Samurai Rabbit: The Usagi Chronicles (2022–…): Season 2, Episode 4 - Adventures in Ninjasitting - full transcript

All great samurai
have to master meditation.

So time to master.

Hey, chirp somewhere else.
Can't you see I'm trying to meditate?

Spot, you are not helping.

Oh, come on!

I'm doing it! Awesome. So awesome.

Is this enlightenment?
It doesn't feel like enlightenment.

The ground is itchy. I'm hungry.

Shut up, brain.

Samurai are about action.
This is the opposite of action.

This is stupid. Meditation is stupid.



Brain, we're supposed to be a team.

Karasu-Tengu said
meditation was the key to, um,

something important.

Argh.

Fine. You win, brain. Let's go eat.

- I want daifuku.
- You'll spoil your dinner.

- I want daifuku!
- No daifuku till you finish your broccoli.

Hey. I'm going out for some daifuku.

Can I come?

You said "daifuku"
and now I must have daifuku.

It's pretty basic science.

- Something's on me! Is it a spider?
- It's Spot.

Oh.

While you're out, would you two take Hana
to see her old friends at the ninja dojo?



She's been spending so much time
with Auntie, she's starting to act weird.

My back.

Sure thing, Auntie.
Hana, you want to go get some daifuku?

I'll go, but I can't have sweets.
I get such heartburn.

Yeah, she definitely needs more time
with kids her age.

Ahh! What's on me? Is it a spider?

Ugh, they're scaring Kiyoko!

It's okay, they won't hurt you.

Those cats are scary.

All they know is fighting. And they're
costing us a fortune in practice dummies.

Hello.

We brought daifuku.

You can stand down. They're okay.

Hana, where have you been?

Probably on a secret mission.

I was living on a farm
with this nice rabbit with a wooden ear.

Fine. Don't tell us about the mission.

How's it going with the crew, Lady Chizu?

Ugh, this is not
how I wanted my life to go.

I need to get the kids out of here
and into some normal homes, but, ugh...

...they have some bad habits.

Yeah, like assault and grand theft.

I just wish they could see
that there's more to life than the dojo.

Let us take 'em for a while.

I'm great with kids,
'cause, you know, I'm so mature.

Usagi, you keep syrup in your pockets.

Right. So I'm always prepared.

It's worth a try.
Hana, you and the others go with Usagi.

Come on. We'll get you all un-ninja'd.

Okay, who hit me with a throwing star?

Hey, I was thinking
maybe dancing would be a good way

for the ninja
to work off some of that energy.

You want them to dance?

Have you ever met a ninja?

Wow. You are not
open to new ideas at all, are you?

What? Of course I am.

Ha-ha! Every single idea
I've mentioned you've shot down.

You're totally closed off.

I am not! I love new ideas.

I listen to new ideas all the time.

Hello, new leader of the ninja!

I have some ideas for you!

Yeah, she's not into...

I would love to hear your ideas,
Lord Kogane.

Hi there, ninja.
I have some news for all of you.

Everyone finds you terrifying.

- Mission accomplished.
- Finally!

- Good job!
- Yes!

No, no, no! That's not good! It's bad!
We need to change your image.

So my big idea is this.

We're going to rebrand you.

Well, hmm. Okay, yeah, this is a new idea.

And I like it, because I like new ideas.

So how can we change how people see us?

Well, to start,
instead of the "Neko Ninja Crew,"

you will be called
"Lord Kogane's Dream Team"!

Tell me again how much you love ideas.

A lot. I love them a lot.

Lady Chizu, shall we eliminate him?

- Absolutely not!
- Lady Fuwa would have let us.

Now, let's get your image cleaned up,
shall we?

I say we start with...

...sequins!

Sequins?

All right, we're going to learn to
do stuff for people instead of to people.

Let's start with a classic good deed.
Helping someone cross the street.

We do as commanded.

Okay, maybe skip that lesson.

Um, another good deed
is rescuing pets who are stuck in trees.

Yep. Spot says that tokage is stuck.

Now, climb the tree gently
so you don't scare it and...

Huh?

Well, that was unnecessarily forceful.

It's out of the tree.

But let's maybe try something else.

No, no, I live that way! That way!

I just told them to carry
people's bags for them. Are they...

Stealing 'em? Yeah.

When Lady Fuwa wanted us to settle down,
she had us meditate.

Pfft. That's ridiculous.
Only super old people can meditate.

Nah, we do it all the time. It's easy.

You just stop doing anything
that isn't meditating.

Huh.

That weirdly makes sense.

My vegetable cart!

- Ugh.
- Huh. Most kids don't like vegetables.

Kids, put it down! Oh...

Now, let's talk about
how to fix your image problem.

Obviously, the key is

new ninja outfits!

I like the puffy one.

It's huggable and says,
"Look, I'm not evil. I'm cuddly."

Which do you love the most?
Puppy, fuzzy, sparkly?

- Lord Ko...
- Pfft. Like I care about your opinion.

Anyway, instead of swords,

I'm going to have the ninja
carry a new invention of mine.

Ha!

A balloon?

No.

Balloon origami!

I don't want to brag, but I am a certified
ninth-degree origami master.

Now, here is my vision
for Lord Kogane's Dream Team.

I see you as a force for good in Neo Edo.

These new ninja will distribute joy
to the people of the city

in the form of balloon origami.

I will supply the materials myself
at only a slight markup.

And they will also distribute educational
pamphlets on a variety of subjects,

with titles like
The Many Hobbies of Lord Kogane,

Your Buddy, Lord Kogane,

and Lord Kogane: History's Greatest Hero
or the World's Foremost Genius.

Also, I'm thinking
maybe you could paint murals of,

I don't know, things.

Oh! It's gonna be so amazing.

Uh, Lord Kogane, you're just talking
about changing what the Ninja Crew do.

We need to change how they think.

Ha! Don't be ridiculous.

People can't see your thinks.
They can only see your do's.

Now, let's talk hat colors.

Plum, peach, or hot pink?

Kids, we're going somewhere
where running around and yelling is okay!

We're going to the arcade!

Woo-hoo!

- What is this?
- Wait, you don't know what an arcade is?

Um, you didn't know
what an arcade was until recently.

Well, come on. You're gonna love it.

This is it!

Enjoy!

I think you should've
given them some guidelines.

Why?

Oh, yeah.
Definitely some guidelines. Hey, kids?

Hey, ninja kids! Ninja children!

- How do you get them to...
- Circle!

Look, kids, we're trying to get you
to stop doing all this ninja stuff.

But we're ninja.

We gotta do ninja stuff.

No, you don't.

Remember about Lady Chizu?

She was supposed to hurt her friends,
but she told Lady Fuwa no.

Yeah, I guess.

Uh, that's just a story.

Nobody ever said no to Lady Fuwa.

Chizu did. Gen and I were there.

Lady Fuwa told her to attack us
and she wouldn't do it.

- I don't believe it.
- You wanna see where it happened?

Why can't you do balloon origami?

It's so simple!

Why are you so bad at this?

These ninja must be
a bunch of numskull butterfingers.

Oh.

Bark, bark, bark.

Hey,

were you trying to do me in?

You little scamps.

You can stop this now, okay?

I believe that you're
open to new ideas, all right?

But if we keep this up,
they're gonna mash him!

Which actually sounds pretty good.

You know what? I talked myself into it.
Let's help them do it.

We can't.

Wait, can we?

No, we can't.

Lord Kogane, tiny ninja
are causing mayhem all around the city.

They're throwing people across the street,
and terrifying pets,

and stealing groceries!

People are more afraid of ninja than ever!

Really?

This is perfect.
I've been going about this all wrong.

I don't need to make you less scary.

I need to make you more scary!

You'll be my goon squad.

What?

Yes, I can use you
to eliminate my enemies.

And by enemies,

I mean that old guy at the market
who sold me that bad cantaloupe.

No!

You can't say no to me!

I mean, "No!" I will not allow you
to make the ninja your personal soldiers.

I... How dare... Of all the... But you... Well...

Huh?

You can't say no to me!

Quiet! Listen to me!

I am trying to turn the ninja
away from violence,

but if you get in my way,
I will make an exception.

Keisatsukan, protect...

Oh, you're no help.

You realize that I can make things
very difficult for you?

Ahh!

Ugh, fine.

I have better things to do anyway.

Nobody likes you
and you're smelly!

Well, you really told him.

Look, I'm sorry
I said you don't listen to new ideas.

No, you were right.

I need to be more open.

So...

- What was that idea you had?
- Um...

Dancing? For the ninja.

Ninja dancing.

Yeah, we're not doing that.
But I'll be more open starting now.

I know! Let's have a bake sale! We could...

You know what? I'm not open-minded.
Learn to live with it.

This is a sacred place, so I need
you all to be on your best behavior.

No stabbing.

Awesome!

- What is this?
- This is where it happened.

Where Chizu stood up to Lady Fuwa.

I am very worried about the Ki-Stone.

She still won't talk to me,
and there have been power fluctuations.

I think she's sick.

Why did you bring tiny ninja?

We're trying to teach these ninja kids
to be good citizens.

So far, I think all we've done
is instigate a crime spree.

But a cute, tiny crime spree, right?

No, the crimes were full-sized.

Seriously. I think Usagi and I
might be accomplices.

Let me talk to them. I'm old.

Sometimes that fools kids
into thinking you're smart.

- He did the loud whistle thing.
- Yeah, and he's old.

He must be smart!

Hey, kids. I know you've spent
your whole lives learning to fight,

but it is no longer a time for fighting.

It is a time for peace.

Ha! We have come to destroy the Ki-Stone.

- You'll have to get through us first.
- Okay.

Get 'em!

I know we're fighting,
but you still owe us money!

Yeah, I know.

Let me help.

Hey, kids,
forget that time for peace thing.

Kick some butt!

What are a bunch of kids gonna do?

Are they demons?

What exactly is your plan here?

We will disengage the Ki-Stone
and power down all the lights in the city.

In the dark,
we bats will have the advantage.

Now, bats, attack the Ki-Stone!

End the reign of light!

That was so epic!

But, um, I mean...

You kids shouldn't be fighting.

Is it a spider? Get it off!

It's never a spider. It's always Spot.

- All right? Spiders are tiny. Get a grip.
- Sorry.

Come, bats! Let us fly!

We'll be back!

No need to rush.

We're not giving up.
But next time, we'll have a plan.

You guys were great!

We never get to destroy anyone.

Wow, this is literally
the quietest this place has ever been.

Hey, you wouldn't believe it.

I thought I was gonna teach these kids,
but instead, Hana taught me.

She showed me how to meditate.
I can do three seconds now.

Ugh! Okay, I did three seconds earlier.
I'm probably just tired.

For some reason, they have security guards
at the vegetable market now.

Thank you. That's very helpful.

It's nice to see things so peaceful
around this place.

Ahh!

Oh! Hey, Spot.

I understand
you stole some vegetables today.

Usagi told us to.

Nuh-uh!

This is going to keep happening
as long as they're in the city.

I may be able to help with that.

Really? Uh, do you think...

Yes, they can come live on my farm.

I need to get back
and Hana really needs friends her own age.

Ooh!

Optimal.

Goodbye, Hana. I'll visit you soon.

Goodbye, Lady Chizu.
Thank you for everything.

I'm so proud of you, Usagi.

Goodbye, Kiyoko.

Bye-bye!

Keep an eye on him for me.

We will.

Me and Ashi will be back by tonight.

A spider! It's...

Wait.

It's Spot again, isn't it?

Yes!

Yes, yes, of course. It's Spot.
It sure is Spot.

It's so Spot.

Your tone is not reassuring.

Aw.

She misses them already.
Kiyoko loves to have friends around her.