Raven's Home (2017–…): Season 3, Episode 2 - Lost at Chel-Sea - full transcript

¶¶

Previously on Raven's Home...

I'm gonna go take you
to see your mom.

Yes! Finally!

I've been acting out for weeks!

I've already got
my suitcase packed!

I want to come home.

But we're bringing
Levi to you.

No, Rae, this is over.

-Where's Levi?
-Oh, he got so excited,

he ran up the ramp.
The kids are getting him.



Why is the dock moving
away from the ship?

It's not the dock
that's moving, it's us!

The next stop is Miami!

All:
Miami?!

What are we gonna do, Rae?

I mean, how are we gonna
catch up to them?

-(Chelsea shrieks)
-Hold on tight, Chels!

Can you do this, Raven?!
(shrieks)

Of course I can!
It's for the kids!

-Now stop talking
and hold down my wig!
-(both scream)

(theme music playing)

¶ Yo!
Let me tell you somethin' ¶

¶ Had my vision
all worked out ¶

¶ But then life
had other plans ¶



¶ Tell 'em, Rae ¶

¶ It's crazy when things
turn upside down ¶

¶ But ya gotta get up
and take that chance ¶

-¶ Maybe I'm
just finding my way ¶
-¶ Learning how to fly ¶

-¶ Yeah, we're gonna be okay ¶
-¶ Ya know I got you, right? ¶

¶ It might be wild, but ya
know that we make it work ¶

¶ We're just kids
caught up in a crazy world ¶

-¶ Come on ¶
-¶ It's Raven's Home ¶

-¶ We get loud! ¶
-¶ It's Raven's Home ¶

¶ It's our crowd! ¶

¶ Might be tough,
but together
we make it look good ¶

¶ Down for each other
like family should ¶

¶ It's Raven's Home ¶

-¶ When it's tough ¶
-¶ It's Raven's Home ¶

¶ We got love ¶

¶ 'Cause no matter the weather,
ya know we gon' shine ¶

¶ There for each other,
ya know it's our time ¶

(Raven laughs)

Yep! That's us.

¶ ¶

(horn blows)

Oh, we're getting
closer and closer, Rae!

(Chelsea laughs)

(motor sputtering)

We're getting
further and further, Rae!

-That's because
we stopped, Chels!
-What?!

-Chelsea?
-Yeah?

Did you get a Jet Ski
that had no gas in it?

I got a Jet Ski
that had a key!

Maybe it had a key

because the gas tank was
on "E."

Did you notice that, Chels?

Yes, yes I did.

But there are countries

where you drive
on the opposite side,

so you know,
maybe "E" stands for "enough."

¶ ¶

Booker:
Okay, this is it. Room 4002.

Nia: Okay,
I will turn on a light,

so we can relish
in the luxury.

Booker:
Ah yeah! Okay!

(Booker screams)

Really? This, right here,

was gonna protect us?

Well, what are
we gonna do?

We're on a cruise
with no adults telling us
what to do.

Yo, it's like one
of those '90s movies
our parents used to watch.

We're Boat Alone.

(yelling)

Let's go have
some fun, people!

All right, you guys
go figure out a plan

while I go get us
some food.

-Okay.
-Ah yeah!

This buffet's
about to get Booker'd!

All:
¶ Uh-huh, uh-huh,
uh, Booker'd! ¶

(rattling)

-(Raven grunts)
-(Chelsea sighs)

Come on, come on, Rae!

Quit it! It's no use!

Pushing that thing
isn't gonna start the Jet Ski!

We're stuck! Oh!

Hey, hey, hey, hey!

Hey, maybe I can signal
to the ship from here!

Hey! Hey! Hey!

-No, Chelsea!
Stop it, Chelsea!
-We're stuck!

-We're stuck!
-Chelsea, sit down!

-(screams)
-Sit down, Chelsea!

You are about to tip us over!

All right?
Calm down, okay?

Maybe, um...
Maybe we'll call for help.

All right. Let me just, uh...
Let me just get my phone.

-(Chelsea shrieks)
-Oh! Okay, okay.

All right, we won't do that.
We won't do that.

-How about I steady it...
-Okay.

-...and you get my phone.
-All right.

-Okay, you ready?
-It's in that front thing.

-Just be careful, please.
-Okay.

Okay. Go.

I'm just gonna get over you.

-Steady it. Steady!
-I'm steadying! I'm steady!

-Steady! Steady! Okay!
-(Raven grunting)

-Okay! All right!
-No. Chelsea. Chelsea!

-I'm getting it!
I'm almost done!
-Just be-- Just...

-(both grunting)
-Chelsea: Whoa!

I got it! I got it!
I got it! I got it!

(both panting)

Okay. All right,
I'm gonna call the cops.

They still have
the same number, right?

Yeah, I'm sure
they do, Chels.

(keypad beeps)

While you're
on that phone,

why don't you tell them
that these fish look suspicious.

I think one of them
just side-eyed me.

Hi. Yes, I'd like
to report a missing person.

Uh, people.

No, no. Me and my friend,
we're missing.

Calling from?

Hey, Rae,
where are we calling from?

A Jet Ski in the middle
of the ocean!

Oh. Did you hear that? Okay.

-Um, what do I see?
-What?

That's funny
you should say that, actually.

I see sea! (laughs)

Hold on. Let me see.
(clears throat)

They want to know
if we can get the number
for the Jet Ski company,

because maybe
they can locate us
on their GPS.

-Good idea,
good idea. Um...
-Yeah.

Okay. Hold on.
I'm just gonna check
one side over here.

No, it's not over there.

No, I don't see it. Let me look
on the other side over here.

Hold on. Hold... (yells)

Okay, okay.

The good news is, Rae,

I found the number
of the Jet Ski company.

-The bad news--
-I know the bad news, Chels!

I'm back!

(cheering)

Did you know, there are
three buffets on every deck?

Well, there are. Eat up!

-We got eight more to go.
-Okay.

Awesome!

Now, I was meant
to live a life of leisure.

Hey, this food is
awesome and all,

but your mom said
this cruise was a...

uh, what was the word?

A paradise.

Yeah, didn't she say
something about a tween disco?

I could be down with that.

She also mentioned
games and prizes.

-Now, uh,
I don't play games...
-Hmm?

-...but I'm down
for some prizes.
-Okay! Okay!

And I definitely saw a pool
when we were sneaking down here,

and I've always wanted to float
on a giant pink flamingo.

You know what I need?
I need a swimsuit.

I could use some board shorts.

And I could use
a surf board.

(chuckles)
On a... on a cruise ship?

We're unsupervised.

And all we gotta do,
is show them this,

and we can buy
whatever we want.

This place is amazing!
You sure we're not
in heaven?

Yeah, behind that door
is a combination toilet-shower.

-We're not in heaven.
-(groans)

Oh, Rae!
Rae, I see it.

I see it,
and the light's still on,

which means they still might be
able to track our location.

It's right there.
Just gotta... get to it.

That's not my phone,
Chels.

That's the sun
reflecting off the water.

Oh!

Huh. Oh,
it's so beautiful.

Chels, you always
manage to make the best
out of the worst situation.

-Oh.
-Remember when
Devon and I broke up,

you were like, uh...
(chuckles)

-"More closet space for you."
-(laughs)

Okay, Chels,

let's live to tell
our grandkids about this.

-Yeah. Yeah.
-Okay.

Um, how about this?

-How about we paddle...
-Okay.

...with our shoes back to shore.

Oh, well, I don't know
why we don't just... (grunts)

...use these, uh,
emergency oars, huh?

-You just... Huh?
-Chels, Chels! Those are not
emergency oars!

That is a part
of the Jet Ski!

You are dismantling
the one thing that's
keeping us alive!

Okay, okay!

All right, let me just snap
these bad boys back on.

-Put them on, Chels!
-All right, they're on!

¶ ¶

Man, I don't know
when we'll get saved,

-but I'm gonna look good
when we do.
-Yeah.

(steel drum playing
Caribbean music)

All right, come on, dude.
Let's go find that wave pool.

Uh, Booker...
A little help here?

Dude... swag.

¶ ¶

Turn up! (chuckles)

¶ ¶

Booker/Levi:
Yeah!

-Go low, baby.
-Booker: Get it! Get it!

-Go, low, baby! Yes!
-Get it! Get it!

-Here we go.
-Just a little more.

(grunting)

-(cheering)
-(laughing)

Whoa!

(grunting)

-Ah!
-Others: Ay!

Guys, this is
so much fun.

And nobody even knows
who we are.

-Levi Grayson?
-I'm out.

A girl's gotta do
what a girl's gotta do.

You're Chelsea's son, Levi.

I've seen your picture
in her phone.

So. Many. Pictures.

Ha. So...
Who. Are. You?

I'm Bailey,
your mom's boss.

I've looked
for her everywhere,

and she's not returning any
of my texts or phone calls.

V-rude.

I have a note for your mom.

Do I leave it with you
or one of your peeps?

Uh, I'll take it.

I've gotta set up
for my next presentation.

Is that one
of my lip kitties?

Tabby, put it down!

-I can't believe this!
-I know!

Who even uses notes anymore?

No! My mom's gonna get fired

by the most influential
21-year-old in the country!

That's what she wrote.

It also says Aunt Chelsea
has one more chance
with her seminar today.

Otherwise, she's out
like Nia should have been

after that
veggie platter incident.

Really? That's
what the note said?

Guys, we've got to save
my mom's job.

¶ ¶

¶ ¶

Remember that night we came up
with the Mom Commandments?

(laughs)
You stood on the couch
with a staff

and recited them to the kids.

Yeah, I wish I had
that staff right now.

I would stick it into the water,
part the ocean,

and walk right to that boat!

Well, that would be good.

My legs are stronger
than my arms. (chuckles)

That would explain
why you're not paddling.

Oh!
Oh, I'm sorry!

I just got so caught up
in our stories.

(sighs)
Chelsea, I'm tired.

You know, Rae,
one day we're gonna...

we're gonna look back
on this day and laugh.

Yeah, but not today.

I know we're gonna
get through this, Rae.

You and me can never be
defeated, huh?

Mm-hmm.

¶ ¶

Okay, before I do
my mom's presentation,

I need to get in her head.

Quick, does anyone have
a red wig?

Levi, you've got this.

All right?
Just like we rehearsed.

You're right.
Bring in the crowd.

Schmop presentation!

Free pizza!

Free puppies!

Uh, meet Chris Pratt!

Meet Chris Pratt!

What? He's everybody's
favorite Chris.

(crowd murmuring)

Ladies and gentlemen!

The incomparable

Chelsea... Grayson!

Thank you, thank you.

Welcome, everyone.
My name is Levi Grayson,

the son of Schmop creator,
Chelsea Grayson.

As part
of today's presentation,

I'm gonna have
my lovely assistant

pour food and drinks
all over the floor.

Ooh, that's gonna
be a big mess.

-Tess: Oh, no, don't!
-Kids: No!

Nia:
Oh! That's so messy!

Tess:
How are we supposed
to clean it?

And now my assistant will take
his trusty Schmop

and effortlessly clean up
the mess he made.

Baby man, where the heck
is your mama?

I got friends on board
who want their free Schmop.

And since you're offering,
I want my puppy.

And that fine Chris Pratt.

Crowd (chanting):
Puppies, pizza, Pratt!

Puppies, pizza, Pratt!
Puppies, pizza, Pratt!

¶ ¶

(floodlight clicks)

Huh?

Chels, it's happened.

What?

The light...

No! Rae!

The kids!
What about our kids?!

Oh, the kids! The kids!
That's right. No, mm-mm.

There's no light that's going
to keep me from my kids!

-MAN (over speaker): Ladies!
-(gasps)

What? What's going on?

It's the light, Chels!
It's coming to get us!
Don't go in the light!

-Don't go in the light!
-I can't help it, Rae!

It's so warm and welcoming.

I don't want
to hear that, Chels!

I got kids to see!

I got kids to see, Chels,
and it's not my time!

Captain:
This is the Coast Guard.

-Both: What?
-Captain: We're here
to save you.

(screaming and cheering)

Oh my gosh!
Oh, it's military men, Rae!

How do I look?

Chels, I can't believe
that's the one thing
on your mind right now!

You look like you've been
asleep on a Jet Ski

for nights and nights!

-Hand me that
pink mango lipstick.
-You got it.

¶ ¶

Crowd (chanting):
Puppies, pizza, Pratt!
Puppies, pizza, Pratt!

Look, I love you babies,

but this presentation stinks!

Where's Chelsea Grayson?

Hey, be patient, people!

Hey, everybody,
stay in your seats!

The boat's moving!

Whoa, wait! She's here!

-(crowd muttering)
-Woman: Will I get
my money back?

My mom is right here
in my heart.

And so is the secret
to real wealth.

Hold on, now. The baby man
has something to say.

Go ahead, sweetie.

I can't believe I have

the Chelsea Grayson
on my ship!

(laughing)
Yep, it's me!

In the flesh!

Um, how do you know me?

How do I know...?

Well, you invented the Schmop!

You've changed the lexicon
of the Coast Guard!

And soon, the Navy!

We don't say,
"Swab the deck" anymore.

We say, "Schmop the deck."

And the hairstyle known
as the mop top?

It's the Schmop top.

Oh, right!
You know what?

Schmop
with the Schmop-talk.

(laughing)
Schmop-talk.
That's a good one, Rae.

Can I use that?

Well, I'm sure
if you asked her nicely...

Kids, Chels. Kids!

-Yeah.
-I'm cold, right?

I've been waiting
to see my kids!

I've been sitting
on the ocean for six days!

Six days?
More like two hours.

My journey, sir.
My journey.

(Chelsea shivers)

Well, I checked
with Homeland Security,

and we can't intercept
a cruise ship
for a non-emergency.

Can you drop us off
at the shore in Miami?

Yeah, that's where
the cruise ship is heading.

Miami is out of our patrol zone.

-We're gonna have to take
you back to New York.
-Chelsea: What?

Any other destination
would require a heli-Schmopter.

¶ ¶

¶ ¶

That's right, the secret
to real wealth is inspiration.

And I am the inspiration...

for the Schmop.

His mom needed to keep him
as far from the mess
as possible.

Thus, the invention
of the Schmop.

Yes, Lil' Levi was
with his mom

through the whole process.

And she was always with me.

And so was my Auntie Rae.

Together, our moms are inspired.

And maybe their
"Mom Commandments"
will inspire you.

-Whoo!
-Uh-huh.

-If thou sayest it...
-Uh-huh.

...thy child will repeat it!

Oh, talk to me now!

And if thou wear-est white,

thy child shall have
something on their hands.

-They gotta have!
Gotta have!
-Amen!

Hey, how about,
housework won't kill you,

but why take the chance?

I'm sorry,
that was my mom.

But I do hear this one a lot
from Ms. B and Ms. G,

Thou breaks it,

thou's gotta buy it.

-(applause)
-(murmurs of assent)

Okay, okay, babies.

Now, that's all gold,

but how's it going
to make me rich?

Miss Bertha, if my mom taught
me anything,

it's that if you love someone
enough to sacrifice for them,

inspiration will come to you

and then you'll finally find
true wealth.

(applause)

That was the wow factor
I was looking for.

Where is your mom, Levi?
She needs to take a bow.

Sadly, we have been
separated from our moms.

Last we saw them, they were
on a pier back in New York.

I really miss my mom.

Oh!

I'm a mom and a grandmother.

And I wish my kids
wanted to see me

as bad as this little one
wants to see his mama.

Turn this boat around now!

Find their moms!

Booker (chanting):
Find their moms!

Crowd (chanting):
Find their moms!
Find their moms!

-You know what?
-What?

-If they're not gonna
help us get our kids...
-Yeah.

-...we're gonna
have to help ourselves.
-Yeah, listen.

I think we passed
some lifeboats on the way in.

Good idea, Chels.
Good idea!

You know what? On the count
of three, we make a run for it.

-Okay. Yeah.
-Ready? Okay.

One...

two...

-Whoa!
-Ahoy there, ladies!

You can't just be
Schmoping up in here.

Schmoping "Ahoy," you Schmop.

-You can't do that!
-Yeah!

My apologies.

I just thought
I'd let you know that, um,

your kids are
apparently starting

some kind of commotion
on the cruise ship.

(gasps)
Rae, our kids,
they started a mutiny!

-(gasps) That's exactly
what we would've done.
-Yeah!

I wouldn't call it
a mutiny exactly,

but the captain has put out
an emergency call for help.

-What does that mean?
-What? Yeah.

It means you ladies
may just get
your ride to that boat.

-Come with me.
-Both: Yes!

Oh, it's okay!
We're gonna find the babies.

We're gonna find them.
We'll be...

We'll be right there.
We got it, yeah.

¶ ¶

Crowd (chanting):
Find their moms!
Find their moms!

Find their moms!

Listen up, people!

The captain wants you
to know that he has put out
an emergency call.

(cheering)

But he doesn't know
where these mothers are,

and he can't move
heaven and earth to find them.

(booing)

Look...

even if we could find them,

you can't just get
on or off a boat

in the middle of the ocean!
It's impossible!

Raven:
Nothing's impossible
when you're a mother!

-(helicopter whirring overhead)
-(crowd gasping)

Kids:
Mom?!

(screams)
Kids, kids! I'm here!

I'm here!

Chelsea, your son is right here!

Just open your eyes
and get a move on!

I can't help it, Rae!

I have a fear
of heights, ladders,

you know, strong winds!

Rae, help me!

That was my vision!

Come on down!

Hold the ladder, kids!
Hold the ladder steady!

Hold the ladder!

(squealing, laughing)

Oh, Levi!

Oh!

-Mom...
-Yeah?

I really tried my best
to save your job.

Oh honey, listen to me, okay?

Being your mother is
the only job I want.

I missed you, Mom.

Oh, honey.

Oh, I missed you, too.

Family hug!

Uh, um...
(clears throat)

I said, "family hug."

(giggles)

Come here.

Chelsea:
Aww.

Hold on, let me
get some of this.

-Nia: Bertha!
-Booker: Ay!

¶ ¶

-Booker: Move!
-Nia: Whoop!

Chels, the surfboard is
bigger than he is.

Hey, he insisted
on carrying it.

Oh! Oh, I missed my plant!

Mwah! (giggles)

Oh, I missed all these photos!

Ooh, I do not miss
cleaning that kitchen.

Tess, you left
the kitchen a mess!

Hey, it was either
save the day

or clean the kitchen.

Oh, I'm so happy to be home!

I missed you!
I missed you so much!

You know what, Chels?
We need to talk.

(clears throat)
You might need to sleep
on the couch

for a couple of days,
because I've been using

your bed as a...
as a third closet.

¶ ¶

(harp music playing on TV)

(snores softly)

Oh.

You're here.

You're here.

(chuckles)
That's right.

And I'm not going anywhere.

¶ ¶