MacGyver (2016–…): Season 2, Episode 15 - Murdoc + Handcuffs - full transcript

Previously on MacGyver...
Mr. Fletcher? Mr. Henry Fletcher?

He's got a gun, Mac!

RILEY: Looks like our boy
Henry was quite the hit man.

JACK: Henry's on lockdown.
There's no sign of Murdoc

anywhere in the city.

Henry! Such a pleasure
to finally meet you.

(groans) (chuckles)

See, I'm starting my
own business venture.

A little collective,
if you will.

And you are my first recruit.

JACK: Jaguar! BOZER: Panther!



A wolverine! And not
Hugh Jackman... the animal.

(chuckles) A bear!

A tiger!

Tiger-bear. Man, what
the hell is a tiger-bear?

It's a criss-cross. Had to kill one
with my bare hands once. What?

RILEY: Whoa, whoa, whoa!
Mac, we talked about this.

No props. (MacGyver sighs)

I thought you said he was smart.

MATTY (imitates
buzzer): Time's up!

What?

Girls rule.

Boys don't. (whoops)

MacGYVER: Fridge.

BOZER: What? The
word was refrigerator.



JACK: Refrigerator?

BOZER: Mac, in
what parallel dimension

do refrigerators have claws?

You milking a cow? MacGYVER:
I was tracing the shape

of the evaporator coils

on the back of
every refrigerator.

Nobody knows what that is, dude.

How are you a genius
everywhere else

and so bad at this stuff?
BOZER: We discussed this, Mac.

Keep it simple and nontechnical.

It's charades,
not How It's Made.

Yeah, I get lost in the details.

Fellas, let's go now.

The girls are cleaning our clocks.
I think you mean cleaned, Jack.

The ladies have cleaned your
clocks. We're going to 20, right?

17 to two, Jack.

So you're saying
there's a chance?

No. Really, I'm just embarrassed

for you at this point.

Embarrassed?
Come on now, fellas.

We're getting our
second wind, right? Right.

Oh, speaking of seconds,
who wants a refill?

Me. JACK: Yeah, I'll help you.

You got to be drunk

to figure out what he's doing.

And what's with that soap opera
stopwatch? It's not regulation.

It's an antique.
MacGYVER: I like it.

Thank you.

Do you want to take it
apart and see how it works?

BOZER: You're much better
at that than charades. (laughing)

What's with the
Kool-Aid smile? Oh, yeah!

(chuckles)

It is amazing how much
you amuse yourself.

But it's awesome how amused
you guys are by my amusement.

I know what you're doing, Riley.

I'm getting everyone
refills. No, no.

Inviting your mom
to charades tonight?

It's just like when
Susan and Sharon

recreated their parents'
first date at Martinelli's.

Okay, try again, but with
different words. The Parent Trap.

You might not be
identical twins with yourself,

but I know you invited
your mom here tonight

to try to rekindle
whatever spark

there might have
been between us.

Who you think you
are, Hayley Mills?

You mean Lindsay Lohan?

I'm not talking
about the reboot.

Reboots never work.
That one worked.

The point is, I've seen
the movie too many times.

It's not going to happen. Okay.

Between Sarah last
year and Dixie last week,

you've had your share
of heartbreaks. (chuckles)

So has Mom.

Now that's she's thinking
about moving back to L.A.,

would it really be so bad if
you two gave it another shot?

(doorbell rings) I...

Saved by the pizza guy.
But think about it, yeah?

Hi, does Angus
MacGyver live here?

Hands in the air.

On your knees. On your knees.

You move and I'll kill you.
Shake him down, Bozer.

Jack? Mom, just stay behind me.

What's going on?
We'll explain later.

He's clean. Wow.

Murdoc was right.
You really do live here.

You know, it's-it's
not very secure.

Where is Murdoc? He's
probably just a distraction.

I know my word
doesn't mean much,

but I promise you,
Murdoc is nowhere near us.

I came alone and unarmed.

So why are you here? We
have something very important

to discuss, and trust me,

you're going to want to
hear what I have to say.

♪ ♪

Hey. All right.

You know, this is
all so unnecessary.

I just came here to
show you something.

Then show us.

You said you'd explain
later. It's later, sweetie.

What's going on?

Mom, I know you
have a lot of questions.

I just need you to be
patient right now, okay?

(pained grunting)

Well, Murdoc sure
doesn't look happy.

You'll regret this!

Yeah, well, with Murdoc,
looks can be deceiving.

Get me out! Now!

What's this about? Revenge.

Well, before Murdoc recruited
me into his growing collective,

I had a pretty good
life hiding in plain sight.

MATTY: Murdoc outed you.

Boo-hoo.

You're in the wrong
place for sympathy, pal.

You said Murdoc
recruited you to a collective.

So there's more of you? Yes.

And each one of them
has a story just like mine.

JACK: Oh, come on.

You expect us to believe
there's an anti-Justice League

that got tired of the exposure
and just turned on him?

Is that it? Precisely.

And I'm here to
offer you a deal.

In 12 hours, we are willing
to hand Murdoc over to you.

All we ask in return is
$10 million in cash and...

Oh, is that all? I'm not done.

The only agents allowed
at the exchange are you two.

After the exchange,
no one follows us.

We walk away clean.

I'll give you a few
minutes to discuss,

but the clock is ticking.

As you can imagine, we
have other interested parties.

JACK: We don't
need a few minutes.

This is a trap,
plain and simple.

It might be, but it's
also the best lead

that we've had on
Murdoc in months.

If there's even a remote
chance that taking this deal

leads him back
to federal custody,

well, then we have to take it.

BOZER: But what
about this collective?

Taking this deal means
helping every killer

Murdoc recruited go free.

And in exchange, we get Murdoc.

JACK: I can't
believe you guys are

actually considering this.

Huh?

We're going to trust a former

fifth-grade teacher/
professional killer?

Why am I the only
one feeling duped here?

You're not, Jack. But
Murdoc is the big fish here.

So you're cool with this? Yes.

Well, you're making it hard to
uphold that Wookiee life debt.

But if you're in,
yeah, I'm in. Let's do it.

Looks like you
got yourself a deal.

But I promise you this...

If you double-cross us,

you will be the very
first person I hunt down.

(inhales sharply)

Lovely.

I'll be in touch with the deets.

You mind?

Get out of here.

See you tomorrow, gentlemen.

Now could somebody tell me
what's going on? (door shuts)

We just made a deal with the
Devil to catch Satan himself.

That's what's going on.

Think you brought enough stuff?

For the doc? Hell no.

This whole thing
still feels hinky to me.

You know, back in the
day, there's a mutiny,

make the guy walk the plank.

I mean, why would Fletcher
just hand Murdoc over to us, huh?

Want me to tell you why?
'Cause he wants us dead.

That's why. It's a
big old bear trap.

I know, Jack.
That's why you're not

the only one who came prepared.

You brought something,
too, huh? Yeah.

Please, tell me
it's a death ray.

(scoffs) No.

It is a portable
gas chromatograph.

So it takes, um,
samples from the air

and it scans them for
explosive particulate matter.

So it's a bomb detector?

Yeah. Why didn't you say that?

I-I thought I did.
No, you didn't.

(phone vibrates)

I'm sorry that your mom
got dragged into this.

How's she doing?

On a scale from the time I
got my belly button pierced

to the time she got
kidnapped by people

who wanted me to hack
the NSA? (chuckles)

Mainly she has
a lot of questions

I'm not allowed to answer.

But occupational hazard, right?

Yeah.

JACK (over comm): Hey, Riley, what
do you see at the location Fletcher gave?

(signal breaks up) What
the hell just happened?

You kidding me? I think
the comms just went out.

I just lost all sat feed
and cell signal in the area.

So, Mac and Jack are heading
to a meeting with Murdoc,

and at least one
other psychopath,

and we don't even
have eyes on them?

Cell phones are down, too.
It's got to be the collective.

I guess Fletcher was
serious when he said just us.

Riley, I don't
care what it takes,

you get us eyes
back on our boys.

Big old bear trap.

We know what we
were getting into.

(makes trap sound)

Aah!

I'm not seeing anybody.

Your little doohickey
picking anything up yet?

No, but...

(echoing thud) I
think they're here.

(vehicle approaching)

Morning, gents.

I trust you two are alone.

As you can see, I am not.

But if you both
behave yourselves,

you get to go home with a prize.

Oh, MacGyver, how I have
dreamed of our reunion.

Though my dream
didn't include these.

Cash first.

Uh, how about no?

You're not seeing
one single dollar

till we have
Cuckoo-Ka-Choo in custody.

Well, I'm afraid
that won't work.

You see, I don't trust you.

How can you not trust
us? We're the good guys.

How about a show of good
faith and we meet in the middle?

Careful, Angus.
I'm quite ticklish.

(laughs)

Pleasure doing
business with you.

Oh, and, Murdoc,
if turning you in

didn't pay so well, I'd
have killed you myself.

Remember that.

Let's go.

You drive, Mac. I got him.

Do me a favor, Looney Tunes.

Anything for you, Jack.

Ditch the creepy smile

or I'll hop back there
and slap it off your face.

I'm sensing some anger, Jack.

Still mad at me for killing
your friend last Christmas?

Oh, how was, uh, Cage's
funeral, by the way?

I meant to send flowers.

Well, I hate to break it
to you, but she's still alive.

Yeah, I guess you'll
have to erase that notch

off your belt, fruit loop.

Really? That's surprising.

JACK: He just told you

you're not nearly as
good as you think you are,

and by nightfall you'll
be back in a ten-by-ten,

so what are you smiling about?

Just daydreaming.

Do you remember
when you were a kid,

and you'd be playing
in your backyard,

and you come across a spider,

and you scoop it into
your hand, take it inside,

and you spend hours
alone in your room

pulling its legs off, one by one

by one, until it

can't move anymore.

And-and then just when this
creature's reached peak terror,

you'd squish it into
jelly with your thumb.

Seriously?

What? I'm the only
one that did that?

Does this disturbing trip down
memory lane have a point?

Of course.

There's always a
point, MacGyver.

I am smiling, Jack,

because when I
catch those people

who handed me over to you,
I'm going to play with them

the same way I did my spiders.

Let me shoot him.

No. Please?

I-I know in my heart

it's the right thing to do.

You know, you have
an inflated sense

of your own
importance there, Doc.

Mother always
said I was special.

Let's go.

(Murdoc laughs)

Going for a ride
in a whirlybird.

#Fun.

Zip it.

(device rapidly beeping)

What is that?

Run. Run!

(all screaming)

(high-pitched whining)

(grunts)

Jack.

Jack.

You okay?

I'm a little woozy,
but I'm still breathing.

I'm fine, too, over
here. Thanks for asking.

Shut up. Nobody cares.

Okay, I'm gonna go out on a limb

and say that was
not an accident.

We got to get out of here.

JACK: Yeah, well,
that thing's trashed.

We're not going
anywhere in that.

Your insurance rates are
going to absolutely skyrocket.

I thought I told you to...

(gunshots)

Take cover now!

(grunts)

Who is this guy?

Friend of yours?

We both know I
don't have friends.

We got to get out of here now.

Go, go, go!

(grunts)

(Jack shouts)

(chuckling) Wait.

Hey, what's so funny?

What are you laughing at? Huh?

This was all part of your plan,
wasn't it, crime genius, huh?

Dangling yourself
out there as bait

to get us all blown up.

Ha, ha, ha, very funny.

Come on, Jackie boy, you
know me better than that.

If I was behind this,
you'd both be chained

to that helicopter as it
burned in midair, right, huh?

I don't know.

Face-to-face, screaming
in absolute terror

as you plummet to a
beautiful, fiery death.

What is the matter with you?

I'm just spitballing here,
but you get the point.

Come on. If this
was a double-cross,

the worst one in the
history of double-crosses.

Yeah.

Yeah. Fletcher took our money

and he circled back to
kill this toolbox himself.

And that's a
win-win right there.

Wait, look, there's
another possibility here.

Fletcher. He said
that there were

other interested parties
who wanted Murdoc,

so maybe he went to someone
else before he came to us.

JACK: Yeah, and then
that certain someone

tracked Fletcher to
kill Murdoc himself.

It's a whole lot
cheaper that way.

So the real question is,
Murdoc, who wants you dead?

Pull up a chair, boys,
this could take a while.

We ain't pulling up no chair.

We're going to figure
this out on the plane

on the way back to the Phoenix.

Come on.

Take him.

(grunts) I got him.

(sighs) Cell phone
towers are still down.

Oh, great, so we're
on our own with Murdoc

and his soon-to-be-dead,
unidentified friend.

Again, not my friend.

Well, whoever he is,
he can't be far behind.

We need to figure out who we're
dealing with here, Mac. Pronto.

If we can take a picture of him
and somehow get it to Phoenix,

then they can run
facial recognition.

How the hell we
supposed to do that?

We can't get close
enough to the Terminator

without being terminated.

(coughs)

What? Set a trap.

Come on, nature
photographers use lures

to take photos of
dangerous animals.

This is no different.

Draw the man out.

Set your camera to
record and autosend

and then when cell towers
are working again, voilà,

the video will wing its
way across the country

to dear Matilda.

Sound about right, Angus?

Actually, that's exactly
what I had in mind.

Great minds,
MacGyver. Great minds.

Jack, I need your phone.

No way, man. Smash
your own damn cell phone.

Mine got toasted when
the helicopter went

snap-crackle-pop. Fellas,
whatever we're planning on doing,

you may want to
hurry things along.

Hey, this way.

Who is this guy?

(metal clanging)

People, I've got
operatives in the field

that I can't see or talk to.

Where are we on restoring
my comms and sat feed?

Um, the cell company just got

two of their towers
working again.

(computer chimes)

Whoa, whoa, hang on.

Mac's phone just synced a
large video file to the cloud.

MacGYVER: Okay.

Not sure if you guys
are gonna get this

before we're dead, but
we still have Murdoc.

Someone's trying to kill us.

And if this works, you're about
to get a real good look at him.

We need to go right
now, buddy. Let's go.

Okay, got it.

Fast-forward.

Okay, stop.

Take a screen grab and
run that through facial rec.

We've got a new
player in the game,

and I want to know
exactly who he is.

(cell phone chimes)

Okay, looks like cell
phone service is back up.

We need to let the Phoenix
know we're still alive.

Why don't you just
kill that nice woman

and steal her cell phone? No.

Fine.

I don't know how you two
get anything accomplished.

We're in a public library.
We don't need a phone.

Hey, guys.

Mac, Jack. It's a
big relief to see you.

I'm sending you
new exfil coordinates.

A team should be
there in four hours.

Okay, good. We'll lay
low. MURDOC: Matty.

Hi!

I just want to say how
nice it is seeing you again.

Shut it, Pennywise.
The adults are talking.

Did you guys get my
video? BOZER: We did.

But we didn't get
any hits on facial rec.

Maybe Murdoc knows him.

Send us the photo.

Oh! (laughing)

This is gonna be fun.

Matty, I think
we're in business.

Our psycho
recognizes your psycho.

Okay, who is this guy?

Why does he want you dead?

This... is Nicholas Helman.

Is that name supposed
to mean something?

Mm-hmm.

Means you might as well
start digging three graves

because that's the
man who trained me.

He taught me everything I know.

You think I'm bad?

Oh, you ain't seen nothing yet.

(tires screeching)

JACK: Okay, so, what's the deal

with this guy hunting you?

There's got to be a good reason

he wants you dead so
bad. It's quite sad, actually.

JACK: Is it?

Helman and I were
on a job together,

taking out a senator's
kids with a car bomb.

Standard stuff, really.

Helman was under the car

securing the device, when
the children came out early.

Now, this was a high-paying gig.

I didn't want to blow
the paycheck, so I...

blew the explosives.

(gun cocks)

(laughs)

Helman was horrifically
burned over 75% of his body.

It's a miracle he survived.

I mean, if you saw
him, you'd admit

the guy has got a
face for telethons.

You know, we'd have
better luck stopping him

if you told us the truth.

The truth is
irrelevant, MacGyver.

Helman wants us
dead, we're dead.

But I can't say no
to that face, Angus.

So here it is, the big truth.

Fresh out of high school,
I wanted nothing more

than to join the
United States Army.

They wouldn't have
me. Oh, imagine that.

Something about spectacularly
failing a psych exam. Oh, I'm shocked.

Right?

So, hopped the first flight out

of the good old U.S. of A.

Joined the first army
that would have me.

You joined a foreign military?

I'm pretty sure that's treason.

See, I had a burgeoning
interest in shooting people.

My new friends were willing

to indulge me.

See, what the U.S.
saw as a problem,

my new friends saw as a gift.

So they sent me
to train with Helman.

Why don't you
fast-forward to the part

where he wants to put
your dumb ass in the ground.

I can think of two
possible reasons.

One: I stiffed the guy on
a bill at a diner in Lisbon.

Still owe him $13.57.

Or two: I, uh, murdered
his wife right in front of him.

Probably the second one, huh?

Safe bet. Mm-hmm.

So what happened?

Well, after Helman had
trained me and the country

we'd sworn allegiance
to ceased to exist,

so we went to work for
some very, very bad people.

Until one day,

Helman met this woman

and he fell in love and...

decided he wanted
to quit the biz.

See, this isn't exactly the kind of job
you just turn in your two weeks' notice.

So they sent you in to
kill him. Sure enough.

Remember when I said
Helman was better than me?

Let me guess...
you tried to kill him,

missed, killed her instead,

and he's been
chasing you ever since.

(laughs): Ten points
for Gryffindor, Angus!

Whoo-hoo!

Yeah, see, that's
why I've never stayed

in the same place for long...
I always figured Helman

would catch up and make
good on his promise to end me.

Looks like today's the day!

(indistinct chatter)

All right. Thank you.

♪ ♪

Excuse me, Officer,

but I think I know who
stole that woman's van.

This is Officer...

Martinez.

I need to report a possible 207.

Hey, guys, I got an
incoming switchboard patch

from a caller who claims
to be Nicholas Helman.

Put it on speaker.

Okay.

This is Director Matilda Webber.

To whom am I speaking?

By now, I think you know
exactly to whom you're speaking.

You're in charge?

That's right.

Oh, good.

I have an offer.

Your two agents have no idea

what they're stepping
into the middle of.

So here's my proposal:

you give me Dennis,

and I'll let them live.

Dennis?

Well, you might know him

as Murdoc.

But it doesn't matter...

what is on his tombstone,

because there will be
a tombstone real soon.

The only question is,

will there be three?

♪ ♪

MURDOC: Ooh. I spy with
my little eye something red.

No takers? Hmm.

Ooh, how about 20 questions?

Ooh, the alphabet game.

Daddies, are we
there yet? Shut up.

I suppose a pee-pee break's

out of the question.
Shut up! Hey.

Just ignore him.

You were saying?

About what?

Diane. What about her?

You never finished.

Oh. Yeah, well...

I-I don't know,
dude, that was, like,

a hundred miles ago, you know?

Well, just talk about
something. Act like he's not there.

Okay.

To be honest, I
do think about her

and what could've been,
but to be really honest,

I think about, what if we
tried again and I screwed it up?

I always screw it up.

You're talking about Riley? Yes.

And I finally have Riley
back in my life again...

I don't want to lose
her. ♪ Home ♪

♪ Home on the range ♪

♪ Where the deer ♪

Can I shoot him? No.

♪ And the antelope lay ♪
I-I know I don't have

that many bullets
left, but I guarantee

he'll stop singing
before I use 'em all.

He's trying to get
a rise out of you.

♪ Where seldom ♪
I could pistol-whip him, huh?

♪ Is heard ♪ How
about a pistol-whip, huh?

♪ A discourag... ♪

How about a good
pistol-whip?! Shut up!

(panting): See?

That's better.

See? Everything's gonna be fine.

Actually, things just
got a whole lot worse.

What?

AMBER Alert.

That's us. Helman
must've called it in.

MURDOC: Ooh-hoo,
the old man's still got it.

We're not gonna make it
to exfil. We need some help.

(tires squeal)

Get out.

What now? You want
me to catch a pigeon?

Actually, I can fix this.

What?

I actually tried
raising pigeons once.

Shut up. What? It
was when I was a boy.

JACK: If you want to talk just to
hear yourself speak, Twisted Sister,

go right ahead... Doesn't
mean I have to listen.

Columba livia domestica.

Hey, did you know that
the domestic pigeon,

unlike our dear
darling Jack Dalton,

is actually considered a
highly intelligent creature?

That's absolutely
true. No, no, no,

I-I trained them to fly
up to great altitudes,

and then they'd swoop
down into their cages.

(laughing): And once
they mastered that,

I started tying these
little M-80 firecrackers

to their legs and...
(imitates quiet explosion)

What's the matter with you?

You like things that go boom.
I thought you'd like that story.

Hey, Mac. Almost.

No, no, no, man,
forget the phone.

Let me just kill him right here.

I'll make it quick.

Oh, I'm done. Take a second...

Whoo!

(giggles): Never gets old,

watching you,
Angus. (line rings)

It's so damned impressive.

Mac, please tell me
this is you. Hey, Matty.

We are on Route 65, mile
13, and we hit a bit of a snag.

Helman just called in an
AMBER Alert on our vehicle.

We're gonna try and
find another one, but...

we're in the middle of
nowhere... Can exfil come to us?

Yeah. Sit tight. I'll have a
chopper there in... Guys, I got

a cop car on
satellite coming in hot.

Based on his roof markings,

this cop's

way out of his jurisdiction.

Of course he is.

The driver's the opposite of
law enforcement, my dear Riley.

Helman has a penchant for
stealing emergency vehicles.

This just keeps getting
worse and worse.

Let me tell you something:

we ain't outrunning no cop
car in that pregnant roller skate.

(train whistle blowing)

Maybe we don't have to. Come on.

Don't push.

(tires screech)

(turns off engine)

♪ ♪

(radio static)

Helman?

(train whistle blowing)

You know, I love watching
you work, MacGyver, but...

this is completely unnecessary.

I mean, you two

are protecting me, supposedly.

It'd make no sense
for me to run away.

Well, even if it
did, now you can't.

Do we even know where
this tin can is going?

According to the manifest

on those crates there,

you're bound for the
Port of Los Angeles.

So without getting into a
literal junior high math problem,

about 18 hours.

Yeah, as long as Helman
doesn't factor into the equation.

Hey.

Don't be stupid.

Oh, I think you've got
that part covered, Jack.

(train whistle blowing)

MURDOC: Oh, Angus,
how goes the search

for dear old Daddy?

Making any headway?

(sighs)

Actually, yeah.

Yeah.

I found him living off the grid
in the Montana backwoods.

It's not easy, since we barely
know each other anymore,

but we're making an effort to patch
things up. Mm-hmm, yeah, well,

I see what you're
doing there... I like it.

What? No, no, no, no,

I'm making up a story, then
you're making up a story, oh!

Didn't work for you either, pal.

I see right through you.
Come on, MacGyver.

For once, can we
please just take the truth

for a little walkie-walk?

Okay, you first.

Why did you agree to
kill your former mentor?

Oh, wait. Is it possible...

that I'm not the only
one with daddy issues?

(chuckles)

Touché.

I have an abundance
of daddy issues.

They're just a different
flavor from yours, MacGyver.

See, my father
never abandoned me.

He stayed.

And...

well, I'll spare you
all the gory details,

but trust me when I say sometimes
it's better to be abandoned.

For everyone.

But not in the case
of Helman. Am I right?

You took it personally
when he ditched you.

I suppose when Helman retired,

I did... take it
a bit personally.

MacGyver, the man
was an artist of death,

someone that I greatly admired,

and then he goes and he
throws it all away for love?

Like... something I
never could understand.

What do you think, MacGyver,

do you know why your dad left?

I used to think I did.

I told him I blamed
him for my mom's death

right before he left.

But you know what?

I was a kid, I was hurting.

He had grown so distant
after she'd passed, I just...

I guess I wanted to see

if I could get a
reaction out of him.

You ever consider murdering him?

I don't want to get all
Freudian on you, but...

there is absolutely
nothing as cathartic

as killing your own father.

Trust me.

(whistle blows)

(sighs)

(door trills)

Sorry to keep you waiting.

It's been a hectic day.

Where's Riley?

I want to see my daughter.

Well, that will have
to wait till later.

Riley is busy working.
I don't mean to be rude,

but why do you
have me in this room?

For your own safety.

What happened at
MacGyver's house

was very serious and
should not be taken lightly.

And that much was very clear.

I recognize that
this is a lot to take in,

and I'm sure that
you have questions.

She warned me not to ask them.

Well, I believe
that at this point,

it's more dangerous to
leave you with questions

than to cue you in on
exactly what goes on here.

Come.

Take a walk with me.

After your incident last year,

I ran a background check
on you, just to be safe.

Which means that I can trust you

with the information
I'm about to share.

I don't know if I should
be concerned or flattered.

It's okay to be
a little bit of both.

To the outside world,
the Phoenix Foundation

is just a think tank.

But behind these walls, we
are a U.S. intelligence agency

tasked with taking down
enemies of the state,

stopping acts of terrorism,

and saving lives
all around the world

wherever they are imperiled.

So this is where
my daughter works.

Yes, sometimes.

And sometimes
she's out in the field.

The field?

Riley is a covert operative,
part of an elite team.

So my daughter's a spy
with the U.S. government

who puts her life at
risk all over the world,

and I have Jack
Dalton to thank for this?

You have every
right to be upset.

And all the reason to be proud.

The only thing I couldn't
make was a spoon.

So you want to...

You want to drink some beans?

That's disgusting. No,
I'm-I'm all beaned out.

Oh, if he doesn't
want the beans,

can I have them, MacGyver?

What? They look
like delicious beans.

Knock yourself out.

You realize you just gave
him a weapon, don't you?

What's he gonna do
with a can of beans?

Just keep an eye on him.

I let him get in
my head earlier.

Yeah, well, that's
what that fool does.

That's why you just got
to ignore him, like I do.

Yeah, I know.

But it did get me thinking.

What if my dad doesn't
really want to be found?

Come on, man. If
that was the case,

he wouldn't be
breaking into your house,

leaving you cryptic messages.

I don't know, but add that
to the growing list of things

that I don't know about my dad.

Including his
connection to Matty.

Yeah. Yeah, I'm still a
little foggy on that one.

Point is, I don't know why I'm
wasting so much time and energy

on someone who didn't
care enough to stick around

in the first place.
Right, right.

You know, I-I know I'm
beating a dead horse here,

but that's the way family
works sometimes, man.

It can take a man
years to realize he's...

made a mistake.

Is this about you now?

Well, I thought you were done.

What... (stammers)

It's Diane. She's-she's skipping
around in my head a little bit.

Hey, maybe that's a good thing.

Eh.

You two looked like you
were having fun at the party.

Well, you know, before the

assassin/schoolteacher
showed up, I mean.

Yeah, that's partially
why I left her the first time.

As much as I try to keep
business out of personal,

sooner or later that
job comes a-knocking.

And I hate to
break it to you, pal,

but guys in our line of work,

we don't get the
fairy tale ending.

Doesn't mean
you can't try. Yeah.

(train brakes squealing)

Do you mind? The beans.

Wait a second.

We're 30 miles
from the next stop.

Why are we slowing down?

JACK: Because he
found us, that's why.

(whistle blowing)

Well, we can't stay here.

Let's go.

Can I have my can of beans?

Your b... Thank you.

Fetch. Whoa!

(all grunting)

Well, so much for getting off
that train before he spotted us.

More good news...
We can't get in.

Well, I can shoot it off there,

but I think I better save
some ammo for the Terminator.

No-no-no, I-I can get through
this. It's low-grade steel.

I just need a piece of, uh,
heavy-duty, high-carbon steel...

All yours, MacGyver.

Don't do this. Get 'em off him.

If there was a contest
for all-time worst ideas,

this wins the blue ribbon.
We don't have a choice.

Ditch that creepy smile.

(grunts) Got it!

Murdoc!

Go!

Where is he?

I-I don't know.

You don't know?

There's not one,

but two psychopathic
killers on the loose.

I got about six bullets left.

You just had to let him
go. Yeah, you were right.

About what?

All-time worst idea ever.

Thank you.

What's the plan there,
homeslice? I'm working on it.

Yeah, well, kick the neurons
into hyperdrive, will you?

I got about six bullets left.

I heard you the
first time. Yeah,

the only reason I'm telling you

is so you don't blame me

when I can't save
your skinny ass.

Well, if you can't save
me, it's 'cause I'm dead,

so there'll be no
blaming, I can assure you.

Well, you're right.
That's a good point.

Yeah, that makes me
feel a whole lot better.

Not me. Oh, come on.

You know I'm not
gonna let anything...

You know, just forget it.

Yeah, forget it.
That's a good idea.

You just had to let him go.

Stop. I'm trying to
focus. Had to let him go.

(grunts)

I-I can work with this.

Yeah? Wh-What's the plan?

Oh, yeah. Uh, I'm gonna
make a drop net trap.

It's the same one that's
used on wild animals, but, uh,

we're gonna lure
Helman underneath it.

With what?

With live bait. Nice.

Ladies and gentlemen,
the role of "live bait"

will be played by your very
own Jack Dalton. Am I right?

Just long enough for
me to incapacitate him.

Yeah, okay, fine.

Hey, you want to
hear something funny?

Right now?

Of all the reasons I
want to live through this,

you know the one
thing that keeps popping

in my little nugget?

The Cowboys win the Super Bowl?

You'd think so,
right? Yeah, b-but no.

It's... Diane.

I'm kind of ready to
see where that might go,

you know what I mean?

That's romantic.

But maybe we should,
uh, worry about surviving

the two world's
deadliest killers first, huh?

All right, look.

I got this locked down.
I'm gonna set the trap.

You go find Helman
and bring him this way.

Yeah, okay. Good luck.

Save it for later.

Right.

(screams)

(Helman grunting)

(panting)

Well, well, well, MacGyver.

JACK: Hey! Drop it!

I said drop it!

Don't you move.

I just saved
MacGyver's life, Jack.

You really think I
want to take it now?

You don't expect me
to believe that, do you?

No, Jack, he-he's
telling the truth.

He's the only reason I'm alive.

What do you want?

Huh?

We both know you
don't have a heart.

Even if you did,

you wouldn't do anything
out of the goodness of it.

Well, now that you mention it.

(groans)

There is something that
I would like in exchange

for my bravery and heroism.

Something only you can give me.

I'm not in a wheelchair.

I... I'm just trying to help.

Yeah, well, calm down.

Hey, everyone.

BOZER: Hey, what's up?
RILEY: Welcome home, Mac.

MATTY: Hey, welcome home.

Hey. Hi.

Nicholas Helman is dead,

and Murdoc is back in custody.

Ooh. Right to
business. I like it.

Well, it might not have been
pretty, but at least it's a win.

Good job.

Does this mean we get a raise?

No.

Diane, I heard Matty
brought you to the Phoenix.

And-and you got
to see what it is

we actually do.

I did.

And-and I'm sure
you're pretty pissed,

but I just...

I'm not complaining, but
what was that for? (laughs)

Honestly, I'm still
trying to figure out

the Phoenix of it all.

And believe me, we
will return to this topic

of you putting my
daughter in harm's way.

But for now, I want to thank
you for believing in Riley.

And for giving her
a second chance.

Oh, you're welcome.

Even if it is a dangerous one.

Well, to dangerous
second chances. (laughs)

And not so dangerous.

So it looks like I'm back

in the knife wound,
bullet hole, shrapnel club.

I know, man.

Through and through. Yeah.

Just enough to get
you out of the way.

I still can't believe
Murdoc saved your life.

(sighs) Yeah.

Well, as it turns out,

there was something he wanted
a lot more than seeing me dead.

Dad!

I've been looking
everywhere for you, buddy.

Want to see what I drew?

Only more than anything.

Oh, wow, that's wonderful.

I have more. Maybe you
can show 'em to me later.

Are we going home?

Do you still have that
birthday present that I sent you?

Perfect.

Do me a favor.
Can you put 'em on?

Now play your favorite song.

Turn up the volume really
loud and close your eyes.

And keep 'em closed real
tight until I tell you to open 'em.

Okay?

♪ The best day of my life ♪

♪ Everything is looking
up, everybody up now ♪

♪ This is gonna be
the best day of my life ♪

♪ My li-i-i-i-i-ife. ♪

Hey, pal, Daddy has
to make a quick stop

before we get where we're going.

Do me a favor.

Put your headphones back on.

♪ ♪

Hello, Henry.

I want you to know
that I came for you first.

Captioning sponsored by CBS