Mail Call (2002–…): Season 4, Episode 13 - Mk V Special Operations Craft - full transcript

Knock off the jaw-jackin'.

It's time for "Mail Call!"

[drum roll]

[engine humming]

[engine revving down]

Welcome to "Mail Call."

Got a new set of wheels today.

Well, tracks would be more like it.

But don't let this cute little tankette fool you.

I'm totin' one big-ass weapon.

Check it out.



This is a Bren light machine gun.

And Robert in Fort Lauderdale, Florida

wants the lowdown on what these honeys can do.

[gunfire]

R LEE ERMEY (VOICEOVER): It was way ahead of its time

when it joined the British Armed Services back in 1937.

The Bren light machine gun doled out a heaping helping of lead

from World War II, all the way up to the 1990s.

The name Bren comes from combining the names Bruno

and Enfield.

That's the location of the arms factories in Czechoslovakia

and Great Britain, where the gun was developed

in the late 1930s.

The Bren could easily be fired by a single soldier,



but they called this a two-man gun

because you needed a second guy to carry

the tools, spare parts, an extra barrel, and ammunition that

made this honey really cook.

The gun weighed in at just under 20 pounds,

and you could fire it from the hip.

But it worked a lot better and was a lot more accurate

with a bipod.

BP .303 caliber ammo was loaded into a 30-round banana

magazine, but on the battlefield,

the guys figured out if you only filled the magazine with 28

rounds, the weapon was a lot less likely to jam.

[gunfire]

On paper, the Bren can squirt 500 rounds a minute,

but in real life, the rate of fire

was down around 120 rounds per minute.

That was still plenty lethal and plenty hot.

The Bren gun was gas-operated, which means that gas is trapped

behind the round when you fire to automatically re-cock

the weapon.

The Bren gun was also air-cooled,

but after firing a couple hundred rounds,

that barrel could take the skin right off your hands.

So the Bren gun was one of the first light machine guns

to have a quick-change barrel.

A turn of the carrying handle and the hot barrel pops out,

and you can snap in a cool one.

Then, in less than 10 seconds, you're back to firing.

And with an effective range of about one-third of a mile,

the Bren gun was always ready, willing, and able for action.

[gunfire]

I got a lot of emails about the Bren gun,

but the one from Leonardo in Kailua, Hawaii

really makes me hot.

He asked, "Let's see you fire the Bren gun,

or are you too chicken?"

Well, Leonardo, the only chicken in this camp

is on the barbecue!

So stand back!

I'm loaded, and I'm ready to make a little fruit salad.

[gun cocking]

[intense music]

[gunfire]

Wow!

In their heyday, these babies were accurate and reliable,

but kind of hefty.

So that's where this hunk of armor comes in.

The Bren Gun Carrier saw a lot of service in WW2 and Korea.

And Russell in Asheville, North Carolina

wants a view from the driver's seat.

No problem!

Let's go.

[intense music]

R LEE ERMEY (VOICEOVER): Fast, light, and fun

aren't words that usually come to mind when you're talking

tanks, but the Bren Gun Carrier is all that and more.

And whipping around the trails at HQ

was a blast in this vintage machine, a Canadian-made Mark

I built in 1941.

Officially known as the Universal Carrier,

these machines were built by the British, Canadians,

and Australians.

Their job-- take Bren gun crews across ground

where pesky small arms fire would ruin their day.

Unofficially known as Bren Carriers,

if there ever was a generic track vehicle, this is it.

And by the end of WW2, these tankettes

were hauling all kinds of loads.

The Bren Gun Carrier weighs a tad over 4 tons,

but it's fast, agile, and can turn on a dime--

well, as much as any tank can.

And it does all this with a Ford V8 under the hood.

I think I need to get me one of these.

[engine decelerating]

[laughing] What a rush!

You know war was hell, but taking a spin in this piece

of history is heaven.

Ooh-rah!

Man, have I got a great story for you.

John, in Gainesville, Florida, is a new recruit

who's thinking about trying to qualify for the Green Berets.

But before he does, he wants to see what he'd be up against.

Well, John, I don't know what kind of a man

you are, but you will need some serious grit to pass

their final exam.

Hya!

ALL (SINGING): This is Pineland.

R LEE ERMEY (VOICEOVER): Welcome to Pineland, an untamed mess

of a country divided by two warring factions.

Now, in this case, it's the People's Republic

of Pineland versus the UPA, the United Provinces of Atlantica.

Well, it's not really a foreign country,

but a 8,500 square mile hunk of land in the middle of North

Carolina.

It's filled with role-playing actors pretending

to be friends or enemies to these Special Forces

in training.

This world of make-believe is the ultimate field training

exercise.

It's known as Robin Sage, but don't ask me why 'cause that

ain't important.

This is the final exam for our Special Forces studs.

If they pass this, they'll earn the coveted Green Beret.

This two-week unconventional warfare course

puts all previous Special Forces training

to the test in situations they may run up

against in the real world.

But you won't find no Rambo stuff here.

The main weapon used by all Robin Sage students

is the most important one they've got--

the noodle between their ears.

Special Forces are called the tip of the spear,

as they're the first guys into an area of conflict.

Being a diplomat is just as important as being a soldier.

But let me tell ya, it ain't easy.

Meet Major Hawk, the guerrilla chief of Pineland.

You men happy?

(ALL): Oy, oy, oy.

R LEE ERMEY (VOICEOVER): He's a former US soldier pretending

to be a suspicious warlord.

His role is to teach these Green Beret wannabes

that some of our allies can get really grumpy.

Americans are here, so they must want something again.

R LEE ERMEY (VOICEOVER): The 12-member team

of trainees must learn how to teach Major Hawk's

local guerrilla force to fight for their country,

according to the rules set by the Geneva Convention.

You don't want to get in front of the vehicle

if the lights are on.

You can see it, you can smell it.

That's cordite-- that-- that smell.

Then you're gonna leave it and you're going to get the heck--

heck out of there.

R LEE ERMEY (VOICEOVER): They show them

how to blow up their enemies as well as save the wounded.

They even pay the militia for their services.

Today, Major Hawk's script has them throwing a wrench

in the works.

Which brings me into a point here.

I'm glad you brought that up, there, Captain.

R LEE ERMEY (VOICEOVER): He insists

that rescuing his daughter Amy from the UPA forces

is now the Americans' top priority.

I'm depending on you and your Americans

to organize it and run it, but I'm

gonna be there assisting and offering my advice.

All right.

And I fully expect you to make this a successful operation

for my daughter.

If you screw it up, we're going to have to rethink our position

with you Americans.

R LEE ERMEY (VOICEOVER): The Green Beret hopefuls change

their focus to stay on the good side of the war chief.

After days of recon, they plan a rescue mission

using whatever they have to build a map of the objective.

Later that night, the team is off to the rescue.

[gunfire]

R LEE ERMEY (VOICEOVER): They find Amy all alone, out

in the open, but unharmed.

[motor roaring]

As you see, we were successful tonight.

We got her.

She's back with her father, so he's a happy man.

Congratulations after this successful mission.

Thank you for my daughter. - Thanks, sir.

R LEE ERMEY (VOICEOVER): But the next morning

proves that all is not well in Pineland.

After a year away from her father,

Amy has been brainwashed by the bad guys.

AMY: Dad, I'm not gonna listen to you anymore--

MAJOR HAWKS: Amy! - Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.

[chattering]

AMY: No, you turned on those people.

Those were like my family to me.

No!

R LEE ERMEY (VOICEOVER): Turns out nobody bothered

to search the chief's daughter.

Big mistake, boys.

--ran out here with him.

R LEE ERMEY (VOICEOVER): Major Hawk takes matters

into his own hands. - No!

Sir! Sir!

Sir! [gunshot]

AMY: [screams]

It turns out she's got a UPA boyfriend.

I mean, in my country, that's it.

That doesn't justify what you just did today.

- It does to me. - No, you're--

You're-- you're in (EMPHATICALLY) MY country.

I know that.

R LEE ERMEY (VOICEOVER): The students

never know what kind of crap Major Hawk is going to pull.

Although he ain't going to be getting any Oscars,

the students have to react like it's the real deal.

Most of Hawk's actions are based on real events that went down

in Afghanistan and Iraq.

SPECIALIST ANA CRUZ: I think it's a great way of training,

because this is some of the situations

that they're going to encounter in the real world.

So they can go back on and say, well, this

is how I handled the situation, or, you know,

this is the mistake that I made.

Maybe I'm not going to make it again.

(ALL): [chanting]

R LEE ERMEY (VOICEOVER): You bet they won't--

that is, if they ever make it out of Pineland.

(ALL): [chanting] Pineland, Pineland, Pineland!

[whirring]

[clattering]

Operation Robin Sage is designed to test Special Forces

students on unconventional warfare.

And Stan in Anaheim, California, wrote

in asking, "What kind of unconventional vehicles

Special Forces are using these days?"

Well, for that answer, we're not going to the motor pool.

We are going to the stable.

R LEE ERMEY (VOICEOVER): At Fort Bragg in North Carolina,

Special Forces soldiers are gearing up for duty

at a lot of places where the weather's brutal, modern

convenience don't exist, and the roads are impassable

a lot of the time.

So that's why training includes a little quality time

on the mule course.

This is where the future Green Berets learn

how to use what they've got to get where they're going, even

if the mules they're using aren't always with the program.

It's a new approach to training a fully prepared soldier,

but it is not the first time beasts of burden

have been used by American soldiers in warfare.

Back in WW2, Merrill's Marauders were soldiers stationed

in Burma, who also found out that mules came in handy where

vehicles wouldn't go if you could get them

up the gangplank.

[braying]

Git along, little dogie.

You know what?

We have the best weapons and the toughest tanks

and the most reliable choppers in the world.

But the United States military is also smart enough

to know that sometimes your best friend is an ass.

Got an email from Brandon in Peoria, Arizona.

He writes, "Tell me all about the cool features

on the Predator UAV, Ermey."

[chuckles] No problem, Brandon!

But we're not talking cool here, we're talking red-hot hellfire!

[energetic music]

R LEE ERMEY (VOICEOVER): To check out the Predator,

we went to Indian Springs, just outside of Las Vegas.

This is where the Air Force trains pilots to remotely fly

this unique unmanned aircraft.

MAJ MICHAEL BEAVIN: The MQ-1 Predator has a wingspan

of about 50 feet.

It flies approximately 80 miles an hour at 20,000 feet.

It costs $3.8 million, which is significantly less

than most other aircraft the military flies today.

It's also of unique value because

of the incredible intelligence that it provides to commanders

at all levels.

It saves lives on a daily basis.

In order to do that, it has some unique features.

One of those interesting features

is the Hellfire missile.

The Hellfire is a relatively small missile at 100 pounds,

and it's guided via laser energy.

Because of its laser designation,

the Hellfire provides absolutely pinpoint accuracy.

In order to obtain that pinpoint accuracy,

we now move to the Multi-Spectrail Targeting

System, or the MTS ball.

The MTS ball in this panel has both infrared as well as E-O

video capability.

And, in fact, the electro-optical capability

is kind of like your camcorder at home on steroids.

We use those high-resolution streaming images in order

to positively identify targets.

Once those targets that we've identified

have met the rules of engagement,

we then provide laser designation

by this feature on the MTS ball, the laser designator,

and that's what guides the missile into the target

for its ultimate destruction.

Because it's remotely piloted, there's

gotta be a way to communicate between the air

crew and the Predator.

The mechanism for that are the antennas that you see here.

Those antennas enable the crew that's back on the ground

to control the aircraft via a two-way communication

information flow.

And that, in turn, gives commanders at all echelons

the ability to see into hostile territory

without endangering lives.

The Predator's power plant is a four-cylinder gasoline

powered engine.

It generates about 100 horsepower, roughly about

the same as my motorcycle.

Although it's a small engine, it's an incredibly efficient

engine.

In fact, it allows for missions that

exceed 20 hours in duration, and that's significantly longer

than any other military aircraft.

The nose cameras are the pilot's eyes.

It feeds back information to the ground control station

and allows him to fly the Predator.

R LEE ERMEY (VOICEOVER): Here's the ground control station.

It comes with an antenna to communicate with the Predator

and a satellite dish to beam intelligence anywhere

in the world.

Think of the ground control station

as the Predator's cockpit, and inside its camo-colored walls,

there's a pilot who can be miles away from his aircraft.

MAJ DEAN BUSHEY: This is where I control the Predator from.

I've got my standard controls, a flap lever,

prop lever, throttle, and control of the airplane.

My ailerons and my elevators are right here.

I've got a lot of different displays

to display information about where the Predator is going

and what I'm doing.

I've got my airspeed, my engine indications, my altitude.

And I've also got a tracker display up above that tells me

where the Predator is.

It's a little GPS overlay on a moving map.

So I've got all the standard controls of an airplane.

Even though I'm not in the airplane, I'm on the ground,

I've got all that information that a normal pilot would need.

One of the most challenging things about the Predator

is to get the pilots used to flying without any motion

feedback or sound feedback, just off of what they see

and interpreting the data.

R LEE ERMEY (VOICEOVER): Sitting next to the pilot,

a sensor operator controls the Predator's camera and laser

functions.

Buck Rogers, eat your heart out.

SSGT HOLLY HESS: This is the sensor operator workstation--

the focus, the iris, and the zoom lever for our cameras.

This is our control stick.

We use this to zoom in, and we can also

use this to fire the laser.

We have two types of cameras on there.

We have infrared, which uses thermal energy, and DTV, which

is like your regular optical camera.

Everything else you see here is pretty much like the pilot

station that we talked about earlier.

We're also seeing our target information.

We're looking at the lat/longs, our range to target in meters,

range to target in nautical miles,

and also our target width.

Up here, we're looking at lat/longs of the aircraft

at this time, and also the altitude

that the aircraft is at.

Over here, we're looking at our focal length of the camera,

which is ultra-narrow.

Right now, we're looking at a potential target

with our infrared cameras.

R LEE ERMEY (VOICEOVER): A potential target

is toast when the sensor operator and pilot work

together to aim and launch one of the Predator's

Hellfire missiles.

If we actually find a high-value target,

then we need to engage with the Hellfire missile.

I would go through a series of checklists,

and after I've got the target identified and verified

through several sources, we can actually engage the enemy.

The sensor operator over there is actually

going to put the laser energy onto the target.

We call it "lasing the target."

Over here, I'm going to actually push a button, over here,

and pull the trigger, and that will actually

launch the missile.

R LEE ERMEY (VOICEOVER): With its cool advanced features,

the Predator has played a key role in America's

military operations since 1996.

That's when it first went operational in Bosnia.

Now, it's being deployed successfully

in the war on terrorism.

Already the aircraft has served as an eye in the sky

during the rescue of Jessica Lynch

and the capture of Saddam Hussein.

We're flying missions today, all over the hotspots in Iraq

and Afghanistan.

We're looking at road intersections.

We're looking at houses.

We're looking at possible conflicts.

We're saving lives out there by being eyes for the special ops

forces, the ground forces, for the Army, for the Navy,

for all the commanders, so they can see what's

going on real-time in the battlefield

and in those small spaces where the pockets of terrorism

and resistance exist.

R LEE ERMEY (VOICEOVER): The MQ-1 is just the beginning.

Soon, there will be a new and improved Predator

online and ready to go.

Osama, consider yourself warned.

The MQ-9 will be coming along the lines in 2006-2007.

It'll be able to go up to 42,000 feet.

It'll go up to 275-300 miles per hour.

It will carry 3,000 pounds of munitions.

So this is just the beginning.

The new one, coming online in the next couple of years,

will be even more amazing, even faster, even better.

Remote-controlled aircraft loaded for bear aren't as new

as you might think.

Bard in Austin, Texas wants to know how far back do UAVs go?

So let's check it out.

R LEE ERMEY (VOICEOVER): We are going back six decades

to Operation Aphrodite, which, in my humble opinion,

turned out to be a big waste of some perfectly good airplanes.

In 1944, the United States Army Air Force

were looking for a way to blow up submarine pens, V-1 missile

sites, and other deep targets that

were resistant to conventional bombing.

The solution they came up with was

to convert 25 war-weary B-17s into radio-controlled assault

drones.

The plan was simple--

pack the Flying Fortresses with about 10 tons

of high explosive, add an impact fuse, and ka-blam!

The B-17s were officially renamed BQ-7 Aphrodites,

but everyone knew them as Weary Willies.

Technology wasn't all that high-tech back then,

so check out how this drone worked.

The Weary Willie would take off with a two-man crew.

They'd get the plane to cruising altitude

and point it in the right direction.

Once on track, they activated the radio remote control

equipment in the cockpit, and armed the fuse.

Then they'd bail out.

I mean, they were riding inside a bomb, for Christ's sake!

From there, another B-17 in radio contact with the Weary

Willie would remotely steer the drone

and shut it down when it approached the target.

Then the plane would drop directly on the target,

theoretically.

Operation Aphrodite may have been a good idea on paper,

but it was a total bust in the air.

Few planes, if any, ever hit their target,

and the whole project was scrapped back in 1945.

But we have a much better track record now with the Predator.

How much better?

Well, that's classified.

So check back with me in 2010.

Semper Fi.

Carry on.

How about you and me go for a nice little ride?

[chuckles] Yeah.

Operation Aphrodite may have been a good idea--

let's try that again.

[beep]

Operation Aphrodite may have been good--

[beep]

This one is one of those uncontrollable impulses.

[beep]

Operation Robin Sage is designed and tested

by some forces, students on--