's OK, Matty. It's fine.
We were having a fucking classic
summer holiday.
I know.
So what's going on?
Do we have to do this?
What? It's us. We're great together.
Is this what it's like,
being with someone?
You loved it.
Tunisia, the beach.
Making love to me.
It gets boring, Matty.
All the fucking and the talking.
And... and just all the stuff. OK?
That's not fair.
What's fair got to do with it?
Hey there.
I'm sorry. I was just
looking for somewhere a bit quiet.
That's cool... It's never
that quiet when we're here.
We?
My mates, we like a good time.
I should go find my boyfriend.
OK. Boyfriend, sure...
Where are you staying?
In the villa over the hill.
It's a bit of a wreck.
Really?
Yeah, it's a bit shit.
It's been empty for a while.
Tell me something I don't know,
weird girl.
That's hard. You seem so wise.
OK. Then I suggest
we dance our fucking dicks off.
{pub}Stop it.
Stupid fucking men!
Hey.
What are you doing, Farmboy?
Um... Well...
I suppose I was seeing
if my porn app will download
onto this iPhone that I nicked.
And you have no particular
level of shame about that?
Er, no, I always steal from people
who make me feel inferior.
Like who?
Well, pretty much anyone,
er, especially if they're rich,
good looking
and having a lot of sex.
And that evens it out, huh?
Yeah, you should try it sometime.
Why don't you just try
having some sex.
Yeah, don't be stupid.
Who'd want to have sex with...
Whoa, hang on.
If you tell a soul,
I'll fucking kill you, all right?
Stop pinching yourself. You're awake
and it's time this ship set sail.
I'm awake. I'm awake.
I'm awake. I'm awake.
I'm awake. I'm awake.
Oh, my God.
You've got to be fucking kidding.
This is the only room I've ever had
where you have to wear sun block.
It's heavenly.
Yes, heavenly.
If I die tomorrow, then I'd go happy.
What about me.
I wouldn't be happy.
Oh, yeah.
Well, I'd just come back
and do knob jokes to cheer you up.
I'd like that.
Your knob's always
been a bit of a joke.
It has.
But, usually,
it's ready for a bit of stand-up.
Nice.
Nice.
Rich?
My love?
As long as you're here,
you may as well know...
I've had a number of orgasms today
and right now I'm completely happy.
Don't knock it, kid.
I had to drive
your truck back, last night.
Yeah, cheers. I walked.
By yourself? What's going on, bro?
She was so into it in Tunisia
but then after a while...
I think maybe she can't do it.
Do what?
Be with someone.
Mate, sort it out.
Where did you get to... last night?
Nowhere.
Yeah?
Nothing happened.
He drove me home, that's all.
Oh, the relief!
You should sort things out
with Matthew.
Yeah? Why?
Well, because he's your boyfriend
and, well, last night
you were acting like...
a bit of a slut.
Is that what's life's all about then?
Not upsetting our boyfriends?
Fuck sakes!
I liked her better when she might
or might not have been a lesbian.
Yep.
Oh, yeah. Right on cue.
Fucking hate this wanker.
Yeah, I'd still shag him though.
You're such a massive slut.
Hi, kids.
Uh, hi, older dude.
Yeah, we just wanted to drop over.
Yeah, friendly, y'know.
Anyway, we had a kicking time
last night, right?
Did he just say kicking?
Yeah, yeah, Jakey's retro.
Anyway, thing is,
it's a bit embarrassing
but you guys have got something
that belongs to us.
What?
This. We thought the place
was empty and we stashed it here.
Finders keepers?
I'm sorry. It's just,
we owe a little cash on it.
Well, take it and fuck off then.
I tell you what, how about we chuck
in some eighths to say sorry?
Yeah, or you could
chuck in some ounces.
I mean, we do a lot of spliff.
Yeah, yeah, sure, man.
And come to the beach party today.
VIP list. We're sorted for E's.
What do you say?
What, they've still got E's here?
Fuck, that is retro.
Jake's DJ-ing.
I'm fucking hot. Believe it.
Yeah, pretty good.
Not as good as this.
Oh, my God, what wankers!
Let's get leathered!
Hey! How are you?
Good. Great. Fabulous!
Come and dance with us.
Ah... My friends.
They will tell tales on me.
Why?
I'm a God-fearing boy.
Yeah, yeah, it ain't cool.
You're thinking...
Why is life so fucking predictable?
You're 17.
I'm 18, actually.
You're 18, you've got to
go back to school,
go back to your mum and dad.
Not exactly.
It's all inevitable.
It's all going to go down.
And?
You don't owe anybody anything.
You owe nothing.
Come with me.
Where?
Anywhere. Until we get bored.
Then... whatever.
This...
is real life.
This is it.
And we go right now?
Right now.
Whoa!
Oh, uh... yeah. It's me, Farmboy.
Coincidence?
Unhappily. No.
Er, I just came to reiterate
what will happen to you
if you mention that...
I banged your brains out.
No, you didn't.
- I fucking did.
- It's never happening again.
Why not?
Well, because... Because...
Well, basically
you're not worthy of me. OK?
Don't you like having
your brains banged out?
No-one can know, Farmboy.
Oh! Ah!
Oi.
What?
Nothing. Nothing much.
So...?
We want a favour.
We?
Yeah. Yeah, Luke and me.
We'd like a favour.
Why should I do anything for him?
Because, er... the girl.
You've been fucking her.
And now Luke's going to fuck her.
Oh, piss off!
Sit down.
Nah. Why should I?
Well, mainly because
I strapped about six kilos of dope
into the bottom of your truck.
Not that you'll find it.
You what?!
You want the girl back?
S'easy. You drive your truck
into Marrakesh for us.
Boom. Luke leaves her alone.
Everyone's lovely again.
There's an address there.
You're fucking kidding me.
It's 300km away.
The roads are quiet.
No cops about at this time. Safe.
What if I said fuck you?
I ring them. You know, whatever it
is, www.moroccancrimestoppers.
Tell them you got a load of gear
strapped into your...
I think you should get going.
When I am lawyer, perhaps
I will come to London and marry you.
Hey. Hey.
Cut the plausible Arab malarkey.
That's what I have to be careful of.
English girls.
Everyone should be.
You must take care too.
Why?
There's this guy who hides
drugs in holiday houses.
Yeah? Who?
You found drugs, yes?
He is bad. Very bad.
English boy. His name is Luke.
Very bad.
You must not know him.
Shit!
What about my things?
What about them?
Hey. I want to talk to you.
Grace. Not now.
You're not handling
the Franky thing...
Leave me alone, OK! She's gone.
What?
Hey. Hey! Stop them!
Matt, you pussy, stop them!
What? Liv!
Drive, for fuck's sake!
Come on, Matty!
- What's going on?
- That new guy's dangerous.
Do you always drive too fast?
Don't pretend you don't love it.
What are you doing?
Come on, fucking thing!
They went that way.
There they are.
Stop the car! Stop it.
This is it, kid.
This is it!
Just fucking stop them!
For fuck's sakes, slow down!
Just stop the car, please!
Please slow down!
For God's sake, Matty, hurry up!
Four Seasons - Winter by Vivaldi
Thank you, Marvellous Marimbas.
I'd like to think Vivaldi
would've been stoked
had he been able to hear that.
Well done, the Little Glocks,
as well.
Right, we can have some lunch.
Excuse me, kids.
Can we have some quiet, please?
Yes... simmer down, look you!
Thank you.
I have a letter here
from the Principal, Professor Blood.
I hope you'll let me read it.
Dear Pupils,
I want to thank you for the concern
you have shown,
to my daughter Grace and to me
and my wife in the last three weeks.
You will have heard
that Grace is still not well
and this is going to take some time.
Obviously, we are very concerned,
but I would ask that,
for the present,
you do not visit the hospital.
I will let you know
if the situation changes,
and thanks, everyone, again
for their concern.
Professor David Blood.
There it is. I'm sure
we would all like to...
yes...
... give Gracey... a great big...
... Oggy Oggy.
Right, you heard the Acting
Principal. Oggy Oggy Oggy!
Oi Oi Oi!
Oggy! Oi!
Oggy! Oi!
Oggy Oggy Oggy!
Oi Oi Oi!
{pub}So... you understand this,
right, Nick?
Yes.
If your brother contacts you,
you come and see me
and I'll call the police for you,
cos I'm your Responsible Adult.
Well, obviously
I have my moments, but...
He hasn't called me.
They found a lot of drugs
hidden in his car.
Like dope, kuh-tah-mine...
You know how...
people get a bit upset.
It wasn't Matty's.
And your brother ran away
from the accident...
I know, Jose!
If he rings, right...
I mean - you would tell me
if he rang you, wouldn't you?
To be honest, Josie,
I wouldn't fucking tell you.
Right... Right. Right.
You want to go for a few drinks?
You're a Responsible Adult, Jose.
Responsible fanny fucker!
♪ Oh, Lord, a distant beam of light
♪ The jab of neon
floods my weary eyes... ♪
Hey.
Hey.
Right, erm... you OK?
Not really.
No.
She's going to be all right,
you know.
Yeah... I know, she'll be fine.
Why did he run like that?
The stuff in his car, I... suppose.
I guess he'll explain it.
I guess he...
got a bit obsessed with Franky.
Yeah.
I... kind of wonder how that feels.
Weird, I suppose.
Um... this probably sounds
a bit fucked coming from me
but, erm...
if I could help you with anything...
I would, Nick.
Tell me why he doesn't ring.
Because he loves her.
♪ Gonna drive you away from
the trampling of bustling feet
♪ You can lose your troubled
thoughts for tonight at least
♪ I surrender myself to
your presence and peace of mind
♪ Your eyes are wider
than before... ♪
♪ So little has changed,
but your eyes now see much more
♪ So much more
♪ So...
♪ So much more
♪ So much more
♪ So... ♪
Yes?
Erm...
I'm Grace's boyfriend...
Rich. Richard.
Oh...
- How can I help you, Richard?
- Right... The thing is,
Grace couldn't complete...
... couldn't finish
her music coursework, so, erm...
Grace was very talented.
Is.
She is very talented.
Yes, but, er...
So that's why I've finished off
her music coursework for her.
She's already done the vocals,
er, me and my mate, we've put some...
I'm sorry, it's for Grace
to pass it when she's ready.
She just needs the grade.
I'm sorry, Richard.
Grace has to do it.
This is no good.
Five minutes, nobody will know.
What harm can it do?
That's not the point.
So, what is the point?
Can you tell me that?
Don't go aggro on me, Richard.
Her father says no.
I have to give her something.
I'll give it to her.
You go home
and wait for her to ring you. OK?
Here...
Tell her I did my best,
and tell her that Alo helped me
cos he does computer shit
on his PlayStation.
All right.
And tell her that you're a mean old
cow who probably never gets laid.
I will.
I gotta say - that boyfriend
of yours is super nice.
You totally lucked out,
did you not, Gracey?
He says his mate helped him with it.
Whatever
I guess we'll listen, beautiful.
♪ Shades of wine
♪ Love keeps dancing through my mind
♪ No, I can't escape this time
♪ All because of you
♪ Yesterday,
love was just a word to say
♪ Overnight a holiday
♪ All because of you
♪ So unreal,
life was just a Ferris wheel
♪ Till you told me how to feel
♪ Things I never knew... ♪
Grace? It's me again.
Can you just wake up?
Where is she, then? Zurich.
Go and find her.
You awful, awful bastards!
You're a fucking joke.
What the fuck
has happened to us all?
Where the fuck are we?
All right, Ginger Minge? Which way?
Yeah, I-I think this map
might be a bit shit.
This isn't a map. It's a multiple
choice test for retarded twats.
Yeah, I confuse easily.
Yeah... You find
the fucking airport Alo,
and I'll check to see
if my tits are still there.
Teamwork, right?
Yeah.
Uh, fuck! It's moving!
Oh, shit! They're all over me!
Fuck! Oh, fuck!
For fuck's sake.
Oh, my God - get them off me!
Chill out! What the fuck's
going on, OK? Stop moving,
stop moving OK, OK, OK?
Get it!
I think it's in here.
Just stop moving, let me check.
Say it.
Follow that plane!
Oh, fuck! You tossers!
Bonjour monsieur.
Everyone seems friendly.
Honestly Rich, do you have to wear
your cousin's hand-me-downs?
Look, I'm not gonna buy clothes
I'm not gonna wear again.
Your cousin's gay, right?
Rufus? No!
He's just imaginative.
Right.
Look, you don't get heavy metal
beachwear. It's just not our scene.
What was that for?
Just don't change.
OK.
Where the fuck is everyone!?
What did he say?
He likes your shorts.
Ah...
Whoo!
They are great big gays, yes?
Richy Roo! Richy Roo!
Yes.
Gracie!
Hey, black bitch.
Hey, white bitch.
Hey, silly bitch.
Holiday!
All right, we're gonna piss
on Rider in his sleep!
Why?
His Dad's Villa's not finished.
Hang on, he said it was a luxury pad.
Rider's gotta turn the water on, man.
Yeah, the pool's a bit
more of a barbecue pit.
Shit! We paid!
Chill out, man.
He promised - it's gonna be full
by the time we get back.
Whoo!
And we found three ounces of ganja
underneath the kitchen floor!
Holiday!
Morocco! Whoooaahhhh!
Whoooah!
Here it is, guys - Chateau Rider.
I don't know why you had to bring
so much stuff.
I don't know how people dress here.
I need options.
Now, about the bedrooms...
It was all decided democratically.
Yeah? How?
Mini chose her room
and then we all drew lots...
and...
Well, you weren't here.
Right. It's not that bad...
What's the problem?
You've got the penthouse. Sorry,
mate, but we got you a mattress.
Yay!
For fuck's sake!
It doesn't even have a roof.
Shouldn't turn up late for holidays,
should you?
Cheer up, mate, all right?
We'll go for a dip.
Rider's been turning the water on...
I'll tell you what, mate -
it's fuckin' A...
Last one in the pool's a pussy!
It is a lovely pool.
Here we goooooo!
Aargh!
Aargh!
I don't think Rider
put the water on yet.
For fuck's sake, Rider,
you useless bastard!
Mate. You're making a lot of noise.
Get up here.
I'm getting stoned
like a whore in a burqa.
I think that might be a little bit
racist, mate.
Racist? Or is it Ace-ist?
Oi! Rider!
You said the fucking pool would be
filled up by the time we got back.
You went already?
Put the water on, Rider.
Otherwise I'll have to mess you up.
Really? Any time!
Cos I haven't had
a shower in 43 hours...
You smell like muff.
But you know, I dig that in a lady.
Let's McMake out, lassie...
This is your fault!
He's your friend!
I fucking hate him. Don't I, Rider?
You love me, you homosexual.
You all love me
and you're all homosexuals,
especially the women, hopefully...
Ah!
OK... Let's get fucked.
{pub}Woo-hoo-hoo!
I'm going to see if I
can find some more drugs.
Yeah go for it man.
Oh, just shut up and leave me alone.
I'm sorry about the fucking map. OK?
I don't care. I don't care.
Oh, for crying out loud!
Oh, come on, Franky!
You just fucking sit there you
don't you, you twat!
I was just saying that the...
You go on and on like...
OK, OK.
I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
I was trying to pass the time.
I thought you liked
Simone De Beauvoir...
Screw you! You mind fuck!
Franky.
Matty.
Hi.
How was Tunisia?
Yeah, it's... it's a long way,
that's all.
Hey.
Hey.
Been busy losing your virginity then?
Yeah, yeah a lot.
Ah, I missed you guys.
Sure, honey.
Hey, crazy bitch, we want a snog too.
No offence, Franks.
You ming like muff plus!
Oh, I'm sorry. Where's the shower?
Ooh, it feels good. It feels good.
On the chest, yeah?
Yeah, yeah, good. Oh, Yeah!
Nearly, nearly, nearly.
I'm clean! I'm clean!
How's the washing up liquid?
It's mad! It's like lemony zest!
Honestly my balls are
so tingly right now... Woo-hoo!
Shit!
Um, ladies you're in the locker room.
Yeah, just checking you stick
to the water ration.
One bottle per person.
Because I need to detox.
Yo, Nicky, Tiny Tits wants a shower.
What did you call me?
Nothing.
Franky wanted to talk to Matty.
Yeah?
Er, Matty, I'm sorry.
I got cross.
That's all right,
I know I go on about...
Yeah. You know,
I don't even like Morrissey.
And you just kept saying
the lyrics and farting
and, you know, it's
really irritating but, er...
But, you know, it doesn't matter.
We're here now,
we've made it to Morocco
and we can talk to other people,
you know other than each other...
Cool.
Yeah.
Sorted! Now girls got to freshen up.
Oh, if I catch anyone checking out
fanny festival,
I'll be taking your lemony balls
for a long walk.
OK?
Yeah, sure cool...
Right!
See ya!
I mean, what the fuck!?
We paid for a room.
We all paid!
Rich, leave it.
For fuck's sake!
There's no roof, there's no water.
There's no electricity.
How are we going to see or wash
or flush the fucking toilet?
Come on, Rich...
Or listen to my new Slayer album?
Rich! Do you like this?
A holiday's like a box
of chocolates, Richard.
You never know what you're
going to get.
You're the most beautiful
woman I've ever seen.
Got ya. Ha!
♪ Shades of wine love keeps
dancing through my mind... ♪
And I sing.
Not that metal shit either.
Nu-huh!
♪ No, I can't escape this time
all because of you... ♪
♪ Yesterday, love was
just a word to say
♪ Overnight a holiday
All because of you... ♪
♪ So unreal, life was just a... ♪
♪ A ferris wheel... ♪ What was that?
It sounds like a party.
Come on, Alo.
Use your massive nostrils
to sniff it!
Yes, it's down here.
Keep running ginger boy.
Where's he going?
Wait! Wait!
Alo.
Ooo! Ooo!
Follow him, follow him, follow him.
Where the fuck's he gone?
Wait, I've found it.
Yes! All right! Whoooo!
Guys, it's here, it's down here!
Let's crash it man.
Silly French left the top...
Er excuse me, you speak English,
right?
Thank god cos we're lost.
Fucking idiot!
I'm sorry
I talk too much about stuff.
It's OK, Matty. It's fine.
We were having a fucking classic
summer holiday.
I know.
So what's going on?
Do we have to do this?
What? It's us. We're great together.
Is this what it's like,
being with someone?
You loved it.
Tunisia, the beach.
Making love to me.
It gets boring, Matty.
All the fucking and the talking.
And... and just all the stuff. OK?
That's not fair.
What's fair got to do with it?
Hey there.
I'm sorry. I was just
looking for somewhere a bit quiet.
That's cool... It's never
that quiet when we're here.
We?
My mates, we like a good time.
I should go find my boyfriend.
OK. Boyfriend, sure...
Where are you staying?
In the villa over the hill.
It's a bit of a wreck.
Really?
Yeah, it's a bit shit.
It's been empty for a while.
Tell me something I don't know,
weird girl.
That's hard. You seem so wise.
OK. Then I suggest
we dance our fucking dicks off.
{pub}Stop it.
Stupid fucking men!
Hey.
What are you doing, Farmboy?
Um... Well...
I suppose I was seeing
if my porn app will download
onto this iPhone that I nicked.
And you have no particular
level of shame about that?
Er, no, I always steal from people
who make me feel inferior.
Like who?
Well, pretty much anyone,
er, especially if they're rich,
good looking
and having a lot of sex.
And that evens it out, huh?
Yeah, you should try it sometime.
Why don't you just try
having some sex.
Yeah, don't be stupid.
Who'd want to have sex with...
Whoa, hang on.
If you tell a soul,
I'll fucking kill you, all right?
Stop pinching yourself. You're awake
and it's time this ship set sail.
I'm awake. I'm awake.
I'm awake. I'm awake.
I'm awake. I'm awake.
Oh, my God.
You've got to be fucking kidding.
This is the only room I've ever had
where you have to wear sun block.
It's heavenly.
Yes, heavenly.
If I die tomorrow, then I'd go happy.
What about me.
I wouldn't be happy.
Oh, yeah.
Well, I'd just come back
and do knob jokes to cheer you up.
I'd like that.
Your knob's always
been a bit of a joke.
It has.
But, usually,
it's ready for a bit of stand-up.
Nice.
Nice.
Rich?
My love?
As long as you're here,
you may as well know...
I've had a number of orgasms today
and right now I'm completely happy.
Don't knock it, kid.
I had to drive
your truck back, last night.
Yeah, cheers. I walked.
By yourself? What's going on, bro?
She was so into it in Tunisia
but then after a while...
I think maybe she can't do it.
Do what?
Be with someone.
Mate, sort it out.
Where did you get to... last night?
Nowhere.
Yeah?
Nothing happened.
He drove me home, that's all.
Oh, the relief!
You should sort things out
with Matthew.
Yeah? Why?
Well, because he's your boyfriend
and, well, last night
you were acting like...
a bit of a slut.
Is that what's life's all about then?
Not upsetting our boyfriends?
Fuck sakes!
I liked her better when she might
or might not have been a lesbian.
Yep.
Oh, yeah. Right on cue.
Fucking hate this wanker.
Yeah, I'd still shag him though.
You're such a massive slut.
Hi, kids.
Uh, hi, older dude.
Yeah, we just wanted to drop over.
Yeah, friendly, y'know.
Anyway, we had a kicking time
last night, right?
Did he just say kicking?
Yeah, yeah, Jakey's retro.
Anyway, thing is,
it's a bit embarrassing
but you guys have got something
that belongs to us.
What?
This. We thought the place
was empty and we stashed it here.
Finders keepers?
I'm sorry. It's just,
we owe a little cash on it.
Well, take it and fuck off then.
I tell you what, how about we chuck
in some eighths to say sorry?
Yeah, or you could
chuck in some ounces.
I mean, we do a lot of spliff.
Yeah, yeah, sure, man.
And come to the beach party today.
VIP list. We're sorted for E's.
What do you say?
What, they've still got E's here?
Fuck, that is retro.
Jake's DJ-ing.
I'm fucking hot. Believe it.
Yeah, pretty good.
Not as good as this.
Oh, my God, what wankers!
Let's get leathered!
Hey! How are you?
Good. Great. Fabulous!
Come and dance with us.
Ah... My friends.
They will tell tales on me.
Why?
I'm a God-fearing boy.
Yeah, yeah, it ain't cool.
You're thinking...
Why is life so fucking predictable?
You're 17.
I'm 18, actually.
You're 18, you've got to
go back to school,
go back to your mum and dad.
Not exactly.
It's all inevitable.
It's all going to go down.
And?
You don't owe anybody anything.
You owe nothing.
Come with me.
Where?
Anywhere. Until we get bored.
Then... whatever.
This...
is real life.
This is it.
And we go right now?
Right now.
Whoa!
Oh, uh... yeah. It's me, Farmboy.
Coincidence?
Unhappily. No.
Er, I just came to reiterate
what will happen to you
if you mention that...
I banged your brains out.
No, you didn't.
- I fucking did.
- It's never happening again.
Why not?
Well, because... Because...
Well, basically
you're not worthy of me. OK?
Don't you like having
your brains banged out?
No-one can know, Farmboy.
Oh! Ah!
Oi.
What?
Nothing. Nothing much.
So...?
We want a favour.
We?
Yeah. Yeah, Luke and me.
We'd like a favour.
Why should I do anything for him?
Because, er... the girl.
You've been fucking her.
And now Luke's going to fuck her.
Oh, piss off!
Sit down.
Nah. Why should I?
Well, mainly because
I strapped about six kilos of dope
into the bottom of your truck.
Not that you'll find it.
You what?!
You want the girl back?
S'easy. You drive your truck
into Marrakesh for us.
Boom. Luke leaves her alone.
Everyone's lovely again.
There's an address there.
You're fucking kidding me.
It's 300km away.
The roads are quiet.
No cops about at this time. Safe.
What if I said fuck you?
I ring them. You know, whatever it
is, www.moroccancrimestoppers.
Tell them you got a load of gear
strapped into your...
I think you should get going.
When I am lawyer, perhaps
I will come to London and marry you.
Hey. Hey.
Cut the plausible Arab malarkey.
That's what I have to be careful of.
English girls.
Everyone should be.
You must take care too.
Why?
There's this guy who hides
drugs in holiday houses.
Yeah? Who?
You found drugs, yes?
He is bad. Very bad.
English boy. His name is Luke.
Very bad.
You must not know him.
Shit!
What about my things?
What about them?
Hey. I want to talk to you.
Grace. Not now.
You're not handling
the Franky thing...
Leave me alone, OK! She's gone.
What?
Hey. Hey! Stop them!
Matt, you pussy, stop them!
What? Liv!
Drive, for fuck's sake!
Come on, Matty!
- What's going on?
- That new guy's dangerous.
Do you always drive too fast?
Don't pretend you don't love it.
What are you doing?
Come on, fucking thing!
They went that way.
There they are.
Stop the car! Stop it.
This is it, kid.
This is it!
Just fucking stop them!
For fuck's sakes, slow down!
Just stop the car, please!
Please slow down!
For God's sake, Matty, hurry up!
Four Seasons - Winter by Vivaldi
Thank you, Marvellous Marimbas.
I'd like to think Vivaldi
would've been stoked
had he been able to hear that.
Well done, the Little Glocks,
as well.
Right, we can have some lunch.
Excuse me, kids.
Can we have some quiet, please?
Yes... simmer down, look you!
Thank you.
I have a letter here
from the Principal, Professor Blood.
I hope you'll let me read it.
Dear Pupils,
I want to thank you for the concern
you have shown,
to my daughter Grace and to me
and my wife in the last three weeks.
You will have heard
that Grace is still not well
and this is going to take some time.
Obviously, we are very concerned,
but I would ask that,
for the present,
you do not visit the hospital.
I will let you know
if the situation changes,
and thanks, everyone, again
for their concern.
Professor David Blood.
There it is. I'm sure
we would all like to...
yes...
... give Gracey... a great big...
... Oggy Oggy.
Right, you heard the Acting
Principal. Oggy Oggy Oggy!
Oi Oi Oi!
Oggy! Oi!
Oggy! Oi!
Oggy Oggy Oggy!
Oi Oi Oi!
{pub}So... you understand this,
right, Nick?
Yes.
If your brother contacts you,
you come and see me
and I'll call the police for you,
cos I'm your Responsible Adult.
Well, obviously
I have my moments, but...
He hasn't called me.
They found a lot of drugs
hidden in his car.
Like dope, kuh-tah-mine...
You know how...
people get a bit upset.
It wasn't Matty's.
And your brother ran away
from the accident...
I know, Jose!
If he rings, right...
I mean - you would tell me
if he rang you, wouldn't you?
To be honest, Josie,
I wouldn't fucking tell you.
Right... Right. Right.
You want to go for a few drinks?
You're a Responsible Adult, Jose.
Responsible fanny fucker!
♪ Oh, Lord, a distant beam of light
♪ The jab of neon
floods my weary eyes... ♪
Hey.
Hey.
Right, erm... you OK?
Not really.
No.
She's going to be all right,
you know.
Yeah... I know, she'll be fine.
Why did he run like that?
The stuff in his car, I... suppose.
I guess he'll explain it.
I guess he...
got a bit obsessed with Franky.
Yeah.
I... kind of wonder how that feels.
Weird, I suppose.
Um... this probably sounds
a bit fucked coming from me
but, erm...
if I could help you with anything...
I would, Nick.
Tell me why he doesn't ring.
Because he loves her.
♪ Gonna drive you away from
the trampling of bustling feet
♪ You can lose your troubled
thoughts for tonight at least
♪ I surrender myself to
your presence and peace of mind
♪ Your eyes are wider
than before... ♪
♪ So little has changed,
but your eyes now see much more
♪ So much more
♪ So...
♪ So much more
♪ So much more
♪ So... ♪
Yes?
Erm...
I'm Grace's boyfriend...
Rich. Richard.
Oh...
- How can I help you, Richard?
- Right... The thing is,
Grace couldn't complete...
... couldn't finish
her music coursework, so, erm...
Grace was very talented.
Is.
She is very talented.
Yes, but, er...
So that's why I've finished off
her music coursework for her.
She's already done the vocals,
er, me and my mate, we've put some...
I'm sorry, it's for Grace
to pass it when she's ready.
She just needs the grade.
I'm sorry, Richard.
Grace has to do it.
This is no good.
Five minutes, nobody will know.
What harm can it do?
That's not the point.
So, what is the point?
Can you tell me that?
Don't go aggro on me, Richard.
Her father says no.
I have to give her something.
I'll give it to her.
You go home
and wait for her to ring you. OK?
Here...
Tell her I did my best,
and tell her that Alo helped me
cos he does computer shit
on his PlayStation.
All right.
And tell her that you're a mean old
cow who probably never gets laid.
I will.
I gotta say - that boyfriend
of yours is super nice.
You totally lucked out,
did you not, Gracey?
He says his mate helped him with it.
Whatever
I guess we'll listen, beautiful.
♪ Shades of wine
♪ Love keeps dancing through my mind
♪ No, I can't escape this time
♪ All because of you
♪ Yesterday,
love was just a word to say
♪ Overnight a holiday
♪ All because of you
♪ So unreal,
life was just a Ferris wheel
♪ Till you told me how to feel
♪ Things I never knew... ♪
Grace? It's me again.
Can you just wake up?
Where is she, then? Zurich.
Go and find her.
You awful, awful bastards!
You're a fucking joke.
What the fuck
has happened to us all?