Sister, Sister (1994–1999): Season 2, Episode 3 - Joey's Choice - full transcript

Mm-mmm!

Mr. Manager, you're

looking mmm-mmm good!

You know him?

No, but I can't wait

till he's on special.

- Uh, mom, you're
- kind of eating the food.

- Honey, I'm going
- to pay for it.

- Besides, they
- want you to eat.

- You keep
- up your strength

- So you can
- shop for more.



- I think it's
- time to pretend

- We don't know her.
- Yeah.

Honey, would you pick

me up some maxi pads?

Hi there.

- I just wanted
- to make sure

- That everything here
- at the food boy

Was satisfactory.

Hi.

Hi.

- I want you
- to know this never

- Would've happened if
- that sausage lady were here.

- Well, I'll let you
- slide this time.

I like to see a woman



enjoying herself.

Yeah, I still am.

Well, then you might

wanna take advantage

of the lamb chop special.

Hey, I do love a nice chop.

- Don't forget to take
- it home and cook it first.

Ooh, I'm sorry.

Clean-up on aisle four!

♪ Talk about

a two-way twister ♪

♪ shakin' up the family tree

with sibling synchronicity ♪

♪ never knew

how much I missed you ♪

♪ I ain't ever gonna

let... you... go ♪

Little ray, get...

What are you doing here?

- I told Lisa about
- letting you in this car.

- Watch that,
- that's leather down there.

Watch it, come on!

Get out of here, little

flea farm! Get out!

Come back, little ray!

Uh, yo, little ray, come back!

People, people!

Let's go!

Bag it, bag it, bag it!

Somebody ought to bag him.

The shake

machine's dry.

Twinsies, you're

falling behind.

We only have four hands, Steve.

You know, girls,

some people call me Steve,

but a lot of people

call me Mr. Peyser.

I mean, a lot of people.

But I'll leave that up to you.

Okay, Steve.

Hey, some kid just

hurled on the slide.

Tia, it's all yours.

But, Mr. Peyser, sir...

Ah, too late.

And don't forget

the two finger smile.

I finally know what I want.

Chinese.

Hi.

You work here?

No, I just do this for fun.

Oh, hi.

Hi.

- I'm sorry.
- This is really gross.

I know. My dog

did that all the time.

So, what'd you do about it?

We put him to sleep.

Oh, not because of that,

but because he was really old.

Well, I'm going to get

something to eat.

I'll pray for you.

Oh, welcome to rocket burger,

where all our beef patties,

- never fatty, come with onions,
- pickles, lettuce, tomato,

Mustard, ketchup,

and a little Mayo

and a slice of cheese,

if you please.

How did you do that so fast?

Well, it was hard at first,

but I finally got it memorized.

Whatever.

- Hi.
- Hi.

So, do you have a dog?

Uh, yeah, we've got, um,

corn dogs, chili dogs,

and a happy dog,

but don't be fooled

by its name.

So, I guess I'll just have

a root beer and fries.

Safe choice.

I'd like a regular burger,

- but this time I want
- extra tomatoes, extra pickles,

Extra onions, and throw in

some extra meat.

Oh, you're still here.

Uh, yeah.

So, what are you gonna get?

Fries, I thought.

Coming right up.

Sorry it took so long.

You are amazing.

Thanks.

Oops, I forgot your ketchup.

I met a guy.

Me, too!

Well, my guy's kinda shy.

My guy's smoking!

I love this job.

Tamera, counter, now!

Oh, here are your fries.

Hey, hey, looks good.

Good fries.

- A lot of fries.
- Do you wanna go out tonight?

Sure!

So, where do you wanna go?

Anywhere.

Here, there.

I love those places.

Tia?

Yes, Mr. Peyser?

Oh, that's much better.

Now, go skim the fat

out of the grease trap.

That's our secret sauce.

Be right back.

I wanted chicken fingers!

I wanted chicken fingers!

I think there's some

on the slide.

Um, here's your ketchup.

And we had some extra fries.

Thanks.

So, got rid of that fat?

Uh, yeah,

I've been working out.

So, what do you think

about a movie tonight?

Tonight?

Are you asking me out?

I thought I was.

Well, I like the way you think.

So, I'll see you at 7:30?

Great, I live

at 243 maple drive.

I know exactly

where's that.

See you then.

- Here are the directions
- to my house.

Uh, oh, well,

- I guess you can
- never be too sure.

So, what time do you

wanna pick me up?

I thought 7:30.

7:30's okay with me.

You know what,

you're kinda schizo,

but that's cool.

I just got a date!

Me, too!

We're dating!

Well, not each other.

Little ray!

Come on, little ray!

I got fancy feast!

Little ray!

Since when do you

call little ray?

Did I say little ray?

I meant little Richard.

Good golly, miss Molly,

what ever happened to him?

So, how's it going, Lisa?

Uh... something happened today,

but I don't know if I feel

like talking about it.

- Good, go with
- your instincts.

Ray, plant it. I need to vent.

What's the problem?

- I met this
- incredible man today,

- And, well,
- it's kind of hard to explain.

Just spit it out.

Unfortunately,

that's what I did.

You spit on the guy?

- Well, you know,
- in some cultures

- It's considered
- a sign of affection.

What culture is that?

- If I knew,
- I'd go hide there.

- Come on, so it was
- a little embarrassing, Lisa.

The guy's probably...

Not even thinking about it.

You think so, ray?

- He probably doesn't
- remember you.

Thanks, ray.

- You're a speck
- in his memory.

Put a sock in it, ray.

So, you liked him?

I don't know.

He's kind of nice and witty.

I thought there was some

real potential there.

- Why don't you
- go see him again?

Wouldn't it be weird

to go grocery shopping

twice in a day?

For you, no.

- Well, thanks
- for your help, ray.

- Would you mind
- letting little ray out?

Consider it done.

It's so cool

we both have dates.

But don't you feel sorry

for all poor girls

who aren't going out tonight?

Yeah.

- Yes!
- Yes!

- I hope you don't mind me
- borrowing your shoes.

- We're sisters.
- You don't even have to ask.

Thanks.

Aren't those my jeans?

Hey, you scammed my shoes.

Forget it.

Oh, there's my date!

No, it's probably mine.

- I can tell he's
- the punctual type.

Yeah, mine's too cool

to be on time.

- Hi, joey!
- Hi, joey!

How do you know Joey?

He's my date.

Nuh-unh, he's my date.

Uh-oh.

Uh-oh.

Hey, hey.

I can't believe you're twins.

How did this happen?

- Well, one egg
- split and then...

He doesn't mean that.

Well, hello.

Whose date are you?

I don't know.

- He's cute
- but he ain't too swift.

- Mom, he thought
- we were one person,

- And he asked
- both of us out.

Uh-oh, custody battle.

No, no, I'm sure

we can figure

something out.

- Yeah, I'll go out
- with him tonight,

Then I'll come home and

tell you all about it.

Could you excuse us, please?

- I can't wait till
- their triplet gets home.

Oh, there's three of them?

You're easy.

- Look, there's got
- to be a mature way

To figure this out.

- Well, I can only think
- of one fair way.

Alphabetically.

T-i, t-a. See ya!

Ray! Ray, get in here.

This is getting good.

- Remember the dates
- that both girls had tonight?

This is him.

Well, guess you feel like

you won the lottery.

Well, yeah...

This is as lucky

as you're going to get.

Didn't it occur to you

that the girls

had different names?

To tell you the truth,

I was so excited

about getting a date,

I forgot to ask.

How were you gonna make it?

I don't know,

I guess I was just gonna

say something like,

um, "hey, beautiful!"

- Or something
- more respectful.

We're back.

This is a toughie.

We couldn't decide,

- we're just gonna have
- to forget the whole thing.

Go to the car,

I'll meet you there.

I heard that.

Look, look, look.

- Why don't we
- just all go?

- Good,
- I'll get my coat.

Let's get out of here.

Now, girls,

be home by 11:00.

- What movie you kids
- going to see?

Who cares?

Ray! Stay.

Well, hello again.

Isn't this

a pleasant...

surprise.

- Might as well
- get me some chicken.

Oh.

Whoa! Oh!

Ooh, ooh, ooh!

Whoa, chickie!

Hey, Lisa, is that you?

Oh, hi.

What a surprise.

Are you okay?

Oh, yeah.

I'm fine.

Never been better.

So, how's business?

Fine. You know, I think you

got your scarf caught there.

Really?

Yeah.

Uh, let me help you.

- Oh, no!
- It's no problem.

- I got it.
- No, I got it, I got it.

I-I g... I...

You should've seen

the one that got away.

Don't worry about it.

Uh, that happens all...

- Well, no.
- Most people use the tongs.

Yeah.

- I'll try that
- next time.

So you're back again, huh?

Oh, you noticed.

Yeah, I come here a lot,

'cause I love to cook.

- Well, I love - to eat.
- Oh, yeah?

- Well, so your wife
- cooks for you?

- No, I'm not
- married.

- Your girlfriend
- cooks for you?

- I don't have
- a girlfriend.

- You live with your mother?
- No.

- A guy named Fred?
- Uh-uh.

Well, I don't want to pry.

So, uh, are you

seeing anybody?

Just this chicken.

Well, you know, it's hard

to meet people, you know.

- It's such
- a big city.

Yeah, big, big city.

Lots of single people, wanting

to meet other single people.

- Sometimes making
- a connection happens

- When you least
- expect it.

- Mm-hmm.
- On a bus, in a church,

- In a supermarket
- poultry section.

Uh, Lisa, I've been

meaning to call you.

Me?

- Yeah, but I really
- didn't know how to say it.

Oh, just say it.

- Uh, it's kind
- of personal.

I got nothing with personal.

Your check bounced.

Oh, I'd love to...

What?

Really? You're in a band?

- Well, it's not
- really a band.

It's just a bunch of us guys

- hanging around
- playing music together.

That's a band.

I know. I was trying

to be modest, 'cause

I heard girls like that.

We do.

My turn.

It's been five minutes already?

- Move it,
- move it, move it,

Move it, move it!

So, what's

your band called?

- Well, we don't really
- have a name.

- It's a symbol,
- like what prince did.

What a cool idea!

You thought that was so stupid.

She went on for days.

I just didn't like

that man/woman thing.

- But I'm sure
- Joey's symbol is great.

Yeah, it's a cockroach

with his head cut off.

- See,
- now that's profound.

Yeah.

This is a killer shake.

Can I try some?

Oh, sure.

Oh, this is good.

You know, Tia, you should

go up there and get one.

Well, you know,

I'd like to try it first.

This is the best milkshake

I've ever had.

I don't know who

you are, but I want

to study at your feet.

- Roger,
- we're on a date.

Can I dip in?

I kind of work alone.

- You know,
- I'm kind of a loner, too.

A solitary man.

The wanderer.

I'm a lone wolf.

Please let me

sit with you.

Roger, go home!

Yeah, I'm leaving.

But I'm leaving with dignity.

You know, girls, tonight

started out kind of weird,

but I'm having a good time.

Me, too.

So am I.

Why didn't he ask me out?

Window of opportunity was wide

open, he just shut the blinds.

Let's recap, shall we?

You were caught

eating off the shelf,

- you spit on him,
- you wrote him a bad check,

You had a chicken

around your neck.

That never happened to you?

He still may call.

- Guys can
- get desperate.

Where's little ray?

I need me some

intelligent conversation.

- I haven't seen him all day.
- Have you?

- You know, Lisa,
- I think it's important

- Not to get too attached
- to your pet.

I'm not attached.

I just love him to death.

Funny you should mention

the word "death."

Little ray! Little ray!

Little ray, little

ray, come home!

This isn't working.

Lassie, Lassie,

come home!

- Little ray,
- come home!

- Look,
- the girls love you.

- Um, Lisa
- loves you.

I... I've always had

a problem with intimacy.

Little ray,

I've got treats!

I had a great time tonight.

So did I.

- When do you two
- want to go out again?

Tomorrow.

Stop that!

You know, I don't know

if this is working.

Yeah.

Joey, we really like you...

But this isn't fair to us,

and it isn't fair to you.

I don't mind.

Well, I guess you're just

gonna have to choose one of us.

Really?

- Yeah, there's
- no other way.

Okay, I guess

it's, uh, Tia.

Oh, uh, I'm really sorry.

No, no, it's fine.

I'll take you, tamera.

- Roger, what are you
- doing here?

The lone wolf needs a mate.

Go home, Roger!

Well, good night.

Are you sure you're okay?

Yeah, I'm fine.

I hate myself for asking,

and not that it matters,

but what I really

want to ask is... why?

I don't know.

- I really didn't
- know who to choose,

So I just came up with

some stupid reason.

I liked her shoes.

Oh.

Well, good night.

Hey, those were my shoes.

Hello.

No, there ain't

no Antoine here.

Sorry?

You're sorry?

- When a person
- hears the phone,

It makes their heart flip-flop,

it lands in their stomach,

- 'cause it might be
- that someone

They've been waiting for.

Not that I haven't

had a good life,

- but a good man might be
- an extra frosting

- That could make it real sweet,
- and the thing...

What you mean you got to go?

Hi, honey.

So how'd the three peas

in a pod go?

This pea got squished.

Huh?

Joey picked Tia.

He picked my baby?

Oh, I'm so sorry.

I didn't think it would

bother me so much.

I was so stupid.

- Why did I tell
- him to choose?

He didn't even know

we were twins.

Honey, you have learned

a very valuable lesson:

Men shouldn't think.

- They should just sit there
- and look pretty.

And if they can't look pretty,

they should just

go outside and fix something.

I hate this.

I mean, you sit around

waiting for some guy

- to pick you,
- call you, like you.

Men.

I hear you.

Mm-hmm.

I'm still sitting here

waiting for Mr. Food boy

to make the first move.

You are?

- Hey, take it from
- a woman with experience,

You want something,

you do the moving.

You're right.

Hmm, watch me move!

I'm gonna make

that food boy my man.

And wear good shoes!

Terrence, drop that

squash and listen up.

- I like you, I can't
- imagine you don't like me,

So I say you and I go

out tomorrow night.

Sure.

Good. I'm glad you're a man

not put off by

a liberated woman like myself.

Got it.

- If anyone asks,
- you asked me.

Got it.

Well, then, I'll see you

tomorrow night at 7:30.

I'll be there.

Oh!

And don't be late.

So, are you still mad at me

about the whole Joey thing?

Nah.

- I hope you have
- a good time tonight.

Thanks. Can I borrow

your leather jacket?

No.

Little ray!

- Oh, little ray!
- Hey, where's the fire?

- I feel like we haven't
- seen you in days.

- Yeah, we've been
- ignoring you.

Oh, come here.

Give us a little

kitty kiss.

Oh, no, don't give me that end!

Hey, look who I found.

Uh, it's little ray.

- I don't know where he's been,
- but he has been - Eating well.

I'm just so glad that...

Little ray?

Later, fatso.