Pretty Freekin Scary (2023–…): Season 1, Episode 5 - Locker Life - full transcript

Hey, bestie.
O-M-G, samesies!

Heads up, you might
want to switch scrunchies.

Stephanie Murdock
is wearing a pink one today.

Oh, thanks for
having my back, bestie.

Back at you, bestie.

Teeth?

Hair?

Lips?

Fierce. O-M-G!

We're so in sync!

-Bye.
-Bye.



Oh, hey, you!

Hey...

Yeah.

Oh. You go first.

Oh, no, after you.

Oh.

-Go ahead.
-No, no.

This isn't working.

O-m-g.

Samesies.

Are you thinking
what I'm thinking?

Someone
needs to move out.

You. Me?

You were the one
gone for two weeks.



What? I didn't go
to sleepaway camp. I fell in a manhole.

I know. But I got used
to having my own space,

and taking care of our
locker-cactus Rodrigo.

I'm sorry but
you moved in with me.

I was assigned
this locker. It's legit mine.

Fine.

Then I'm taking the cat calendar
and the matching magnets.

I think this
will be good for us.

Yeah, in a "best friends
not being best friends" kind of way.

Nobody said
B-F-F meant "forever".

That's literally what
the second "F" stands for.

But we'll still see
each other in the halls.

It doesn't have
to be weird.

Totally not weird.

Hello!

What're you doing here?

Sorry.
Just give me a sec.

I'm saying goodbye
to the locker.

We have a deep
spiritual connection.

Okay. It got weird.

I'm a little busy right now.

Oh, relax.
No one can see me unless I want them to.

I have a task for you.

Oh, Grim.

Did you give me a gift?

Oh.

Sweetie, no,
that's not for you. I don't do gifts.

It's a talisman.
I want you to keep it with you

and await
further instructions.

Why not tell me now?

Well, the drama,
darling, the drama.

That's rude!

Are you finished talking
to the locker?

Yes, where were we?

Okay, I get the Harry Styles
coloring book,

you get the remaining portion
of the glitter nail polish.

And you keep
the scrunchies.

I want that for you.

Well, that's the last of it.

Wait.

We forgot about
the emergency lip gloss.

I should get it,
since I'm the one moving out.

But it goes with my eyes.

But I bought it.

It's my go-to for selfies.

Give me the gloss.

Yes!

What's going on here?

It's School Club Sign-Up Day!

Isn't this exciting?

I need some alone time.

I miss the Underworld.

It was so much quieter
than middle school.

Except for the screams
of souls going down.

Bowling club?

Huh. Yes, please.

Lacrosse.

Just try and stop me.

Quilting!

I'm in!

What's "quilting"?

Do you have any idea
what any of that is?

I do not.

But we never got
to do any of this in the Underworld.

And while I'm here,
I'm going to enjoy

everything
school has to offer.

Board Gamers Club!

This is a dream
come true!

Come on, Scary,
there must be a club you want to join.

Yeah, it's called
"the peace and quiet

"and away from
all these kids and you club".

Oh! I don't see that one.

Oh, Yoga Club!

Imagine that.
They have a club for eating yoga.

Well, that's yogurt.

Never mind.
He'll figure it out.

I'm gonna go eat
buffalo wings in my car

and then head
to the teacher's lounge.

Get away
from these animals.

Hmm, "lounge"?

"Away from these animals"?

Sounds like my kind of club.

No people, no noise.

Comfy chairs. Oh, I am in.

Free food?

Jackpot!

Is this heaven?

Uh, no, it's the, uh, teacher's lounge.

Oh, wow, and that is my string cheese.

Has my name on it.

Barbara. Yeah.

Well, Barbara, I'm here to join
your teacher's lounge club.

Yeah. I'm sorry. Yeah. No, students.

See, this is the place
that teachers go to get away from you.

Oh, well, not specifically you,

but just you as a group.

That's not fair.

I finally found a place
where I can relax.

This is where I belong.

Oh, yeah, life's not fair.

I mean, you put your name
on your string cheese

and expect no one will eat it.

You're still hanging on to that?

Get out!

And she took my cheese.

Can't even find
a place to sit anymore.

Look at Layla
smiling and laughing

and eating her tuna melt,

like it's any other tuna melt Tuesday.

It's like she cared
more about that lip gloss

than she did
about our friendship.

Losing the locker
is one thing,

but losing
a best friend is worse.

Plus, my lips are totally chapped.

Hey, thanks for listening to me vent.

It really helps.

Oh, hi.

Seriously?

I've just been baring my soul.

Sorry.

Blocking people out
with loud music is my happy place.

Why are you carrying
a backpack the size of a minivan?

That's what I was trying to tell you.

Layla and I decided

-not to share a locker anymore.
-She kicked you out?

-We mutually decided.
-To kick you out?

No, I kicked me out.

Never mind.
I'm too tired to rehash the whole thing.

I'm moving back
into my old locker.

Yeah, that's probably
not gonna work.

When you... You know.

They turned it into
a bubble gum shrine in your honor.

Aw.

And ew.

It used to say,
"We love you, Frankie."

Now it's just an unsanitary glob.

Miss you, Frankie.

I'm right here.

What am I gonna do?

I can't go back to my old locker.
I don't have a new locker.

Normally when
I have a problem,

I talk to my best friend,
but I don't even have her.

See, this is why
I don't get close to people.

Relationships are messy.

That's easy for you to say.
You're a lone wolf.

But I'm not. I'm a social animal.

Like those adorable
meerkats that all cuddle up together.

I'm a cuddler.

Hey, tomorrow
is a chance for a better day.

Really?

I don't know. I saw it in a card

when my mom
got her appendix out.

I mean, if I don't
have a locker, do I even exist?

It's like I can't go back,
but I can't go forward.

I'm stuck.

I think you're
being a little dramatic.

No, really. I'm stuck
to this stupid locker.

I knew this was gonna get messy.

Hey, what's this?

"Need a locker,
call the locker broker."

I think this might
be the answer to your problems.

-Nyx!
-Sorry.

The trash can
is way over there.

Not now. Remy,
I'm waiting for someone.

I know. Sorry I'm late.

I had another showing
across campus and traffic was crazy.

My card.

You're the locker broker?

Yep, I have a lot of side hustles.

A kid's gotta earn.

Real estate's a good game.

Plus, when else am I gonna wear this
burgundy blazer Aunt Peggy gave me.

You do look professional.

How do you know
so much about lockers?

'Cause I keep
my finger on the pulse.

Fortunately for me, business is booming.

Maybe this isn't such a good idea.

I feel we are paying
you for something I should get for free.

We're family.
You don't have to pay me cash.

I also take crypto.

Let me help you.
A locker isn't just a locker.

It's a place
you call home.

Says right here,
on the back of the card.

Walk with me.

Whoa! Remy, it's perfect.

I'll take it.

You wish.
That's my floor model.

So what amenities are you looking for?

Furnished, unfurnished,

close to the good bathroom?

Got anything near the cafeteria?

Yeah, right.
That's prime real estate.

Okay, here we are.

This beauty
just came up on the market.

Isn't this Jennifer Langston's locker?

Yes, but she just moved in
with her best friend.

So it's a sublet.

Jen Langston,
she is a locker hopper.

I'll be out on my butt
in a week.

I mean, hopefully things work out
better for her and her bestie,

but sometimes things
just blow up in your face

and you're left
with a bunch of scrunchies.

Feels good that I can talk
to my brother about these things.

Yeah. I don't have time
to be your brother. I'm on the clock.

I have a better idea. You're fired.

-As your brother or as your broker?
-Both.

Hi, roomie.

Frankie. It's me, Pretty.

I know, but if we were sharing a locker,

it would be our fun nickname.

That would be a fun nickname.

I do. I will.

Whatever you say when
somebody asks you to share a locker.

I'm not sure what's happening here.

You just asked me
to share your locker, and I said yes.

Right. When can you move in, roomie?

Now.

Whoa. That's a lot.

Do you not want to move in?

Oh, no, I'll make it work.

Speaking of work,
Grim was looking for you.

Something about one of your tasks.

Right.

What am I supposed to do with this?

Put in our locker, roomie.

Gotta go to Italian Club. Ciao.

Uh, I told you students aren't
allowed in the teacher's lounge.

This is our sacred space.

I brought donuts.

Oh, the girl can stay.

Whoa, that's not just glazed.

It's an assortment.

Victor, give her the recliner.

I don't know how
to deal with the Webber kid.

He keeps disrupting class.

I've tried building trust.

I've tried
setting expectations and accountability.

I've even tried empathy
and pretended that I care.

Nothing works.

You could try taking
his phone for the day.

Back where I'm from
in the Underwo...

I mean, the down under,

he'd be tossed into
the eternal pit of doom.

"Eternal pit of doom."
It's classic.

Yeah.

You know, but that phone thing
might actually work.

Thanks.

Want some of my, uh, string cheese?

You know I do, Babs.

Look...
I could use some advice

on a little motor mouth in my class.

Lay it on me.

Now...

Stay...

Stay...

You don't know what "stay" means?

I joined Tap Dance Club
and got these loud shoes.

They make my feet sound happy.

Wow, a little goes a long way.

Oh, you cleared out some space.

Now there's room for my handsaw.

I didn't know you
were taking wood-shop.

Oh, no, I'm in magic club.

Hey, we're looking
for volunteers to be cut in half.

As fun as that sounds, no.

Now it's time for lacrosse.

I don't think
this locker thing is gonna work.

Hey, maybe
the locker broker can help.

He's got a bench ad?

How has nobody drawn
a moustache on that?

Whoa! Is that all schoolwork?

Half schoolwork,
half emotional baggage.

Yeah, I heard about
the locker breakup. How you holding up?

Not good.
I thought Layla was a true friend.

I get it. As a Snickering, I never know

if people like me for me
or my backyard waterslide.

You have a waterslide
in your backyard?

It might sound great,
but man does it chafe.

Look, I know it's hard to believe,

but having your family's name

on everything
in town isn't easy.

Try being once dead.

Okay, you win.

Erlic, can I tell
you something?

Sure.

I always thought you saw yourself
as better than everyone else.

Only because I am.

I'm kidding.

But I really did think
the same thing about you.

Well, it seems we were both wrong.

Okay, class, we got new textbooks.

Ooh! Oh, they're so heavy.

You gotta be kidding me.

Tell a friend.

Live that locker life.

Need a locker? I'm your guy.

You're hired again.

I knew you'd be back.

They always come crawling back.

Just give me
Jennifer Langston's locker.

Sorry, no can do.

Somebody already snapped it up.

I told you, this market is white hot.

But, I can
get you a deal, on a fixer-upper.

No, way! It looks like a crime scene.

The previous owner
got upset after a bad report card.

But with
a touch of paint and some TLC,

it'll feel like home.

Check it out, get a feel for it.

But don't take too long.
I've got other offers.

Hello!

Frankie, open this locker.

I'm suffocating in here.

What are you doing in this janky locker?

Um, just getting my books.

And rude B-T-W.

My bad.

Love what you've done with the place.

Great. Now I look like a freak.

Well, your hair could
use a little zhuzh.

Now, I've been looking all over for you.

I went to your old locker.

I stopped by the gym.

I even popped by
that gross gum locker.

There is, like,
an inch of saliva in there.

Is this about the task?

No! No, no, no.
I just stopped by to say hi.

Of course, this is about the task!

I need you to sneak the talisman
into Erlic Snickering's bag.

But...

Erlic can't know.
So you need to be discreet.

Why couldn't the task be
to go on his waterslide?

And why Erlic's bag?

It's a good question.

And none of your business.

Wait.

He has a waterslide?

I know, right?

This is nice.

You and me talking like besties.

What is happening?

Yeah.

This is gonna sound weird,
but I'm glad to see you.

Since I came back
from the Underworld,

things have been different.

It's not just the locker sitch.

I never realized how much
I took Layla's friendship for granted.

And it's not just
the fun texts and cute emojis.

Without her,
I just feel kind of alone.

Oh, sweetie, I'm here for you.

Not right now, though.

I need to get out of this locker,

these gym socks
really stink, so, toodles.

Toodles.

Come on, Erlic, where are you?

Frankie, you didn't
happen to see a rabbit, did you?

White, long ears, big nose.

He's adorable,
but he's got a mean streak.

Ow!
-Oh, I think I know where he is.

Are you following me?

What? No.
I have better things to do.

Relax, Frankie. I was kidding.

I can't tell
because you always look so serious.

Yep. Resting Snickering face.

But I'm working on it.

I like that.
But I was thinking more like this.

I love that emoji.
You want some help with that?

Yes, please.

I've been carrying
this thing around all day.

I just need to drop
my bag in my locker,

and I can take
your backpack wherever you need to go.

Perfect.

What do you have in here?

It's size of a minivan.

You know, books, scrunchies,

a cactus, everything but lip gloss.

-Is someone flying a drone?
-Where?

Gah! Missed it.

Can I help you?

Oh! Uh, just admiring your locker.

It's so spacious.

I think I know what's going on here.

You do? I can explain.

Wait, I can't explain.

-But what I can tell you...
-You wanna share a locker with me.

What?

Look, Frankie,

I'm flattered, but I just don't think
we're ready for that step.

What step?
Who's stepping? I wasn't stepping.

I don't wanna
rush the locker share.

I know better than
anyone the locker bond is sacred.

Yeah, I hear ya.

But seriously
was someone flying a drone?

Gene, you're
more than just a teacher.

You're a person.

But so are your students.

And they've got problems, too.

Learn to say, "I hear you".

You're right. I will.

And if that doesn't work,
toss them into the eternal pit of doom.

Ah, that never gets old, Scary.
You are a hoot.

Well, this, "hoot"
is gonna take a power nap,

unless someone else
has anything they wanna talk about?

Okay.

Oh, Principal Peppers.

Would anyone
care to tell me what's going on here?

It's called the "share circle".
Would you like to join?

No, I would not.

Everybody out.

Uh, not so fast, young lady,
you and I are gonna have a little talk.

"Scary", is it?

I hear you're the go-to for advice.

I need some, for a friend.

So, I'm not in trouble?

Let's just hear your advice first.

This friend is having trouble
dealing with their teenage daughter.

She puts up
so many walls, tunes everyone out,

won't accept my friend request.

I mean...

I mean, my friend's
friend requests.

That's normal. Teen years are rough.

It's really my daughter.

Spoiler alert.

Since moving to Snickering Willows,

it's been an adjustment
for both of us.

All she's ever known is living in
a big city, and it's been hard for her.

Oh, I just wish Nyx
would make a friend.

Whoa. Your daughter is Nyx?

Yep, she doesn't like anyone knowing
her mom's the principal.

Look, I know from experience,

it's not easy being from another place
and dealing with change.

But Nyx is gonna be okay.

You just need
to give her some space.

I'm sure
she'll find a friend who gets her.

Thanks, Scary.

I appreciate the advice.

I'll tell you what? Even though
you're not supposed to be here,

I guess I can look
the other way for now.

Just stay out of the fridge.

If I have to hear
about Barbara's cheese one more time...

That's okay.

I was planning on finding
a new hangout anyway.

I want some peace and quiet.

Teachers are way too needy.

Ugh, tell me about it.

-Ooh! Donuts!
-Stop.

Yep, I'm losing it.

Before you say anything,

I know I'm not supposed
to be here, but...

Donuts.

I'm gonna have to bring
that recliner in here.

I give up.

You're not the only person in
this place that feels like an outsider.

Yeah, but you're one by choice.

I'll probably regret this,

but you can share my...

Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!

...locker.

But, are you sure?

Nope. But I already
cleared space for you.

Don't make a thing out of it.

And do not call me roomie.

I realized something.

Oh, no, you're not gonna
make a speech, are you?

Just a tiny one.

Whether or not you
wanna admit it,

you're a good friend.

And I was so focused
on losing Layla as a friend,

I didn't realize
I was making a new one.

-Don't say me.
-You.

We are gonna be great...

Locker-share-people.

Teeth?

Hair?

Lips?

I have no idea
what that is, but I'm not doing it.

Cool. Cool.

We'll find our own thing.

Congratulations on your new locker.

Thanks.

You're the one who drew the mustache
on my bench ad, aren't you?

Yep.

You wore your
tap shoes all the way home?

At first it was new and wonderful,

now the tapping haunts me.

Hey, can I try those?

Sure.

I don't think you're using those right.

But thanks.