Shameless (2011–…): Season 8, Episode 11 - A Gallagher Pedicure - full transcript

You again?
Really?

What? What could you possibly
have been doing

more important than
watching the show last week?

Here's what you missed.

Come on, Toto.

Stop following me.

We have the God-given right

to be who we are,

'cause God hates haters.

My friend found you a place.
It's a family shelter.

They'll have a room
for you in two days.

They can take us in two days?

Oh, we've got the tarp
if it rains again.

Why don't you just stay here
for two nights?

Fiona, thank you.

The dude that
fell off your roof?

He's suing you?

"Plaintiff demands judgment
against defendants

in the sum of $6 million"?

Motherfucker.

He murdered my mother.

They let my father out,
I'm moving to Mexico.

It's too bad you are still...

bitter prostitute slave
working for poor people.

If you weren't
such a cunt, madam,

you might be able
to marry well too.

Debbie!

Did you just get
this pic from Kassidi?

I think they got hitched.

♪ Rock music ♪
*SHAMELESS*
Season 08 Episode 11
Title: "A Gallagher Pedicure"

♪♪♪

♪ Think of all
the luck you got ♪

♪ Know that
it's not for naught ♪

♪ You were beaming
once before ♪

♪ But it's not like that
anymore ♪

♪ What is this downside ♪
♪ What is this downside ♪

♪ That you speak of? ♪

♪ What is this feeling ♪

♪ You're so sure of? ♪

♪♪♪

♪♪♪

♪ Round up
the friends you got ♪

♪ Know that
they're not for naught ♪

♪ You were willing
once before ♪

♪ But it's not like that
anymore ♪

♪ What is this downside ♪

♪ That you speak of? ♪

♪ What is this feeling ♪

♪ You're so sure of? ♪

We're married now, silly.

I wanna have 100 baby Carls.

Sure, uh, but maybe
I should finish school.

Kass.

Kass.
Come on.

Hey, how long
you been out here?

A while.

I'm sorry.
I didn't want to bother you.

Sierra, wh-what is it?
What's going on?

They let my dad out.

♪ Soft pop music ♪

♪♪♪

♪ You remind me ♪

♪ Of a love I once had ♪

♪♪♪

♪ Years ago, I thought ♪

♪ I'd never lose control ♪

♪♪♪

I just... I couldn't
be there alone.

Sorry.

Hey, it's all right, okay?

It's all right.

♪♪♪

Mommy.

♪♪♪

Morning.

- How's Debbie?
- Says she's all right.

I'm gonna go pick her up
at the hospital.

- That your lawsuit?
- Yeah. Fuckers.

Morning, Liam.

Liam, you okay?

Well, Carl and Kassidi
were banging all night,

so we didn't get any sleep.

Can't stop love.

Proud of my Carl for
putting a ring on that one.

Little minx is loaded.

Morning.

- Morning.
- Who the hell are you?

Lucas.

My mom is Sierra.

- What are you doing here?
- My mom and me slept here.

What is that, Frank?

The final piece
of my retirement plan.

Chicken livers?

And... my Social Security
benefit package.

Mr., um...

Jerome Wessels
is retiring today.

Who?

Uh, a guy that sat

next to me on the bus
six years ago.

Between my T-shirt business

and a few monthly checks
from Uncle Sam,

I should have a nice retirement,

so long as I get to live with

one of my loving children.

No.

I'd pitch in.

Laundry,
general housekeeping,

like having a live-in maid
who speaks English.

You should just
die now, Frank,

save everyone
a lot of trouble.

Mr. Wessels

will kick in his share.

So will, uh,

Jamie Ramirez

and Mr. Mark Wilcox.

Not a chance.

Seriously? I give you life

and you turn your back on me
in my old age?

You're breaking
the social contract,

the very purpose of family.

In Asian cultures,

the elders are revered.

That's a great idea.
Move to Asia.

You're really
stealing Social Security cards?

No, I just happened
to find these

in a bag of liver
in our freezer.

You really got married?

Well, she was freaking out
about me going back to school.

So your solution
was to marry her?

Things just kinda happened.

Morning, fam.

You're both idiots.

Fiona, can I get
a ride to the church?

Sorry, Ian, I gotta go
to the ER and pick up Debbie,

and then I gotta try to talk
some sense into this asshole

in my apartment who's suing me.

Hey, what happened
to Debbie?

She hurt her foot
last night at work.

Says it's no big deal.

Good luck.

♪ Groovy instrumental music ♪

Gracias, Señor Ramirez.

The trauma doc
stabilized your toes,

but there's a good chance
you're gonna lose them.

It's critical that you
see a surgeon today.

Here's your referral.

They said they can
squeeze you in this afternoon.

Sign here and here.

You'll need these when
the local anesthetic wears off.

Twice a day as needed
for pain.

And here, oh.

I stole this from
the lost and found.

One?

You want two, the hospital
will charge you 120 bucks.

Thanks.

Hi.

- Hey.
- You okay?

Yeah, sure.

This thing fell on my foot.

Does it hurt?

A little. Still pretty numb.

- Thanks for picking me up.
- Yeah.

- Hey, good morning.
- Yeah, morning.

Hey, you guys get
something to eat?

- Yeah.
- Yeah?

- Coffee.
- Right.

Go get your stuff, okay?

Gotta drop you at day camp
before work.

Okay.

I'm sorry for freaking out.

No, don't be.

You can always call me.

When I heard he got paroled,
I...

I couldn't think straight.

I've never been able to get
that night out of my mind.

Yeah, you, uh...

never really told me
what happened.

♪ Solemn minimalistic music ♪

♪♪♪

He came home...

wasted almost every day.

♪♪♪

That night, he found
a towel on the bathroom floor

and started slapping her around.

♪♪♪

Mom was screaming.

He told her to shut up, but...

she didn't.

♪♪♪

So he punched her...

♪♪♪

and kept punching her...

until her face just...

♪♪♪

blood and bones and hair.

♪♪♪

You were there?

Me and Neil, yeah.

♪♪♪

Told us if we ever said a word
to anybody about it,

he'd fucking kill us both.

♪♪♪

Took a blanket
from Neil's bed...

♪♪♪

wrapped Mom up...

and threw her
in a dumpster.

♪♪♪

Policewoman gave us Cokes.

We never got Cokes.

♪♪♪

How old were you?

Ten.

♪♪♪

We testified against him,

both of us.

♪♪♪

And they just let him out.

♪♪♪

Can you go to my apartment
with me later

to pick up a few things?

- Yeah, of course.
- Thank you.

I'm sorry.

♪♪♪

Dude, it's really him.

Hi.

Hey, Ian.
Thank you so much.

This is Bic.
He wants to help.

Hey.

What the hell is this?

Your life
is no longer your own.

Please, my dad's
trying to kidnap me!

He hired men to take me.
Please!

Please, my dad's trying
to kidnap me!

Be patient!
We'll be opening soon!

Hello? Rodney?
It's Fiona.

- ♪ Rock music ♪
- I know you're in there.

Rodney, Trina?

♪♪♪

Let's just talk, please,
like adults.

♪♪♪

Open the door, please.
I need to get my dog.

This is stupid.
I was fair to you.

I let you stay in my apartment
and you sue me?

Why am I the bad guy?

Hey. Rusty?

Have you guys been feeding him?
Is there water in his bowl?

I will kill you
with my bare fucking hands.

Okay. That's fair warning.

I am the owner. I have a right
to enter these premises.

I'm coming in.

♪♪♪

Are the locks changed?

This is my apartment.
Hello!

Did you change the locks
on my apartment?

What?

Oh. Sorry. Sure.

I'm coming right out.

There had better be water
in his bowl.

♪♪♪

- Hmm.
- Is that bad?

I mean, they're roofers,
right?

You would think the one thing
they'd know how to do

- is not fall off.
- Um.

- I am covered, right?
- Uh-huh.

Minimum liability
up to half a million.

Half a million?

They're suing me
for six million.

People rarely get
what they're asking for.

We settle almost all of these.

- Well, that's good, then.
- Could be.

In any case, your contractor's
on the hook for it.

We're gonna go after
his insurance company.

You got the contractor's info?

Uh, yeah, cell phone number.

That's all you've got?

Yeah. Why?

I don't think there's
any skin left on my dick.

I just can't get enough
of my husband.

I need more Carl.

I wanna know
everything about you.

Remember when you said
that you and Ian...

You guys ran away
from that foster home

and lived under the bridge?

Did that really happen?

Yeah.

- Show me.
- What?

Your life.

Uh, where... where you lived
under the bridge,

where you sold your drugs,

where that guy chased you
with a hatchet.

I wanna see it all.

I mean, I am
Mrs. Carl Gallagher now.

I need to know
the life you lived.

Come on. I'll rub lotion
on your dick and we'll go.

We can't just keep attacking
people doing these conversions.

We need to bring lan's message
directly to the disenfranchised,

- wherever they are.
- Oh, you're saying we should

preach in gay nightclubs?

Why not, hmm?
Nightclubs, street corners.

Ian, two big dudes
just showed up.

They're trying to take
one of the kids.

♪ Driving Rock music ♪

♪♪♪

Hey! Hey!

Wait! Wait!

Stop!

What are you doing?

Look out!

♪♪♪

- Now what?
- Get down.

Everyone down.

♪♪♪

♪♪♪

He's out!

♪♪♪

♪♪♪

♪♪♪

Hey, morning.

Hey, uh, why don't you
go grab a broom?

♪♪

- Morning.
- Morning.

♪♪♪

Um...

hey, any sign of Xan's mom?

I'm giving my shit-bag
half sister two more days.

Well, she seems like
a really good kid.

There's nothing wrong
with the kid.

Just didn't sign up
for one, you know?

Right.

Hey, um, Brad's delivering
that Fatboy,

and, uh, I gotta run out
somewhere at lunch.

- Can you cover?
- You doing a meeting?

No. That, uh, friend of mine,
you know, Sierra?

♪♪♪

Well, her old man
just got out of prison.

Her and her kid, they've been
staying with me for a few days.

Told her I'd go by her place,

help her pick up a few things.

♪♪♪

You and the fucking drama.

♪♪♪

You gotta be kidding me, right?

So you think you can get
your roof fixed for $500

from a guy that's got insurance?

- Come on.
- You don't have insurance?

Hey, I do honest work,

and I pay my men exactly
what I say I'm gonna pay 'em.

There's always some asshole

gaming the system,
saying, "Oh, I'm hurt."

He's got pins in his ankle.

I think it's fair to say
that he's hurt.

He fell.
Whose fault is that?

Fuck him.
Let him sue me.

The only thing I own
in this world is that truck.

He'll have to kill me to get it.

♪♪

Wow.

This fucking place, huh?

I found it on
Belarusian whore website.

More billionaires stay here
than any other hotel in Chicago.

♪♪♪

What are you doing?

Comparing my skills
to those of Freelania.

These are my skills on this
napkin, and these are hers.

There's nothing
on that napkin.

Hmm, precisely.

She is sub-mental.

Not as attractive,
not as charming.

Look at my ass.
It's perfect.

I would fuck
my own ass.

She has flat ass
of Filipino boy.

♪♪♪

$28 for a vodka tonic?

$18 for a beer.

You'd have to be a billionaire
to catch a buzz.

♪♪♪

Hey...

I think that guy at the end
of the bar wants to talk.

Bring him over.

♪♪♪

- Hey, how you doing?
- Hey.

We are having
a little party upstairs.

Great, I'm Kevin Ball...

We-we just need
the chocolate one.

A thousand for the hour.

The chocolate...

V? That's my wife.

Fifteen hundred.
Two thousand if it runs over.

Look, pal, my wife isn't...
$2,000?

♪♪♪

Three thousand.

I mean, look, she's worth it,

but you should really
meet the other one.

Crazy in bed, and...

she knows accounting.

Let me invite her over.

Hey, we're not hiring
a bookkeeper.

Four grand for the black one.
Final offer.

♪♪♪

So? Did you get her a date?
Why didn't you invite him over?

They prefer you.

You explained we're married
and Svet's single?

The guy offered me $4,000
for an hour with you.

Hmm.

- He thinks I'm a whore?
- Of course.

No, it-it's just
a misunderstanding, V.

- That's all.
- Oh.

$4,000?

V...

No...
Look, I'm sorry,

but damn,
that's a lot of money.

♪♪♪

And it's not like
the guy is ugly.

- V!
- Good afternoon.

Oh, good afternoon.

- I am Aviv Ben Yellin.
- I am Svetlana Yevgenivna.

These are my friends
Veronica and Kevin Von Ball.

- Please, join us.
- Thank you.

Regrettably, I can't
accept your invitation.

I'm director of hotel security,

and it is my unfortunate duty
to inform you

that the hotel has a strict
"no prostitution" policy.

We're not prostitutes.

No, no, no, they are,
those whores at the bar.

Like you don't know.
Please.

♪♪♪

Let's go to the Ritz.

No.

No more.
I think I know what to do.

I need to go humble myself
before that slut Freelania

and see how she managed
such a miracle.

- Four thousand?
- Dollars.

I can't believe
that you lived down here.

It's like freakin' Mad Max.

Yeah, I remember
this one time,

a guy tried to steal
Ian's coat.

We beat him with a can of tuna
wrapped in a tube sock.

That's so hot.

Think it's over here.

Oh, my God,
you lived there?

- Yeah.
- I have to see it.

Hey! You okay?

Oh, hey, man.
Sorry, didn't realize

someone was sleeping here.

Hello?

Is he dead?
Is that a dead body?

Hey, come on,
let's just get out of here.

I've gotta Snapchat this.

Uh, it's just a dead guy.
Let's go.

- Roll him over.
- What?

So I can see
the face of death.

Oh, Kassidi, come on.

Carl, roll him over.

♪ Upbeat music ♪

I'm gonna story
the shit out of this.

♪♪♪

♪ Making my mark ♪

♪ Get it done,
get it, get it ♪

♪ Working real hard ♪

♪ Till we done did it,
did it ♪

♪ Breezing through the city
like hello ♪

♪ Like nothing gonna
stop me... ♪

The fuck?

♪ Everybody want
a little piece of the action ♪

♪ Try to show up ♪

♪ Let's talk,
make it happen ♪

♪ Going all in
'cause I can't fail ♪

Number nine?

♪ Don't you know
the devil's in the details? ♪

♪ There's no question,
no, there's no question... ♪

Number nine?

♪ No, no, no, no, no ♪

♪ There's no question,
no, there's no question... ♪

Hi.

I'm retiring.

I'd like to start receiving
my Social Security benefits.

Hmm.

I'm sorry, Mr. Wessels.

It says here you're already
collecting your benefit.

What? How can that be?

Are you suggesting someone
has stolen my identity,

committing fraud?

It's a possibility, yes.

Oh, my God.

I'm number nine. Sorry.

I was in the bathroom.

Prostate, you know.

Size of a basketball.

Hi. I'd like to start
my benefits.

♪♪♪

Um... Mr. Ramirez?

It says here you're dead.

♪♪♪

Uh, I'm-I'm number nine.

Hi.

Can you...

tell me what my
benefits would be

if I were to retire right now?

Of course.

Um, Mr. Gallagher,
it says here

you only worked six weeks
your entire life.

Well...

if you mean a "formal job,"
yes, but I...

I've had various enterprises

that contributed significantly
to the economy.

Mm-hmm.

Well, as it stands,

this will be your
monthly benefit.

♪♪♪

Three dollars and 42 cents?

Gee. That's not a lot, is it?

- Sorry.
- A guy works his whole life.

♪ No, there ain't no doubt
I was born for this ♪

How's the pain?

It's starting to hurt a little.

The trauma doc was inclined
to amputate,

which may have been warranted.

All three toes
are severely damaged,

crushed, for lack
of a better word.

There's not enough
blood circulating

to ensure
they won't go necrotic.

- W-what does that mean?
- Die.

And if your toes die,
then you're talking gangrene,

and next thing you know,
you lose your leg.

But you can fix 'em, right?

Surgery's only
part of the process.

You'll be off your feet
for months,

and then at least year
of physical therapy.

A year?

I-I can't...

Well, what would
the surgery cost?

It'll run you
at least $50,000.

Holy shit.

For three toes?

W-what happens
if I can't afford the surgery?

- I just die?
- No. We remove the toes,

and then you're back on
your feet in a couple of days.

Costs $6,000, $7,000.

You'll be a little wobbly
at first.

Need a special shoe.

Let me know what you decide.

Well, why is it
so important for you to know

what it's like
to live on the street?

'Cause you grew up free.
I grew up trapped

in an 8,000-square-foot
suburban prison.

Cable fucking TV,

cheerleading camp,
cross country,

and Mom always
ragging on me to study.

And for what?
So I could end up like them?

I mean, they're miserable.
Please.

Well, this is it.

This is where my first shop was.

Selling crack?
That is so cool.

Yo, you gotta buy or walk.

This is my corner.

I used to work this corner.

Where's G-Dog?

That's his brains
right there...

that dark spot.

Damn!

Shooter! Down!

Get down!

Oh, my God!

They shot at us!

This is epic!

- Hey. Ready?
- Hey.

Yeah.
I'm going on my break.

Thanks for coming with me.
I-I know it's stupid,

but I keep thinking
he could be trying to find me.

Right.

Um...

why don't you tell me what
you need from the apartment?

I'll just go get it.

No, I can't let you do that.

Look, nothing's gonna
happen, all right?

It's not a big deal.

Look, y-you got
a picture of him?

You know, if I see him
hanging around your place,

we'll go to the cops

and get a restraining
order or something.

Only photo I have
is pretty old.

Okay.

Hey, they tell you
where they paroled him to?

Some halfway house
over on Seventh.

Okay.

I'll make a list of stuff
that I need from the apartment.

Yeah. Yeah, yeah, cool.

Hey. What are you doing?

Googling St. Croix.

- What's that?
- Some island.

I'm gonna go yachting there.

Right.

Hey, Google something
for me, will ya?

Sure.

Google "do you need your toes?"

Please.

What do you plan
to do with him?

We'll find
someplace for him.

The father has a legal right

- to take his son. Uh...
- The kid's still a minor.

Just 'cause it's legal
doesn't make it right.

Ian, I feel like
part of my role here

is to make sure
you understand

the realities of what
we're getting into.

You... we are harboring

a runaway 14-year-old.

Legally, you have no standing
as his protector or guardian.

Then who will protect him?

Are you saying
we shouldn't be helping people

just 'cause
it could be dangerous?

'Cause if so,
what the hell are we doing here?

It's not your place...

Blake's old man is here.

He wants to talk to you.

You think we're horrible for
trying to kidnap our own child.

But we will do
anything to save him.

So please, give him back to us
so we can get him help.

We're not bigots.

We love our son.

We don't think Blake
needs to be heterosexual

to be a good person.

But he's living on the streets,
he's using drugs,

and I know that he's...

prostituting himself.

He's out of control.

We think...

We believe he may be
mentally ill.

So you let them stay
in your apartment?

- Well, yeah.
- You shouldn't have done that.

- Why?
- Because

that's an admission
of responsibility.

But I-I didn't
do anything wrong.

Your contractor
had no insurance.

You only have a half a million
in liability.

S-so what's the worst case?

You lose in court

and your insurance
pays out 500,000.

That leaves you
owing 5.5 million.

Other assets?
Well, you sell your building.

You got about 50 grand
in equity there.

And, uh... and your
family home is worth,

um, I don't know, maybe 62?

So that leaves you only
owing this Rodney asshole

$5,388,000...

forever.

The jury's gonna take
one look at that man

and his starving family

and the slumlord bitch
that ruined their lives

by hiring
an unlicensed contractor,

and you're gonna be lucky
if they don't put you in jail.

He spoils me,

but I deserve it.

He likes his little penis
rubbed, and honestly,

all he really cares about
are my feet.

He can't stop buying me shoes.

Such a simple man.

Oh.
Vera made this for me.

Mazel tov.

I must admit,

the greater part
of the joy I feel

is knowing how devastated
you must be.

Humiliated.

I had imagined you
humbled like this

so many times.

I was worried it would be
anticlimactic.

- It's not.
- Freelania...

you have everything
we have ever dreamed of.

After all the tubs
of hand lotion

and stained sheets,

thousands of Handi Wipes,

I am truly humbled
by your success,

so I ask you to pity me
and tell me how.

How did you make
this all happen?

You mean how did
these shoes happen?

Yes.

How did this Gaultier gown,

which I have never worn,
happen?

Uh-huh.

I would give it to you
now that it's soiled, but...

you're too fat
to fit into it,

so I will
throw it away instead.

Svetlana Yevgenivna,

you were born a whore.

You will die a whore.

Mm. My caterer.

Excuse me.

Alain...

Bonjour, mon amour.

Ublyudok.

Hello, hello.

Hello, sweetie.

Don't you look lovely...

today?

I'm headed for the club.

Don't forget
dinner at The Grill.

I wanna show off
my beautiful bride-to-be.

Hmm.

Toodle-oo.

I'm going up the chimney.

I have investigated

every possible
retirement scenario,

and they all lead
to homelessness,

hunger,

despair, and decrepitude.

How's that any different than
how you live right now,

- Frank?
- It's as if we think

the elderly are
irrelevant, disposable.

My own children have said

they won't care for me
in old age.

What does tell you
about the decline

of Western civilization?

That you didn't raise
any fools.

I believe that Alzheimer's

is an evolutionary advantage
that we've developed

so we won't have to be aware
of the depth of misery

we face in our dotage.

And yet...

here I am...

as loose as the day
I was born.

Retirement
is for rich people.

My old man was at GM
for 40 years.

Six months short
of retirement,

the pension fund
went tits up.

Forty years
and dick to show for it.

- But he got lucky.
- How's that?

Well, he died on the line.

Keeled over into
the stamping machine.

Got pressed into a rear fender
for a Buick Skylark.

Never even stopped the line.

How's that lucky?

Well, he didn't have
to worry about retiring.

Ah...

Fucking A,
this one's to the workingman.

Fucking A to the workingman.

♪ Slow, grungy music ♪

♪♪♪

Talked to your dad.

Says you're using.

Sometimes.

You're selling yourself?

♪♪♪

You can't be living
on the street.

It's dangerous.

I can't go home.

When I came out,
they lost it.

He says that they're okay
with you being gay.

That's bullshit.

They put me into therapy,

three days a week.

Started going to a church

where this asshole
was always talking about

sodomy and God's will.

♪♪♪

They wanna lock me up
with other kids

whose parents don't wanna deal
with who their kids really are.

♪♪♪

He says your therapist thinks
you may be mentally ill.

♪♪♪

They put me on these drugs,

knocked me on my ass.

I couldn't even get out of bed.

♪♪♪

I couldn't get an erection.

That's what they really want,

so that I can't have sex
with another boy, you know?

Ever.

♪♪♪

Well...

you can't stay here.

We have to find someplace

where you can be safe,
where you can be yourself.

So you'll help me?

♪♪♪

This is it, first group home.

John McKimmey chased me
around the basement

with a hatchet
on his birthday.

Carl?

- Benson?
- Hey, man.

Hey.

This is my wife, Kassidi.
This is Benson.

- We used to live here together.
- Well, I still do.

Oh, no shit.

Yeah, nobody ever claimed me.

Oh, wow, I'm sorry, man.

How long have you
lived here for?

My whole life.

My mom left me in a dumpster
behind the Save-A-Lot

when I was a baby.

Heard you were in the army
or some shit.

Yeah, I'm a cadet corporal

over at Millberry
Military Academy.

That's dope. Wow.

What are you doing back here?

I came home for the summer.

I go back in a week.

Man, you got
it all figured out.

Well, I gotta get back
before they put lunch away.

Snackables today.

I love those little
cheese wedges.

- Well, later.
- All right.

Hey, baby, wait!

- Kassidi!
- I'm sick of all your shit!

Kassidi, wait up!

Frank, can I please
go yachting

in the Caribbean
with Dylan's family?

Son...

now is not the time
to badger your father.

I'm a little preoccupied with

coming up with several
hundred thousand dollars

so that my retirement

can have a modicum of...

Yachting?

I've always wanted
to ride a Jet Ski.

Dylan said I could use
the yellow one.

Did he?

Well, look at that.

You know, the Caribbean's
far from here,

past Florida,
way down there.

They have their own jet,

so we can fly there
and then yacht around.

Wow, that's impressive.

What does Dylan's father do

that he has a yacht
and a private plane?

Finance. Dylan said
I could do it someday

because I'm good at math.

So you'd be gone, what,

- a couple weeks?
- Yeah. Can I go?

Yes, well...

uh, fun or no fun,
I am your father,

and I am responsible
for your safety.

I gotta meet his parents

before I'm going
to give my permission.

I'm not just gonna
turn you over to a stranger.

I mean, he could be a...

drug lord...

or a congressman.

I'll text him right now.

Kassidi, don't!

Kassidi, I love you! Come on!

Just forget about it, Carl!

Forget about me.
Forget about us.

I'm going home.
We'll just... we'll get a divorce.

I mean, what do you care?
You're leaving me anyway.

Leave or die, fucker!
Come on!

I thought you would
be okay with me

going back to school now
'cause we're married!

I will never be okay
with being away from you, bae!

Never!

Okay.

Okay.

I won't go.

I won't ever go back to school.
I'll stay here with you.

No one is ever gonna love you
as hard as I do, Carl Gallagher.

Remember that.

No one.

I love you! I love you!
I love you!

Frank, listen, I get it.

I was raised in Camden.

My old man taught junior high.

We ate Spaghettios
out of a can.

Only way to eat Spaghettios!

I didn't have a TV in my room
until I was 12.

So when Dylan told me
he wanted to invite

one of the less fortunate
kids from school,

I told Carrie,
"Hey, why not?"

You'd be a great role model
for him, Andrew.

Well, thanks, Frank.

And I'm sure
you're a terrific dad.

Well...

Honestly, I'm surprised
you wanted to meet.

Most of these parents,
they would've just

shipped their kid off
without a phone call.

Doesn't sound
very responsible,

if you ask me.

That's a nice sword.

Harumaki, early Edo.

Paid nearly half a million
for that outfit.

Those Samurai,

tiny dudes.

That helmet?
Couldn't even fit on my dick.

Andrew, I-I truly appreciate
your generosity.

Well, Frank,
being poor isn't a sin.

It just sucks, am I right?

Suck it does.

That's a pretty cool cowboy.

Looks so real.

Remington.

That son of a bitch ran me
a million and a half.

Stop.

But you know what?
Worth it.

That bastard's running
all out.

I like it.

I like to think
of myself that way.

Instead of a pony,
I ride the market, balls out.

- Nobody's gonna give it to ya.
- No, they will not.

You gotta reach out
and take it.

No truer words
were ever spoken.

Yippee-ki-yay.

You're doing the right thing
trying to suggest a compromise.

It's gonna be my final offer,
I swear to God.

You could pump
just enough carbon monoxide

into the apartment
to give 'em all brain damage.

What'll you do
if they don't go for it?

I'll settle it,
with a shotgun.

You don't wanna act in anger.

'Cause if you gas 'em
just right,

then they'd all wander
around like zombies

and probably never even
remember to go to court.

- Not helpful.
- Christ, you're boring.

I hope our kid
isn't as boring as you.

Hi.

Trina, let's talk.

- Really?
- Easy.

Don't let her get
under your skin.

Come on, let's handle this
like adults.

Drop the suit,

and you can live here
rent-free for a year.

I'll even pay your
hospital expenses.

That way, Rodney will have time
to get back on his feet

and get a job.

That's fair, right?
That's more than fair.

I haven't done anything wrong.

I'll even buy you groceries.

Hey.

Down!

Rusty?

Hey! Fuck all of you!

Give me my goddamn dog!

Rusty!

They are going down.

Fuck!

Hey, what's going on, man?

- Hey. Hey, man.
- Can I help you?

Yeah, you, uh... you got a square?

- Yeah.
- Oh, thanks.

Mm-hmm.

Oh, perfect.

A light?

- Thanks.
- Mm-hmm.

Hey, you, um...

you're Norman, right?

Do I know you?

No, I'm a friend of the family.

Fuck off.

Hey, um...

but is it... is it true
that you like to beat women?

You know,
'cause where I'm from,

guys that beat woman,

well, they're bitches, right,

so I guess what I'm asking is,

I mean, is that true?

Are you a little bitch?

♪ Distorted
electric guitar riff ♪

No, I mean, are you
a little bitch woman beater...

♪ Bouncy Rock music ♪

Fucking kill you,
you motherfucker!

Ah!

You're a dead man, motherfucker!

Let go!

You're fucking dead!

I'll fucking kill you,
you motherfucker! You hear me?

You're a dead man, motherfucker!

A fucking dead man!

♪♪♪

- How'd we do?
- He swung first.

Oh, yeah? Let me see.

All right. That's excellent.
That's excellent, all right?

Uh, yeah, I'd like
to report an assault.

You hear that?

Drop the lawsuit,
I'll let you out.

Or starve. Your choice.

I feel like I'm finally
getting to know the real Fiona.

Foghat?

It's a classic.

It was either this
or "Yellow Brick Road."

♪♪♪

Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.

Here.

I've never been
an accomplice before.

Enjoy the shit-filled toilets,
you fuckers!

♪ 'Cause I'm a fool
for the city ♪

♪ I'm a fool for the city... ♪

♪♪♪

Mom, that lady's
stealing Sparkles!

Take him!

- Take him!
- I gotcha.

♪ I ain't no country boy... ♪

Ha-ha-ha!
Is this fun or what?

Ha-ha!

♪ I'm a fool for the city ♪

♪ I'm a fool
for the city ♪

♪ I'm a fool for the city ♪

♪ I'm a fool for the city ♪

♪ I'm a fool
for the city ♪

♪ A crazy fool ♪

♪ Fool for the city ♪

♪ I'm a fool for the city ♪

♪ Fool for the city ♪

♪ La-la-la-la, la-la-la-la ♪

♪ La-la-la-la,
la-la-la-la ♪

♪ upbeat pop music ♪

♪ La-la-la-la, la-la-la-la... ♪

♪♪♪

Whoa.

Okay, just how we practiced.

Start with the little one.
Cut at the joint.

Once you start, do not stop
until you cut off all three.

Go wash your hands again.

♪♪♪

♪ I know it's coming ♪

♪ I can see it
in your eyes now... ♪

Ugh.

♪ Oh-oh-oh ♪

Ugh.

♪ ...no surprise now... ♪

Okay.

If I pass out, keep going.

Do not forget to call 911.

Ow! Fuck!

Ugh!

Mm!

Okay. Let's do this.

♪♪♪

♪ I know you crave it... ♪

- ♪ So what ya waiting for? ♪
- Do it!

Oh, ho, ho, ho!

♪ So what ya, what ya ♪
♪ La-la-la-la, la-la-la-la ♪

♪ What ya waiting for... ♪
♪ La-la-la-la, la-la-la-la ♪

- ♪ La-la-la-la, la-la-la-la ♪
- Shit!

Liam!

♪♪♪

♪ What ya waiting for? ♪

♪ I got a feeling
you'll be ready ♪

♪ When it goes down... ♪

Oh, fuck me.

♪ 'Cause I got a fire
and it never ever goes out... ♪

Liam!

I had a wonderful visit

with Dylan's father.

♪ There's only one way
this can go ♪

♪ What ya waiting for? ♪

♪ I know you like it ♪

♪ I know you do ♪

♪♪♪

♪ I know you crave it ♪

♪ I know what you want,
know what you want ♪

♪ So what ya waiting for? ♪

♪ La-la-la-la, la-la-la-la ♪

♪ So what ya, what ya ♪

♪ La-la-la-la, la-la-la-la ♪

♪ What ya waiting for? ♪

♪ La-la-la-la, la-la-la-la ♪

♪ So what ya, what ya ♪

♪♪♪

♪ What ya waiting for? ♪

♪ Hey! ♪

♪ La-la-la-la, la-la-la-la ♪

♪ La-la-la-la,
la-la-la-la ♪

♪♪♪

♪ So what ya waiting for? ♪

♪ La-la-la-la ♪

♪ I know you like it ♪

♪ Hey! ♪

♪♪♪

♪ So what ya waiting for? ♪

♪ La-la-la-la ♪

♪ I know you like it ♪

♪ La-la-la-la, la-la-la-la ♪

♪ So what ya, what ya ♪

♪ La-la-la-la... ♪

Smells like steak.

♪ La-la-la-la, la-la-la-la ♪

♪ So what ya, what ya ♪

♪♪♪

♪ What ya waiting for? ♪

They're back.

They're never gonna give up.

Get the kid.

Hey.

What? What is it?

What? Mm.

- He's back in jail.
- What?

He got into a fight.
They revoked his probation.

Wow.

What's that?

Uh, it's, uh, nothing.

A wrench slipped at work.

Oh, baby...

A wrench, huh?

Yeah, a wrench.

♪ Slow atmospheric music ♪

♪♪♪

♪♪♪

Jesus, it looks like somebody
sawed them off with a hacksaw.

Work accident.

A pipe fell down
and cut 'em right off.

Did the pipe cauterize them too?

Could you please just
stitch 'em up for me?

I got welding school next week.

♪ Purposeful Rock music ♪

♪♪♪

Son, please.

Blake, I'm only
trying to help you.

I love you, son.

I'm-I'm doing this
for your own good.

My God's a faggot!

♪♪♪

My God's a dyke.

My God is trans,

a junkie, a whore!

♪♪♪

We will not be victims.

♪♪♪

♪♪♪

Jesus.

What do you got in there,
a dead body?

I do not believe
she's dead yet.

♪ Enchanting Rock music ♪

♪♪♪

♪ We're livin' the dream ♪

♪♪♪
Sync corrections by srjanapala