Regular Show (2009–2017): Season 6, Episode 7 - Eileen Flat Screen - full transcript
After Eileen winning a flat-screen tv, Rigby decides to install her new tv to surprise her. The only problem lies within Eileen's roommate who wouldn't let anything new come around her house.
[♪♪♪]
[MID-TEMPO MUSIC PLAYS]
[EXPLOSION]
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
Ha ha ha, okay!
Let me get a honk-honk in here
'cause you goosed it!
[HORN HONKS]
[GOOSE HONKS]
It's time
to announce the winner
of the City College
Modern Dance Competition!
Now, I don't want
to pigeonhole anyone
but first prize today
goes to...
Eileen Roberts,
with the dance "Chewed Gum"!
Aah!
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
To say you blew away
the competition
wouldn't be os-trich!
[a stretch]
Aah!
Let's see how well you dance
after a year of
sitting in front
of your very own
flat-screen TV!
Aaaah! This is the best thing
that's ever happened to me!
TOGETHER:
Eileen flat screen!
Eileen flat screen!
Thanks for coming, everyone!
And to all you losers today,
don't rooster on your laurels
'cause there's
always next year!
[ROOSTER CROWS]
Eileen,
that was awesome!
Yeah, I knew
you were gonna win
as soon as you came out
of that giant gum wrapper.
Nice work,
I-loin!
[CHUCKLES]
Thanks, guys!
Wa-aah! I was never
into TV before
but that was 'cause I didn't
have the right equipment.
I wish I could go
watch it right now but
I've got to get to work!
Don't worry about it, Eileen.
I'll drop it off at your place.
Really?
Yeah, of course.
Wow, thanks, Rigby.
I've got to run.
See you guys later!
Later.
Bye!
Give me a hand
with this, Mordecai.
That was really nice of you
to offer to help Eileen.
Well, I'm not actually
gonna drop it off.
What?
Rigby!
Eileen worked hard.
You can't just --
No, I'm not just
gonna drop it off.
I'm gonna install it
for her!
Surprise her when
she gets home from work.
You are?
We can watch it,
maybe get some pizza.
It'll be awesome!
That will be awesome.
That might be the nicest thing
you've ever done.
Like you said,
she worked hard for this.
There's a step behind you.
That's enough.
You're freaking me out.
Hang on.
Let me get the key.
You know where Eileen
keeps her house key?
Yeah, I water her plants
when she goes out of town
for a dance invitational
or whatever.
Wait, I thought Eileen
didn't have a TV?
Oh. Yeah.
That's Joanne's.
Who's Joanne?
Eileen's new roommate.
She's this beast who leaves
all her junk everywhere
and uses Eileen's hand towels
to dry her butt.
Is this her?
Ugh, yeah!
That's her all right.
What a donkey.
She ate an entire thing of
Eileen's peanut butter
but she won't even
let her near the TV.
One time we were
just hangin' out...
[WATCH BEEPS]
[GASPS]
It's starting!
The Carter and Briggs
Reunion Special!
Wait, Rigby,
don't!
Not here.
There's a TV
in front of us
and a Carter and Briggs
Special going on inside it!
Uh...Ohh!
Eileen, come on!
Throw a rig a bone!
[SIGHS]
Okay.
I guess since Joanne's out
of town it'll be all right.
JOANNE:
I knew it!
Joanne! I thought
you were at the beach!
I was at the beach,
until I realized something
like this might happen!
How could I enjoy the surf and
sun knowing you could be here,
messing with my TV!
I'm sorry!
I didn't think it-- [GASPS]
Next time, that remote
will be your face.
To clarify, next time
I'll slap your face.
I didn't even make that up.
That's exactly what happened.
Okay, so, I guess
we shouldn't touch
any of Joanne's
stuff.
Yeah, I think if we just
put the flat screen
on the wall over here
it'll be cool.
I can't believe
she still has
one of these junky
old Hanatronics.
This must be first
generation it's so old.
I told you,
she's a beast.
Her TV's probably
too scared to die on her.
Let me just grab my tools
so we can get mounting.
[♪♪♪]
Wow, Rigby,
those almost look real.
Pffft!
And what's up
with the whip?
It's my utility whip!
It has a thousand uses!
Eileen and I got it
at a Renaissance Faire.
When did you go
to a Ren Faire?
And why are you two always
hanging out without me?
You and C.J. are always
together, doin' your thing.
What am I supposed to do,
hang out by myself?
Hey, hey, cool it.
Rigby, show us
your whippin' skills.
"Whip" pleasure.
Wha-cha!
Uhh...let's focus on
putting up that flat screen.
[♪♪♪]
[MUSIC MONTAGE CONTINUES]
ALL:
Eileen flat screen!
Now to plug it in
and try it out.
Ugh! Joanne's giant plug
is plugging up the whole plug!
Just move it down to the bottom.
They'll both fit.
[JOANNE'S VOICE ECHOING]:
I'll slap your face!
Isn't there another
outlet in here?
MORDECAI:
This one looks
kind of full.
All right, whatever!
I'm not gonna be threatened
by some socket hog!
And that's that.
What are you doing?
Aah! Joanne!
Did you touch my TV?
No.
You better not, because
the hand that touches my TV
is a hand you'll
never get back.
And by that I mean
I'm ripping it off your body
and keeping it.
Look, Joanne, I--
What's that?
What's what?
Move it, shrimp.
No! Wait!
I knew it!
You mess with my TV,
I mess with yours!
[GRUNTS]
[♪♪♪]
No, not the flat screen!
Joanne, stop!
We can talk this out!
She's already halfway
up the street!
[♪♪♪]
[BREATHING HEAVILY]
Get out.
Is everything all right?
I said get out!
Aah!
Don't hurt me!
Come on, Rigby,
let's go!
Dude, why're you bringin'
that thing?
If she's gonna mess
with Eileen's flat screen,
we're gonna mess
with her Hanatronic.
Oh, Joanne's gonna slap
a face today!
[BREATHING HEAVILY]
Where's she
even going?
No way to know.
She doesn't think like us.
Just follow her!
[TIRES SQUEAL]
[GROWLS]
[GRUNTS]
Look out!
ALL: Aaah!
Nice try.
Teeth! Teeth!
[SCREAMING]
[BOTH GROAN]
What happened?
Where'd she go?
There she is,
on the bridge!
RIGBY:
Joanne! Stop!
I'll teach you to mess
with other people's stuff!
Come on, Joanne.
Let's take it easy
with the flat screen.
[GROWLS]
We were wrong
to touch your TV.
Haven't you ever
made a mistake?
The only mistake I made
was leaving my TV alone
with that no-respect
mooch-wad Eileen!
[GROWLS]
[SIGHS]
Hey, look.
I know you wouldn't want
anything to happen to your TV,
just like we wouldn't want
anything to happen to Eileen's.
I get it, Joanne.
This thing has been
your best friend
since you were
a baby.
It entertained you
when you were bored,
It made you laugh
when you were sad,
and maybe,
just maybe,
it helps you forget
for a minute
that you are
a hideous monster.
[GROWLS]
What do you say, Joanne?
Let's just swap TVs
and move on, okay?
No one needs
to get hurt here.
[GROWLS]
[SIGHS]
Okay.
Okay.
Not!
BOTH:
No!
Eileen's TV
that she won
in a dance competition!
[SIGHS]
That was close.
Whoa, Rigby!
Nice whip action!
Ugh, whatever.
Just give my TV back.
[WIND WHISTLES]
[THUD]
[SCREAMS]
[CONTINUES SCREAMING]
She really liked
that old TV, huh?
Oh, no!
The ghost of my family's
inheritance lawyer!
Nooo!
[DIALING]
She failed, sir.
[CRYING]
Joanne! What have you done?
Grandpa Hanatronic,
I can explain!
Wait. Is your last name
"Hanatronic?"
Uh, yeah, hello?
Joanne Hanatronic?
Heir to the Hanatronic
television dynasty?
Did you know
that was her name?
I just thought
it was a weird coincidence!
Enough! Why is our priceless
family television
sitting at the bottom
of this river?
It's still...good?
[SQUAWKS]
You have disgraced
the family name.
Now you must give up
your modern lifestyle.
And by that, I mean
the shared rental unit
you inhabit with
that commoner.
No!
Get in the limo.
Ugh!
Are all my horses
still there?
They are.
[GROWLS]
[TIRES SQUEAL]
Wait. What just
happened here?
[GHOSTLY MOAN]
I'm glad you asked!
When Joanne asked to live
on her own amongst the,
shall we say,
"lower classes,"
we allowed it, as long
as she continued to protect
the family's
most prized heirloom:
The original television her
family's company produced.
In retrospect, we probably
should have kept it in a safe.
As a result, she will no longer
inherit the company.
What's gonna
happen to her?
She will be punished
with a life of
opulence and leisure
at the Hanatronic
family manor.
[GHOSTLY MOAN]
She'll be fine.
[WIND WHISTLES]
Now I get why she didn't
want you touchin' her stuff.
[DOOR OPENS]
What's going on?
TOGETHER:
Surprise!
Check it out, Eileen!
Your TV's all set up!
Don't worry 'bout
the installs,
it's ready for
your eyeballs!
Nuh-uh!
You guys didn't have to
go to so much trouble!
Thank you!
It was all Rigby's idea.
Really?
And as an added bonus,
Joanne's not your
roommate anymore!
Yes!
I mean, uh, that's cool, too.
Care to do
the honors?
And now let's hear
from some holiday shoppers
down at the mall!
Lines are long.
It's too crowded
and it smells weird.
Hey, mom.
Look! I'm on TV.
Aah! The local news!
This is the best
surprise ever.
Well, we wanted
to order a pizza
and have it ready
for you when you got here,
but we didn't plan ahead.
Or did we?
[DOORBELL RINGS]
PIZZA GUY: Pizza guy!
Whoa, Rigby.
impressive!
Seriously.
This was all really cool.
I'm proud of you, man.
Thanks, Mordecai.
Can I borrow some money
for the pizza guy?
Pfff. Guess things
are back to normal.
[LAUGHTER]
If this is normal,
then I'm really
happy with normal.
PIZZA GUY:
Uh, hello?
Oh, uh, we'll get that.
Should I grab
some plates?
I've got some soda
in the fridge!
Can you tell me
how to get out of here?
[CHUCKLES]
Looks like the usual
holiday craziness, Phil.
From the Two Pines Mall,
This is Margaret Smith
reporting live.
Stay warm out there,
Margaret.
Thanks, Phil!
It's good to be back in town.
[♪♪♪]
[MID-TEMPO MUSIC PLAYS]
[EXPLOSION]
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
Ha ha ha, okay!
Let me get a honk-honk in here
'cause you goosed it!
[HORN HONKS]
[GOOSE HONKS]
It's time
to announce the winner
of the City College
Modern Dance Competition!
Now, I don't want
to pigeonhole anyone
but first prize today
goes to...
Eileen Roberts,
with the dance "Chewed Gum"!
Aah!
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
To say you blew away
the competition
wouldn't be os-trich!
[a stretch]
Aah!
Let's see how well you dance
after a year of
sitting in front
of your very own
flat-screen TV!
Aaaah! This is the best thing
that's ever happened to me!
TOGETHER:
Eileen flat screen!
Eileen flat screen!
Thanks for coming, everyone!
And to all you losers today,
don't rooster on your laurels
'cause there's
always next year!
[ROOSTER CROWS]
Eileen,
that was awesome!
Yeah, I knew
you were gonna win
as soon as you came out
of that giant gum wrapper.
Nice work,
I-loin!
[CHUCKLES]
Thanks, guys!
Wa-aah! I was never
into TV before
but that was 'cause I didn't
have the right equipment.
I wish I could go
watch it right now but
I've got to get to work!
Don't worry about it, Eileen.
I'll drop it off at your place.
Really?
Yeah, of course.
Wow, thanks, Rigby.
I've got to run.
See you guys later!
Later.
Bye!
Give me a hand
with this, Mordecai.
That was really nice of you
to offer to help Eileen.
Well, I'm not actually
gonna drop it off.
What?
Rigby!
Eileen worked hard.
You can't just --
No, I'm not just
gonna drop it off.
I'm gonna install it
for her!
Surprise her when
she gets home from work.
You are?
We can watch it,
maybe get some pizza.
It'll be awesome!
That will be awesome.
That might be the nicest thing
you've ever done.
Like you said,
she worked hard for this.
There's a step behind you.
That's enough.
You're freaking me out.
Hang on.
Let me get the key.
You know where Eileen
keeps her house key?
Yeah, I water her plants
when she goes out of town
for a dance invitational
or whatever.
Wait, I thought Eileen
didn't have a TV?
Oh. Yeah.
That's Joanne's.
Who's Joanne?
Eileen's new roommate.
She's this beast who leaves
all her junk everywhere
and uses Eileen's hand towels
to dry her butt.
Is this her?
Ugh, yeah!
That's her all right.
What a donkey.
She ate an entire thing of
Eileen's peanut butter
but she won't even
let her near the TV.
One time we were
just hangin' out...
[WATCH BEEPS]
[GASPS]
It's starting!
The Carter and Briggs
Reunion Special!
Wait, Rigby,
don't!
Not here.
There's a TV
in front of us
and a Carter and Briggs
Special going on inside it!
Uh...Ohh!
Eileen, come on!
Throw a rig a bone!
[SIGHS]
Okay.
I guess since Joanne's out
of town it'll be all right.
JOANNE:
I knew it!
Joanne! I thought
you were at the beach!
I was at the beach,
until I realized something
like this might happen!
How could I enjoy the surf and
sun knowing you could be here,
messing with my TV!
I'm sorry!
I didn't think it-- [GASPS]
Next time, that remote
will be your face.
To clarify, next time
I'll slap your face.
I didn't even make that up.
That's exactly what happened.
Okay, so, I guess
we shouldn't touch
any of Joanne's
stuff.
Yeah, I think if we just
put the flat screen
on the wall over here
it'll be cool.
I can't believe
she still has
one of these junky
old Hanatronics.
This must be first
generation it's so old.
I told you,
she's a beast.
Her TV's probably
too scared to die on her.
Let me just grab my tools
so we can get mounting.
[♪♪♪]
Wow, Rigby,
those almost look real.
Pffft!
And what's up
with the whip?
It's my utility whip!
It has a thousand uses!
Eileen and I got it
at a Renaissance Faire.
When did you go
to a Ren Faire?
And why are you two always
hanging out without me?
You and C.J. are always
together, doin' your thing.
What am I supposed to do,
hang out by myself?
Hey, hey, cool it.
Rigby, show us
your whippin' skills.
"Whip" pleasure.
Wha-cha!
Uhh...let's focus on
putting up that flat screen.
[♪♪♪]
[MUSIC MONTAGE CONTINUES]
ALL:
Eileen flat screen!
Now to plug it in
and try it out.
Ugh! Joanne's giant plug
is plugging up the whole plug!
Just move it down to the bottom.
They'll both fit.
[JOANNE'S VOICE ECHOING]:
I'll slap your face!
Isn't there another
outlet in here?
MORDECAI:
This one looks
kind of full.
All right, whatever!
I'm not gonna be threatened
by some socket hog!
And that's that.
What are you doing?
Aah! Joanne!
Did you touch my TV?
No.
You better not, because
the hand that touches my TV
is a hand you'll
never get back.
And by that I mean
I'm ripping it off your body
and keeping it.
Look, Joanne, I--
What's that?
What's what?
Move it, shrimp.
No! Wait!
I knew it!
You mess with my TV,
I mess with yours!
[GRUNTS]
[♪♪♪]
No, not the flat screen!
Joanne, stop!
We can talk this out!
She's already halfway
up the street!
[♪♪♪]
[BREATHING HEAVILY]
Get out.
Is everything all right?
I said get out!
Aah!
Don't hurt me!
Come on, Rigby,
let's go!
Dude, why're you bringin'
that thing?
If she's gonna mess
with Eileen's flat screen,
we're gonna mess
with her Hanatronic.
Oh, Joanne's gonna slap
a face today!
[BREATHING HEAVILY]
Where's she
even going?
No way to know.
She doesn't think like us.
Just follow her!
[TIRES SQUEAL]
[GROWLS]
[GRUNTS]
Look out!
ALL: Aaah!
Nice try.
Teeth! Teeth!
[SCREAMING]
[BOTH GROAN]
What happened?
Where'd she go?
There she is,
on the bridge!
RIGBY:
Joanne! Stop!
I'll teach you to mess
with other people's stuff!
Come on, Joanne.
Let's take it easy
with the flat screen.
[GROWLS]
We were wrong
to touch your TV.
Haven't you ever
made a mistake?
The only mistake I made
was leaving my TV alone
with that no-respect
mooch-wad Eileen!
[GROWLS]
[SIGHS]
Hey, look.
I know you wouldn't want
anything to happen to your TV,
just like we wouldn't want
anything to happen to Eileen's.
I get it, Joanne.
This thing has been
your best friend
since you were
a baby.
It entertained you
when you were bored,
It made you laugh
when you were sad,
and maybe,
just maybe,
it helps you forget
for a minute
that you are
a hideous monster.
[GROWLS]
What do you say, Joanne?
Let's just swap TVs
and move on, okay?
No one needs
to get hurt here.
[GROWLS]
[SIGHS]
Okay.
Okay.
Not!
BOTH:
No!
Eileen's TV
that she won
in a dance competition!
[SIGHS]
That was close.
Whoa, Rigby!
Nice whip action!
Ugh, whatever.
Just give my TV back.
[WIND WHISTLES]
[THUD]
[SCREAMS]
[CONTINUES SCREAMING]
She really liked
that old TV, huh?
Oh, no!
The ghost of my family's
inheritance lawyer!
Nooo!
[DIALING]
She failed, sir.
[CRYING]
Joanne! What have you done?
Grandpa Hanatronic,
I can explain!
Wait. Is your last name
"Hanatronic?"
Uh, yeah, hello?
Joanne Hanatronic?
Heir to the Hanatronic
television dynasty?
Did you know
that was her name?
I just thought
it was a weird coincidence!
Enough! Why is our priceless
family television
sitting at the bottom
of this river?
It's still...good?
[SQUAWKS]
You have disgraced
the family name.
Now you must give up
your modern lifestyle.
And by that, I mean
the shared rental unit
you inhabit with
that commoner.
No!
Get in the limo.
Ugh!
Are all my horses
still there?
They are.
[GROWLS]
[TIRES SQUEAL]
Wait. What just
happened here?
[GHOSTLY MOAN]
I'm glad you asked!
When Joanne asked to live
on her own amongst the,
shall we say,
"lower classes,"
we allowed it, as long
as she continued to protect
the family's
most prized heirloom:
The original television her
family's company produced.
In retrospect, we probably
should have kept it in a safe.
As a result, she will no longer
inherit the company.
What's gonna
happen to her?
She will be punished
with a life of
opulence and leisure
at the Hanatronic
family manor.
[GHOSTLY MOAN]
She'll be fine.
[WIND WHISTLES]
Now I get why she didn't
want you touchin' her stuff.
[DOOR OPENS]
What's going on?
TOGETHER:
Surprise!
Check it out, Eileen!
Your TV's all set up!
Don't worry 'bout
the installs,
it's ready for
your eyeballs!
Nuh-uh!
You guys didn't have to
go to so much trouble!
Thank you!
It was all Rigby's idea.
Really?
And as an added bonus,
Joanne's not your
roommate anymore!
Yes!
I mean, uh, that's cool, too.
Care to do
the honors?
And now let's hear
from some holiday shoppers
down at the mall!
Lines are long.
It's too crowded
and it smells weird.
Hey, mom.
Look! I'm on TV.
Aah! The local news!
This is the best
surprise ever.
Well, we wanted
to order a pizza
and have it ready
for you when you got here,
but we didn't plan ahead.
Or did we?
[DOORBELL RINGS]
PIZZA GUY: Pizza guy!
Whoa, Rigby.
impressive!
Seriously.
This was all really cool.
I'm proud of you, man.
Thanks, Mordecai.
Can I borrow some money
for the pizza guy?
Pfff. Guess things
are back to normal.
[LAUGHTER]
If this is normal,
then I'm really
happy with normal.
PIZZA GUY:
Uh, hello?
Oh, uh, we'll get that.
Should I grab
some plates?
I've got some soda
in the fridge!
Can you tell me
how to get out of here?
[CHUCKLES]
Looks like the usual
holiday craziness, Phil.
From the Two Pines Mall,
This is Margaret Smith
reporting live.
Stay warm out there,
Margaret.
Thanks, Phil!
It's good to be back in town.
[♪♪♪]