On Becoming a God in Central Florida (2019–…): Season 1, Episode 2 - The Gloomy-Zoomies - full transcript
Krystal networks her way into an opportunity in the beauty pageant industry. Cody tries to be his own workhorse. Ernie builds a time capsule.
Previously...
Hello!
Who's fired up?!
If you only trust me,
I will make your dream
come true.
Krystal,
trust the Garbeau System.
[Cody] The most beautiful thing
about your business
is that you share it, together.
[Travis]
Cody gets it, honey.
If you leave CAI,
I will leave you.
Whoa!
[Cody]
Travis!
[screaming]
[Krystal] No, what I'm saying is
that my husband was on the job
when it happened.
[woman] Ma'am, your husband
was not an employee
of Founders American
Merchandise.
He was an independent
business owner.
We need to be strong
for Krystal, you know.
I can do that.
[Krystal] I have a child.
I need health insurance.
I need the mortgage
paid on time.
I need you to make this right.
-[sighs]
-I have nothing.
[Obie] I understand
that you are emotional,
but my system did not
kill your husband.
[gunshots]
An alligator did.
[screaming]
[cooing]
♪ "Angel of the Morning"
by Juice Newton ♪
♪♪♪
[dripping]
♪ There'll be no strings
to bind your hands ♪
♪ Not if my love
can bind your heart ♪
[panting]
♪ There's no need
to take a stand ♪
♪ For it was I ♪
♪ Who chose to start ♪
[grunts]
♪ I see no need ♪
-♪ To take me home... ♪
-[grunts]
[exhales]
[quietly]
Crap.
♪ ...the dawn ♪
♪ Just call me angel
of the morning ♪
♪ Angel ♪
♪ Just touch my cheek
before you leave me, baby... ♪
[Cody] Let me just interrupt you
for one second, Brenden.
To be honest, I didn't peg you
for a wham-and-scram guy.
You know? I mean,
leaving a business
just as it's about
to take off, it's...
it-it's dumb, Brenden.
It's super dumb. I'm... I...
No. No, no, no, no, no.
No, no.
I'm not calling you dumb.
I'm just saying
that you do dumb--
-[click, dial tone]
-Hello?
Brenden?
Hello?
[phone beeping]
-[exhales]
-[beep]
[grunting]
[panting]
♪ intriguing,
atmospheric music ♪
[Obie]
I know that J-O-B is a prison.
It's a prison
of your own election,
but it's still a prison.
After I dropped out of school,
as it happens,
I was a guard for
the Zephyrhills Road Prison.
I think about those long
August days at the prison.
I was overseeing the road crew
with my billy club,
making sure those animals
kept their heads down
and their tools swinging.
It was brutal work.
I was on my feet all day,
walking the line, sweating.
[on tape]
"But, Mr. Garbeau,
didn't you learn a lot
about hard work?"
[chuckles]
Yeah, sure.
I learned how
to grind myself into dust.
I learned how to kiss butts.
I learned how to be a sucker.
♪♪♪
[squeaking]
[exhales]
Goddamn it.
[Destinee cooing over monitor]
[sighs]
[Cody]
Hiya.
Brought you something.
[sighs]
Oh, God.
[exhales]
What, uh...
What's shakin'?
What do you want?
I want to talk about
Travis's business,
in light of the tragedy.
Are those...?
As you know,
Travis was a legendary
recruiter, in terms of his...
[chuckles] his attitude
and his-his commitment and...
Those will be big shoes
to fill, Krystal.
Well, the business belonged
to the both of you,
so it's, uh...
it's yours now. And I-I
understand that you've had
-some challenges--
-What do you want, Cody?
Travis's downline.
Why is it that...
I've been buying Happy Meals
with pennies, but...
[scoffs] you always seem
to be doing just fine?
That's just how
the Garbeau System works.
It takes commitment...
How many nights a week
do you spend recruiting, Cody?
[quietly]
Um...
Leave the cookie.
♪ up-tempo, dramatic music ♪
♪♪♪
♪♪♪
[alarm beeping]
[alarm stops]
[groans]
Good morning, dumpling.
[Bets]
Morning.
[yawns]
[Bets inhales]
What you doing?
[inhales]
You know what?
-Huh?
-[sniffs]
[laughing]
What are you doing?
Your armpits smell
different from each other.
What?
Yeah.
Larry smells all musty,
but Ralph doesn't smell like
anything at all.
What?
[Bets sniffs, giggles]
Huh. Ain't that something.
-Hey, Ernie?
-Hmm?
What, pickle?
Are we going to talk
about why you came home
after midnight
smelling like chlorine?
I'm sorry.
You know, it just...
it just helps.
I know, soggy britches.
I'm just worried
about you is all.
Well, you and my pillowcases.
[chuckles]
♪ quiet, ominous music ♪
♪♪♪
[Stan]
The happiest place on Earth.
The happiest place on Earth.
[scoffs]
Where does that leave
Rebel Rapids, huh?
I don't know, Stan.
Not why I'm here.
[muttering]
Shit.
[sighs]
I need cash.
Can't.
Jesus, Stan.
Oh, you think you're the
only one with problems?
We're at war here, Miss Stubbs.
And the mouse has got the money.
Now's not the time
for frivolous spending.
Frivolous?
I had to walk here
because my car's
at the bottom of a swamp.
I need a raise,
an advance, something.
You didn't walk here today.
Yeah, I saw you.
Ernie gave you a ride.
An alligator ate my husband.
Look, you're asking
for a precedent
that I can't afford to set.
But...
[clears throat]
Water-obics needs
a new instructor.
Yeah, Brenda's got
another UTI.
The woman simply won't
change out of her swimsuit.
It's pathological.
Well, do I get a raise
if I do Water-obics?
All right, it pays
ten dollars a week.
And I've been offering
Brenda two dollars a head
to goose attendance.
Wait, what?
I've seen that class.
That's, like,
16 bucks a week, tops.
Think of it as 64 a month.
Ugh, God.
Eat my shorts, Stan.
[man speaking indistinctly
over radio]
[Cody]
You are a powerful individual.
You clearly have
exceptional social skills,
and I think
you can market those.
I only offer this opportunity
to folks I know have
what it takes to succeed
in the world of business.
Sir, if you are not with
this party, you need to leave.
You already blew
your chance, Helena.
Don't blow theirs, please.
It's okay.
We were just leaving.
-[Helena] No.
-No, no, no, no, no.
You're-you're making a mistake.
This...
[door closes]
[sighs]
I see you also
like business.
You got to do
whatever you can
to stay ahead
in this economy.
Oh, no kidding.
Tough on working folks.
You seem like
the type of guy
who stays on top
of things.
-Informed.
-Well...
you got to be in my industry.
And you also
have to be perceptive,
which... you clearly are.
I hear you.
Your boss must be
very happy with your work.
Oh. [chuckles]
Happier than you can imagine.
Because I am my own boss.
"Cody Boner,
-Boner Enterprises."
-It's Bonar.
-Good to meet you.
-Pat Stanley.
-Your own business, huh?
-Yes.
Taxes must be killer.
Well, actually, in my industry,
-everything is a tax write-off.
-Same here.
Would you believe
that a bona fide
billionaire is my mentor?
[scoffs]
A fellow Founders man.
[laughs]
Though I walk a different path.
Oh.
Oh.
-Buck Bridges.
-Yep.
Are you from California?
Just passing through.
Business.
Well, while
you're in Florida,
you should be representing
Founders Southeast.
Obie Garbeau II
revolutionized distribution
in Florida, and actually...
actually,
I would be happy
to incorporate you
into my downline.
Sir, you won't find a better
mentor for the Garbeau System.
In only three years, I've--
-Uh, believe me, Mr. Boner--
-Bonar.
Apologies.
Um, I want to be clear.
I'm not looking
for a new system.
Well...
-the thing is, Pete, that--
-Pat.
Pat.
The Garbeau System
is about community.
And you can't build a community
when out-of-towners show up
and muddy the waters.
Garbeau can't handle
a little mud?
[chuckles]
Tread lightly, friend.
Wait a minute.
Were you trying
to recruit those people?
Seemed pretty comfortable
taking no for an answer, Boner.
But if you ever want
to elevate your game...
beep me.
I was just going
to offer you those beans.
Missed me.
[sighs]
[man] Zuber's Tubers is
the potato specialty store...
[laughing lightly]
-Hi.
-Hi.
[Buzz] So, what kind
of game you after?
Hog?
Well, you can get
five or six hogs
on the back
of this guy, easy.
Been thinking
about going bigger,
but the permit fees
are out of control.
I did a mission trip to Belize
with Pete Heckley
over at Fish and Game.
I can get you a permit.
Y'all hear about that
gator attack last week?
I went to high school
with that fella.
Yeah, Travis Stubbs.
Took the Tornadoes
all the way in '75.
Heard that gator chomped him
in half like a gingerbread man.
Married a real
piece of ass, though.
Oh, yeah.
I'd chomp her in half.
Hey, bite your tongue.
That's a Miss Zuber
you're talking about.
Okay, okay.
Miss 1982.
Best talent
the pageant ever saw.
That poor thing.
Brittni, look at me.
When life hits one of my
girls, damn it, I hit back.
Customer.
Oh.
Welcome to Buzz's Motorsports.
[Krystal]
Really nice scent. It's lavender
with just a hint of rose hip.
Give you three bucks for this.
That jersey belonged
to a state champ.
-Give me a real offer.
-[groans]
But who would need
this much lotion?
Oh. Try some. You'll get hooked.
-Ten bucks.
-Actually, that's not for sale.
But...
[scoffs]
Ernie, what are you doing here?
Just shopping.
[chuckles]
Hey, Carol.
Hey! Hey, excuse me.
Hi, sugar.
Is this your house?
Yeah. And that's my pool
you're draining.
Oh, okay, great.
So, uh, can I talk
to a Travis Stubbs?
Hey, what are these?
Candlesticks.
What do they look like?
I'll give you both for 200.
Final offer.
And, no, Travis was eaten
by a gator.
Oh, my Lord, well,
I'm so sorry to hear that.
Well, I'm from Sunshine Repo,
and, um, your husband--
rest his soul--
he has a few things
that technically belong
to the bank, like that pool.
Oh, for shit sakes.
Well, if they need money,
I need to sell this stuff.
And I can't sell this stuff if
you're taking all my shit away.
Honey, honey, say no more.
I don't care
if it's not for sale!
Everything has its price.
$800 for that fine
swimming pool.
[whispers]
Okay, say "sold."
Sold!
[whispering] I'm-I'm gonna
need in your house.
[whispering] Do you have
to do this right now?
Yeah. I'm so sorry, hon.
[sniffles]
[sighs]
It's, uh, not name brand,
but it's the same stuff.
-Okay.
-[Rhonda] Oh! Hard to believe
all these great deals
we're getting, eh, Marvin?
-Hey.
-Hey.
Ernie,
that's all Travis's stuff.
How much for all of it?
Um...
50?
Would you take a hundred?
What?
All right.
-Here you go.
-Ernie...
you don't have to do that.
[laughs] You drive
a hard bargain, lady.
[tires screeching, horn honking]
Nope. No, no, no, no,
no, no, no, no, no. Krystal,
these things, they belong
to your downline.
-They're not to sell.
-Hey.
Okay, listen, I need you to put
all the Founders merchandise
back in your garage.
What you're doing is theft.
Did Carol tattle on me?
Doesn't matter. We get the FAM
things off the lawn pronto.
Hey. They were in my house,
they're taking up my space,
I'm selling 'em.
[whispers]
Yes, well, they're already sold.
Huh? To your downline.
Listen, I don't mean
to be Mr. Discipline here,
but Travis's business
follows a system.
Mm-hmm.
That system can still
make you rich,
but you have to follow it.
Right? You know this.
You've done this for two years.
Yeah. And the rules
always change,
so how about this system?
I give people things,
they pay me.
You are the pope of nope today.
Look at the big picture.
The volume of product
that Travis's...
that your downline buys
determines your FP,
which determines
your bonus tier.
Travis was on the verge
of jumping a tier,
giving him colossal
bonus checks.
Now, your downline
is gonna be here Thursday,
and if you've sold their
product, I mean, Krystal--
Um, okay. Sorry. Ma'am?
-Excuse me, ma'am. Sorry.
-What?
We got to have
a little talk
about the railroad tracks.
See, I'm supposed to take you
to the orthodontist
to get them removed.
Otherwise, you can't get
'em cleaned, and, well,
-we both know that ain't pretty.
-[crying]
Honey, I'm so sorry.
Do you need someone
to talk to?
If I get these things off,
it's on my terms.
Okay. Okay.
How much do I owe?
[gasps]
[sighs]
Oh, fuck.
Cody!
Listen, if I give you 600
for what you owe on the braces,
will you put the FAM goods
back in your garage
and distribute by the system?
One more time.
That's it.
[sighs]
[phone ringing]
[pan sizzling]
[Krystal]
Stubbs residence.
Leave one after the beep.
[machine beeps]
[Buzz]
Krystal? Uh, it's Buzz.
I heard about what happened
to your husband,
and I haven't been able
to stop thinking...
Well, listen,
on behalf of all of us
at the Miss Zuber pageant,
if there's anything
we can do to help,
I mean, we'd do anything
for you.
Buzz?
[engine whirring]
♪ up-tempo, optimistic music ♪
♪♪♪
[grunts]
How long till Destinee digs up
Mr. Travis's time capsule?
You know, I guess
that'll be up to Miss Krystal.
It makes me sad.
Well, it's a good thing
we're here.
'Cause it's hard to be sad
when you're doing something good
for somebody else.
♪ I've been workin'
on the railroad ♪
♪ All the live-long day ♪
[both] ♪ I've been workin'
on the railroad ♪
♪ Just to pass the time away ♪
[laughs]
[Krystal] This is to get
my water turned back on.
[Sandra] Okay. Uh,
just give me a moment
while I pull up
your account.
Oh, there you are,
Mrs. Stubbs.
And utilities...
Oh.
What's wrong?
Um, well, it looks like one
of your mortgages is past due.
-Wait, what? "One of"?
-Mm-hmm.
The second's been
delinquent since November.
We sent foreclosure notices
on November 7, 21,
December 3.
You have a balance
of $4,987
and 86 cents.
Would you like to pay that now?
Uh... how long do I have?
Um, you have to clear
the balance a week from Monday.
Otherwise, they're gonna put
a lock on your house.
-And you know how difficult--
-I know how it works. Thanks.
Mrs. Stubbs, I am so sorry
to be the bearer of bad news.
-But if... No.
-♪ Happy birthday to you ♪
-♪ Happy birthday to you ♪
-No! [laughs]
It's my birthday.
-♪ Happy birthday,
dear Sandra ♪
-Oh, my God.
♪ Happy birthday to you ♪
[indistinct chatter]
[laughter, applause]
[sighs]
[cooing]
[Buzz] Yeah, well, a boy
his age ought to start
getting comfortable
with a motorbike.
But you really
want to make sure
any kid who rides
wears a helmet.
It's a hell
of a lot of motor for...
-[whoops]
-[tires screech]
Good gravy.
I never sat on so much power.
It's like riding
a charging buffalo.
Have you ever tried
one of these?
Oh. I'm here for my son.
Well, you should try
being here for you.
Miss Zuber is forever, Krystal.
I won't leave you hurting here,
but you're not right for sales.
I just sold that lady an ATV,
and I don't even work here.
I ought to be asking
for commission.
It's not just about closing.
It's the haggle.
The money's in
the margins.
I don't just hire
salesmen who close.
I hire salesmen who close right.
Well, what the hell
does that mean?
Let me run something else
by you, Krystal.
My daughter Becca, she's
prepping for Miss Teen Zuber.
Now, I have to
recuse myself
as a judge, of course.
She's gonna need a proper coach.
Mm-hmm. Okay.
Connie Prumpton
offered to do it.
Well, Connie won Miss Zuber '84
'cause of her cans.
Can't coach Becca
to have big cans.
You still got
a way with words.
Anyway, Becca,
she's beautiful,
but she's a little spooky.
She's gonna need
to lean on her talent.
You know I owned
that talent portion.
Forever and always.
Are you still able
to do your, um...
[sighs] I don't remember
what you called it. The, uh...
dance with the things?
Never called it anything
in particular.
I'll show her myself.
[Ernie grunting]
[Bets] Well, how's it
going out there, Harold?
[grunts quietly]
Was Travis Dad's best friend?
No, honey.
Why is Dad doing this?
Well, doing something nice
for your neighbors
makes your dad feel good.
Well, why does Dad feel bad?
See, right now
Miss Krystal doesn't have
the time to feel sad,
so your dad is
being sad for her.
But he's
like this a lot.
[sighs]
Hey, Miss Destinee,
are you ready for your mama
to come get you?
It's you and me.
My sympathies,
Krystal.
[gasps] Glenna!
Oh, my God, deviled eggs.
Oh, you're so sweet.
Here, your order's right here.
Do you need help?
Uh, you can help Glenna
with her stuff.
Oh, Glenna's fine.
[Carol]
Oh, Krystal,
I'm just checking. Have you
been pressing hard enough
for the triplicates?
-Yes, Carol.
-Hmm.
-Bitch.
-[Cody] Don't.
Carol is your-- and my-- upline.
I agreed to distribute
to Travis's downline,
-not kiss Carol's ass.
-It wasn't my idea
to bring her here, okay?
The Wilkeses think you're
considering leaving FAM.
[scoffs]
I'm not considering anything.
All right, let's go
over your order quick.
[Destinee fussing]
Facial tissues,
-bandages, large...
-Hello...
[Krystal]
Powder compact, shampoo.
Cody, you can't afford
any more pop-n-drops.
Now, if you're
facing challenges
keeping Krystal engaged,
tell me. I'm here to help.
Oh, she's just
in a bad mood, Carol.
You know, it's probably
that time of the month.
I beg your pardon?
No, I just meant,
I meant, um, medically.
[sighs] Obie did
an entire seminar
on wavering downline.
I have the tape.
I think you need it.
Oh, I know
every single word
Obie's ever written
or said, I--
[Krystal]
I'm done.
Find someone else
to do this crap.
[chuckles]
Fix it.
Yes.
♪ lighthearted music ♪
[Krsytal humming]
♪♪♪
[exhales]
[pounding on door]
[Rhonda]
Knock, knock!
-Yeah?
-It's Rhonda!
The-the repo lady.
Oh. Come in.
-Door's broken.
-Okay.
I-I don't know what's left
for you to take.
Oh, no, I'm not here
on business.
Look, I-I was just thinking
about how much fun I had
pretending to buy stuff.
I don't repo cases
of $100 Scotch often.
My way of offering sympathies.
It's not a good time.
Hey!
Don't touch that.
Look, I don't meet a lot
of folk during good times.
I do meet folk when they
need a shoulder to cry on.
Yeah. Well, I'll tell you,
worst thing about him dying
is that now I can't divorce him,
so that's where I am
in terms of needing
-shoulders and such.
-Mm.
[Destinee fussing
over monitor]
I got to check on my baby,
but, um...
what the heck, come on in.
I'll grab us some mixers.
Uh, is there a body in there?
Oh, it's for a job.
I'll tell you all about it.
-Okay.
-[Cody] I get it.
She's having a tough go of
things, but she's... [sighs]
she's perfect
for the job.
I mean, the downline
practically worships her,
-you know?
-And I'm sure the widow thing
-doesn't hurt.
-No.
Not at all, Pat,
not at all.
They'd go to the ends
of the earth for her
if she asked them to.
-She ain't asking, huh?
-No.
She and Travis were barely
Bronze Jeffersons, so...
The bonuses just aren't enough
to keep her in the game.
[sighs] Okay, so I'm glad
you beeped me,
because you're right,
Mr. Bridges does have something
-to say on the matter.
-Yeah.
Yeah.
Well, a great navigator
knows when to change course.
Hit us again,
barkeep, will you?
[bell dings]
Most girls don't think
about light.
They figure, "That's for the
stage manager to worry about.
I'll just do my thing."
They're dummies.
-[chuckles]
-That's the first,
biggest
thing you need to learn:
your job isn't
to perform a talent.
It's to dazzle,
by any means necessary.
So if you want better lighting
than the other girls,
give yourself better lighting
than the other girls.
Any questions, Buzz?
Did, uh... did Travis hunt?
Nope. Have a seat.
[slurping]
Okay.
So let me ask you a question:
how's your business doing?
[chuckles] Only problem is I
might be making too much money.
Cheers to that,
brother!
I'm putting mine
in stocks and bonds.
[chuckling]
Oh, life is good.
It's good to be a successful
businessman, so take advantage.
Give her an upline bonus.
An upline bonus.
It's the same as a FAM bonus,
only it comes directly
from the upline. It's not part
of the Garbeau System?
It's your downline, Pat.
They're independent.
They're not your employee.
I mean, their money comes
from their business,
all right, not yours.
Is that what
Garbeau says?
Because Bridges would
tell you to use the value
of your business to show
this widow her value.
No wonder you're
making a change.
[laughing]
Oh, I am not making
a change, Pat.
This is Garbeau
country,
and I'm a Garbeau man.
I played you like a bassoon.
[slurping]
[stammers]
But you said that...
It's just business, Pat.
Just business.
[chuckles]
You're a sharp guy, Bonar.
If you won't
admit it to me,
admit it to yourself,
Obie Garbeau let you down.
Obie Garbeau II.
Excuse me.
If, uh, you wind up
keeping this widow,
address your
thank-you card to...
Buck Bridges I.
[slurping]
[cup clatters]
[clears throat]
I'm sorry! I'm sorry!
[both grunting]
[Heart's "Straight On"
playing]
♪ Quite some time ♪
♪ I've been sitting it out ♪
♪ Didn't take no chances ♪
♪ I was a prisoner of doubt ♪
♪ I knocked down
the wailing wall ♪
♪ Ain't no sin ♪
♪ Got the feel of fortune ♪
♪ Deal me in ♪
♪ Coming straight on for you ♪
♪ You made my mind ♪
♪ Now I'm stronger,
now I'm coming through ♪
♪ Straight on ♪
♪ Straight on for you ♪
♪ Straight on for you ♪
♪ Ooh ♪
♪ Ooh ♪
♪ Ooh, yeah, for you ♪
[music stops]
[exhales]
Okay.
The puppets do
most of the work,
and the dance is simple enough.
It's a confidence thing.
What'd you think?
[chuckles quietly]
We got to get you
talking, girl.
You haven't lost a step.
Yeah, well...
Miss Teen Zuber's in six months.
I can do three times
a week, 90 minutes,
50 bucks a session. That's
competitive with the market.
If she's not Miss Teen Zuber
come July,
I will refund you half.
Oh, and... my only request
is that you pay up front.
My money's tied up,
and I need cash. It's 4,000.
Now, Krystal,
I know when I'm being
taken for a ride.
It's competitive
with the market.
Well, not the market
I've been shopping in.
Connie was gonna do it
for 20 a session,
and not up front,
get paid as you go.
Well, Buzz, this is
a special skill.
I could do 3,500--
two grand now
and the rest weekly.
I want to help you,
but I'm not here as a charity.
Dad.
Okay, the offer is 20 a session.
2,000 total,
and I need it up front.
I can't budge on that.
Okay.
Can't do 20 a session?
How about 15?
Um...
Buzz, please, I need the cash.
I'm, like, one bad day
from losing my house.
This is what I mean when I talk
about haggling, Becca.
That's called
"surrendering your leverage."
"Leverage"?
Is that what you called it
when you were trading
tiaras for tug jobs?
Ew!
Becca, go wait in the car.
Why don't you go wait
in the car, too, Buzz?
I have been nothing
but nice to you.
Hey, you don't
fucking touch me.
Goodness gracious, woman.
I don't need to touch you.
I want my ATV back, too.
-Yeah, no shit!
-[screwdriver clatters]
[door opens and closes]
[exhales]
♪ slow, somber music ♪
[Destinee crying over monitor]
[sighs]
[sighs]
[knock on door]
[door opens]
What the hell are you doing?!
Ta-da!
-What happened to your face?
-K-Krystal...
you are steward to one
of the greatest downline
distribution businesses
I have ever seen in my life.
Your downline looks up
to you, and you have...
you have what it takes
to be a millionaire.
I know you do.
Now, this is not usually
done in the Garbeau System,
but I am here with
a special upline advance.
I know you're hard up
at the moment, and this
should show you just
how valuable you are
to your Founders family,
my business, and me,
your upline.
-This is your money?
-Yes.
Yes, this is my money.
I have so much faith in what
you can do in FAM, Krystal.
Soon, you'll be able to
write checks this big,
no problem.
-Make it twice as big.
-[laughs]
No, these are
the biggest they had.
Oh, well, I mean, this...
I did the math,
and this is the right amount
for maintaining
your downline, so...
Give me double,
and I'll grow it.
You'd recruit?
I can recruit.
Wow!
[laughing]
Great.
Great.
[door opens]
I'd tell him,
"Travis, you're hunky,
but you're not that hunky.
-Flush the dang commode."
-[laughter]
Golly.
I tell you what,
it feels so good
-to hear you talk about him.
-Thank you.
Yeah, I mean,
Travis is gone.
And you're right, it helps
to say it out loud.
But his dreams aren't.
[Destinee fussing]
He was building
something great.
That Founders business?
I always thought
it was a fantasy,
but now, without it,
I'd be a goner.
Well, Travis always was
a bit of a dreamer.
But you were always
the strong one,
and he really needed you.
Yeah, well, I'm tired
of needing to be strong.
-[Ernie] Hmm.
-I want to be happy.
And that's what Travis
wanted, too.
What would y'all ask for
if you could have anything?
-[Ernie] Hmm.
-Ernie?
Let's see, uh...
Everybody that was sick would--
Ugh, boo!
-What?
-I'm talking stuff, Ernie.
-Live a little.
-[laughter]
I want a keytar.
-What?
-[Bets] You do?
I didn't know that.
I guess I always wanted
a peacock.
[chuckles]
Ernie?
Well, let me think.
Uh...
I guess I want a keytar
and...
a peacock for my darlings.
-Oh, gosh, you're bad at this.
-[others chuckling]
I want a new wardrobe.
I'm tired of the same
three outfits.
-I want a Game Boy.
-[Bets] A Game Boy?
Well, if you're getting
a Game Boy,
then I say I want
something different,
like, um,
like maybe you and me
take some dance lessons
or something fun like that.
-[Ernie] Ooh.
-Together.
Wouldn't that be great?
[Krystal]
Ernie?
You know, I have everything
a man could need to be happy.
Mm, so sweet it makes
my teeth hurt.
-[Bets chuckles]
-You stop it.
I want a makeover.
-[Ernie] Hmm.
-[Bets] Oh, you deserve one.
You do.
Yeah, well.
[chuckles]
Ernie, you still got
that Garbeau System tape
Travis gave you?
I think I have it in my car.
-I haven't listened to it yet.
-Oh, that's fine.
I was wondering
if I could have it back.
I've been listening to them,
and it's really been helping me
deal with all this stuff.
Oh, good.
Yeah, I can get it to you.
You know, hold on to it.
I'll grab it from you at work.
Okay.
♪ Emmylou Harris'
"Till I Gain Control Again" ♪
♪ Just like the sun ♪
-♪ Over the mountaintops ♪
-[Destinee fussing]
♪ You know I'll always ♪
♪ Come again... ♪
All yours, Neenee.
♪ You know I love to spend ♪
♪ My morning ♪
♪ Times ♪
♪ Like sunlight dancing ♪
♪ On your skin... ♪
-[coos]
-[Krystal gasps]
Let's get Mommy paid.
-♪ I've never gone so wrong ♪
-Come on.
♪ As telling lies ♪
♪ To you ♪
♪ What you've seen ♪
-♪ Is what I've been... ♪
-[line ringing]
[Cody on machine]
You've got Bonar.
[beep]
You know that advance
we talked about?
I'll have Ernie
signed up in a week,
but I need that money. Now.
Good night, boss.
Hey, Dad.
Yes, sir?
I don't need a Game Boy.
♪ gentle, mysterious music ♪
♪♪♪
More gloomy-zoomies?
[quietly]
Okay.
Just rinse off after.
I love you.
Love you, too.
[phone line ringing]
Yeah, give me the game warden.
Thanks, Gayle.
Pete Heckley.
[chuckles]
How you doing?
Hey, listen, uh,
I got a question for you.
Hey, what's the, uh, fine
for gator poaching?
Really?
Ten thou?
Uh, is that per gator?
My, my, my, that's steep.
Well, uh, I got a tip for you.
Well, there's a woman
who's got some gators...
[Obie]
There is no business
like FAM distribution.
None on Earth.
You can spend money
on fancy schools,
but it's not gonna make
your kids any smarter
unless you teach them the value
of a true education.
A Founders education.
You can leech off
of somebody else's work.
In the end...
[on tape]
...you'll just be jealous
of an independent entrepreneur.
Independence is freedom.
That is why you are here.
You're sick and tired...
["Everything's Alright"
by Yvonne Elliman playing]
♪ Try not to get worried,
try not to turn on to ♪
♪ Problems that upset you, oh ♪
♪ Don't you know ♪
♪ Everything's all right, yes ♪
♪ Everything's fine ♪
♪ And we want you
to sleep well tonight ♪
♪ Let the world turn
without you tonight ♪
♪ If we try, we'll get by ♪
♪ So forget all about us ♪
-♪ Tonight ♪
-♪ Everything's all right ♪
♪ Yes, everything's
all right, yes ♪
♪ Sleep
and I shall soothe you ♪
-♪ Calm you and anoint you ♪
-[exhales sharply]
♪ Myrrh for your hot forehead ♪
♪ Then you'll feel
everything's all right, yes ♪
♪ Everything's fine ♪
♪ And it's cool
and the ointment's sweet ♪
♪ For the fire
in your head and feet ♪
♪ Close your eyes,
close your eyes ♪
♪ And relax,
think of nothing tonight ♪
♪ Everything's all right, yes ♪
♪ Everything's all right ♪
♪ Hey, woman,
your fine ointment ♪
♪ Brand-new and expensive ♪
♪ Should have been saved
for the poor ♪
♪ Why has it been wasted? ♪
♪ We could have raised maybe ♪
♪ 300 silver pieces or more ♪
♪ People who are hungry,
people who are starving ♪
♪ They matter more than your ♪
♪ Feet and ♪
♪ Hair ♪
♪ Try not to get worried,
try not to turn on to ♪
♪ Problems that upset you ♪
-♪ Don't you know ♪
-[whimpering]
♪ Everything's all right, yes,
everything's all right, yes ♪
-♪ Surely you're not saying
we have the resources ♪
-[groans]
♪ To save the poor
from their lot ♪
♪ There will be poor always ♪
♪ Pathetically struggling ♪
♪ Look at the good things
you've got ♪
[sighs]
♪ Think while you
still have me ♪
♪ Move while you still see me ♪
♪ You'll be lost ♪
♪ And you'll be sorry ♪
♪ When I'm gone ♪
-♪ Sleep and I shall
soothe you ♪
-[yells]
[distant]
♪ Calm you and anoint you ♪
♪ Myrrh for your hot ♪
[louder]
♪ Forehead ♪
♪ Then you'll feel everything's
all right, yes ♪
-♪ Everything's fine ♪
-[sobbing]
♪ And it's cool
and the ointment's sweet ♪
-[shouting]
-♪ For the fire in your head ♪
♪ And feet ♪
♪ Close your eyes,
close your eyes and relax ♪
♪ Think of nothing tonight ♪
♪ Close your eyes,
close your eyes and relax ♪
-♪ Everything's all right,
yes ♪
-♪ Close your eyes ♪
-♪ Close your eyes and relax ♪
-♪ Everything's all right,
yes ♪
♪ Close your eyes,
close your eyes and relax ♪
♪ Close your eyes, close
your eyes and relax ♪
♪ Close your eyes,
close your eyes ♪
-[knocking on door]
-♪ And relax ♪
♪ Close your eyes,
close your eyes ♪
[knocking on door]
♪♪
Hello!
Who's fired up?!
If you only trust me,
I will make your dream
come true.
Krystal,
trust the Garbeau System.
[Cody] The most beautiful thing
about your business
is that you share it, together.
[Travis]
Cody gets it, honey.
If you leave CAI,
I will leave you.
Whoa!
[Cody]
Travis!
[screaming]
[Krystal] No, what I'm saying is
that my husband was on the job
when it happened.
[woman] Ma'am, your husband
was not an employee
of Founders American
Merchandise.
He was an independent
business owner.
We need to be strong
for Krystal, you know.
I can do that.
[Krystal] I have a child.
I need health insurance.
I need the mortgage
paid on time.
I need you to make this right.
-[sighs]
-I have nothing.
[Obie] I understand
that you are emotional,
but my system did not
kill your husband.
[gunshots]
An alligator did.
[screaming]
[cooing]
♪ "Angel of the Morning"
by Juice Newton ♪
♪♪♪
[dripping]
♪ There'll be no strings
to bind your hands ♪
♪ Not if my love
can bind your heart ♪
[panting]
♪ There's no need
to take a stand ♪
♪ For it was I ♪
♪ Who chose to start ♪
[grunts]
♪ I see no need ♪
-♪ To take me home... ♪
-[grunts]
[exhales]
[quietly]
Crap.
♪ ...the dawn ♪
♪ Just call me angel
of the morning ♪
♪ Angel ♪
♪ Just touch my cheek
before you leave me, baby... ♪
[Cody] Let me just interrupt you
for one second, Brenden.
To be honest, I didn't peg you
for a wham-and-scram guy.
You know? I mean,
leaving a business
just as it's about
to take off, it's...
it-it's dumb, Brenden.
It's super dumb. I'm... I...
No. No, no, no, no, no.
No, no.
I'm not calling you dumb.
I'm just saying
that you do dumb--
-[click, dial tone]
-Hello?
Brenden?
Hello?
[phone beeping]
-[exhales]
-[beep]
[grunting]
[panting]
♪ intriguing,
atmospheric music ♪
[Obie]
I know that J-O-B is a prison.
It's a prison
of your own election,
but it's still a prison.
After I dropped out of school,
as it happens,
I was a guard for
the Zephyrhills Road Prison.
I think about those long
August days at the prison.
I was overseeing the road crew
with my billy club,
making sure those animals
kept their heads down
and their tools swinging.
It was brutal work.
I was on my feet all day,
walking the line, sweating.
[on tape]
"But, Mr. Garbeau,
didn't you learn a lot
about hard work?"
[chuckles]
Yeah, sure.
I learned how
to grind myself into dust.
I learned how to kiss butts.
I learned how to be a sucker.
♪♪♪
[squeaking]
[exhales]
Goddamn it.
[Destinee cooing over monitor]
[sighs]
[Cody]
Hiya.
Brought you something.
[sighs]
Oh, God.
[exhales]
What, uh...
What's shakin'?
What do you want?
I want to talk about
Travis's business,
in light of the tragedy.
Are those...?
As you know,
Travis was a legendary
recruiter, in terms of his...
[chuckles] his attitude
and his-his commitment and...
Those will be big shoes
to fill, Krystal.
Well, the business belonged
to the both of you,
so it's, uh...
it's yours now. And I-I
understand that you've had
-some challenges--
-What do you want, Cody?
Travis's downline.
Why is it that...
I've been buying Happy Meals
with pennies, but...
[scoffs] you always seem
to be doing just fine?
That's just how
the Garbeau System works.
It takes commitment...
How many nights a week
do you spend recruiting, Cody?
[quietly]
Um...
Leave the cookie.
♪ up-tempo, dramatic music ♪
♪♪♪
♪♪♪
[alarm beeping]
[alarm stops]
[groans]
Good morning, dumpling.
[Bets]
Morning.
[yawns]
[Bets inhales]
What you doing?
[inhales]
You know what?
-Huh?
-[sniffs]
[laughing]
What are you doing?
Your armpits smell
different from each other.
What?
Yeah.
Larry smells all musty,
but Ralph doesn't smell like
anything at all.
What?
[Bets sniffs, giggles]
Huh. Ain't that something.
-Hey, Ernie?
-Hmm?
What, pickle?
Are we going to talk
about why you came home
after midnight
smelling like chlorine?
I'm sorry.
You know, it just...
it just helps.
I know, soggy britches.
I'm just worried
about you is all.
Well, you and my pillowcases.
[chuckles]
♪ quiet, ominous music ♪
♪♪♪
[Stan]
The happiest place on Earth.
The happiest place on Earth.
[scoffs]
Where does that leave
Rebel Rapids, huh?
I don't know, Stan.
Not why I'm here.
[muttering]
Shit.
[sighs]
I need cash.
Can't.
Jesus, Stan.
Oh, you think you're the
only one with problems?
We're at war here, Miss Stubbs.
And the mouse has got the money.
Now's not the time
for frivolous spending.
Frivolous?
I had to walk here
because my car's
at the bottom of a swamp.
I need a raise,
an advance, something.
You didn't walk here today.
Yeah, I saw you.
Ernie gave you a ride.
An alligator ate my husband.
Look, you're asking
for a precedent
that I can't afford to set.
But...
[clears throat]
Water-obics needs
a new instructor.
Yeah, Brenda's got
another UTI.
The woman simply won't
change out of her swimsuit.
It's pathological.
Well, do I get a raise
if I do Water-obics?
All right, it pays
ten dollars a week.
And I've been offering
Brenda two dollars a head
to goose attendance.
Wait, what?
I've seen that class.
That's, like,
16 bucks a week, tops.
Think of it as 64 a month.
Ugh, God.
Eat my shorts, Stan.
[man speaking indistinctly
over radio]
[Cody]
You are a powerful individual.
You clearly have
exceptional social skills,
and I think
you can market those.
I only offer this opportunity
to folks I know have
what it takes to succeed
in the world of business.
Sir, if you are not with
this party, you need to leave.
You already blew
your chance, Helena.
Don't blow theirs, please.
It's okay.
We were just leaving.
-[Helena] No.
-No, no, no, no, no.
You're-you're making a mistake.
This...
[door closes]
[sighs]
I see you also
like business.
You got to do
whatever you can
to stay ahead
in this economy.
Oh, no kidding.
Tough on working folks.
You seem like
the type of guy
who stays on top
of things.
-Informed.
-Well...
you got to be in my industry.
And you also
have to be perceptive,
which... you clearly are.
I hear you.
Your boss must be
very happy with your work.
Oh. [chuckles]
Happier than you can imagine.
Because I am my own boss.
"Cody Boner,
-Boner Enterprises."
-It's Bonar.
-Good to meet you.
-Pat Stanley.
-Your own business, huh?
-Yes.
Taxes must be killer.
Well, actually, in my industry,
-everything is a tax write-off.
-Same here.
Would you believe
that a bona fide
billionaire is my mentor?
[scoffs]
A fellow Founders man.
[laughs]
Though I walk a different path.
Oh.
Oh.
-Buck Bridges.
-Yep.
Are you from California?
Just passing through.
Business.
Well, while
you're in Florida,
you should be representing
Founders Southeast.
Obie Garbeau II
revolutionized distribution
in Florida, and actually...
actually,
I would be happy
to incorporate you
into my downline.
Sir, you won't find a better
mentor for the Garbeau System.
In only three years, I've--
-Uh, believe me, Mr. Boner--
-Bonar.
Apologies.
Um, I want to be clear.
I'm not looking
for a new system.
Well...
-the thing is, Pete, that--
-Pat.
Pat.
The Garbeau System
is about community.
And you can't build a community
when out-of-towners show up
and muddy the waters.
Garbeau can't handle
a little mud?
[chuckles]
Tread lightly, friend.
Wait a minute.
Were you trying
to recruit those people?
Seemed pretty comfortable
taking no for an answer, Boner.
But if you ever want
to elevate your game...
beep me.
I was just going
to offer you those beans.
Missed me.
[sighs]
[man] Zuber's Tubers is
the potato specialty store...
[laughing lightly]
-Hi.
-Hi.
[Buzz] So, what kind
of game you after?
Hog?
Well, you can get
five or six hogs
on the back
of this guy, easy.
Been thinking
about going bigger,
but the permit fees
are out of control.
I did a mission trip to Belize
with Pete Heckley
over at Fish and Game.
I can get you a permit.
Y'all hear about that
gator attack last week?
I went to high school
with that fella.
Yeah, Travis Stubbs.
Took the Tornadoes
all the way in '75.
Heard that gator chomped him
in half like a gingerbread man.
Married a real
piece of ass, though.
Oh, yeah.
I'd chomp her in half.
Hey, bite your tongue.
That's a Miss Zuber
you're talking about.
Okay, okay.
Miss 1982.
Best talent
the pageant ever saw.
That poor thing.
Brittni, look at me.
When life hits one of my
girls, damn it, I hit back.
Customer.
Oh.
Welcome to Buzz's Motorsports.
[Krystal]
Really nice scent. It's lavender
with just a hint of rose hip.
Give you three bucks for this.
That jersey belonged
to a state champ.
-Give me a real offer.
-[groans]
But who would need
this much lotion?
Oh. Try some. You'll get hooked.
-Ten bucks.
-Actually, that's not for sale.
But...
[scoffs]
Ernie, what are you doing here?
Just shopping.
[chuckles]
Hey, Carol.
Hey! Hey, excuse me.
Hi, sugar.
Is this your house?
Yeah. And that's my pool
you're draining.
Oh, okay, great.
So, uh, can I talk
to a Travis Stubbs?
Hey, what are these?
Candlesticks.
What do they look like?
I'll give you both for 200.
Final offer.
And, no, Travis was eaten
by a gator.
Oh, my Lord, well,
I'm so sorry to hear that.
Well, I'm from Sunshine Repo,
and, um, your husband--
rest his soul--
he has a few things
that technically belong
to the bank, like that pool.
Oh, for shit sakes.
Well, if they need money,
I need to sell this stuff.
And I can't sell this stuff if
you're taking all my shit away.
Honey, honey, say no more.
I don't care
if it's not for sale!
Everything has its price.
$800 for that fine
swimming pool.
[whispers]
Okay, say "sold."
Sold!
[whispering] I'm-I'm gonna
need in your house.
[whispering] Do you have
to do this right now?
Yeah. I'm so sorry, hon.
[sniffles]
[sighs]
It's, uh, not name brand,
but it's the same stuff.
-Okay.
-[Rhonda] Oh! Hard to believe
all these great deals
we're getting, eh, Marvin?
-Hey.
-Hey.
Ernie,
that's all Travis's stuff.
How much for all of it?
Um...
50?
Would you take a hundred?
What?
All right.
-Here you go.
-Ernie...
you don't have to do that.
[laughs] You drive
a hard bargain, lady.
[tires screeching, horn honking]
Nope. No, no, no, no,
no, no, no, no, no. Krystal,
these things, they belong
to your downline.
-They're not to sell.
-Hey.
Okay, listen, I need you to put
all the Founders merchandise
back in your garage.
What you're doing is theft.
Did Carol tattle on me?
Doesn't matter. We get the FAM
things off the lawn pronto.
Hey. They were in my house,
they're taking up my space,
I'm selling 'em.
[whispers]
Yes, well, they're already sold.
Huh? To your downline.
Listen, I don't mean
to be Mr. Discipline here,
but Travis's business
follows a system.
Mm-hmm.
That system can still
make you rich,
but you have to follow it.
Right? You know this.
You've done this for two years.
Yeah. And the rules
always change,
so how about this system?
I give people things,
they pay me.
You are the pope of nope today.
Look at the big picture.
The volume of product
that Travis's...
that your downline buys
determines your FP,
which determines
your bonus tier.
Travis was on the verge
of jumping a tier,
giving him colossal
bonus checks.
Now, your downline
is gonna be here Thursday,
and if you've sold their
product, I mean, Krystal--
Um, okay. Sorry. Ma'am?
-Excuse me, ma'am. Sorry.
-What?
We got to have
a little talk
about the railroad tracks.
See, I'm supposed to take you
to the orthodontist
to get them removed.
Otherwise, you can't get
'em cleaned, and, well,
-we both know that ain't pretty.
-[crying]
Honey, I'm so sorry.
Do you need someone
to talk to?
If I get these things off,
it's on my terms.
Okay. Okay.
How much do I owe?
[gasps]
[sighs]
Oh, fuck.
Cody!
Listen, if I give you 600
for what you owe on the braces,
will you put the FAM goods
back in your garage
and distribute by the system?
One more time.
That's it.
[sighs]
[phone ringing]
[pan sizzling]
[Krystal]
Stubbs residence.
Leave one after the beep.
[machine beeps]
[Buzz]
Krystal? Uh, it's Buzz.
I heard about what happened
to your husband,
and I haven't been able
to stop thinking...
Well, listen,
on behalf of all of us
at the Miss Zuber pageant,
if there's anything
we can do to help,
I mean, we'd do anything
for you.
Buzz?
[engine whirring]
♪ up-tempo, optimistic music ♪
♪♪♪
[grunts]
How long till Destinee digs up
Mr. Travis's time capsule?
You know, I guess
that'll be up to Miss Krystal.
It makes me sad.
Well, it's a good thing
we're here.
'Cause it's hard to be sad
when you're doing something good
for somebody else.
♪ I've been workin'
on the railroad ♪
♪ All the live-long day ♪
[both] ♪ I've been workin'
on the railroad ♪
♪ Just to pass the time away ♪
[laughs]
[Krystal] This is to get
my water turned back on.
[Sandra] Okay. Uh,
just give me a moment
while I pull up
your account.
Oh, there you are,
Mrs. Stubbs.
And utilities...
Oh.
What's wrong?
Um, well, it looks like one
of your mortgages is past due.
-Wait, what? "One of"?
-Mm-hmm.
The second's been
delinquent since November.
We sent foreclosure notices
on November 7, 21,
December 3.
You have a balance
of $4,987
and 86 cents.
Would you like to pay that now?
Uh... how long do I have?
Um, you have to clear
the balance a week from Monday.
Otherwise, they're gonna put
a lock on your house.
-And you know how difficult--
-I know how it works. Thanks.
Mrs. Stubbs, I am so sorry
to be the bearer of bad news.
-But if... No.
-♪ Happy birthday to you ♪
-♪ Happy birthday to you ♪
-No! [laughs]
It's my birthday.
-♪ Happy birthday,
dear Sandra ♪
-Oh, my God.
♪ Happy birthday to you ♪
[indistinct chatter]
[laughter, applause]
[sighs]
[cooing]
[Buzz] Yeah, well, a boy
his age ought to start
getting comfortable
with a motorbike.
But you really
want to make sure
any kid who rides
wears a helmet.
It's a hell
of a lot of motor for...
-[whoops]
-[tires screech]
Good gravy.
I never sat on so much power.
It's like riding
a charging buffalo.
Have you ever tried
one of these?
Oh. I'm here for my son.
Well, you should try
being here for you.
Miss Zuber is forever, Krystal.
I won't leave you hurting here,
but you're not right for sales.
I just sold that lady an ATV,
and I don't even work here.
I ought to be asking
for commission.
It's not just about closing.
It's the haggle.
The money's in
the margins.
I don't just hire
salesmen who close.
I hire salesmen who close right.
Well, what the hell
does that mean?
Let me run something else
by you, Krystal.
My daughter Becca, she's
prepping for Miss Teen Zuber.
Now, I have to
recuse myself
as a judge, of course.
She's gonna need a proper coach.
Mm-hmm. Okay.
Connie Prumpton
offered to do it.
Well, Connie won Miss Zuber '84
'cause of her cans.
Can't coach Becca
to have big cans.
You still got
a way with words.
Anyway, Becca,
she's beautiful,
but she's a little spooky.
She's gonna need
to lean on her talent.
You know I owned
that talent portion.
Forever and always.
Are you still able
to do your, um...
[sighs] I don't remember
what you called it. The, uh...
dance with the things?
Never called it anything
in particular.
I'll show her myself.
[Ernie grunting]
[Bets] Well, how's it
going out there, Harold?
[grunts quietly]
Was Travis Dad's best friend?
No, honey.
Why is Dad doing this?
Well, doing something nice
for your neighbors
makes your dad feel good.
Well, why does Dad feel bad?
See, right now
Miss Krystal doesn't have
the time to feel sad,
so your dad is
being sad for her.
But he's
like this a lot.
[sighs]
Hey, Miss Destinee,
are you ready for your mama
to come get you?
It's you and me.
My sympathies,
Krystal.
[gasps] Glenna!
Oh, my God, deviled eggs.
Oh, you're so sweet.
Here, your order's right here.
Do you need help?
Uh, you can help Glenna
with her stuff.
Oh, Glenna's fine.
[Carol]
Oh, Krystal,
I'm just checking. Have you
been pressing hard enough
for the triplicates?
-Yes, Carol.
-Hmm.
-Bitch.
-[Cody] Don't.
Carol is your-- and my-- upline.
I agreed to distribute
to Travis's downline,
-not kiss Carol's ass.
-It wasn't my idea
to bring her here, okay?
The Wilkeses think you're
considering leaving FAM.
[scoffs]
I'm not considering anything.
All right, let's go
over your order quick.
[Destinee fussing]
Facial tissues,
-bandages, large...
-Hello...
[Krystal]
Powder compact, shampoo.
Cody, you can't afford
any more pop-n-drops.
Now, if you're
facing challenges
keeping Krystal engaged,
tell me. I'm here to help.
Oh, she's just
in a bad mood, Carol.
You know, it's probably
that time of the month.
I beg your pardon?
No, I just meant,
I meant, um, medically.
[sighs] Obie did
an entire seminar
on wavering downline.
I have the tape.
I think you need it.
Oh, I know
every single word
Obie's ever written
or said, I--
[Krystal]
I'm done.
Find someone else
to do this crap.
[chuckles]
Fix it.
Yes.
♪ lighthearted music ♪
[Krsytal humming]
♪♪♪
[exhales]
[pounding on door]
[Rhonda]
Knock, knock!
-Yeah?
-It's Rhonda!
The-the repo lady.
Oh. Come in.
-Door's broken.
-Okay.
I-I don't know what's left
for you to take.
Oh, no, I'm not here
on business.
Look, I-I was just thinking
about how much fun I had
pretending to buy stuff.
I don't repo cases
of $100 Scotch often.
My way of offering sympathies.
It's not a good time.
Hey!
Don't touch that.
Look, I don't meet a lot
of folk during good times.
I do meet folk when they
need a shoulder to cry on.
Yeah. Well, I'll tell you,
worst thing about him dying
is that now I can't divorce him,
so that's where I am
in terms of needing
-shoulders and such.
-Mm.
[Destinee fussing
over monitor]
I got to check on my baby,
but, um...
what the heck, come on in.
I'll grab us some mixers.
Uh, is there a body in there?
Oh, it's for a job.
I'll tell you all about it.
-Okay.
-[Cody] I get it.
She's having a tough go of
things, but she's... [sighs]
she's perfect
for the job.
I mean, the downline
practically worships her,
-you know?
-And I'm sure the widow thing
-doesn't hurt.
-No.
Not at all, Pat,
not at all.
They'd go to the ends
of the earth for her
if she asked them to.
-She ain't asking, huh?
-No.
She and Travis were barely
Bronze Jeffersons, so...
The bonuses just aren't enough
to keep her in the game.
[sighs] Okay, so I'm glad
you beeped me,
because you're right,
Mr. Bridges does have something
-to say on the matter.
-Yeah.
Yeah.
Well, a great navigator
knows when to change course.
Hit us again,
barkeep, will you?
[bell dings]
Most girls don't think
about light.
They figure, "That's for the
stage manager to worry about.
I'll just do my thing."
They're dummies.
-[chuckles]
-That's the first,
biggest
thing you need to learn:
your job isn't
to perform a talent.
It's to dazzle,
by any means necessary.
So if you want better lighting
than the other girls,
give yourself better lighting
than the other girls.
Any questions, Buzz?
Did, uh... did Travis hunt?
Nope. Have a seat.
[slurping]
Okay.
So let me ask you a question:
how's your business doing?
[chuckles] Only problem is I
might be making too much money.
Cheers to that,
brother!
I'm putting mine
in stocks and bonds.
[chuckling]
Oh, life is good.
It's good to be a successful
businessman, so take advantage.
Give her an upline bonus.
An upline bonus.
It's the same as a FAM bonus,
only it comes directly
from the upline. It's not part
of the Garbeau System?
It's your downline, Pat.
They're independent.
They're not your employee.
I mean, their money comes
from their business,
all right, not yours.
Is that what
Garbeau says?
Because Bridges would
tell you to use the value
of your business to show
this widow her value.
No wonder you're
making a change.
[laughing]
Oh, I am not making
a change, Pat.
This is Garbeau
country,
and I'm a Garbeau man.
I played you like a bassoon.
[slurping]
[stammers]
But you said that...
It's just business, Pat.
Just business.
[chuckles]
You're a sharp guy, Bonar.
If you won't
admit it to me,
admit it to yourself,
Obie Garbeau let you down.
Obie Garbeau II.
Excuse me.
If, uh, you wind up
keeping this widow,
address your
thank-you card to...
Buck Bridges I.
[slurping]
[cup clatters]
[clears throat]
I'm sorry! I'm sorry!
[both grunting]
[Heart's "Straight On"
playing]
♪ Quite some time ♪
♪ I've been sitting it out ♪
♪ Didn't take no chances ♪
♪ I was a prisoner of doubt ♪
♪ I knocked down
the wailing wall ♪
♪ Ain't no sin ♪
♪ Got the feel of fortune ♪
♪ Deal me in ♪
♪ Coming straight on for you ♪
♪ You made my mind ♪
♪ Now I'm stronger,
now I'm coming through ♪
♪ Straight on ♪
♪ Straight on for you ♪
♪ Straight on for you ♪
♪ Ooh ♪
♪ Ooh ♪
♪ Ooh, yeah, for you ♪
[music stops]
[exhales]
Okay.
The puppets do
most of the work,
and the dance is simple enough.
It's a confidence thing.
What'd you think?
[chuckles quietly]
We got to get you
talking, girl.
You haven't lost a step.
Yeah, well...
Miss Teen Zuber's in six months.
I can do three times
a week, 90 minutes,
50 bucks a session. That's
competitive with the market.
If she's not Miss Teen Zuber
come July,
I will refund you half.
Oh, and... my only request
is that you pay up front.
My money's tied up,
and I need cash. It's 4,000.
Now, Krystal,
I know when I'm being
taken for a ride.
It's competitive
with the market.
Well, not the market
I've been shopping in.
Connie was gonna do it
for 20 a session,
and not up front,
get paid as you go.
Well, Buzz, this is
a special skill.
I could do 3,500--
two grand now
and the rest weekly.
I want to help you,
but I'm not here as a charity.
Dad.
Okay, the offer is 20 a session.
2,000 total,
and I need it up front.
I can't budge on that.
Okay.
Can't do 20 a session?
How about 15?
Um...
Buzz, please, I need the cash.
I'm, like, one bad day
from losing my house.
This is what I mean when I talk
about haggling, Becca.
That's called
"surrendering your leverage."
"Leverage"?
Is that what you called it
when you were trading
tiaras for tug jobs?
Ew!
Becca, go wait in the car.
Why don't you go wait
in the car, too, Buzz?
I have been nothing
but nice to you.
Hey, you don't
fucking touch me.
Goodness gracious, woman.
I don't need to touch you.
I want my ATV back, too.
-Yeah, no shit!
-[screwdriver clatters]
[door opens and closes]
[exhales]
♪ slow, somber music ♪
[Destinee crying over monitor]
[sighs]
[sighs]
[knock on door]
[door opens]
What the hell are you doing?!
Ta-da!
-What happened to your face?
-K-Krystal...
you are steward to one
of the greatest downline
distribution businesses
I have ever seen in my life.
Your downline looks up
to you, and you have...
you have what it takes
to be a millionaire.
I know you do.
Now, this is not usually
done in the Garbeau System,
but I am here with
a special upline advance.
I know you're hard up
at the moment, and this
should show you just
how valuable you are
to your Founders family,
my business, and me,
your upline.
-This is your money?
-Yes.
Yes, this is my money.
I have so much faith in what
you can do in FAM, Krystal.
Soon, you'll be able to
write checks this big,
no problem.
-Make it twice as big.
-[laughs]
No, these are
the biggest they had.
Oh, well, I mean, this...
I did the math,
and this is the right amount
for maintaining
your downline, so...
Give me double,
and I'll grow it.
You'd recruit?
I can recruit.
Wow!
[laughing]
Great.
Great.
[door opens]
I'd tell him,
"Travis, you're hunky,
but you're not that hunky.
-Flush the dang commode."
-[laughter]
Golly.
I tell you what,
it feels so good
-to hear you talk about him.
-Thank you.
Yeah, I mean,
Travis is gone.
And you're right, it helps
to say it out loud.
But his dreams aren't.
[Destinee fussing]
He was building
something great.
That Founders business?
I always thought
it was a fantasy,
but now, without it,
I'd be a goner.
Well, Travis always was
a bit of a dreamer.
But you were always
the strong one,
and he really needed you.
Yeah, well, I'm tired
of needing to be strong.
-[Ernie] Hmm.
-I want to be happy.
And that's what Travis
wanted, too.
What would y'all ask for
if you could have anything?
-[Ernie] Hmm.
-Ernie?
Let's see, uh...
Everybody that was sick would--
Ugh, boo!
-What?
-I'm talking stuff, Ernie.
-Live a little.
-[laughter]
I want a keytar.
-What?
-[Bets] You do?
I didn't know that.
I guess I always wanted
a peacock.
[chuckles]
Ernie?
Well, let me think.
Uh...
I guess I want a keytar
and...
a peacock for my darlings.
-Oh, gosh, you're bad at this.
-[others chuckling]
I want a new wardrobe.
I'm tired of the same
three outfits.
-I want a Game Boy.
-[Bets] A Game Boy?
Well, if you're getting
a Game Boy,
then I say I want
something different,
like, um,
like maybe you and me
take some dance lessons
or something fun like that.
-[Ernie] Ooh.
-Together.
Wouldn't that be great?
[Krystal]
Ernie?
You know, I have everything
a man could need to be happy.
Mm, so sweet it makes
my teeth hurt.
-[Bets chuckles]
-You stop it.
I want a makeover.
-[Ernie] Hmm.
-[Bets] Oh, you deserve one.
You do.
Yeah, well.
[chuckles]
Ernie, you still got
that Garbeau System tape
Travis gave you?
I think I have it in my car.
-I haven't listened to it yet.
-Oh, that's fine.
I was wondering
if I could have it back.
I've been listening to them,
and it's really been helping me
deal with all this stuff.
Oh, good.
Yeah, I can get it to you.
You know, hold on to it.
I'll grab it from you at work.
Okay.
♪ Emmylou Harris'
"Till I Gain Control Again" ♪
♪ Just like the sun ♪
-♪ Over the mountaintops ♪
-[Destinee fussing]
♪ You know I'll always ♪
♪ Come again... ♪
All yours, Neenee.
♪ You know I love to spend ♪
♪ My morning ♪
♪ Times ♪
♪ Like sunlight dancing ♪
♪ On your skin... ♪
-[coos]
-[Krystal gasps]
Let's get Mommy paid.
-♪ I've never gone so wrong ♪
-Come on.
♪ As telling lies ♪
♪ To you ♪
♪ What you've seen ♪
-♪ Is what I've been... ♪
-[line ringing]
[Cody on machine]
You've got Bonar.
[beep]
You know that advance
we talked about?
I'll have Ernie
signed up in a week,
but I need that money. Now.
Good night, boss.
Hey, Dad.
Yes, sir?
I don't need a Game Boy.
♪ gentle, mysterious music ♪
♪♪♪
More gloomy-zoomies?
[quietly]
Okay.
Just rinse off after.
I love you.
Love you, too.
[phone line ringing]
Yeah, give me the game warden.
Thanks, Gayle.
Pete Heckley.
[chuckles]
How you doing?
Hey, listen, uh,
I got a question for you.
Hey, what's the, uh, fine
for gator poaching?
Really?
Ten thou?
Uh, is that per gator?
My, my, my, that's steep.
Well, uh, I got a tip for you.
Well, there's a woman
who's got some gators...
[Obie]
There is no business
like FAM distribution.
None on Earth.
You can spend money
on fancy schools,
but it's not gonna make
your kids any smarter
unless you teach them the value
of a true education.
A Founders education.
You can leech off
of somebody else's work.
In the end...
[on tape]
...you'll just be jealous
of an independent entrepreneur.
Independence is freedom.
That is why you are here.
You're sick and tired...
["Everything's Alright"
by Yvonne Elliman playing]
♪ Try not to get worried,
try not to turn on to ♪
♪ Problems that upset you, oh ♪
♪ Don't you know ♪
♪ Everything's all right, yes ♪
♪ Everything's fine ♪
♪ And we want you
to sleep well tonight ♪
♪ Let the world turn
without you tonight ♪
♪ If we try, we'll get by ♪
♪ So forget all about us ♪
-♪ Tonight ♪
-♪ Everything's all right ♪
♪ Yes, everything's
all right, yes ♪
♪ Sleep
and I shall soothe you ♪
-♪ Calm you and anoint you ♪
-[exhales sharply]
♪ Myrrh for your hot forehead ♪
♪ Then you'll feel
everything's all right, yes ♪
♪ Everything's fine ♪
♪ And it's cool
and the ointment's sweet ♪
♪ For the fire
in your head and feet ♪
♪ Close your eyes,
close your eyes ♪
♪ And relax,
think of nothing tonight ♪
♪ Everything's all right, yes ♪
♪ Everything's all right ♪
♪ Hey, woman,
your fine ointment ♪
♪ Brand-new and expensive ♪
♪ Should have been saved
for the poor ♪
♪ Why has it been wasted? ♪
♪ We could have raised maybe ♪
♪ 300 silver pieces or more ♪
♪ People who are hungry,
people who are starving ♪
♪ They matter more than your ♪
♪ Feet and ♪
♪ Hair ♪
♪ Try not to get worried,
try not to turn on to ♪
♪ Problems that upset you ♪
-♪ Don't you know ♪
-[whimpering]
♪ Everything's all right, yes,
everything's all right, yes ♪
-♪ Surely you're not saying
we have the resources ♪
-[groans]
♪ To save the poor
from their lot ♪
♪ There will be poor always ♪
♪ Pathetically struggling ♪
♪ Look at the good things
you've got ♪
[sighs]
♪ Think while you
still have me ♪
♪ Move while you still see me ♪
♪ You'll be lost ♪
♪ And you'll be sorry ♪
♪ When I'm gone ♪
-♪ Sleep and I shall
soothe you ♪
-[yells]
[distant]
♪ Calm you and anoint you ♪
♪ Myrrh for your hot ♪
[louder]
♪ Forehead ♪
♪ Then you'll feel everything's
all right, yes ♪
-♪ Everything's fine ♪
-[sobbing]
♪ And it's cool
and the ointment's sweet ♪
-[shouting]
-♪ For the fire in your head ♪
♪ And feet ♪
♪ Close your eyes,
close your eyes and relax ♪
♪ Think of nothing tonight ♪
♪ Close your eyes,
close your eyes and relax ♪
-♪ Everything's all right,
yes ♪
-♪ Close your eyes ♪
-♪ Close your eyes and relax ♪
-♪ Everything's all right,
yes ♪
♪ Close your eyes,
close your eyes and relax ♪
♪ Close your eyes, close
your eyes and relax ♪
♪ Close your eyes,
close your eyes ♪
-[knocking on door]
-♪ And relax ♪
♪ Close your eyes,
close your eyes ♪
[knocking on door]
♪♪