Packed to the Rafters (2008–2013): Season 5, Episode 3 - The Power of Words - full transcript

Okay. So, imagine...

-Ah, this again.
-Come on.

No, you first.

Words are powerful.

They can transport us
anywhere.

Imagine we didn't have
to go back to work today.

Mm.

Imagine we could just
get on that yacht

and take off anywhere.

Tahiti?

Imagine how perfect
that would be.



String them together
the right way

and it takes is a few words
to change your life forever.

-Ben, I--
- Ben!

The men's toilets
are blocked again.

Or not as the case may be.

It's the last thing we need
for Valentine's Day tomorrow.

Imagine there wasn't
a plumbing issue

-to take care of.
-Imagine the lunch

special today wasn't curry.

-How did you go?
-Problem solved.

Let's never speak of
this moment again.

Hey, Granddad.

You're run off your feet today
by the look of it.

Well, if people
are coming tomorrow



expecting romance
then we've got to deliver.

Oh, Ted, I won these
movie tickets in a raffle.

I thought you might like
to take Cooper.

Oh.

Now are you sure you don't
want them yourself?

Oh no, it's all spaceships
and carnage.

Not my cup of tea.

Not that I don't enjoy
the pictures, I do.

In fact, there's a couple
of things on right now

-that I'd love to see.
-Mm.

Only it's always so much nicer
to go with someone.

Isn't it.

You're a bit
of a cinema fan, Ted?

-Oh, absolutely.
Granddad's so clueless.

It's kind of cute.

Your mom's making
the moves.

So, do you get out
to Friend Finders

-much these day, Ted?
-Well, I haven't been to one

of their functions
for a while, I must say.

No more card nights
with Helen and the girls?

No, I've let things
slip there a bit, I suppose.

I must give them a bell.

Well, I'd better chase up

that order of champagne
for tomorrow.

Can't have the most
romantic night

of the year without bubbly.

That would be a disaster.

Donna, I don't want
to sound too out there

but if you want to go
on a date with Granddad,

why don't you just ask him?

I don't even know
what you're talking about.

Neither does Granddad.
That's my point.

You're going to have to
spell it out.

Not that you should be
paying attention anyway,

but what you just saw

was a pleasant chat
between two friends.

-What?
-She's right.

It's none of your business.

But if you are going to
continue with this nonsense,

then I take it that Ted
is definitely single?

So it looks like Donna's
back on the prowl.

Oh?

Although Granddad's
got no idea.

Oh, don't start that again.

All that silliness is
over and done with.

Oh, I don't know about that.

Why? What's happened?

Well she was practically
throwing herself

-at him at lunchtime.
-Oh.

And how did Dad
respond to that?

Honestly, I think Donna
could've done a pole dance

in front of him and he still
wouldn't have noticed.

There you go.
He's obviously not interested.

You really don't like
the idea of those two

-being together, do you?
-No, darling,

no one likes the thought
of their parent

getting together
with a friend.

I mean, imagine if something
happened to your Dad

and I hooked up
with Carbo.

I don't know
what's more disturbing,

that image or the fact

that you said "hooked up"
in a sentence.

It's the image.
It's definitely the image.

Dave Rafter.

Yeah. Yeah, yeah.
She's right here.

Yup, hang on.

-Adam.
-Oh.

-Hi, Adam.
-Okay, question.

Julie, have you ever thought
much about the radio?

Uh, in what sense?

-Being on it.

There's my answer.

Yeah, well,
why are you asking?

Because the local
radio station

has a weekly segment
on parenting

and they want you
to come in

and talk about
your recent column.

And they thought
it was hilarious

the way you write
about being a--

Being a geriatric mom?

Hmm, hilarious. No.

I'd be too nervous.

No, I'd freeze up.

I wouldn't know
what to say.

Well, it's not like
you don't have

-the perfect face for it.
-Ha-ha.

Was that meant
to make me change my mind?

- Did it?
-No.

No, I'm not cut out
for the airwaves.

Well, I'm having palpitations
just thinking about it.

Okay, seriously what
did you just say no to?

Someone asked you
to be on the radio?

It's just a local station.

Nothing to get excited about.

Uh, and you still said no?

Darling, I have no interest
in being interviewed

or making a complete fool
of myself for that matter.

Well, the two wouldn't
necessarily go together.

Ah, yes, but we don't know
that for sure, do we?

Anyway, it's
Valentine's Day tomorrow.

Got anything special
planned for Emma?

A card? Serenade?

Way to change the subject.

Way to avoid the question.

Seriously, is there
any other day of the year

where words have
more significance?

And I will take those three.

-Thanks very much.
-Three Valentine's Day cards?

Oh, sharing the love.
Nothing wrong with that.

Just as long as they don't
all find out

about each other.

Oh, well, one's for my nanna
to give to my pop.

And one's for my pop
to give right back to her.

And this?

Well, a man can dream,
can't he?

Shoot me.
Just shoot me now.

Shut up, Ben.

That was so beautiful,
wasn't it?

Best movie I've seen
in ages, babe.

Okay, I'm making
the big call.

I'm going to do it.

That was even better
than The Notebook.

-Oh...
-Oh...

Don't go there, Benno.
Not on this topic.

What? It was so gorgeous,
wasn't it?

She finally told him
that she loved him.

You could kind of see it
coming though.

-Thank you.
-No, it was perfect.

It's exactly
how it should be.

They're three little words
that can't be thrown away.

You told Carbo you loved him
on your first date.

-I meant it too.

I wouldn't have said it
otherwise.

You've just got to pick
that perfect time,

-don't you think?
-Absolutely.

Yeah, like Mel didn't
tell Ben she loved him

'til after they were engaged.

It's a moment
that can't be forced.

That was just the right time
for her to say it.

You wouldn't have had it
any other way I'm sure?

I don't know.
If she'd told me sooner

I wouldn't have hated it.

Words that can't be
thrown away, Ben.

It's my whole point.

I'm going to head home.

I need to do some washing
and other stuff.

Oh.

I'm being ditched
for the laundry.

Well, it's mom's fault.

If she didn't insist
on this whole

wearing clothes
to work thing.

I'm more than happy to talk
to her about that one.

I'll see you tomorrow.

Hey, um,

it wasn't too weird before,
was it?

You realize if you asked
that question in this house,

you need to be more specific.

It's just when everybody
starts bringing up Mel...

Oh, Ben, we've been
through this.

Yeah, well, I know, but...

you just went
a little bit quiet.

Blame it on the movie.

I think it killed off
several thousand brain cells.

So everything's okay?

-Of course it is.
-Good.

Words also have the power
to defuse a situation.

And a kiss
doesn't hurt either.

Oh, Emma.
You're home early.

I thought you were staying
at Ben's tonight.

-What are you doing?
-Nothing.

You look like some school kid

who's scared I'm going to
copy their answers.

No, just catching up
on some correspondence.

So what happened?

You didn't have a fight,
did you?

No. I just had stuff to do.

The thing is, Ben and I
watched this movie tonight

and it was all "I love you,
I love you, I love you."

And it was weird
because so many times

I've nearly said that
to him,

but I just don't
let myself go there.

So you do?

What?

Love him.

Yes.

Oh, Emma.

Do you really think
he's going to run a mile?

He might.
And the thing is

once the words
are out there, that's it.

You can't take them back.

Well sooner or later
someone's got to

-put themselves out there.
-Yeah.

I don't even know
how to approach tomorrow.

You know, I don't even know

if we're going to
acknowledge the day or not.

It's probably good
that we're working.

-That's right.
- Yeah.

You may not even have time
to think about it,

there are that many bookings.

Mom, you've done
an amazing job.

If anyone's the queen
of romance, it's you.

Well, I'll remind myself
of that when I come home

tomorrow night and curl up
with a good book.

I'm going to bed.

-Goodnight.
-Goodnight.

♪ Ooh la la ♪

♪ Ooh la la ♪

♪ My mind draws lines
Around the pictures ♪

♪ The dreams that stream
From my head ♪

♪ They seem like
A strange sort of mixture ♪

♪ Of what I've seen
And what I've heard said ♪

♪ Ooh la la ♪

♪ Ooh la la ♪

♪ Ooh la la ♪

Oi. This came in
the mail for you.

Where's mine?

Or were there too many
to carry all at once?

Yeah, you keep
telling yourself that.

So, who's it from?

There's no name on it.

How come you're the one
with the stalker

but I'm the one
who gets the card?

She's not a stalker.

-Oh, she is.
-Oh, she is.

What, she's just rung
a few times.

Mmm, 11.

Well, that's nothing.

Twelve is the cut off.

I bet it's from that guy
from the Thai restaurant.

-He likes you.
-No.

Yeah, I told you
not to scoff down

all his free money bags.

Sooner or later
you're going to

have to pay the piper.

Well, how do we
even know he's gay?

-Well, I think we do now.

What about that
old bird, Mrs. Montague?

No, how is she going
to know where I live?

Well, maybe she got Meals
On Wheels to shadow you.

All right,
I'm going to work.

Ah, wait. Wasn't there
one there for you?

No. The story of my life.

I bet you
it's from my mom.

Oh, mate, if someone
writes a message like that

and you think
it's from your mom,

we have got
some serious problems.

How do you know
what's written in it?

Oh, you didn't...

You smart arse.

-What are you...

Oh. That just hurts
my feelings.

Well, how's Cobe's form?

He didn't even admit
to getting one.

What, did you send one
to him too?

Yeah. Well I didn't
want him to miss out.

Not on a universal day
of love.

♪ Ooh la la ♪

♪ Ooh la la ♪

If saying words out loud

isn't a big deal enough...

writing them down
is a million times worse.

Isn't this the most
romantic thing

you have ever seen
in your life?

You know what we're
looking at is compost?

That's all flowers turn into.

Carbo, I love it!

I absolutely love it.

In this history of romance,

this is the absolute best.

Retta,
I'm not sure I even know

what you're talking about.

Oh, really?

So then who created
the most perfect

Valentine's Day
surprise ever?

I don't know. Who would do
something like that?

Only the most fantastically
amazing man I know.

He sounds perfect.

And if on the off chance

you happen to run into
someone like that

can you tell him
how much I love him?

Look he's got
competition, baby,

-because I love you.
-No, I love you.

I love you more.

No, I love you more.

And just wait
'til you see the surprise

I've got waiting for you
at home.

Me too.

Okay, love you.

Love you. Bye.

Isn't he the best?

Okay, spill.
What's the surprise?

- Hmm?
-For Carbo.

I'm baking him a cake
in the shape of a heart.

Or you could buy one.

But then it would be missing

the number one ingredient,
Ben.

Charcoal?

Love.

-Or you could buy one.
-And what about you?

What've you got
planned for Emma?

Actions speak louder
than words, so they say.

Except on Valentine's Day

when the pressure's
on to serve up both.

Ooh, you know.

Ooh, you're so sneaky.

I know.

Sneaky.

Or a big fat coward.

Oh darling, thank you

and it's not even out
of the front garden.

No, let's just say Carbo

went a little bit overboard
this morning.

You're giving me
Retta's flowers?

She won't miss it,
trust me.

Are you here for breakfast?

No. Not hungry.

Whoa, now I'm worried.

Am I going to give Emma
a Valentine's Day card or not?

Well, why wouldn't you?

Well, what am I going to
write in it?

Ah, "Happy Valentine's Day,
love Ben"?

See there's
my problem right there.

Yes, well, I admit
it's not the most poetic

offering in the world
but it does the job.

"Love Ben". Love.

I haven't actually said that
to Emma in person yet.

Isn't that a bit weird
to write it in a card?

Well, it depends
on how you feel.

I mean writing "love Ben"

isn't the same
as saying I love you.

So it's a lie
in other words?

Well, no...

Mom, these things
can't be taken back.

Ah. This is all about
Talia what's-her-name

from the fifth grade,
isn't it?

Who?

You sent her the card,
you panicked,

you raced to the post office
to try and get it back...

But it was too late.

Yes, all because
you wrote "love Ben"

and you were embarrassed.

Which proves my point.

Those two words can get you
into a lot of trouble

if you just throw them
around willy nilly.

And what did Talia do
when she got the card?

-She said thanks.
-Yup.

She didn't expect you
to marry her or anything?

No, mom, we were 11.

Darling it's just a card.

On a day like today it's just
good sentimental fun.

It's nothing
to get upset about.

I mean, what girl
ever said no to that?

Obviously not the one
who sent this to Granddad,

if it's what I think it is.

Yes, well, it was shoved
under the front door

this morning
so I can only assume so.

Oh, I bet it's from Donna!

All just good
sentimental fun.

Nothing to get upset about.

You know every time I see you

with your head
in a book like that

it freaks me out dude.

Which is why
I keep doing it.

Really, Cobes? Really?

-That's the only reason?
-Mm.

There's nothing else
making study

seem a little bit
more attractive?

Morning all.

-Morning.
-Frankie.

Morning.

I was just saying to Cobes
what an awesome student

he's turned into
thanks to your coaching.

That's all
Coby's hard work.

I can't take credit.

Very funny.

Woo!

Well, don't keep us
in suspense.

-Who's it from?
-What?

Is that what
I'm supposed to do now?

Open it up and read
what you jokers

have written
on the inside?

Oh no, don't look at me,

I didn't leave it there.

Me neither.

When I was thirteen
there was a card

left on my desk at school
and I was certain

that I knew who it was from.

I was wrong.
Very wrong.

It scarred me for life,
so now I just don't

rate the whole idea
of Valentine's Day.

- Well, just so you know,

someone out there's
going to be heartbroken.

Mm, yes, well,
Mr. Ryan Gosling

will just have to
try a little bit harder.

Cobes, you were here
first this morning.

Did you see who put that
card on Frankie's desk?

It wasn't me if that's
what you were thinking.

Someone must've left it
there last night.

Mate.
I was just having a joke.

Yeah, I know that.

So, it's not from you?

No! I told you that!

All right.

This whole thing
about Frankie is just crap.

I... Yeah, okay.

Oh sorry, I'll lay off,
you know.

But did you
get a Valentine's card

in the mail this morning?

Are you going deaf
or something?

No, I'm just saying
that if you did

that it's probably from Matt

'cause he sent one to me too.
It's just for a laugh.

Okay, yeah, well,
the joke's on you

because I didn't get one.

All right.

Ah.

Oh. Hey.

Someone put this
under the front door

for you this morning.

-Mm-hmm.
-Hand delivered.

Aren't you going to open it?

Well, can't I have
my breakfast first?

What, that's more
important than finding out

who that's from?

Well, apparently not to you.

Oh, yes!

Don't keep me in suspense.

There's no signature.

Yeah, but do you recognize
the handwriting?

Uh-uh.

Probably Helen from
Friend Finders, isn't it.

It could be any one
of a hundred women.

Who knows how many
admirers I've got

-lurking about out there.
-Yeah, all right.

Now you're
just rubbing it in.

I've barely got
a goodbye kiss

out of my husband
this morning.

I mean, I know we've been
married for years

and these things
shouldn't matter

but I remember the days

when he used to
buy me a card

-and he'd hide it somewhere...
- Jules.

-...for me to find.
-Jules.

I mean, Dave's got
a lot on his plate.

- Mm.
-I'm not surprised

it's slipped his mind
this year.

Jules!

Ooh!

Oh.

Oh.

♪ Ooh la la ♪

-Hey.
-Hi.

This is for you.

Open it.

I didn't want to
get you anything

but then I thought the whole
Valentine's Day thing

can make things a bit weird.

Happy un-valentine's day
to you too.

It's probably a bit melted

but it's the thought
that counts.

I'll split it
with you at lunch?

Make sure you do.

Thanks.

You thought I'd forgotten,
hadn't you?

-No, of course not.
-Maybe.

Just a little.

How long did it take you
to find yours?

He was tearing the place apart
for a good half hour.

-Five minutes tops.

Well, just so you know

the rest of your present's
coming later.

Oh, any time you want
to change the subject,

-we won't mind.

Hello.
Julie Rafter.

Hey Julie, it's Adam.

You got time for a quick
bite at lunch today?

I want to run a few ideas
for the column by you.

Oh, uh, I don't think

I'm going to have time
for lunch today.

It's Adam. Wants to know
if I can get together

and talk about
what I'm writing next week.

I reckon we can spare you
for an hour.

Oh. Ah, I've got clearance
from the boss.

A secret rendezvous
with another man

on Valentine's Day.

Dad knows about this,
does he?

It's a business meeting.

They always are.

Yeah you're not getting
a new step-daddy

anytime soon,
it's fine.

Hey, has Donna said anything
about leaving the card?

It's not really
the sort of thing

she's going to talk
about with me is it.

No.

Oh! Got the place looking
lovely for today.

It's hard to know
whether not to go all out

but some people think
it's really cheesy

but others expect you
to go to an effort.

And what camp
would you fall into?

Well there's nothing wrong

with bringing
a little romance

into people's lives,
is there?

Yeah, well, it's just
that when it's coming

under the front door
first thing in the morning

it starts to feel
a little bit odd, that's all.

I'm sorry?

Look, I know it's none
of my business,

although, you know what,
it actually kind of is

because Dad's my father
and if you're still

-showing an interest...
-Oh, don't start this again.

Hey can't you put yourself
in my position for a minute?

No, because
I have absolutely no idea

what interest I'm showing.

Well, the card you shoved
under the front door

this morning for Dad!

Oh.

Oh, it wasn't from you.

-Oh.
-No, it wasn't.

Oh, I'm sorry.
I'm so sorry.

Just 'cause I thought
you liking Dad and all

that silliness was over,
and it is obviously.

So, it's just
a misunderstanding.

I didn't send the card
but only because

I wasn't brave enough to

and I'd just like
to point out

that silliness is your term
and not mine.

Not that I want
to shake anyone

out of their
pitiful complacency

but if they could see fit

to make a delivery
sometime this week,

it'd be most helpful!

Mom, it is the day
of sharing the love,

-or so I've heard.
-Oh yes, it certainly is,

that's why Ted Taylor's
been bombarded

with cards and chocolates
and flowers

from women who weren't
too scared

to put an envelope
in his letterbox.

I hope that's not code
for something else.

Somebody sent Ted
chocolates?

All right,
I'm exaggerating slightly

but somebody
sent him a card.

-I thought that was from you.
-No, Ben.

The card was from someone
who had the guts

-to go through with it.
- Look, Donna,

the thing you've got to
remember about Granddad is,

he's not exactly quick
on the uptake.

You've still got time to beat
this hussy at her own game.

How do I do that?

Ask him out to dinner tonight.

-I couldn't possibly.
-Why not? He likes to eat.

He likes to have company
while he's doing it.

-It's Valentine's Day.
-Yes, it is.

It's the perfect day
to tell someone how you feel.

- Oh.
- Hey?

Don't you think?

Yup, I can sure harness
the power of words

when it suits me,

but not when it comes
to my own love life.

-Julie. I'm sorry I'm late.
-Oh, no, it's fine.

And a very happy
Valentine's Day to you both.

In honor of the special
occasion,

would sir like to treat
this special lady

to a bottle
of our finest fizz?

This is my son, Ben,
who frequently tries

to convince himself
he's funny.

-Adam.
-My strike rate's pretty high.

Yes, well,
this is Adam,

my boss from the newspaper.

We're here to talk
about work.

-That old chestnut.
-Mate,

I almost had her convinced.
You don't blow my cover.

Don't give him
any encouragement.

I'd like another
mineral water thanks.

-I'd like one too.
-Okay.

-Nice to meet you.

I thought Julie must've been
meeting Dave for lunch.

Oh, no, that's her boss
from the paper.

A very handsome
looking chap, isn't he?

Oh, Donna, leave some
for the rest of the girls.

Just making an observation.

Have you made the call yet?

So did you give
anymore thought

-to this radio interview?
-Oh.

This isn't what we're here
to talk about.

Come on, it's community radio.
It's a one off.

Look, I just don't think
I can do it.

Come on, look, I know
it sounds intimidating

but really it's
no different

to what we're doing here
right now.

Just two friends,
sitting down, having a chat.

You're not going to give up
on this, are you?

No.
Really, look, honestly,

it's totally up to you.
I'm not going to sit here

-and try and strong arm you.
-Good.

I mean, you're probably
right anyway.

If this is really
how you feel,

it would be
a complete disaster.

You know what I hate the most
about reverse psychology?

-That it works?
-Oh.

How did I let myself
get talked into this?

I'm not going to make
a fool of myself, am I?

Oh, people do that
on the radio all the time,

usually for a very big
pay check.

But, no, you're not.

Ah, I mean, how could you?

♪ Ooh la la ♪

♪ Ooh la la ♪

♪ My mind draws lines
Around the pictures ♪

♪ The dreams that stream
From my head ♪

♪ They seem like a strange
Sort of mixture ♪

♪ Of what I've seen
And what I've heard said ♪

♪ Ooh la la ♪

♪ Ooh la la ♪

♪ Ooh la la ♪

Hello.

Oh, hello, Ted.
It's Donna.

I haven't caught you
in a bad time, have I?

Oh, Donna, no, no.
Oh, look, hang on a tick.

My lady friend here
is not eating.

Oh, I'm so sorry.

I'm interrupting
a special lunch.

Well, look,
I don't think that's quite

-the word for it myself.
- I'm sorry, Ted.

-I'll let you go.
-No, no, don't, hang on.

I've just got
to wipe the face.

Ruby, let me wipe it.

-Go on have a drink then.
- Ruby.

You're having lunch with Ruby.

Well, there aren't
very many other people

whose dribble I have
to clean up for them.

I'm sorry.
I just thought,

well, it is
Valentine's Day.

Did you think
I was on a hot date?

Well, you don't have
to say it as if it's such

-a joke.
-Well, you're about

the only person
who thinks it isn't.

Well, as it so happens,
I'm ringing to see

if you might like
to have dinner tonight?

With me.

But when I say "dinner",

I don't mean a friendly
catch up, I mean...

Well, I mean, dinner.

But if you think
it's not something

that you would be
interested in--

Having dinner
with you tonight, Donna,

would be my pleasure.

Oh, right.

Well...
What do we do?

We could come here
to the Boat Club.

Although, Emma and Ben
would be here.

It might be a bit like
being in a fishbowl.

Or I could make us
something at my place.

Well, I don't want you
to go to any trouble.

Oh, well, it won't be.

But if you prefer
the Boat Club, I mean...

-Well, whatever you think.
-Well, I think

the first option might
be best, don't you?

Ah. Well, it sounds
good to me.

Um, shall we say
seven o'clock?

Perfect.
See you then.

I take it he said yes?

How are you going
with the assignment?

Yup, it's all coming together.

Hey, um, thanks for the card
by the way.

I didn't mean to make such
a big deal out of it.

It's just I thought
you were taking the piss.

Yeah, well, I already told you
the card's not from me.

Oh, yeah, right.

Well, whatever.

Tickets on myself or what.

Yeah, just a bit.

Okay.
I'll see you tomorrow.

Hey, you're not
taking off already are you?

-What are you doing tonight?
-Nothing. I don't do

-Valentine's Day.
-Oh, shame

because I've said it before
and I'll say it again,

if you're a flower,
I'd pick you.

-Every time.
-You.

Who else did you
think it was going to be from?

Oh, I don't know,
someone cute?

Oh, well, your prayers
have been answered.

Here I am and I'm playing
at The Legacy tonight

-if you want to come along?
-That's your idea of romance?

Well, I'll dedicate
a song to you.

More than one if you play
your cards right.

When you put it like that,
how could I say no?

Hey, mate, what are you
up to tonight?

-Want to tag along?
-Yeah. Come on, Cobes.

-You can't study all night.
-Yeah, no,

I think I'll give
that one a big fat miss.

Thanks all the same.

Help, help, help, help,
help, help, help!

Quick! Quick! Quick!

Let me guess, Carbo's cake?

My romantic surprise.

I'm pretty sure
that cake might be done.

Do you think with some icing--

No. No.

What am I going to do?

Carbo went to so much effort,

not that you can even
smell the roses now

'cause I almost burnt
the house down.

Retta, do you think there's
a chance you might be

over thinking it all
just a bit?

No, after all the trouble
Carbo went to,

I have to do something
on the same level.

Yeah, but the thing
with you and Carbo is

every day's
like Valentine's Day.

No wonder you're having
trouble coming up

-with something.
-I just wanted today

-to be extra special.
-And it will be.

No matter what you do,
big or small,

Carbo will love it.

If it's any help at all,
I'm going to be working

so you'll have the place
to yourselves.

Hmm. That does open up
the possibilities...

I don't want to hear anymore.
That's okay. Thanks.

Okay, Mom,
I'd better get back there.

How many courses are you
actually making?

Well, I was thinking three.

But I don't even know
what he likes to eat.

He could be a vegetarian.

- Mom...
-I didn't even think to ask.

Well, how many times have you
served him lamb shanks

-at the club?
-You're right.

Of course you're right.

Just don't go too overboard.

You know, Valentine's Day
comes with so much expectation

and I don't want you
getting hurt.

All we're doing is having
a nice meal together.

But you want it to be
more than that.

Well, so what if I do?

What's wrong with not wanting
to be on my own anymore?

-Nothing.
-It's all very well

for the Julie Rafters
of this world

to kick up a stink
when they've got 50 years

of marriage
under their belt.

No one wants you
to be lonely, Mom,

especially not me.

I hope you have a great time.

Call me if there are
any disasters at the club.

There won't be.

Ben and I have got
this covered.

Oh, sorry.

I'll just leave those
right there.

We're going to need some more
champagne from the cool room.

And a bucket of ice
to throw over those two.

Ugh. If we weren't
rostered on together,

it's possible
this could be the most

depressing night in my life.

Oh, God,
what is he doing here?

Gee, you've got a full house
in here tonight.

-Granddad, what are you doing?
-You're going to be late

-for dinner.
-No, no, I'm early,

aren't I?
Donna said 7:00.

But Mom's waiting
for you at home.

No, she's not.
We're meeting here.

No, I promise you
she's at home.

She's going to think
you've stood her up.

Oh, no, I'm going to have
to get another cab.

No, a cab, tonight,
you'll be waiting awhile.

I'll take you. Can you handle
everything here?

Oh, just get him to dinner.

We're on our way.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, wait.

Excuse me.

No woman can stay angry
once you arrive with these.

Let's go.
But just in case

Donna's the exception
to the rule,

there, that'll get you
in the good books for sure.

That's it.
That's all I've got.

After that,
you're on your own.

They're dripping
all over me.

Just go.

♪ I don't know what it is
That surrounds me ♪

♪ But I'm gonna to try
To give it a name ♪

♪ I'm gonna try to get
Some directions ♪

♪ So I can find my way
Back again ♪

I know I'm late, sorry.

I hope you didn't think
I changed my mind.

Oh, no, not at all.

I knew something
must've happened.

Maybe just for a minute

I thought you might've
got cold feet.

Nothing of the sort.

Oh, Ted, you shouldn't have.

Happy Valentine's, Donna.

Oh, they're beautiful!

And they're just like
the ones I ordered

-for the club.
-No.

It's almost as if you read
my mind.

- Oh, they're gorgeous.

-Thank you.
-Not nearly as pretty

as the woman
I bought them for.

You charmer.

Anyone would think it was
Valentine's Day.

Yeah, it looks great.
It smells even better.

Yes. Well, I can't
take any credit for that.

I picked up some dinner
from that new Italian bistro.

-What, the one by the servo?
-Yeah. Just heating it up.

-Is this for me?
-Uh, no, my other husband.

Sorry, I didn't buy you
anything.

Well, what are those?

Anyway, it's just
something silly.

See, told you.

Are you kidding?
I'll never take these off,

unless of course
there's good reason to.

Ooh.
There's some bubbles...

In the bucket, yes.

You know, I'm surprised
we still do Valentine's Day

-after all these years.
-Yeah, me too.

Ted gone out?

Yeah, he's having dinner
with Donna.

What, tonight?

Mm.

Oh.

- Oh, no.
-What?

Well, I ordered veal.
Does that look like veal?

-It's hard to tell.
-Mmm.

Well, I'm sure it'll be
delicious whatever it is.

Hmm.

Anyway, happy Valentine's Day.

Happy Valentine's Day.

If you're trying to bore me
out of my brain, bro,

-it's working.
-If you don't like it,

-don't watch it.
-Hey.

Has anyone seen
where I put my keys?

-Does anyone care?
-Oh, mate,

if that's all the
love I get in return,

that's the last time
I'm sending you

-a Valentine's card.

- I've got it.
-It was a joke.

-Yeah, whatever!
-Hello.

All right,
stay in a mood, Your choice.

Ah-ha!

Right, I'm out of here.

The last chance
to change your mind,

-if you want to come along?
-I don't.

Oi, oi, it's a phone call
for you, mate.

- Right. Who is it?
-Um, well, I don't know.

It's just some chick,
but she's pretty desperate

-to speak to you.
-Who is it? Is it...

It's not stalker girl?

Who can I say is calling?

Oh. Right.

-What'd she say?
-Yeah, okay.

I'm so sorry I don't know
how to tell you this but...

It is.
It's stalker girl, isn't it?

Oh, that's the first time
you looked happy all night.

-Tell her I'm not here.
-No, no, no,

-you've got to speak to her.
-No, no, no, I'm out of here.

Oi, she's pregnant.

She just told me.

Dude.

Are you...
Are you serious?

Speak to her, speak to her.

Hello?

No, no, I do not have time
to participate

in a marketing survey
right now.

Thank you for calling. So are
we all good now? Are we?

You should've seen
the look on your face, man.

What do you reckon?

Oi, come on, I mean, two
good-looking blokes like us

being tragic
on Valentine's Day.

I mean, is there something
wrong with this picture?

No, I'm not interested.
I'm staying here.

Suit yourself.

Wait five minutes.
I'll be with you, Boots.

I'd offer to clean up,
but there's no point.

That's one thing you never
need to ask around me.

I've had a really lovely time
tonight, Ted.

To think I was so nervous
about asking you

-in the first place.
-Were you?

Oh, I almost didn't go
through with it.

Well, I'm very glad you did.

I really enjoyed tonight,
Donna.

Thanks for asking me.

You sure you don't want
to stay for a cup of tea

or anything?

Look, the taxi's on its way.

I better make tracks.

Well, goodnight then.

Goodnight.

-Oop.

Just be warned,
given Retta's meltdown today,

I've no idea what we're
walking into.

Who needs skywriting
and fireworks

when you've got
Carbo and Retta?

How cute are those two?

Seriously.

I love you.

And no words at all
can be just as full on.

I love you for being
such a good friend.

It's just so sweet.

Morning, Bootsy!

Oh, you're evil.

How was your night?

No idea.

Who was there?

Oh, the usual no hopers.

-But Frankie, yeah?
- Yup.

So, how did that pan out?

I don't know, she's a hard one
to read, that one.

-I reckon we're just mates.
-Mmm.

Oh, you should've seen Jakey
make the moves

on one of her friends.

-True?
- Yeah.

It was painful to watch.

She wouldn't have
a bar of him.

-Of course.

Top marks for effort
though on Jake's part,

because she was gorgeous.

Yup, yup.

-You right?
-Hey.

Hey.

-Good to see you again.
-I'm going to take Sian home

and then I'm going to go
to work from there.

Okay, mate, see you there.

See you, boys.

Unbelievable.

Is this all right?
Do I look the part?

Jules, it's radio.

-Yeah, I know that.
-Well, you can sit there

in your undies
and no one needs to know.

Right. So I should show up
in my knickers,

is that what you're saying?

You look great.

It's just I was having
nightmares last night about

being asked a question
and just going blank.

Well, just say anything,
that's what Adam says.

Yeah. Just whatever pops
into my head.

As long as there's no
dead air.

Oh!

Are you okay?

And you're back on 2CRRS.

And joining me this morning

-is Julie Rafter who writes...

...a very funny parenting
column in the local paper.

Thanks for joining us
this morning, Julie.

It's my pleasure.

-Mommy.

So, Julie,
you've got four kids.

Three who are
in their twenties

and one who's almost two.
That's quite an age gap.

Yes, it is.

-How nervous does she sound?
-Shh.

Oh, and I'd be lying
if I said that was planned.

- Oh, mom! -I mean, at this stage

of my life I didn't think
I'd be looking after

a toddler again.

Not that I'd change it
for the world, of course.

Of course we wouldn't.

Well, your last column,

it was about being...

How should we say this,
an older mother?

Yes, well, sadly these days,
you're a geriatric mom

if you're 36
and I'm a little bit

-over that.

It makes you sound
ancient, doesn't it?

Oh, I like to be honest.
Some days I do feel that way.

I think she's starting
to warm up now.

You wrote
that you worry about

not having
as much energy as you did

when your older children
were young.

Yes.

Um...

Come on, come on.

CPR.
She's dying.

Come on, mom.
Come on.

You were saying not having
as much energy and...

Well, uh, but then again
I tell myself

that age is just
a state of mind, isn't it?

I mean, look at my dad.
If he's out there chasing

a woman half his age,
then why should I be worried

about looking after
a toddler?

That's the power
of words. Right there.

You know, of course I want
my dad to be happy, I do.

Just as long as you don't know
any of the details?

Well, yes, considering
the woman he's seeing

is my best friend,
that's exactly right.

Oh, so this
is an autumn spring romance

-we're talking about?
- Yes. Autumn spring.

With about 20 extra years
in between.

Well that was...

Ooh.

Well, she certainly
filled in the blanks.

Do you think Donna
was listening?

I don't think there's a chance
in hell that she wasn't.

Sorry I'm late.
Car's still in

at the mechanics
and the bus was ages.

I don't know, a car crash
or something.

Yeah, I think
we just heard it.

-What did I miss?

- Nothing.
-Did you have fun last night?

-Yeah, it was good.
-I think some of us

had more fun than others
of course.

Oh, and suddenly
the text message

I got from Sian
makes more sense.

Our friend here
has been a very naughty boy.

Jealousy doesn't
suit you, mate.

Hey, we should do it
again sometime.

-Get together, see a gig.
-Yeah. Yeah.

If you're getting
a group together,

I could drag myself along.

Okay, so who's going
to go first, you or me?

-Imagine...
-No. That's a dangerous game

when we don't have
to go back to work.

We could just sail off
to Tahiti together?

Oh, and you're saying it
like it's a bad thing.

Not in my world.

Mine either.

All right.

It's my turn.

Imagine that I wasn't
too scared

to mention the fact

that I dropped
the L-bomb last night.

Imagine that I didn't actually
try and cover when I said it.

♪ And how long
You looked for ♪

I said it.
And I mean it.

And I'm not going to lie
about the way I feel.

But that doesn't mean
you have to say it back.

It doesn't.

And I can wait to hear
those words said back to me.

I really can.

Words are what
connect us to each other,

but only if we've
got the guts

to put them out there
in the first place.

♪ Ooh ♪