Melrose Place (1992–1999): Season 4, Episode 29 - Melrose Unglued - full transcript

What the hell
is going on around here?

Word is spreading like
wildfire we've been hit
with a lawsuit.

No, not we--me.

I've been charged with

unlawful
sexual intercourse
with a minor,

otherwise known
as "Miss Tarzana."

What?

I mean, why?

Did you?

No, of course not.

Well, then how could
she do this?



I mean, there's
no proof, is there?

Apparently,
a maintenance man

saw the little tramp
having sex with somebody,
on the beach, no less.

And
he identified you?

No. He was too busy
getting a good look
at Brandi

to get a good look
at the guy that she was with,

clearing the way
for her lunatic mother

to claim
that it was me.

You know,
it's crazy, Michael.

You work hard,
you earn a reputation,

you build a practice...

Hey, we're gonna get
you out of this.

Now, these gold diggers
probably just want
hush money.

So if I pitch in, then--



Forget it.
This is my mess.

For your own sake,
stay clear.

There's no sense
in us both being dragged
through the mud.

At least let me
help you find an attorney.

Alycia's already
offered.

But, uh... thanks
for your support.

It means
the world to me.

[woman clearing throat]

Dr. Mancini,
you have a call on line two.

Thanks.
Excuse me, will you, pal?

Yeah? Mancini.

It's Brandi. I've been
trying to call you,

but Mom won't let me
out of her sight.

I want to explain.

Yeah, could you hold on
for a moment, please?

Listen,
I'm taking off.

I'm sorry
that this garbage

has to touch your life
like this.

I mean it.

Hey, your problems
are my problems, bud.

What the hell
are you trying to pull?

It's not my fault.
I really liked you.

It's my mother. She's...

I don't care
who's responsible.

Now, drop the charges,
Brandi.

I want to, but...

And, look,
you tell your mother

that if she doesn't
knock it off,

I'm going
to the cops.

That wouldn't be
very smart, Doctor.

Who the hell is this?

Because if you do
confess to the police,

not only will
your attorney
be hearing from me,

but so will your wife.

My wife?

Mm-hmm.

Michael and Kimberly
forever.

Oh, a nice sentiment.

But I don't think
that would be true

if she found out
you slept with

a 17-year-old girl
last week.

Oh, my God,
you have my ring.

You know,
if I were you,

I'd let my partner
take the fall for this one.

He doesn't have
nearly as much to lose.

[rock song plays]

♪ If I was in love ♪

♪ Or I had lots of money ♪

♪ With all of it spent ♪

♪ Most everyday ♪

♪ But I'm lead to believe ♪

♪ That there's more
out my window ♪

♪ More out my window ♪

♪ Than all in my,
all in my head ♪

♪ It's all in my head ♪

♪ ♪

♪ Is it all in my head ♪

♪ It's all in my head ♪

♪ ♪

♪ All in my head ♪

♪ ♪

♪ So maybe I'll take ♪

♪ Some time and think it over ♪

♪ Maybe I'll take
the rest of my life ♪

♪ Because I've had
all the toys ♪

♪ And it's time
for the real thing ♪

♪ The real thing is calling ♪

Hey! How about this?

"Management trainee.
$60,000 a year.

Benefits. Paid vacation.
Just send resume."

Sydney, I got
a job, remember?

Yes. But not
a career.

And I'm happy with it.
No more classifieds.

[knock on door]

Yes?

I understand Bobby Parezi's
staying here...

Lucky man that he is.

And you are?

Jimmy Stanley.

Movie producer.

Well, come on in.

Hey hey hey!

Look, Jimmy.

I don't know
how you tracked me down,

but whatever you're
peddling, I'm not buying.

Come on, now, Bobby,
I don't blame you
for being leery,

but I'm not like
I used to be
when we were kids.

These days,
I'm completely legit.

A real movie
producer, huh?

In fact,
for not a lot of money,
I can get my oldest buddy

in on the ground floor
of my next flick.

Domestic and foreign
distribution is already
lined up.

Video rights, too.

All of which
are probably illegal.

Well, why don't you
lose my address

and get your ass
outta here.

Well, Bobby, at least
hear the man out.

Trust me, it's a scam.
It always is with this guy.

I wouldn't have come
here if it wasn't
the real thing.

I'm staying at
the Sunset Plaza Hotel.

Just think about it, O.K.?

Call me.
I can get you in
for a measly 15 grand.

Does the phrase
"golden opportunity"

mean anything to you?

Ha ha. No.

[door slams]

Excuse me.
There's this thing
called knocking.

Well, I knew you were up.

And, besides, I brought
you a latte

in exchange for two
minutes of your time.

So I'm pitching online bank
the day after tomorrow--

A little late
to be doing your
homework, isn't it?

I happen to work best
under pressure.

But, for some reason,
you still need my help.

What's the matter,
you couldn't
sweet-talk

your pillow partner
into sharing
information?

Well, Amanda and I
aren't exactly close.

Seems her interest
in me was...limited.

Yeah, to renewing
her contract.

Ah, well, you've got
to give her credit

for equal opportunity
back stabbing.

So, do you know anything
about online bank, or not?

Only that they're
interested in facts
and figures,

not catchy,
off-the-cuff slogans.

If I were you, I'd
reschedule for a time when
I was better prepared.

Ah, spoken like somebody
who flips burgers
for a living.

Far be it from me
to give

God's gift to advertising
any advice,

but you'd better
patch things up
with Amanda

at least long enough
to get her online bank files,

because without
those numbers, you are dead.

That's swell, Alison.
Thanks.

Have a nice
minimum wage day.

[door slams]

WOMAN ON P.A.:
Dr. Burns, here's
a message for you.

Peter.

Please. I just want
to apologize.

I'm on my way to see
a candidate for
a heart transplant,

something you should
look into one day.

I'll admit,
I didn't handle
things well

when that woman
showed up
at your door.

You practically accused me
of statutory rape.

All right, I doubted
you, but only
for a moment.

I'm sorry.

Apology accepted.
You feel better?

I want to be here
for you, the way

you've always
been there for me.

And it only took you
a half day to come
to that conclusion.

What are you
gonna do?

My attorney's advised me
to settle.

Well, I don't know what kind
of attorney you have,

but, whoever it is,
they don't know you.

You've always stood up
for what you believe in.

It's Alycia,
and at this point

I have more
confidence in her
than in you.

Is "settle" the only word
that comes out of
her big mouth?

She was Bobby's attorney, too,
and look where he ended up.

You're innocent, Peter.

You should be fighting this,
not caving in.

Do you honestly believe
that I am innocent?

Yes. Without question.

I needed you
the other night.

Peter...

You got everything?

Yeah, I think so.

Listen, Jo, thanks a lot
for the lift

and the hundred
other things you've
done for us.

It's been
a really big help.

Hey, it's my pleasure.

Well, I guess I better
go get Tyler settled in.

Laurie, you sure you don't
want me to watch him
for a couple of days?

I mean, our place
isn't furnished yet,
is it?

No, but we've slept
on plenty of floors before.

Don't worry.
We'll be fine.

I'll give you
a call, O.K.?

Laurie, wait...

the other day
when I was giving
Tyler a bath,

I noticed a big bruise
on his back,

and I was wondering
if you knew how he
could have gotten it.

No idea,
but he's a little boy.

You know, they're always
bumping into something.

Hey, Tyler, say good-bye
to Jo, honey.

Isn't she coming
with us?

No, she's got
her own place now.
Say good-bye.

Bye, Jo.
Bye, Tyler.

[knock on door]

Sorry for showing up
unannounced.

That's O.K.
What can I do for you?

Be at the office
once in a while.

Look, I know
it's inconvenient,

but I'm really more productive
designing at home.

Well, you can't
avoid me forever,
Jane,

especially when
we have the biggest
retailer

on the east coast
wanting to do
business with us.

Who?

Humphries.
70 stores, 10 states.

Are you serious?

I set a meeting
with them.

Oh, my God, that's fantastic.
When are they coming in?

They're not.
We're flying out.

The day after tomorrow,
we're in Manhattan.

Richard, I am not
exactly ready for
an out-of-town trip.

I mean, I'm grateful
you made all this happen,

but can't you handle this
on your own?

Well, they want to meet you.
You're the designer.

Jane, why are you being
resistant towards this?

I don't know.

You know, traveling together,
it just doesn't seem right.

We'll stay in
different hotels.

We'll only see
each other during
the meetings.

Hell, we'll take
different flights,

if that's
what you want.

Jane, we're talking
about a $1 million
account here.

That's my only agenda,
and, frankly, it ought
to be yours, too.

You're right.
I'll go.

Great. I'll make
the reservations
right now.

Richard, there's
no confusion about
our arrangement, is there?

Absolutely not.

Good.

Yes. I'd like to make
some travel arrangements.

For two.

Well, I got to admit,
I was surprised
to hear from you.

Bobby wasn't too
receptive to my offer
this morning.

Well, you know Bobby.

He just likes to play
hard to get.

Are you saying he sent you
to test the waters?

Well, he didn't
exactly send me,

but if your film
is what you say it is,
legitimate,

then I think Bobby
could be persuaded.

Put it this way--

I've made 10 small-budget
films.

Each has grossed
over a million.

It doesn't get more legitimate
than that, sweetheart.

Look...
I wasn't born yesterday.

How much did they net?

$950,000.

Well!

How much do
I need to write
the check out for?

I mean, how much
do we need to invest

to get the ball
rolling?

Well, $15,000 gets you
a return of 75.

And, since you're
a friend of a friend,

I'll sweeten the deal.

I'll put you both on
as producers.

With the screen credit

at the beginning
of the film?

O.K. We have a deal.

Okay.

$15,000.

Oh! And FYI...

my name should go
before Bobby's.

Alphabetical order.

"Burns/Mancini."

What the hell is that?

A corporation.
My corporation.

It's a loan-out thing,
you know?

Everybody in L.A.
has one.

Welcome to show-biz, kid.

Matt! I need to talk
to you about something.

Sure, what's up?

Remember the people
that were staying
with me,

a woman and her son?

Yeah, I saw them
a couple of times. Why?

Well,
I'm not positive,

but I think it
might be an abusive
situation.

I mean, she's this
young mother, you know,

a little wild...
kind of a short fuse.

I was wondering
if you knew an agency
I can call,

or maybe I should
just I call the cops.

Well, well, just wait.
Hold up here.

What are you basing this on?

I mean, some incidents,
some injuries?

Well, yeah.
I saw her shake
him once.

And I found a bruise
on Tyler's back
the other day.

When I asked Laurie
about it, she like
brushed me off.

She said something
ridiculous about
"boys will be boys."

Okay, look, Jo...

What? You want me
to drop it?

No, no, no, it's just
that a false accusation

could be as harmful
as a real case of abuse, okay?

Maybe you should talk
to an expert before
jumping to any conclusions.

Oh, an expert.
Yeah, great.

Hmm. Where should
I find one,
the Yellow Pages?

Matt, I think Tyler
is in danger,
so time is crucial.

Isn't there someone
that you know
at the hospital?

Well, actually,
one of my professors

wrote a paper
on the subject.

Maybe I can get
a referral.

When can I meet him?

I'm one of 20 students.

Jo, the guy
barely knows me.

Just introduce me.
I will take care
of the rest.

Please? When's
your next class?

Ooh!

Pipin' hot chicken soup.
This'll fix you right up.

Sounds great.

Yeah.
There we go!

Oh.

Hey, what's this?

Um, it's just some material
I'm reading for work.

You were supposed
to be resting,
young lady.

And aren't these
"Sybil" cases
out of your league?

I mean, those people
are way too far gone
for ordinary therapy.

Well, I don't know.

I mean, I think
that if someone is
made aware of the problem,

and if they're willing
to work through it,
then I think that--

Nothing short of
a permanent stay
in a nut house

can help them.

Now, open up.

Here it comes.

So, um...

W-w-what's, um, what's going on
with this Miss Tarzana thing?

Uh...

Hmm.

Why do you ask?

Well, it affects you, too,
doesn't it?

You are Peter's partner.

Yeah.

It's--it's pretty bad.

Those women
are filing suit.

They'll probably
take Peter
for all he's worth.

I guess even smart
people can have
messed up lives.

Look, Kimberly, I've got
to tell you something.

I do, too.

That's fine, fine,
but me first, okay?

Okay...

I know that
I am not perfect.

But I love you,
damn it,

more than you
can imagine.

So if we could just
find it in our hearts

to forgive...
Yes...

If we can both forgive,

then we can get through
anything, can't we?

That's right.

And we won't
lose each other.

No matter what.

No matter what.

If you're looking
for Jane,

she's working
at home today.

Yeah. I know that.

I came here to see you.

Let me guess.

This is where you lay
the Cro-Magnon speech
on me, right?

"Me Jake. Jane mine."

Right?

That's kind of a nasty attitude
toward someone

who kept you in business
with Jane.

So what are you saying,
I owe you something?

Just a little respect.

Jane and I are a couple.

We're not breaking up
anytime soon.

Understood?
Sure.

Everybody deserves
a warm body at night.

But you know, Jake,
sooner or later,
Jane is gonna need

some intellectual
stimulation.

And, when that happens,

where's that
gonna leave you?

I'm on to you,
smart-ass.

You go anywhere
near Jane,

you mess with
her head at all,

and we'll take that
pretty-boy face
of yours,

and we'll pound it
into the dirt.

You got that?

Yes, sir.

[rock song plays]

You really like
this guy.

Yeah. Though I'd like him
even more

if he would realize
his untapped potential.

Doesn't sound anything
like my ex.

He had no potential.
Just great abs.

Yeah, well, abs or no abs,
Tony always was bad news.

I don't know how you ever
put up with that temper of his.

Want some?

No, thank you.

You have ketchup
all over your face.

Boy, I could never do
the single mom thing.

Well, I love
my little guy.

Though it's kind of
a drag sometimes.

Thank God for Jo.
She's been really,
really great.

She's taken him
to the movies
and to the park.

Working off
that guilt of hers.

You know,
she had a kid...

until she murdered
his drug-dealing father

and then his parents
sued for custody.

Bottom line, she had
to give it up for adoption.

She's been kind of weird
ever since.

Man. That is ugly.

And Jo seems
so together.

Nah. She always was too
"holier than thou"

for my taste.

Hey! Do you wanna split
a banana split with me?

Yeah!

High 5.

All right!

Eww. Kids are kind of
sticky, aren't they?

What is taking this guy
so long?

Didn't your class end
10 minutes ago?

Dr. O'Malley's
fairly popular,

especially with
the female students.

Good night,
Dr. O'Malley!

Yeah, that's him.
Dr. O'Malley!

I'm Matt Fielding.
I'm one of your
third-year students.

Second row,
third seat.
B-plus average.

Wow. You're kidding.

Don't pat yourself
on the back so much,
Fielding.

You still gotta
hit the books.

Right, I'm sure.
Matt...

Yes, um, Dr. O'Malley,
this is Jo Reynolds.

She's a friend of mine.

Hi. Matt said that you
could offer me some guidance

in a possible
child abuse situation.

I told her you were
one of the experts
in the field.

Well, I'm not in the business
of giving free advice,

but since you're
a friend of Fielding's,

you got the time
it takes me
to get to my car.

[scoffs]

WOMAN ON P.A.:
Medical student Adrian King
to Psych Services.

And when I asked the mother
about the bruise,
she was evasive.

She just gave me,
you know, the "boys
will be boys" speech.

Tell me, Miss Reynolds,
what exactly is your connection

with Tyler and his mother?

Well, we're not related,
if that's what
you're asking.

Tyler's mother
is a friend of
an acquaintance.

And you've known them
how long?

Less than a week.

I see.

So, a 4-year-old
that you hardly know

has a bruise on his back,

and based on that
you've come to arguably

the most well-respected
expert in the field
of child abuse.

Don't you think you may have
skipped a few levels?

I may not have a lot
of proof, Doctor,

but I trust
my instincts.

And I was just hoping
that you'd be able
to give me insight.

Insight number one--

you watch too much
daytime television.

Okay, if you're too big
an expert to help me,
that's fine,

but, for the record,
I believe a child's life
is at stake.

Miss Reynolds, wait.

If it makes you
feel better,

bring Tyler into my office.

I'll have a talk with him.

I'll do that.

Just try to be less
of a jerk with him

than you were with me.

Well, this
is ridiculous.

I'm not waiting here
a minute longer.

Sorry we're late.
Medical emergency.

Oh, well, don't tell me.

Dr. Burns was practicing
his bedside manner

on a 14-year-old.

Don't push me,
lady.

Peter, this is
Danielle Sanderson.

She's representing Mrs. Carson
and her daughter.

Oh, hi.
What's it like to
represent Satan's bride?

I told you this
was a bad idea.

Look, this will go
a whole lot smoother

if we can keep
the personal attacks
to a minimum.

Will you please just
let me handle this?

As you can see
in the documents,

Dr. Burns denies
any involvement,
sexually or otherwise,

with the plaintiff.

However, in the interest
of all parties involved,

he's decided to offer
Brandi $200,000

in a settlement of any
and all litigation
against him

in this matter.

There she is,
Miss Extortion 1996!

$200,000 isn't
nearly enough

to make up
for what this
pedophile

did to my daughter.

I didn't sleep
with your daughter!

We're prepared
to accept the offer,

provided we receive
a lump sum payment
within 24 hours.

We've anticipated
your needs.

Peter!
I can't do this.

You have to!

This is blackmail,
Michael!

If you don't give us,
that money, I'll..

What?
No, go ahead.

You'll what?
Take me to court? Fine.

You wanna take
the gloves off,
honey? Let's go.

Because you don't have
one ounce of proof

that I slept with
your nympho daughter!

And for your
information,

I don't find her or you
even remotely attractive.

You son of a bitch!

[Alycia]
Just get a grip.

Sorry, Alycia,

but my integrity
is not for sale.

Peter!

Dr. Burns is obviously
too upset to proceed,

but I'm very confident
that we can come to terms

once he calms down.

Um, yeah, I'll
prescribe some valium.
He'll be fine.

Well, he damn well
better proceed.

Because each day
I don't get a check,

the price goes up
$100,000.

Come on, honey.

That woman's gonna
eat your partner alive.

Unless whoever slept
with that little girl
on the beach comes forward,

I suggest you look
for a new practice
to join.

I can't believe
I let you talk me

into that second
bottle of wine.

What better way
to celebrate $1 million
in new orders?

We make a hell
of a team, don't we?

Yeah, I guess,
but I dreaded
this trip.

Obviously,
we work well
together.

And I have to admit,
you've been
a real gentleman.

That's the first compliment
you've paid me in months.

[telephone rings]

Hello.

You're there!

Hi, hon!

You wouldn't believe the day
Richard and I had!

We could do no wrong.

They bought everything
we presented.
It was amazing!

Sounds like you've
been celebrating.

Yeah, we have, we've
done a little of that.

But I miss you.

It's funny how you
supposedly can't
stand the guy,

and now you're kicking back
champagne with him
at 1:00 in the morning.

Actually, it was
white wine.

Jake, why are you
acting like I've done
something's wrong?

I'm not,
I'm just saying.

I had the biggest
sales day of my life,

and you're giving me
grief for having
a couple of drinks?

Well, I'll save
my congratulations
until you're sober.

So...good-bye, uh...

Give my best
to your drinking buddy.

Actually, Richard's
right here.

Why don't you tell
him yourself?

Oh.

Does that mean you don't
have any clothes on?

Oh, Jake,
go to hell!

Since when do you
drink on the job?

Since my girlfriend decided
to get drunk in a hotel room

with her ex.

Oh, Jake,
I'm sure it's not
what you think.

Jane would never do
anything to hurt her
relationship with you.

She loves you.

Yeah, but she needs
Richard.

I can't believe him.

He doesn't trust me.

He just doesn't
trust me!

I mean...

This really has
upset you, hasn't it?

Yeah, I thought Jake
was different...

or at least
that he knew me.

I think that
you deserve better.

I mean, you ruined
my entire career,

and I can still find it
in my heart to trust you.

Richard,
don't do that!

I'm serious.

I really think
that you deserve
someone better.

Richard,
let go of me.

I can't.

Richard, stop!
Stop it!

Ow! Richard, what are
you doing? Get off of me!

You know how good
we are together.

How do you expect me
to let go of that, huh?

Stop it!
Stop it!

Help!

Richard!

Shut up!

Quit pretending that
you don't want it.

[grunting]

Richard! Aah!
Help!

Richard!

[muffled sobbing]

We have
to be downtown
in 10 minutes.

How'd you get
in here?

Ordered room
service, came in
with the waiter.

Get out.
Get out, now!

Why are you
being so hostile?

You raped me!

I did not.

We made love,
don't you remember?

Just like in
the old days.

Get your hands off me.
You're sick.

I'm calling the police!

But you haven't
called them yet.

You wanna know why?

'Cause nobody will
believe that it
was rape, Jane.

You were
drinking with me.

You invited me into
your hotel room.

You had a fight with
your little boyfriend.

It's only natural
that you would turn
to me physically.

So believable.

You bastard!

Get out!

I'll see you
in the lobby
in 10 minutes.

Don't keep
the customers
waiting.

[Laurie]
what did you think?

Who's gonna
clean it up?

Hi.

Jo! Hi.

What a surprise.

Come on in.

I see you've
settled in.

Yeah, I'm sorry
about the mess.

But Tyler's been
a bad boy today.

He raided the fridge
and left food
everywhere.

It's gonna take me forever
to clean up this mess.

Laurie, this shirt
is filthy.

Well, I'm teaching
him a lesson.

If he messes up
his clothes,

he has to wear them,
right, Tyler?

Mommy's mad.

I don't like it
when she's mad.

So, Jo,

why'd you come here?

I just dropped by
to say hello,

see how things
were going.

Well,
everything's great.

I even have
been out on some
job interviews.

Really? So who watches Tyler
when you're gone?

Oh, the girl next door.

She's an exotic dancer
and works nights, mostly.

Are you serious?
You trust someone
like that?

Well, why shouldn't I?

She's nice,
and I know where
she lives.

And she's cheap.

Well, the next time
you need a sitter,
call me.

I don't think a stripper
is the appropriate
babysitter for Tyler.

You know what, Jo,

I need someone
when I need someone.

So unless you plan
on being available
at a moment's notice--

For Tyler,
I would be.

Fine.

I have an interview
later today.

I'll be here.

Just get your resume together
and send it to my attention.

I'm Senior VP
of National
Accounts,

and I like
getting people
into the game.

It's quite
lucrative.

Billy Campbell?

Present and
accounted for.

Ronald Marks,
president, Online Bank.

Got the entire management
team assembled.

I'm very excited to hear
what you have to say.

Let's do it.

Where's all
your materials?

My materials?

I have the whole
dog and pony show
right up here.

All right, kiddo,

why don't you
go have a seat

while I talk to Jo
for a minute, okay?

Man on P.A.:
Dr. Taylor to
pediatric northwest,

room one.

Dr. Taylor to pediatric...

He gave me
a lollipop.

Well, that's 'cause
you're such a good boy.

Well?

I examined him.

What can I tell you?
It's your basic bruise.

What is that,
a technical term?

You can't tell
what caused it?

The boy has no physical
symptoms of child abuse.

I had a nice chat
with him,

and he has a normal
and healthy attitude
towards his mother.

This is good news, Jo.

No, it's not.
It's no news.

It doesn't erase
the possibility

that there could be
a problem.

I've seen more
child abuse cases
than anyone I know.

And I'm telling you,
there is nothing to indicate

that that boy's
been abused by his mother.

I don't care how many
cases you've seen.

You can't talk with
a boy for 10 minutes

and make that judgment.

Look, I did what
I said I was gonna do.

Now, you wanna keep obsessing
about this, go right ahead,

but, personally, I think
you should find another
outlet for all this passion.

You know,
maybe find a guy.

Settle down,
start your own family.

You are
a sexist bastard.

I care about this boy!

I don't want anything
to happen to him.

Damn right,
I'm passionate
about it!

If you're not,
maybe you're in
the wrong line of work.

Come on, Tyler,
let's go.

Come on.

Nice to see you again.

Tsk, tsk, tsk.
No, no, no, Kimberly.

I don't want you
taking those.

Oh, Peter wants me to.

[rock music playing]

Oh! Where do you think
you're going?

It is now 7:30.

Our appointment was
for 7:00.

I have a man waiting
for me at home,
you know.

Yeah, and he's not
on the lease.

Oh, no need--
we'll be buying a house
together, I'm sure,

in the near future.

Do you have
the information
I wanted or not?

Only if you have
the cash.

$200.

Should have
charged you more.

Took me forever.

20 phone calls
to find a paralegal
with loose lips.

The she-devil and her mother
are staying at the Century
Plaza, room 387.

Thank you very much.

What, exactly,
are you gonna do
with that information?

Pay them a visit.

Oh, and, Sydney,

that $200 also bought
your silence.

So...not a word
to Peter.

You're welcome.

Go away.

Online Man,
superhero of banking?

The clients are still
laughing, Billy.

Well, they're idiots.
They don't get it.
All right?

They have no idea
about what's
here and now.

They came up with
this year's most revolutionary
concept in banking.

They are the here and now!

So aren't you interested
in what our bosses had to say

about your
little performance?

Not really. I'm sure
they don't expect me

to have a perfect
batting average.

You're off the account.
I'm on.

So much for
your Midas touch.

I could get them
back, you know,
if I wanted to,

but it's a stupid
account.

Nobody's gonna bank
on a PC unless it
spits out twenties.

Well, that rationalization
may make you feel better,

but I wouldn't count
on getting a raise
anytime soon.

Amanda.

Hello. What can
I get you?

Nothing.

Thanks to Billy,

I'm totally satisfied.

Good night.

What was that about?

You really
want to know?

Uh...

No. Actually, I'd really
rather just take your order.

Another beer?

No, I don't need
a damn thing at all.

Not from you...

or anybody.

Thank God you're here!

How did you
get in here?

Well, the door was open.

I'm not surprised.
Sydney was supposed
to lock up.

Kimberly, now, look,
I'm in a crappy mood.

My life is ruined,
and I don't feel
like socializing.

Peter... Peter,
I'm hearing voices again.

It's not like
Henry this time.
I can't make them stop.

Please, you've
gotta do something.

All right,
all right, slow down.

Michael's starting to suspect
that something's wrong.

And if he finds out,
I'll lose him,
I know I will!

Please help me.
Kimberly, listen to me.

I'm gonna
take care of you.

Now, we're
gonna go inside
and we're gonna talk

and we're gonna
figure out what to do.

Just calm down.
Take a deep breath.

Oh, God, Peter,
thank you.

Thank you.
[door opens]

Dr. Peter Burns?

What's this all about?

You're under arrest.

For what?

Unlawful sexual
intercourse,

contributing to
the delinquency
of a minor.

No, please,
he's my doctor!

He promised to help me.
Please, you can't
take him!

Ma'am, you're interfering
with police business.

Please stand back.

Kimberly, it'll be
all right.

Call Dr. Turner.
Have him check you in.

I'll call when I can.

Peter!

I can't do this alone.

I can't.

[phone ringing]

Try wife number 2.

Syd, look, I can't
talk right now.

I gotta leave
the phone lines open.

Kimberly didn't come
come home last night.

Oh, I can top that.

Peter's been arrested
for doing a minor.

Arrested? You mean
as in, behind bars?

Yes, so you'd better
get into the office.

You're the only one
going in today.

Remember,
I'm taking the day off?

Those witches.

Laurie!

How dare you take
my son to see a doctor

without my permission?

I'm sorry. It was
out of concern.

I don't give a damn
about your concern.

Tyler is my son.

And there's
nothing wrong with him.

I happen to be
a very good mother,
unlike you.

What?

Oh, yeah.

Syd told me all about
how you gave away
your baby

right after
you blew away his father.

I mean, who are you
to judge me, Jo?

This isn't about
judging you, Laurie.

This is about you
getting you help.

No. You're the one
with the problem.

You're obsessed
with my son,

and I don't like it,
or you.

So just stay the hell
away from us,
understood?

I stopped loving you
and you ended up dead.

Maybe I've tried
to make up for that

by keeping you alive...

by becoming all the things
that I thought you were.

Good-bye, Brooke.

Hello.

Good morning.

Sydney!

What are
you doing here?

Well, it's the first day
of production.
I'm producing.

Where's my chair?
Look, you shouldn't
be here.

The actors prefer
to have only one

producer on the set
at a time.

So why don't you go
on home,

and I'll call you
when we wrap.

Oh, I don't think so.

I've got some notes
on the script.

Are you aware that
some of these scenes
have no endings?

For instance,
this one right here

where the cop helps
the woman who's been
burglarized.

After he checks
her bedroom,

the scene just stops.

The director likes
the actors to improvise.

It keeps it fresher,
like a Woody Allen film.

I'll explain it
sometime.

Our deal says
I get script approval.

And I don't approve.

Rolling.

Stop the cameras.

Shh. Don't speak.

And action.

Guess I scared
them off, ma'am.

Well, what would
you have done if you
caught the burglar?

I would have
told him, "You're
under arrest.

Put your arms
above your head
and spread 'em."

Like this?

Oh, my God.
I'm a porno producer.

Cut!

[banging]

Brandi, open up!
I know you're in there!

Mikey.
So good to see you.

No, no, no.
Stop it, O.K.?

You know I can't keep
my hands off of you.

Well, you're gonna have
to try, 'cause we gotta talk.

Now, I want you
and your mother
to come clean.

I'm not gonna let you
do this, Betsy.

I am not gonna
let you win.

I'm not gonna let you
take control.

[sighs]

Kimberly?

You here, honey?

I saw
your car outside.

There's something
I gotta talk to
you about,

if you don't
know already.

Guess what.

Betsy won.

[knocks on door]

Hey, I saw your light on.
When did you get home?

Uh, a few hours ago.

Look, Jake,
I'm really tired.
Can we talk later?

Come no, you're not still
mad at me, are you?

No, I-I don't want
to get into it.

Look, I probably shouldn't
have said what I said
on the phone,

but you had Richard
in your hotel room
and you were drunk.

I got jealous, all right?
I'm sorry.

Jake, I asked
you to stop.

I expect you to stop.

Stop what?

Leave me alone.
Just go away!

Jane,
what's gotten into you?

Why are you
acting like this?
I'm sick of it!

Okay? I'm sick of you,
I'm sick of all of you!