Shooting Stars (1993–2011): Season 1, Episode 4 - Episode #1.4 - full transcript
Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the
celebrity TV quiz, Shooting Stars!
And introducing Team A, please welcome
Leslie Ash!
Lovely, pretty Leslie.
Sweet soft-skinned, lovely Leslie.
Kind, warm, graceful Leslie.
Delicate Leslie, dainty Leslie.
Oh, Leslie!
Elegant, elf-like,
sweet smelling Leslie.
Oh, lovely Leslie!
Oh, Leslie.
And joining Leslie on team A,
please welcome Syd Little.
Slim, suave, sophisticated,
four-eyed sex magnet Syd,
is a sort of comedian.
Despite his slender frame,
he eats like a pig.
Syd doesn't need to wear specs,
he just likes the look.
He says: "It makes me look
just like Buddy Holly".
What do you think?
And joining Leslie and Syd, please
welcome the captain of Team A:
Mister Mark Lamarr.
And introducing Team B,
please welcome Eddie Large.
Podgy fun-bucket and Danny Baker
look-a-like Eddie,
likes nothing better than making love
on a rug in front of a roaring open fire.
Sadly, Eddie now lives in a tower block,
and it's just not the same
in front of a radiator.
And joining Eddie on team B,
please welcome Bill Oddie.
Ugly Bill, the bird spotter, lives in a nest,
high on a cliff at a secret location.
Since becoming a protected species himself,
his eggs are guarded 24 hours a day,
by a team of armed bin men.
And now: Please welcome the captain
of Team B: Miss Ulrika Jonsson.
And finally: Please welcome your hosts
for this evening:
Vic Reeves and Bob Mortimer!
Welcome to Shooting Stars!
Welcome whoever you are!
- The stars have been greeted...
- ...and successfully seated.
So come along, and let's start
Shooting Stars!
Feel my soooooooooooooooong....
Ladies and gentlemen,
welcome to Shooting Stars,
the celebrity quiz, where the contestants
sit, either side here of the rostrum.
It's just an experiment, we'll see how
it works as this evening goes along.
- Bob.
- What?
Over there.
That's the bloke of 'The Goodies'.
It's Bill Oddie, yeah.
It's his name, Bill Oddie.
He's over there!
- I know, it's...
- Look! He's over there!
He's on the quiz, Vic, yeah.
- What quiz?
- Shooting Stars. You know, the quiz?
- What's that?
- Shooting Stars.
W-What's that?
- You where stupid, you where.
- Ey? What!?
- Yeah.
- What!?
- You're an idiot!
- What did you say!?
I said you're an idiot, Vic.
- Yeah, well, at least I'm not attractive!
- Yeah!
There, you've got a point, there.
Anyway, ladies and gentlemen,
without any further ado,
lets meet the man with the scores:
it's George Dawes!
Go on, George!
- That's George!
- He's just a big baby!
He's a kind-of baby.
He's a sort-of, kind-of baby.
Ladies and gentlemen,
the rules are relatively simple,
there's open rounds, individual
rounds, and team rounds.
And on the open rounds, contestants,
we really wanna see those fingers!
We REALLY wanna see those fingers.
- We REALLY wanna see those fingers.
- Have you got any fingers, there?
There's a lot, now let me get over here.
Really wanna see those fingers,
- now, I've seen them.
- Nice finger work, Ulrika, you're learning.
Yeah. Go on, get on with it.
Now, if you should hear this noise... No!
If you should hear THIS noise during the
course of the quiz...
Don't worry,
it's just one of the eggs hatching,
that Bill's been incubating on his seat.
So, there is no panic.
A lovely, little egg hatching.
Do you EAT eggs, Bill?
- I do, yes.
- You do?
- Oh, it surprises me.
- For breakfast?
For breakfast sometimes, and sometimes
for lunch, and sometimes for tea, yeah.
- Are you quite an egg man?
- I am.
What about you, Ulrika?
What do you have for breakfast?
Um...
You being Swedish,
it's probably muesli, isn't it?
You know, twigs, sticks...
- Bits of crone, you know?
- Bits of sticks suspended in yoghurt.
Basic aggregate.
I think... Being educated,
that's from Switzerland, isn't it?
- Is it?
- Yes.
Oh?
So, do you have, just pine beds...
For breakfast?
- Well, there is...
- And saunas.
- Just a log.
- D'you have a sauna for breakfast?
I do.
Well, that would account for you
being bald, Ulrika.
What about you, Syd?
- For breakfast?
- For breakfast? Uh...
A piece of toast, that's it.
- Just a simple piece of toast?
- Simple piece of toast.
I had you down as a Sugar Puff man.
Leslie?
What do you have for breakfast?
Just the tea.
Just the t... Ah!
I bet, you have, uh...
Rainbows, buttercups, dew drops...
All washed down with some lovely angel tears.
Stop it, Vic.
I bet you do, don't you?
- I'm sorry.
- I like your hair like that, it's lovely.
- Uh, I'm sorry, Leslie. Vic, stop it!
- What?
It's like having a big naan bread
rearing down on you, isn't it?
Anyway...
As I said: The rules are simple,
there's open rounds, team rounds,
and individual rounds;
really wanna see those fingers...
REALLY wanna see those fingers.
And let's start of with the first round,
which is 'True or false'.
True, or false? TRUE...
...or false? I think they get the idea,
well done.
True or false.
And the first question is to YOU, Bill.
Thank you.
Bill, true or false? Martin Sheen was
born with his left arm, the left arm...
Three inches shorter than his right arm.
True or false?
Um, that is true. That is true.
- It IS true, Bill.
- It is true.
It is quite true.
Well done, Bill!
- Syd!
- Yes?
Lovely Syd. Sitting over there.
Can you see me, Syd?
Yes, yes, yes.
I tell you what...
Via the gift of television, we can
Syd sees through his eyes, there.
Syd!
Can you see us?
Syd, over here!
Over here, Syd! Can you see us?
Over here!
Have you got us?
- Very good, yes.
- Just vague shadows, really, isn't it?
So if you'd like to use your ears, Syd,
we might get somewhere.
Syd, true or false. When filming in Japan,
Jeremy Beadle was mistaken
for a type of giant toad...
...and was locked in a zoological
science lab for 14 minutes...
...before being rescued by his film crew.
True or false?
False!
- It's false!
- It IS false!
Pretty close to it being true.
Well done.
Ulrika.
You know Wolf of 'Gladiators'?
Is he a REAL wolf?
- Do the question.
- Well, I'll do the question, Ulrika.
Ulrika. Marlon Brando's occupation on
his passport is Shepard. True or false?
- False?
- "False?"
I'm sorry Ulrika, it's true.
See? I'm gonna lose.
God, you are husky tonight.
I guess I should be surprised
there isn't a sleigh behind you.
I know!
Can we carry on? Stop it, Bob!
- What did I do!?
- Just behave yourself!
I'm just showing you me tonsils.
Mark! Here's your question. Lovely Mark,
the team captain for Team A.
Can I just interrupt you, there...
- ...for a second, Vic?
- Yes.
Mark, what did you put down
for your passport?
50's throwback.
This joke really will not die, will it?
This '50's throwback' thing?
- No, it won't.
- Well, what did you put down?
You two, dressed up like a couple of extras
from 'Oliver's', and Victorian pounces.
And you...
Your haircut's the same as mine, Reeves!
- Mark?
- I think not!
- Mark there's a lot of...
- I do not put ghee in my hair!
Mark. Here's your lovely question.
Mark, Richard Branson was teased
as a child because of his beard.
True or false?
True.
- What?
- True.
No, it's false.
- It's a false beard.
- It was a false beard? Yes, well done.
Eddie. True or false?
Cliff Richard is gay.
- Come on.
- Ey?
- You can't ask him that!
- What?
- You can't say that!
- Oh, I'll do another one, sorry Eddie!
Eddie. True or false?
O.J. Simpson is a murderer.
You can't say these questions!
- Ask him the proper one.
- All right!
- Ask him the proper question!
- Here it comes. Eddie?
Eddie? Jimmy Nail was the lead singer
in Lindisfarne. True or false?
Oh, that is... That is false.
It IS false! He was not the singer
lead in Lindisfarne. Well done, Eddie!
Leslie. Here's your question.
I think you ARE looking
lovely tonight, love.
Leslie.
I hope you get this one right, actually.
Rosanne Barr, broke a rabbits' neck,
when she put it in the washing machine,
because its feet where dirty. True or false?
False.
- It's true!
- True.
No, it is! It's true.
Poor little... Poor little rabbit!
Leslie? Leslie...
Poor little rabbit!
Leslie, he's trying to prove to you
that he's cute.
- I'm cuter than you!
- No, you're not.
I think I... You'd find that I'm...
- Who's cuter, Ulrika, me or him?
- I'm cuter than you!
Who's cuter, Ulrika. Me or Jim?
Well, that's the end of the
'True or false' round,
which leads us to say:
What are the scores, George Dawes?
No, no. Please.
And, Mark Lamarr's team have got one point.
And Ulrika Jonsson's team,
they've got two points.
Well done!
Now, the next round
is called 'The clips round'.
Because, we're gonna show some clips
to the teams and ask them questions
about that clip. And the first clip
is for you, Mark.
Thank you, Moira.
Later, we'll be bringing you up to date
on the most wanted, and perhaps
the most dangerous man in Britain. How he
got away, and did the Police blunder?
That's a funny clip, isn't it?
But Mark, AND your team...
And you can confer on this one.
Can you name three pop stars
who have played criminals and most
wanted men in the movies?
Eh, yes, erm... The Who.
- Roger Daltrey?
- Roger Daltrey.
- McVicar.
- Errrmmm...
- And the two Kemp chaps in 'The Krays'.
- Oh, yes.
- That's right, The Krays.
- Oooh, four.
- Oh, that's three.
- That's four.
- Three.
- Four?
- The two.
- Oh? Well done!
Well done, Mark.
Team B. Here's your clip.
Take a look at this.
He's had a stroke.
Reckoned it was something like that.
Is that all you can do, James?
Could you tell me what happened next?
- Oh...
- Uh, the...
The... Dog produced puppies?
- Ah, very good answer!
- That's a nice answer.
Is that your final answer?
Anyone wanna go?
Go on, you have... You have a go.
Uh... It DIDN'T produce puppies.
Okay. Let's take a look and see
what happened.
Is that all you can do, James?
He's not in pain. He's quite comfortable.
Yes...
And THEN it produced puppies, yes.
James then had a little Tommy-squeaker,
and the dog fled.
Not altogether, the fairer question,
so I'll offer you this one.
Which newspaper did Christopher Timothy,
whom we saw there,
which newspaper did he advertise?
- Come on.
- Come on, there's a newspaper...
- I'll give you that as a clue.
- The Sun.
"The Sun" is the correct answer!
The correct... Answer!
- Syd?
- Yes!
- Syd? Whoa!
- That's me!
- Syd? Can you see us?
- Nice to see you!
Syd, what newspaper do YOU read?
The Sun, yes, yes.
- You read 'The Sun'?
- Oh, yes.
D'you not find that if the Sun,
the REAL Sun...
That's why I wear glasses.
Well, if it's behind you, does it not burn
a couple of holes into the newspaper?
Right! Of course, it doesn't.
Bill?
Bill? Do you take any...
He looks a bit distracted
at the moment, but he is!
Bill? You must have... You know, all
those long hours you spend in a hide.
Yes.
You must have some publication taken
there to relieve your... The...
- To relieve the boredom?
- Ehm...
You haven't got any watches,
have you, there?
- Birdwatch Magazine...
- Birdwatch Magazine...
That's a very good...
What's going on over there!? Oi!
Oi!
- Can I wear it?
- Yeah, you're all right.
- Two guineas.
- Two guineas?
What's going on over here!?
- No ration cards!
- I'm just getting some of Mark's gear.
It's top gear.
Will you put that stuff away?
I've told you: No selling of that s...
Whatever you keep in the back
of your turnip van.
Hey Vic, you can shout, but some...
But look, I've got a Raul Jax watch, here.
Look a that! How beautiful.
- Will you put it away?!
- It's worth about two...
What where you doing,
buying stuff of him, for?!
- He says it worth two grand.
- You must be stupid!!!
At least, I'm not attractive.
Well, it's that time of the evening where...
We do the...
It's that time of the evening, Vic,
where we do the impressions round.
- Oh!
- Yeah! Oh, yes!
So called because, uhm... Mister Vic Reeves
and myself do impressions of celebrities...
- Very good impressions!
- Well...
And you have to guess who it is
we're doing and impression of.
So, if you're ready... Contestants?
Tell me, who is this?
"Would it be, at all possible for you to
clean out the scratching posts,
in the ladies cubicles, please, Laura?"
Lamarr!
Too late, Ulrika. Lamarr.
Chris Barrie.
Chris Barrie!
Oh, yeah!
She wouldn't get that, would she?
- Did you have that, Ulrika?
- I did.
Yeah, you got it just a little bit too late.
- Shame.
- As always.
Ladies and gentlemen, who is this?
"Deirdre. You must have my..."
- Jonsson!
- Large!
Large!
- Large Jonsson?
- It's a large Jonsson!
- Shamir? Shamir?
- Shamir?
I think you're thinking of
a line of cloth.
Samir! Samir!
- Samir!
- It was Samir!
No, at this point, ladies and gentlemen,
we like to an impression in The Club Style.
Because Vic is a very good club singer,
and he's gonna sing a song,
in the style of a... I... Sorry.
Now, at this point...
Every time I see Ulrika's tash, I cough.
Now there, ladies and gentlemen.
For the next impression,
Vic in the club singer style,
is gonna sing a very popular song,
and you must guess what that song is.
So, if you're ready, George Dawes?
Bill Oddie!
"Singing the blues"?
- No.
- No! Sorry. Carry on, George.
Lamarr!
- My Coo Ca Choo.
- My Coo Ca Choo.
Well done, indeed.
And now, let's hear how it should
sound, sung properly.
Thank you, George!
Well, that's half time, and I've got
myself some sandwiches.
- Have you?
- From the outside, there.
- There we go.
- Are you not having anything?
You didn't bother? Oh? Shame.
Leslie...
I've got you something, here,
that I'd like you to open.
I've admired you for a long time,
especially the work...
A lot, a lot of the work you did
on 'The Tube'. And I...
I'm only sorry that it didn't work out
for you and Sir Bob, so...
- You didn't take over...
- Stop that. Vic!
And if you ever do need...
Vic, stop touching yourself!
I'm sorry! Stop rubbing yourself!
I will sit in over here.
You didn't tell her we're through.
Sorry, my dear.
- Thank you!
- It's a pleasure.
I've just about finished my sandwich, Vic.
I don't mind telling you.
Just about finished it. But, I'll leave
it now, 'cause we've better move on
to the next round, which is
The Dove from Above.
So called, because we greet a dove...
...from above.
And if you could join in, contestants?
And give us a little bit of a coo.
Let's bring that dove down from above.
Come on!
There it is. That beautiful Dove from Above.
In all its glory.
What type of dove is that, Bill?
It's a white one.
Actually, I think that is a pigeon.
I think you'll find that it is
the Dove from Above.
It's a pigeon, and try to
rhyme THAT with something!
Well, there's always 'smidgen'.
- If you're swivelling.
- Yeah.
Yeah, hm. Now, the Dove from Above,
that beautiful creature.
Mythical creature, I believe.
Now, written on its flaunt...
- Flounders!
- Flounders!
Written on its flaunts, there,
are categories of questions.
I want you to choose one of those
categories... Mark.
Yeah, they did this in the 50's...
I want you to choose one of those categories,
and we'll ask you a question on it.
Now...
Hidden behind one of these categories
is a special price.
And if you should choose that,
you'll hear this noise:
Eranu!
And if you should answer incorrectly,
you'll hear this noise:
Ouvavu!
So, for the special price, it's:
Eranu!
And for an incorrect answer, it's:
Ouvavu!
So, if that's clear,
I'm gonna go straight to you, Bill.
I'm gonna ask you, Bill,
to choose a category.
I would choose 'Initials', please.
Initials.
Here it is, here.
Bill, name three celebrities who have
the same initial letter
for their Christian name and their surname.
Such as, hmmm, yeah, Arthur Askey.
Marilyn Monroe. Brigitte Bardot...
...and Arthur Askey.
No, no, no, no!
- Oh, oh, oh, no, no!
- Ey?
- Oh, no!
- Okay. Okay.
No, we can't have 'Arthur Askey'.
Come on, Bill.
Uh, Donald Duck.
- Well done!
- Oh, yes!
Syd!
Lovely little Syd, over there.
Here's your question.
Actually, you'd better pick
a category first, don't you?
- Pick one.
- Uh, 'Space'.
- What?
- Space.
- Smegs?
- No, Space.
- Space. Have you got 'Space', there?
- Yeah, there it is.
Here's one for you, Syd.
Scotty, McCoy and...
'Uhuru'...
...where all officers onboard the
star ship Enterprise.
What was each of them responsible for?
Could we try it again?
- We'll know it.
- Captain...? Could you take it...
- That again? Scotty. What was he?
- Well, Scotty, he was the engineer.
Correct. McCoy?
He was the doctor.
"Bones", they used to call him.
Chief medical officer, yes,
I'll give you that one. And...
What?
Nitpicking, now, are we?
- Nitpicking.
- And, finally...
'Uhuru'.
Uh... Oh, she was... Er...
Oh, she pressed the buttons
on the dash... Erm...
Navigation.
- Ey?
- Navigation?
What was that? Communication?
Communication! That's it!
Communication...
There was a hint of 'navigation'
about that, Syd. I don't know.
Ulllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll
rikaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!
If you can still see me through that
moustache, tell me...
What category do you desire?
I desire... Um....
- 'Relatives'
- Relatives?
Have you got that there, Vic?
Here it is.
Look at this picture, Ulrika,
and tell me whose brother is this?
And you can see him in
the shadows behind.
- A bit of a clue there, in the shadow.
- With an axe in his hand.
Any ideas?
- Oh, Crikey!
- It, um...
- I think they'll gonna get it.
- Calvin Klein?
Calvin Klein!?
Ouvavu!
- Ouvavu.
- Ouvavu!
- Hear the 'avuvu', feel the...
- Ouvavu!
- Know that you're wrong!
- Ouvavu!
It could be... Um...
- It could be, Ulrika, but it isn't.
- Ouvavu!
You COULD get counter-off shoes,
but you don't!
You don't know what it is!
Ouvavu!
I'm sorry, you haven't got it,
let's see who it is.
- It's gonna be revealed now...
- Cilla.
It's Bernard Manning!
- Oh, excusez-moi!
- Bernard Manning!
- That's fair!
- A Bernard Manning!
Bernard Manning.
Mark?
You swine!
Here's your... Well, actually, you'd
better pick one first, haven't you?
Pick us... Pick us a category, Mark.
Uh, 'Taxis'.
- Taxis.
- Taxis.
I've got it here. Taxi question
for YOU, Mark.
In 'Carry On Cabby', what was
the name of the rival cab firm,
set up by Hattie Jacques?
Jacques' Cabs.
Ouvavu!
It was 'Glam Cabs'.
- Eddie!
- Yes.
- Eddie!
- Eddie!
Pick a category.
Uh... 'Pubs'.
Pubs.
You got jarred in one all night,
didn't you?
Eddie, name the pubs that feature
in the soaps Coronation Street,
Emmerdale Farm, and Eastenders.
Oh, yes. AND Eastenders.
Eh... Rovers Return.
- Coronation Street.
- Coronation Street.
- Emmerdale; Woolpack.
- Woolpack.
And, eh... The Queen Vic, mate.
The Queen Vic, that's well
answered, there. Well done!
Leslie, pick a category.
Um...
'Characters'.
Characters? And what a lovely
character you've got.
Leslie. What did these
two characters have in common?
And here's a picture of them, here.
Captain Mannering and Arthur Daly.
What do they have in common?
What do they have in COMMON, Leslie?
Leslie, what do they have in common?
If they had anything in common,
what was it?
How would the duo have in common?
He's trying to flog broaches.
- Yeah, every chance.
- Commercials.
- Commercials?
- Commercials.
Ouvavu!
Ulrika Jonsson?
Both have a wife...
...and you never see them.
- Exactly!
- Well done!
- Bravo.
- Well done!
Well done, I say, Ulrika! My word!
Both have a wife who was never
actually seen on film or screen.
That's the end of that round.
So let's go straight over to
George Dawes, and ask:
What are the scores, George Dawes?
And the scores are...
Mark Lamarr's team have got 5 points,
they quite cool dudes...
And Ulrika Jonsson's team,
they got 7 points. Congratulations!
- Well done, Ulrika.
- Well done!
I wonder, this might just be
your night, Ulrika.
Thank you very much, indeed.
It's all gonna be decided on this
final round.
That's right. It's all gonna be
decided on this round, because...
We're going in for the Quick Fire round.
That's right, we're against the clock here.
Now, we don't know how long we've got,
but when the time's over,
you'll hear this noise:
- There we are. So, let's go.
- Let's go ahead with the Quick Fire round.
It's on the buzzers. Please, please please,
we really wanna see those fingers.
- We REALLY wanna see those fingers.
- Wanna see those fingers.
What a lovely finger, Leslie!
Thank you, Vic. Going Straight...
'Going Straight' was the sequel
to which comedy series? Lamarr!
Porridge.
Correct.
Which flowers are associated with
Dame Edna Everage?
Jonsson.
- Gladiolas.
- Correct.
Gladiolas. Which comedian did Neil
Morrissey replace in the comedy...
Ash.
'Men behaving badly', Harry Enfield.
Correct answer, Ash.
What are the names of the two puppets
featured regularly on 'The Big Breakfast'?
Lamarr.
- Zig and Zag.
- Correct.
Name any part of The Queen.
Lamarr.
- Oh, for God's...
- Arms.
No, I'm sorry, it was the nose.
Name me a hairy dog.
- A what?
- Oddie!
A hairy dog? Poodle!
I was thinking about an Alsatian, sorry.
Very close.
How woody is Woody Allen?
Jonsson.
Very.
- No...
- Is the correct answer!
- Is it?!
- Yes, it is.
Oh, blimey!
It appears he becomes very woody!
What does his wife say to him,
the first thing in the morning?
- I don't know.
- "Morning, wood."
Nice one!
Who is the man from Auntie?
Lamarr.
- Ben Elton.
- Correct.
Who is better known as McGinnis and Mead?
Him, and me.
- Correct.
- Correct, Eddie.
And that means, it's the ending of the quiz,
so George Dawes, what are the final scores?
If you guys knew who I was...
And the final scores are:
Mark Lamarr's team have got 9 points,
but Ulrika Jonsson IS the winner,
with 11, goddamned points!
Well done, Ulrika!
I've gotta hand it to you,
you guys are good!
Yeah, you where great!
You guys where good!
- But...
- It's that funny smelling...
Nobody leaves this arena
open hearted, because...
...we've got a special price for you:
It's these David Bowie style, face zigzags.
Now it can be Aladdin Sane-day, every day
of the week, and not just Sundays.
Not just Sundays! You could be
David Bowie, every day of the week.
There you are, Leslie!
Our winner's over here tonight.
Now then...
Ulrika, you're the team captain...
You've got two lovely, hunky fellows
on either side of you.
Which one of you is gonna take
the 'Vibro-sprout challenge'?
I think it's Eddie, as far as I know.
- No, it's...
- Eddie?
Well... As far as I know,
I thought it was Bill.
And, as far as I know,
I think it's you!
Is it me?
- Yeah, go on!
- Is it you?
I don't know!
I don't think he cares who's
gonna come up.
Ulrika! YOU join me to take the
'Vibro-sprout challenge'.
Here we are, Ulrika.
There's the platform, and there's
Bob to tell you all about it.
Hi, Ulrika! You'd like to step
onto the vibro platform...
Now, here, on this, uh... Good book,
here, I have nine sprouts and a radish.
Each sprout represents 10 pounds,
the royal radish: 50 pounds.
Now, you've already got 11 points,
which we've converted into pounds,
that means 11 pounds.
That's right, you've got potentially
140 pounds here on this good book.
Take it in your hand, Ulrika.
We're gonna vibrate you,
whatever sprout or radish remains,
we'll add that to your already won
10 pounds. So... Vic?
- Are we ready to vibrate?
- Three...
- Two...
- Oh, she's lost one!
- Hold your horses!
- Hold a minute.
That'll be terribly unfair. Are you
steady? You have been drinking a bit,
haven't you, Ulrika? You're all right...
There we are. To each one represents
10 pounds, let's see how many are left
after the 20 seconds that's on
the clock now, can we see that?
Yes. So, Vic?
Three... Two... One...
- Go!
- Vibro-sprout!
- Don't let them go!
- Don't let 'em go!
Let go of the radish,
you're on line to score!
We're still... I think...
I can see... Eight radishes...
She's doing well! She's doing very,
very well, she's keeping them central.
- She's keeping them...
- Five...
Four...
Three...
Two...
One...
One, two, three, four, five.
FIVE sprouts! 50 pounds!
That makes a total of 60 pounds!
Good night! Come and join us!
60 pounds!
60 pounds! Can you believe it?
Well done, Ulrika!
Extraordinary!
celebrity TV quiz, Shooting Stars!
And introducing Team A, please welcome
Leslie Ash!
Lovely, pretty Leslie.
Sweet soft-skinned, lovely Leslie.
Kind, warm, graceful Leslie.
Delicate Leslie, dainty Leslie.
Oh, Leslie!
Elegant, elf-like,
sweet smelling Leslie.
Oh, lovely Leslie!
Oh, Leslie.
And joining Leslie on team A,
please welcome Syd Little.
Slim, suave, sophisticated,
four-eyed sex magnet Syd,
is a sort of comedian.
Despite his slender frame,
he eats like a pig.
Syd doesn't need to wear specs,
he just likes the look.
He says: "It makes me look
just like Buddy Holly".
What do you think?
And joining Leslie and Syd, please
welcome the captain of Team A:
Mister Mark Lamarr.
And introducing Team B,
please welcome Eddie Large.
Podgy fun-bucket and Danny Baker
look-a-like Eddie,
likes nothing better than making love
on a rug in front of a roaring open fire.
Sadly, Eddie now lives in a tower block,
and it's just not the same
in front of a radiator.
And joining Eddie on team B,
please welcome Bill Oddie.
Ugly Bill, the bird spotter, lives in a nest,
high on a cliff at a secret location.
Since becoming a protected species himself,
his eggs are guarded 24 hours a day,
by a team of armed bin men.
And now: Please welcome the captain
of Team B: Miss Ulrika Jonsson.
And finally: Please welcome your hosts
for this evening:
Vic Reeves and Bob Mortimer!
Welcome to Shooting Stars!
Welcome whoever you are!
- The stars have been greeted...
- ...and successfully seated.
So come along, and let's start
Shooting Stars!
Feel my soooooooooooooooong....
Ladies and gentlemen,
welcome to Shooting Stars,
the celebrity quiz, where the contestants
sit, either side here of the rostrum.
It's just an experiment, we'll see how
it works as this evening goes along.
- Bob.
- What?
Over there.
That's the bloke of 'The Goodies'.
It's Bill Oddie, yeah.
It's his name, Bill Oddie.
He's over there!
- I know, it's...
- Look! He's over there!
He's on the quiz, Vic, yeah.
- What quiz?
- Shooting Stars. You know, the quiz?
- What's that?
- Shooting Stars.
W-What's that?
- You where stupid, you where.
- Ey? What!?
- Yeah.
- What!?
- You're an idiot!
- What did you say!?
I said you're an idiot, Vic.
- Yeah, well, at least I'm not attractive!
- Yeah!
There, you've got a point, there.
Anyway, ladies and gentlemen,
without any further ado,
lets meet the man with the scores:
it's George Dawes!
Go on, George!
- That's George!
- He's just a big baby!
He's a kind-of baby.
He's a sort-of, kind-of baby.
Ladies and gentlemen,
the rules are relatively simple,
there's open rounds, individual
rounds, and team rounds.
And on the open rounds, contestants,
we really wanna see those fingers!
We REALLY wanna see those fingers.
- We REALLY wanna see those fingers.
- Have you got any fingers, there?
There's a lot, now let me get over here.
Really wanna see those fingers,
- now, I've seen them.
- Nice finger work, Ulrika, you're learning.
Yeah. Go on, get on with it.
Now, if you should hear this noise... No!
If you should hear THIS noise during the
course of the quiz...
Don't worry,
it's just one of the eggs hatching,
that Bill's been incubating on his seat.
So, there is no panic.
A lovely, little egg hatching.
Do you EAT eggs, Bill?
- I do, yes.
- You do?
- Oh, it surprises me.
- For breakfast?
For breakfast sometimes, and sometimes
for lunch, and sometimes for tea, yeah.
- Are you quite an egg man?
- I am.
What about you, Ulrika?
What do you have for breakfast?
Um...
You being Swedish,
it's probably muesli, isn't it?
You know, twigs, sticks...
- Bits of crone, you know?
- Bits of sticks suspended in yoghurt.
Basic aggregate.
I think... Being educated,
that's from Switzerland, isn't it?
- Is it?
- Yes.
Oh?
So, do you have, just pine beds...
For breakfast?
- Well, there is...
- And saunas.
- Just a log.
- D'you have a sauna for breakfast?
I do.
Well, that would account for you
being bald, Ulrika.
What about you, Syd?
- For breakfast?
- For breakfast? Uh...
A piece of toast, that's it.
- Just a simple piece of toast?
- Simple piece of toast.
I had you down as a Sugar Puff man.
Leslie?
What do you have for breakfast?
Just the tea.
Just the t... Ah!
I bet, you have, uh...
Rainbows, buttercups, dew drops...
All washed down with some lovely angel tears.
Stop it, Vic.
I bet you do, don't you?
- I'm sorry.
- I like your hair like that, it's lovely.
- Uh, I'm sorry, Leslie. Vic, stop it!
- What?
It's like having a big naan bread
rearing down on you, isn't it?
Anyway...
As I said: The rules are simple,
there's open rounds, team rounds,
and individual rounds;
really wanna see those fingers...
REALLY wanna see those fingers.
And let's start of with the first round,
which is 'True or false'.
True, or false? TRUE...
...or false? I think they get the idea,
well done.
True or false.
And the first question is to YOU, Bill.
Thank you.
Bill, true or false? Martin Sheen was
born with his left arm, the left arm...
Three inches shorter than his right arm.
True or false?
Um, that is true. That is true.
- It IS true, Bill.
- It is true.
It is quite true.
Well done, Bill!
- Syd!
- Yes?
Lovely Syd. Sitting over there.
Can you see me, Syd?
Yes, yes, yes.
I tell you what...
Via the gift of television, we can
Syd sees through his eyes, there.
Syd!
Can you see us?
Syd, over here!
Over here, Syd! Can you see us?
Over here!
Have you got us?
- Very good, yes.
- Just vague shadows, really, isn't it?
So if you'd like to use your ears, Syd,
we might get somewhere.
Syd, true or false. When filming in Japan,
Jeremy Beadle was mistaken
for a type of giant toad...
...and was locked in a zoological
science lab for 14 minutes...
...before being rescued by his film crew.
True or false?
False!
- It's false!
- It IS false!
Pretty close to it being true.
Well done.
Ulrika.
You know Wolf of 'Gladiators'?
Is he a REAL wolf?
- Do the question.
- Well, I'll do the question, Ulrika.
Ulrika. Marlon Brando's occupation on
his passport is Shepard. True or false?
- False?
- "False?"
I'm sorry Ulrika, it's true.
See? I'm gonna lose.
God, you are husky tonight.
I guess I should be surprised
there isn't a sleigh behind you.
I know!
Can we carry on? Stop it, Bob!
- What did I do!?
- Just behave yourself!
I'm just showing you me tonsils.
Mark! Here's your question. Lovely Mark,
the team captain for Team A.
Can I just interrupt you, there...
- ...for a second, Vic?
- Yes.
Mark, what did you put down
for your passport?
50's throwback.
This joke really will not die, will it?
This '50's throwback' thing?
- No, it won't.
- Well, what did you put down?
You two, dressed up like a couple of extras
from 'Oliver's', and Victorian pounces.
And you...
Your haircut's the same as mine, Reeves!
- Mark?
- I think not!
- Mark there's a lot of...
- I do not put ghee in my hair!
Mark. Here's your lovely question.
Mark, Richard Branson was teased
as a child because of his beard.
True or false?
True.
- What?
- True.
No, it's false.
- It's a false beard.
- It was a false beard? Yes, well done.
Eddie. True or false?
Cliff Richard is gay.
- Come on.
- Ey?
- You can't ask him that!
- What?
- You can't say that!
- Oh, I'll do another one, sorry Eddie!
Eddie. True or false?
O.J. Simpson is a murderer.
You can't say these questions!
- Ask him the proper one.
- All right!
- Ask him the proper question!
- Here it comes. Eddie?
Eddie? Jimmy Nail was the lead singer
in Lindisfarne. True or false?
Oh, that is... That is false.
It IS false! He was not the singer
lead in Lindisfarne. Well done, Eddie!
Leslie. Here's your question.
I think you ARE looking
lovely tonight, love.
Leslie.
I hope you get this one right, actually.
Rosanne Barr, broke a rabbits' neck,
when she put it in the washing machine,
because its feet where dirty. True or false?
False.
- It's true!
- True.
No, it is! It's true.
Poor little... Poor little rabbit!
Leslie? Leslie...
Poor little rabbit!
Leslie, he's trying to prove to you
that he's cute.
- I'm cuter than you!
- No, you're not.
I think I... You'd find that I'm...
- Who's cuter, Ulrika, me or him?
- I'm cuter than you!
Who's cuter, Ulrika. Me or Jim?
Well, that's the end of the
'True or false' round,
which leads us to say:
What are the scores, George Dawes?
No, no. Please.
And, Mark Lamarr's team have got one point.
And Ulrika Jonsson's team,
they've got two points.
Well done!
Now, the next round
is called 'The clips round'.
Because, we're gonna show some clips
to the teams and ask them questions
about that clip. And the first clip
is for you, Mark.
Thank you, Moira.
Later, we'll be bringing you up to date
on the most wanted, and perhaps
the most dangerous man in Britain. How he
got away, and did the Police blunder?
That's a funny clip, isn't it?
But Mark, AND your team...
And you can confer on this one.
Can you name three pop stars
who have played criminals and most
wanted men in the movies?
Eh, yes, erm... The Who.
- Roger Daltrey?
- Roger Daltrey.
- McVicar.
- Errrmmm...
- And the two Kemp chaps in 'The Krays'.
- Oh, yes.
- That's right, The Krays.
- Oooh, four.
- Oh, that's three.
- That's four.
- Three.
- Four?
- The two.
- Oh? Well done!
Well done, Mark.
Team B. Here's your clip.
Take a look at this.
He's had a stroke.
Reckoned it was something like that.
Is that all you can do, James?
Could you tell me what happened next?
- Oh...
- Uh, the...
The... Dog produced puppies?
- Ah, very good answer!
- That's a nice answer.
Is that your final answer?
Anyone wanna go?
Go on, you have... You have a go.
Uh... It DIDN'T produce puppies.
Okay. Let's take a look and see
what happened.
Is that all you can do, James?
He's not in pain. He's quite comfortable.
Yes...
And THEN it produced puppies, yes.
James then had a little Tommy-squeaker,
and the dog fled.
Not altogether, the fairer question,
so I'll offer you this one.
Which newspaper did Christopher Timothy,
whom we saw there,
which newspaper did he advertise?
- Come on.
- Come on, there's a newspaper...
- I'll give you that as a clue.
- The Sun.
"The Sun" is the correct answer!
The correct... Answer!
- Syd?
- Yes!
- Syd? Whoa!
- That's me!
- Syd? Can you see us?
- Nice to see you!
Syd, what newspaper do YOU read?
The Sun, yes, yes.
- You read 'The Sun'?
- Oh, yes.
D'you not find that if the Sun,
the REAL Sun...
That's why I wear glasses.
Well, if it's behind you, does it not burn
a couple of holes into the newspaper?
Right! Of course, it doesn't.
Bill?
Bill? Do you take any...
He looks a bit distracted
at the moment, but he is!
Bill? You must have... You know, all
those long hours you spend in a hide.
Yes.
You must have some publication taken
there to relieve your... The...
- To relieve the boredom?
- Ehm...
You haven't got any watches,
have you, there?
- Birdwatch Magazine...
- Birdwatch Magazine...
That's a very good...
What's going on over there!? Oi!
Oi!
- Can I wear it?
- Yeah, you're all right.
- Two guineas.
- Two guineas?
What's going on over here!?
- No ration cards!
- I'm just getting some of Mark's gear.
It's top gear.
Will you put that stuff away?
I've told you: No selling of that s...
Whatever you keep in the back
of your turnip van.
Hey Vic, you can shout, but some...
But look, I've got a Raul Jax watch, here.
Look a that! How beautiful.
- Will you put it away?!
- It's worth about two...
What where you doing,
buying stuff of him, for?!
- He says it worth two grand.
- You must be stupid!!!
At least, I'm not attractive.
Well, it's that time of the evening where...
We do the...
It's that time of the evening, Vic,
where we do the impressions round.
- Oh!
- Yeah! Oh, yes!
So called because, uhm... Mister Vic Reeves
and myself do impressions of celebrities...
- Very good impressions!
- Well...
And you have to guess who it is
we're doing and impression of.
So, if you're ready... Contestants?
Tell me, who is this?
"Would it be, at all possible for you to
clean out the scratching posts,
in the ladies cubicles, please, Laura?"
Lamarr!
Too late, Ulrika. Lamarr.
Chris Barrie.
Chris Barrie!
Oh, yeah!
She wouldn't get that, would she?
- Did you have that, Ulrika?
- I did.
Yeah, you got it just a little bit too late.
- Shame.
- As always.
Ladies and gentlemen, who is this?
"Deirdre. You must have my..."
- Jonsson!
- Large!
Large!
- Large Jonsson?
- It's a large Jonsson!
- Shamir? Shamir?
- Shamir?
I think you're thinking of
a line of cloth.
Samir! Samir!
- Samir!
- It was Samir!
No, at this point, ladies and gentlemen,
we like to an impression in The Club Style.
Because Vic is a very good club singer,
and he's gonna sing a song,
in the style of a... I... Sorry.
Now, at this point...
Every time I see Ulrika's tash, I cough.
Now there, ladies and gentlemen.
For the next impression,
Vic in the club singer style,
is gonna sing a very popular song,
and you must guess what that song is.
So, if you're ready, George Dawes?
Bill Oddie!
"Singing the blues"?
- No.
- No! Sorry. Carry on, George.
Lamarr!
- My Coo Ca Choo.
- My Coo Ca Choo.
Well done, indeed.
And now, let's hear how it should
sound, sung properly.
Thank you, George!
Well, that's half time, and I've got
myself some sandwiches.
- Have you?
- From the outside, there.
- There we go.
- Are you not having anything?
You didn't bother? Oh? Shame.
Leslie...
I've got you something, here,
that I'd like you to open.
I've admired you for a long time,
especially the work...
A lot, a lot of the work you did
on 'The Tube'. And I...
I'm only sorry that it didn't work out
for you and Sir Bob, so...
- You didn't take over...
- Stop that. Vic!
And if you ever do need...
Vic, stop touching yourself!
I'm sorry! Stop rubbing yourself!
I will sit in over here.
You didn't tell her we're through.
Sorry, my dear.
- Thank you!
- It's a pleasure.
I've just about finished my sandwich, Vic.
I don't mind telling you.
Just about finished it. But, I'll leave
it now, 'cause we've better move on
to the next round, which is
The Dove from Above.
So called, because we greet a dove...
...from above.
And if you could join in, contestants?
And give us a little bit of a coo.
Let's bring that dove down from above.
Come on!
There it is. That beautiful Dove from Above.
In all its glory.
What type of dove is that, Bill?
It's a white one.
Actually, I think that is a pigeon.
I think you'll find that it is
the Dove from Above.
It's a pigeon, and try to
rhyme THAT with something!
Well, there's always 'smidgen'.
- If you're swivelling.
- Yeah.
Yeah, hm. Now, the Dove from Above,
that beautiful creature.
Mythical creature, I believe.
Now, written on its flaunt...
- Flounders!
- Flounders!
Written on its flaunts, there,
are categories of questions.
I want you to choose one of those
categories... Mark.
Yeah, they did this in the 50's...
I want you to choose one of those categories,
and we'll ask you a question on it.
Now...
Hidden behind one of these categories
is a special price.
And if you should choose that,
you'll hear this noise:
Eranu!
And if you should answer incorrectly,
you'll hear this noise:
Ouvavu!
So, for the special price, it's:
Eranu!
And for an incorrect answer, it's:
Ouvavu!
So, if that's clear,
I'm gonna go straight to you, Bill.
I'm gonna ask you, Bill,
to choose a category.
I would choose 'Initials', please.
Initials.
Here it is, here.
Bill, name three celebrities who have
the same initial letter
for their Christian name and their surname.
Such as, hmmm, yeah, Arthur Askey.
Marilyn Monroe. Brigitte Bardot...
...and Arthur Askey.
No, no, no, no!
- Oh, oh, oh, no, no!
- Ey?
- Oh, no!
- Okay. Okay.
No, we can't have 'Arthur Askey'.
Come on, Bill.
Uh, Donald Duck.
- Well done!
- Oh, yes!
Syd!
Lovely little Syd, over there.
Here's your question.
Actually, you'd better pick
a category first, don't you?
- Pick one.
- Uh, 'Space'.
- What?
- Space.
- Smegs?
- No, Space.
- Space. Have you got 'Space', there?
- Yeah, there it is.
Here's one for you, Syd.
Scotty, McCoy and...
'Uhuru'...
...where all officers onboard the
star ship Enterprise.
What was each of them responsible for?
Could we try it again?
- We'll know it.
- Captain...? Could you take it...
- That again? Scotty. What was he?
- Well, Scotty, he was the engineer.
Correct. McCoy?
He was the doctor.
"Bones", they used to call him.
Chief medical officer, yes,
I'll give you that one. And...
What?
Nitpicking, now, are we?
- Nitpicking.
- And, finally...
'Uhuru'.
Uh... Oh, she was... Er...
Oh, she pressed the buttons
on the dash... Erm...
Navigation.
- Ey?
- Navigation?
What was that? Communication?
Communication! That's it!
Communication...
There was a hint of 'navigation'
about that, Syd. I don't know.
Ulllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll
rikaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!
If you can still see me through that
moustache, tell me...
What category do you desire?
I desire... Um....
- 'Relatives'
- Relatives?
Have you got that there, Vic?
Here it is.
Look at this picture, Ulrika,
and tell me whose brother is this?
And you can see him in
the shadows behind.
- A bit of a clue there, in the shadow.
- With an axe in his hand.
Any ideas?
- Oh, Crikey!
- It, um...
- I think they'll gonna get it.
- Calvin Klein?
Calvin Klein!?
Ouvavu!
- Ouvavu.
- Ouvavu!
- Hear the 'avuvu', feel the...
- Ouvavu!
- Know that you're wrong!
- Ouvavu!
It could be... Um...
- It could be, Ulrika, but it isn't.
- Ouvavu!
You COULD get counter-off shoes,
but you don't!
You don't know what it is!
Ouvavu!
I'm sorry, you haven't got it,
let's see who it is.
- It's gonna be revealed now...
- Cilla.
It's Bernard Manning!
- Oh, excusez-moi!
- Bernard Manning!
- That's fair!
- A Bernard Manning!
Bernard Manning.
Mark?
You swine!
Here's your... Well, actually, you'd
better pick one first, haven't you?
Pick us... Pick us a category, Mark.
Uh, 'Taxis'.
- Taxis.
- Taxis.
I've got it here. Taxi question
for YOU, Mark.
In 'Carry On Cabby', what was
the name of the rival cab firm,
set up by Hattie Jacques?
Jacques' Cabs.
Ouvavu!
It was 'Glam Cabs'.
- Eddie!
- Yes.
- Eddie!
- Eddie!
Pick a category.
Uh... 'Pubs'.
Pubs.
You got jarred in one all night,
didn't you?
Eddie, name the pubs that feature
in the soaps Coronation Street,
Emmerdale Farm, and Eastenders.
Oh, yes. AND Eastenders.
Eh... Rovers Return.
- Coronation Street.
- Coronation Street.
- Emmerdale; Woolpack.
- Woolpack.
And, eh... The Queen Vic, mate.
The Queen Vic, that's well
answered, there. Well done!
Leslie, pick a category.
Um...
'Characters'.
Characters? And what a lovely
character you've got.
Leslie. What did these
two characters have in common?
And here's a picture of them, here.
Captain Mannering and Arthur Daly.
What do they have in common?
What do they have in COMMON, Leslie?
Leslie, what do they have in common?
If they had anything in common,
what was it?
How would the duo have in common?
He's trying to flog broaches.
- Yeah, every chance.
- Commercials.
- Commercials?
- Commercials.
Ouvavu!
Ulrika Jonsson?
Both have a wife...
...and you never see them.
- Exactly!
- Well done!
- Bravo.
- Well done!
Well done, I say, Ulrika! My word!
Both have a wife who was never
actually seen on film or screen.
That's the end of that round.
So let's go straight over to
George Dawes, and ask:
What are the scores, George Dawes?
And the scores are...
Mark Lamarr's team have got 5 points,
they quite cool dudes...
And Ulrika Jonsson's team,
they got 7 points. Congratulations!
- Well done, Ulrika.
- Well done!
I wonder, this might just be
your night, Ulrika.
Thank you very much, indeed.
It's all gonna be decided on this
final round.
That's right. It's all gonna be
decided on this round, because...
We're going in for the Quick Fire round.
That's right, we're against the clock here.
Now, we don't know how long we've got,
but when the time's over,
you'll hear this noise:
- There we are. So, let's go.
- Let's go ahead with the Quick Fire round.
It's on the buzzers. Please, please please,
we really wanna see those fingers.
- We REALLY wanna see those fingers.
- Wanna see those fingers.
What a lovely finger, Leslie!
Thank you, Vic. Going Straight...
'Going Straight' was the sequel
to which comedy series? Lamarr!
Porridge.
Correct.
Which flowers are associated with
Dame Edna Everage?
Jonsson.
- Gladiolas.
- Correct.
Gladiolas. Which comedian did Neil
Morrissey replace in the comedy...
Ash.
'Men behaving badly', Harry Enfield.
Correct answer, Ash.
What are the names of the two puppets
featured regularly on 'The Big Breakfast'?
Lamarr.
- Zig and Zag.
- Correct.
Name any part of The Queen.
Lamarr.
- Oh, for God's...
- Arms.
No, I'm sorry, it was the nose.
Name me a hairy dog.
- A what?
- Oddie!
A hairy dog? Poodle!
I was thinking about an Alsatian, sorry.
Very close.
How woody is Woody Allen?
Jonsson.
Very.
- No...
- Is the correct answer!
- Is it?!
- Yes, it is.
Oh, blimey!
It appears he becomes very woody!
What does his wife say to him,
the first thing in the morning?
- I don't know.
- "Morning, wood."
Nice one!
Who is the man from Auntie?
Lamarr.
- Ben Elton.
- Correct.
Who is better known as McGinnis and Mead?
Him, and me.
- Correct.
- Correct, Eddie.
And that means, it's the ending of the quiz,
so George Dawes, what are the final scores?
If you guys knew who I was...
And the final scores are:
Mark Lamarr's team have got 9 points,
but Ulrika Jonsson IS the winner,
with 11, goddamned points!
Well done, Ulrika!
I've gotta hand it to you,
you guys are good!
Yeah, you where great!
You guys where good!
- But...
- It's that funny smelling...
Nobody leaves this arena
open hearted, because...
...we've got a special price for you:
It's these David Bowie style, face zigzags.
Now it can be Aladdin Sane-day, every day
of the week, and not just Sundays.
Not just Sundays! You could be
David Bowie, every day of the week.
There you are, Leslie!
Our winner's over here tonight.
Now then...
Ulrika, you're the team captain...
You've got two lovely, hunky fellows
on either side of you.
Which one of you is gonna take
the 'Vibro-sprout challenge'?
I think it's Eddie, as far as I know.
- No, it's...
- Eddie?
Well... As far as I know,
I thought it was Bill.
And, as far as I know,
I think it's you!
Is it me?
- Yeah, go on!
- Is it you?
I don't know!
I don't think he cares who's
gonna come up.
Ulrika! YOU join me to take the
'Vibro-sprout challenge'.
Here we are, Ulrika.
There's the platform, and there's
Bob to tell you all about it.
Hi, Ulrika! You'd like to step
onto the vibro platform...
Now, here, on this, uh... Good book,
here, I have nine sprouts and a radish.
Each sprout represents 10 pounds,
the royal radish: 50 pounds.
Now, you've already got 11 points,
which we've converted into pounds,
that means 11 pounds.
That's right, you've got potentially
140 pounds here on this good book.
Take it in your hand, Ulrika.
We're gonna vibrate you,
whatever sprout or radish remains,
we'll add that to your already won
10 pounds. So... Vic?
- Are we ready to vibrate?
- Three...
- Two...
- Oh, she's lost one!
- Hold your horses!
- Hold a minute.
That'll be terribly unfair. Are you
steady? You have been drinking a bit,
haven't you, Ulrika? You're all right...
There we are. To each one represents
10 pounds, let's see how many are left
after the 20 seconds that's on
the clock now, can we see that?
Yes. So, Vic?
Three... Two... One...
- Go!
- Vibro-sprout!
- Don't let them go!
- Don't let 'em go!
Let go of the radish,
you're on line to score!
We're still... I think...
I can see... Eight radishes...
She's doing well! She's doing very,
very well, she's keeping them central.
- She's keeping them...
- Five...
Four...
Three...
Two...
One...
One, two, three, four, five.
FIVE sprouts! 50 pounds!
That makes a total of 60 pounds!
Good night! Come and join us!
60 pounds!
60 pounds! Can you believe it?
Well done, Ulrika!
Extraordinary!