My Babysitter's a Vampire (2011–2012): Season 1, Episode 12 - Three Geeks and a Demon - full transcript

- Oh, came an, honey, shake your tail feather.
- Oh, came an, honey, shake your tail feather.

Hey, Sarah.

Ethan, your babysittefs here.

- Hey, guys.
- Hi.

Heh. Oh, lack at you,
all dressed up for the senior pram.

- Nice suit.
- Check out Miami Vice. Stylish.

Freeze, turkey.

- Heh, heh. Whoa. Look out.
- Ethan's mom thought it'd be fun...

if we wear the same thing
that we wore to prom.

It's really cool that you two
are chaperoning the senior citizens prom.

Oh, senior pram.



I just gut that.

- So who's ready to party'?
- Grandma'?

- Yau lack...
- Hat.

Thank you, sweetie.
You lack a little surprised, dear.

- Can't a grandma get her groove an?
- I have no idea haw to answer that.

Okay, so, what do you think?

This is the exact same dress
I ware for my senior pram.

- It's a little 1981, isn't it?
- Yes, I know. That's the paint.

Mam, I bet it lacked great 30 years ago.

Grandma could loan you something
out of her closet.

Okay, maybe I should change.

Oh, no. I don't wanna miss the vote
for pram queen.

I'm the 3-in-1 favorite.
Let's drop it like it's hat.

- It's okay?
- Yes, yes. Goad night. Have fun, guys.



Okay, Jacuzzi Time Machine
starts in T-minus two minutes.

- I'll get the drinks.
- I'll get the popcorn.

Can I stay up late tonight?

If you promise not to tell your parents
we let you watch...

- ...Jacuzzi Time Machine.
- Deal.

[ANNOUNCER SPEAKING
INDISTINCTLY ON T\I_I

Hey, that's my spat.

What? I always sit beside Ethan
an movie night.

Oh, I get it. You two wanna canaadle.

Na, we don't.

As if. Canaadling is the absolute
last thing I wanna do.

Well, you know, not like
the last thing in the world.

All right.

[ROCK MUSIC PLAYING ON T\I_I

Whoa!

- Na!
- Na.

- Na, no, no.
- Na. Na.

I've really gotta work an my roof landings.

Rory. Ugh!

They just whirlpaaled into the '80s.
The leg warmers are all wet.

My favorite part is coming up.

- Haw do you know? It's all static.
- Because we're 92 minutes in.

He knows this movie off by heart.

- That's really pathetic.
- I'm so bored.

Hey, if you hadn't knocked out
the satellite dish...

we'd all be enjoying
Jacuzzi Time Machine right now.

You think Grandma's making out
with her boyfriend right new?

Oh, came an. Jane.

- Ew.
- Don't you have some cards'?

My parents might have some
old board games in the basement.

- Okay we've got Mathalot Village.
- Too much math.

- Ward Strike?
- Requires spelling.

Got anything
in a nice non-educational flavor?

Oh! Check this out. Spirit Speaker.

"Host a séance and make contact
with the spirit world."

New we're talking. Let's meet up
with some honeys from the other side.

What's a séance?

A ritual conducted to make contact
with spirits.

Dead spirits.
Those things give me the creeps.

- I thought they were banned from stares.
- This one lacks seriously old.

- I don't think we should mess with it.
- What's the big deal?

- It's just a board game.
- It's what it represents that scares me.

Came an. Just one little game?

Unless you're scared.

Jane and I are gonna go play dress-up.
Try not to make a mess.

Man, she has gotta loosen up.

Well, what do you say, girls,
for a little supernatural action?

- Are the dish towels really necessary'?
- Do you want this to work or not'?

Okay, did this at a sleepover once.

Everybody, two fingers
an their respective corners.

New all we have to do is just summon
a spirit and ask it a question.

I don't think we should mess with this.

We don't know who or what
is out there in the ether.

Lack, we're hanging out with vampires,
we've taken dawn zombies.

We pruned a haunted tree last month.

What's a little voice from beyond?

Paint taken.
But we're reading the rules first.

Fine, Mom.

Okay.

"Rule number one, never play alone."

Rule number two, always finish
your session by saying goodbye...

and waiting for
the spirit to leave the board.

Rule number three, do not remove fingers
from the board...

until the spirit's been dismissed.

"Failure to do so
can have catastrophic results."

- Ooh. Catastrophic results.
- Ooh!

- Benny, came an, this is serious.
- What? Okay.

Okay. "Rule number four, never ask is there
anyone out there who wants to talk to us..."

as such an open invitation
tends to attract evil entities."

- Gat it?
- Sweet.

All right, I'll Stan.

All right.

Oh, great séance board, are there any...

- ...friendly, gentle, preferably hat spirits...
- Hat.

Who'd like to hang with us dudes'?

Yes. Sweet.

- Now what?
- Ask it a question.

Right. Uh...

Are you a chick spirit?

Yes. A chick. Right an.

Ahem.

Will the world end in the year 2012
as the Mayans predicted?

"Ne"?

Darn it. Then we have to study
for my final exams.

Is there intelligent life an other planets?

She doesn't know.

Does she know what the Farce is?

Has she transcended
the space-time continuum?

Has she ever meta Borg?

"Are all three of you geeks?"

- Mm, pretty much, yeah.
- I've gut one.

Will we be coal?

No.

Nat even in college?

Ever?

Okay, this is lame.

I'm sure you were a hottie
when you had legs...

but you are officially dismissed,
Chiquita. Goodbye.

Thank you.

- Let's go get a snack.
- Good idea.

- Wait. Guys, came back.
- You're an your awn, dude.

We haven't talked
to any Babylonian babes yet.

Hey, what's up?
Is there anyone out there?

Rory, what did you do?

- Guys, what are you doing dawn there?
- Nothing.

- Tell me you did not play alone.
- Are you nuts?

I think there's somebody here.

Are you the hot-but-brutally-honest
ghost babe we recently conversed with?

No.

Didn't think so.

Okay. It's getting weird.

Uh, I think it's trying to tell us something.
But I don't know what.

- It may be another language.
- Yeah.

Yeah. Like evil speak.

Okay. I know it's not coal for a dude
to be freaked out...

but I am a freaked-cut dude right now.

You played alone.

Rory, it's the number one rule.
Never play alone!

Okay. Okay.

- What do we do?
- I don't know. It's going crazy.

Okay. Okay.
Let's all just put our hands an the board.

Right. You first.

- Why me?
- It was your idea.

Okay, together. On three. One. Two.

Three.

I think it worked.

Or we just really ticked it off.

It's trying to spell something. Lack.

"Hands off."

Hands off what? The board?

Yes. Yes. Yes. It said yes.

What do we do?

Take your hands off the board.

That's the number two rule.

"Do not take your hands off
unless the ghost says goodbye...

or it can escape the spirit realm."
But it told us to let go.

Of course. It's a ghost stuck
in the Netherlands, and it wants out.

- I think you mean netherwarld.
- Yep. That.

Ghosts in your bodies?

It's not in mine.

- I would definitely feel it if it was in mine.
- I don't feel any different.

Maybe it never left the board.

Grab that.

Okay.

Na more séances, ever.

I've gut no problem with tha... Whoa.

Hey. Sarah.

I don't know what your babysittefs done
to herself, but I like it.

Does anyone else think
that Sarah seems a little different?

No.

- Wh ca.
- O Kay.

Maybe I see what you're getting at.

- I've never seen a girl eat like that.
- Whoa.

Sarah, why don't we just...

Definitely not Sarah.
You thinking what I'm thinking?

The ghost that escaped
from the séance board?

- Found a body it liked.
- Can't say I blame it.

You gotta admit,
she lacks like more fun.

Yeah, if she wasn't trashing my house.

Oh, no. Na. Na. Nat the cake.
Please don't.

Please, my mom made that cake
for her book club tomorrow.

She researched recipes all week. Please.

I like her style.

Ethan, where's Sarah?

We think she's possessed by a ghost
from the Netherlands.

Rory. Heh. She's just getting
you guys a snack. Be right up.

I have gut to try that cake.

- Benny.
- What?

Not like your mom can feed it
to her book ladies now.

Okay. It's your cake. I get it.

Sarah. Sarah? Are you in there?

Stop. Stop, okay?

- Put dawn the trophy.
- Dude, it's just a bowling trophy.

Na. It's the only trophy
my dad has ever wan. Ever.

Okay, that's it. This party is aver.

I command you to return to the board
and go back to wherever you came from.

Big mistake.

Jane?

You all right?
Jane, are you okay?

Jane? Where are you, Jane?

R's emPIY-

Uh, guys, I think I know where she is.

- What the heck was that?
- A guess?

I'd say some demon
has taken aver Sarah's body.

This was a bad idea.
I told you a séance was a bad idea.

It was your idea.

Okay, new is not the time
to be throwing blame around, Ethan.

While we're an the topic,
I'm not the one who invited...

Casper the psycho ghost in.

- It was an accident.
- Okay. Let's assess.

We have an evil demon who's taken
possession of a fledgling Vampire's body...

who has trapped your little sister
inside your bedroom.

- Right.
- Right.

Well, then there's only one thing to do.

What's it doing?

It's changing my status.

Ta "Jamming with my babysitter
in my Star Trekjammies."

Burn. Yo.

Okay, we're not leaving
until you give me my sister back.

- What is this stuff?
- I don't know.

I feel so dirty.

No way. It's ectoplasm.

The physical manifestation
of paranormal energy.

- Cool.
- Cool.

Check this out.

It's an EMF app that I jury-rigged
to detect paranormal activity.

Whoa. These are some high readings
you gut here.

- Okay.
- Well, I'll be leaving now.

- Na.
- Na. We have to think this through.

What would the Ghastbusters do?

They used streams of lightning plasma to
suck ghosts into their containment boxes.

- Do we have any of that stuff'?
- No. All we have that sucks is a vacuum.

My dad has a leaf blower
that we could kick into reverse.

Nothing strong enough to hold
a spirit as nasty as this, though.

There is one thing I know that can
suck up spirits and hold them.

Once we suck the soul out,
we'll need a place to contain it.

The Cubile Animus?

Seriously? This is a really bad idea.

I mean, if a séance was bad...

this is a seriously, majorly,
messed-up bad idea.

Are you gonna help us or what?

Are you really sure
we should be doing this?

Huh?

My lucky Burg cube?

Oh, came an, my star projector?
That was a gift.

She better not throw my limited-edition
Heckbat Superflyer.

Dig.

Let's do this.

Okay, stop throwing my stuff!

Hey, Ethan, Why'd you just text me
one of your baby pictures?

Aww.

Oh! She just e-mailed this
to the entire school.

Oh, that's it.

This is an.

- Okay, I've secured the Cubile Animus.
- All right, let's get your little sister back.

Okay. Let her rip.

Ga again.

- Did you check the fuel?
- Yes, I checked.

I already told you twice I filled it up.

Maybe the couplings you made
for the tubing are malfunctioning.

Oh, here we go.
Sc everything I built is faulty?

- Everything you built is golden?
- You know, I don't like your tone.

- Oh, really?
- Yes, really.

You always get defensive whenever...

- Defensive? Defensive?
- Yes.

- You're pulling that card'?
- I am.

- You're really pulling it.
- Guys! Guys!

Did you try the power switch?

- Yeah.
- Oh, ha, ha!

- Nice going.
- All right. Let's go bag us a demon.

Hey, I like what you've done
with the place.

Those are some kind
of demonic symbols.

Is it wrong that I still think she's hat?

Okay.

You're gonna give me back my sister
and get in that board, or else!

Or else?

Or else, we're gonna take care of this
Whitechapel style.

Yeah, you tell them.

All right.

- Hat or not, let's waste this demon.
- Yeah, pull it.

Jane, run!

Came an.

Demon of the night,
get the heck into this leaf blower.

Keep sucking!

- H a-h a-h a!
- Whoo!

- Yeah.
- Oh, yeah! Take that.

- Teach you to came to my house.
- Exactly.

Ha, ha. Whoa.

Ow, my head. What happened?

- It was Rory's fault.
- It was Rory's fault.

I heard that.

- Hey, Mom. Hey, Dad.
- Hey, guys.

He'!-

Haw was the senior pram?

Well, it was a little slower
than I remember.

- Where's Grandma?
- The captain of the lawn bowling team...

taak her the Pancake Palace
for the midnight buffet.

Yeah, I don't know
where she gets her energy.

I'm going to bed.

- I'll be right up.
- Okay.

Sal understand you're the new president
of the Whitechapel Justin Bieber Fan Club.

- What'?
- Rory's parents were working...

the dessert table,
they showed us your status update.

Are you sure you wanna sign up
for figure skating?

Okay, Dad, thanks.

Nothing to worry about.

Okay. Goad night.

Justin Bieber? Really?

It wasn't me, remember?

- Did you take care of the Cubile Animus?
- Yeah. I hid it really well.

That thing is never gonna
bother us again.