One Night in... (2020–…): Season 1, Episode 2 - The Natural History Museum - full transcript
This programme contains strong
language and adult humour
As Britain head bedwards
and off goes the light
and we in our jimjams
turn in for the night,
somewhere a legendary tourist
attraction is about to witness
some out of hours action.
They've given the keys
and opened the gates to two of
the country's very best mates.
This is madness.
Whah.
You're not normally allowed
to do this sort of thing.
Oh, brilliant.
Comedians Josh Widdicombe
and Alex Brooker are going on
an adventure of a lifetime.
Oi.
Look at that.
As a nine-year-old,
I dreamed of this.
Just there's no-one here.
So good.
We are, uh, an odd couple.
Hello, Josh, you all right mate?
Oh, my God I d...
I do not like that.
We've got absolutely
nothing in common. Argh.
But we got on very well.
Hello. Ah, mate. Well done.
But they won't be on their own.
They've also invited some lucky
mates to share the night with them.
Arrrrrr.
Whoa.
Nothing's off limits as they're left
unsupervised for the whole night.
I feel like Robin Hood.
HE GUFFAWS
Oh, God.
Keep pumping.
To make sure they don't
fall asleep on us,
we'll set them challenges
wherever they go...
Do something that you think
has never been done before.
You get a fish, you get a fish.
And put their friendship
to the test...
Ow, I'll save you, I'll
save. Stop, put me down.
Like never before.
You're my best mate.
I love you, pal.
It does feel
a bit like we're going to star in
our own kind of little buddy film.
Which is worrying cos that
mainly makes you think
of Thelma and Louise.
I hope it's one
with a happy ending.
Hold on. Aargh.
This week Alex and Josh are
joined by pal Aisling Bea...
Waaah. Whoa.
As they're let loose in one of
the most iconic
institutions in the world.
Three mates, millions
of priceless artefacts,
no grown-ups.
This is one Night In The
Natural History Museum.
Ah, there he is.
Yes. At last.
All right? I feel like
I'm picking up Paddington.
HE CHUCKLES
I'm genuinely
excited about this.
I think there's going to be
so much cool stuff in there.
Get in. I will be quite
amazing. I'm going to say it,
this is probably going to be
like nothing else I've ever done.
What the hell is that?
My overnight bag.
I'm not helping you
dispose of a body.
When did you join the mafia?
I've watched Night at the
Museum, it's an absolute hoot.
So if it's anything like that.
Climb over, whoa, be careful
of that, it's fragile.
OK. A little mini Owen Wilson
dressed as a cowboy, yes, please.
Oh, I've trapped my
pillow in the door.
SNICKERS
Right, the Natural
History Museum please.
Last week at Alton Towers,
Alex was victorious
in the challenges.
Tonight it's Josh's
chance to even the score.
I'm quite confident
in the challenges.
Are you? You're not
normally like that.
No, I know, but the
opposition's quite weak. Um...
Whoa.
So I won last week. I
want to keep that going.
I think I will,
I... I'm not just going to
suddenly go oh, let's even it up.
I think this is the
first time in all
the years I've known you I've
ever heard you talk smack.
If I lose to him it does it
feels like you're really at
the bottom of the pile.
He's quite low hanging
fruit, isn't he?
Have you been to the Natural
History Museum before?
I've been on a school trip to
the Natural History Museum,
but I definitely
don't remember it.
They say if you can remember
the Natural History Museum
you weren't really there.
I went on a school trip,
which was a Mediterranean cruise
and we went to the Pyramids.
What? I went to the
pyramids on a school trip.
What? Yeah, genuinely.
When I was 11, uh, we went
on a school trip to B&Q.
We did.
I went to a small school,
there–there was only
four kids in my year.
So obviously they
couldn't afford like to go
to places like that.
And if that sounds like
an Enid Blyton novel,
uh, I'll tell you the name
of the other three kids in
the year and, uh, confirm it to
you, they were Thomas Bowsants,
Joanna Porters and
Genevieve Waghorn.
Meanwhile you're at the
Pyramids on a camel.
Yeah, it was groovy.
Wasn't allowed on the camel,
the same reason I wasn't
allowed on the ski trip.
So what are you looking
forward to most about
the Natural History Museum?
Um, obviously any Egyptian
stuff, that's, that's one.
I presume you're joking. No.
I know there's the big whale
there cos I remember that.
Dinosaurs, uh,
like Egyptian shit.
It's history so surely we've,
we've got so many artefacts
from around the world,
you can't tell me... They're
in the British Museum, mate.
The British Museum?
Yes.
But that's historical.
But not naturally historical.
I think what's interesting
about the friendship between me
and Alex is we've got
absolutely nothing in common.
That Tutankhamen head,
we don't want that,
leave that to the British Museum.
We like, we don't have that.
It's not a the museums aren't
like. It's not historical enough.
It's not historical enough with stuff and
like that. It's not transfer deadline day,
they're not all trying
to buy the same thing.
I'm cultured, I'd
say what's Alex read?
Instagram stories,
that's about it.
As always, our two have invited
a mate along to join
them for the night.
So let's talk about who
we've invited tonight.
I can't imagine anyone who's
going to be more enthusiastic.
This time it's actor and
comedian Aisling Bea.
Lads.
Lads?
I'm actually really
excited about the night.
I might try and jump up
on a few kind of, um...
animals just to make sure
they're definitely dead.
I can't imagine anyone who's
going to be more enthusiastic.
Yeah. About... Are you excited
to see whether at 3am, finally...
I would love to see
the enthusiasm drop.
I'm good at following rules.
Yeah.
Like, and I don't mind rules.
I think rules are important.
Here we bleeding are.
Look there's people there talking
about how good the Egyptian bit was.
Do I have a favourite?
I don't think you
can pick between them
because, like, they're
both sort of the same size.
I can't always tell
which one's which.
Here we are.
Lads!
That's a lot of
stuff, Aisling Bea.
Oh, a few bits and bobs. BOTH:
How long are you staying?
Have you brought a black canoe?
What? What's that?
Don't you worry about
what's in my bag?
But, yeah, I can't say
I've got a favourite.
I feel like this is the
start of one of those...
badly budgeted reality
dating TV shows.
And I'm like,
"Yeah, so my first thoughts are
they're both really handsome
"And they're both really
chatty, which is nice.
"So, I think it's going
to be a good evening."
Open to the public in 1881,
the Natural History Museum
was founded by the man,
who invented the word
dinosaur, Sir Richard Owen.
But tonight, as the tourists head
home and the guards clock off,
this world-famous museum and its
80 million priceless artefacts
have been left in the care...
of these three.
I think this, is it? Yeah,
it's got a flag, innit?
I think we look like Harry Potter,
Ron Weasley and Hermione grew up,
got tired and are now going
back to their school reunion.
Ooh!
Whoa!
Nice.
That is amazing.
Hintze Hall is the
museum's main entrance
and features some of the most
extraordinary fossils on the planet.
All watched over by the godfather
of evolution, Charles Darwin...
and the bones of a 25 metre
long blue whale called Hope.
Big, innit? I knew you
were going to say it's big!
I knew you were going
to say it's big.
Alex said, "It's
big, isn't it?"...
Whales are big.
Ah, to be fair,
whales are big, Alex.
Which I'd say is possibly the most
base observation I've ever seen...
anyone give upon
entering a museum.
That is amazing
though, isn't it?
Look at that!
How good is this,
no people in it?
It does make you want to just
like really run around it,
like, just really quickly.
Just really run around it!
Whoa!
Can't stop me, security.
Look at that. Oh,
I'm out of shape!
It's 19:01.
Time for security guard Geoff
to lock them in for the night.
AISLING GASPS
Whoa. Oh, my God.
Thanks, Geoff.
Does that mean we're...? Well,
that was horribly spooky.
Shall I go and try the door?
Yeah, if you want. Guys, can I ask
a little bit of a fun question?
Yes, because I'm
scared, so please, do.
Who do you think out of the three
of us will die first tonight?
You know in that movie
with Bruce Willis,
where he has to save the world?
And you're like,
"Really, those guys?"
That's kind of how I feel
about this adventure of ours.
Urgh.
Oh, that's really good.
That's really good.
Of all the people to have
this experience for a night,
really, these guys?
That's it, just us.
This is just us.
Oh, is that Charles
Darwin? Old Cha D.
Do you know what? He looks
like absolutely no craic.
No, he's not a laugh, is he?
Over the next 12 hours,
we'll be sending them texts
to guide them through the night.
There's a text message. Yeah.
"Welcome to your one night in
The Natural History Museum."
This feels like Love Island's
gone really upmarket.
I've got a text!
Charles Darwin, I got a text!
You've got a text. Right.
Best start with a
few ground rules.
"There are just a few rules
to follow, while you're here."
Ooh!
"If you break it,
you pay for it."
I feel like this is a text
from the insurers. Yeah. OK.
"Some of the exhibits
are priceless."
Sorry, I would pay for it, but
you can't put a price on it.
Yeah, it's priceless. So, we'll
just have to not pay for it, then.
"There will be challenges.
"Whoever wins the
most will be exempt...
"from cleaning duties."
I am not cleaning the
Natural History Museum.
No, I'm not. It's massive.
With so many rules but clean before
you leave and thinks like that,
it did feel a bit like
we're staying in an Airbnb.
But what an Airbnb!
If they start... Genuinely, if
they started renting this place out
for weekends to stay
in, a bit of coin.
Oh, look at this guy. This
is very Jurassic Park.
That is!
My worry with this, Brooks,
is all these bones...
is that, we're going to leave,
there'll be a few bones missing
and you'll have
supplemented your body.
The first episode
of The Last Leg,
you'll have like a
huge dinosaur foot.
THEY LAUGH
That's nice, isn't
it? Do you know what?
It's a bit wrinkly
in the middle.
You understand why you have skin
though, don't you, cos it...
You're a lot better
looking with skin. Yeah.
I have never been to
a museum with Alex
and I imagine that's because
Alex has never been to a museum.
Because there isn't a Craig
David museum, is there?
I'll be honest with you,
this isn't the sort of thing that
I'd be suggesting for a day out.
I like, like, garage music, boy
bands, drinking. I like football.
I don't want to bring
the tone down... Yeah.
That giraffe's got some
girth on it, innit?
Oh, my God.
Oh, my God!
Look at that!
I didn't think I'd leave the Natural
History Museum feeling inadequate.
Speaking of this giraffe's sack,
it makes me wonder what
have you in yours, Alex?
Oh, really, really nice. Well...
Yeah, yeah... I've been
looking forward to this.
I never understand why people
just stand staring at something
for like ten minutes.
Once I've seen something,
I'm done with it.
I've got something...
AISLING GASPS
which you're going to bloody
love. No way. No, you didn't!
Look at that. Oh, my God!
Alex! You've got two.
There's one. One for you.
And you said he wasn't fun.
Obviously, we're
on our own. Yeah.
You're not normally allowed
to do this sort of thing.
Here we go. Oh, my word! Whoa!
Now, I see why
kids are like this.
This is brilliant!
Do you know what? I've never
been on a scooter before.
Whoa! Whoa!
It's one of those things,
I think if at school,
they'd given me a scooter, then
I would've actually probably
have been in the Olympics by
now or something like that.
Hoo-hoo! Brooks... What?
It's very difficult to read
the signs on the scooter.
Yeah, I know. That's
why I got them.
So, I genuinely believe
this whole museum,
if we do it right, I know we're
meant to be there all night,
but I reckon we can be
done in, like, half hour.
Here you go, done.
Dinosaur, done.
That's real... Tree fossils.
That's not why you're
doing it, Brooks,
so you can get museum
done in five minutes.
Some rock...
I don't really want to be stood
with Josh, while he's just like...
And you know what I mean, he
would be there, like, doing that.
I don't understand how you wouldn't
read the things in a museum...
cos you want to know what it is.
Otherwise, you're just
looking at a... a spoon.
Yeah, let's get
down here. Quick.
Down there? Yep,
follow the bell.
Let's ride!
Woohoo!
Dinosaurs!
Lads, wait for me.
BELL RINGS
With dinosaurs,
fossils, minerals and...
the gift shop still
to be discovered,
they'd better get a scoot on.
Wee, wee!
Look at that!
Woo! Oh, no, that's actually
more difficult than it looks.
So, that's just a big dolphin?
When you go round a museum, right,
the word "just" is really offensive
to the people that
have put it together?
I'm worried that Alex isn't
into the museum enough.
He keeps saying the word "just".
These are just the big dolphins.
That word "just" again.
Stop saying "just".
He's no Stephen Fry,
is he, let's be honest?
Stuffed animals aren't
for me. I don't...
I don't see the appeal in it.
WHISPERS: I just
think it's weird.
I mean, how can you
go from moon rock...
to a stuffed otter?
What does impress you, Alex?
Or are you just like Shania
Twain going round museums?
♪ That don't impress me much
♪ Ba-ba-ba-da
♪ So, you got the moves
but have you got the touch?
♪ Yeah, now don't get me wrong,
yeah, I think you're all right
♪ But that won't keep me warm
in the middle of the night. ♪
♪ That don't impress me much. ♪
The museum boasts 29
million animal exhibits.
That's a lot of stuffed stuff
to stuff into one night.
Oh, my God. Look, birds. Birds.
Birds, birds,
lads. Birds. Birds!
The Birds Gallery is full of
every kind of feathery friend
from as far back as the 1800s.
Some of which are now extinct.
Oh, my God. Look,
a couple of dodos!
But also, lads...
THEY GROAN
AISLING CHUCKLES
Flightless bird.
What's the point of being
a bird, if you can't fly?
That's how I often
feel as a dancer.
THEY LAUGH
It's time for the first
challenge of the night.
PHONE PINGS
Oh! We've got a text.
"Did you know there are
78 terracotta monkeys
"Hidden in the
walls of the museum?
"Now, it's your turn...
"to hide."
Get off me.
I'm hiding!
"Have a game of hide-and-seek.
"Josh, you're the seeker."
Oh, what?!
I've got to count to 100.
One, two, three... What?
Four... Have I got...? Have
we got to hide in here?
Five, six, seven...
Slower... eight - I'm scared
somebody might hit me -
nine, ten...
It's less hide-and-seek and
more hide-and-freak-out.
This is an absurd game
to play in a huge museum.
Josh!
It's 21:34 in The
Natural History Museum
and we've set Aisling, Alex
and Josh their first challenge.
13, 14, 15...
A game of hide-and-seek anywhere
in this vast six-storey
Victorian building.
Right, I'm going this
way, so don't copy me. OK.
Oh, my God.
24, 25...
Oh, I hate running so much.
This is...
absolutely awful.
Oh, wow! This is awesome.
MUSIC: Theme from Jurassic
Park by John Williams
Alex has found the
Dinosaur Gallery.
The museum is home to the
UK's largest collection
of dinosaur fossils, including
157 different species.
Well, I love dinosaurs,
so I just thought this was
like the perfect place to hide.
I love Jurassic Park.
I've got the Michael
Crichton novel.
Believe me, that's a big old
book for a nine-year-old boy.
I just binned it off in the
end. I knew what happened.
I'm trying to hide.
39, um... 40, 41...
Oh, my God... 42...
Oh, my giddy aunt!
CHOIR SINGS
Meanwhile, Aisling has found the
museum's answer to Tiffany's...
The lost city of crystals.
Including the largest
topaz in the world.
This is so powerful
right now, guys.
Oh, my God! This is stunning.
I'm really excited about the gems
and stones part of the museum.
Oh, my God, look at
all these crystals.
I always tend to have
magical crystals.
So, I'll always bring a few
of those around with me.
God, I hope I don't like
put one of them down
and accidentally pick
a really valuable one
because that would be an
accident, if it happened.
74, 75, 76...
I don't know where to
hide. I need something big.
I think I've underestimated
how big I am.
To me, I saw this
gap and thought...
"he'll never see me", but...
I'm going to try and
find somewhere else.
I've got to shimmy
out like a snake.
Oh, no!
I've got...
dust all over me. Dinosaur dust.
95, 96, 97, 98, 99, 100.
They went this way.
Oh! First mistake.
Unlucky, guys.
Keep up!
Hello, Aisling, Alex?
Come out, come out,
wherever you are.
That's not going to work, is it?
I'm starting to wish I hadn't
worn a bright red dress.
Where are you going
to hide in this place?
DINOSAUR ROARS
Oh, look at that!
Wow, that's mint.
With Josh on his way,
it looks like Alex is running
out of places to hide.
He ain't going to
find me behind that.
Also, I know Josh.
I know he's not got the bottle
to go past a no entry sign.
Crisps, why not?
Let's enjoy ourselves.
Salt and vinegar.
£1.60, enjoy.
That was actually quite a...
This is genuinely an absurd
game to play in a huge museum.
I wikipedia-ed the
museum, it's 12 acres.
Oh, my God, I could
be here for years...
before he finds me.
I'm too bloody stubborn
to give myself up.
I'd rather die here in
this room full of stones
than tell Josh
Widdicombe where I am.
Oh, I can hear her!
Hello?
WHISPERS: Ssh, ssh! Shut up.
Right... Look at the
size of that gem!
I know you're in here, Aisling.
I don't.
Come on.
Josh!
Jesus Christ.
That was terrifying.
Oh, my God. You even
threw crisps at me.
I threw crisps at
you in self-defence.
That was...
so satisfying to see
his scared little face.
Here's your crisps.
Thank you very much.
I am now sweating,
not because I'm hot,
but just because the
amount of adrenaline
that's going through my
body is making me sweat.
They just need to find Alex now.
Right, I'll go that
way, you go that way.
No, we're not
splitting up, Josh.
That is, of course, if
Aisling can stay focused.
Oh, my God, that's
a tiny chimpanzee.
Yeah, it's not Alex Brooker.
He was a gentle giant.
He died of heart failure!
Come on, come on.
He didn't deserve that.
Let's go. He was so young.
Let's go and find
a gentle giant.
He was beautiful.
If anyone can guess where Alex is
hiding, surely it's best mate, Josh?
Alex, come out.
I knew he was into dinosaurs.
He's in here, isn't he?
He's absolutely in here.
I don't... I'm now scared
cos you jumped out on me.
I went to Australia with
Alex for three weeks
and he watched Jurassic
World every two days.
Oh, my God, this
is absolutely cool.
Alex.
He's got to be here.
It was like he'd had a tricky
break-up with Chris Pratt
and he couldn't
quite get over it.
By the way, Josh. Yeah.
Not many men can pull of a
head torch. Thanks, mate.
No, I... I mean that. Not many
men can pull off a head torch.
DINOSAUR ROARS
SHE MIMICS A DINOSAUR
Please, stop it.
Please. Genuinely, please.
Argh! Stop!
You're so scared.
Argh. Oh, my God! There's
a big T-rex moving.
Alex, are you in there? Alex!
Alex!
Where is he?
Argh! I found him, I found
him, I found him, I found him!
Alex, I can see you.
All right? You all right?
Whoa.
It was definitely fun to
find Alex crouched and sweaty
in a corner beside a T-rex.
Well, that was a good, fun game.
I mean you talk about history,
there's a load of my DNA on one
of the stone pillars in there.
Years to come, they'll
dust that off and, um...
Yeah, find out about me.
It's got very little
arms, hasn't it?
I feel like this is where
my episode of Who Do You
Think You Are would end?
PHONE BEEPS
Oh. Oh.
He's got a text!
"The winner of
hide-and-seek, it's Aisling."
Oh, my God.
Oh.
What I heard on the text
was we hide, Josh seeks.
Josh sought, didn't find me.
Did you not find Aisling?
Well, no, she jumped out
and she made me scared
and I threw a packet of crisps
at her. That doesn't count.
No, I'm not a sore loser,
what are you on about?
Congratulations, Aisling.
Well done, Aisling.
How much did he crap
himself, when you jumped out?
Oh, my God! He threw
potatoes at the Irish person.
It's now 00:06, and with some of the
world's most prestigious exhibitions
surrounding them, what
will they choose next?
Right, here we
absolutely bloody go.
The... the shop? The shop!
It's the best bit.
Love the gift shop.
The gift shop is
brilliant, isn't it?
Oh, my God. You could
literally get that in a Tesco.
You couldn't, mate,
not at this price.
That is... that is punchy.
Oh, my God, chocolate coins.
Have we just come in
here to steal some stuff?
No, not at all.
The thing I always used to find
weird about school trips was
a big thing to get for like a
memento was like a key ring...
but you didn't have keys.
I'm nine. I didn't
have house keys.
Like, my mum was
always in to let me in.
Alex! Oh, yes, please.
Jurassic Park.
Now, we're talking.
Oh, look, dodo Christmas
tree decorations.
What sizes have they
got? Small and medium.
Oh, gutted.
I remember when we used
to go on school tours,
you used to like be given,
like, £4 and you'd be like,
"I've got to bring back something
for everybody in my family."
WHISPERS: Precious.
I was trying to think like,
"What does my mother love?"
And I brought her home a
pound of ground beef mince.
You look like Steven Spielberg
on one of those documentaries,
talking about how he
animated the triceratops.
Do an American accent.
I don't want to do
an American accent.
Do an American accent, Josh.
I don't even know
where to start.
You know I'm bad with
accents. I can't do it.
IMITATES AMERICAN ACCENT: Gee...
Jeff Goldblum was
a... great guy.
Was that good? I love it. Yeah.
It's brilliant. Yeah?
It's just like he was
in the room, Josh.
Hey, guys, there's been
a crime down at the lake,
let's get down there.
Everyone stick together. We
got to stick together, guys.
I feel like if we're here,
there's no point doing the exact
same stuff that the public do.
We should be like going snooping,
seeing what's really going on here.
Go on, Alex, down the
stairs on the scooter.
Let's go. No, actually, don't!
Well, this is a
moment, isn't it?
Here we go. Are you...
are you just going? Go on.
Come on, nerds. I
don't know about that.
Mammy and Daddy
aren't here, now.
Come on, guys,
who's watching us?
We can just do whatever
we want, you know.
That's how risk averse I am.
Stop being such a
nerd! All right, OK.
Stop being such a nerd. OK.
What if we find like the alien
from Roswell or something?
Here we go.
Oh! Argh, I don't like that.
This is... I'm very ner... Josh!
OK, OK. Stop being such a baby.
Josh is a lot more
of a big old baby...
than I thought he
was going to be.
Shall we go... Down, down, down.
Down? Into the basement.
Oh, God.
He sort of was a bit like...
I'm like "Oh, come on, mate."
Deep in the bowels
of the building
lies the museum's strictly
off-limits scientific research unit.
This says...
Formaldehyde/ethanol
detection warning beacons.
Ha-ha, you go in first, Alex.
Oh.
I'll put my prosthetic in first.
Just go.
Get in, you old baby. Get in!
Oh. Whoa, look at that!
Oh, my God. Yeah,
but what's that?
That could be at a
butcher's or anything.
Last time I saw one of these,
I came out with one less foot.
THEY LAUGH
Please, keep this door closed.
Argh, argh!
Argh!
As the trio discover
what lurks beneath...
Urgh!
Holy... For God's
sake. Oh, my God.
Can Josh conquer his fears?
It was like something
from a nightmare
and that's going to
stick with me forever.
By day The Natural History Museum
welcomes thousands f visitors,
marvelling at its 29
million animal exhibits.
But tonight, three comedians
are discovering what happens,
when the tourists leave.
And they're left to explore
every inch of the museum...
even the bits that
are off limits.
Argh, argh!
Argh! Oh, genuinely, argh.
I did not like that.
Oh, my God.
It's the murder room.
AISLING SHRIEKS
I don't know if I...
I don't know... It's not nice.
It's not the murder room,
it's actually the Tank Room -
a creepy subterranean chamber,
housing some of the museum's
20 million wet specimens.
All preserved in alcohol.
Holy... Oh, my God.
For God's sake!
Basically, loads of
scary pickled stuff.
I'm a vegetarian.
SHE GAGS
This is mint.
This is horrible.
It's fish.
This is insane.
Oh, my God. Look at that thing!
That dreamboat is a
giant salamander, Josh.
That Tank Room was like
something from a nightmare
and that's going to
stick with me forever.
That is why you never go
past the barrier in a museum.
This is the best thing.
Like, how cool is this?
I never thought I'd be this
fascinated by fish in jars.
Oh, wait now, if it's seafood I'm
actually into it, cos I love squid.
How good is this, though?
This is like that bit in
Independence Day with the alien.
Yeah, it is. Yeah, but that's
not a good thing, Alex.
What? Are you dead inside?
No, well, these are.
THEY LAUGH
Here, look, Josh. Don't
touch it, don't touch it!
It's all right. Look,
he's looking at you now.
Josh, he's found a
friend. Here he is. Hello!
IN HIGH-PITCHED VOICE: Hello,
Josh. You all right, mate?
So, the man who hates museums
has found something he likes.
His interest is purely
academic, of course.
That room with all the
fish in jars was amazing.
Also Josh was hating it,
which I absolutely loved.
Look at this one, it's a full
octopus. Oh, I do not like that!
Oh, what?
You can see all of its suckers.
Oh, don't!
It was absolutely brilliant.
He really did not... did
not like the fish in jars.
You know when you go
to a service station
and someone doesn't
flushed the toilet?
Oh, God, Alex.
So, is it just brine, like...?
Brine, sunflower
oil or spring water.
Yeah.
I was like, wait a minute,
should we be in here?
But then, once you're in
there, you're just sort of...
You just feel like
a bit of calamari
and a spaghetti
marinara, to be honest.
That says 1938 on that one.
It missed the Second
World War, so...
good time to get out.
That was so good.
All these old fish.
There's some from the
1700s just in a jar.
Come on, you proper old fish.
I think that's pretty...
pretty, like, cool, isn't it?
Do you know what, seriously...?
Right, I'm done with
this room. Yeah.
I have learned my lesson and
I will never be going into
the weird shit zone
of a museum again.
Well, I tell you what,
there better be some
more stuff in jars.
It's 2:09am
and all that pickled fish has
made these three a little hungry.
Right, £20 for a midnight feast.
Do you know what this reminds
me of? Naked Attraction.
Yeah, OK, oh, oh.
What's inside?
Kids' meal boxes and I'm
going to spend my final £2
on something to
throw at Aisling.
Argh! It's a bag of crisps.
Oh, that is absolutely... Stand
there. Ow that hit me in the ear.
What are you boys
liking to eat today?
Where are you from?
What can I do you for?
Norway but my mother
was from Glasgow.
You sound like Mrs Doubtfire.
I do, dear. Now, OK, boys,
well, have a lovely day.
Thank you very much.
Thank you, cheers.
Thank you. Bye.
Just off the cafe
is the Earth Hall,
home to Sophie the Stegosaurus
and even a tiny piece of the moon.
Ah, moon rock.
Moon rock.
This rock was collected
and brought back to Earth
by astronauts during
the Apollo 16 mission.
Loved that movie.
I'll be honest...
Yeah, Houston, uh,
we have a memento.
The sign clearly
says no food or drink
so you can't eat there, guys.
Uh, guys?
Here we go.
Mm.
Would you like to go into space?
I think I've got a tough
enough time on Earth as it is.
Yeah, it's... I don't need it.
There's places in the
world I haven't been.
I don't need to go to space.
I just think it'd be quite cool.
Would you not feel isolated
and alone? More so than normal?
No, I'd like to think I'd be going,
I'm not going on me own. Like...
Who would you go with?
If I had to choose,
Justin Timberlake.
Craig David, Thierry
Henry, Danny Dyer.
Genuinely one of the worst
nights I could ever imagine.
What? What an awful
mix of people.
Why? You've got two sopranos
and two altos there.
I feel like you could pull
together a really good band.
Imagine Timberlake and Craig
David duetting. That's a dream.
Yeah, it is for Craig David,
it's not the dream
for Justin Timberlake,
I can tell you that for free.
No, it's not, I'll
give you that.
I can see Josh's face start
to get that sort of...
sort of look.
Like a kid at a toddler's
party around 5pm.
You know how I thought
I'd be completely fine?
Yeah.
I feel absolutely awful.
I feel like I might
not be a real boy.
Do you know what I mean?
Welcome to my world.
What time do you normally
stay up until, Josh?
10pm. Josh.
This morning, my three-month-old
son woke up at 4am.
So I've almost done,
basically done 24 hours now.
Oh, my God, that's
too much, Josh.
There's no such thing
as too much Josh.
Um, do you know what, that's
not the kind of thing I'd say
if I was in a good place.
Yeah!
I've lost it.
It's now 3:28am.
With these three feeling tired,
a trip to the museum's mammal
collection should wake them up.
Mammals.
That's us. Aw.
Oh, look at him.
Angry little bugger. Oh.
Oh, my word, do not like him.
Look at him.
Ah, mammals with pouches.
It sounds like an
indie band, doesn't it?
Oh, good, just in time, I really
can't look at them any more.
OK. The Natural History
Museum is famous
for its blue whale, Hope.
But did you know the click
from a sperm whale can kill
a human who happens
to be too close.
The click?
Yeah, a click. It
sounds like this.
LOUD CLICK
But loud enough to
burst your eardrums.
You must now compete in a
mammal impression challenge.
I can't even do
Steven Spielberg.
Go round the corner and
up to the mammal gallery.
OK. Oh, my God.
That could have been worse,
cos that could have been a clicking
challenge then in which case...
I'm not backing myself.
Has your click
ever killed anyone?
Like that?
The mammal gallery
has everything.
From an Arctic musk ox,
an ancient rhino relative
and whales in their
natural habitat in the sky.
Here we go. This is
like my worst nightmare.
Go on. Each do your best
impression of a whale.
There are instructions next
to you if you need some help.
You can imitate the sound of
a whale by just moving the air
between your mouth and lungs.
Without letting any air
escape, hold your nose,
close your mouth,
say O three times.
So shall we do it in turn?
Yeah, go on, OK.
Ooh, my ears have popped.
Just stop, you're going
to blow out your eyeballs.
Your eyes are starting to bulge.
The last thing you need is one
of your eyes to pop out. What?
So who's the best there?
Are they going to tell us?
What is this, Whale
Idol? Who's judged?
Now do your best
dolphin impression.
It's getting pretty
crazy town, to be honest.
Like, as the night wears on
and we're all sort of
losing our minds a bit.
I've been surprised at Josh's
commitment to the impressions.
Spielberg, whale, the dolphin.
Aww. What? Mother, I think we
should break its neck, it's injured.
Come on now! Come on.
Go on, what's the next one?
Frank Spencer.
Now do your best
elephant impression.
How was that?
It looks like you're just
checking if you've got BO.
Oh, my God, I'm deliriously
tired now. We absolute...
I just can't think
straight any more. Come on.
This is like how my mum
used to get me to stand
when I had my
benefit assessment.
Oh, that was good!
That was brilliant.
Yeah, I had to get
into character.
The winner of the impressions
challenge is Alex.
What? No!
What? What, just
for the elephant?
The elephant was good
though, wasn't it?
Yeah, oh, it was the elephant.
The elephant was good.
I mean, I don't know where
that elephant noise came from.
I couldn't do it again if I
tried. I can't do, I can't.
He can't even do it now!
No, I could take it on something
else, but performing, acting? Urgh.
I think I did more character
than maybe you did,
but it was, as a noise...
Yeah, yours had more depth.
Cos I'm a trained actor and
Alex is just like, you know,
football fan or whatever.
And it's just like, you know,
whatever, I didn't really care.
So it doesn't
matter, so, whatever.
You hate impressions. Yeah.
And I've seen you
do four tonight.
Give me a call, Channel 4. Rory
Bremner's shitting himself.
Is this it?
Have we all just passed
away through tiredness?
As the night draws
on, things turn weird.
I'm coming up on a trip, man.
It's 4:39am.
While most of the nation
is tucked up in bed,
inside The Natural History
Museum, Josh, Aisling and Alex
are descending into delirium.
We're going to have to cross it.
Last time, we crossed it we ended
up in the most sinister room.
Be a big boy, Josh.
You can do it,
Josh. Be a big boy.
You are saying that, aren't you?
That's not going in my head.
You are speaking, right?
Get up the stairs! Come on,
look, nothing's happened.
The police aren't going
to come and get us.
Here we go. What will happen?
Ah. Whoa. Whoa.
SHE HUMS
I don't know what
you're talking about,
I feel like I'm having... The
worry is you don't know whether
you're ascending to heaven or going
into the fiery pits of hell, do you?
Oh, this is really high.
I'm actually getting
real freaked out now.
Aisling. Like a recurring dream.
Oh, my word, here we
go, we're entering.
Oh. Wow.
Oh, my God. Oh, man alive.
You shouldn't be worrying
that you're tripping in
The National History
Museum. Natural History.
I can't, I can't
even say it right.
But like I'm looking at things,
I'm like is that really there or
is that part of the tiredness?
But, but because of the way I'm
feeling I am thinking am I dead?
Oh, my God, that looking
down... Oh, my word.
It is getting a little,
a little spooky.
That's weird, isn't it?
Just like looking
up a whole corridor
and just seeing nothing
except dead bones.
Just a little bit, you know...
I'm not sure if one of them's going
to move or something like that.
Is this it?
Have we all just passed
away through tiredness?
Have we just...? And now
we're going to meet our maker?
If I do go up to heaven, I'd love
an escalator rather than stairs.
In just a few hours,
the doors to The Natural
History Museum will reopen.
But there's still time
for one more challenge
to decide the winner,
and of course the losers who
will have to do the cleaning up.
The last time I was
looking at that whale
I was in a very
different mental place.
Very different mental place.
Ooh, ah, he's got a text!
Every year, five million different
people walk through these doors.
That's impressive, isn't it?
That is actually impressive.
Bragging. Yeah.
Do something that you think
has never been done before in
The Natural History Museum.
Most unique idea wins.
Let's go.
High up here. I wonder
whether I could use that?
Don't worry, it's not jump.
What have I got in
my overnight bag?
Get ready for a childhood
dream to come true.
This goes here.
While Josh gets on
with whatever that is,
arch-rival Alex is
looking for the PA system.
I'm going to bring this place
alive the only way I know how.
One, two.
So that's what Aisling
had in her overnight bag.
Slinkys coming down the stairs.
Fly my pretties!
Fly!
Oh.
There we go. Go on, girl!
I could genuinely do this.
This was a lot more dramatic in my
head when I thought about doing it.
One last finishing touch.
This is an Art Attack!
But what actually is it?
It's a dinosaur.
Not sure which type but it is
a di... A general dinosaur.
Meanwhile, Alex is
getting the party started.
What's this, what is this?
I guarantee you no-one has ever
had a garage party in here before.
I'll give you that.
Think of that,
half of this stuff wishes
it was still alive.
How good is this?!
I just love the idea of
like Rewind echoing around
all of this history.
Stuff that's like
millions of years old.
One of the greatest garage anthems
of all time ringing around,
absolutely brilliant.
And that's my history
there. That's my history.
I'm having the time of my life.
It's supposed to be a rave,
not a pyjama party, Aisling.
How good is this?
I mean, yeah, good, good, good.
I feel like I've lost my mind
and I've just to be like,
"I'm coming up on a trip, man."
Oh, got a text.
The winner of this
challenge is Alex.
Oh, my God. What?
Congratulations, Alex,
you are the winner
of one Night In The
Natural History Museum.
Go and put your
feet up... Foot up.
That's a bit needless.
Josh and Aisling, you must
now clear up the mess.
Oh, for crying out loud.
Right.
We aren't competitive,
we're friends.
But it was nice to see him lose.
Do you know what,
I might just...
Just chill underneath Hope?
I don't think Neil Buchanan's
ever been humiliated like that.
But, you know, I suppose
everyone has to start somewhere,
don't they? I don't know what
his early Art Attacks were like.
I'm going to start
by clearing up this.
No, I'm not.
I'm not cleaning up.
It's news to me
that I haven't won.
Because, you know, in the game of
life I think I'm still pretty much
ahead of those two bozos.
Do you know what, lads? If
I'm to maintain my physique,
my 19-year-old's face
and everything else,
I'm going to have to go
to sleep immediately.
So I'll clean up.
You didn't do an amazing impression
of Steven Spielberg or a whale,
so I sort of feel like you get out
what you put into these things,
Josh, do you know what I mean?
Cheers, guys. It's been
an absolute pleasure.
Oh, it's been lovely hanging
out with you, Josh, genuinely.
Thank you, Josh. Thanks, Josh.
While the winner, and for some
reason Aisling, go to sleep,
the loser has to sweep.
Josh, I can still hear your feet
gently dabbling along the floor.
So if you could just...
Can you shuffle a
bit quieter, please?
Quieter, please. Thank
you, Josh. Thanks, Josh.
Skid mark from a scooter,
that's not going to go down well
with the bods at
head office, is it?
Fair enough, Alex
won, but, you know,
he is a very annoying man.
I bet they're already asleep.
I'm going to stop
talking to you now.
And the reason for that is
I have to take the bins out,
so that'll be fun, won't it?
I mean, it's kind of a once
in a lifetime opportunity
that I can't really believe
we've been allowed to do.
It's been fun, hasn't it?
I think when people
watch this footage back,
the one word that they
will use will be romantic.
Alex, we can hold
hands if you're scared?
Oh, I'm knackered, but I've also got
a bit of a headache from laughing
at Josh and Aisling. So that
was like, it was brilliant.
I lost, I'll admit I lost
but genuinely mind-blowing.
We'll always have one Night In The
Natural History Museum, won't we?
Goodnight, mate. Aw,
night, Alex, love you.
Night, Josh. Night, Josh.
Next time, we've got
the keys to London Zoo.
I still need them.
Oh, my God, look at
the size of that one!
What's wrong with you?
What is it, is it a horse?
Subtitles by Red Bee Media
language and adult humour
As Britain head bedwards
and off goes the light
and we in our jimjams
turn in for the night,
somewhere a legendary tourist
attraction is about to witness
some out of hours action.
They've given the keys
and opened the gates to two of
the country's very best mates.
This is madness.
Whah.
You're not normally allowed
to do this sort of thing.
Oh, brilliant.
Comedians Josh Widdicombe
and Alex Brooker are going on
an adventure of a lifetime.
Oi.
Look at that.
As a nine-year-old,
I dreamed of this.
Just there's no-one here.
So good.
We are, uh, an odd couple.
Hello, Josh, you all right mate?
Oh, my God I d...
I do not like that.
We've got absolutely
nothing in common. Argh.
But we got on very well.
Hello. Ah, mate. Well done.
But they won't be on their own.
They've also invited some lucky
mates to share the night with them.
Arrrrrr.
Whoa.
Nothing's off limits as they're left
unsupervised for the whole night.
I feel like Robin Hood.
HE GUFFAWS
Oh, God.
Keep pumping.
To make sure they don't
fall asleep on us,
we'll set them challenges
wherever they go...
Do something that you think
has never been done before.
You get a fish, you get a fish.
And put their friendship
to the test...
Ow, I'll save you, I'll
save. Stop, put me down.
Like never before.
You're my best mate.
I love you, pal.
It does feel
a bit like we're going to star in
our own kind of little buddy film.
Which is worrying cos that
mainly makes you think
of Thelma and Louise.
I hope it's one
with a happy ending.
Hold on. Aargh.
This week Alex and Josh are
joined by pal Aisling Bea...
Waaah. Whoa.
As they're let loose in one of
the most iconic
institutions in the world.
Three mates, millions
of priceless artefacts,
no grown-ups.
This is one Night In The
Natural History Museum.
Ah, there he is.
Yes. At last.
All right? I feel like
I'm picking up Paddington.
HE CHUCKLES
I'm genuinely
excited about this.
I think there's going to be
so much cool stuff in there.
Get in. I will be quite
amazing. I'm going to say it,
this is probably going to be
like nothing else I've ever done.
What the hell is that?
My overnight bag.
I'm not helping you
dispose of a body.
When did you join the mafia?
I've watched Night at the
Museum, it's an absolute hoot.
So if it's anything like that.
Climb over, whoa, be careful
of that, it's fragile.
OK. A little mini Owen Wilson
dressed as a cowboy, yes, please.
Oh, I've trapped my
pillow in the door.
SNICKERS
Right, the Natural
History Museum please.
Last week at Alton Towers,
Alex was victorious
in the challenges.
Tonight it's Josh's
chance to even the score.
I'm quite confident
in the challenges.
Are you? You're not
normally like that.
No, I know, but the
opposition's quite weak. Um...
Whoa.
So I won last week. I
want to keep that going.
I think I will,
I... I'm not just going to
suddenly go oh, let's even it up.
I think this is the
first time in all
the years I've known you I've
ever heard you talk smack.
If I lose to him it does it
feels like you're really at
the bottom of the pile.
He's quite low hanging
fruit, isn't he?
Have you been to the Natural
History Museum before?
I've been on a school trip to
the Natural History Museum,
but I definitely
don't remember it.
They say if you can remember
the Natural History Museum
you weren't really there.
I went on a school trip,
which was a Mediterranean cruise
and we went to the Pyramids.
What? I went to the
pyramids on a school trip.
What? Yeah, genuinely.
When I was 11, uh, we went
on a school trip to B&Q.
We did.
I went to a small school,
there–there was only
four kids in my year.
So obviously they
couldn't afford like to go
to places like that.
And if that sounds like
an Enid Blyton novel,
uh, I'll tell you the name
of the other three kids in
the year and, uh, confirm it to
you, they were Thomas Bowsants,
Joanna Porters and
Genevieve Waghorn.
Meanwhile you're at the
Pyramids on a camel.
Yeah, it was groovy.
Wasn't allowed on the camel,
the same reason I wasn't
allowed on the ski trip.
So what are you looking
forward to most about
the Natural History Museum?
Um, obviously any Egyptian
stuff, that's, that's one.
I presume you're joking. No.
I know there's the big whale
there cos I remember that.
Dinosaurs, uh,
like Egyptian shit.
It's history so surely we've,
we've got so many artefacts
from around the world,
you can't tell me... They're
in the British Museum, mate.
The British Museum?
Yes.
But that's historical.
But not naturally historical.
I think what's interesting
about the friendship between me
and Alex is we've got
absolutely nothing in common.
That Tutankhamen head,
we don't want that,
leave that to the British Museum.
We like, we don't have that.
It's not a the museums aren't
like. It's not historical enough.
It's not historical enough with stuff and
like that. It's not transfer deadline day,
they're not all trying
to buy the same thing.
I'm cultured, I'd
say what's Alex read?
Instagram stories,
that's about it.
As always, our two have invited
a mate along to join
them for the night.
So let's talk about who
we've invited tonight.
I can't imagine anyone who's
going to be more enthusiastic.
This time it's actor and
comedian Aisling Bea.
Lads.
Lads?
I'm actually really
excited about the night.
I might try and jump up
on a few kind of, um...
animals just to make sure
they're definitely dead.
I can't imagine anyone who's
going to be more enthusiastic.
Yeah. About... Are you excited
to see whether at 3am, finally...
I would love to see
the enthusiasm drop.
I'm good at following rules.
Yeah.
Like, and I don't mind rules.
I think rules are important.
Here we bleeding are.
Look there's people there talking
about how good the Egyptian bit was.
Do I have a favourite?
I don't think you
can pick between them
because, like, they're
both sort of the same size.
I can't always tell
which one's which.
Here we are.
Lads!
That's a lot of
stuff, Aisling Bea.
Oh, a few bits and bobs. BOTH:
How long are you staying?
Have you brought a black canoe?
What? What's that?
Don't you worry about
what's in my bag?
But, yeah, I can't say
I've got a favourite.
I feel like this is the
start of one of those...
badly budgeted reality
dating TV shows.
And I'm like,
"Yeah, so my first thoughts are
they're both really handsome
"And they're both really
chatty, which is nice.
"So, I think it's going
to be a good evening."
Open to the public in 1881,
the Natural History Museum
was founded by the man,
who invented the word
dinosaur, Sir Richard Owen.
But tonight, as the tourists head
home and the guards clock off,
this world-famous museum and its
80 million priceless artefacts
have been left in the care...
of these three.
I think this, is it? Yeah,
it's got a flag, innit?
I think we look like Harry Potter,
Ron Weasley and Hermione grew up,
got tired and are now going
back to their school reunion.
Ooh!
Whoa!
Nice.
That is amazing.
Hintze Hall is the
museum's main entrance
and features some of the most
extraordinary fossils on the planet.
All watched over by the godfather
of evolution, Charles Darwin...
and the bones of a 25 metre
long blue whale called Hope.
Big, innit? I knew you
were going to say it's big!
I knew you were going
to say it's big.
Alex said, "It's
big, isn't it?"...
Whales are big.
Ah, to be fair,
whales are big, Alex.
Which I'd say is possibly the most
base observation I've ever seen...
anyone give upon
entering a museum.
That is amazing
though, isn't it?
Look at that!
How good is this,
no people in it?
It does make you want to just
like really run around it,
like, just really quickly.
Just really run around it!
Whoa!
Can't stop me, security.
Look at that. Oh,
I'm out of shape!
It's 19:01.
Time for security guard Geoff
to lock them in for the night.
AISLING GASPS
Whoa. Oh, my God.
Thanks, Geoff.
Does that mean we're...? Well,
that was horribly spooky.
Shall I go and try the door?
Yeah, if you want. Guys, can I ask
a little bit of a fun question?
Yes, because I'm
scared, so please, do.
Who do you think out of the three
of us will die first tonight?
You know in that movie
with Bruce Willis,
where he has to save the world?
And you're like,
"Really, those guys?"
That's kind of how I feel
about this adventure of ours.
Urgh.
Oh, that's really good.
That's really good.
Of all the people to have
this experience for a night,
really, these guys?
That's it, just us.
This is just us.
Oh, is that Charles
Darwin? Old Cha D.
Do you know what? He looks
like absolutely no craic.
No, he's not a laugh, is he?
Over the next 12 hours,
we'll be sending them texts
to guide them through the night.
There's a text message. Yeah.
"Welcome to your one night in
The Natural History Museum."
This feels like Love Island's
gone really upmarket.
I've got a text!
Charles Darwin, I got a text!
You've got a text. Right.
Best start with a
few ground rules.
"There are just a few rules
to follow, while you're here."
Ooh!
"If you break it,
you pay for it."
I feel like this is a text
from the insurers. Yeah. OK.
"Some of the exhibits
are priceless."
Sorry, I would pay for it, but
you can't put a price on it.
Yeah, it's priceless. So, we'll
just have to not pay for it, then.
"There will be challenges.
"Whoever wins the
most will be exempt...
"from cleaning duties."
I am not cleaning the
Natural History Museum.
No, I'm not. It's massive.
With so many rules but clean before
you leave and thinks like that,
it did feel a bit like
we're staying in an Airbnb.
But what an Airbnb!
If they start... Genuinely, if
they started renting this place out
for weekends to stay
in, a bit of coin.
Oh, look at this guy. This
is very Jurassic Park.
That is!
My worry with this, Brooks,
is all these bones...
is that, we're going to leave,
there'll be a few bones missing
and you'll have
supplemented your body.
The first episode
of The Last Leg,
you'll have like a
huge dinosaur foot.
THEY LAUGH
That's nice, isn't
it? Do you know what?
It's a bit wrinkly
in the middle.
You understand why you have skin
though, don't you, cos it...
You're a lot better
looking with skin. Yeah.
I have never been to
a museum with Alex
and I imagine that's because
Alex has never been to a museum.
Because there isn't a Craig
David museum, is there?
I'll be honest with you,
this isn't the sort of thing that
I'd be suggesting for a day out.
I like, like, garage music, boy
bands, drinking. I like football.
I don't want to bring
the tone down... Yeah.
That giraffe's got some
girth on it, innit?
Oh, my God.
Oh, my God!
Look at that!
I didn't think I'd leave the Natural
History Museum feeling inadequate.
Speaking of this giraffe's sack,
it makes me wonder what
have you in yours, Alex?
Oh, really, really nice. Well...
Yeah, yeah... I've been
looking forward to this.
I never understand why people
just stand staring at something
for like ten minutes.
Once I've seen something,
I'm done with it.
I've got something...
AISLING GASPS
which you're going to bloody
love. No way. No, you didn't!
Look at that. Oh, my God!
Alex! You've got two.
There's one. One for you.
And you said he wasn't fun.
Obviously, we're
on our own. Yeah.
You're not normally allowed
to do this sort of thing.
Here we go. Oh, my word! Whoa!
Now, I see why
kids are like this.
This is brilliant!
Do you know what? I've never
been on a scooter before.
Whoa! Whoa!
It's one of those things,
I think if at school,
they'd given me a scooter, then
I would've actually probably
have been in the Olympics by
now or something like that.
Hoo-hoo! Brooks... What?
It's very difficult to read
the signs on the scooter.
Yeah, I know. That's
why I got them.
So, I genuinely believe
this whole museum,
if we do it right, I know we're
meant to be there all night,
but I reckon we can be
done in, like, half hour.
Here you go, done.
Dinosaur, done.
That's real... Tree fossils.
That's not why you're
doing it, Brooks,
so you can get museum
done in five minutes.
Some rock...
I don't really want to be stood
with Josh, while he's just like...
And you know what I mean, he
would be there, like, doing that.
I don't understand how you wouldn't
read the things in a museum...
cos you want to know what it is.
Otherwise, you're just
looking at a... a spoon.
Yeah, let's get
down here. Quick.
Down there? Yep,
follow the bell.
Let's ride!
Woohoo!
Dinosaurs!
Lads, wait for me.
BELL RINGS
With dinosaurs,
fossils, minerals and...
the gift shop still
to be discovered,
they'd better get a scoot on.
Wee, wee!
Look at that!
Woo! Oh, no, that's actually
more difficult than it looks.
So, that's just a big dolphin?
When you go round a museum, right,
the word "just" is really offensive
to the people that
have put it together?
I'm worried that Alex isn't
into the museum enough.
He keeps saying the word "just".
These are just the big dolphins.
That word "just" again.
Stop saying "just".
He's no Stephen Fry,
is he, let's be honest?
Stuffed animals aren't
for me. I don't...
I don't see the appeal in it.
WHISPERS: I just
think it's weird.
I mean, how can you
go from moon rock...
to a stuffed otter?
What does impress you, Alex?
Or are you just like Shania
Twain going round museums?
♪ That don't impress me much
♪ Ba-ba-ba-da
♪ So, you got the moves
but have you got the touch?
♪ Yeah, now don't get me wrong,
yeah, I think you're all right
♪ But that won't keep me warm
in the middle of the night. ♪
♪ That don't impress me much. ♪
The museum boasts 29
million animal exhibits.
That's a lot of stuffed stuff
to stuff into one night.
Oh, my God. Look, birds. Birds.
Birds, birds,
lads. Birds. Birds!
The Birds Gallery is full of
every kind of feathery friend
from as far back as the 1800s.
Some of which are now extinct.
Oh, my God. Look,
a couple of dodos!
But also, lads...
THEY GROAN
AISLING CHUCKLES
Flightless bird.
What's the point of being
a bird, if you can't fly?
That's how I often
feel as a dancer.
THEY LAUGH
It's time for the first
challenge of the night.
PHONE PINGS
Oh! We've got a text.
"Did you know there are
78 terracotta monkeys
"Hidden in the
walls of the museum?
"Now, it's your turn...
"to hide."
Get off me.
I'm hiding!
"Have a game of hide-and-seek.
"Josh, you're the seeker."
Oh, what?!
I've got to count to 100.
One, two, three... What?
Four... Have I got...? Have
we got to hide in here?
Five, six, seven...
Slower... eight - I'm scared
somebody might hit me -
nine, ten...
It's less hide-and-seek and
more hide-and-freak-out.
This is an absurd game
to play in a huge museum.
Josh!
It's 21:34 in The
Natural History Museum
and we've set Aisling, Alex
and Josh their first challenge.
13, 14, 15...
A game of hide-and-seek anywhere
in this vast six-storey
Victorian building.
Right, I'm going this
way, so don't copy me. OK.
Oh, my God.
24, 25...
Oh, I hate running so much.
This is...
absolutely awful.
Oh, wow! This is awesome.
MUSIC: Theme from Jurassic
Park by John Williams
Alex has found the
Dinosaur Gallery.
The museum is home to the
UK's largest collection
of dinosaur fossils, including
157 different species.
Well, I love dinosaurs,
so I just thought this was
like the perfect place to hide.
I love Jurassic Park.
I've got the Michael
Crichton novel.
Believe me, that's a big old
book for a nine-year-old boy.
I just binned it off in the
end. I knew what happened.
I'm trying to hide.
39, um... 40, 41...
Oh, my God... 42...
Oh, my giddy aunt!
CHOIR SINGS
Meanwhile, Aisling has found the
museum's answer to Tiffany's...
The lost city of crystals.
Including the largest
topaz in the world.
This is so powerful
right now, guys.
Oh, my God! This is stunning.
I'm really excited about the gems
and stones part of the museum.
Oh, my God, look at
all these crystals.
I always tend to have
magical crystals.
So, I'll always bring a few
of those around with me.
God, I hope I don't like
put one of them down
and accidentally pick
a really valuable one
because that would be an
accident, if it happened.
74, 75, 76...
I don't know where to
hide. I need something big.
I think I've underestimated
how big I am.
To me, I saw this
gap and thought...
"he'll never see me", but...
I'm going to try and
find somewhere else.
I've got to shimmy
out like a snake.
Oh, no!
I've got...
dust all over me. Dinosaur dust.
95, 96, 97, 98, 99, 100.
They went this way.
Oh! First mistake.
Unlucky, guys.
Keep up!
Hello, Aisling, Alex?
Come out, come out,
wherever you are.
That's not going to work, is it?
I'm starting to wish I hadn't
worn a bright red dress.
Where are you going
to hide in this place?
DINOSAUR ROARS
Oh, look at that!
Wow, that's mint.
With Josh on his way,
it looks like Alex is running
out of places to hide.
He ain't going to
find me behind that.
Also, I know Josh.
I know he's not got the bottle
to go past a no entry sign.
Crisps, why not?
Let's enjoy ourselves.
Salt and vinegar.
£1.60, enjoy.
That was actually quite a...
This is genuinely an absurd
game to play in a huge museum.
I wikipedia-ed the
museum, it's 12 acres.
Oh, my God, I could
be here for years...
before he finds me.
I'm too bloody stubborn
to give myself up.
I'd rather die here in
this room full of stones
than tell Josh
Widdicombe where I am.
Oh, I can hear her!
Hello?
WHISPERS: Ssh, ssh! Shut up.
Right... Look at the
size of that gem!
I know you're in here, Aisling.
I don't.
Come on.
Josh!
Jesus Christ.
That was terrifying.
Oh, my God. You even
threw crisps at me.
I threw crisps at
you in self-defence.
That was...
so satisfying to see
his scared little face.
Here's your crisps.
Thank you very much.
I am now sweating,
not because I'm hot,
but just because the
amount of adrenaline
that's going through my
body is making me sweat.
They just need to find Alex now.
Right, I'll go that
way, you go that way.
No, we're not
splitting up, Josh.
That is, of course, if
Aisling can stay focused.
Oh, my God, that's
a tiny chimpanzee.
Yeah, it's not Alex Brooker.
He was a gentle giant.
He died of heart failure!
Come on, come on.
He didn't deserve that.
Let's go. He was so young.
Let's go and find
a gentle giant.
He was beautiful.
If anyone can guess where Alex is
hiding, surely it's best mate, Josh?
Alex, come out.
I knew he was into dinosaurs.
He's in here, isn't he?
He's absolutely in here.
I don't... I'm now scared
cos you jumped out on me.
I went to Australia with
Alex for three weeks
and he watched Jurassic
World every two days.
Oh, my God, this
is absolutely cool.
Alex.
He's got to be here.
It was like he'd had a tricky
break-up with Chris Pratt
and he couldn't
quite get over it.
By the way, Josh. Yeah.
Not many men can pull of a
head torch. Thanks, mate.
No, I... I mean that. Not many
men can pull off a head torch.
DINOSAUR ROARS
SHE MIMICS A DINOSAUR
Please, stop it.
Please. Genuinely, please.
Argh! Stop!
You're so scared.
Argh. Oh, my God! There's
a big T-rex moving.
Alex, are you in there? Alex!
Alex!
Where is he?
Argh! I found him, I found
him, I found him, I found him!
Alex, I can see you.
All right? You all right?
Whoa.
It was definitely fun to
find Alex crouched and sweaty
in a corner beside a T-rex.
Well, that was a good, fun game.
I mean you talk about history,
there's a load of my DNA on one
of the stone pillars in there.
Years to come, they'll
dust that off and, um...
Yeah, find out about me.
It's got very little
arms, hasn't it?
I feel like this is where
my episode of Who Do You
Think You Are would end?
PHONE BEEPS
Oh. Oh.
He's got a text!
"The winner of
hide-and-seek, it's Aisling."
Oh, my God.
Oh.
What I heard on the text
was we hide, Josh seeks.
Josh sought, didn't find me.
Did you not find Aisling?
Well, no, she jumped out
and she made me scared
and I threw a packet of crisps
at her. That doesn't count.
No, I'm not a sore loser,
what are you on about?
Congratulations, Aisling.
Well done, Aisling.
How much did he crap
himself, when you jumped out?
Oh, my God! He threw
potatoes at the Irish person.
It's now 00:06, and with some of the
world's most prestigious exhibitions
surrounding them, what
will they choose next?
Right, here we
absolutely bloody go.
The... the shop? The shop!
It's the best bit.
Love the gift shop.
The gift shop is
brilliant, isn't it?
Oh, my God. You could
literally get that in a Tesco.
You couldn't, mate,
not at this price.
That is... that is punchy.
Oh, my God, chocolate coins.
Have we just come in
here to steal some stuff?
No, not at all.
The thing I always used to find
weird about school trips was
a big thing to get for like a
memento was like a key ring...
but you didn't have keys.
I'm nine. I didn't
have house keys.
Like, my mum was
always in to let me in.
Alex! Oh, yes, please.
Jurassic Park.
Now, we're talking.
Oh, look, dodo Christmas
tree decorations.
What sizes have they
got? Small and medium.
Oh, gutted.
I remember when we used
to go on school tours,
you used to like be given,
like, £4 and you'd be like,
"I've got to bring back something
for everybody in my family."
WHISPERS: Precious.
I was trying to think like,
"What does my mother love?"
And I brought her home a
pound of ground beef mince.
You look like Steven Spielberg
on one of those documentaries,
talking about how he
animated the triceratops.
Do an American accent.
I don't want to do
an American accent.
Do an American accent, Josh.
I don't even know
where to start.
You know I'm bad with
accents. I can't do it.
IMITATES AMERICAN ACCENT: Gee...
Jeff Goldblum was
a... great guy.
Was that good? I love it. Yeah.
It's brilliant. Yeah?
It's just like he was
in the room, Josh.
Hey, guys, there's been
a crime down at the lake,
let's get down there.
Everyone stick together. We
got to stick together, guys.
I feel like if we're here,
there's no point doing the exact
same stuff that the public do.
We should be like going snooping,
seeing what's really going on here.
Go on, Alex, down the
stairs on the scooter.
Let's go. No, actually, don't!
Well, this is a
moment, isn't it?
Here we go. Are you...
are you just going? Go on.
Come on, nerds. I
don't know about that.
Mammy and Daddy
aren't here, now.
Come on, guys,
who's watching us?
We can just do whatever
we want, you know.
That's how risk averse I am.
Stop being such a
nerd! All right, OK.
Stop being such a nerd. OK.
What if we find like the alien
from Roswell or something?
Here we go.
Oh! Argh, I don't like that.
This is... I'm very ner... Josh!
OK, OK. Stop being such a baby.
Josh is a lot more
of a big old baby...
than I thought he
was going to be.
Shall we go... Down, down, down.
Down? Into the basement.
Oh, God.
He sort of was a bit like...
I'm like "Oh, come on, mate."
Deep in the bowels
of the building
lies the museum's strictly
off-limits scientific research unit.
This says...
Formaldehyde/ethanol
detection warning beacons.
Ha-ha, you go in first, Alex.
Oh.
I'll put my prosthetic in first.
Just go.
Get in, you old baby. Get in!
Oh. Whoa, look at that!
Oh, my God. Yeah,
but what's that?
That could be at a
butcher's or anything.
Last time I saw one of these,
I came out with one less foot.
THEY LAUGH
Please, keep this door closed.
Argh, argh!
Argh!
As the trio discover
what lurks beneath...
Urgh!
Holy... For God's
sake. Oh, my God.
Can Josh conquer his fears?
It was like something
from a nightmare
and that's going to
stick with me forever.
By day The Natural History Museum
welcomes thousands f visitors,
marvelling at its 29
million animal exhibits.
But tonight, three comedians
are discovering what happens,
when the tourists leave.
And they're left to explore
every inch of the museum...
even the bits that
are off limits.
Argh, argh!
Argh! Oh, genuinely, argh.
I did not like that.
Oh, my God.
It's the murder room.
AISLING SHRIEKS
I don't know if I...
I don't know... It's not nice.
It's not the murder room,
it's actually the Tank Room -
a creepy subterranean chamber,
housing some of the museum's
20 million wet specimens.
All preserved in alcohol.
Holy... Oh, my God.
For God's sake!
Basically, loads of
scary pickled stuff.
I'm a vegetarian.
SHE GAGS
This is mint.
This is horrible.
It's fish.
This is insane.
Oh, my God. Look at that thing!
That dreamboat is a
giant salamander, Josh.
That Tank Room was like
something from a nightmare
and that's going to
stick with me forever.
That is why you never go
past the barrier in a museum.
This is the best thing.
Like, how cool is this?
I never thought I'd be this
fascinated by fish in jars.
Oh, wait now, if it's seafood I'm
actually into it, cos I love squid.
How good is this, though?
This is like that bit in
Independence Day with the alien.
Yeah, it is. Yeah, but that's
not a good thing, Alex.
What? Are you dead inside?
No, well, these are.
THEY LAUGH
Here, look, Josh. Don't
touch it, don't touch it!
It's all right. Look,
he's looking at you now.
Josh, he's found a
friend. Here he is. Hello!
IN HIGH-PITCHED VOICE: Hello,
Josh. You all right, mate?
So, the man who hates museums
has found something he likes.
His interest is purely
academic, of course.
That room with all the
fish in jars was amazing.
Also Josh was hating it,
which I absolutely loved.
Look at this one, it's a full
octopus. Oh, I do not like that!
Oh, what?
You can see all of its suckers.
Oh, don't!
It was absolutely brilliant.
He really did not... did
not like the fish in jars.
You know when you go
to a service station
and someone doesn't
flushed the toilet?
Oh, God, Alex.
So, is it just brine, like...?
Brine, sunflower
oil or spring water.
Yeah.
I was like, wait a minute,
should we be in here?
But then, once you're in
there, you're just sort of...
You just feel like
a bit of calamari
and a spaghetti
marinara, to be honest.
That says 1938 on that one.
It missed the Second
World War, so...
good time to get out.
That was so good.
All these old fish.
There's some from the
1700s just in a jar.
Come on, you proper old fish.
I think that's pretty...
pretty, like, cool, isn't it?
Do you know what, seriously...?
Right, I'm done with
this room. Yeah.
I have learned my lesson and
I will never be going into
the weird shit zone
of a museum again.
Well, I tell you what,
there better be some
more stuff in jars.
It's 2:09am
and all that pickled fish has
made these three a little hungry.
Right, £20 for a midnight feast.
Do you know what this reminds
me of? Naked Attraction.
Yeah, OK, oh, oh.
What's inside?
Kids' meal boxes and I'm
going to spend my final £2
on something to
throw at Aisling.
Argh! It's a bag of crisps.
Oh, that is absolutely... Stand
there. Ow that hit me in the ear.
What are you boys
liking to eat today?
Where are you from?
What can I do you for?
Norway but my mother
was from Glasgow.
You sound like Mrs Doubtfire.
I do, dear. Now, OK, boys,
well, have a lovely day.
Thank you very much.
Thank you, cheers.
Thank you. Bye.
Just off the cafe
is the Earth Hall,
home to Sophie the Stegosaurus
and even a tiny piece of the moon.
Ah, moon rock.
Moon rock.
This rock was collected
and brought back to Earth
by astronauts during
the Apollo 16 mission.
Loved that movie.
I'll be honest...
Yeah, Houston, uh,
we have a memento.
The sign clearly
says no food or drink
so you can't eat there, guys.
Uh, guys?
Here we go.
Mm.
Would you like to go into space?
I think I've got a tough
enough time on Earth as it is.
Yeah, it's... I don't need it.
There's places in the
world I haven't been.
I don't need to go to space.
I just think it'd be quite cool.
Would you not feel isolated
and alone? More so than normal?
No, I'd like to think I'd be going,
I'm not going on me own. Like...
Who would you go with?
If I had to choose,
Justin Timberlake.
Craig David, Thierry
Henry, Danny Dyer.
Genuinely one of the worst
nights I could ever imagine.
What? What an awful
mix of people.
Why? You've got two sopranos
and two altos there.
I feel like you could pull
together a really good band.
Imagine Timberlake and Craig
David duetting. That's a dream.
Yeah, it is for Craig David,
it's not the dream
for Justin Timberlake,
I can tell you that for free.
No, it's not, I'll
give you that.
I can see Josh's face start
to get that sort of...
sort of look.
Like a kid at a toddler's
party around 5pm.
You know how I thought
I'd be completely fine?
Yeah.
I feel absolutely awful.
I feel like I might
not be a real boy.
Do you know what I mean?
Welcome to my world.
What time do you normally
stay up until, Josh?
10pm. Josh.
This morning, my three-month-old
son woke up at 4am.
So I've almost done,
basically done 24 hours now.
Oh, my God, that's
too much, Josh.
There's no such thing
as too much Josh.
Um, do you know what, that's
not the kind of thing I'd say
if I was in a good place.
Yeah!
I've lost it.
It's now 3:28am.
With these three feeling tired,
a trip to the museum's mammal
collection should wake them up.
Mammals.
That's us. Aw.
Oh, look at him.
Angry little bugger. Oh.
Oh, my word, do not like him.
Look at him.
Ah, mammals with pouches.
It sounds like an
indie band, doesn't it?
Oh, good, just in time, I really
can't look at them any more.
OK. The Natural History
Museum is famous
for its blue whale, Hope.
But did you know the click
from a sperm whale can kill
a human who happens
to be too close.
The click?
Yeah, a click. It
sounds like this.
LOUD CLICK
But loud enough to
burst your eardrums.
You must now compete in a
mammal impression challenge.
I can't even do
Steven Spielberg.
Go round the corner and
up to the mammal gallery.
OK. Oh, my God.
That could have been worse,
cos that could have been a clicking
challenge then in which case...
I'm not backing myself.
Has your click
ever killed anyone?
Like that?
The mammal gallery
has everything.
From an Arctic musk ox,
an ancient rhino relative
and whales in their
natural habitat in the sky.
Here we go. This is
like my worst nightmare.
Go on. Each do your best
impression of a whale.
There are instructions next
to you if you need some help.
You can imitate the sound of
a whale by just moving the air
between your mouth and lungs.
Without letting any air
escape, hold your nose,
close your mouth,
say O three times.
So shall we do it in turn?
Yeah, go on, OK.
Ooh, my ears have popped.
Just stop, you're going
to blow out your eyeballs.
Your eyes are starting to bulge.
The last thing you need is one
of your eyes to pop out. What?
So who's the best there?
Are they going to tell us?
What is this, Whale
Idol? Who's judged?
Now do your best
dolphin impression.
It's getting pretty
crazy town, to be honest.
Like, as the night wears on
and we're all sort of
losing our minds a bit.
I've been surprised at Josh's
commitment to the impressions.
Spielberg, whale, the dolphin.
Aww. What? Mother, I think we
should break its neck, it's injured.
Come on now! Come on.
Go on, what's the next one?
Frank Spencer.
Now do your best
elephant impression.
How was that?
It looks like you're just
checking if you've got BO.
Oh, my God, I'm deliriously
tired now. We absolute...
I just can't think
straight any more. Come on.
This is like how my mum
used to get me to stand
when I had my
benefit assessment.
Oh, that was good!
That was brilliant.
Yeah, I had to get
into character.
The winner of the impressions
challenge is Alex.
What? No!
What? What, just
for the elephant?
The elephant was good
though, wasn't it?
Yeah, oh, it was the elephant.
The elephant was good.
I mean, I don't know where
that elephant noise came from.
I couldn't do it again if I
tried. I can't do, I can't.
He can't even do it now!
No, I could take it on something
else, but performing, acting? Urgh.
I think I did more character
than maybe you did,
but it was, as a noise...
Yeah, yours had more depth.
Cos I'm a trained actor and
Alex is just like, you know,
football fan or whatever.
And it's just like, you know,
whatever, I didn't really care.
So it doesn't
matter, so, whatever.
You hate impressions. Yeah.
And I've seen you
do four tonight.
Give me a call, Channel 4. Rory
Bremner's shitting himself.
Is this it?
Have we all just passed
away through tiredness?
As the night draws
on, things turn weird.
I'm coming up on a trip, man.
It's 4:39am.
While most of the nation
is tucked up in bed,
inside The Natural History
Museum, Josh, Aisling and Alex
are descending into delirium.
We're going to have to cross it.
Last time, we crossed it we ended
up in the most sinister room.
Be a big boy, Josh.
You can do it,
Josh. Be a big boy.
You are saying that, aren't you?
That's not going in my head.
You are speaking, right?
Get up the stairs! Come on,
look, nothing's happened.
The police aren't going
to come and get us.
Here we go. What will happen?
Ah. Whoa. Whoa.
SHE HUMS
I don't know what
you're talking about,
I feel like I'm having... The
worry is you don't know whether
you're ascending to heaven or going
into the fiery pits of hell, do you?
Oh, this is really high.
I'm actually getting
real freaked out now.
Aisling. Like a recurring dream.
Oh, my word, here we
go, we're entering.
Oh. Wow.
Oh, my God. Oh, man alive.
You shouldn't be worrying
that you're tripping in
The National History
Museum. Natural History.
I can't, I can't
even say it right.
But like I'm looking at things,
I'm like is that really there or
is that part of the tiredness?
But, but because of the way I'm
feeling I am thinking am I dead?
Oh, my God, that looking
down... Oh, my word.
It is getting a little,
a little spooky.
That's weird, isn't it?
Just like looking
up a whole corridor
and just seeing nothing
except dead bones.
Just a little bit, you know...
I'm not sure if one of them's going
to move or something like that.
Is this it?
Have we all just passed
away through tiredness?
Have we just...? And now
we're going to meet our maker?
If I do go up to heaven, I'd love
an escalator rather than stairs.
In just a few hours,
the doors to The Natural
History Museum will reopen.
But there's still time
for one more challenge
to decide the winner,
and of course the losers who
will have to do the cleaning up.
The last time I was
looking at that whale
I was in a very
different mental place.
Very different mental place.
Ooh, ah, he's got a text!
Every year, five million different
people walk through these doors.
That's impressive, isn't it?
That is actually impressive.
Bragging. Yeah.
Do something that you think
has never been done before in
The Natural History Museum.
Most unique idea wins.
Let's go.
High up here. I wonder
whether I could use that?
Don't worry, it's not jump.
What have I got in
my overnight bag?
Get ready for a childhood
dream to come true.
This goes here.
While Josh gets on
with whatever that is,
arch-rival Alex is
looking for the PA system.
I'm going to bring this place
alive the only way I know how.
One, two.
So that's what Aisling
had in her overnight bag.
Slinkys coming down the stairs.
Fly my pretties!
Fly!
Oh.
There we go. Go on, girl!
I could genuinely do this.
This was a lot more dramatic in my
head when I thought about doing it.
One last finishing touch.
This is an Art Attack!
But what actually is it?
It's a dinosaur.
Not sure which type but it is
a di... A general dinosaur.
Meanwhile, Alex is
getting the party started.
What's this, what is this?
I guarantee you no-one has ever
had a garage party in here before.
I'll give you that.
Think of that,
half of this stuff wishes
it was still alive.
How good is this?!
I just love the idea of
like Rewind echoing around
all of this history.
Stuff that's like
millions of years old.
One of the greatest garage anthems
of all time ringing around,
absolutely brilliant.
And that's my history
there. That's my history.
I'm having the time of my life.
It's supposed to be a rave,
not a pyjama party, Aisling.
How good is this?
I mean, yeah, good, good, good.
I feel like I've lost my mind
and I've just to be like,
"I'm coming up on a trip, man."
Oh, got a text.
The winner of this
challenge is Alex.
Oh, my God. What?
Congratulations, Alex,
you are the winner
of one Night In The
Natural History Museum.
Go and put your
feet up... Foot up.
That's a bit needless.
Josh and Aisling, you must
now clear up the mess.
Oh, for crying out loud.
Right.
We aren't competitive,
we're friends.
But it was nice to see him lose.
Do you know what,
I might just...
Just chill underneath Hope?
I don't think Neil Buchanan's
ever been humiliated like that.
But, you know, I suppose
everyone has to start somewhere,
don't they? I don't know what
his early Art Attacks were like.
I'm going to start
by clearing up this.
No, I'm not.
I'm not cleaning up.
It's news to me
that I haven't won.
Because, you know, in the game of
life I think I'm still pretty much
ahead of those two bozos.
Do you know what, lads? If
I'm to maintain my physique,
my 19-year-old's face
and everything else,
I'm going to have to go
to sleep immediately.
So I'll clean up.
You didn't do an amazing impression
of Steven Spielberg or a whale,
so I sort of feel like you get out
what you put into these things,
Josh, do you know what I mean?
Cheers, guys. It's been
an absolute pleasure.
Oh, it's been lovely hanging
out with you, Josh, genuinely.
Thank you, Josh. Thanks, Josh.
While the winner, and for some
reason Aisling, go to sleep,
the loser has to sweep.
Josh, I can still hear your feet
gently dabbling along the floor.
So if you could just...
Can you shuffle a
bit quieter, please?
Quieter, please. Thank
you, Josh. Thanks, Josh.
Skid mark from a scooter,
that's not going to go down well
with the bods at
head office, is it?
Fair enough, Alex
won, but, you know,
he is a very annoying man.
I bet they're already asleep.
I'm going to stop
talking to you now.
And the reason for that is
I have to take the bins out,
so that'll be fun, won't it?
I mean, it's kind of a once
in a lifetime opportunity
that I can't really believe
we've been allowed to do.
It's been fun, hasn't it?
I think when people
watch this footage back,
the one word that they
will use will be romantic.
Alex, we can hold
hands if you're scared?
Oh, I'm knackered, but I've also got
a bit of a headache from laughing
at Josh and Aisling. So that
was like, it was brilliant.
I lost, I'll admit I lost
but genuinely mind-blowing.
We'll always have one Night In The
Natural History Museum, won't we?
Goodnight, mate. Aw,
night, Alex, love you.
Night, Josh. Night, Josh.
Next time, we've got
the keys to London Zoo.
I still need them.
Oh, my God, look at
the size of that one!
What's wrong with you?
What is it, is it a horse?
Subtitles by Red Bee Media