Riverdale (2016–…): Season 7, Episode 2 - Chapter One Hundred Nineteen: Skip, Hop and Thump! - full transcript

Riverdale High's sock hop is around the corner and Archie has his sights set on taking Veronica to the dance. Betty is confused when Kevin appears uninterested in taking things to the next level with her.

The popularity and
cultural impact

of comic books in our
time cannot be overstated.

Superheroes were out, horror
and crime comics were in,

and me and my friends
were obsessed.

What the hell?

You've got to be kidding me.

Guys, you're not
gonna believe this.

Do you remember when I
submitted my story to Pep Comics

and I received that asinine
form rejection letter?

Well, they stole my
story, and published it.

Stole it? You mean
word for word?



Well, not word for word, but
it's definitely my story.

Well, I should sue 'em, right?

Can you prove it was your story?

Maybe start by
giving them a call.

Oh, shucks to that.

Pep Comics is right here in town.
I'm gonna go pay 'em a visit.

Who's with me?

Good morning, Riverdalians.

Let's begin with the
most exciting news ever,

which is that the
entertainment committee,

chaired by yours truly, is hosting
its first dance of the year.

Our annual sock hop taking
place this Friday night.

As is customary, no shoes will
be allowed on the gym floor.

So, boys, before you
ask your best girls out,



make sure that your socks match
and that they don't have any holes.

In short, the whole event is sure to be
the bee's knees and the cat's pajamas.

Tickets will be
on sale all week,

and you'll want to snap them
up early as I can now confirm

that Kevin and the Crooners
will be headlining.

See you all there.

Hey, Veronica?

I was wondering if you wanted
to go to the sock hop with me.

That depends.

Can you cut a rug?

Are you a good dancer?

Oh, yeah, of course I am.

Well, I'm sure I believe you,

but I'm still going to need
a demonstration, daddy-o.

Toni Topaz. Here to buy your
ticket to the sock hop, I hope.

That depends.

Are you asking me out?

What? Why, of course not.

No, I'm... I am
hosting the dance.

I couldn't possibly be
saddled with a date.

Not to mention that
you're... And I'm also...

- Um, and girls don't...
- Don't what?

Dance with other girls?

Calm down, Peggy Sue.

No, I'm not buying a ticket.

My pal Fangs here is a
singer, and we were hoping

that you could give him a shot
at playing at the sock hop.

You should add
him to the lineup.

And the Serpents will
be there in full force.

Hmm, and start a rumble as
greasers are wont to do?

No, thank you.

Kevin and the Crooners will be
performing, as previously announced.

Well, we offered.

Good luck selling tickets with
that B-grade barbershop quartet.

Later, Midge.

Okay, Bernie, who's the kid?

He's a writer, Al. Says we
stole one of his stories.

All right, come on in.

Tell me your tale of woe.

So you're accusing
me of what, exactly?

Well, I submitted a story,
then you rejected it.

And then, surprise, surprise,

you ran a story that
was exactly like it.

Now, you might call that
a coincidence, but I...

call it theft.

Well, I hate to burst
your bubble, kid,

but, uh, I got news for you.

There are no original ideas.

I mean, I get hundreds of
submissions every week.

It's all the same slop.

But the timing, the details.

Oh, you want proof?

These filing cabinets here, they're filled
with every single story germ I ever had.

I got a backlog just
waiting to be farmed out

to any hack who can string
together a semi-coherent sentence.

Waiting?

Like you're looking for writers?

- Always.
- Well, I'm a writer.

If I wanted to be considered,
what would I have to do?

Well, first off, drop
the persecution complex.

Listen, take this log line.

Turn it into a seven-page
story by tomorrow morning.

And if it doesn't make me
want to puke, we'll talk.

Thanks for helping me
out of this jam, Betty.

I panicked, told
Veronica that I can dance

when the truth is,
I got two left feet.

You remember when I broke Midge's
big toe doing the bunny hop.

I do. But don't worry.

We will start with something
simple and classic.

The twist.

Okay, so start just by

moving your hips from
side to side like this.

Try it.

- Like this?
- No, less of shoulders, more hips.

Okay.

Like this? I can't...

No. Maybe you just need
to focus on slow dancing.

Everyone knows
how to slow dance.

Okay.

One hand goes like this.

The other hand, here.

And then you just sway.

That's it?

Yeah, it's pretty simple, right?

And what exactly
is going on here?

Betty was just showing me
some moves, Mrs. Cooper.

I'm giving Archie
a dance lesson.

He's asking out the new girl.

She's a celebrity
from Hollywood.

Goodbye, Archie.

Bye, Betty.

Goodbye, Mrs. Cooper.

Oh, thank your sweet mother for
agreeing to chaperone with me.

Give me your expert opinion,
Ethel. I can take it.

I'm so jealous of you, Jughead.

It's my life's goal to draw
a story for Pep Comics.

They... They work with some of
the best artists in the biz.

Oh, come on. You're as good
as any of those clowns, Ethel.

I'll tell you what. If I can finish
these pages and really make them sing,

then I'll put your name forward
to Mr. Fieldstone tomorrow.

He's our editor-in-chief.

Really?

Jughead, that would...
That would be a dream.

- Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.
- Well...

Let's see what he says first.

Yoo-hoo! Sorry to interrupt.

Just wanted to make sure that everyone
had their tickets to the sock hop.

Midge Klump? One of
my precious Vixens

with a common
greaser? Sacrilege!

You get out of that
car right this minute!

Calm down! I'm coming.

Go!

Is everything okay, Kev?

Yeah, sure.

Just a little...

preoccupied, I guess.

Thinking about what songs you're
gonna sing at the sock hop?

Yeah. Yeah, and other things.

You know, you haven't officially
asked me to the sock hop yet.

Oh, uh, well, I'm performing.

So I just kind of assumed
you'd come to, you know,

cheer me on.

Right, yeah, of course.
That makes sense.

Um...

What is it? Don't
you like kissing me?

Of course. It's like I
said, I'm... I'm performing

and I don't want to
risk catching a cold.

It's always something with you.

What is that supposed to mean?

It means we've been
dating for months

and we're still
not going steady.

You haven't even pinned me yet.

How am I supposed to pin you?

I don't even play
a varsity sport...

Doesn't need to be
a varsity pin, Kev.

It can be any old pin.

Can be a ring, even.

Gosh, when did you
become such a sex maniac?

For your information,

the fact that I want
my supposed boyfriend

to kiss me once every blue moon
does not make me a sex maniac,

and I do not have
cold germs or cooties,

and I will definitely not be
cheering you on at the sock hop.

Betty... Betty.

Well, it's pretentious,
clunky, too much dialogue.

But it'll do.

Bernie, get in here.

Wha...

- Yes, Mr. Fieldstone.
- We got a live one here.

Now, see who's available to
draw a seven-page zombie story

for immediate publication.

So, I'm hired?

A dollar a page.
Take it or leave it.

Yeah, I'll take it. And, um, I know
an artist, an incredible artist.

Young, hungry, cheap,
loves monster movies.

A real fiend for gore.

Okay.

But I want those pages tomorrow.

Yeah, you'll have 'em.

And, um...

Thank you for everything,
Mr. Fieldstone.

Sorry, um...

I... I didn't know the
music room was reserved.

It's not. I was
just horsing around,

but you probably need it
to rehearse, I'm guessing.

Uh, my set for the
sock hop, yeah.

You're Clay Walker, right?

I am. Just
transferred this year.

And you're Kevin Keller.
Son of the sheriff,

dating the prettiest
girl at Riverdale High.

I've done my research.

Uh, where did you transfer from?

All over. My dad's in
the... Was in the military.

Cool. Cool.

Are you going to the sock hop?

I wouldn't have a date.
I don't know many people.

Unless, uh, you could think
of someone I should ask.

A lot of people go stag here.

It's nice to meet you.

Hey. Uh, so I did a
little brushing up

and I'm ready for
that demonstration.

How do you feel
about slow dancing?

Nothing better.

But upon further reflection,

I have no doubt a Troy
Donahue type like you

can trip the light
fantastic, Archie.

So does that mean...

But, quite candidly,

I'm also entertaining
other offers.

What? Oh...

Wow, okay.

However, being my escort
demands more than mere dancing.

It also requires
scintillating conversation.

I need to know that you won't
be a bore at the sock hop.

So, why don't you
clean yourself up

and come by the Pembrooke
at 6:00-ish tonight?

I'll be wanting to discuss
politics, art, current events.

Dazzle me with your wit.

Okay?

Dazzle you. Okay.

Well, I should motor.

See you tonight.

Archiekins?

I'm rooting for you, stud.

So they just do whatever
you say, is that it?

Hmm?

Oh, you mean boys?

Boys aren't too,
too complicated.

I wish I had your confidence.

Why don't you?

What do you mean?

I mean, I'm only just getting
my sea legs here in Riverdale,

but I can already tell
you're a catch, Betty.

A total Marilyn.

You and Kevin the Crooner
are going steady, aren't you?

Um, not officially.

We may even be on the rocks.

That's a shame...

for him.

Why don't you invite some
other boy to the sock hop?

Get Kevin all hot and bothered.

That's always fun, keeping
our beaus on their toes.

Surely there's some
He-Man at Riverdale High

you'd like to make time with.

Tickets. Get your
tickets to the sock hop.

Buy one, get one free.

You... Dilton Doiley.

- Why haven't you bought a ticket to my sock hop yet?
- Uh...

For that matter, why are some people
trying to return their tickets?

Um... It might be
because of the Serpents.

What about the Serpents?

What are they planning?

They said they were going to
be waiting in the parking lot,

and they're gonna throw
rotten eggs at anyone

who tries going to the dance.

Barbarians.

And who, pray tell, is the
one making these threats.

Mostly that scary Toni girl.

Of course. It would be her.

Well, this means war.

Dismissed.

Mom?

Can you help?

Hang on.

I might have something
that'll do the trick.

Oh, that's more like it.

I think I'll have to
let it out a little bit,

but other than that,
it fits perfectly.

It's a little
old-fashioned, isn't it?

Well, it was your dad's,

but he'd want you to wear it,
especially to your first dance.

Well, actually, I
need it tonight, Mom.

Yeah. Veronica asked me over.

You're taking her to the dance?

If I'm lucky.

She wants to give me a
test run, you could say?

I don't like the sound of that.

A bit haughty, isn't it?

It's not like that.

Veronica is from Los Angeles

and she's practically
a movie star.

Standards are
different out there.

- Aw, geez, Mom.
- I'm fine.

It's just, seeing
you here in his suit,

it just brings back
so many memories.

You know, your father and I
went to the sock hop together.

He was such a romantic

and he wrote me
the sweetest poems.

I still have them somewhere.

Poems?

He knew how to
make a girl swoon.

This one, I think.

- Yeah?
- Mm-hmm.

So, Veronica invited me over
to her place tonight, and...

I need to impress her.

So don't laugh...

but I wrote her a poem.

I just need someone
to read it and just

tell me if it's
crazy to give to her.

Okay. Hand it
over, Walt Whitman.

Well, is it terrible?

No.

It's actually really sweet.

You have a poet's soul, Arch.

Who knew?

So this is where
the Serpents dwell.

I always imagined
it'd be something

more like a biker
bar, but this...

- This is...
- The Dark Room is

a coffeehouse for bikers,
beatniks and badasses.

Which begs the question, what
are you doing here, preppy?

Better question.

Why are you so hell-bent
on ruining my sock hop

the same way your
slimy Serpent pal

tried to ruin my virtuous Vixen?

Okay, Cheryl. You want people
at your dance, I dig it.

So I'll pitch it again.

Let my boy Fangs blow
the roof off the gym

and we'll pack the place.

For the bazillionth time, I have
already booked Kevin and the Crooners.

Yeah, the Crooners are doneskis.

Look, Fangs is about to play.

So why don't you order
yourself a cappuccino,

take a load off
and hear him play?

Maybe you'll change your mind

and you and I can get
better acquainted.

- Archie, you made it.
- Am I late?

Oh, not at all, lover boy.

We were just discussing
President Eisenhower's decision

to run for a second term.

And let me warn you, the
others are very divided.

- I'm sorry. Others?
- Come. Come on in.

We're having aperitifs
in the parlor.

Mom, can I ask your
advice about something?

Well, of course,
honey. What is it?

I think I'm having weird
feelings about Archie.

Oh. What sort of feelings?

Like, stirrings?

When we were dancing, I felt
a flutter in my stomach.

Is it possible that
this fluttering is

a reaction to feeling
underappreciated by Kevin?

I hadn't thought of it that way.

Which is why it's a good
thing that you came to me.

Holy hell, Ethel.

There is no way
that Mr. Fieldstone

doesn't hire you
after he sees these.

- You really think so?
- Yeah.

Even though I'm a girl?

If he doesn't, I'll
eat my own crown.

So, uh, Jughead, the sock
hop's tomorrow night.

It is?

What if we went together?

Like, for kicks?

Yeah, yeah, just for kicks.

Might be fun.

Could have a decent spread,
cookies and whatnot.

Since when are boys
allowed in your room?

We're just studying, Mom.

Well, whatever you were doing,
you're lucky your father's

working nights at the
factory this week.

I was actually just leaving.

I'll see you at school tomorrow.

Excuse me. Sorry.

So then I said,
"Sorry, Mr. Sinatra,

- but I think Elvis
sang it better."

Oh, no.

Archie, are you all right?

You've been quiet all night.

Yeah, I'm good.

I was just... I was
just taking it all in.

- Soaking it up.
- Like the sponge that you are.

I see you're admiring
the painting.

- It's a...
- It's a Monet. Am I right?

Indeed. You have a
connoisseur's eyes, Julian.

I appreciate beautiful things.

Every summer, my family goes on
an art-buying tour in Europe.

Archie, what do you
think of the painting?

Um...

It's beautiful and all, uh...

I guess I just prefer an
artist like Norman Rockwell.

Then again, I'm not really an art
tour through Europe kind of guy.

- So...
- That's obvious from what you're wearing, chump.

Where'd you get that suit?

Some thrift store?

It's my father's suit.

And you better shut
your trap, Blossom.

Wasn't he buried in his suit?

Or did he have more than one?

He was buried in his uniform.

Well, I, for one, think you
look very striking, Archie.

And I like a bit of variety in my
men's attire, as well as in my men.

So, who's up for charades?

You know, Veronica, it has
been a real swell night,

but, uh... I think I'm just
gonna blow out of here.

If I stay any longer, I might be
liable to spill someone's blue blood

all over your nice,
expensive things.

Good morning, Mrs. Andrews.

As you may know,
I'm Veronica Lodge.

Is Archie home, by any chance?

He's at the grocery store.

Shopping? This early?

Archie told me everything
that happened last night.

Well, that's actually
why I'm here.

I feel terrible about it.

I didn't mean for things
to happen the way they did.

My Archie is not some
Hollywood playboy.

He's a simple boy. So simple
that he's mad at Julian Blossom

and himself for what happened
at your little soiree,

when you and I both know
who the real villainess was.

I mean, what kind of person

auditions boys to
go to a sock hop?

Well, when your
parents are actors...

Sorry. That's not an excuse.

Listen, if you hurt my boy,

you and I are going to
have some serious trouble,

Little Miss Femme Fatale.

- Thanks for stopping by, Kevin.

- High Point?
- Okay.

So, Betty tells me
that the two of you

have had some
troubles as of late.

Would you agree?

I feel awful, Mrs. Cooper.

It's like... Betty wants
these things from me,

but I'm not sure if I
can give them to her.

It's perfectly normal
for girls Betty's age

to have certain...

expectations of what their
boyfriends are willing to do.

May I make a suggestion?

I'm going to give you this.

You see, Betty just
wants to be pinned.

She wants to feel appreciated.

And then all of those...
feelings will settle.

But won't a pin mean
she'll expect more from me?

Oh, no. A pin takes
off the pressure.

You see, it's a symbol for
what every girl craves.

They just... They
just want a fella

that's going to carry their
books home from school

or take them to the
movies Saturday night

or call them on the
telephone before supper.

Is that all?

A pin is a promise, Kevin.

Don't tell anyone, but
this is the actual pin

that Mr. Cooper gave
me back in high school.

See, this pin

somehow answered a desire
that we both were feeling,

and then things were fine and
pure from that point forward.

You're a good boy, Kevin.

And Betty is a good girl.

And I believe that this pin
will take care of everything.

Tickets. Get your tickets
for tonight's sock hop.

- Hurry up!
- You, four eyes.

Get your tickets to
the sock hop yet?

Uh... no.

Well, pony up, poindexter,

because my pal Fangs
Fogarty is performing.

And trust me, you'll be kicking
yourself if you miss it.

I'll take one.

Five. I'll take five.

By the way, did you, uh, break
the bad news to Kevin yet?

No. But I will.

Can you dig it?

Putting aside the fact
that you were drawing

while Dr. Doiley
was lecturing,

in and of itself a
flagrant violation

of school etiquette.

Dr. Werthers and I are also

deeply concerned about
what you were drawing.

Where did the vision for
this come from, Ethel?

Your subconscious? A
nightmare? The movies?

They're for a story.

What kind of story?

A comic book.

That I'm on deadline to finish.

That's why I was drawing
in Dr. Doiley's class.

I'm... I'm trying to
get a job at Pep Comics.

They're based here in town.

I'm sorry, Ethel, but
your budding career

as an illustrator
of lurid comic books

doesn't remotely
justify this behavior.

You have a week's
detention, starting today.

Veronica.

Archie. Hi.

Look, about last night...

I'm sorry I rushed out
of there like that.

I, uh...

I sincerely was going to rip
Julian Blossom's head off.

Well, he would have deserved it.

And I'm mortified about
what he said to you.

I truly had a good time
getting to know you better.

Well, um, in that case,

if you haven't made
your decision yet,

I'm still keen on taking
you to the sock hop tonight.

I would love that, Archie,

but I've already
made my selection.

And... I'm not
going with anyone.

What? Why?

With so many excellent options, it's
simply impossible for an it girl to choose.

Options like Julian Blossom?

You know, I don't
get you, Veronica.

I mean, what was last night's
dog-and-pony show all about then?

I mean, forget last
night. This entire week.

Making us... Making me jump
through hoops like that?

It was a game, Archie.

The queen of the hive gets
all her worker bees abuzz

and then flies away before...
Before anyone's stung too badly.

So, have you made your pick yet?

Here's a late-breaking
scoop for Hedda Hopper.

Socialite Veronica Lodge has
decided to go stag to the sock hop.

Well, what happened?
What about Archie?

I'm in the midst of a
rude awakening, Betty.

Turns out I've been
careless and thoughtless

with a lot of the boys
at Riverdale High.

Archie most especially,
and most undeservingly.

Did you not like his poem?

What poem?

Archie wrote you a poem.
Did he not give it to you?

Not that I know of.

Not that I deserve, in any case.

Wait a minute. So who's Archie
going to the sock hop with?

No one, as far as I know.

I'll tell you one thing, though.

Whoever does end up
going with Archie,

she is one lucky girl.

Hey, Betty, can I talk
to you for a second?

It's important.

Sure, let's talk.

Cheryl bumped me
and the Crooners.

Fangs Fogarty's performing.

Apparently, he's God's
gift or something.

I heard. Kev, I'm sorry.

No, uh... I'm sorry.

Betty, I'm really...
I'm really sorry.

I was a dope.

And you are the most wonderful,

most ginchiest girl in the world,
and I took that for granted.

That won't happen again. Um...

Betty Cooper, will
you go steady with me?

- Kevin...
- Things will be different this time.

I promise. I...

I love you, Betty. I do.

And you make my heart feel full.

So will you be my girl?

Will you go to the
sock hop with me?

Yeah, of course.

- Yeah?
- Yeah.

All right.

Um...

Uh...

How do I...
- I'll... I'll do it.

Okay.

All right.

Guess who didn't show up
for her assigned detention?

The Muggs girl.

I'm concerned, Felix. I... I think
we should speak to Ethel's parents.

God knows what's
troubling that girl.

Now, you want me to believe
that a girl, this girl,

generated these pages?

Yes, and she's currently
skipping detention

because of how badly she wants
to draw comic books for you,

Mr. Fieldstone.

Well, young lady, let
me congratulate you.

These are the most putrid
pages I've seen in a long time.

And that's the highest
compliment I can give any artist.

Freckles, you have
some real talent.

What's your name?

Ethel.

Thank you, Mr. Fieldstone.

Well, freckles, you and boy
wonder here make a terrific team.

So, what are you,
boyfriend-girlfriend?

Uh, no.

We are just creative partners.

- But we are going to the sock hop together.
- Ah.

Smithers. I'm about
to put my face on.

My apologies, Miss Veronica.

But I was emptying the bins
and came across something

that I believe belongs to you.

What's this?

It seems to be a poem, miss.

Mom, Dad, is
everything all right?

We got called down
to your school.

They said you're acting
like some delinquent.

Drawing dirty pictures.

On top of staying
up at all hours,

inviting boys into your bedroom

and now missing detention?

We did not raise
you this way, Ethel.

Maybe if you didn't
drink so much, Mom.

And maybe if you weren't so
miserable all of the time, Dad.

The hell did you just say to me?

Never mind.

Where do you think you're going?

I'm going to the sock
hop with Jughead.

Over my dead body, you are.

If it isn't Kevin of Kevin
and the Crooners fame.

Yeah, hardly.

Just plain old Kevin
Keller tonight.

I was sorry to hear that
tonight's lineup had been changed.

Oh, easy come, easy go.

Supposedly, Fangs is an
out-of-this-world singer.

Yeah, and he sure
is easy on the eyes.

But I can say the
same about you.

Anyway, I was...

I was really looking forward
to seeing you perform tonight.

Maybe you can give me a private
concert one of these days?

Yeah.

Um, look, Clay, uh, Betty's
waiting for her punch,

- so if you'll excuse me?
- Of course. Have fun tonight.

Good evening, Riverdale High.

Who's ready to rock 'n' roll?

Well, in that case,

find somebody to hold on to...

because we're about
to shake things up.

Told you Fangs was
the next Chuck Berry.

I wouldn't go that far.

Come on, let's see your moves.

I'm fine supervising
from right here.

- Thank you very much.
- One boogie woogie

and I'll stop hassling you if
that's what you really want.

Fine. But just one dance.

I got the poem you wrote for me.

Or at least I think you did.

"A stolen look across the hall.

I hope she hears my silent call.

Dreams of walks
through moonlit nights

with the girl more beautiful
than all the cosmic sights."

It's beautiful, Archie.

Um... It barely rhymes.

How do you feel about a do-over?

Or, to put it in other words,

Archie Andrews, may
I have this dance?

I'm sorry, Veronica.

Maybe next time.

Will you excuse me?

Of course.

Veronica Lodge.

Julian Blossom.

Where have you been
keeping yourself?

Oh, I've been around.
Waiting for my moment.

You could do a lot
worse, you know.

Why not?

Boys and girls dancing
in chaste harmony.

Just as God intended.

Wouldn't you
agree, Ms. Blossom?

Yes, everything is
as it's meant to be.

Ethel?

Ethel! Ethel.

Ethel.

Is this blood?

Jughead...

Something terrible has happened.