New Amsterdam (2018–…): Season 5, Episode 4 - Heal Thyself - full transcript
Previously, on
"New Amsterdam"...
I can... I can't be
who I want to be
with you.
[sighs]
I think
I might have to crash here.
Yeah, sure thing, sis.
You're sober, Lauren.
You can't handle
that kind of
- temptation.
- What I can't handle is guilt, okay?
She's a mess because I left
her there with my mother.
You went from
Norman Rockwell to screaming.
Could've gone to jail.
No, we're not goin' fishing.
We're going home.
You've been pestering me
for months!
It sounds like
a textbook example
of someone
with bipolar disorder.
[dramatic music]
[♪ ♪]
[muted voice] Friends.
[whispers] Friends.
[♪ ♪]
Move, move, move,
move, move, move.
- [all scream]
- Clear a path!
Clear a path!
[♪ ♪]
Hey, you get Max's page?
You only got one?
[♪ ♪]
- What do three 911s mean?
- Can't be anything good.
Oh, excuse me,
excuse me, coming through!
- Did he page everyone?
- Yes, this must be bad.
- Make a damn hole!
- Move aside, please.
Move. Move. Move.
Max, what's wrong?
- What's the emergency?
- What is it?
Is everything okay
with the hospital?
Is it a mass casualty?
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
- Tell me Veronica's not back.
- Hold on.
Just take a seat.
All right?
Come on in.
Why don't you take a breath?
In fact, why don't we all take
a nice, deep breath with me?
Ready? In...
[all inhale]
And out.
[all exhale]
There we go.
Doesn't that feel better?
Yeah?
Okay, now that we are
nice and relaxed,
I have some bad news.
You are all
in critical condition.
What... what does that mean,
exactly?
Well, it means that morale
for doctors
is at an all-time low.
You gotta be kiddin' me, Max.
Uh, not kidding.
Burnout and turnover
are at an all-time high,
and if it continues
at this pace,
we're not gonna have enough
staff to keep the doors open.
Yeah, you made this sound
like it was a real emergency.
This is a real emergency.
Your hours are too long.
Your downtime is too short,
and you don't have
the mental space
to take care of yourselves.
And if you can't do that,
how are you gonna
take care of your patients?
- [people whispering]
- [coughing]
I got some surgeries
to attend to.
Well, actually, you don't,
because I took the liberty
of clearing
your entire schedule.
In fact, nobody in this room
has anything urgent
to do today,
because today, your one
and only patient is you.
[upbeat music]
[♪ ♪]
I hope everyone gets as excited
as Dr. Lauren Bloom here.
Yes, question.
Elizabeth?
- "No."
- Okay, not really a question,
but, uh, the answer is yes.
We are all going to prioritize
the health issues
that we have been putting off,
because we're either
too busy or too tired.
- Now say it with me.
- Please don't.
We can do it.
Ready?
Doctors, heal thyself!
Oh, God.
[all muttering]
[laughs] Ooh.
[♪ ♪]
Ooh, I think
the New Amsterdam newsletter
has found its centerfold.
Pretty sure you're not
allowed to say stuff
- like that anymore.
- Yeah.
Let me.
[monitor beeping]
This latest Max plan is such
a ridiculous waste of time.
Suck it up.
I just got my first
mammogram in three years.
It had been weighing
on my mind,
but I had no time
to do anything about it.
- And?
- I'm in perfect health,
and you'll be too.
What?
If this is a bit,
it's not funny.
You... you have a short
PR interval and a delta wave
at onset of the QRS complex.
Are you suggesting
pre-excitation syndrome?
No, I am saying it flat-out.
You have
Wolf-Parkinson-White Syndrome.
I'm fitting you in for
a catheter ablation at 4:00.
[sighs]
Nah.
Floyd, you know the risks
of a re-entrant tachycardia.
What I do know is that
they're not as immediate
as the risk posed to my five
patients I had scheduled today.
Now, I did my part
for Max's stupid plan.
I'm gonna go tend to them.
I'll deal with this
on my next day off.
Oh, when is that?
Yeah, I'll see you at 4:00,
hot stuff.
[♪ ♪]
So it's so nice to
finally meet you
in the flesh, Ronel, you know?
Not that our emoji-ladened
chats on the app
haven't been fun.
Cowboy hat, cowboy hat,
fireworks.
[laughs]
Uh, spaceship,
pretzel, sunglasses.
You've always been so busy,
and now you're suddenly free?
- Yeah.
- Did you get fired?
[laughs] No, no...
Not that I know of, anyway.
No, no, I'm as shocked
as you are.
You know, my boss he, uh...
He insisted that all of us
take a health day...
You know, out of the blue.
Initially,
I was really resentful,
but then I realized that,
like, it had been so long
since I had actual
human-to-human contact
outside of work that I thought
this was the most healthy thing
I could do.
So you wanna hit it?
What... do I wanna hit it?
Uh...
[laughs nervously]
Yeah, I mean, I'd love...
I'd love to hit it.
But you know,
I heard that this place
has a wonderful tarte Tatin
that's apparently
somethin' else.
It's nothing compared
to what I'd like to give you.
Doctor's orders, right?
[♪ ♪]
[clears throat]
'Scuse me.
Check, please.
I... so, sorry...
So, so sorry.
Okay, spoiler alert.
This one is going to be
clean as a whistle.
I mean pristine.
You seem real proud
of this sample.
Oh, I am, yeah.
You have any idea
how hard it is staying sober,
- living with my sister?
- Can't say I do.
Well, she wakes up
to tequila shots.
Yeah, her apartment
is like one big pharmacy.
Essentially,
the whole thing is, like,
one big trigger for me.
BP's good.
Now let's check your weight.
I guess I'd be lying
if I said it hadn't
tested my sobriety,
but she needs me, you know?
- Mm-hmm.
- What does it cost me, right...
To finally be there for her?
It looks like
you lost five pounds.
Oh.
Why, thank you, doctor.
You need to stop
taking your Adderall.
I'm sorry, what?
You're underweight,
and the protocol is clear.
So I can't refill
your prescription,
and you'll have to hand over
any pills you have.
So you just want me
to quit cold turkey?
I'm just following
the protocols.
Yeah, but you're not
gonna hold me to that.
You know that this
is a class of medication
that makes it harder
to maintain weight,
and yours is dangerously low.
You know,
if I don't get my meds...
you know what happens.
My hands are tied here.
I get irritable,
anxious, distracted.
- I can't focus.
- Lauren...
the bottle.
[tense music]
[♪ ♪]
I run
an emergency department.
I mean, I can't do that
if I, myself, am in a state
of emergency.
[♪ ♪]
Look, come back at the end
of the week
for another weigh-in.
If you put on the weight,
I'm happy to give you
your pills back.
[♪ ♪]
Okay.
[♪ ♪]
Just take
the rest of the week off.
I'm perfectly capable
of running the E.D.
- if you recall.
- Actually, as I recall,
- you needed me to do it.
- Wow, already,
the moodiness is upon us.
That was fast.
No, it's just
a couple of pounds.
I mean, I'm gonna have it
handled by lunchtime,
'cause I got a plan...
Right there.
See?
- All right, let's do this!
- I've never been so inspired.
- What do we got?
- Displaced patient,
32 weeks gestation
and contracting.
Uh, why didn't we send her
up to the OB?
I did.
They sent her back... no room.
Oh, the cafeteria served
the eggplant parm again?
Like clockwork.
Every time, we get flooded
- with patients in labor.
- The ergots are gonna get ya.
Hi, Aria.
I'm Dr. Bloom.
So your contractions are
what we call Braxton-Hicks.
It's actually fake labor,
but it's nothing
to stress over.
My husband's in Cleveland.
Should he fly back?
No, no.
There is no need
to disrupt his day, okay?
What you need
is rest and peace.
So I'm just gonna move you
to a quieter part of the E.D.
where you can relax, okay?
I'll be right back to check
on you in just a moment.
All right, who's got grub?
I was gonna eat that one.
With that,
ladies and gentlemen,
we coast right into aggression.
Closed for the day, good.
Closed.
Closed, excellent.
Closed. Great.
Oh, hey.
Sorry to micromanage.
I'm just, uh, goin' around,
checkin' in to see how people
are doing
with today's mandate, so...
"Me?
Oh, well, uh, you know,
"I just took a power nap.
[groans]
That was... wow.
Best five minutes of my day."
Huh, yeah, naps are good,
but I was kind of looking
for more of a designated,
real self-care day...
You know,
appointments and procedures,
that kind of thing.
Is there anything you've been
letting fall by the wayside?
- Mm-mm.
- "Nope."
Come on.
Surely there's something.
- What?
- Uh...
"Uh," what?
What?
What was that?
That was something.
That's "Him... him.
Tell... tell him."
That means, "Tell him."
I know what that means.
Tell me.
What?
He's right.
- Okay.
- "I need surgery.
But it's really
not a big deal."
Mm.
[light suspenseful music]
[♪ ♪]
Uh, but see the thing is,
surgery is kind of a big deal,
because it's surgery.
So what is it?
[whispers] I have...
"I have
carpal tunnel syndrome."
Well... well,
that's fixable, right?
"Yes, sure.
Uh, physical therapy,
"acupuncture,
icing your wrists twice a day,
"steroid shots and all that.
It did not work.
Now surgery
is the only option."
Well, uh, so you...
You get it.
- [laughs]
- "It is my hands, Max.
"Even if everything
goes perfectly,
I wouldn't be able
to use my hands for weeks."
[♪ ♪]
- Well, but you...
- Stay!
Just...
[♪ ♪]
[groans]
[door creaks]
Ignatius,
you look positively trounced,
though, not necessarily
in a bad way.
Hello, Dorian.
It's nice to see you.
You know, you would think
that being a psychiatrist,
you would know
a little more about tact...
You know,
especially after practicing
for what, 900 years now?
Ouch.
[under breath] I'm sorry.
Dorian.
Dorian, I'm sorry.
Hey, I just... it's just...
It's us.
- Psychiatrists?
- No, gay people.
- Why is our culture like this?
- I completely agree.
I say this Gaga person
is no Streisand,
and I don't care who knows.
I am talking about
our obsession with sex, Dorian.
You know on some
of these dating apps,
they don't even want
a picture of your face?
- That's awful.
- Yeah!
What did you say
the name of that one was?
Of course, gosh.
It's dehumanizing, you know?
The last time I was
in the dating pool,
which was pre-internet,
you had to talk to someone
before you just took 'em home.
Yes, that's what gay clubs
have all been famous for...
- Talking.
- Look, I'm just saying
that I was shocked
at how bad it is out there.
That's all.
In my day,
the best I could hope for
was a furtive meeting
in a park,
while keeping my fingers
crossed that no vice cops
- were watching.
- Right.
Talking wasn't exactly
at a premium then either.
But what this sounds like,
to my experienced ears,
is a guy complaining
after a bad date.
No, no, wrong, completely.
[quirky music]
Yeah, okay,
I mean, yes, I had a date.
I did have a date,
but it wasn't bad.
It wasn't bad at all.
It was just, you know, off.
He didn't want
to have sex with you.
Um, in fact, he did,
Rylance, thank you very much.
But it wasn't that.
It was his approach, you know?
It was his, um...
It was his directness.
He didn't really
wanna get to know me,
and it, uh,
it just threw off my game.
- That's all.
- You couldn't get an erection.
Oh...
Man, come on. Hey.
Yes, yes,
I couldn't get an erection.
The last thing you need is to
treat this issue with silence.
Oh, just because I don't want
my entire department
to know that I couldn't
get it up,
doesn't mean
I don't wanna deal with it.
Iggy, you just asked me
to agree with your rant
about gay culture, thus,
validating the notion
that your erectile dysfunction
is everyone else's fault.
But I won't, and it isn't.
If you're experiencing E.D.,
Iggy, that's about you.
[soft dramatic music]
[humming]
[percussive beat]
[♪ ♪]
What's going on?
I couldn't help but notice
you reassigned your surgeries
back to yourself,
so I took the liberty
of re-reassigning them
back to other surgeons.
[chuckles]
I'm the chair.
You need approval to do that.
- Yeah, she got approval.
- What the hell?
Do you remember
that little speech I gave
about three hours ago
about doctors
taking care of themselves?
That wasn't just advice.
That was actually an order that
you're apparently ignoring.
So we have decided to take
matters into our own hands,
and we're gonna take care
of that
Wolf-Parkinson-White Syndrome.
Max...
Oh, I have an opening right
now.
You're in good hands,
my friend.
I never liked you...
Either of you.
- I am fine with that.
- I think he's excited.
Yeah, I think he is.
I'm just saying five pounds
is a lot to put on in one day.
I've got science on my side.
I've got an extra-large
vegan, veggie,
double meatless chicken pie.
Need our ooey-gooey
garlic cheese dipping sauce?
Ha, more than you even know.
Uh, okay...
- What, did you skip breakfast?
- Watch it, pal.
I've got a bunch
of scalpels back there.
All right, keep the change.
Thank you.
Okay,
time to pack on the pounds.
[door slams open]
I've got a male, 30s,
complaining of stomach pains
and vomiting blood.
Or not.
- [groans]
- Right, yeah,
okay, that sounds
like a stomach ulcer.
Stomach ulcer?
No, that can't happen.
I'm supposed to work
a double tonight.
I'm afraid Red Papayas
is gonna have
to make do without you.
We need to perform an emergency
endoscopy.
Let's get him
in the procedure room.
Okay, I need two
large-bore IVs,
normal saline, wide open.
Start a propofol drip, and let's...
oh, shoot,
uh, just a sec.
Hi, Aria, how are you feeling?
- Much better, thank you.
- Oh, great, 'cause we need
to move you to a quieter part
of the hospital, okay?
- Oh.
- You're gonna love it.
Oh, okay.
All right, let's do this.
[dramatic music]
I can't see a thing.
Okay.
Irrigating...
That ulcer's
gotta be in here, somewhere.
Come out.
Come out wherever you are.
Try deeper in the antrum.
[♪ ♪]
Okay,
getting closer.
There, three o'clock.
Whoa, ulcer eroded
into the artery.
It's a real pumper.
I... I can't see anything.
BP's dropping.
You gotta zap it.
- No, Walsh, just...
- You gotta zap it now!
Those are
the exact coordinates.
- Now!
- Just zoom in.
D... on the monitor!
G... just...
Use fully
thought-out sentences!
Fully thought-out.
Switching to cautery mode.
[device beeping]
- [beeping stops]
- You got it.
[♪ ♪]
That was a close one.
[gloves snap off]
Try salty food.
You really need
to get back on your meds.
[sighs]
Oh, um, hello.
Dr. Yamadi.
"Dr. Yamadi, I'm so sorry
to keep you waiting.
Give me just a moment, please."
[percussive beat]
[♪ ♪]
[mouse clicking]
[♪ ♪]
"So tell me about your cancer.
When were you diagnosed?"
I'm fine.
I'm here to see you.
Carpal tunnel, right?
[laughs]
"A hand surgeon?"
Well, not just
any hand surgeon...
The best hand surgeon
in Manhattan just for you.
"Oh, just for me?
Oh, well, thank you,
- wonderful."
- I know that you're worried
about taking care
of your patients, all right?
But by getting this surgery,
you are taking care
of your patients.
And Yamadi is so good
that you'll be performing
surgery again in no time.
- [vocalizes]
- "You have overstepped, Max."
All right, how much pain
are you in right now?
Scale of one to ten...
- [vocalizes angrily]
- How much discomfort
in your wrists?
- "Six."
- What does that really mean?
- Eight.
- "Eight."
And today was
your clinic day,
which means no surgeries.
So how bad is it
when you operate?
[screams]
- [squeals]
- Elizabeth.
- Elizabeth.
- [squeals]
[soft dramatic music]
You can tell me
it's none of my business.
And as a friend,
you'd be right,
but I am also
the medical director.
And as a surgeon,
your hands are your gift.
- [vocalizes]
- What would you say
to a patient who was ignoring
this kind of pain?
- [vocalizes]
- "Yes, Max, my hands
are my career.
But..."
[whispers vocalization]
"They're also my way
of connecting with the world."
[♪ ♪]
"Surgery means I won't be able
to communicate for weeks."
[♪ ♪]
"No ASL,
"no writing, no texting..."
[♪ ♪]
"Not being able
to take care of myself,
and not being able to say
what I need."
[♪ ♪]
"It's not recovery.
Max, you would be
putting me in a prison."
[♪ ♪]
[sobs]
[♪ ♪]
- [elevator dings]
- Oh, wonderful news.
I have high blood pressure,
and now I'm very anxious.
Oh, uh, take an ACE inhibitor
and call Dr. Frome.
My CAT scan was inconclusive,
so I'm gonna need another day
off for a follow-up.
You got it.
What?
There's a reason
I don't pick up
my meds from the pharmacy.
They remind me I'm sick.
Why can't I live
in denial like my patients?
Guess who did what you said
and got their ADHD meds
confiscated.
- Why?
- Doesn't matter.
What does matter
is you were right.
Taking care of yourself
feels great!
Ah.
Have you been
pleasuring yourself?
[scoffs]
Uh, the correct medical
terminology nowadays
- is... is non-partnered sex.
- Of course.
Thank you.
So have you been whacking it?
Ugh, Dorian, come on.
Yeah, yes, yeah.
And you
and your husband's sex life?
My soon-to-be ex-husband
and I had a very good sex life.
Happy to hear it,
because it allows me
to state with confidence that
your problem isn't physical.
Well, good.
That's a relief.
You already knew it wasn't,
or you would've prescribed
yourself Viagra.
Your block
is psychological, emotional.
So get emoting.
What's this about?
[sighs]
Okay, um,
okay.
Yeah, um, um, today was, um,
I tell you, would've been
the first time I had sex
with somebody since Martin,
which is a big deal, you know?
In the heat of the moment,
with this beautiful guy,
I, uh, I didn't feel turned on.
I didn't feel...
You know,
I didn't feel charged.
I felt...
I felt guilty.
You know, 'cause there we are
about to do it.
We're gonna have sex,
and we're gonna share this,
like, sacred space, and uh,
that was me destroying
the final thread of connection
- between Martin and I...
- No.
I'm sorry, what?
Not buying it.
You don't get
to say that to me, all right?
Your sex life wasn't a sacred
space when you were signing up
for no-face dating apps.
- [scoffs]
- Whatever caused your E.D.,
it's not your ex-husband.
Try again...
This time with honesty, please.
[percussive beat]
Please set the gain at
200 microvolts per centimeter.
You know...
I might set the gain
to 100 microvolts.
It's more sensitive.
I don't wanna miss anything.
Set the gain at 100, please.
[monitor beeping]
Set.
Let's start with
the radio frequency ablation
of the macro-reentrant
right atrial pathway.
Yo, hold on, hold on.
You're gonna approach the main
bypass track from the right?
The left's atrial pathway
might be easier.
You think we should approach
from the left?
Yes.
You know what?
As a matter of fact, just, uh...
Can someone grab me a laptop
and just put it here,
bedside?
- A laptop?
- Yeah, put it right here.
I could probably
just do it myself.
You can do it yourself?
I just...
All I need is my right hand.
Oh, okay, great.
Hey.
Diana, where you goin'?
Okay, I'll shut up.
[clears throat]
Can I, uh, talk to you...
Talk to you for a minute?
"Sorry, I'm busy.
I can't talk right now."
Yeah,
I found a lump in my neck,
making breakfast
for Luna this morning,
and, uh, it wasn't there,
and then suddenly...
[snaps finger]
It was,
and, uh,
I'm walking Luna to school,
and I'm thinking,
you know, Georgia is gone,
and now, Helen is gone,
and then what if in a year...
What if I'm gone,
and I just leave Luna...
alone?
[♪ ♪]
[vocalizes] Max...
It almost, uh, killed me
the first time...
The chemo and the radiation.
I got through it,
but what if I don't next time?
I guess that's why
I'm pushing everyone...
Pushing you so hard,
'cause you can't push off
what your body needs,
not till tomorrow
or next week.
It's just today.
[soft dramatic music]
[♪ ♪]
So anyway, I got an MRI
when I first got here.
"When do you
get your results?"
Oh, later this afternoon.
Would you take a look?
[♪ ♪]
"I don't think I can."
Why not?
"I'll be in surgery."
[♪ ♪]
"For my wrists."
[♪ ♪]
Mm.
Nurse Parker, ER.
Nurse Parker, ER.
[percussive beat]
[♪ ♪]
[knock at door]
[♪ ♪]
Wow, trying to get into
the "Guinness Book
of World Records"?
You know, the key is dipping
that into water first.
Did I call for a consult?
School bus jumped a curb.
We're about to get flooded
with a whole lot of bumps
and bruises, which means
your disgusting gorge-fest
is gonna have to wait.
Fine.
Do I have something
in my teeth?
Funny.
I need a portable chest,
bay 30!
I got
multiple head lacerations
and possible concussion in 27.
Okay, let's order a CT scan.
- Which?
- Both.
[indistinct]
Bus driver hit
the windshield.
- Is he critical?
- Vitals stable.
Okay, let's get him
to Trauma One.
Okay, um, I need an air splint
for the soccer coach, bay 25!
- My son, Jabari...
- Yes, yeah, I've seen him.
He's fine.
He's in Bay 5
with a broken wrist
and really dark sense of humor.
- Huxley.
- I'll take you.
[voices echoing]
Uh, all right,
let's fix this broken pinky.
All right, okay, on three.
- One, two...
- Wait.
- Is it gonna hurt?
- Not at all, okay?
On three.
But wait...
I'm scared.
Arlette,
I need help over here!
Bay 24!
We all get scared, but we can't
go through life with a pinky
shaped like a bendy straw,
can we?
- Okay.
- Okay.
On three. One, two...
[pinky cracks]
Brunstetter, splint!
See?
Easy-peasy.
Kid with LLC?
All right, I need two IVs
- and a portable chest.
- I paged surgery.
Okay, now page
every other department.
Right.
Hey, how you feelin'?
Yeah, I'm a little hungry.
Go.
[voices echoing]
[sustained ringing]
[screams]
[yells] What's happening to me?
You're about to have a baby.
Hey, can we get
some help over there?
- Busy!
- [sighing]
[dramatic music]
[♪ ♪]
[sighs]
I don't know
what you want me to tell you.
The truth.
How hard is that?
Not the first time you've heard
that today, one suspects.
Oh, man, my marriage
of 15 years is ending,
and I don't think
it's that ridiculous to suggest
that maybe that's
the root of my problem.
Tell me about your date.
Um, I did already.
Not the boudoir.
The date.
All right, all right.
So he was hot.
You know, way out of my league.
That's not me being
self-deprecating.
That's just the facts,
all right?
Objectively speaking,
he was like if Apollo
walked off of Mount Olympus.
You know, but our profiles
matched up on the app,
and, uh,
I didn't pursue it at first,
because I thought
it was too far-fetched.
But then he beeped me.
Is that a euphemism?
Is that a what?
No, he beeped...
If you like someone's profile
on the app, you beep them.
You p... you ping them.
Do you understand
what I'm talking about?
Anyway, he set it up.
He reached out,
and, uh,
and then he propositioned me
before we even got dessert.
Essentially,
it was the easiest date
of all time.
You know, all I had to do
- was just say yes.
- Hmm.
Sounds familiar.
Oh, is that your usual?
Must be nice to be so popular.
It's familiar,
because it's extremely
reminiscent of your first date
with someone else.
[sentimental music]
[♪ ♪]
Martin?
Isn't that your origin myth?
Staggeringly handsome Martin
swoops down on dear, sweet Iggy
at the bar
and picks him right up.
The location's different,
but the dynamics...
Exactly the same.
Moments ago, you said your
marriage of 15 years is ending.
Now, that is a sentence without
a subject, but this divorce
didn't just happen.
Your relationship is ending
because someone
decided to end it.
Which of you was it?
[♪ ♪]
Me.
Damn right.
You felt so strongly
it was over
that you upended
your entire life,
and then for your first
post-Martin intimacy,
you chose a man
who replicated every part
of the relationship
you just left.
[sighs]
Your impotence
wasn't your body failing.
It was your body
giving you a warning.
This is not what you want.
Why did you end you marriage?
[♪ ♪]
Because I couldn't be
who I wanted to be.
Well, marvelous news...
Now you can.
The question is
who do you wanna be?
[♪ ♪]
[sighs]
I was out of line,
and I apologize.
Keep going.
[sighs]
I have a hard time
giving up control, and...
I'm sorry.
[sighs]
Uh...
Guess who's behind the wheel
when I'm in a car.
At a barbecue,
guess who's at the grill.
I think it all comes down
to...
my dad leaving
when I was a kid.
I mean, you know how it goes.
Everyone said,
"You gon' be the man
of the house now."
I guess I took that to heart,
and, uh,
I never let it go.
So you didn't have a mother?
Yeah, uh,
yeah, I had a mother.
Was this mother not capable
of running the household?
Well?
Answer the woman.
[sighs]
Yeah, uh, yeah.
I guess she... she was capable...
Is... is very capable.
She's a force of nature.
So you're telling me that
your mother was a competent,
highly intelligent woman
who knew how to do
what she needed to do.
"Heal" by Tom Odell...
[♪ ♪]
Okay, you know what?
Just knock me out, please,
for the sake of everyone.
[♪ ♪]
♪ Take my mind,
and take my pain ♪
[♪ ♪]
[screams]
You're doing great, Aria.
You're doing great.
Baby's heart rate's dropping,
another decel.
♪ Heal, heal ♪
Okay, the umbilical cord is
wrapped around the baby's neck.
- [shrieks] What?
- Hold on, hold on,
- hold on, Aria.
- [crying] No, no, no!
Aria, I can fix it!
Aria, Aria, Aria,
you have to trust me right now,
okay?
I can fix it, okay?
- [breathing heavily]
- Okay, okay, come on.
Come on, come on, come on.
[breathing heavily]
[indistinct]
Okay, almost got it.
Almost got it.
- Damn.
- [crying]
What does that mean?
Okay, I thought I had it,
but I can't unwrap the cord.
Another decel.
[voice echoing]
Fetal scalp blood pH 6.8.
Okay, page OB stat.
[♪ ♪]
[monitor beeping]
Tourniquet inflation
is effective.
♪ Take the heart,
take the hand ♪
Give me the status of
the distal edge of the TCL.
♪ Like an ocean takes
the dirty sand ♪
Thank you.
For what?
For changing her mind
about the procedure.
Not a lot of people
can do that with Elizabeth.
Uh...
no, actually,
no one can do that
with Elizabeth...
Except for you.
[♪ ♪]
♪ Empty bottle
takes the rain ♪
[phone vibrates]
[♪ ♪]
♪ Heal, heal ♪
♪ Help heal ♪
[♪ ♪]
♪ And tell me
some things last ♪
As you can see,
there's definitely a mass,
and we can't say
whether or not it's cancerous
without a biopsy.
Of course.
So I suggest
we don't drag our heels.
I'd like to get some tissue
to the pathologist today,
then based on his findings...
♪ And tell me
some things last ♪
[♪ ♪]
♪ And tell me some ♪
♪ Things last ♪
[screaming]
Where the hell is OB?
Emergency C-section on I and D...
at least an hour away.
[breathing heavily]
[whispering]
Okay, okay, okay, okay.
[sighs]
[exasperated breathing]
Okay, there's the...
There's the scalp.
There's the scalp.
There's the scalp.
Ah!
Okay, right down
from the ear,
right down from the ear.
Okay, there's the cord.
There's the cord.
Gently over the scalp.
[grunting]
Come on! Come on.
Okay, okay, I got it, I got it.
Oh, the baby,
the baby, the baby, no!
Aria, Aria, Aria,
your baby is crowning!
[screaming]
Okay, Aria,
I need you to look at me.
Aria, Aria!
Bring your focus
to your breath, okay?
Okay, I got you.
I got you, I got you.
Breathe with me.
Come on, Aria,
that's it, that's it.
Breathe.
[both breathing heavily]
Breathe. That's it. Breathe.
[breathing calms]
On the next breath,
I want you to push, okay?
Okay, I need you to push.
Okay, and push.
[screams]
Aria!
Aria, your baby's
right shoulder is out.
I need you to give me
one more push.
Come on!
Come on, Aria!
- You got this!
- [grunting]
[baby crying]
[sighing]
Okay, you did it, Aria.
You did it.
[laughing]
[baby crying]
[dramatic music]
[♪ ♪]
Hi.
[♪ ♪]
[laugh-crying]
You did it, Aria.
[baby crying]
She's perfect.
[♪ ♪]
Hey.
Hey.
Are you new?
I usually know
everybody in my O.R.
It wasn't your O.R. though,
was it?
[bed whirring]
Hmm, touché.
I started here last week.
- How do you like it?
- Dr. Reynolds,
I have worked
on four continents,
in six countries
and 27 different cities,
and I can say without a doubt
that you are the worst patient
I've ever encountered.
And Dr. Flores, she's literally
drinking in a bar right now
- because of you.
- [stifles laughter]
Hey,
what'd you say your name was?
I didn't.
Hm.
[percussive beat]
[♪ ♪]
Okay,
get your prescription pad.
Meet me by the scales.
- It's been 12 hours.
- Get it.
[♪ ♪]
Okay.
[device beeps]
- Wow.
- Told you.
You actually lost a pound.
No, that's not possible.
No, I... I gained at least
five pounds... what?
No, that's impossible!
I mean, I... I housed, like,
two orders of egg rolls.
I mean, I crushed
the stuffed-crust pizza,
a bear claw.
I mean, how have I not gained
any weight?
Wha... I raced
around all day today
searching
for high-calorie food.
I mean, I even skipped
a bathroom break,
so I could run
across to third for poutine.
There's gotta be some kind
of mistake with this thing.
Well, check your phone
and see how many steps
you walked.
[sighs]
25,201.
Well, that's about 18 miles.
Come back next week.
[sustained ringing]
[slow, labored breathing]
[siren blaring in distance]
Are you okay?
"Here Comes the River"
by Patrick Watson...
♪ The windows
turn to fishbowls ♪
♪ The city to seas ♪
♪ Cars were drowning ♪
♪ Underneath your feet ♪
Actually, I am.
You wanna try
going more than a week?
♪ The top of the trees ♪
Yeah.
♪ Crowd of umbrellas ♪
Yeah, I think I do.
Yeah, who knows?
Maybe
you don't need them anymore.
♪ Mary kept sewing ♪
[sighs]
♪ Holding on to her TV ♪
[♪ ♪]
♪ Even if the water ♪
[knock at door]
Waiting for a call?
Uh, something like that.
How can I help?
Oh, yeah, uh, I just popped
by because I wanted to tell you
that today was quite possibly
the most mortifying day
of the last 40 years
of my life.
Heard that from some
of the other department heads.
Yeah, yeah, I bet you did.
Yeah, I can't speak for them.
I can only speak
from my experience.
But, uh, your little experiment
felt embarrassing.
It was humiliating.
It was painfully awkward,
and I can't begin
to thank you enough.
Y... sorry, really?
Yeah, really.
Thanks to you, I was, uh,
I was forced to look inward,
and I had a breakthrough.
- You did?
- I did...
One that I needed more than
I could've ever have known.
- There you go!
- Yeah.
Now, if you'll excuse me,
I am off to have consensual sex
with a stranger of my choosing.
Uh, I think that's great.
Heal thyself, Max.
Heal thyself.
[chuckles]
[phone vibrating]
Dr. Gellar.
Yeah, no, no.
I can talk.
♪ Nobody told you ♪
Uh-huh.
♪ It was gonna
be this hard ♪
[♪ ♪]
♪ Something's been building ♪
♪ Behind your eyes ♪
[♪ ♪]
♪ You lost
what you hold onto ♪
[♪ ♪]
♪ Losing control ♪
♪ There ain't any words
in this world ♪
♪ That's gonna
cure this pain ♪
[♪ ♪]
♪ Sometimes ♪
♪ It's gonna fall
down on your shoulders ♪
♪ But you're gonna stand
through it all ♪
[laughs]
[♪ ♪]
♪ Here comes the river ♪
[♪ ♪]
♪ Comin' on strong ♪
[♪ ♪]
- You want?
- ♪ Head above these troubled waters ♪
[♪ ♪]
♪ Here comes the river ♪
[♪ ♪]
♪ Over the flames ♪
[♪ ♪]
♪ Sometimes you gotta burn ♪
[vocalizes] Thank you.
♪ To keep the storm away ♪
[muted voice]
How's your throat?
[♪ ♪]
♪ Sometimes ♪
♪ You're cast adrift ♪
[laughs]
[sighs]
Vocalizes...
[♪ ♪]
[♪ ♪]
"New Amsterdam"...
I can... I can't be
who I want to be
with you.
[sighs]
I think
I might have to crash here.
Yeah, sure thing, sis.
You're sober, Lauren.
You can't handle
that kind of
- temptation.
- What I can't handle is guilt, okay?
She's a mess because I left
her there with my mother.
You went from
Norman Rockwell to screaming.
Could've gone to jail.
No, we're not goin' fishing.
We're going home.
You've been pestering me
for months!
It sounds like
a textbook example
of someone
with bipolar disorder.
[dramatic music]
[♪ ♪]
[muted voice] Friends.
[whispers] Friends.
[♪ ♪]
Move, move, move,
move, move, move.
- [all scream]
- Clear a path!
Clear a path!
[♪ ♪]
Hey, you get Max's page?
You only got one?
[♪ ♪]
- What do three 911s mean?
- Can't be anything good.
Oh, excuse me,
excuse me, coming through!
- Did he page everyone?
- Yes, this must be bad.
- Make a damn hole!
- Move aside, please.
Move. Move. Move.
Max, what's wrong?
- What's the emergency?
- What is it?
Is everything okay
with the hospital?
Is it a mass casualty?
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
- Tell me Veronica's not back.
- Hold on.
Just take a seat.
All right?
Come on in.
Why don't you take a breath?
In fact, why don't we all take
a nice, deep breath with me?
Ready? In...
[all inhale]
And out.
[all exhale]
There we go.
Doesn't that feel better?
Yeah?
Okay, now that we are
nice and relaxed,
I have some bad news.
You are all
in critical condition.
What... what does that mean,
exactly?
Well, it means that morale
for doctors
is at an all-time low.
You gotta be kiddin' me, Max.
Uh, not kidding.
Burnout and turnover
are at an all-time high,
and if it continues
at this pace,
we're not gonna have enough
staff to keep the doors open.
Yeah, you made this sound
like it was a real emergency.
This is a real emergency.
Your hours are too long.
Your downtime is too short,
and you don't have
the mental space
to take care of yourselves.
And if you can't do that,
how are you gonna
take care of your patients?
- [people whispering]
- [coughing]
I got some surgeries
to attend to.
Well, actually, you don't,
because I took the liberty
of clearing
your entire schedule.
In fact, nobody in this room
has anything urgent
to do today,
because today, your one
and only patient is you.
[upbeat music]
[♪ ♪]
I hope everyone gets as excited
as Dr. Lauren Bloom here.
Yes, question.
Elizabeth?
- "No."
- Okay, not really a question,
but, uh, the answer is yes.
We are all going to prioritize
the health issues
that we have been putting off,
because we're either
too busy or too tired.
- Now say it with me.
- Please don't.
We can do it.
Ready?
Doctors, heal thyself!
Oh, God.
[all muttering]
[laughs] Ooh.
[♪ ♪]
Ooh, I think
the New Amsterdam newsletter
has found its centerfold.
Pretty sure you're not
allowed to say stuff
- like that anymore.
- Yeah.
Let me.
[monitor beeping]
This latest Max plan is such
a ridiculous waste of time.
Suck it up.
I just got my first
mammogram in three years.
It had been weighing
on my mind,
but I had no time
to do anything about it.
- And?
- I'm in perfect health,
and you'll be too.
What?
If this is a bit,
it's not funny.
You... you have a short
PR interval and a delta wave
at onset of the QRS complex.
Are you suggesting
pre-excitation syndrome?
No, I am saying it flat-out.
You have
Wolf-Parkinson-White Syndrome.
I'm fitting you in for
a catheter ablation at 4:00.
[sighs]
Nah.
Floyd, you know the risks
of a re-entrant tachycardia.
What I do know is that
they're not as immediate
as the risk posed to my five
patients I had scheduled today.
Now, I did my part
for Max's stupid plan.
I'm gonna go tend to them.
I'll deal with this
on my next day off.
Oh, when is that?
Yeah, I'll see you at 4:00,
hot stuff.
[♪ ♪]
So it's so nice to
finally meet you
in the flesh, Ronel, you know?
Not that our emoji-ladened
chats on the app
haven't been fun.
Cowboy hat, cowboy hat,
fireworks.
[laughs]
Uh, spaceship,
pretzel, sunglasses.
You've always been so busy,
and now you're suddenly free?
- Yeah.
- Did you get fired?
[laughs] No, no...
Not that I know of, anyway.
No, no, I'm as shocked
as you are.
You know, my boss he, uh...
He insisted that all of us
take a health day...
You know, out of the blue.
Initially,
I was really resentful,
but then I realized that,
like, it had been so long
since I had actual
human-to-human contact
outside of work that I thought
this was the most healthy thing
I could do.
So you wanna hit it?
What... do I wanna hit it?
Uh...
[laughs nervously]
Yeah, I mean, I'd love...
I'd love to hit it.
But you know,
I heard that this place
has a wonderful tarte Tatin
that's apparently
somethin' else.
It's nothing compared
to what I'd like to give you.
Doctor's orders, right?
[♪ ♪]
[clears throat]
'Scuse me.
Check, please.
I... so, sorry...
So, so sorry.
Okay, spoiler alert.
This one is going to be
clean as a whistle.
I mean pristine.
You seem real proud
of this sample.
Oh, I am, yeah.
You have any idea
how hard it is staying sober,
- living with my sister?
- Can't say I do.
Well, she wakes up
to tequila shots.
Yeah, her apartment
is like one big pharmacy.
Essentially,
the whole thing is, like,
one big trigger for me.
BP's good.
Now let's check your weight.
I guess I'd be lying
if I said it hadn't
tested my sobriety,
but she needs me, you know?
- Mm-hmm.
- What does it cost me, right...
To finally be there for her?
It looks like
you lost five pounds.
Oh.
Why, thank you, doctor.
You need to stop
taking your Adderall.
I'm sorry, what?
You're underweight,
and the protocol is clear.
So I can't refill
your prescription,
and you'll have to hand over
any pills you have.
So you just want me
to quit cold turkey?
I'm just following
the protocols.
Yeah, but you're not
gonna hold me to that.
You know that this
is a class of medication
that makes it harder
to maintain weight,
and yours is dangerously low.
You know,
if I don't get my meds...
you know what happens.
My hands are tied here.
I get irritable,
anxious, distracted.
- I can't focus.
- Lauren...
the bottle.
[tense music]
[♪ ♪]
I run
an emergency department.
I mean, I can't do that
if I, myself, am in a state
of emergency.
[♪ ♪]
Look, come back at the end
of the week
for another weigh-in.
If you put on the weight,
I'm happy to give you
your pills back.
[♪ ♪]
Okay.
[♪ ♪]
Just take
the rest of the week off.
I'm perfectly capable
of running the E.D.
- if you recall.
- Actually, as I recall,
- you needed me to do it.
- Wow, already,
the moodiness is upon us.
That was fast.
No, it's just
a couple of pounds.
I mean, I'm gonna have it
handled by lunchtime,
'cause I got a plan...
Right there.
See?
- All right, let's do this!
- I've never been so inspired.
- What do we got?
- Displaced patient,
32 weeks gestation
and contracting.
Uh, why didn't we send her
up to the OB?
I did.
They sent her back... no room.
Oh, the cafeteria served
the eggplant parm again?
Like clockwork.
Every time, we get flooded
- with patients in labor.
- The ergots are gonna get ya.
Hi, Aria.
I'm Dr. Bloom.
So your contractions are
what we call Braxton-Hicks.
It's actually fake labor,
but it's nothing
to stress over.
My husband's in Cleveland.
Should he fly back?
No, no.
There is no need
to disrupt his day, okay?
What you need
is rest and peace.
So I'm just gonna move you
to a quieter part of the E.D.
where you can relax, okay?
I'll be right back to check
on you in just a moment.
All right, who's got grub?
I was gonna eat that one.
With that,
ladies and gentlemen,
we coast right into aggression.
Closed for the day, good.
Closed.
Closed, excellent.
Closed. Great.
Oh, hey.
Sorry to micromanage.
I'm just, uh, goin' around,
checkin' in to see how people
are doing
with today's mandate, so...
"Me?
Oh, well, uh, you know,
"I just took a power nap.
[groans]
That was... wow.
Best five minutes of my day."
Huh, yeah, naps are good,
but I was kind of looking
for more of a designated,
real self-care day...
You know,
appointments and procedures,
that kind of thing.
Is there anything you've been
letting fall by the wayside?
- Mm-mm.
- "Nope."
Come on.
Surely there's something.
- What?
- Uh...
"Uh," what?
What?
What was that?
That was something.
That's "Him... him.
Tell... tell him."
That means, "Tell him."
I know what that means.
Tell me.
What?
He's right.
- Okay.
- "I need surgery.
But it's really
not a big deal."
Mm.
[light suspenseful music]
[♪ ♪]
Uh, but see the thing is,
surgery is kind of a big deal,
because it's surgery.
So what is it?
[whispers] I have...
"I have
carpal tunnel syndrome."
Well... well,
that's fixable, right?
"Yes, sure.
Uh, physical therapy,
"acupuncture,
icing your wrists twice a day,
"steroid shots and all that.
It did not work.
Now surgery
is the only option."
Well, uh, so you...
You get it.
- [laughs]
- "It is my hands, Max.
"Even if everything
goes perfectly,
I wouldn't be able
to use my hands for weeks."
[♪ ♪]
- Well, but you...
- Stay!
Just...
[♪ ♪]
[groans]
[door creaks]
Ignatius,
you look positively trounced,
though, not necessarily
in a bad way.
Hello, Dorian.
It's nice to see you.
You know, you would think
that being a psychiatrist,
you would know
a little more about tact...
You know,
especially after practicing
for what, 900 years now?
Ouch.
[under breath] I'm sorry.
Dorian.
Dorian, I'm sorry.
Hey, I just... it's just...
It's us.
- Psychiatrists?
- No, gay people.
- Why is our culture like this?
- I completely agree.
I say this Gaga person
is no Streisand,
and I don't care who knows.
I am talking about
our obsession with sex, Dorian.
You know on some
of these dating apps,
they don't even want
a picture of your face?
- That's awful.
- Yeah!
What did you say
the name of that one was?
Of course, gosh.
It's dehumanizing, you know?
The last time I was
in the dating pool,
which was pre-internet,
you had to talk to someone
before you just took 'em home.
Yes, that's what gay clubs
have all been famous for...
- Talking.
- Look, I'm just saying
that I was shocked
at how bad it is out there.
That's all.
In my day,
the best I could hope for
was a furtive meeting
in a park,
while keeping my fingers
crossed that no vice cops
- were watching.
- Right.
Talking wasn't exactly
at a premium then either.
But what this sounds like,
to my experienced ears,
is a guy complaining
after a bad date.
No, no, wrong, completely.
[quirky music]
Yeah, okay,
I mean, yes, I had a date.
I did have a date,
but it wasn't bad.
It wasn't bad at all.
It was just, you know, off.
He didn't want
to have sex with you.
Um, in fact, he did,
Rylance, thank you very much.
But it wasn't that.
It was his approach, you know?
It was his, um...
It was his directness.
He didn't really
wanna get to know me,
and it, uh,
it just threw off my game.
- That's all.
- You couldn't get an erection.
Oh...
Man, come on. Hey.
Yes, yes,
I couldn't get an erection.
The last thing you need is to
treat this issue with silence.
Oh, just because I don't want
my entire department
to know that I couldn't
get it up,
doesn't mean
I don't wanna deal with it.
Iggy, you just asked me
to agree with your rant
about gay culture, thus,
validating the notion
that your erectile dysfunction
is everyone else's fault.
But I won't, and it isn't.
If you're experiencing E.D.,
Iggy, that's about you.
[soft dramatic music]
[humming]
[percussive beat]
[♪ ♪]
What's going on?
I couldn't help but notice
you reassigned your surgeries
back to yourself,
so I took the liberty
of re-reassigning them
back to other surgeons.
[chuckles]
I'm the chair.
You need approval to do that.
- Yeah, she got approval.
- What the hell?
Do you remember
that little speech I gave
about three hours ago
about doctors
taking care of themselves?
That wasn't just advice.
That was actually an order that
you're apparently ignoring.
So we have decided to take
matters into our own hands,
and we're gonna take care
of that
Wolf-Parkinson-White Syndrome.
Max...
Oh, I have an opening right
now.
You're in good hands,
my friend.
I never liked you...
Either of you.
- I am fine with that.
- I think he's excited.
Yeah, I think he is.
I'm just saying five pounds
is a lot to put on in one day.
I've got science on my side.
I've got an extra-large
vegan, veggie,
double meatless chicken pie.
Need our ooey-gooey
garlic cheese dipping sauce?
Ha, more than you even know.
Uh, okay...
- What, did you skip breakfast?
- Watch it, pal.
I've got a bunch
of scalpels back there.
All right, keep the change.
Thank you.
Okay,
time to pack on the pounds.
[door slams open]
I've got a male, 30s,
complaining of stomach pains
and vomiting blood.
Or not.
- [groans]
- Right, yeah,
okay, that sounds
like a stomach ulcer.
Stomach ulcer?
No, that can't happen.
I'm supposed to work
a double tonight.
I'm afraid Red Papayas
is gonna have
to make do without you.
We need to perform an emergency
endoscopy.
Let's get him
in the procedure room.
Okay, I need two
large-bore IVs,
normal saline, wide open.
Start a propofol drip, and let's...
oh, shoot,
uh, just a sec.
Hi, Aria, how are you feeling?
- Much better, thank you.
- Oh, great, 'cause we need
to move you to a quieter part
of the hospital, okay?
- Oh.
- You're gonna love it.
Oh, okay.
All right, let's do this.
[dramatic music]
I can't see a thing.
Okay.
Irrigating...
That ulcer's
gotta be in here, somewhere.
Come out.
Come out wherever you are.
Try deeper in the antrum.
[♪ ♪]
Okay,
getting closer.
There, three o'clock.
Whoa, ulcer eroded
into the artery.
It's a real pumper.
I... I can't see anything.
BP's dropping.
You gotta zap it.
- No, Walsh, just...
- You gotta zap it now!
Those are
the exact coordinates.
- Now!
- Just zoom in.
D... on the monitor!
G... just...
Use fully
thought-out sentences!
Fully thought-out.
Switching to cautery mode.
[device beeping]
- [beeping stops]
- You got it.
[♪ ♪]
That was a close one.
[gloves snap off]
Try salty food.
You really need
to get back on your meds.
[sighs]
Oh, um, hello.
Dr. Yamadi.
"Dr. Yamadi, I'm so sorry
to keep you waiting.
Give me just a moment, please."
[percussive beat]
[♪ ♪]
[mouse clicking]
[♪ ♪]
"So tell me about your cancer.
When were you diagnosed?"
I'm fine.
I'm here to see you.
Carpal tunnel, right?
[laughs]
"A hand surgeon?"
Well, not just
any hand surgeon...
The best hand surgeon
in Manhattan just for you.
"Oh, just for me?
Oh, well, thank you,
- wonderful."
- I know that you're worried
about taking care
of your patients, all right?
But by getting this surgery,
you are taking care
of your patients.
And Yamadi is so good
that you'll be performing
surgery again in no time.
- [vocalizes]
- "You have overstepped, Max."
All right, how much pain
are you in right now?
Scale of one to ten...
- [vocalizes angrily]
- How much discomfort
in your wrists?
- "Six."
- What does that really mean?
- Eight.
- "Eight."
And today was
your clinic day,
which means no surgeries.
So how bad is it
when you operate?
[screams]
- [squeals]
- Elizabeth.
- Elizabeth.
- [squeals]
[soft dramatic music]
You can tell me
it's none of my business.
And as a friend,
you'd be right,
but I am also
the medical director.
And as a surgeon,
your hands are your gift.
- [vocalizes]
- What would you say
to a patient who was ignoring
this kind of pain?
- [vocalizes]
- "Yes, Max, my hands
are my career.
But..."
[whispers vocalization]
"They're also my way
of connecting with the world."
[♪ ♪]
"Surgery means I won't be able
to communicate for weeks."
[♪ ♪]
"No ASL,
"no writing, no texting..."
[♪ ♪]
"Not being able
to take care of myself,
and not being able to say
what I need."
[♪ ♪]
"It's not recovery.
Max, you would be
putting me in a prison."
[♪ ♪]
[sobs]
[♪ ♪]
- [elevator dings]
- Oh, wonderful news.
I have high blood pressure,
and now I'm very anxious.
Oh, uh, take an ACE inhibitor
and call Dr. Frome.
My CAT scan was inconclusive,
so I'm gonna need another day
off for a follow-up.
You got it.
What?
There's a reason
I don't pick up
my meds from the pharmacy.
They remind me I'm sick.
Why can't I live
in denial like my patients?
Guess who did what you said
and got their ADHD meds
confiscated.
- Why?
- Doesn't matter.
What does matter
is you were right.
Taking care of yourself
feels great!
Ah.
Have you been
pleasuring yourself?
[scoffs]
Uh, the correct medical
terminology nowadays
- is... is non-partnered sex.
- Of course.
Thank you.
So have you been whacking it?
Ugh, Dorian, come on.
Yeah, yes, yeah.
And you
and your husband's sex life?
My soon-to-be ex-husband
and I had a very good sex life.
Happy to hear it,
because it allows me
to state with confidence that
your problem isn't physical.
Well, good.
That's a relief.
You already knew it wasn't,
or you would've prescribed
yourself Viagra.
Your block
is psychological, emotional.
So get emoting.
What's this about?
[sighs]
Okay, um,
okay.
Yeah, um, um, today was, um,
I tell you, would've been
the first time I had sex
with somebody since Martin,
which is a big deal, you know?
In the heat of the moment,
with this beautiful guy,
I, uh, I didn't feel turned on.
I didn't feel...
You know,
I didn't feel charged.
I felt...
I felt guilty.
You know, 'cause there we are
about to do it.
We're gonna have sex,
and we're gonna share this,
like, sacred space, and uh,
that was me destroying
the final thread of connection
- between Martin and I...
- No.
I'm sorry, what?
Not buying it.
You don't get
to say that to me, all right?
Your sex life wasn't a sacred
space when you were signing up
for no-face dating apps.
- [scoffs]
- Whatever caused your E.D.,
it's not your ex-husband.
Try again...
This time with honesty, please.
[percussive beat]
Please set the gain at
200 microvolts per centimeter.
You know...
I might set the gain
to 100 microvolts.
It's more sensitive.
I don't wanna miss anything.
Set the gain at 100, please.
[monitor beeping]
Set.
Let's start with
the radio frequency ablation
of the macro-reentrant
right atrial pathway.
Yo, hold on, hold on.
You're gonna approach the main
bypass track from the right?
The left's atrial pathway
might be easier.
You think we should approach
from the left?
Yes.
You know what?
As a matter of fact, just, uh...
Can someone grab me a laptop
and just put it here,
bedside?
- A laptop?
- Yeah, put it right here.
I could probably
just do it myself.
You can do it yourself?
I just...
All I need is my right hand.
Oh, okay, great.
Hey.
Diana, where you goin'?
Okay, I'll shut up.
[clears throat]
Can I, uh, talk to you...
Talk to you for a minute?
"Sorry, I'm busy.
I can't talk right now."
Yeah,
I found a lump in my neck,
making breakfast
for Luna this morning,
and, uh, it wasn't there,
and then suddenly...
[snaps finger]
It was,
and, uh,
I'm walking Luna to school,
and I'm thinking,
you know, Georgia is gone,
and now, Helen is gone,
and then what if in a year...
What if I'm gone,
and I just leave Luna...
alone?
[♪ ♪]
[vocalizes] Max...
It almost, uh, killed me
the first time...
The chemo and the radiation.
I got through it,
but what if I don't next time?
I guess that's why
I'm pushing everyone...
Pushing you so hard,
'cause you can't push off
what your body needs,
not till tomorrow
or next week.
It's just today.
[soft dramatic music]
[♪ ♪]
So anyway, I got an MRI
when I first got here.
"When do you
get your results?"
Oh, later this afternoon.
Would you take a look?
[♪ ♪]
"I don't think I can."
Why not?
"I'll be in surgery."
[♪ ♪]
"For my wrists."
[♪ ♪]
Mm.
Nurse Parker, ER.
Nurse Parker, ER.
[percussive beat]
[♪ ♪]
[knock at door]
[♪ ♪]
Wow, trying to get into
the "Guinness Book
of World Records"?
You know, the key is dipping
that into water first.
Did I call for a consult?
School bus jumped a curb.
We're about to get flooded
with a whole lot of bumps
and bruises, which means
your disgusting gorge-fest
is gonna have to wait.
Fine.
Do I have something
in my teeth?
Funny.
I need a portable chest,
bay 30!
I got
multiple head lacerations
and possible concussion in 27.
Okay, let's order a CT scan.
- Which?
- Both.
[indistinct]
Bus driver hit
the windshield.
- Is he critical?
- Vitals stable.
Okay, let's get him
to Trauma One.
Okay, um, I need an air splint
for the soccer coach, bay 25!
- My son, Jabari...
- Yes, yeah, I've seen him.
He's fine.
He's in Bay 5
with a broken wrist
and really dark sense of humor.
- Huxley.
- I'll take you.
[voices echoing]
Uh, all right,
let's fix this broken pinky.
All right, okay, on three.
- One, two...
- Wait.
- Is it gonna hurt?
- Not at all, okay?
On three.
But wait...
I'm scared.
Arlette,
I need help over here!
Bay 24!
We all get scared, but we can't
go through life with a pinky
shaped like a bendy straw,
can we?
- Okay.
- Okay.
On three. One, two...
[pinky cracks]
Brunstetter, splint!
See?
Easy-peasy.
Kid with LLC?
All right, I need two IVs
- and a portable chest.
- I paged surgery.
Okay, now page
every other department.
Right.
Hey, how you feelin'?
Yeah, I'm a little hungry.
Go.
[voices echoing]
[sustained ringing]
[screams]
[yells] What's happening to me?
You're about to have a baby.
Hey, can we get
some help over there?
- Busy!
- [sighing]
[dramatic music]
[♪ ♪]
[sighs]
I don't know
what you want me to tell you.
The truth.
How hard is that?
Not the first time you've heard
that today, one suspects.
Oh, man, my marriage
of 15 years is ending,
and I don't think
it's that ridiculous to suggest
that maybe that's
the root of my problem.
Tell me about your date.
Um, I did already.
Not the boudoir.
The date.
All right, all right.
So he was hot.
You know, way out of my league.
That's not me being
self-deprecating.
That's just the facts,
all right?
Objectively speaking,
he was like if Apollo
walked off of Mount Olympus.
You know, but our profiles
matched up on the app,
and, uh,
I didn't pursue it at first,
because I thought
it was too far-fetched.
But then he beeped me.
Is that a euphemism?
Is that a what?
No, he beeped...
If you like someone's profile
on the app, you beep them.
You p... you ping them.
Do you understand
what I'm talking about?
Anyway, he set it up.
He reached out,
and, uh,
and then he propositioned me
before we even got dessert.
Essentially,
it was the easiest date
of all time.
You know, all I had to do
- was just say yes.
- Hmm.
Sounds familiar.
Oh, is that your usual?
Must be nice to be so popular.
It's familiar,
because it's extremely
reminiscent of your first date
with someone else.
[sentimental music]
[♪ ♪]
Martin?
Isn't that your origin myth?
Staggeringly handsome Martin
swoops down on dear, sweet Iggy
at the bar
and picks him right up.
The location's different,
but the dynamics...
Exactly the same.
Moments ago, you said your
marriage of 15 years is ending.
Now, that is a sentence without
a subject, but this divorce
didn't just happen.
Your relationship is ending
because someone
decided to end it.
Which of you was it?
[♪ ♪]
Me.
Damn right.
You felt so strongly
it was over
that you upended
your entire life,
and then for your first
post-Martin intimacy,
you chose a man
who replicated every part
of the relationship
you just left.
[sighs]
Your impotence
wasn't your body failing.
It was your body
giving you a warning.
This is not what you want.
Why did you end you marriage?
[♪ ♪]
Because I couldn't be
who I wanted to be.
Well, marvelous news...
Now you can.
The question is
who do you wanna be?
[♪ ♪]
[sighs]
I was out of line,
and I apologize.
Keep going.
[sighs]
I have a hard time
giving up control, and...
I'm sorry.
[sighs]
Uh...
Guess who's behind the wheel
when I'm in a car.
At a barbecue,
guess who's at the grill.
I think it all comes down
to...
my dad leaving
when I was a kid.
I mean, you know how it goes.
Everyone said,
"You gon' be the man
of the house now."
I guess I took that to heart,
and, uh,
I never let it go.
So you didn't have a mother?
Yeah, uh,
yeah, I had a mother.
Was this mother not capable
of running the household?
Well?
Answer the woman.
[sighs]
Yeah, uh, yeah.
I guess she... she was capable...
Is... is very capable.
She's a force of nature.
So you're telling me that
your mother was a competent,
highly intelligent woman
who knew how to do
what she needed to do.
"Heal" by Tom Odell...
[♪ ♪]
Okay, you know what?
Just knock me out, please,
for the sake of everyone.
[♪ ♪]
♪ Take my mind,
and take my pain ♪
[♪ ♪]
[screams]
You're doing great, Aria.
You're doing great.
Baby's heart rate's dropping,
another decel.
♪ Heal, heal ♪
Okay, the umbilical cord is
wrapped around the baby's neck.
- [shrieks] What?
- Hold on, hold on,
- hold on, Aria.
- [crying] No, no, no!
Aria, I can fix it!
Aria, Aria, Aria,
you have to trust me right now,
okay?
I can fix it, okay?
- [breathing heavily]
- Okay, okay, come on.
Come on, come on, come on.
[breathing heavily]
[indistinct]
Okay, almost got it.
Almost got it.
- Damn.
- [crying]
What does that mean?
Okay, I thought I had it,
but I can't unwrap the cord.
Another decel.
[voice echoing]
Fetal scalp blood pH 6.8.
Okay, page OB stat.
[♪ ♪]
[monitor beeping]
Tourniquet inflation
is effective.
♪ Take the heart,
take the hand ♪
Give me the status of
the distal edge of the TCL.
♪ Like an ocean takes
the dirty sand ♪
Thank you.
For what?
For changing her mind
about the procedure.
Not a lot of people
can do that with Elizabeth.
Uh...
no, actually,
no one can do that
with Elizabeth...
Except for you.
[♪ ♪]
♪ Empty bottle
takes the rain ♪
[phone vibrates]
[♪ ♪]
♪ Heal, heal ♪
♪ Help heal ♪
[♪ ♪]
♪ And tell me
some things last ♪
As you can see,
there's definitely a mass,
and we can't say
whether or not it's cancerous
without a biopsy.
Of course.
So I suggest
we don't drag our heels.
I'd like to get some tissue
to the pathologist today,
then based on his findings...
♪ And tell me
some things last ♪
[♪ ♪]
♪ And tell me some ♪
♪ Things last ♪
[screaming]
Where the hell is OB?
Emergency C-section on I and D...
at least an hour away.
[breathing heavily]
[whispering]
Okay, okay, okay, okay.
[sighs]
[exasperated breathing]
Okay, there's the...
There's the scalp.
There's the scalp.
There's the scalp.
Ah!
Okay, right down
from the ear,
right down from the ear.
Okay, there's the cord.
There's the cord.
Gently over the scalp.
[grunting]
Come on! Come on.
Okay, okay, I got it, I got it.
Oh, the baby,
the baby, the baby, no!
Aria, Aria, Aria,
your baby is crowning!
[screaming]
Okay, Aria,
I need you to look at me.
Aria, Aria!
Bring your focus
to your breath, okay?
Okay, I got you.
I got you, I got you.
Breathe with me.
Come on, Aria,
that's it, that's it.
Breathe.
[both breathing heavily]
Breathe. That's it. Breathe.
[breathing calms]
On the next breath,
I want you to push, okay?
Okay, I need you to push.
Okay, and push.
[screams]
Aria!
Aria, your baby's
right shoulder is out.
I need you to give me
one more push.
Come on!
Come on, Aria!
- You got this!
- [grunting]
[baby crying]
[sighing]
Okay, you did it, Aria.
You did it.
[laughing]
[baby crying]
[dramatic music]
[♪ ♪]
Hi.
[♪ ♪]
[laugh-crying]
You did it, Aria.
[baby crying]
She's perfect.
[♪ ♪]
Hey.
Hey.
Are you new?
I usually know
everybody in my O.R.
It wasn't your O.R. though,
was it?
[bed whirring]
Hmm, touché.
I started here last week.
- How do you like it?
- Dr. Reynolds,
I have worked
on four continents,
in six countries
and 27 different cities,
and I can say without a doubt
that you are the worst patient
I've ever encountered.
And Dr. Flores, she's literally
drinking in a bar right now
- because of you.
- [stifles laughter]
Hey,
what'd you say your name was?
I didn't.
Hm.
[percussive beat]
[♪ ♪]
Okay,
get your prescription pad.
Meet me by the scales.
- It's been 12 hours.
- Get it.
[♪ ♪]
Okay.
[device beeps]
- Wow.
- Told you.
You actually lost a pound.
No, that's not possible.
No, I... I gained at least
five pounds... what?
No, that's impossible!
I mean, I... I housed, like,
two orders of egg rolls.
I mean, I crushed
the stuffed-crust pizza,
a bear claw.
I mean, how have I not gained
any weight?
Wha... I raced
around all day today
searching
for high-calorie food.
I mean, I even skipped
a bathroom break,
so I could run
across to third for poutine.
There's gotta be some kind
of mistake with this thing.
Well, check your phone
and see how many steps
you walked.
[sighs]
25,201.
Well, that's about 18 miles.
Come back next week.
[sustained ringing]
[slow, labored breathing]
[siren blaring in distance]
Are you okay?
"Here Comes the River"
by Patrick Watson...
♪ The windows
turn to fishbowls ♪
♪ The city to seas ♪
♪ Cars were drowning ♪
♪ Underneath your feet ♪
Actually, I am.
You wanna try
going more than a week?
♪ The top of the trees ♪
Yeah.
♪ Crowd of umbrellas ♪
Yeah, I think I do.
Yeah, who knows?
Maybe
you don't need them anymore.
♪ Mary kept sewing ♪
[sighs]
♪ Holding on to her TV ♪
[♪ ♪]
♪ Even if the water ♪
[knock at door]
Waiting for a call?
Uh, something like that.
How can I help?
Oh, yeah, uh, I just popped
by because I wanted to tell you
that today was quite possibly
the most mortifying day
of the last 40 years
of my life.
Heard that from some
of the other department heads.
Yeah, yeah, I bet you did.
Yeah, I can't speak for them.
I can only speak
from my experience.
But, uh, your little experiment
felt embarrassing.
It was humiliating.
It was painfully awkward,
and I can't begin
to thank you enough.
Y... sorry, really?
Yeah, really.
Thanks to you, I was, uh,
I was forced to look inward,
and I had a breakthrough.
- You did?
- I did...
One that I needed more than
I could've ever have known.
- There you go!
- Yeah.
Now, if you'll excuse me,
I am off to have consensual sex
with a stranger of my choosing.
Uh, I think that's great.
Heal thyself, Max.
Heal thyself.
[chuckles]
[phone vibrating]
Dr. Gellar.
Yeah, no, no.
I can talk.
♪ Nobody told you ♪
Uh-huh.
♪ It was gonna
be this hard ♪
[♪ ♪]
♪ Something's been building ♪
♪ Behind your eyes ♪
[♪ ♪]
♪ You lost
what you hold onto ♪
[♪ ♪]
♪ Losing control ♪
♪ There ain't any words
in this world ♪
♪ That's gonna
cure this pain ♪
[♪ ♪]
♪ Sometimes ♪
♪ It's gonna fall
down on your shoulders ♪
♪ But you're gonna stand
through it all ♪
[laughs]
[♪ ♪]
♪ Here comes the river ♪
[♪ ♪]
♪ Comin' on strong ♪
[♪ ♪]
- You want?
- ♪ Head above these troubled waters ♪
[♪ ♪]
♪ Here comes the river ♪
[♪ ♪]
♪ Over the flames ♪
[♪ ♪]
♪ Sometimes you gotta burn ♪
[vocalizes] Thank you.
♪ To keep the storm away ♪
[muted voice]
How's your throat?
[♪ ♪]
♪ Sometimes ♪
♪ You're cast adrift ♪
[laughs]
[sighs]
Vocalizes...
[♪ ♪]
[♪ ♪]