MacGyver (2016–…): Season 1, Episode 14 - Fish Scaler - full transcript

(heavy breathing)

MacGYVER: I'll be honest with you, man.

Things don't look too good for you.

I mean, I'm a nice guy,

but I just got this new boss,

Matilda Webber...

and she's merciless
with terrorists like you.

You're nervous... and you should be...

because in a few minutes you're
gonna be alone in a room with her,

and there's nothing I can do to help.

(shouts)



From where I'm standing, doesn't
look like I need any help...

(shouting)

Okay.

- You were saying?
- Uh, I was just, uh...

Maybe you could teach me this move, too?

You work in the lab, Boze.

I don't think Director Webber's gonna
be too concerned with your field skills.

Yeah, but you don't not know
that she's not gonna not care.

Was that a quadruple negative?

I don't know. I lost count.

Look, I just want to
be ready for anything.

Did I at least beat Riley's time?

It's not a competition.

- We're going again.
- Bozer.



Going again. Going again.

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

So... are we cool?

We just stared each other down

for three minutes straight, Jack.

What do you think?

I take it you're not
gonna apologize, then?

Are you going to apologize?

- It wasn't my plan.
- Oh, you had a plan?

- (laughs)
- Of course.

Well, I guess there's
a first for everything.

Oh, come on, is this the
way it's gonna be between us?

Just cheap shots and staring contests?

No, Jack, because as much as
I love a good staring contest,

- which I won, by the way...
- No.

... we're not nine and I
signed on as director of Phoenix

to get things done.

So, you and I are gonna sit
here, like two rational adults,

and work this out.

- (mumbling): Being an adult...
- Did you just do that...

little kid mumble-under-
your-breath thing?

No.

So... Jack's evaluation
seems to be going well.

I can't believe we all
have to do one of those.

Can't she just fire me
based on my résumé?

Relax.

These two have some sort of...

history.

He claims she's the
reason he left the CIA.

RILEY: Any idea what
happened between them?

No, he won't tell me.

Which means whatever it is...
it's got to be his fault.

MacGYVER: It also
means that unless Matty

was your station chief for
18 months in South America,

these evaluations are
nothing to worry about.

RILEY: Oh, really?

Is that why yours
keeps getting postponed?

- Postponed?
- RILEY: Oh, yeah. Twice.

First, a coffee machine
mysteriously catches fire.

Then, a well-placed gum wrapper

puts Phoenix's entire
security system on lockdown.

I know, it's weird. I wonder
how that got wedged in there.

BOZER: So maybe Riley
and I aren't the only ones

feeling a little nervous
about these evaluations.

- (sighs)
- (phone chimes)

Can't stall forever, Mac.

Just got a text.

(phones chiming)

From Matty Webber.

MacGYVER: "Get your asses in here."

- Everything okay in here?
- Yeah, super.

We were just reminiscing
about old times, weren't we?

- Yeah.
- Yeah.

Riley, can you tell us about
a program that you coded

called "FR-1507"?

Uh, yeah, yeah.

It's a new facial-recognition program
I'm working on. (clears throat)

Still in beta testing right now,

but we're comparing random
faces in YouTube videos

to the FBI's Most Wanted list to
train it to eliminate false positives.

Well, you may have been
looking for false positives,

but you found a real criminal.

Take a look at what just came in.

JACK: Bummer it had to
interrupt our little chitchat.

Shut up, Jack.

Oh, snap, I saw this
already. It's amazing.

Hey, watch right here when the
bottle breaks over the dude's head.

And... bam!

(both laughing)

Wait, this ding dong
stealing Ding Dong's

- on the FBI's Most Wanted?
- Not him.

- Him.
- Oh.

This guy is a 17-point match

for a fugitive named Douglas Bishop,

number six on FBI's Most Wanted.

Bishop was a top
lieutenant in the Philly mob

until Special Agent Eva Santos

was tasked with busting him.

MacGYVER: According to this,

Bishop gunned her down and escaped
before he could stand trial.

Yeah, the FBI's gonna want this collar.

He killed one of their own.

Shouldn't we be sharing
this intel with them?

I'd love to if we can trust them.

- We can't trust the feds?
- Not on when it comes to Bishop.

He's been on their radar for years,

targeted in multiple investigations,

and then somehow has
slipped through the cracks

every single time.

You think he's got an agent in
his pocket, helping him escape?

I think that there's
reason to suspect it,

and until we know the truth, we
can't trust anyone at the FBI.

We want Bishop to answer
for killing a federal agent,

we're just gonna have
to catch him ourselves.

Mac, Jack, you'll find Bishop.

Riley, you'll run
surveillance from Phoenix.

And Bozer... what exactly
is it that you do here again?

I... work in the lab?

I know. I was messing with you.

(both chuckle)

I want you and Riley here

so that we can do your evaluations.

Okay, people, this is our
first op together as a team.

Time to show me what you've got.

(bell chimes)

Ilene Preskin?

All right, look, I'll tell you two
guys what I told the other guys.

I am not looking for representation.

I do not want to do any
television appearances,

and I am not looking
to sell my life rights.

MacGYVER: Ma'am... who
is it you think we are?

Come on, you Hollywood types
been coming here, bugging me

ever since my nephew
posted that damn video.

You think we're, uh...

We are Hollywood types.
She got us pegged.

You got a great eye.
Yeah, especially this guy.

Totally. We are from Hollywood,

and we're here about your video,

but we're actually looking for this man.

We think he has that certain

"it factor" that we need
for our next project.

- Do you know him?
- Charlie?

Yeah, I know him. He
comes in here all the time.

And does Charlie have a last name?

A stage name, perhaps?

Well, I don't know, I never asked,

but it's not like you need
an ID to buy Gooey-Pies.

He comes in here once a day.

He gets a box of them Gooey-Pies,

and we just...

chat.

Do you know where he lives?

No... but I should for as long
as he's been flirting with me.

I mean, he's never asked me out, but,

I mean, you don't not like a girl if
you've made that many sketches for her.

Oh. May I?

Knock yourself out...

but I'll tell you what,

you use Charlie's name,

and I will sue you.

- Well, thanks, Ilene,
- you've been extremely helpful.

She has?

You have.

I think I'm gonna have my people
call your people. Do lunch.

- (door opens)
- Ciao, mama.

(bell chimes)

Okay, all right.

I know I'm probably
missing something again,

but didn't she just say she didn't know
Douglas' last name or where he lived?

Yeah, that's right.

Don't tell me you just turned a photo

of a sketch of a bird
into a fugitive finder?

- Okay, I won't tell you, then.
- Okay, smarty-pants.

Now you have to tell me, I insist.

See this sketch?

Yeah.

Well, it's a view out of a window,

and I'm thinking it's Bishop's window.

Since we can identify
two large buildings,

we're just a little trigonometry away

from finding out exactly where he lives.

Yeah, that's a little far-fetched.

Hey, I don't really look like
a Hollywood type to you, do I?

Just from the eyes up, really.

- Look at you.
- ♪ Look out ♪

♪ Pop, pop, it's showtime ♪

- ♪ Showtime ♪
- ♪ Showtime ♪

- ♪ Showtime ♪
- ♪ Guess who's back again ♪

- ♪ Oh, they don't know? ♪
- ♪ Go on, tell 'em ♪

- ♪ Oh, they don't know? ♪
- ♪ Go on, tell 'em ♪

♪ I bet they know as
soon as we walk in ♪

- ♪ Sho' 'nuff... ♪
- Oh!

I didn't know you were...

How long have you been standing there?

18 and a half minutes.

Okay.

Do you need to change your undies?

No, I'm good.

I think.

I wanted to remind you that
your evaluation is tomorrow.

- I didn't forget.
- I'm sure you didn't.

Well, thanks for coming by.

It's always good to see you?

Oh, I'm not leaving. I
came to watch you work.

Great.

Yeah, definitely Bishop's apartment.

Buddy, you could've at least
waited to block our only exit

until I made sure the guy who...

likes to kill federal agents isn't home?

I'm just glad we broke
into the right apartment.

Trig's a little rusty.

You're sure this is this guy's place?

Yeah, kettle's still warm.

He was just here.

Okay, so... what, did he hear
us coming and take off, or what?

Yeah, or he's coming back.

I say we hole up across
the street and wait for him.

(doorknob rattles)

Maybe he forgot something.

- FBI, FBI!
- Drop-drop it!

- FBI, hands in the air!
- You drop it!

- Hands in the air!
- Hands in the air!

(handcuffs tighten)

One's got a gun,

the other has a Swiss Army knife.

No identification of any kind.

All right, fellas,

who are you and what
are youse doing here?

Okay, we are door-to-door
Bible salesmen.

Do yourself a favor and don't get smart.

- Okay, fella?
- Okay.

Now tell us your names.

What are we being charged with?

You were caught in the
apartment of a wanted felon.

Right, but what are
we being charged with?

If we're being formally charged,

we have a right to know.

- Well, uh, what? All right.
- Let's get in the car.

- Asked you a question.
- Just get in the car.

Okay. All right, I'm in.

(car door closes)

Well, so much for finding
Bishop before the feds do.

I don't think these
guys had to find him.

Did you hear their accents?

They're not from around
here, that's a Philly accent.

Yeah. Bishop's old stomping grounds.

If either one of these guys
are on Bishop's payroll,

I don't think this trip
ends at the FBI field office.

- Nope.
- We got to get out of here.

- Think of something.
- (sighs)

Oh, I got something.

And even I don't like it.

JACK: Do it.

(grunts)

(grunts)

(chuckling): Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Hey! Hey, hey, hey, what are you doing?

- (grunts)
- Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Hey!

Hey, points for originality,

but this only counts as
an escape if we don't die.

MacGYVER: Yeah, this is the
"even I don't like it" part.

(lock clicks)

(chuckles)

JACK: Let's go, man.

Come on, man.

(horn honking)

(tires screeching)

(laughs)

- We got ignition.
- (engine starts)

(tires screeching)

(groans)

(horns blaring)

(groans)

- Yeah!
- (whoops)

(laughing): Yeah! That was awesome!

Now, let's never do it again.

Just a reminder.

Don't tell the Hun about our little
run-in with the feds, all right?

Yep. I was thinking the same thing.

(laughs)

And you thought you
didn't need to tell me

about stealing a car from two FBI agents

because you were hoping
I wouldn't find out?

JACK: Sorry, Matty,

but I have no idea what
you're talking about right now.

We're up on all FBI
communications, Jack.

And I'm looking at a field report

from two agents whose
Sedan was just boosted

by two male suspects found
in Bishop's apartment.

- Well, that could be anybody.
- Really?

Okay, yes, we should have told you.

But it's not the headline here.

We were in Bishop's apartment

two minutes before the feds showed up,

and they were from Philly.

We're already looking at
every fed in the Philly office.

This now moves your new
pals, Brooks and Cho,

to the top of the suspect list.

But I needed you two

to find Bishop before the feds.

And from what Riley tells me,

you may have missed your chance.

The FBI's watching all mass transit.

They just found a car
registered under Bishop's alias.

Parked in front of a train station.

Great, now we definitely
know he's not on a train.

And we know that how?

Because Bishop's been on
the run for eight years.

He's too smart to make a
rookie mistake like that.

Okay, baby Einstein.

You know where he's not.

Got anything to tell us where he is?

Yeah, actually, I might.

Riley, check all Atlanta bus schedules.

See if there's a Bus 23.

Parked at 5:00 p.m.

Yep. Bus 23 departs from Forsyth Station

at 5:00 p.m. today.

How'd you know that?

- I read the paper.
- Yeah, okay, Matty,

we'd love to stay and chitchat,

but it looks like we
have a bus to catch.

- Bye-bye.
- (phone beeps)

Ma'am, you have an incoming call
from Martin Dryer on the secure line.

Should I know a Martin Dryer?

Regional director of the FBI.

Oh, fancy.

I'll take it in here,
thanks. (intercom chimes)

Director Dryer, Matilda
Webber, what can I do for you?

Ms. Webber, please forgive
the bluntness of my question,

but I am on a clock.

Do you have any agents
in the field in Atlanta?

Well, I'm not sure what
agency you think I work for,

- but I'm...
- Actually, Ms. Webber,

I have no idea where you landed.

What I do know is that you transferred

out of a high-level position
with Homeland Security

and you didn't show up anywhere else.

And since the CIA, the NSA and the DEA

won't claim the two operatives that
just stole an FBI vehicle in Atlanta,

I figured maybe they
were working for you.

I can neither confirm nor deny.

Don't want to share any intel with me,

that's fine, I get it.

But I'm gonna share some with you.

Did you get the InterAgency Memo

about one of the FBI's Ten Most Wanted

showing up in a viral video?

Douglas Bishop?

It might have crossed my desk.

Well, I believe that Bishop
has eluded capture for so long

because he has one of
our agents on his payroll.

Huh. Interesting theory.

I wish it were just a theory.

It's just come to my attention

that two of the agents
from our Philly office

are down in Atlanta looking for Bishop.

Without authorization,

a thousand miles outside
their jurisdiction.

And you think one or both
of them might be dirty?

I do, but without knowing
all the players in the game,

I can't be completely sure,
so I'm gonna ask you again.

Come on, Martin.

Don't make me do the
"confirm or deny" thing

twice in one phone call.

Okay, look, cards on the table.

I don't know who I can trust
at the Bureau right now,

but I do know your reputation,

so if there's anything
you can do to help...

I would do it in a heartbeat.

And if and when that
opportunity should arise,

you will be the first to know.

In the meantime, good
luck with your missing car.

(call ends)

The moment we have Bishop, call me.

_

(indistinct announcement over P.A.)

So how long you think you
can keep not telling me?

Not telling you what?

MacGYVER: You know
what I'm talking about.

What happened between you and Matty?

I don't know, how long's forever?

(chuckles) Come on, man.

- You come on, man.
- Hey, look, we're not just partners,

we're family, so any problem
you have is a problem of mine.

Okay.

Besides, if it were me
who had the dark history

between our new boss, you'd be like,

(imitating Jack): "Hey,
listen, man. You got to..."

Yeah, yeah, do that Yosemite Sam,

I'm-a punch you right
in the mouth. Go on.

Look, all I'm saying is you're
gonna tell me eventually,

you might as well spill it now.

- No.
- Is she really the reason

you left the CIA?

JACK: Oh.

Right when I was about to tell you.

There's our boy.

Yeah, but this isn't over yet.

Hey, stop! Stop!

Hey, move!

Move!

Hey.

(screams)

Move, move, move! Stop!

Move!

Stop!

Stop, man, stop!

(grunts)

Bishop? Bishop?

Hey, hey, hey! Relax.

No more running. You understand me?

Huh?

Who are you?

I can tell you who we're not:
we're not your buddies at the FBI.

No, don't turn me over to the FBI.

Please.

You can drop the act, we know you
have an FBI agent on your payroll.

What?

No!

I never had a fed in my pocket.

It was the other way around.

You better explain that statement.

For years, an FBI agent

has been forcing me to
do his dirty work for him.

If he finds me,

he'll kill me.

So, a dirty FBI agent
is trying to kill you?

Who is it?

Give us a name.

If I knew his name, you
think I'd still be running?

I never met the guy.

For years, it's just
been a voice on the phone,

threatening to kill me if
I didn't do what he said.

Do what he said, huh? Like what?

BISHOP: Whatever he told me to do.

Ratting people out, planting evidence.

Murdering a federal agent?

Eva? I didn't kill her!

I was trying to confess to her.

I was gonna turn myself in.

I-I couldn't take working
for this guy anymore.

And I needed a fed who
I knew I could trust.

Eva had a spotless record a-and...

there's no way that she could be the guy

on the other end of the phone, right?

So, I-I told her that I wanted out,

I wanted to testify, I-I
wanted to help take down

this bastard been runnin' me.

She offered protective custody.

But the night we met up
for her to take me in,

someone shot her.

- That's not what the evidence says.
- Who's collecting this evidence?

The FBI.

This dirty agent killed Santos

to cover his tracks.

They tried to pin it on me.

And if he was willing to kill her,

I knew I'd be next. So I ran.

- Riley, did you catch all that?
- Yep.

But, uh, hey,

remember those two
feds you guys ran into?

Brooks and Cho? How could I forget?

- They ever find their car?
- Yeah,

I'm pretty sure they did,

because after you all became besties,

I took the liberty of
illegally tracking their phones.

Looks like they just
pulled up at the depot.

Oh. I don't know if I'm
ready to believe his story,

but I'm sure as hell not ready
to hand him over to these guys.

Agreed, let's get
anywhere that ain't here,

so we can hole up, figure this out.

Uh, Director Webber, I
didn't hear you come in.

Because I didn't want you to.

And please call me Matty.

Director Webber was my father.

That was a joke.

So, I shouldn't call you Matty?

Call me Matty.

My father sold shoes for a living.

Which was the joke.

- (softly): Oh.
- Never mind.

Have a seat. It's time
for your evaluation.

Well, MacGyver and Jack just
caught Bishop and they said that...

He was framed by a dirty fed for murder.

Yeah. I'm on comms, too.

Then is now the best
time for an evaluation?

Sit.

So you were in federal prison,

two years into a five-year sentence,

and then a traitor pulls some strings

and you get early release.

Well, actually, it was Jack's
idea to get me out, so...

Is that supposed to make me feel better?

Um...

yes?

So you hacked the NSA

not once, but twice.

Your latest time while
working here at Phoenix.

What's not in your file,

is that a year before
your first NSA hack,

you hacked the Pentagon.

- I don't, I don't know what you're...
- Yes, yes, you do, Riley.

Or should I call you Artemis37?

You used a different handle

and you went to some extreme
lengths to anonymize yourself.

But I know it was you.

I also know that you
snooped around a little bit

and you didn't steal any files.

But what I don't know is why.

Look...

I'll admit I've made
some really bad decisions.

But since I joined
Phoenix, for the first time,

I've had the opportunity
to do the right thing,

to be one of the good guys.

This job is a second chance for me.

Please don't take that away.

A nice speech.

And I believe sincere.

But that still doesn't
answer my question: why?

May I hazard a guess, Riley?

I think you hacked the Pentagon

just to see if you could.

See, that mind of yours
is like a loaded gun.

And a gun just wants to fire.

It doesn't particularly care
who or what it shoots at.

Which is where I come in.

You've fallen into my hands,

and it's on me to aim
you at the right targets.

So I'm keeping you on the team...

on a provisional basis.

Now, if that sounds good to you,

how about you help me figure
out if Bishop is lying to us?

(quietly): Yeah.

♪ ♪

(electrical zap, fan rattling)

Hey.

- Anything from Phoenix?
- Not a peep.

They're still combing
through old FBI case files,

trying to make sure
his story checks out.

Yeah, okay, good.

So I parked the rental car

about ten blocks to the
south, searched the perimeter.

The good news is, our
pals Brooks and Cho

have no earthly idea where we are.

What's the bad news?

Oh, the diner across
the street's closed.

So dinner's coming out of
the hotel vending machine.

There you go, bon appétit.

Where do Gooey-Pies and diet
soda fall on the food pyramid?

Oh, I don't know, I just tried
to represent every food group.

Here you go, America's Most
Wanted, have a Gooey-Pie.

No, thanks. I hate these things.

MacGYVER: What?

Then why'd you buy them every day?

JACK: 'Cause he didn't go
there for the Gooey-Pies,

he went there for Ilene, didn't you?

When I first got into town,

I'd been on the run
for about three months.

I happened to walk in this
little convenience store

and there she was.

Ilene.

She smiled at me.

That was it.

First time anyone showed me any kindness

in I don't know how long.

I just stood there smiling
back at her like a dumbass.

She asked me what I wanted.

I-I couldn't speak,
I couldn't even think.

And I just pointed at the Gooey-Pies.

Well, that explains the first box.

Well, next time I went in,

she smiled at me again and
I pointed at the Gooey-Pies.

Guess I was afraid that
if I explained to her

that I didn't actually like Gooey-Pies,

I might end up telling
her my whole life story.

Sounds crazy, right?

Being on the run can do
weird things to your mind.

So you guys, uh, are really not FBI?

Come on, baby, do we look like FBI?

- (soft chuckle)
- Just know that with us you're safe.

So I might actually get
the chance to testify

and go to prison?

You want to go to prison?

I know being locked up is no picnic,

but what I've been through
the past eight years

is no kind of life.

You can't get close to anyone.

You can't even trust
anyone. I mean, I...

I met the love of my life six years ago,

and I can't even risk
asking her out to dinner.

Believe it or not, we can relate.

A few minutes with
the right one is better

than a lifetime with the wrong one.

What's her name?

Mm. Sarah.

(soft chuckle)

Well,

here's to Sarah.

And Ilene.

And to a few minutes with the right one.

- There you go. All right.
- (phone rings)

(quietly): Oh.

- Yes, ma'am?
- So this is interesting.

We're going through the FBI's evidence

in the Eva Santos murder case.

"Interesting" as in he's
been telling the truth

or "interesting" as in he's
been lying through his teeth?

Well, that's the interesting part.

The FBI's key evidence is a
security video of the murder.

- I'm sending it to you now.
- (phone chimes)

JACK: Well, this doesn't
look good for Bishop.

RILEY: Well, that's what
we thought, too, at first.

This video was recorded using

a 15-year-old CCD surveillance camera

onto magnetic tape.

Hence all the static.

RILEY: Hence almost all the static.

I ran statistical analysis on the video.

Most of the static is just random noise,

actual degradation.

But the burst that happens
when Santos was shot

contains repeating pattern.

Meaning it was computer-generated?

MATTY: Meaning that this video

has been tampered with.

Someone added the static in

the moment Santos was shot.

So, if Bishop was telling the truth,

the person who tampered with the video

and the person who
shot her are the same.

Our dirty fed?

JACK: We-We need to see
what really happened.

Riley, can you twist the
vertical knob thingy...

Okay, one, no one knows
what you're talking about.

Two, if you mean clean
it up, the answer is yes.

I used the static's repeating
pattern to back-engineer

- the algorithm that rendered it...
- Hey, yeah, nobody knows

what you're talking about, just do it.

Whatever.

This is what the video looks like

with the fake static removed.

Well, have yourself
another Gooey-Pie, Bishop.

- Your story checks out.
- He didn't shoot Santos.

And someone at the FBI
made it look like he did.

Our dirty fed is real.

(fan rattling)

RILEY: Uh, guys?

We just intercepted an
FBI bulletin that went

to the Atlanta PD 15 minutes ago.

It gives your exact location

and warns that all three of
you are armed and dangerous.

Which would explain why
the SWAT team's outside

loaded for bear.

Go, go.

(fan rattling on and off)

JACK: Well, whoever this
dirty fed is, he isn't stupid.

Sending the locals to grab us so he
can stay anonymous? That's a smart move.

Can we marvel at his
intelligence after we escape?

BISHOP: Sounds like we're
all on the same page.

How do we get out of here?

(fan rattles)

- SWAT OFFICER: All clear! Move out!
- Jack, give me your room key.

Is there a Bible in there?

(fan rattling)

Yeah.

SWAT OFFICER: All
right, next, next door!

JACK: What are you doing?

I'm making a bump key to
get into the adjoining room.

If I can file it down enough,
I can jam it in the key hole

and bump the lock open.

SWAT OFFICER: Go, go, move, move!

(fan continues rattling)

(whispering): Let's go, let's go.

(shower running, man whistling)

(shower stops, officer shouts)

(whistling continues)

Move.

Bathroom's clear.

Room's clear.

- I've got nothing.
- Let's move, let's go!

Where are you now?

JACK: We are on 75 South.

We couldn't make it
back to our rental car,

so we, uh...

we kind of stole another one.

- You stole another vehicle?
- JACK: Yeah.

At least this one doesn't
belong to the federal government.

Yeah, it should be noted here, Matty,

that we're telling you
the truth this time.

The truth. I'm honored.
What do you want, a cookie?

JACK: Cookies are good, man, I like 'em.

Not the way I'm gonna
feed 'em to you, you won't.

Well, while you two have
been busy racking up felonies,

I think we identified our dirty fed.

Riley traced the FBI bulletin that
sent the SWAT team after you guys.

Whoever issued the order
tried to anonymize themselves,

but I was able to match the
device that sent the order

to the IMEI number of a cell
phone we're already monitoring.

MacGYVER: Agent Brooks.
Why am I not surprised?

MATTY: Our agents took him
into custody ten minutes ago,

but we're still checking
to see if his partner, Cho,

or any other feds are involved.

So it's safe to bring in Bishop now?

I'm making arrangements
now for you to hand him off

to an FBI agent I trust.

We'll send you location
details as soon as we have them.

This isn't the lab. I
thought this was the lab...

_

What are you doing here?

I work here?

- Remember?
- Yes, Bozer.

I mean what are you doing
here in the war room, again?

Your evaluation isn't
until this afternoon.

I know, and I know it's
probably gonna go badly,

and I probably won't have
a job here afterwards,

but I had to come talk to you.

'Cause this thing happened
at my old job where

an assistant manager, he
was forging time cards.

But the dude still got a promotion

because he covered his tracks so well,

- everybody...
- Okay, Bozer,

I would love for this story to contain

100% less burger-related info

and some hint of a point.

I was looking through
Agent Brooks' file...

the guy you say is guilty... and, well,

you got it wrong.

I got it wrong?

Respectfully...

yes.

According to his FBI
file, Brooks is in his 40s,

with 20 years of
experience at the Bureau.

Okay, you're not telling me
anything that I don't already know.

My point is, Brooks is still
running around on street detail.

If he had been dirty all this time,

using Bishop to plant
evidence and frame people,

don't you think he'd be
higher up the ladder by now?

Look, I know I don't have

much experience when it
comes to this kind of work...

You have no experience when
it comes to this kind of work.

Yeah. But I've had tons of bosses.

And Brooks?

He's no boss.

(tires screeching)

(phone rings)

Yeah?

MATTY: Did you make the handoff yet?

No, we're doing it right now.

Is the agent you're with
a six-foot-one black guy?

No. Why?

Then whoever you're meeting with
isn't who I sent to bring in Bishop.

- Take good care of him.
- Will do.

That voice...

Jack, get Bishop away from him, now!

Don't let him get Bishop!

If I were you, cowboy,
I'd back away slowly,

or someone's gonna get hurt.

You! I want every Phoenix
agent in MacGyver's vicinity

headed for his location now.

You, get the deputy director
of the FBI on the phone.

You, contact the
Atlanta chief of police.

Right. I want every black and
white backing up our people.

Ma'am, I have the
deputy director of the...

Lou, it's Matty. You know that fugitive

you guys are looking
for, Douglas Bishop?

Yeah, well, we found him,

and one of your agents
is about to murder him.

Dryer, put the gun down and let's talk.

I don't see you walking away from this.

Sure I will.

Like you said, I'm the one with the gun.

I was trying to keep
this all nice and neat.

I was hoping to end all this

by taking Bishop for a
little walk in the woods

and then quietly retiring,
no one the wiser...

Yeah, yeah, life's
full of disappointments.

Drop the gun.

You can't shoot us all,
I can promise you that.

I don't have to shoot
everybody, just Bishop.

Because I don't care
if he dies, but you do.

- So you're gonna stay where you are...
- No, I'm not.

Uh, uh... And we're gonna back up,

get in my car, and drive away.

MacGYVER: Then what?

Killing him won't end this.

We know you're dirty.
Our boss has proof.

What, you don't think
I have an exit strategy?

DRYER: I've been socking
away cash for years.

And I've become an expert
at making people disappear.

So when I'm gone, you'll never find me.

JACK: Think this through.

Being on the run sucks. Just ask Bishop.

He's been looking over his shoulder

ever since he left Philly.

Now, pretty please, don't move,

or I'll kill you.

Yeah, sorry, it was
all I could think of.

As long as he's in handcuffs, I'm good.

- JACK: Hey.
- CHO: Hey.

Sorry we stole your car, man.

- No worries. We found it.
- Oh, good.

And sorry we got you busted.

You know, it was an accident.

It was an honest mistake.
And besides, we're even now.

This jackass has been torpedoing
my career for over a decade.

I'm gonna get a big
promotion out of this bust.

Ooh, sounds like a
win-win for everybody.

Except for you. You're a loser.

Let's take a little walk.

Okay. Bye-bye.

- Thanks for the phone call.
- Yeah.

You know, I don't like to eavesdrop,

but I could tell that wasn't a lawyer.

I called the convenience store.

I told Ilene everything.

We got a date next week.

You do know that you're
going to prison, right?

I mean, after everything you've done...

No, I, I know.

She's gonna come and visit
me in lockup on Thursday.

She's gonna bring me cookies.

Okay... I get that my
view is gonna include bars

for quite a while, but honestly...

for the first time
in years, I feel free.

And that's all thanks to you, MacGyver.

Hey, have you seen Bozer?
I texted him on my way in.

Wishing him luck with his evaluation,

but he didn't get back to me.

- He's in there already, isn't he?
- Yeah, yeah.

If it goes anything like mine did,

he's gonna come out seriously rattled.

(both laughing)

But, really, you had
the guts to question me

when most people wouldn't have.

When you knew you were
right and I was wrong.

And because of that,

a dirty fed is behind bars,

and the witness that can
keep him there is still alive.

Oh, you guys did all the hard stuff.

You might not know a
lot about tradecraft,

but that I can teach.

What I can't teach is
speaking truth to power.

And that is the most valuable
skill that an agent can have.

You're making me blush.

- Later, Boze.
- Bozer.

- She likes Bozer?
- Aw, come on.

Everybody likes Bozer.

Yes, that includes me.

Maybe she's not as
hard to get along with

as you say she is, Jack.

Yeah, what happened between you two?

- She strand you on a mission somewhere?
- No.

Disavow you to a foreign government?

Force you to cut your hair
to conform to military code?

No, the... this wasn't
about a stupid haircut, okay.

What happened between me
and the Hun is personal.

We were, actually, really close friends

up until this undercover op in Chechnya.

Mm, Chechnya.

Okay, and then what?

Don't stop now, I need to know this.

All right, well, everything
was cool when we got there...

MacGyver, you're up.

Yeah, yes, ma'am.

Looks like story time's
over, Grasshopper.

Good luck.

- We'll get back to this.
- Yeah. Godspeed.

First off, I want you to
know that I respect you,

your reputation, and
your performance history.

Thank you.

- I respect you and your...
- That said,

I want you to know that while
your constant improvising is...

impressive,

I am not a big fan of
"make it up as you go along"

Say what you will about Jack Dalton...

and I've said a lot...

but the man is a hell of an agent.

I know how he thinks,
so I know how to use him.

You, on the other hand,
I'm not so sure about.

- Did you want me to respond?
- Thornton ran a loose ship,

maybe because she liked you

and she wanted to watch your back.

Or maybe because she was a double agent

and she didn't really care if you died.

Either way, from now on,
things will be different.

I hope you don't think that I'm confused

as to who runs the Phoenix, ma'am.

"Matty"

Why is it so hard to get
you people to call me Matty?

Did Thornton have some weird
thing about her first name?

Uh, rhetorical question.

Look, they say that
it's better to be lucky

than it is to be good.

But in my experience,
anyone who has ever said that

has wound up dead.

So far, I think you've
been really lucky.

I don't want to be watching on a monitor

the day your luck runs out.

Respectfully, ma'am... Matty, it's...

not luck.

Then prove it.

You disagree with me? Good.

I can respect that.

This isn't a business where
you can doubt yourself,

not even for an instant.

But I need you to
either play by my rules,

or prove me wrong.

Show me that your way works

and won't get you killed, I'll back off.

But mess up even one time,

and the word "improvise"
falls out of your vocabulary.

So what do you say?

You up for the challenge?

Matty...

I look forward to it.