Mail Call (2002–…): Season 4, Episode 12 - Fast Attack Submarine - full transcript

- Knock off the jaw jacking.

It's time for Mail Call.

Welcome to Mail Call.

You know, a couple
of days ago, I

traded in the old
Jeep for something

with a little more horsepower--

the Navy's Mark 5
special operations craft.

I took a joy ride
on this battle boat

to answer an email from Nick
in Coronado, California.

Nick wants to know how fast
this little dingy can go

and what kind of
lead it delivers.



Speed is life during combat, and
the Mark 5 special operations

craft has it in spades.

It looks like a
gunmetal gray version

of racers that blast around
every shoreline in America.

But the Mark 5
isn't built for fun.

It is the Navy's
fastest water craft

and it is armed to the teeth.

To get a closer look, I signed
on for the day with Special

Boat Team 12 at Naval Special
Warfare Command in San Diego.

Petty Officer Mike Thompson
is the head honcho,

and he gave me the
scuttlebutt on the Mark 5.

All right, basically what we
have here is an 82-foot Naval

Special Warfare Craft,
which is called the Mark 5.

We're capable of doing
in excess of 45 knots.



For a craft of this
size and for the weight,

the craft weighs 54
and 1/2 long tons.

For something like that to go
50 knots, it's just incredible.

LEE ERMEY: The Mark 5 and
the special boat teams

that use this baby are on the
cutting edge of 21st century

battle tech.

But the tactical need for a
high-speed craft like this one

goes back to the
brown-water Navy in Vietnam.

To provide cover during
close-in shore operations,

the Navy created Special
Boat Unit 1 in 1964.

These days, our boats have
gotten beefier and a hell

of a lot more lethal.

But the mission
remains the same.

We do direct action missions.

And what that involves is we
do maritime interdiction ops.

When craft are smuggling oil,
we may board them or have

other agencies board them.

LEE ERMEY: And with this kind
of speed, the bad guys can run,

but they can't hide.

When we're looking for a high
value target, maybe someone

that's trying to get
away from somebody,

they may be on a
craft somewhere.

And again, we'll have
to board that craft.

LEE ERMEY: Speed is only
half the story here.

The Mark 5 is a
cool little brother

to get special ops
where they need to go,

when they need to get there.

We're this close to the boat.

Let's talk about it, touch it,
feel it, and see what it does.

What we got here is a Zodiac
with a 55 horsepower outboard

on there, capable of carrying
up to eight personnel

to and from the beach.

And it gets on the boat safely.

LEE ERMEY: As cool
as this machine is,

it's just a boat until
you put guns on it.

Then it becomes a weapon.

And I just had to
get a closer look.

What about these weapons?

My god, they're awesome.

We got a twin .50 caliber.

That's right.

Max range on this is
about five nautical miles.

That's a long range for
it to be shooting things.

Effectively like to shoot
things within a mile or less

is what we'll be shooting
at, about 2,000 yards.

It's a pretty good weapon.

There's a lot of
capabilities of it.

We also have a
lot of attachments

that we've put on here.

LEE ERMEY: Damn right the
.50 caliber is a good weapon.

And by adding a thermal imaging
or a night vision scope,

the good old .50 is even
more of a heartbreaker.

And that's not all
they've got going.

So Mike, tell me about
this little baby.

What we got here, Gunny, is a
40 mike-mike grenade launcher.

This thing is capable of
shooting up to 2,200 meters.

It has a kill radius of 5
meters and a frag of 15.

LEE ERMEY: If you
ain't a friendly,

you're not even going
to know what hit you.

I always heard that
this boat generally

operates at nighttime.

Our best op is in
the middle of darkness.

We don't run with nav lights.

We have a very strict
policy on light discipline

inside the craft.

If someone can see
a light on board,

then that means the enemy is
going to be able to see us.

All right, Gunny,
now that I showed you

a little bit of the stuff that's
on the back deck, how about

we take inside and look
at all the good stuff

inside the cockpit?

Yeah, that's
what I want to do.

The boat captain, the navigator,
the engineer, and the gunners

are all that's needed to take
SEALs into and out of the worst

kind of hell.

And talk about sparse
accommodations.

There's no bunks,
not even a head.

Maybe that's why
they're in such a hurry.

All right, we've seen the
Mark 5 from stem to stern.

We've seen the entire package.

Now let's rock and roll.

Let's get underway.

Yes.

The Mark 5s always
work in pairs.

That way one boat
can provide cover

while the other one sweeps
in to complete the mission.

Now that we're moving, I
can't wait to put this baby

through its paces.

It's time to really wind her up
and see what kind of maneuvers

go into a beach assault.

[radio]:: You ready
to drop the hammer?

Roger, [inaudible].

OK, we're talking about
dropping the hammer.

I imagine that probably
means that they

want to go a little faster.

Yeah, that's exactly
what they mean.

The Mark 5 is a
well-built machine.

It has to be when you're
taking turns like this

and coming to a dead stop
from 50 miles an hour.

But this is just business
as usual when the heat's on.

Now, I'm not just a speed freak.

I also wanted to hitch a ride
in the Mark 5's Zodiac boat,

so the boys showed me how
they launch and recover

the little boat that
delivers a big ride.

Pretty neat little vessel.

Got a 55 horsepower
motor, and as you see,

this little baby could
really click right along,

really move out.

The Mark 5 is specifically
designed to let the Zodiac ride

right up into the stern.

The Mark 5 also
has a global reach.

Mike and his crew can
tear down the boat,

load it up into an aircraft,
and deliver a world

of hurt anywhere on the globe.

Now, that's what I call a
lot of bang for your buck.

Hoo yah!

Special Boat Team Number
12, getting our boys

on and off the beach in a hurry.

Mark 5 rules.

Oorah!

The Mark 5 is the fastest
boat in the Navy's fleet.

But Joyce in
Birmingham, Alabama,

wants to know, what was
America's very first gunboat?

Well, for that
answer, we're going

to have to turn back the Mail
Call calendar more than 200

years.

In 1776, big honking
ships with giant cannons

pretty much put the kibosh on
any kind of sneaky fast attack.

So figuring out how to launch
a quick, deadly gunboat

was something our founding
fathers were scratching

their heads about.

And here's what
they came up with.

The gunboat Philadelphia
isn't exactly a Mark 5.

But it's based on
the same idea--

a small craft with a
small crew and a big gun.

The Philadelphia was one of
a fleet of 15 identical boats

that saw service as the end
of the Revolutionary War.

And they all sank.

But the Philadelphia was
salvaged from the bottom

of Lake Champlain in 1935.

And the cold water preserved
her pretty darn good.

So because she's still
around at the Smithsonian,

we'll give the gunboat
Philadelphia the title

America's first gunboat.

The Philadelphia sank
into Lake Champlain

during the Battle of
Valcour Island in 1776,

after the tiny gunboat fleet was
overrun by bigger ready ships.

But her commander survived
to fight another day,

and to become America's
most famous traitor.

His name was Benedict Arnold.

Colin in Provo, Utah
shot me an email

asking me to tell him all
about German Fallschirmjaeger.

Guess how many takes it
took me to get that right?

We're talking about
German paratroopers here

and what kind of
gear earned them

the title "first in combat."

As the German blitzkrieg
went rolling over Europe,

it was the German paratroopers
known as the Fallschirmjaeger

who really stole the show.

From May of 1940 to May of 1941,
there was no stopping them.

The good guys didn't
even know what

hit them until it was too late.

The Germans were the first
country to use paratroops

as a weapon successfully.

LEE ERMEY: Their combat gear
was as high-speed as it got.

Every piece of
clothing and equipment

was custom-made for the
airborne storm trooper,

starting with the jump helmet.

HARLAN GLENN: It was
specially designed

and conducive for jumping
out of an airplane.

They basically
cut down the sides

and redesigned a special chin
strap to give the paratrooper

more support, especially on the
opening shock of the parachute.

The German paratrooper
helmet had a special liner

that was specially
reinforced, again,

to protect the paratrooper on
landing should he hit his head

on the ground or on a tree.

LEE ERMEY: Next on the gear list
is what they called the bone

sack, because it held everything
and the man inside of it.

HARLAN GLENN: What was called
the bone sack or the jump

smock, it was designed to
be worn over the uniform.

They had three different
types of smocks--

the green, the splinter,
and the tan and water.

The smock served as a practical
garment with its many pockets.

It was a holdall
that the paratrooper

could throw extra ammunition,
rations, whatever he needed.

So he was like a
moving rucksack.

LEE ERMEY: Underneath the bone
sack was the Fliegerbluse,

or the fly blouse.

On the blouse was their
jump badge and collar tabs.

Each branch had their own color.

Yellow was for infantry and
black was for pioneers, which

are like airborne engineers
who like to blow stuff up.

The Fallschirm had some
pretty fancy pants, too.

Unlike the standard
infantry wool trousers,

the jump pants, for one, had a
special pocket on their thigh

for what they call the
gravity knife, much

like the American
paratroopers had,

was that they'd cut themselves
out of their rigging

if they were caught in a tree.

LEE ERMEY: They wore knee pads
for extra support and jump

boots to better absorb the
initial shock of landing.

The first pattern laced up
the side and the later pattern

laced up the front.

Topping off the whole deal
were leather jump gloves,

which kept the air from
going up into their smock

and blowing it up
like a kid's pool toy.

Once they landed, the
gloves were discarded.

The weapons they carried
were all pretty basic,

from the K-98
rifle to the MP 38.

The MP stands for
Machine Pistol,

and 38 is the model and
year that it was made.

The support weapon of choice was
the MG 34, or Machine Gun model

1934.

But the neatest
weapon that they had

was the FG 42, which stands for
Fallschirmjaegergewehr 1942.

Easy for you to say.

The guns only
weighed 9.9 pounds,

which made them ideal
for the airborne warrior.

Lean and mean, but
they only made so many.

And not everybody got one.

One piece of hardware that every
Fallschirmjaeger did have was

a side arm, like the
Walthers P38 or 08 Luger.

But not everything they
had worked like a charm.

Their chute steering
designs sucked.

HARLAN GLENN: In no way can the
German paratrooper reach back

like an American or
a British paratrooper

could and control his risers.

These German paratroopers
are basically

like toys floating to Earth.

They cannot steer themselves.

LEE ERMEY: But once
they got on the ground,

they knew what they were
doing, and racked up

an impressive
string of victories.

But in May of 1941, great gear
wasn't going to be enough.

They launched what was to
become their last offensive

on a little Greek
island called Crete.

HARLAN GLENN: Crete was known
as the graveyard of the German

airborne.

Even though the German airborne
did achieve their objective,

there were so many casualties
that Hitler was horrified

with their losses.

And from then on, the German
airborne will never again

employ as an airborne weapon.

What's interesting about
the German paratroopers is

as the war started,
they were known

for their offensive measures,
whereas the war progressed,

at about the
midpoint, 1943 and on,

they were known for their
defensive abilities.

They were masters of
defense and they proved this

at Monte Cassino and in
the hedgerows of Normandy.

LEE ERMEY: They were tenacious
on the attack and defiant

on the defense.

The German Fallschirmjaeger
was one tough customer.

Oorah.

The other critical piece of gear
the German paratroopers needed

to get into combat was the
Junkers 52 to transport plane.

And Christopher in
Staten Island, New York,

is looking for a little
flight time with the workhorse

of the German Luftwaffe.

Back in WW2, the Junkers Ju
52 had everything the German

Luftwaffe needed and then some.

This little transport
plane with the big wings

was light and reliable.

But it could still carry
a platoon of paratroopers

or a ton of bombs.

The secret was in those
crazy cantilevered wings.

They had special patented
double wing flaps and ailerons.

That meant you could
still get great lift

with a heavy payload, even
at very low airspeeds.

More than 3,500 Ju 52s
served with the Luftwaffe,

and most of them were still
around when the war was over.

Junkers is spelled
J-U-N-K-E-R-S, but believe me,

these SOBs were not junkers.

After the war, other
European countries

snatched them up like
allied Hershey bars

and flew them into the ground.

The last Ju 52 in active
service flew for three decades

after World War II, until the
Swiss Air Force retired her

in 1979.

Got an email here from
Michael in Honolulu, Hawaii,

asking about a
subject that is near

and dear to the
old Gunny's heart.

Michael writes, please
tell this old soldier

about my beloved M113.

No problem, Michael, because
I know from my experience,

if you wanted to get
anything done in Vietnam,

you had to have two things--

a Huey helicopter and an M113.

This is the M113 APC.

APC stands for Armored
Personnel Carrier, which means

the M113 is a battle taxi.

Its job is making sure the
troops get to the front lines

in one piece.

It looks like an
aluminum box with tracks.

And guess what?

That's exactly what it is.

But it's that simplicity that
makes the M113 one of the most

versatile infantry
vehicles in history.

It has served as a model
for so many other vehicles

that the M113 is said to be
the head of its own family

of vehicles-- the M113 FOV.

The M113 was designed
in the late '50s

and the first production
models hit the dirt in 1960.

From the get-go, it was clear
this little APC was going

to revolutionize infantry ops.

And it did just that in Vietnam.

The M113 brought
mobility to the battle.

You could bring your troops in.

They were fairly rested.

They hadn't had to walk.

They came in at a
much faster speed.

And you could get them
there with their equipment.

They didn't have
to carry at all,

so the troops were a lot
fresher at the point of battle.

LEE ERMEY: The M113 was made
out of aircraft-grade aluminum,

which protected the troops but
kept it a lean, mean fighting

machine.

At just under 12 tons, you
could drop it from a plane

or have it swim
across the river.

The M113 was simple
to operate and could

be served by two crewmen--

a driver and a vehicle commander
who helped direct the thing.

Each M113 could haul 11
men in the back, as well

as their weapons and
support equipment.

And for that little bit
of extra protection,

a trusty .50 caliber machine
gun came stock on every model.

The first M113s were powered
by a 209 horsepower gasoline

engine.

They had a top speed of only
around 37 miles an hour,

so they weren't going
to be winning any races.

But they'd get you to
the fight a hell of a lot

faster than straight-legging it.

But there was a little
problem with the first models.

Can you say combustion engine?

Having gas tanks aboard, if
you took a round in the side

and punctured a tank,
it was it was fire.

So it wasn't real practical.

LEE ERMEY: As a result, the
M113 A1 was introduced in 1964.

This one had a
diesel engine, which

cut down on the fire hazard and
also increased the vehicle's

range.

This baby saw a lot of
action over in Vietnam.

They performed extremely
well, increasing the speed

and mobility of the infantry and
serving as medical transports

to get wounded off
the battlefield.

But its high center of gravity
meant that a simple malfunction

could mean serious trouble.

If you were to have a track
failure, where the track would

sever, come apart, whether it
was from mechanical failure

or driving over an
explosive of some kind,

you pretty much lost
control of the vehicle.

And it was at that point
they could tip over.

LEE ERMEY: And the
new M113 still only

had about an inch and
a half of aluminum

as its protective shell.

If you were unlucky
enough to roll over a mine

or if Charlie got a
direct hit with an RPG,

you were going to
have a real bad day.

It wasn't perfect, but
most G.I.s would tell you

they'd take a ride in a A1 over
humping out in the open any day

of the week.

And the military seemed to
think enough of the M113 A1

to make it the basis of the
M113 family of vehicles,

still in use to this day
throughout the world.

Add some radio
equipment in the back

and you get the M577
command post carrier.

Throw a Vulcan air
defense system on the top

and you get the M163
air defense vehicle.

Other variants can be adapted to
fire mortars or tow a missile.

And hell, that's
just the beginning.

With its simple, versatile
design and its battle

proven toughness,
there's no doubt

we'll be seeing new variants
of the M113 for a long time

to come.

Now, I ain't bragging or
nothin', but that APC is just

something that I happen
to know a lot about.

But there's another subject
that's been bugging me

for a long time,
and finally somebody

sent in an email
asking about it.

So thanks to Bob in
Lombard, Illinois,

for asking, why do rations
have that crescent on them?

Now, that's this little
thing right here.

And you see it on everything
from the oldest K rations

to the newest MREs.

The reason why is
kind of a long story,

so I'm just going to
cut right to the chase.

Blame it on the French.

To figure out how we got
the crescent on the rations,

like these classics
from World War II,

we got to start in 1683.

That's when Emperor Leopold's
army beat back the Turks

in the Siege of Vienna.

To celebrate the
victory, the emperor's

chef baked bread in the
shape of a crescent--

the Turkish holy symbol.

It was kind of a
culinary up yours.

And old Napoleon blows
into town and likes

the crescent-shaped bread.

He takes it back to France,
where it becomes the croissant,

which is French for crescent.

Then the story gets
a little fuzzy,

but somehow some American
somewhere around the mid-1800s

is looking for a symbol for the
Army's commissary department.

Maybe he thinks, huh, war, food,
croissant, crescent, great.

And of course, once the guys who
hauled the food and cooked food

started wearing the
crescent, it only

made sense to put it on
the ration boxes, too.

And we still do.

That's what I love
about this show.

You ask a simple
question and you

get a long, complicated answer
that's pretty damn interesting,

if I do say so myself.

So keep e-mailing me, folks,
because this is information

central.

Semper Fi.

Carry on.

Please tell this old soldier
about my beloved M113.

Well, we'll do it in
the next take, Michael.

Just hang loose.

[grunting]

Got to watch that, Gunny.

That's a big step there.

Asking me to tell him all
about German [inaudible]..

Say it again?

Fallschirmjaeger.