Parenthood (2010–2015): Season 4, Episode 1 - Family Portrait - full transcript

I've always loved you, I never
stopped loving you.

Will you still marry me?

- Yes, I will marry you.
- Yeah?

I just have to tell you
that I got into Cornell.

Haddie, congratulations.
That's fantastic.

- I'm so proud. I really am.
- Thank you.

His mother's been incarcerated.

She's released the rights
of her child

to keep him out
of the foster system.

This is Victor.

Hi.



Sarah Braverman,
will you marry me?

Lyla Hershfeld.

Mom, you are not
seriously comparing

my relationship with Mark
to Lyla Hershfeld.

Crosby swore she was the one.

And they broke up
two weeks later.

Yet there she is for all
eternity in our family picture.

Mom...

They were 24.
She wore a crop top.

Anyone could have
seen that coming.

Mark and I are engaged.

Uhhuh, yeah.
Where's the ring?

- We're working on it.
- Yeah.

You guys, be careful.



Drew... Amy likes you
just the way you are.

Mom, please.

Sarah, would you not
distract him?

He's starting to bulk up
for Amy's homecoming, all right?

- So how's the job hunt coming?
- Great, dad, great.

- Really?
- No, dad.

I'm trying to transition
out of bartending.

It's rough out there.
Five more.

Mom, please.

Family only, that's the policy.

You can thank your brother
Crosby for that.

Brought a creamer, sweetie.

Hey.

Hey, honey, I made brunch.

I made French toast and bacon.

It's well-done,
the way you like it.

You remember that I said
I was gonna make brunch?

Yeah, I'm good
with this, Julia.

Hey, your mom has spent
a lot of time

putting this stuff together.

Um, sweetie.

Victor, I would really
appreciate it if you didn't...

when you're done watching
the show,

if you didn't watch it
when Sydney's around, okay?

Yeah, cool.

How come he gets to watch TV?

Syd!

- Well, it's not fair.
- Come here.

And how come he gets to eat
in front of the TV, too?

Sydney, it's brunch.
Come here.

Syd, Syd.

I don't wanna go all the way
to burger and pie.

What are you talking about?

Burger and pie is our place.
We love burger and pie.

- When I was eight years old.
- Yeah, honey.

Do you remember that time
she leaned over the backseat

and was like, "I know,
let's go to burger and pie."

I was eight and I don't care.

I have to spend time
with my friends.

This is the last week.

Both: ♪ let's all go.
- Stop!

Both: ♪ to burger and pie.
- Stop!

It's the last week
before I leave.

Exactly, it's time
to spend with family.

Honey, look, I know that
there's a lot to do,

which I was thinking we should
meet before burger and pie,

get your winter coat...
just listen.

- No.
- That's a great idea, honey.

- Get it out of the way.
- I can't. I don't need a coat.

Do you know how cold
it is there?

Every other day,
I'm with the grandparents

or with the aunts or some...
or it's a dumb photo shoot.

I need time on my own...

It's not a dumb photo shoot.

- With my friends.
- Okay? It's really not.

All of your grandparents,
everybody wants to see you.

Your aunts and uncles, okay?
It's fine.

Everyone's getting together
for you.

And I also think that you should
schedule some time for Max.

I thought that's what
burger and pie was.

No, burger and pie
is family time.

I want you and Max to have
a little time together.

Okay, I'll do it.

You have no idea, those
east coast winters are brutal.

- Ugh.
- Maybe that's the reason

that everyone at Cornell
kills themselves.

- Wind whips in your face.
- Oh, my God.

- That's not true, Max.
- Yeah, it is dad.

- No, it's not.
- Yes, it is.

I saw it online.
It's a rumor.

- People there jump off...
- Hey, can we stop?

Your sister's not gonna
jump off a bridge.

I'll jump off a bridge
if I stay here.

- You need a coat.
- That doesn't make any sense.

- Exactly.
- Exactly.

♪ all I want

♪ is someone

♪ someone I can hold on

♪ someone I can count on

♪ someone to dance
with me ♪

♪ all I want

♪ is someone

♪ someone I can hold on

♪ someone I can count on

♪ someone to dance
with me ♪

Sorry to interrupt the jam.

But I have lunch options.

Oh, look who it is,
my favorite item

- on the luncheonette menu.
- Yes-is me?

- You.
- I am?

- Yes.
- Gosh.

It's not Crosby?
I mean, he's pretty tasty.

Yeah, Crosby's pretty tasty,
but yeah.

- I think you got him beat.
- Thank you.

All right. Let's see.

Just make sure you write
your name next to it

because otherwise,
I won't know whose is which.

All right.

Yeah, all right.

That looks like
a pretty good order.

- Yeah?
- Yeah, see if you approve.

Very good choice.

Thank you.

For you?

Hello.

I'm here to leave a deposit

for the Braverman
family portrait.

You can put it on the table.
Thank you.

- Over here? Okay.
- Yeah.

You won't forget, though,
right?

My mother doesn't trust
me with this.

It's such a big group
to get together.

It's, like, 17 or 18 of us,
we're not sure.

In fact, can I ask
your opinion actually,

as the family portrait guy?

Do fiancee normally get included
in the family portrait?

I don't really care.

17 or 18...
I don't charge by the head,

so it's totally up to you.

- Okay.
- Okay.

All right. Thanks.

Help wanted, huh?

- Yeah.
- Is that for real?

I mean, it's just so retro,
you know,

- now with the Internet.
- Yeah. Yeah.

I mean, did you put it up
and forget it was there...?

It's real.
I have it on the Internet also.

You never know when
a genius is gonna walk by.

Uh, speaking of which, I, um...

I'm actually looking for a job.

- What's the job?
- Do you have experience?

- I do.
- 'Cause I need someone

with photography experience
only, so...

Yeah, of course.
My experience is from

a while ago.
I worked in graphics and, uh,

you know, mostly
on actual film photography.

The whole digital thing,
not so much.

Well, can you set up a shoot?

Change a lens, load a memory
card, adjust the lights?

Yeah, I can.

You worked in film?

- Yeah, uh, film mainly.
- That's a plus.

That's, uh... I like film.

Hm.

- All right.
- All right?

I can interview for the job?

I'll see you
tomorrow at 2:30.

You have a job tomorrow?

- Mm-hmm.
- That's amazing.

Oh, my God.
What's the pay?

I mean, should we
discuss the...

Let's see how you do tomorrow.

- Oh, okay.
- We'll figure it out.

It's a trial period.
I respect that.

I understand that.
Thank you so much.

- I'm Sarah, by the way.
- Hank.

Hank, this is amazing.

This is, like, meant to be.

- Don't you think?
- Oh, we shall see.

- Should I take the sign down?
- No, leave it.

All right.

I have a good feeling
about this.

- Thanks, Hank.
- See you tomorrow.

2:30, yeah.

♪ May God bless
and keep you always ♪

♪ and may your wishes
all come true ♪

♪ May you always do
for others ♪

♪ and let others do for you

♪ May you build a ladder
to the stars ♪

♪ and climb on every rung

♪ and may you stay

♪ forever young

♪ May you grow up
to be righteous ♪

♪ May you grow up
to be true ♪

♪ May you always know
the truth ♪

♪ and see the lights
surrounding you ♪

♪ May you always be
courageous ♪

♪ stand upright
and be strong ♪

♪ and may you stay

♪ forever young

♪ May you stay

♪ forever young

Alright, now this is Guacamole.

He was my first lizard.

And as you can see,
he's still alive.

- Can I hold him?
- No, it's too risky.

You don't know
anything about him.

And I really don't
know much about you.

Sydney and Jabbar
are different.

I let them hold him sometimes.
Like, I can trust them.

They've been around longer.

I mean, technically
you're my cousin,

but you're adopted,
so it's different.

I mean, you're not really even
part of the family yet.

Let's put him back.

Now let us see
my Guinea pig Rupert.

Okay, Max.

I just can't believe
that he hired you

and expects you to go on
a photo shoot tomorrow

- with no experience.
- Well...

- That's crazy.
- He doesn't exactly know

- I have no experience.
- You lied?

You've never lied
in a job interview?

Of course you haven't.
God, I don't know.

Anyway, he's a very weird,
grumpy guy.

Who knows if
it'll even work out?

Well, I, um...
I look forward to meeting him

at the big family portrait.

What, are you choking on
that awkward segue?

Yeah.

I pride myself
on my awkward segues.

Um, did you, um... did you
talk to your mom about it?

- Of course.
- Okay.

Look, it was
an old girlfriend of Crosby's

who wrecked it for all of us.

My mother will not change
her mind. I tried.

Okay.
It's just a weird policy.

I mean...
Just makes me feel like.

I-I'm not a part
of your guys' family...

- Oh, my God.
- Even though we're engaged

and...
You're part of the family.

It's a dumb rule.

You'll be in
the picture next year.

Okay.

Did you fight for me?

Oh, honey, I didn't realize
it was so important.

I-I mean, I kind
of didn't want to get

into a whole thing
with her, so...

- Oh, okay.
- I'm sorry.

So Kristina wasn't even
in the picture until they were...

- No.
- Okay, okay, okay.

- Good night, grandma.
- Oh, I love you, sweetie.

- I love you, too.
- Give me a kiss.

- Brush your teeth.
- Mm.

Okay.

- Oh, thanks, mom.
- I could eat him with a spoon.

Mm-hmm, he's yummy.

Yeah, and spiritual.

- He is.
- And... and... and prayerful.

Mom, we noticed that
Jabbar has been praying.

Oh, that's wonderful.

It is. It is.

Yeah, um, we were
just a little bit curious.

He told us
that you explained...

God and heaven
and praying to him.

Yes, and?

And we want him
to know about religion.

Absolutely, he must.

Hmm.
Well, must he?

I mean, other than
its historical context.

Crosby...

Well, I guess
what I'm getting at is,

you know, when you had
your children,

I can't imagine
you would have been thrilled

with your mother just bestowing
all of her religious ideals

onto your children.

And we feel like maybe that's
more our job as the parents.

Mom, we know it
came from a good place.

It's just that, you know,

I don't even go to church
any more really, so...

Oh, I definitely know that.

And we may not feel exactly
the same as you.

We think that maybe it's better

for you to just let us handle

talking to Jabbar
about the big questions.

I see.

Great.

Um, just out of curiosity,

what are you planning
to say to him?

And what is your belief system?

What's your doctrine?

Our doctrine...

Don't you think
the boy deserves

just a little bit
of clarity on the subject?

- You're awesome.
- Shut up.

- I'm serious.
- Shut up.

Here, you said
you could play guitar.

- Play me something.
- No, no, no.

- No, come on, come on.
- No, don't.

- This is so embarrassing.
- No, it's not.

You're a professional musician.

It's gonna sound very bad.

Come on, come on, come on,
come on.

Please, I wanna hear you.

Okay, here, you know what?

Actually, I do have
a little something...

All right,
let's hear this ditty.

I've been working on,
if you want to hear it.

- All right, ready?
- Yeah.

Okay.

Um, let me see how it goes.
It goes...

Yeah, I think it's this.

It goes...

♪ all I want is someone.
♪ is someone

Nice.

- Didn't see that coming, huh?
- That's good.

- ♪ all I want is someone.
- ♪ is someone

wait, here's the best part.

- F...
- I don't know it.

- ♪ someone I can hold on.
- ♪ someone I can

♪ someone...

- It needs a little work, right?
- Sounds good.

Sounds good.
See? I picked it up.

- Yeah, you're good.
- ♪ all I want is someone

do you want me to take the low?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Both: ♪ all I want

♪ is someone I can

Thank you.

- Good night, Chicago.
- Good night, Cincinnati.

Oh, nice.

Dang.

- That was really good.
- Thank you.

Okay, I'm gonna
shoot right here.

- Okay.
- Let's start with the 2470

and the canon 5d.

- The... which one?
- And get the hasselblad ready

in case I feel inspired

to, you know,
shoot some medium format.

- So, the...
- 2470.

First is... okay.

Mr. Rizzoli, hi.
We spoke on the phone.

I'm Trish. Nice to meet you.
Oh, hey.

Thank you so much for doing
this on such short notice.

I've heard such amazing things
about your work.

Well, let's just hope I don't
screw it up too much.

Oh, no, it will be perfect.

But it's just a hard time
for my family,

- so thank you.
- Okay.

It's not a good time
for the family?

Oh, we just lost my father.

Oh, my gosh, you're kidding me.

- That's... I'm so sorry.
- Thank you.

The family is just spread out
and we're finally all together,

so we just wanted
a picture, you know.

It's a beautiful way
to honor him.

Thanks.

And if there's anything
we can do, if you want us...

- Thank you.
- To stop and take a break or...

Oh, no, no, no more crying.

- Of course.
- Okay.

But thank you
for understanding.

I think it's
actually a nice jacket.

And it fits me.
It is the right...

- It's look good.
- I'm hungry. Let's just order.

Let's just order.
Haddie, you know,

if you don't like it,
we can exchange it.

Thank you.
Thanks for going...

- I'm just telling you.
- It's fine, you did a good job.

You know, I just wanna
go back to look for Guacamole.

Why, what happened
to Guacamole?

This is why you
need to go shopping.

- He was stolen.
- Nothing happened to Guacamole.

- He was not stolen.
- We don't know that.

Well, who would
steal Guacamole?

- Victor.
- Victor?

Oh, my goodness.
Victor would not...

Why do think that
Victor stole Guacamole?

...steal guacamole,
sweetheart, okay?

Okay, it's because...
Mom called us out for a snack.

I said that I liked it,
like, five times, mom.

And he was up there
alone with Guacamole.

When I got back up,
my lizard was gone.

- Mom.
- Max!

- Whoa, hey!
- Where is that waitress?

- I'm starving.
- Keep your voice down, okay?

- Hi.
- Hey.

Can I get you guys started
with a drink?

Uh, no, we're ready to order.

And we're starving
because you're very slow

- and your service is terrible.
- Max, that's not polite.

I want a torpedo burger
with no onions

and extra, extra, extra bacon...
just tons of bacon.

I'm so sorry, we don't have
the torpedo burger any more.

- No, that's ridiculous.
- Um, uh...

What?

Well, a lot of people
who liked the torpedo burger

- like the slim Mickey.
- I don't want...

- Okay.
- a slim Mickey!

- Can you...
- I want a torpedo burger!

Listen to me, we're gonna
make a torpedo burger.

You have a hot dog bun, right?

It's not... it doesn't make...
you know, I'm leaving.

I'm making a...
We're not leaving.

Uhuhuh-uh.
Max, sit down.

Your sister leaves
in three days...

- get off of me!
- Hey, hey, hey!

- Let's just go then.
- You sit down.

You're not helping
matters at all.

Your sister is leaving
in three days.

Chill out, okay?

We're here to celebrate her
before she leaves forever.

- I don't care.
- You understand me?

Please turn around.
This is not your family, okay?

- Guacamole is missing.
- You stop texting.

I'm not.
You aren't even paying...

we're here to celebrate you.

Fill the gap... between purple
and red and white, there's...

- Okay.
- Space it up, space it up.

Okay, between Heather
and Trish and Jackie, you mean?

Yeah. Crew cut kid,
you gotta smile.

- Jack, I'm a funny clown.
- Okay, good.

Okay, good, good, good.
Right here.

Right here.
Get out of the way.

Beautiful.

Okay.
Right here, guys.

- Cute.
- You know what?

Give me the 7200.
Okay.

This is good.
This is golden hour.

Hurry up.
Golden hour.

We only have one hour left.

No, we don't.
That's an expression.

We got a couple of minutes.
Hurry up.

Right.
No, duh.

Duh.

The camera,
I need the camera, too!

Right.
Sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry.

All right, hold on.
Stay right there, guys.

This is good.

All right.
We need to bounce now.

We need bounce, come on.
The round thing?

- Yeah, the round thing.
- Okay, it's coming.

Here you go.
Give me the camera.

Okay, you want me to take that?

- Give me that.
- Okay.

All right.
We need fill, fill, fill.

We need fill.
George, his name is George.

No, we... fill, put it there.

Okay.
Here it comes, you guys.

- What are you...
- I don't know how it...

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God.

- The sun's gone.
- Sorry.

I'm so sorry.

Thank you, everybody.

Good job, everybody.

He prayed a few times is that so terrible?

Hey, you're the one that said
they dragged you to church

your whole childhood and now
you don't even believe in it.

Yeah, I don't
believe in church.

That's different
than believing in God.

Oh, so you believe in God?

Yeah.

It was a big comfort to me
when I was a kid.

And it wasn't
about God or church.

- It was about community.
- Yeah, I mean...

yeah, it's a community of people
with the same belief.

If you don't have that belief,

you're not gonna be
a part of that community.

And I don't want my son
to be a part of some club

that I'm not a member of.

I mean, maybe that's
selfish, but...

- Maybe a little.
- Well, maybe a little.

- Mm-hmm.
- Boom! Boom!

Boom! Boom! Boom!
Oh!

Hi, mom.
Hi, dad.

Here's the lord's soldier
right now.

- His lizard is missing?
- Yeah, his lizard is missing.

I... it happens all the time.

It probably just
got out of its cage

and it's hiding in
a laundry basket or something.

I hate to be
bothering you with this.

You don't think that Victor...

No, no, no.

It's just when they
had playdate together,

Max said that, you know, after
he and Victor were playing,

it was missing.
I know that he didn't take it.

Well, I know how much
those lizards mean to Max.

Like I said,
it happens all the time.

It's just the playdate together,
it's missing. It's silly.

But... Look, I'm embarrassed to
even have called you, so...

No, no.
Kristina, it's fine.

I will ask Victor
if he knows anything

or if he saw it
and I'll let you know.

Okay.
Thanks, Jules.

Hi. Can I help you?

Hi, yeah, I'm looking for Nick.

For Nick?

Yeah, I'm surprising him
with these muffins.

It's our half-year anniversary.

Wow!
That's great.

I'm gonna take you right to him.

- Come with me.
- Great.

- So muffins, huh?
- Yeah.

Wow, lucky guy.

Hey, Nick, look who I found.

- Chelsea, hi.
- Happy six-month anniversary.

- Yay.
- Oh, that's right.

What a nice surprise.

- Mm.
- Wow.

- Hey, Amber.
- Enjoy your muffins.

Would you run up
to the hardware store

and grab a plunger?

Look, I'll go in a minute.
Just...

What's the matter?

Uh-oh.

- Hey.
- What are you doing here?

What do you mean
what am I doing here?

We said 10:00, right?

You're fired.

What?

You're fired.
You're fired.

It wasn't obvious you
were fired yesterday with...

How can I be fired?
It was one day.

I mean, look, okay.

It wasn't perfect.
It was my first day.

I was nervous.
I might have, you know,

exaggerated slightly how much
experience I have, but...

- No, you have no experience.
- No, I don't have none.

So, don't even...
don't even say that.

- Hold on. No, no, no.
- No, you have nothing.

- Don't even... no, no, no.
- No. Stop it.

Nada, okay?
You lied.

- I didn't lie completely...
- Yeah, you blatantly lied...

Uh, no.

And you ruined my best shot.

Oh, no, what, your golden hour?

You got a million shots of that
family that were beautiful.

- Here's what I'm talking about.
- If you do not let that go...

- See.
- What?

You have no respect for light.

I do have respect for light.

It was one shot out of,
like, 300 gorgeous shots.

And I mean, what
did you expect, you know,

with your elaborate
screening process?

Like, you didn't even
know my first name.

Why didn't... why didn't you
fire me yesterday?

I needed somebody
to help me load the van.

Oh.

Just it's... this
is not the job for you,

so you're fired, all right?

Fine.

Can I at least
get my day's pay?

Well, what do you
think you earned?

We explored our spiritual
side back in the '60s.

- Oh, oh, okay.
- Yes.

Great. What did you...
what did you do?

Um, well, I lived
and worked on a commune.

Wow!

I did not know that.

And, um, we were
Buddhists for a while.

We joined the Buddhist temple.

You were a Buddhist?

What?
I can be zen.

And there was that
tantric thing that we did.

Oh, yeah.

Ai yi yi.
Mom, listen.

Here's what I'm
trying to get at.

You know, what did you...
what did you take away

from of all of
this experimentation?

Um, well, I think
we both realized

that we were more
invested in this world

and that if God exists at all,

he's right here in our family.
You know, in this house.

Okay. But, you know, where
do you think we go when we die,

or, you know,
what started life?

How do you answer
those questions?

- I don't... I don't know.
- I don't know.

And even if I did,
how would that help you?

Isn't this something that you
have to discover for yourself?

Hey, come on. I mean,
jeez, we gave you baseball.

Hm.
Thank you for that.

But you know, things happen.

So it's fine if, you know,
you happened to take it

and then forget
to put it back in the cage.

- And it's not a big deal.
- Yeah, not a problem.

- We just need to know.
- Yeah.

It's fine.

I didn't take
his stupid lizard.

Okay, good.

Well, that's all
we needed to know.

Great. Okay.

Victor, I also
just wanted to know

how it's going
for you here, overall.

It's fine.

Good. Well, you know,
if you need anything,

you know that
we're here for you.

- Right?
- Yeah.

All right.

Okay.

Did you know that

thousands of family pets
are reported missing annually,

and metropolitan zoos
have seen a rise

in theft attempts
of exotic animals.

Max, I don't want to talk
about your stolen lizard.

I'm gonna miss you, Max...

A lot, all the time.

I'm gonna miss
how you're really honest

and how you always say exactly
what you think about things

and how you always know exactly
how you feel about things.

It's a really rare quality.

- I'm gonna miss it.
- Okay.

- I got you a present.
- Did you?

Ooh, now he's interested.

Yup!

- It's a weighted blanket.
- Oh, goodness.

I read about it online.

Um, it's 25 pounds,
and apparently,

a lot of people with Asperger's
find them comforting.

- So... You wanna try it?
- Sure.

How's it feel?

Good.

Great.

All right,
I will, um, leave you alone.

I love you, Max.

Max, I said I love you.

Yeah. Thanks.

Hmm.

Hey.

Hey.

You waiting up
for Haddie again?

No.

No?
What are you doing?

- I'm reading.
- Mm-hmm.

I'm pathetic.

I'm pathetic.

I don't know why
I'm waiting up for her.

She's gonna come home,
she's gonna say two words to me,

and she's gonna go upstairs.

Why don't you
just come to bed, huh?

I just had the best week
planned for us, you know.

We were gonna do
so many fun things.

We were gonna go shopping
together, and we'd hang out,

and we'd gossip, and...

Just didn't turn out
like that at all.

It was like, she couldn't
fit me into her schedule,

so it's like...
She went to see her friends.

- You got her a good coat.
- I like the coat.

- A nice, warm coat.
- It is a nice warm coat.

It's gonna be cold.

And the whole thing at
the burger and pie instant...

that whole thing was a fiasco.

- Yup.
- Who takes that off the menu?

I don't know.
It's a good burger.

- It's a great burger.
- I know.

I don't understand it.

She's never gonna
live here again.

Yeah.

Well, she'll come over
for holidays.

You know what I mean.

Yeah.

You wanna get drunk?

Kill it.

Down the hatch.
Dump it down.

Stop it.

Get off... G-guacamole!

Hey, hey, hey.

Today is the big day, huh?

Amy comes back from camp.

Yeah, she actually pushed back
the return three days, so...

- She did?
- Yeah.

- Again?
- Yeah.

Huh.
Did she say why?

No, it's kind of hard
to reach her out there.

I mean, I don't know.

She seems kind of, like,
distant or something.

Well, grandson,
I'll tell you something.

Here's what I think.

I've seen the way
that girl looks at you.

She loves to be around you.

You've got no worries there,
as far as I can see.

As you soon you start,
you know, bulking up,

putting on some weight,
it'll be... hoo-hoo.

Zeek's famous protein drink
is sure to bulk you up.

Drink up.

I tell you what,
I need 30 more reps

from you on
the old bicep curls, huh.

Atta boy.

♪ I'm tired of waking up
and feeling so lonely ♪

♪ I guess I should've listened
when you sat down and told me ♪

♪ so give me one more day

♪ give me one more night

♪ today's our day

♪ let's forget about
everyone else ♪

♪ and everything else

Can you believe
what a prick this guy is?

Yeah, he's the worst.

Comes in here
and seduces Amber,

it turns out he's got
a serious girlfriend.

Acts like nothing happened.
Real Casanova, right?

- Right.
- Who pulls crap like that?

- Musicians.
- Yeah, musicians.

Even ones you wouldn't think,
like Kenny G and stuff.

You know what? I don't want
him recording here any more.

- What?
- I want him out.

You're serious?

- Yeah, I'm serious.
- You want them out?

I knew I shouldn't have
told you about Amber.

She's 20 years old.
She's an adult.

You can't get involved
like this.

So what? So, what,
are we gonna just sit back

and let somebody
take advantage of her

without doing
anything about it?

I don't think so.
Yes.

You know what?
That's it.

Hey, guys, excuse me.

- I want you...
- He's a paying customer.

To pack it up and get out.

- What?
- We're done here.

We are done.
You're overreacting.

You know what...
You're done.

You're not touching
that thing any more.

- Listen, what are you...
- Hey.

- Adam!
- Guys, I'm serious.

- Unplug it and get out.
- Why, man?

- We don't want you here.
- Oh, my God.

Okay? Everybody, out.
You, get out.

- Adam!
- You know what you did.

You don't have
to listen to him.

- Hey!
- How is she gonna learn

a lesson if you throw him out?

You don't have
a daughter, all right?

Hey, Mark.

- Hi.
- You know, Sarah's not here.

I know.

I actually... I was wondering
if I could talk to you.

Oh. What's up?

Well, Camille...

Sarah and I are engaged,
as you know,

and I think I...
Should be

in the family portrait
with you guys.

Oh, Mark, you're so sweet.

And we all think
you're wonderful, we really do.

It's just that, you know,

sometimes life doesn't work out
the way we expect it to.

'Cause I-I know that I don't
have a ring yet, or...

It's not about the ring.

Well, and I know
that we haven't set a...

- Um, hey, Zeek.
- Hey, Mark.

I know we haven't
set a wedding date yet,

but Drew is graduating
this year and we didn't want

to rush into it
until... before that.

- Well, right.
- But it is going to happen.

- Hello.
- Hi.

You know,
I'm not going anywhere.

I'm in love with her.

And I respect family policy,

but I-I am a part
of your family.

And I'm proud to be
a part of your family.

I guess I want you
to be proud of it, too.

Max, what are you doing?
Max, are you serious?

Max! Max!

Do not touch my stuff.

- I'm looking for Guacamole.
- Stop!

I have to pack this up again.

- This is my stuff.
- Hey, hey.

What's going on in here?

I'm trying to find
all the possible...

Max is looking
for his stupid lizard.

Look at my room.
I'll make more later.

He lost his lizard, okay.
This can be repacked.

- Just l'll talk to him.
- Oh, great.

I'm sure that
that's really gonna help.

- Don't, it's fine.
- Hey, Haddie,

just take a breath.
I'm packing up.

- No, it's fine.
- Lose the attitude, okay?

- You're overreacting.
- Don't... stop.

Stop. Stop!
I'll clean it when I get back.

Well, where exactly
do you think you're going?

Look, your grandparents
are throwing

a going away party for you,
okay? Get back here.

This entire party
is for you, okay?

You've known about it all week.

You don't just waltz in
whenever you want.

This party is not for me.

None of this week
has been for me.

I need to get out
and have a second of space.

Take a breath.

We'll repack all
this together, okay?

Fine, don't come at all.
Don't show up at all.

- Come on, honey. Honey.
- Great, I won't!

And by the way,
I had my bonding time with Max

and it went really great,
and we're closer than ever,

and he's totally normal.

Hi.

I'm saying hi, you know,
so it's not too awkward.

Um, might be
a little late for that.

We'll just get a little bit
more, just right on top here.

My hair is fine.

Well...

- Boys.
- Yeah.

Here, I'll take this
out for you.

She better show up.

She better show after
we made all these cupcakes.

This party is for her,
and everybody came...

Hey, how did you
handle the God topic with

Amber and Drew?

Which God topic?

Well, we were raised
in a spiritual vacuum,

so what did you pass on
to your kids?

Oh, Crosby, come on, let it go.

Hey.
Hey.

How did you get in?

I knocked and I rang,
but I didn't think...

What is this?

Are you kidding me?
What?

I had to wait eight years
to get in the family picture.

Yeah, I had to marry
his ass to get in.

She made us wait until
our three-year anniversary.

- He found a loophole!
- This is unacceptable.

You guys exaggerate so bad.

- Who's that guy?
- Aunt Sarah's fiance.

Huh.

What is he, 6?

He is 29.

Yeah, that's
a little dark, Mark.

You're a little weird.

- Yep.
- I like you.

I don't know if I like you yet.

Maybe some black over here.

Hey, can I talk to you
for a second, outside?

- Uh, yeah.
- Okay.

- A rich, full blue.
- But his is...

A Navy blue.

I'm sorry.
I just...

- What's up? Go ahead.
- Uh...

Um, did you tell the band

that they couldn't record
at the studio any more?

Yeah.

Look, I didn't think
that Nick behaved

in an honorable fashion, okay?

Okay, sergeant.
I appreciate it.

But we are at
a recording studio.

- Yup!
- It's rock and roll.

It's...
I understand it...

listen, Amber,
it was my decision,

and I'm not gonna stand by

and let somebody
take advantage of you.

- Okay?
- Okay.

Uh, that's noble, but I wasn't
being taken advantage of.

I was a willing participant,
very willing, okay.

And I'm sorry, but you can't
jump into something like that.

That guy was a jerk!

Regardless if whether
he was a jerk, I'm fine.

And you threw away good business
for no reason...

- It's not about business.
- Because I'm totally fine.

Well, it should be.

It's gotta be,
because I'm your employee now.

And you have to start treating
me as an adult, because I am.

I'm sorry.
I really am.

I can see how that would...

I just...
I feel protective.

I don't want
to see you get hurt.

You understand that?

Uncle Adam...
I understand.

I really do.

But can you please do your best

to treat me
like a normal employee?

I will try.
I am sorry if I embarrassed you.

It's okay.

Well, I'm glad
you called this meeting.

Me too.
Thank you, sir.

- I will see you at work.
- I will see you there.

All right, show up on time.

Hey.

What are you doing?

It's too loud in there.

- Yeah, they're crazy.
- A little bit.

They're kind of
irreplaceable, though.

Ooh, baby.

It's my girl.

Hey, Haddie.

I got her, guys.
I got her.

- Get in here.
- She's really late.

That's my girl.

Okay, everybody, let's get
together and get this photo now.

- Honey.
- Hm?

That's our baby.

It's a good time
right now, guys, okay?

- Okay.
- Perfect.

- Bigger smile, though.
- Let's go right now.

- We are ready.
- Okay, Maxy is good in here?

He's good in here
behind the grandparents?

- Okay.
- Let's go right here, guys.

Guys, right here.
Why don't we do this?

All right,
pretend you like each other.

Oh, that's beautiful.

- Yeah, you're quite a crew.
- Yeah.

I can't believe
you got everybody.

See, that kid will
never look at the damn lens.

- Yeah.
- Hm.

You did pretty good.
That's Max.

He has Asperger's.

- Oh, yeah?
- Mm-hmm.

I knew something was up.

Good kid.

Yeah.

Well, thank you.

God, these are great.
I could look at them all day,

but I should get
these to the family.

If anyone can possibly
agree on one, we'll...

- Yeah, let me know.
- We'll let you know.

Yeah. Thank you.
They're really, really, great.

And I appreciate it.

- All right.
- So, thank you.

And you can tell your mom,

you know, if it doesn't work out
between you and junior,

I could just Photoshop him out
for a small minimal cost.

- Thank you, thank you so much.
- Yeah, yeah.

I'm sure she'll be
very happy to hear that.

- That's all right.
- Mm-hmm.

He's a good guy, right?
Where did you meet him?

Is he a "make-a-wish" kid?
That's good.

That's funny.
Was he trick or treating

or something?
Hey, enjoy yourself.

There's a lot
of material there.

Good-bye.

Anyway, look,
I was gonna call you.

- Oh, yeah.
- Yeah.

Um...

Turns out the people
at the shoot,

they liked you.

They, um, made
a big stink about it.

So it turns out
you're good at the schmooze.

And I hate talking to clients.
Truly, I hate it.

I get a little sick
in my stomach sometimes.

Yeah, so that's why
I was gonna call you.

You're not as awful
as I originally thought.

I'm sorry,
is this... Some sort of

twisted job offer?

You've gotta learn
about photography, too.

Yukking it up with clients,

you smile...
"hey, give me a hug"...

that's not gonna cut it,
I can assure you that.

II will learn.

Well, I'll call you, then.

Let's see how it goes.

All right, go.
Get the hell out of here.

- Thank you S... thank you.
- All right.

Hey.

- You're back.
- Yeah.

- I can't believe it.
- I'm back.

Oh, my God.
I missed you so much.

I missed you, too.

I can't believe you're back.

Do you wanna
go inside or something?

Sure.

Mm!

Shooting star.
Did you see it?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Oh, man.
Did you make a wish?

Yeah.

All right, well,
don't tell me what it was.

Hey, when I saw you
praying the other day,

- what were you praying about?
- Different things.

Different things.
What kind of things?

Like, I tell him that...
To watch over my family,

for us all to be happy
and stay together as a family.

Ooh, that's nice.
That's nice.

And a motorcycle and an Xbox.

A motor...
you can't drive a motorcycle.

- When I get older.
- Oh, when you get older.

All right,
those are good things.

Well, I know grandma told you
what she believes in,

about God and religion.

And I thought maybe I should
tell you what I believe.

- Do you wanna hear it?
- Okay, daddy.

Well, I believe in you.

You're my number one guy.
Okay?

And I believe in your mom

and all of our family,

my mom and dad
and my brothers and sisters.

And um, sometimes...

Like on a night like tonight,

when I'm sitting
under the stars with my son,

eating delicious cookies,
I think...

I'm pretty blessed.

I'm blessed by something,
you know.

Me too, daddy.

Mm, what's that thing
that's moving?

- Is that another shooting star?
- That's an airplane.

- Ohh.
- Mm-hmm.

I just need him to feel
like we believe in him.

It's been five months, Julia.

You can't keep walking
on eggshells around this boy.

Everything I've read
says that, right now,

our job is
to make him feel loved,

trusted, and like
he's part of this family.

Yeah, and the way you do that
is treat him like family.

Not asking him
about this is like...

is treating him like a guest.

God.

Joel...

What?

I feel like I'm waiting
to fall in love with our son.

Okay.

Um, you have everything?
Your boarding pass, your ID.

Yeah. Yep!

- You got enough cash?
- Yeah.

- You know what? Just in case.
- Yeah, give her an extra $20.

In case you need
cab fare or something...

And I packed your snacks
in your bag.

- Just take it all.
- Thanks.

- Just take all of it.
- Okay.

All right.

Okay.

I love you.
Just call us when you land.

Got it.
Bye.

I'm gonna miss you.

Okay.
All right.

- Okay.
- See you all.

Hi.

♪ da da da da ya

♪ da

♪ ta da da da